Why "Do What You Love" Is Terrible Advice
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- Опубликовано: 14 окт 2024
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57 year old ER doctor. Like so many of my colleagues, I pursued medicine because of my passion for science, medicine, fascination about the human body, and wanting to help my fellow humans. Fast forward 20 years, and like all of my colleagues, I am pretty miserable. Medicine is not what it used to be and it has become such a miserable, high pressure grind. When I walk out of the hospital, the last thing I want to do is read about medicine, disease, etc. And 20 years of working on the front lines of our society in the ER has, well, frankly tarnished my love of my fellow humans. Nowadays, I look forward to my precious alone time and the time I have to immerse myself in my hobbies like language learning, fitness, guitar, and quiet time with my beloved dog. But at least it does pay well and I will be able to retire comfortably in a few more years. Thanks Nicole…great video and great topic. You nailed it.
As a cancer patient, I'm so sorry that enough of us are Karens that we make your days miserable. Please accept my appreciation for your work, even if we never meet. I'm still on the planet because of an urgent care visit with a skilled nurse practitioner, and because of the care and skill of so many others. Thank you for your care and support.
Same sentiments here. My original plan was to become a physician, for the same reasons you did. That did not happen for various reasons, and for a long time I wondered if I did the right thing walking away from that plan. I have been an RN for the last 20 years, and I feel just as you do. I am now glad I did not spend all the time and money it would have taken to become a doctor, because I am planning to retire within the next few months. The healthcare system in the US is broken.
@@mapratt Those are very kind and thoughtful words. I work in oncology. I am glad that your experience with the health care system was positive, and I hope it continues to be so. I wish you all the best.
@@iamjane9628 Great comment. Totally agree that the U.S. healthcare system is broken. I guess I should have also mentioned that all the nurses I work with in the ER are also burned out and miserable. Wishing you all the best. Enjoy your retirement. You’ve earned it.
My dad was a doctor and I talked my son out of applying for med school and I don’t regret it.
“Do what lets you have the life you want.”
Being retired and doing absolutely nothing all day is completely BETTER than the best day I ever had when working.
So true...to bad some don't understand this!
@@karryhuston1321 🎯👏👏👏💯
That's the dream to do nothing or something you want without having to work. No amount of free food, great benefits, pool tables, "family" culture, raises and bonus every year will override waking up by alarm clock, commuting, faking a smile, leaving your family and friends all day, and putting gas in your car to drive to place you never wanted to go to.
@@karryhuston1321 🎯👏👏👏💯
Me too!!!
I just finished rereading Scott Galloway's book,The Algebra of Wealth. In there he says something along the lines of "don’t follow your passion follow your talent. Save your passion is for the weekends."
Yet talent isn't really a thing either. All skills are learned through effort and tons of time put into it. Like anyone can be a great site reader on the piano, but only if they sit down for 15 to 20 minutes everyday for two or three years, sight reading music they don't know at the correct level they can almost handle, slightly increasing the difficulty as they go. Then they can sight read most anything you set before them and it becomes a "talent".
@@Tony1771-yj8mc For the most part people define talent as an ability someone is good at independently of their effort or desire.
You are so right. I’m 72 and I’ve been a seamstress/tailor for over 50 years. I learn over the years NOT tell people about my skill. I tried to turn it into a business for about a year, I hated it. So I took it back to my hobby and restored my passion for it.
The three things I love the most are Music, Technology & Teaching. My first job was as a bellboy in a hotel. It was good money, but after almost two years it came to my mind that I wouldn't like to get old doing that. So I got me a teaching job at a school (making half the money). After two more years I decided to become a professional musician and I did that for twenty years. I made good money, but things started to change after the turn of the century, so I decided to got back to teaching. After 12 years teaching full time in a university I was laid off. Music wasn't an alternative, so after looking for a job for one week I decided to become a freelance computer technician and that's what I've been doing for the last 10 years. I work at home, own my time, make good money and play with two bands now as a hobby. Life has been good to me and I've reinvented myself whenever it was necessary, but always doing what I like :)
I was 51 and my marriage was horrible. I saw an advert for zombies at the local theme park, I applied and got the job and also retrained as a teacher. Now I work self employed and part time, I work as a tour guide, a host and as a standup comedian. My days can full of nothing or everything but rarely boring. I don’t have much money but time is worth more.
Seems like you're living a more fulfilling life now, at 48 I'm still looking for mine.... I really like stand up comedy but I don't think I'm funny/entertaining enough to do a routine, do you have a system to put together a stand up?
nice
This is the most important video I've seen in a long time. This is so spot on! This happened to me with my yoga studio. After 15 years of entrepreneurship, I no longer want anything to do with yoga, even though I have to pay the bills. Yoga is also a lifestyle from which you derive your identity. But I'm not that, i am not a "yogi". And I also found myself in a crisis. That lasted for years. Because I had imposed on myself that I should still have yoga as a passion. Indeed, I always felt guilty and thought I wasn't good enough. A job is just a job and now I run my yoga studio because I depend on it. In my spare time I want to do completely different things. I'm still looking for things that make me happy. I hardly know what makes me happy anymore, but it's certainly not yoga. Business is business. And a hobby, lifestyle or passion is something that makes you happy. And make a separation between the two. With this video you have explained what has been bothering me in recent years. You made it so clear that it feels like a huge insight to me. All guilt and shame falls away. Thank you for this life changer.
