this is the “nice 😎” drop off box. drop off your “nice 😎”’s here. also if you are wonder why there are comments from yesterday it is because patreon people get early access to all videos (and are not pedophiles) 👉 www.patreon.com/shoe0nhead
I remember South Park made a joke about this when Ike was 'dating' his School Teacher. Ironically, when Kyle, Ike's brother, reported it to the police, they didnt take it seriously and wanted to congratulate Ike for it. That's one of the first times my mind was blown at how real South Park was.
the author deserved to be punched for making the puns in the first place, but the palpable pride he had of making them makes him deserving of insertion into volcano.
My great grandfather was serving in the army in France in 1915 when he was 14 and won the military medal for bravery during the 100 days offensive when he was 17. He was very nearly killed at the battle of Amiens and most of his unit was wiped out. Lord Nelson had already been in the Navy for 2 years when he was 14. If being bedded by a sexy cougar and getting rid of the V-card is the most traumatic thing that happened to you at 14 I'll swap you. Most kids I went to school with were sexually active at that age except for me and a few other nerds. Getting rid of my V-card cost me £150 in the end.
There was a girl in my high school that molested her friend's 12 y/o brother. The kid's sister ended up beating her ass in the lunch room when she found out.
On top of the female double standard , there’s also attractive privilege: if she wasn’t a smoke show and was an overweight lady with an eye patch they would be calling it rape I bet . You’re absolutely correct when you say they’re projecting
was looking for this comment. you could easily reduce the age-gap by ten to twenty years, it doesn't matter - if she didn't look great, they'd immediately call it rape.
Yeah the messages would probably be more along the lines of "dang son you could've picked better oh well maybe they did it in the dark a score is a score" or some such crap.
what's really upsetting is that young male victims often don't get to express how they were indeed traumatised, ive read more than one account where the child mentions how they are mocked when they express how the experience was bad, resulting in recurrent nightmares, loss of friendships, family issues, etc.... Its truly heart-breaking, this double standard should not exist, but it does.
I've seen a youtube video about male abuse victims and how they often don't get help or aren't taken seriously, when they call in to a abuse hotline they are often told they don't help male victims and are redirected to the male abuser hotline where abusers can get help to become better... I know it isn't about child rape/abuse but it also shows the double standard men/boys face in our society.
can someone explain the 'smell toast' thing in this video to me? I'm a gen-xer and therefore hopelessly out of the loop. Help me millennials. like...some sort of weird reference to neurosurgeon Wilder Penfield is all I can think of here or maybe 'bread tube' but that doesn't really make sense.
@@Muonium1 im a fellow zoomer, and i gotchu. So when people have strokes, typically they describe a smell of burnt toast. So, her joke was "am i having a stroke" basically.
Hmm, i am alone. 32. I hate all human beings. I wonder why. No one cares because "i was lucky". The sadest part is this is our peak. This is the peak of humanity. This is the peak of our "intelligence". Do you not feel that is time for something new?
Knew a kid in high school who was being molested by a friend's mom. He was absolutely embarrassed and traumatized as his behavior changed after it started. It only got worse when the molestation was discovered. He killed himself a week later. He was 15. The mom was not prosecuted.
As a victim of rape done on me by women, when I was 12, I want to thank you for making this video. I kept silent for 17 years and I have to say even after I have counseling and therapy, sometime it's hard for me to cope. And what hurts probably the most is how society look at this situation. I want to reward any voice speaking about this, so I sent some coffee money. And besides I watch you for like 10 years or how long you are here, many times with adblock on, so I guess we are even. Thank you and have a nice day.
