At some point you have to chose self love and self respect. You may want your ex back to continue to give your unconditional love end of the day unconditional love doesn’t mean unconditional tolerance.
So much of my situation mirrors exactly what's discussed on this site. An ex contacted me after 2 years. This was a 'cold case'; he'd been cold towards me. He talks about how he's learned valuable lessons. I hope he has for his own sake. I'm learning from this experience too. Both of us need lots of growth. So grateful for this channel and its counsel. It's kept me sane and helped mend my ❤. Take heart, everyone!
Almost a year in, in a week. It's amazing how far and lost as I was a year ago. Things have gotten better but it's been a loooong road. Keep your head up and keep trucking.
My ex left me about 9 months ago after being together for about 6 months. Our bond was so strong but I messed up.. I would’ve been blocked if it wasn’t for our financial ties. In the beginning I did beg and all that crap but i eventually backed off and thought she was starting to come around because there was some indirect direct reachs from her but i just found out she might go live with her ex from before me in another state. I know she still has feelings for me but she’s scared and stubborn. As painful as it is I’m still going to do the work and if she decides to give me a chance then it’ll all be thanks to you coach! If she doesn’t I know I’ll still be a better me. But part of me still wants to hold on to the possibility of us reconciling but I know she needs time sometimes that’s the only thing that’ll help a person heal. Hopefully someday soon I can book a coaching session with you because I really need it.
Don't waste your life away waiting for someone else to come back to you. Don't rob yourself of an opportunity or possibly this other person could be the love of you life and you wouldn't know it...
Hi coach, wanna thank u guys for the awesome work you’re doing! Im in 1 month of NC, no begging no crying, she dumped me and i let her go and never talked again since the break up. She saw me for the first time in the gym ( im working out everyday and getting in the best shape of my life) and she cried, We havent talked, but i said Hi to her friend cuz she was checking me out for her (immature). She stayed outside the gym for another hour Talking to her friend and crying. We still follow each other on IG, i dont look at nothing, she does and her friends too. I dont Watch her friends stories or liking post exc.. Im thinking that the relief stage is close to be Over, im doing great being single , im finding myself and ofc i Miss her sometimes but if she doesnt come back its ok i guess:) just wanted to understand why she cried.. she misses me? Memories? Just want advice in the comments guys thx :)
Obviously she misses you and was also hoping you’d be as miserable as her keep doing what you’re doing she’ll cry even more if you ever go to the gym with someone else
@@roothelegend182 in my defense that say i was looking pretty damn good and thick 😂 but i dont know her state of mind, i guess its Not my business anymore
@@PRIMOPRAIMO we live in a big world there’s others out there that could take your mind off of anything you’ve been dealing with lol the toughest part is hanging in there and being patient
@@roothelegend182 yes Thats for sure. Doing NC just for myself tbh, i dont wish nothing but it got me thinking a bit her reaction. She still has our photos on her profile, im Over thinking these shit and i know i shouldnt 😂 overall im in a good spot rn
I'm just starting the video but I'm convinced he won't come back and I'm fine with it. He's avoidant, used the stress of med school for keeping things from being serious, and I caught him in a lie at the end. While I admittedly miss him, I'll be damned if I wait around for him. I'm in a PhD program, I have my own work to get through so I'm not going to waste time to mope. However, this is the 4th avoidant in a row I've ended up dating, so I have to ask; Why do I keep investing into these types of partners? Could you do a video, or point me to one where you discuss this?
@Nathalie B. According to some random online tests I took I'm securely attached, but looking back at my highschooler self I use to have anxious behaviors, but that was over 10 years ago. I use to say it's because I want someone driven in their careers like I am, but 2 of the 4 I last dated don't fit that criteria so I don't know what it is I find attractive about them. Edit: Actually you do raise an interesting point, I wasn't abandoned but I was left alone a lot in my childhood. I should explore that part of me.
@@pmdal Nah I'm always the one that cuts it off when they can't meet my needs, and I give myself time to reflect to make sure I'm not being too hasty or anything. I always try to center myself and be as fair as possible.