🫶🏼
I knew I wasn't college material by middle school. So, I went to a "technical" high school. Electronics shop was 1/2 day every day for 3 years. I went straight from there to the phone company. As a side hustle I rented a small sound system to bands on the weekends. I was making more $$$ in one night than I was at my day job. I left my job and started installing sound systems in churches. That morphed into doing maintenance in recording studios. That eventually morphed into doing commercial and residential security systems. After 20 years of that I sold that business. I worked for 3 years as a communications tech for the CN. Left that, moved to a new town and was a remodeling contractor for 10 years. So, yeah just follow your nose. I never made a ton of money, but had I been a better businessman, it was possible. I was always in high demand. Now retired and thinking about being a home inspector.🤔 With the exception of a few years, always self employed.
And I bet you enjoyed what you did for a living. Home inspector sound interesting.
And remember- every frozen corpse on Everest started out as a highly motivated individual.
Sorry, but that is not a good example. Every mountaineer climbing the Everest knows about the dangers he’s facing on the way to the summit. The Everest is very dangerous and if you’re not ok with taking the risk of not coming back, then you’ve got nothing whatsoever to search for on pretty much every single one of the 14 highest mountains of this planet.
@@mwernli2886Everest has also become about the ego, the self and that if you have a near bottomless pit of funds (compared to most of us) You pay to get several Sherpas to risk there lives to almost literally carry you to the top.. Case in point, the unprecedented traffic jam of climbers as of late.
@@yoohoo909 I know about that. And yes, for most people it’s probably about the ego. However, even if you literally get carried to the summit and don’t have to climb one meter on your own, you still can‘t be sure to ever leave the Everest again. There’s just no guarantee to survive this tour. So, even if I had the money to afford an entire army of sherpas, I would never ever ever do that.
Whenever I see Northface backpacks it reminds me of entitled bratty rich kids.
I stumbled across a you tube channel the other day where a lady has boxes and boxes of hand sewn pieces because she closed her Etsy shop at its peak because her love of sewing was dying once she had the obligation to buyers. She then sold some specialty baking goods and immediately lost joy in Baking, so she stopped. She now refuses to monetize her joys in life now.
When I started working I knew a colleague who always said at work: ‘my dream is to not have to work, and spend time with my family’. I was young, she was in her 50s. I didn’t understand what she meant and Id think “what about contributing to society?” Little did I know, you contribute to society in many more ways than through your job. Loving your family, raising healthy and confident kids, being light among your friends… now I know what she meant. One’s job should not be one’s main goal in life.
Good video. True! I loved working on cars in the 1960s. When I graduated from high school, I went to work for a Mercury Dealership. It was a good job but, when I looked at the 50 and 60 year olds that I worked with, they were miserable. I decided to go to the local university branch and study engineering. Eventualy, I graduated and worked as an engineer, which I enjoyed. Especially when I got to design and build bridges. I kept working on cars as a hobby which saved me a lot of money. Now, retired, I still work on cars and have expanded into tractors. Good Luck, Rick
Nicole - you are one of the most thoughtful, bright, interesting and genuine RUclips’ers I’ve come across. I’m 52 years old and a burnt out chef. I’ve hated my job for years. I’ve decided to rent out my condo in the United States and move to Vietnam. It’s like a semi - retirement of sorts. However, it’s distinctly clear to me that I will definitely need some structure when I’m there. As lovely as it sounds to lay on the beach all day and eat Pho, I know that’ll wear thin sooner than later. I personally feel like I’m going to need to keep active for my mental health. 🙏
You are 100% correct !!!
I love the fact that you are no bullshit !!
Not everybody is grown up enough to realize what you are saying is the truth.
❤👍🏼😊
I think you're spot on with this one. It also highlights the importance of pursuing financial independence, so in the case where you're only tolerating your job you can be free of it sooner rather than later and be able to choose to change to a lower paying job that may offer more time off, quit work altogether, or anything else you may want to try.
Thank you for being honest and providing the truth that schools refuse to tell their students
I am a software engineer and my hobby is woodworking. My hobby used to be computer programming until that became my job. I met someone at a commercial woodworking shop where I would buy exotic offcuts of wood for projects and got chatting to the guy. He told my he hates woodworking because of all the reasons you described in your video and his hobby was programming and data analysis (pretty much the same as my job). We were like mirror images of each other. He would go home and program, I would look forward to woodworking after hours.
Needed side gigs after a divorce to keep my house. Did that for over 5 years. Then just this summer had the brainwave to trade in the job that I love and all my side gigs for a job that I probably won’t love but won’t need side gigs. Made the change and now have one job and time for my favorite hobby. Miss the job I loved but this is more sustainable.
I think it’s a balancing act. I used to volunteer at the place I work at now, meaning I get paid for work I used to do for free. Working for a nonprofit doesn’t pay a lot of money, but my needs are pretty simple and I don’t dread getting up on Monday mornings.