The sad thing is there's not much in the way of support for male victims of sexual abuse. I also was a victim when I was really young, and it messed me up emotionally to where I've never been able to have a normal relationship. Every relationship I've had has ended badly because I am emotionally damaged and not able to connect properly with the person I'm dating. Feelings of love end up expressed by alternating between apathy and obsession, and it doesn't help that it more-or-less turned me into a sociopath until I finally had an emotional breakdown when I was 18 caused by antidepressants, after which I could finally feel emotions. I'm 28 now and I can't barely hold a stable job, every relationship I've had ended in disaster and broke me back down emotionally back to where I was when I was 18/19, and I'm worse off financially now than when I graduated high school. If I didn't have my family to help support me with certain things I probably would be either homeless or dead (self-inflicted). Therapy and counseling can only go so far, and if the person you are in a relationship with doesn't understand and support you through your emotional issues, your relationship collapses and you end up worse off than before you started dating in the first place. And society tells you to 'man up' like you skinned your knee ignoring the fact that you are either emotionally dead or a completely broken mess that has no choice but to kill the part of yourself that makes you who you are. And if you don't 'man up' you end up collapsing into your own spiral of self-loathing and depression where the only thing that you have to look forward to is a new cheap thing that will allow you to temporarily forget your pain for a few hours or days until the novelty of whatever the new cheap thing is wears off.
@@shred1894 thank you for sharing! I know it's hard, and I don't know you, but I'm glad you are still here and still sharing your experiences! You matter and your voice matters! ♥️ ❤️❤️
I worked at a psychiatric facility for years. The double standard in the psyche field is crazy. If a male staff member was discovered having an inappropriate relationship with a client they were immediately fired, arrested, and imprisoned. If a male staff was even accused of any inappropriate touching or anything sexually inappropriate with a client, they would be immediately suspended until an investigation was complete (female patients weaponized this and would falsely accuse male staff all the time). I personally walked in on a female nurse having "relations" with a male patient multiple times. Not only was she not fired and arrested after myself and another staff reported it, she wasn't even suspended. To my shock she was back at work the next day. My manager told me that the female nurse "had issues right now" and we had to be supporting of her. She was eventually fired after multiple incidents with multiple clients. This was not an isolated incident there. While I worked there, female staff were caught being sexually inappropriate with patients at about three times the rate that male staff were. I will not speculate as to why that was, but female and male staff were treated very, very differently after the fact. Our rule/policies even stated that it was illegal for a male staff to have inappropriate sexual relationships with patients. It actually said, and specifically stated "male" staff. I was told they finally changed the terminology in that policy just recently to just say "staff".
S*xual abuse (especially with minors) is usually a result of power dynamic, not gender. And since nowadays many women are in position of power (especially in medicine and education) its no surprise to see an increase there. Even at "normal" r*pe, its usually the power dynamic of plain physical strength. But its still surprising that many of these (recorded) cases happen in the US. In Europe for example you rarely find these cases. I think the overall toxic dating and hookup culture in the US is also a contributing factor.
Shoe, this kinda crap is why it took me years to tell I was abused. It's like oh yeah a women slept with you? What you hated it? Are you gay? Like people think it's cool if it's a woman but a dude people are ready to burn the world! The psychological effects are devastating.
God, people trying to call sexually abused boys 'gay' is so sexist and homophobic. Its so sad you faced harassment for this shit. These double standards are so fucked.
"Are you gay?" "No I'm attracted to women" "Doesn't mean you aren't gay" That's an actual conversation I had with someone like that. Just another fucking idiot who deserves a bit of a memory jogging via a forced head slam on a sturdy table.
@@briancrosby152 you didn't deserve to. :( the extra piled-on trauma that boys and men have to feel about this stuff is one reason the way things work now cannot be how it works in the future
As a Male SA survivor I will say that shockingly other men have been the most supportive and empathetic. Whereas numerous women have doubted me, mocked me, told me I was lying or hell a few even told me I deserved it. I know I'll never get justice for what was done to me. But I really hope future generations wont have to go through what I have. What Shoe said at 5:06 is so important. The trauma ruins so many avenues of your life from relationships and intimacy to trust to just having the ability to feel safe. To clarify, this isn't a "Men vs. Women" comment and this isnt a "Men vs Women" issue. It's a far more complex and deeply ingrained issue in our society.