@@sloanmagnum5009 I appreciate the input, but that way of thinking is dated. One of the craziest party girls I know got her PhD in neuroscience last year and just got engaged to her boyfriend of 3 years. That's not to say dating while pursuing such things is easy, but this isn't the 1950's. I can respect that people don't want to date while pursuing higher education, but I won't pretend that it's impossible, regardless of gender, regardless of age. In the context of my ex, he's 31 years old. He repeatedly said he wanted to find love at the start, but his previous dates just never felt right. It wasn't until about 2 months in that he went cold because he said he could bring me home to his mom. Once he realized what he said, he pulled back from me both literally in that moment as well as emotionally going forward. His struggle is that he's an avoidant, not that he's a man.
There was a post from coach Craig. It was a success story of this girl who’s ex came back after 45 days or something like that. I can’t seem to find it. Anyone know what it’s called?
I had the same experience with a few girls after my ex left. One of them is in a relationship! Some advice: if you loved your partner the right way…just know that people were watching! You have been creating attraction from others during your relationship and when it’s over, those people are going to chase you! Though I want my ex back, it’s still nice knowing in case she doesn’t return. It’s also nice to know I still got it. Lol
I've been doing the work everyday for 2 years and I still messed up when I got an unintentional reach out from them so. But even though I messed up at least I can still see my Improvement even if that person will never see me as a good person.
I have no idea what’s happening with my ex, been almost five months. She was in a rebound but that didn’t work out but kept talking to me about how she misses him, I had enough Boxing Day and said I don’t want to hear about him as I’m sitting here on Christmas Day feeling crap because I miss her and her family but he doesn’t want you, so she told me ok then we don’t have anything to talk about then blocked me. I’m now unblocked but haven’t heard anything but I’m going back into NC is this the right? I’m still trying to focus on myself but finding it really difficult
Yes please do NC. If you keep talking to her she will just keep talking about other guys and make you feel awful or just see you as friend. NC will show her you respect yourself, not letting her using you anymore, and that will create attraction
@@musicandart9711 been almost 9 months now, she came and got her stuff 2 months ago after leaving it 7 months. Said she’d message but no message, I’m now unfollowed and unfriended for the second time but I’m still in NC don’t really see how this causes attraction
Our 1st pause was 4 months. Our 2nd pause lasted 16 months and he did come back. Both times after NC. For a year and a half. Then left again 2.5 weeks ago. I give up! But have to work on me because clearly this is a pattern that I never ever want ever again.
and the more the avoidant sticks strictly to no contact.. the greater the odds are that they ARE still interested. they're so interested in fact, that it scares them 😁🥳 so go and enjoy your life
I understand where Gina Torres is coming from . I am biracial also but I identify as black but I also know that I also have a few other races of people in me to and I don't deny them . When I feel out those box's I check them all but maybe 1 box . Miss . Linda ❤
Been separated from my X for 6 years now we was together for 27 years don't really communicate occasional text she didn't text me for my birthday in January don't think she has any one else but could have is there hope I don't think there is
That is my fear with the ex who left me. We were together 2 and a half years and it ended really badly plus now I have moved to Italy whereas she stayed in the UK with her kids from earlier marriage.
If they did come back and you have replied right away ( like 5mins) after no contact, and they didn’t respond because you were needy and over excited. Would they come back or is it solidified at that point 😂🤷🏽♀️
Some people hold on to an idea too long. How can a bond with an EX serve you for the future? Maybe if you need to exchange kids every month or they're really rich and giving.
Please take a moment to subscribe to the channel 💪
At some point you have to chose self love and self respect. You may want your ex back to continue to give your unconditional love end of the day unconditional love doesn’t mean unconditional tolerance.
almost 9 months in, stay strong guys :)
Almost 8 months in. Stay strong!
So much of my situation mirrors exactly what's discussed on this site. An ex contacted me after 2 years. This was a 'cold case'; he'd been cold towards me.
He talks about how he's learned valuable lessons. I hope he has for his own sake. I'm learning from this experience too. Both of us need lots of growth.
So grateful for this channel and its counsel. It's kept me sane and helped mend my ❤.
Take heart, everyone!
Almost a year in, in a week. It's amazing how far and lost as I was a year ago. Things have gotten better but it's been a loooong road. Keep your head up and keep trucking.
Good for you man
My ex left me about 9 months ago after being together for about 6 months. Our bond was so strong but I messed up.. I would’ve been blocked if it wasn’t for our financial ties. In the beginning I did beg and all that crap but i eventually backed off and thought she was starting to come around because there was some indirect direct reachs from her but i just found out she might go live with her ex from before me in another state. I know she still has feelings for me but she’s scared and stubborn. As painful as it is I’m still going to do the work and if she decides to give me a chance then it’ll all be thanks to you coach! If she doesn’t I know I’ll still be a better me. But part of me still wants to hold on to the possibility of us reconciling but I know she needs time sometimes that’s the only thing that’ll help a person heal. Hopefully someday soon I can book a coaching session with you because I really need it.