So much to be said for not dreading Monday mornings. To me that's basically what it means to "do what you love". Tomorrow I'll return to work after 10 days of fun vacation. What I love most would be hiking and drawing and putting together outfits. I don't do that at my job lol. I will be handling accounts and logistics and other things that are my responsibility. But I won't go home in tears and I'll laugh and smile during my day. That means a lot.
I was raised in a "practical" family, and chose a career (many years ago) that would sustain me, but not drain me. I have held this job for many years, although I'm sure it seems boring to some people. I've even turned down promotion opportunities in order not to increase my work responsibility. Therefore, I have bandwidth at the end of the day to dedicate to what I love (my dog, yoga, reading, listening to music, and watching classic movies). I have never regretted the choice that I made long ago.
I taught yoga and it made me absolutely hate it. I’ve heard about huge movie buffs who work at the cinema and start hating movies. It loses the magic.
Playing hockey and ice skating are my hobbies, so I will tread very lightly on them to not make them feel like work. I’ll never work at the rink unless they hire me to be their lawyer.
Because I’m a good writer and enjoy civics/criminal justice/political science, being an attorney makes the most sense to me for a job.
I'm in the same position. As a yoga entrepreneur, in 15 years I have come to hate yoga and the entire yoga world. Unfortunately I depend on it and I now run my yoga studio as a business with other freelancers teaching the classes. it's a yoga burn out and in my spare time I enjoy fitness and walking.
Feedback
I was one of the lucky ones. I was a Flight Attendant for 30 years and I LOVED IT! I retired “early” at 57, because I didn’t want to get burned out and quit because I hated my job. It provided me with a ton of free time (to travel the world) and I was also able to fund my 401k AND pay off my house. I have many friends in their 60’s and 70’s that “can’t” retire, because they don’t want to lose their identity as a Flight Attendant or they just can’t afford to leave.
If I could work 8 hours a day working for myself with my hobbies and make the same amount of money at my current job, I would do it hands down. Working from home, saving money and being with my dog are worth losing passion for a hobby. I can find other hobbies for enjoyment. Losing some passion for a hobby vs. working for the man is 100% worth it. That said, my goal is to stick it out at the job and use my talents and hobbies as side hustles to pay down debt. Sheeran's net worth is $200 million, he could stop at any time and be set for life many times over so he must still have love for what he does. Happiness is an inside job, but you have to work at it. Love your videos. I came across your channel a week ago and I'm a fan.
I remember going to a job fair in my high school gym and considering all these different paths. But then I looked at the pay comparison and found I had to cut a lot of options from my list. I realized back then that I needed to start with a job that would sustain me, and reversed out what my options were and further divided out what actually interested me.
While I agree in some points, there is some nuance to it. Life's too short to do anything that makes you miserable, even if it pays you well.
Also, your hobbies can change as everything does in life. So, not pursuing a job in something you like for the fear of "ruining" it, seems to get you to the same place, but at a different pace.
Overall I think the sweet spot lies in keeping a balance on how your job does not make your life worse vs how much you can afford with it and what lifestyle it allows you to have. I think if you enjoy what you do, you can be better than others and can find better positions, so it tends to be better to be in that end of the scale than not.
I didn't do what I loved, and pursued something sensible instead: I'm still miserable.
Probably depends on the person rather than a hard and fast rule.
I was really into art as a kid and teen, and people encouraged me to become an artist. After 1 month of being an art major in college I switched to something more general and broad and have never regretted that. I am so glad I didn't do art for a career, for many reasons. I genuinely like my job and in a sense I'd say I do what I love. But not my passion, if that makes sense. The type of environment I work in and the work I do is certainly not fun or exciting, but it's pleasant and very tolerable. In that way I feel that I am doing what I love. I am involved in a few different areas of the business where I work and it's satisfying to fill those roles. I am rarely too stressed or overwhelmed and I have a pretty large amount of control over my activities and their outcomes. I sometimes notice people working in jobs I would 100% hate like being a nurse or teacher. At those times I feel I'm doing what I love even though it's not "a fun job".
I'm 57 and digging ditches is what I've come to love. I also adore cleaning and polishing sinks and toilets toilets
Disappearing dog at 0:41 😮
The problem is health insurance, if you’re an American. Everything that every non-American like you, Nicole, says about employment sort of goes down the tubes if you’re an American and have to work for The Man for the health insurance. The first moment in my life when i really felt free was when i qualified for Medicare.
In the USA, if you look at where most people traditionally start businesses is age 65... When you can get social security and medicare... In other words, when you can afford to take some kind of risk without fearing the loss of your health coverage or some kind of income, no matter meager it might be. This is a backwards way of living, and one that most foreigners outside the USA who want to move here don't realize until its too late.
Underground diesel mechanic in Northern Ontario here I love it I would not change it for anything. It is not always sunshine and rainbows. It is tough Underground Underground but it is worth it. I drive a junk car because it breaks my heart paying 40k for a new average suv and it being rotted out in 10 years. I would rather save the money
Thissss! I’ve spent the last 10 years making videos about Pokemon and making a living doing it.