Almost all of the commentors saying it was okay what this teacher did were male. So your anecdote doesnt mean a whole lot. I also honestly dont believe you. In my life its always been men who didnt believe my abuse. Or thought I did something to provoke it.
Had a discussion with a friend about the Kylie Strickland incident and he said “so you would be mad at her if she flashed your son?” and I asked him “would you be mad if a man did that same thing to your daughter?” He tried making excuses, then ended the conversation
I was sexually abused as a kid and it took almost like 2 decades to realize it was in fact not poggers and was why I never developed romantic relationships and had intense social anxiety.
5:05 Without going into too much detail I can say from personal experience that this is true. When I was a child I had... an experience with a grown woman and it left me with both an obsession with sex and a deep fear of sex. I will be 32 this year and to this day it is the only sexual experience I've ever had because of the fear it left me.
thats what these people refuse to see, actual consecuence of this behavior, they try to insist that we are different when we are humans like everyone else and can be harmed in a lot of the same ways
“girls and boys are different” is not an argument here. regardless of gender, minor’s brains have not developed yet therefor they cannot consent. why is that hard for these people to understand
in case someone wants to know a person's brain becomes fully developed around 25 with the prefrontal cortex taking from around 16-25 to fully develop now each most countries have it in and around that age bracket as the age of majority so a 14 yr hasn't even reached that stage just adds to how messed up this and of course she is also rich which puts her in a second level of power because of her monetary might.
They think consent is about desire. In reality, that is only really the tip of the iceberg. Without full understanding, control, lack of coercion, comfort, and even just the whims of sometimes not being up for something, there can be no consent. A child cant have full understanding, a child doesn't have that control, a child can easily be coerced by an authoritative figure; so the fact that a child can genuinely experience sexual desire and be comfortable in the moment is not enough. It's also in this situation, the implicit misogyny of not being able to see women as dangerous or predatory.
@Jamal Ramadan i mean it's sexist both ways, it implies also that women are more emotional and therefore more traumatized whereas men are tough and should be able to 'deal with it' which is wrong obviously but it comes from patriarchy and toxic masculinity.
I think it there is an implicit, underlying sentiment within society that is rarely - if ever - spoken. That men enjoy sex, but women endure it. Many people will base opinions and statements on this without even thinking that they hold this sentiment, I believe thay is how implicit this sentiment is. That leads people to assume that, even if both a young boy and a young girl "consent" to sexual actions with an adult, then one of them really wanted it and the other one was simply mislead or groomed. It's a disgusting double-standard that I think also ties into the general infantilisation and wider underestimation of women as people.
Instead they attack people for their thoughts yet there are real predators in the streets they feel stronger attacking the week and are scared of going at actual bad people. Theyre also scared of their own fucking shit in their closet coming to life. Society is a failure as we know it today
We did have a female predetor as a kid. 1998, Our 8th grade science teacher. She would bring boys into the back room for what she called 'extra credit'. We all knew what was going on. Somone called her out and she got fired for it.
@@dodgermaven I was 14 or 15 at the time. I'm not sure I would have known what that word meant at the time... To busy learning Quadratic Equations. 😂 I just know she was fired for it. I honestly don't know what else became of it.
Lots of possible outcomes to the story, and I'd imagine most of them would have been kept away from the students, but just knowing she was exposed and fired is definitely better than nothing.