Don't waste your life away waiting for someone else to come back to you.
Don't rob yourself of an opportunity or possibly this other person could be the love of you life and you wouldn't know it...
The timing of this video couldn't be more perfect. Thank you Coach Craig and Victoria for your hard work as always 🤞🏼🙏🏽
Hi coach, wanna thank u guys for the awesome work you’re doing! Im in 1 month of NC, no begging no crying, she dumped me and i let her go and never talked again since the break up. She saw me for the first time in the gym ( im working out everyday and getting in the best shape of my life) and she cried, We havent talked, but i said Hi to her friend cuz she was checking me out for her (immature). She stayed outside the gym for another hour Talking to her friend and crying. We still follow each other on IG, i dont look at nothing, she does and her friends too. I dont Watch her friends stories or liking post exc..
Im thinking that the relief stage is close to be Over, im doing great being single , im finding myself and ofc i Miss her sometimes but if she doesnt come back its ok i guess:) just wanted to understand why she cried.. she misses me? Memories? Just want advice in the comments guys thx :)
Obviously she misses you and was also hoping you’d be as miserable as her keep doing what you’re doing she’ll cry even more if you ever go to the gym with someone else
@@roothelegend182 in my defense that say i was looking pretty damn good and thick 😂 but i dont know her state of mind, i guess its Not my business anymore
Day*
@@PRIMOPRAIMO we live in a big world there’s others out there that could take your mind off of anything you’ve been dealing with lol the toughest part is hanging in there and being patient
@@roothelegend182 yes Thats for sure. Doing NC just for myself tbh, i dont wish nothing but it got me thinking a bit her reaction. She still has our photos on her profile, im Over thinking these shit and i know i shouldnt 😂 overall im in a good spot rn
He's with somone else. But says he wants me back. But he's not making any moves. Been together 10 years
My ex cheated on me. No thank you.
I'm just starting the video but I'm convinced he won't come back and I'm fine with it. He's avoidant, used the stress of med school for keeping things from being serious, and I caught him in a lie at the end. While I admittedly miss him, I'll be damned if I wait around for him. I'm in a PhD program, I have my own work to get through so I'm not going to waste time to mope. However, this is the 4th avoidant in a row I've ended up dating, so I have to ask; Why do I keep investing into these types of partners? Could you do a video, or point me to one where you discuss this?
Did you suffer from abandon in your early age? Or do you have an anxious attachment style?
@Nathalie B. According to some random online tests I took I'm securely attached, but looking back at my highschooler self I use to have anxious behaviors, but that was over 10 years ago. I use to say it's because I want someone driven in their careers like I am, but 2 of the 4 I last dated don't fit that criteria so I don't know what it is I find attractive about them.
Edit: Actually you do raise an interesting point, I wasn't abandoned but I was left alone a lot in my childhood. I should explore that part of me.
@@greenstatic9286 you are anxious like me
@@pmdal Nah I'm always the one that cuts it off when they can't meet my needs, and I give myself time to reflect to make sure I'm not being too hasty or anything. I always try to center myself and be as fair as possible.
@@sloanmagnum5009 I appreciate the input, but that way of thinking is dated. One of the craziest party girls I know got her PhD in neuroscience last year and just got engaged to her boyfriend of 3 years. That's not to say dating while pursuing such things is easy, but this isn't the 1950's. I can respect that people don't want to date while pursuing higher education, but I won't pretend that it's impossible, regardless of gender, regardless of age.
In the context of my ex, he's 31 years old. He repeatedly said he wanted to find love at the start, but his previous dates just never felt right. It wasn't until about 2 months in that he went cold because he said he could bring me home to his mom. Once he realized what he said, he pulled back from me both literally in that moment as well as emotionally going forward. His struggle is that he's an avoidant, not that he's a man.
There was a post from coach Craig. It was a success story of this girl who’s ex came back after 45 days or something like that. I can’t seem to find it. Anyone know what it’s called?
I had the same experience with a few girls after my ex left. One of them is in a relationship!