Therapy was invaluable for me in dealing with that ball of “Who am I without the job I’ve fought so hard for and that everyone else would love to have”
I’ve taken a year long break from my main channel this year and have such a healthier relationship to it all now and ofc plenty of outside hobbies
Thanks for this video
Even doing nothing gets tiring.
😂
Eating fatigues me, and sleeping makes me hungry. I'm in quite the predicament 😮
🤣
TOTALLY !!!
Doing nothing rarely needs to be tiring, if you have at least one hobby that really interests you to lift yourself out of the doldrums.
More wisdom from you Nicole! This also applies to moving to that fabulous place you once visited and desperately wanted to move there. I’ve done this,and it had exactly the opposite effect,once the first month was passed. I moved away. Thanks and regards from England.❤️🇬🇧🇺🇸
48/yo man here. Wow, so much I relate to in this video! When i was just out of college, I decided to go into fixing cars professionally. It turned out that I just really didn't have the talent to be able to keep up with that world, so I washed out after only a year in the field. Like you said, it broke my heart like no other. I had been SO happy to define myself by having that noble blue-collar job, but then in a flash it was gone. Who was I now? I got an office job after that, and ended up caring way too much about what I was in charge of. It was a source of pride, but endlessly frustrating! I wash dishes now.
Not sure if this relates to my food truck. I have always had a love affair with it but never saw myself as burned out. It's one of the only things that esses my mind and the fact that I can do everything alone with no help turns me on even more. I chose the business 14 years ago without knowing a lot about it. I don't know what I would do without it
Finding something that keeps you interested but doesnt destroy a passion you have in process... Always easier said than done! Im a maintenance mechanic in a plastics factory, It keeps me focused and interested because i enjoy repairing things but it doesnt destroy my love for cars and motorcycles which is what my passion is... It took 10 years to find this balance but it definitely makes a big difference!
I could have really used this video as a teenager!
I fell into a depression back then because of all the fears about the future, which of course also had to do with my uncertain working life. I was told to choose a job that I would like to do, but there was nothing. My whole future was a black hole because of it!
Today I am happy in a job that I was talked out of back then during an internship. The employees hated their jobs, the money was too little for them (in the company in question, the people were overpaid!) and so on. The reason for my satisfaction is not that the job is fun, but that I am only there for 8 hours and then have 5 hours free time, as well as the whole weekend.
I do what I love and disagree. It's been my job since 1993. I'm a computer programmer.
How I've kept it fun is to separate the work part of my hobby from the hobby part of my hobby. Not going to lie, the programming I do for work with deadlines and requirements that I disagree with is not always fun and can be quite stressful.
I also program hobby programs for fun and not profit. These projects have no deadlines and are just what I want to do. For some reason I don't have the feeling, "This is what I do for work, it's the last thing I want to do after work". I've always thought that this is because "I" really do what I love and those who say "they" started to hate what they love when it became their job, just thought it's what they loved but they didn't really love it.
This has caused contention at work when managers from time to time scold me for programming my time off. That sometimes happened when I work on personal projects on work systems. I've done that in the past because I work on the mainframe and didn't have a system close enough at home for personal mainframe projects. So lately, I do all of my fun projects on systems I own, which mostly solved that problem.
Nicole, you are wise beyond your years. That's why I enjoy your videos. When I was a kid taking guitar lessons I really wanted to get an electric guitar and play in a band. Well, by the time I was 15 I was a unionized working musician playing most weekends in a hard rock band. I was quite good for someone my age and got a lot of attention. Trouble was, I came to find that I wasn't that fond of rock 'n roll music, or guitar band-type music generally. As years went on I was playing anywhere I could to make a few bucks and by the time I was 28 I was sick of it, quit the band I was in at the time and never played for money again. I got a master's degree and made decent money for years and now I do what I want. A lot of people dream about what it would be like to play in a band for packed rooms but for me it had become like pushing a broom. After that I didn't play at all for years, but recently I bought a classical guitar and now I noodle around on it every day and it's fun again. No monetary objectives--kind of like starting over. But this is exactly what you describe: Having to try to make money at something I once enjoyed doing completely destroyed it for me. Trying to make a living in a fun and creative field can often--but not always--be a mirage.
This idea about loving your job is really prevalent, but I never really bought into it. I didn't know what I wanted to study out of school - I chose tourism for college but it was all wrong, then I studied art for a year - so I figured getting any job would help me choose a direction. I found a job (records management) that gave me a career of 17 years. I was pretty good at it and I never went hungry. and I even lived overseas doing the same job for a while. I knew I wanted a change at that point and I managed to move sideways into learning and development. I now work as an instructional designer on eLearning projects for a global corporation. I enjoy it as there are creative aspects and like you Nicole, I'm also a musician, as well as enjoying fibre arts and sewing. I sometimes think about if I had more courage to try for a creative job straight after school (parents always told me to be sensible) and if I would have made it in music or art. But I am glad it turned out this way. I now get to pay for studio recording time and tuition for my own music without the pressure of producing something to pay the bills. I also had to go through a fair bit of letting go and detaching my identity from my job in the past 5 years. I think the emotional state you mention is really important to acknowledge. It's very freeing to step back and care a little less about the kind of work you do and what it says about you. Your job is not your worth or your identity. Its just how you fund your life.