When I was a teen girl in HS, I had a problem with a male security guard. He'd make me late to class so he could walk me to the principal, touched my hair, demanded my name and even followed me home a few times. They didn't believe me entirely but he was removed from the school. There's a female security guard in the same school. She was a younger security guard, in her mid-late 20s to early 30s and very well endowed in curves so a lot of the boys had a crush on her. I know several of the boys were friends with her son. It got out that she had sex with several of them and the rumors flew around school like wildfire. But was she ever removed? Did she lose her job over this? Nope... I graduated in 2009 and she's STILL THERE. My younger brother graduated in 2021 and he even told me stories about her; not knowing I already knew her and her ways. It is absolutely DISGUSTING, this double standard. I'll make note that the male security guard didn't get in real trouble until the following year when he was caught buying alcohol for minor girls and making them give him a BJ . They really need to care about kids more. I have a friend who's been r***ed as a child who grew up to be schizophrenic from it and has completely lost touch with reality. Pray this world will one day soon heal from the madness ✨ ❤
@@lostconciousness4255 there's a way they could investigate. No offense but this comment is also the double standard. I didn't have pictures of the one who followed me home or any witnesses but they REMOVED him for student safety and put him in a school of elementary kids. I don't want this woman to have her life ruined but if students are speaking up, it should be looked into. What does it say to the students that their voices aren't heard and concerns aren't brought to light? There's a whole lot of steps between the investigation and the loss of her job. I don't suppirt "cancel culture" but the point June made in this video is the double standard. I know you have a good heart by what you say however I'm just looking at the bigger picture. They don't treat cases with women predators as hashly at all.
Sex with someone under the age of consent is a crime. No elaboration needed. I would have happily done it when I was a kid. And I would have been traumatized and filled with regret afterwards. Both can be true.
The problem is that we as a society, has fetishize the horrible act of teachers grooming and raping their underage students. Regardless of attractiveness, these people have a serious mental problem when they are in a position of power when watching over kids.
Nah, it's normalization of sexual assault in general Depending on attractiveness, a woman can get away with things that a man would be arrested for Things like that happen to adult men too, like getting someone so intoxicated they can't do anything about it (which tbf, there's surprisingly huge amount of people who think it's ok, regardless of victims gender )
I don't think it's necessarily the fantasy that's bad. I can fully understand liking a messed up fantasy. The bad part is tying that fantasy to reality and expecting it to work out well because happy brain chemicals. No stop thinking with the head between your legs, and start thinking with your heart! Why can't people just roleplay with consenting adults?
@@darkdaxterversionz Completely agreed. Yes, it's totally okay to have kinky and weird (to others) fantasies. No, it's not okay to force others into those fantasies who can't or won't consent. I'm constantly surprised by how many people seem to oppose the former, and equally surprised by how many people seem to forget the latter. Is it that difficult to distinguish fantasy and reality?
@@tasnica2438 Apparently so. You would think that the studies from Germany supporting Anonymous Therapy initiatives would prove that, but apparently not.
Aught now I gOtta know how many children have libido in this situation and why- I assume it'd be male culture to push sexual expectations onto them but I wanna know the neurology.
"he probably wanted it" yeah sure... in the moment you can feel like what's happening is a good thing, actually the person in the position of power committing the crime or abuse may be what makes the victim think it's okay, "wow my teacher is this into me, she must think I'm really mature for my age" "I must be her favorite student". But after the fact, the horror of what they had actually experienced can settle in. This is why children cannot consent. They lack the power and authority of an adult, they can't govern their own choices the same way. When one party holds an unbalanced amount of power and control over the livelihood, wellbeing, and safety of the other party it's not consensual, its a trap, it's abuse.
Framing it as if sex itself is some horrific regrettable act regardless of circumstance is just doing the same shit from the opposite direction, and sidesteps all the actual reasons behind the concept of consent Focusing on making people feel bad about the act, and not on the actual realistic consequences of sex and relationships which make these values important fucks kids up- the same as those weird religious drives to push celibacy on teens
As a child molestation victim, I can confirm that this take is accurate. You might enjoy it in the moment or think it's cool or not even care at all, but as you mature, things start to click in your head and you realize what actually happened. If you're lucky, you realize this before you grow up and try to be intimate with someone else, and get the opportunity to press charges and see the other person served justice.
I mean, I would snort that in one go but the couldn't shouldn't have it. I should :) Actually 2lbs is WAYYY too much but I would work through it like a champ....