Some advice: if you loved your partner the right way…just know that people were watching! You have been creating attraction from others during your relationship and when it’s over, those people are going to chase you!
Though I want my ex back, it’s still nice knowing in case she doesn’t return. It’s also nice to know I still got it. Lol
I've been doing the work everyday for 2 years and I still messed up when I got an unintentional reach out from them so. But even though I messed up at least I can still see my Improvement even if that person will never see me as a good person.
I have no idea what’s happening with my ex, been almost five months. She was in a rebound but that didn’t work out but kept talking to me about how she misses him, I had enough Boxing Day and said I don’t want to hear about him as I’m sitting here on Christmas Day feeling crap because I miss her and her family but he doesn’t want you, so she told me ok then we don’t have anything to talk about then blocked me. I’m now unblocked but haven’t heard anything but I’m going back into NC is this the right? I’m still trying to focus on myself but finding it really difficult
Yes please do NC. If you keep talking to her she will just keep talking about other guys and make you feel awful or just see you as friend. NC will show her you respect yourself, not letting her using you anymore, and that will create attraction
@@musicandart9711 been almost 9 months now, she came and got her stuff 2 months ago after leaving it 7 months. Said she’d message but no message, I’m now unfollowed and unfriended for the second time but I’m still in NC don’t really see how this causes attraction
All the laughs and some great advice! You guys crack me up!! Thank you!
Our 1st pause was 4 months. Our 2nd pause lasted 16 months and he did come back. Both times after NC. For a year and a half. Then left again 2.5 weeks ago.
I give up! But have to work on me because clearly this is a pattern that I never ever want ever again.
and the more the avoidant sticks strictly to no contact.. the greater the odds are that they ARE still interested. they're so interested in fact, that it scares them 😁🥳 so go and enjoy your life
U guys rock! Love U both! ❤️ Am missing our dear Margaret! 😢
Those of us old school miss her. 😢 I went through a painful break up in 2017 that still resonates today 6 years later.
Am missing?
True
To my fellow men if you want a little bit of levity in your situation and a good laugh in hindsight:
ruclips.net/video/klYtT4fabQA/видео.html
I’ve made soooo many mistakes. Like all of them, multiple times.
What’s the actual book title & author? Google just gives Star Wars references to ‘Disturbance in the Force.’
I understand where Gina Torres is coming from . I am biracial also but I identify as black but I also know that I also have a few other races of people in me to and I don't deny them . When I feel out those box's I check them all but maybe 1 box . Miss . Linda ❤
I’m reading disorganized people mirror your actions, cuz they don’t want to take that leap
Coach Craig aging backwards over here…
Thanks! I’ve been doing intermittent fasting 🙌❤️
Yes handsome Italian 😍 💪🤵
I’d like to see a live podcast with a few other coaches, not the woo woo ones but one or two who are similar to Craig, Margaret and Victoria.
There are none similar to us 🤣
@@CoachCraigKenneth What about Rory from The Love Chat?
I lost mines. She not coming back. Sometimes they don’t come and it’s okay
4 Months ago he started silent treatment. He has not heard of me ever since. So I basically walked away. Will I hear from him in this case?
Not true I had someone try to come back 6 years later I said no thanks but you never know I wouldn't wait around
@@sloanmagnum5009 That's not necessarily true
Did your ex ever reach out to you??
Been separated from my X for 6 years now we was together for 27 years don't really communicate occasional text she didn't text me for my birthday in January don't think she has any one else but could have is there hope I don't think there is
@2:48 Coach's ex contacted after 50 years? Not 15 years? Did I hear that right?
50 years. Not my ex. I’m not even 50 😂. I did a video on it. Search 50 on the channel
That is my fear with the ex who left me. We were together 2 and a half years and it ended really badly plus now I have moved to Italy whereas she stayed in the UK with her kids from earlier marriage.
If they did come back and you have replied right away ( like 5mins) after no contact, and they didn’t respond because you were needy and over excited. Would they come back or is it solidified at that point 😂🤷🏽♀️
So an unknown caller might be an ex then? Hmmmm
If that girl texted him out of the blue, she’s probably an avoidant lol.
Haha, that sounds like my ex, she did this to me with another guy!
Some people hold on to an idea too long. How can a bond with an EX serve you for the future? Maybe if you need to exchange kids every month or they're really rich and giving.
Good morning coaches!
He says he won't contact me again..? 🤔🤔
Feelings can change- you never know
First