I was lucky enough to have my passion (IT/computers) turn into my career. I don’t regret this at all. I think it gave me the edge to be often better than my colleagues and to tolerate the bad things about the profession. What I have noticed though is that as I get older, I have gravitated more to non IT hobbies such as language learning and reading which allow me to disconnect and get away from computers. Thanks again for another thought provoking video Nicole.
Somewhat same here, I love all kinds of machines, I try to learn programming on the side.
I have often thought about that. The easiest comparison is with professional athletes. People often comment that they shouldn’t complain about their job because they’re paid millions to play the sport they love and it is completely true. But at some point I am sure that for most of them it becomes a chore and the pressure to perform is so great that it takes away the fun that they once had playing.
Totally. I don’t know much about sports, but common sense would tell me that if they don’t play consistently well they’ll be dropped. That’s a ton of pressure.
It is shocking that adults are paid to play with balls ... or that people spend their time watching grown people playing with their balls ...
There are record collecting channels where they have stores and are burned out on the fun of records. They started as simple collectors but turned it into a business and have every super rare record but are still unhappy.
You can set up doing what interests and fascinates you but you will end up doing what customers are prepared to pay for.
bingo.
also, missing the mindset of the upper echelon/staffing who will use your passion, wirk ethic, etc to squeeze every little bit out of you for as little as possible.
Nichole, As a 60 year old male I really wish you had been my careers adviser in high school. So much sound advice...I salute and thank you
This video hits hard.
I turned one hobby into a business. About 10 years later, my love for the hobby was destroyed and it took me more than 8 years to get back to it at all. When I got into another hobby (photography), I swore never to make it a business. And I haven't, and I still like it.
Business writing is the intersection of what I do well (writing/language) and what I can monetize and tolerate. However, with the job market over the past several years, the increase in the use of AI, and race-to-the-bottom in hourly/salaries have made it a real challenge, and now I've wound up sort of at that "I've been a writer all my life...and now what?" part of my life.
But when I've got work, it allows me to buy all the camera gear I want.
I was a huge comic book nerd in high school and I started teaching myself how to draw superheroes pretty early on. Eventually I got the idea that I wanted to draw comics as a career and maybe I'd be the next great Spider-Man or Hulk artist. Many years went by and I continued to hone my drawing skills and I eventually got good enough that a few people approached me to do commissions and I even got one job drawing a comic for an independent publisher in Canada (I live in the US).
What I didn't anticipate is that, over the years (including over a decade in the military), drawing had become my primary hobby and my most effective escape from the stresses of everyday life. So, when drawing started to become my job, I could no longer just draw whatever I wanted because I had deadlines to meet and suddenly I found that my primary method of relaxation and decompressing was just gone with nothing to replace it. That led to stress building up and artist's block setting in. Soon, not only could I not draw what I wanted, I couldn't draw what I had already been paid to draw. So I had to walk away from those jobs, or just churn something out regardless of how I felt about the quality to fulfill those obligations.
Now, I just work on my own ideas, stories, and characters as a hobby and I have a regular job to pay the bills. If my own comic book characters become successful enough that I can make a living just drawing them for the rest of my life, then I still think that would be nice. But I've given up on the notion that I could ever be happy only drawing other people's ideas for a living.
I disagree. I have been doing what I love for 35 years and it's awesome. 🎉❤
I love that for you.
Yeah, don't believe you.
Me, too. Out of curiosity, what do you do?
Yeah I'm an RN and I can't say I absolutely love it lol. But I'm glad I didn't continue to finish my BMus degree because it would've ripped the enjoyment of music from me. Now I can use my job to fund my love for music and enjoy my hobby instead of having to use it for work.
You're one of the fortunate few
Maybe I'm crazy. But I like looking for cool looking rocks. I'm turning into a rock hound, and I'm wanting to buy a rock tumbler. No money in it, but it's just fun.
The person who said "Do what you love and you'll never work a day in your life" propably overlooked the fact that 'Love' is a verb. Love is also something needing maintenance. So, there is no way around it. 'Love' involves 'work'.
Thanks for sharing your videos, visibly made both with Love and with work.
I can’t agree with you on this topic Nicole. I 38 years old and since my 4th year on this earth, I am obsessed with music. Nevertheless, I worked in an office for the first 5 years of my professional career. That meant I would come home to the thing I loved the most for only an hour or two before I had to go to sleep, in order to be able to get up in the morning and do the thing I began to dislike the longer the more. In the end it weighed so heavily on me, that one day I came home and burst into tears as soon as I opened the door.
Of course I had heard basically everything you said in that video, but I said to myself and to everyone else to who, I talked about that topic, that I was going to work in the music business and that I could never ever get as tired of music in my life as I got of my office job. And I was right.