As a guys that got graped by woman when I was 14, I wanted to puke when I saw people say "good for him" in the comments below the article, let me tell you, it's not even slightly pleasurable, it hurts, makes you feel powerless, your whole throat goes sore, and leaves you scarred for the rest of your life, it's disgusting how people can joke about it or even say that it's good that it happened, I loathe this kind of behaviour, and I feel great pity for the boy in question
I haven't gone through this and I hope I won't, but sometimes, even when your pp is erect, if you press it against something it hurts, I can't imagine how it is to be r*ped by a 40 y/o woman, most likely doing so in the way that is pleasant for her and not you (if ykyk). I even heard a pp can shrink from v*ginal pressure, making it smaller and yeah I don't think it feels that good, based on what I heard about how a peach feels like, it doesn't seem to feel that good. Must be traumatic and must've made you scream.
@@ktv9247 imagine saying you "don't believe" someone else's trauma. You could have kept that to yourself instead of causing more to be put on your digital footprint.
I thought I was awesome when I was 14 and had a thing with a woman in her late 30s. After a string of failed relationships in my adult life, I learned a lot about attachment in therapy. Weird to have “mommy issues” when you have a great relationship with your mom 👀 any adult who seeks a relationship with a child is not doing it for any reason other than the P word
People who write these articles need to take this kinda thing way more seriously. The fact that there's crap like this where they just talk about what she does outside of the horrible crime she committed and downplay it like a mf when, if it were a dude, that'd be priority #1 with the same journalist(s)...yuck. Absolutely disgusting.
I'm 99% certain that every single journalist in the UK chose their career purely for the puns. You'd think an article about pedophelia would make them put the breaks on, but apparently not...
@@peaceandloveusa6656 I don't know how you can find humor in something this horrible. The level of normality on issues like this are beyond disturbing.
@@kristiannoetorres Tell me you don't understand dark humor is a coping mechanism without telling me you don't understand dark humor is a coping mechanism.
I was a sophomore in high school and this girl sat next to me in lunch and started rubbing my thigh and I told her to stop which she didn’t, so I walked off, I stay away from her now.
Imagine really liking a teacher, and being excited that they give you special attention. Then imagine them forcing themselves on you where your first sexual experience is completely confusing and lacking of any agency. Then your teacher, whom you adored and respected, tells you you have to live with these incredibly complicated and sick feelings of what just happened in total silence or your favorite teacher will lose their job, you'll never see them again, and it will be all your fault. Then months, even years later, some suburban dad who works at OfficeMax says you're ungrateful for daring to open up about how your childhood was destroyed by someone you trusted. No wonder kids like this end up mentally shattered.
It makes me think of the wrestler Jake Roberts who lived through an incident like this when he was a child, and he was molested several times by his step-mother who was 21 at the time. He's very eloquently spoken when talking about the trauma/mistrust that it brought him, and it's sad that so many people's first question towards him is "was she hot?". It's not about what you're feeling in that moment, it's about how it will effect you in the future, and how it might warp your perception of relationships!
Jake had such a brutal life. His father was an inces*uous molester too, and Jake dint take his daughter on his life for a long time out of fear he might act out like his dad too
The “keep his mouth shut” irritated me for a lot of reasons. But the thing that gets me is that a lot of guys ask the question of “why don’t people care about men when they’re abused?” And that segment was the answer right there.
they only love to bring up the "what about men?" argument when it's a woman speaking out on her abuse and inequalities. and once men speak out on their abuse and inequalities, they're hit with the "man up and shut up" from those same "men's rights activist" crowd.
@@gayfield420 it’s so depressing. They think sjws or feminist or the “woke”crowd are so awful when we’re the reaction to the system. Men, white men specifically just didn’t react with us. They understand somethings wrong but they don’t understand they’re defending the problem
I had a sexual interaction w a 32 year old when I was 15… she was good looking and I always tried to view It as a point of pride but now I’m 23 and I’ve always struggled w relationships… not that I cant talk to other or anything I just find It difficult. Never thought I was cool bc of my interaction but seeing this video… The double standards so beyond gross and I’m realizing I should prolly seek counseling for this issue alone. I got “lucky” like all these sickos claim but I’m struggling to foster new relationships in a situation where I do wish to form new ones. Idk if it’s because of this experience I’ve had but I’m not going to pretend like It isn’t a potential cause. I should prolly seek counseling, and it took me 8 years to realize. Thank you Shoe for enlightening me, you’re doing a truly great job. You should post more often, need voices like yours now more than ever
This is so sick. I have a male cousins who was molested when they were young and I know how much it's messed up his life. Yes, some boys want it. But like all parents should know, just because a kid wants something in no way means it's good for them to get it. Thank you for fighting the good fight Shoe.
Even then, a boy may want it but may not be ready for everything that comes from it. Pretty sure that is exactly how it would play out when I was that age. Something that could become very self destructive
@@gups6662 Absolutely. There is such a rapid change in boy's (and girl's) hormones at that age. Using it to take advantage of them, however they may feel about it, is disgusting. "Doing it" is a very adult action and is more than just the act. It's repercussions effect people for years, if not their entire adult lives. Trying to joke it away because, "boys want it LOL" is repulsive.
@@tigewilson6209 Shoe had it right, the guys joking about are just placing themselves in that position and not considering the aspect of being 14 but view it as themselves now. But we really need to people to use their primary head a bit more. Guys are coming around to this, but you know how dumb we can be when a women were attracted to is involved. Some of us never get out of H.S. lol. That and guys that maybe have had this type thing will joke about it as a defense mechanism
Exactly. If we decided everything a kid wants is ok, legal and acceptable then they would be eating junk food all day, drinking and driving before they turned 14 for starters. But we don't do that. Adults have a responsibility to NOT just have a kid do whatever they want but what's good for them. Let alone be complicit, endorse, enable or take advantage of the things they want to do.
I was really emotionally toxic to girls I dated in high school because I would have flashbacks to being assaulted by a female, teenage neighbor as a kid. People have litterally told me I am like 2 different people. It is not fun and takes a lot of therapy.
similar story for me. I was 9 when a teenage girl of 16 molested and groomed me. never talked about it till I was 20, never formed any relationships with girls growing up because I would duck-out anytime things got even slightly physical. cant stand be touched by girl without feeling uncomfortable. it fucking sucks cause I never developed the necessary relationship skills/wisdom for interpersonal relations with a significant other. 27 now and I'm the most alone ever been. I cant seem to get passed myself in this regard. fucking sucks
@@Ahmonza that's horrifying and i'm so sorry. i reallly hope you are able to find and afford the right therapist and right kind of therapy. being alone is so hard when youre unable to deal with touch or physicality in a relationship, but there are other people out there who have similar experiences or still want relationships but also have an aversion to touch and physicalness themselves. i wouldnt know the first thing about how to find them but they exist, theres someone who understands how you feel because they feel something similar themselves, somewhere. but i'm sure you know you need therapy for this no matter what, if you're not already in it, i really pray (in a nonreligious way) that you can get it. again im so sorry this happened to you
@@Ahmonza don't listen to these people that keep trying to convince you you're broken just because you had some fun when you were a kid. Find a therapist you feel comfortable talking to. There's a million reasons you could be having these issues. And even if that experience is one of those reasons, it's only traumatic if you believe it to be traumatic. Don't underestimate how strong you are. You just need a therapist to show you the way.
@@Ahmonza That's absolutely non-consensual in that case, but what I said still applies. I'm a therapist and I've had many clients go through very traumatic events and come out perfectly fine, until someone years later convinces them that it was traumatic. I really fucking hate TikTok for spreading all this bullshit pop psychology that makes everyone think they're an expert when all they're doing is spreading harm. Mental illness is like something to brag about now, it's ridiculous.
You know what I love about your channel ShoeOnHead ... its where reasonable people, whether they are conservative or liberal, come to point at the crazies at either end of the spectrum and yell "NO! STOP!" It gives me hope, that things might eventually normalize ... Also your reactions are hysterical!