I have never gotten tired of anything related to music, whether it‘s been composing, writing lyrics, creating foleys, playing instruments, or doing the recording, mixing or mastering of a song. And I would still work there, if the pandemic had not hit us all. So no: I don’t agree with you on that. As the late Nicolas G. Hayek once said, when he was asked if he ever got tired of the work, the business and his job, leading Swatch: „I’ve never even worked for half a second in my life. All I did was having fun.“
It should be "do what you are good at". In my case it is what I love as well. Suppose it's why I'm so good at it.
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Thanks, Nicole, for the fresh and interesting perspective. I’ve heard a lot of career advice in my 63 years, and this is among the best. I didn’t enjoy my career or find it especially meaningful, but it was dependable and provided me with the financial means to explore various interests and grow personally. It also laid the groundwork for an enjoyable retirement in which I’m able to focus on those hobbies that are most meaningful to me.
Some really good advice, Nicole. Not having a boss that you have to be obsequious and always be compliant towards can allow you to be an independent person that we all value. Self employment is a big plus.
Great Video Nicole! I am a guitar player and been in bands my whole life but the last band break up was such a bad experience that I stopped playing! I do drawing and art now for fun!
Fantastic video and I hope people heed the warning. I am also experienced with turning my passion into a hobby. Yes, I started hating my business as well. I am currently trying to close out my passion/hobby of 20 years and can't even bring myself to continue the business just long enough to close it out. Wish I would have figured this out years ago. I have cautioned others against turning their hobbies into businesses. A job should be a job. Your hobby should be your hobby. My mistake ruined the possibility of me loving my "passion" again. Lesson learned.
Though this isn't true for everyone, this was absolutely the case for me when I started doing Twitch streaming. It was fun at first and exciting but after a while I hated it. It made gaming feel like an absolute chore and all I could think about was "dear god I need to get out of this room and go for a walk!". I still game now but purely for myself.
I'm also trying to start onto the path of being a writer with hopefully the prospect of making some money out of it. Since this isn't a hobby I normally do, I'm hoping I won't experience burnout.
This is true. Elton John has said many times he rarely plays the piano at home. I currently have a boring admin office job and then I post to my blog when inspired and that's a bit of extra money coming in each month and scratches my creative itch.
Whe you get good at something useful, when you are justifiably well compensated, when you are recognised for your skill and being dependable - the passion for the work will come - no matter how unbearable the job may seem to outsides - this is why, for example, Tax Accountants aren't jumping off bridges all the time.
I am almost 40 years older than you. Thank you for your introspective thoughtfulness.Two thoughts. We humans are kind of odd. A teaspoon of salt tastes terrible, but a home cooked stew without it is also terrible. That day job needs to be rewarding financially and emotionally but should not be fun all the time. Plays and movies that have sad and happy are the ones we want to watch again. Secondly, jump into that day job with the mindset that it will be good and rewarding. I have never hated work. Hating work says more about you than the job.
I work as a machinist, and formerly worked as a scientist. I loved (past tense) both of these fields. I grew up watching Nova (a PBS show about science) and knew I wanted to be a scientist. Problem is, you can't live on a scientist's salary unless you are willing to compromise your soul to do industrial science, which is boring, repetitive, high pressure and corporate-directed. I also loved machining, as making stuff is pure love... But when you HAVE TO make things companies demand- often poorly thought-out things or things that are ultimately thrown away, it makes making those things a chore that nobody seems to care about, sapping any joy you might have gotten out of it. Listen to Nicole... DO NOT DO what you love as a job. Do what the world needs someone to do as a job (preferably one that has a higher salary) and do what you love exclusively on the side. If you make money doing what you love on the side, consider it a bonus and NEVER EVER rely on it or your hobby will become something you hate.
Excellent video! All of the “follow your passion “ gurus don’t tell that you need to change your passion to being passionate about making money.
So I LOVE playing video games. I can play all day long but a voice inside my head comes along that says "If you took that time to exercise you'd have a better body or If you took that time and did some overtime at work you wouldn't be in so much debt" and then all of the fun just goes away. Then I listen to this person and what she is saying isn't something I didn't think of myself, I just felt bad for thinking it. I should be working harder or I should be exercising to get a better body. I just wanna play video games. They calm me down and they are fun. I'm not bothering anybody and my debt is going to get paid off just doing the 40 hour week eventually...so yeah I beat myself up a lot after a joyous multi hour gaming session but now that I have seen this video maybe I won't do that to myself as much anymore.
I've always thought I'd love to sew for a living. Just make bespoke, one of a kind pieces whether it's a cushion cover or a pair of shorts and just sell what I make whenever I make it. I haven't done any of that because I just don't get the time to do it. My sister told me she'd be happy to be my salesperson if I ever decide to do that because she has a wide circle of friends and acquaintances so I doubt I would need a website. My plan was to spend 2-3 months initially just making tons of whatever I want to have an inventory and then have one day a month only where everything gets sold. Exclusivity plus. By word of mouth only.