Being a male survivor of child sexual abuse, I am shocked - but yet not surprised - by the number of fellow men coming forth with their own stories of being sexual abused ... Yet, whilst I feel overwhelmed by that, I'm also touched, deeply , by the wellspring of compassion shown ... it reminds me all is far from not lost, yet, and there is loving-kindness towards victims, and survivors ...
I'm here with you brother. Happened to me multiple times growing up by both men and women. It's a hard thing to talk about for us men, but being open about our experiences is a step towards de-normalizing pedophilia. Thanks for being brave enough to share this!
I'm also remembering the fun times (Hermesmann v. Seyer and Olivias v. Arizona) when a female rapist successfully sued her underage victim for child support. Imagine getting betrayed, manipulated, and raped by an adult you thought you could trust, then relentlessly mocked by horny men, and then sternly told by a judge "victims have rights, but in this case victims also have responsibilities" and ordered to hand over a massive portion of your paychecks for the first 20 years of your working life for the person who raped you to use as their personal fun-money fund! 😵
I remember this one reddit post about a guy who got predated as a child. I cant remember the specifics of most of it, but one thing in particular made the story stick in my mind. He described experiencing a lot of shit, including a full fucking panick attack, from just visiting his hometown where it happened. Not even the specific place (if im remembering correctly), but just the town. Now imagine having trauma like that and trying to form a healthy relationship with a woman.
I don't know what post you saw but as a victim myself I can confirm that whatever he was saying is probably valid. A lot of people don't realize that minors are almost always coaxed into the situation that leads to the abuse. Being sexually victimized just changes how you have to go about your life in order to be comfortable.
The horse puns _alone_ should get the writer fired, blacklisted, forbidden from using any form of communication, and the soles of his feet worked over with a meat tenderizer.
The Hulu series Fosse/Verdon is one of the only depictions I’ve seen in modern media about a man who is coping with the trauma of being sexually preyed on by adult women as a boy. Shows how these experiences are abusive and can result in some people coping through substance abuse and leading to difficulty in having healthy romantic relationships. And his own male friends do the whole “lucky kid” thing when they hear the story of what happened to him. Good series overall, and I think they handled this issue responsibly for once.
I've never heard of this show but I will definitely be giving it a watch. Could be useful to use as a tool to help teach others about how difficult it is to be a victim of this type.
Imagine being the kid. Being confused emotionally about the whole situation and everyone online is saying he's lucky but inside he's in pain. Actually terrible
@@owningdishonestshills7435 Yep, same as "predatory", "creepy" etc, these words are used wrongly so often but then when they should be used, they're dismissed. It's like "the boy who cried wolf" but all over the place, wrongful usage of it when it doesn't apply, then when it actually happens nobody believes it. Really is a sick world.
@@pjabber5679 Adult sleep with adult men, they get caught, both get in trouble over it as sleeping with co workers is not allowed in that job, the woman then claims she was groomed. It has happened countless times.
@@600795621 One participant was under the age of consent. The situation defaults to being rape. No, the kid could have literally, publicly begged for it, with thousands of sources for video evidence of it and it still would be. That's how age of consent works.
I was sexually harassed by a 40-50 year old woman once and I was 18 at the time. I still feel uneasy thinking back at it, though luckily nowhere near traumatised. I CANNOT imagine how a 14 year old boy would feel about literal rape. That shit is mentally scarring.
Exactly. They make up these dream fantasies in their minds but don’t think that it won’t be their dream partner, it will be someone they don’t want forcing themselves on them.
@@abcdefghilihgfedcbaYou better watch your tongue before you lose it. Where I'm from saying shit like that will get you're ass beat beyond recognition. (I don't care if you're a man, woman, gay, or straight). It's never okay to diddle or beat a child what plannet do you live on?
@@abcdefghilihgfedcba laws worldwide also disagree on if the right to be legally recognized as a couple should be given to gay people, they also disagree on whether kissing someone of the same sex is grounds for stoning you to death. Your point?