All my sister's peeps would gather at her place once a month and go through the stuff they wanted and just give me money for it. Then the cycle would start again for the next month. It sounds like a good idea but I would have to stop working full time because the other days of the month when I'm not selling, I'd be sewing steadily to make inventory for the next month. The downside is that all the stuff might not get sold. Or they'd return stuff for their money back, or I might not be able to devote 8 hours a day, every day of the month to build up inventory again, or any number of other hiccups that I can't even think of right now.
I'll still eventually give it a go, but discussing it with my sister will be first priority. She knows her circle better than I do and if she thinks people will buy my stuff, then it might be worth exploring. Of course, I won't be giving up my day job any time soon, but it's a nice goal to work towards.
This is exactly what I have tried to tell my children. But like you (and like myself) sometimes it doesn’t click until you get a bit older.
There was so much truth in this video it actually got me to comment. It also has me contemplating creating a new game in the old 16 bit style that will run natively on all these retro emulator handhelds. We could literally use that as a "platform" and develop 16 bit "ish" games that run on its Linux OS just like the steam deck.
This relates to what Nicole was saying in this video,
Not long before Sir Isaac Newton died (yes the gravity guy) he bunged some really *REALLY* important papers in a drawer...and could not care less whether others could find them and moreover find them useful or not. Fortunately someone found them after he died, and accordingly...the world is much more enhanced because of his scientific knowledge than if the papers had simply been ignored...or just thrown away. My point being that the work he did meant so much to himself, and that in the end the views of others became meaningless and he only bothered with that which he could prove just to himself. He was not interested in accolades or fortunes.
Yep some things doesn’t pay the bills, though I love to take pictures as amateur photographer meaning they keep inviting me for the party with camera.lol however when I’m alone than I still have my harmonica to relax
I'm certain there is a point in everyone's life that they hate working. Even people who stream their personal enjoyments eventually loathe it. What's the reason? We hate duties. We hate being obligated to another. This is why I continued as an automation developer and didn't become a streamer. This is why whatever I do I prefer to do alone. Personality wise I'm a spider. A natural loner. That is my comfort zone. It's best to know yourself and what you actually need from this life so you don't ruin your life and potentially others as well. This also goes for what you do for a living. A lot of people will push the envelope of expectations until they have a mental breakdown. People who sign up for families and kids who eventually ditch them do this too.
I don't see a problem with monetizing your hobbies though. Just know that you will always be obligated to someone or some thing. You own a home so you know this. Even the material things eventually become obligations. This is probably where the minimalist comes in as most happy adult of the bunch.
I agree 10000000% this is absolutely correct and is what i try to get through to my daughters. Do something that makes you good money that you don’t absolutely hate, save, invest and use the money to enjoy your hobbies when you want to. Once it’s your job it becomes a chore!
I tried having success as a full time visual artist for 5 years. I was totally stressed out, didn't sell much and burned through my savings. I decided to find work that I would hate the least, went back to university for 4 years to achieve that goal. I worked after in that field for 9 years. It was challenging but I retired with a small pension. Now life is heaven. I wrote two books in the last year. I would like to see them published, but it's not a financial necessity. I would suggest to anyone to keep their lifestyle as frugal as possible, find the highest paying job while having a life outside of it and save money to retire as early as you can.
My partner loved his job. He was a heavy equipment operator. When he got early onset dementia and had to go on disability, he was crushed. His work was his identity because it was all he had. He went downhill quickly because he had no passion or hobby to fall back on.
Stop making a job or position your identity. Sorry for people who think that way even though I'm sorry to hear about your spouse.
@@Observer100-cn7gv I worked hard to make him see he was more than his job but he never did see my point. He wasn't very smart and he thought his only good trait was his work ethic. It's sad when people don't think they have any value besides work
Very sorry to hear this. Stay well.
I've been doing what I love for the past 15 years, I am my own boss, and I set my schedule. I feel almost as I am retired, I have so much free time. It's too bad I did not start doing this sooner in my life.
May I ask what that is? Thanks :)
We need to buy Nicole another sweater.
Why are you worried about what she wears? She has multiples of her favorites.
@@nanetten6238 Kidding, Nanette. All best.
I went to school for computer programming because I like video games and thought it would be cool to work on them. I'm glad I didn't end up working in the video game industry. It sounds like long hours of hell and would make me not want to play games any more. I ended up working in IT for a big company. It's not fun. I don't like it. But I am pretty good at it and I can tolerate it most days. That's probably the best I could have hoped for.
It sounds like I'm the only person who followed his passion and still love what I do. What I don't like is modern corporate culture. But the work I enjoy after many years.
Lol. I decided to go down the 'do what you love' route, and that's why I have several side hustles to pay the bills. 🤣 But boy have I learned a lot about frugal living. 👍
100% this. I’ve often said the same thing for years. Working in your hobbies kills all interest in your hobbies. It happens to me all the time. I deliberately don’t work in any of my hobbies because I don’t want to destroy my interests anymore.
It depends on the person. I monetized what I enjoy doing and I have been doing it for over a decade. I enjoy every day and look forward to owning a business that I love.
Thank you for another great video Nicole!
Thank you for another very good video. Somehow, it makes me think of something Bill Murray said once when he was talking about the trade-offs of his fame and fortune. He said something to the effect of how, instead of trying to be rich and famous, "Just get rich and see if that doesn't cover it." For me, I worked years in soul-crushing customer service-type jobs that left me too worn out to pursue any passions. But nowadays, I do pretty well doing general transcription gigs and flipping toys and various electronics items and sometimes clothes on eBay. Maybe I'll write a book that does well, too, whether it's fiction or non-fiction. It seems easier to do now.
One of the worst financial decision I made was starting a martial art business. Despite doing well pre-COVID, my Sensei used me and I stopped enjoying his classes. Everything seemed so draining.
I have other interests now. I won’t the cross the line and try to gain an income from my new interests. There’s a sense of freedom to say no - something that’s nearly impossible for my first passion.
This video hit hard. I wish I could go back knowing what I know now and being aware of how to turn something I love into a job without losing the passion for my hobbies and other things I love. That's not to say I don't have hobbies it's just to say how the lines are blurred sometimes. One of my jobs is working at home and setting boundaries was something I had to learn. I can't be available 24/7. and that is a hard one. I have put more emphasis on travel because "some day" isn't coming. so I'm diving in and it's been the best thing I could have done. I have to save and save and cut out a lot of things, travel very frugally, but it's totally worth it. I have learned that it's ok too take the time and my job will still be there. (within reason).As for that little voice in the back of my head telling me I could be (read should be) doing work, I'm working on silencing it. That is no small feat.
Your wisdom is invaluable and for someone so young, it's admirable for you to have discovered all of it. Even better, I'm grateful to you for sharing with us.
Only people who have a big inheritance or are taken care of financially can do whatever they want. The rest of us have to take any job we can to survive.
Man you said this so perfectly. This is exactly why I realized long ago that I didn't want Music to be my career for survival. Simply because it gives me so much mental Freedom & Peace. Now I'm partially retired (if there is such a thing), and music creating/production is still my favorite thing to do. It's like a private, or, personal gift. This to me is worth far more than money 😉
Nicole, I was never self employed. But I worked quite independently.
Either way, good video. Honest and full of insight.
Thanks for sharing.
I do paper crafts: journals, books, cards, etc. I had 5 craft fairs last year between October and December. I was so burnt out I didn’t do anything in my craft room for 5 months. I made a few hundred dollars (that I didn’t need to actually survive) and killed my joy of crafting. 😢 I’m now more into art journaling than making actual crafts. I only have 2 craft fairs this season, and honestly, I’m dreading the big one coming up next weekend.
Guess I'm the exception.. 1200% better life now that I earn my living with my hobby. I used to work at the Dutch dog taxes though and that was a terrible job!
You are correct. It was years after I left my job, before I could enjoy doing it for fun again.
Such a great video! I've gone through this cycle myself and reached the same conclusion a while back now. The video might not stop someone from falling into the trap, but might very well allow them to see the negative side sooner! Keep up the great work!
Love your content! I find your voice and perspective refreshing. Just wanted to say that I would totally listen to the audio version of your videos as well.
Don't do what you love. Love what you do. I took a job I knew nothing about. It's 15 years later and it has evolved because my knowledge and experience grew, but I still enjoy it to this day.
I've discovered that I have more hobbies now, and I really enjoy them. If I could monetize one of them, I would be happy, but I wouldn't want to lose the joy they bring. I completely agree with your viewpoint.
I’ve turned things I love into jobs and love the jobs I’ve worked infinitely more than the jobs I didn’t enjoy, even prior to starting them.
I think you’re talking about entrepreneurship more than ‘job you love’ - that’s where the lines really start to blur.
For example, I work in film and media running my own business.
The jobs where we just shoot and hand over an SD card are the greatest!
The jobs where we have to themn handle the edit, production and delivery are a lot more burdensome and can be a heavier load because the entrepreneurial efforts are higher.
This video came at such a good time for me. I spend most weekends feeling guilty that I am doing anything but work when I could check my inbox an get organized for the week ahead. Yet, if I work weekends I start the next week drained and overwhelmed (last Friday I switched off with massive neck and shoulder pain from the stress and the time staring at the screen). The wok environment is getting more and more toxic with expectations on us delivering more tasks that can possibly be done during 9-5, however your video is a good reminder that we need to disconnect and find something to do that is a good balance between what we enjoy doing and something we don't get invested emotionally. Otherwise, the guilt of not working during free time will stop us from doing something we enjoy during the free time.
I recently stumbled upon your channel.. Great Channel 👍🏾 Your information is " straight up" practical and straight forward.. You obviously have a great mind and the ability to clearly effectively share character building information.. Keep up the good work.. I will subscribe..
I love interior decorating and design and I thought I missed my calling not going into that field. But what you say about starting to resent what you do if you turn your love into your work is exactly why I didn’t do it. I was always fearful that I would start to hate interior design if I did it for a living.
This is a great observation that I never really thought about, but you're right. I used to love drawing for fun when I was a kid and into my early 20s. After I got paying jobs to draw/create images in my mid 20s -- I gradually lost my desire to draw for fun on my own time. At 57, I am still this way. Perhaps when I'm retired for a few years, I'll get that spark back to want to draw just for fun?