I know several guys that were molested by woemn when they were kids. and all of them are not 'health' sexually. Dudes will put up a front, but it damages them. One guy I know has never had a healthy relationship, and he says point blank cuz of the babysitter that molested him. He was 13, she was in her 30s. That article really does show the double standard. Wanna bet she gets a slap on the wrists?
ya female boy rape is bad because some boys will not take it well. People should wait til they are the age of consent before exposing chilfren to this adult content.
This really affects you in ways that only become apparent over time. And there is no way anyone will see it from the outside. You will try to repress it as much as you can. Even the boy himself will not understand it until later a lot of the time. It hits you like a truck, the fact that you didnt actually like that situation. The person you are at 13 is drastically different from when you are 20 (including sexual maturity, which a lot of men and women seem to not be able to understand). The stats don't lie, the rate of mental issues and suicide skyrocket for victims like these once they grow up.
"Should of kept his mouth shut" Can't imagine why male victims are afraid to speak out. Can't imagine why male suicide rates are on the rise. Can't imagine why the perception of healthy relationships continues to get worse and worse.
Should have. No where in English is it "should of" ... it's should have or maybe should've. Never, at any point is the language "should of" as you quote.
You are amazing and I love your straight to the point attitude. Thank you so much for standing up for the victims who are sexually molested by either a teacher or a parent or someone else they trust
I was xually assaulted by a woman as a child. I was maybe 9 and simply didn't have the toolkit to even understand what had happened. I thought my parents would be mad and didn't tell a soul until I was an adult. (My parents are unbelievably decent people, and absolutely would not have been mad at me)
ya female boy rape is bad because some boys will not take it well. People should wait til they are the age of consent before exposing chilfren to this adult content.
I feel you. I was 6 when a friend of the family decided to introduce x-time and physical abuse. She (21 at the time) was the trusted family friend and one point tried to kidnap me. Being Hispanic was told that what being a man was, also men do not kiss and tell (This was the 1970's). That set how I dealt with relationship in the future. For the longest time with abusive females. This changed when my daughters were x abused (At the same age I was) by their mother's boyfriend, after their mother and I broke up (I was oversea with the military), did I get help. Granted it was during my daughters therapy treatment I broke down. For those closet pedo's supporters. At 14 both boy's and girls are having feels, if girls did not we would not have the underage mother issue we have today, does not mean they are ready. They looking for someone to accept them and show them affection. It is victimizes like you encourage others to bring pain into someone else's life.
@@l01230123 right? It's always hilarious the dudes who think that they got molested as a young boy and somehow didn't have it affect their emotional and sexual development. News flash: it did. They're just too lacking in self-awareness to be fully cognizant of how it affected them. That might sound condescending, and I honestly don't care. It's basic psychology.
See, it's stuff like "I didn't have the toolkit" that makes me so angry when people oppose sex-ed being taught in schools. If you're a kid and someone rapes you but you don't even know what sex is, let alone that an adult doing it to you is taking advantage of you, how do you even express that? It's why so much of the child testimony around this is told in euphamisms and in ways adults have to interpret. Not to mention that it's again worse for men in this respect because most sex-ed still defines rape as penerative.
I was 13 when my dad got a prostitute for me, I was in a foreign country with him on a business trip. Him and a business partner of his pressured me into going through with it doing the whole "Oh you're so lucky! I would have loved if my dad did this for me when I was your age" thing. I wanted to "be a man" and was attracted to her (very beautiful Chinese lady of the night) so I went through with it, afterwards I did the whole scrubbing myself in the shower "oh God I'm so unclean, what did I do!?" cliché. It still affects me to this day 22 years later and has contributed a lot to my feelings of hypervigilance/trust issues and self loathing.
Sorry to hear this. May I ask; how is the relationship towards your dad now? And did your mom know about it? For me it would be a reason to ditch such family members.
Oh dude, nice. Big trouble in little china. Awesome. I didn’t get a prostitute, I was just molested 🤷🏼♂️ Anyways yeah all that stuff you mentioned sucks.
Sorry that you went through it, but I'm glad you're able to speak about it cuz people need to hear it. People literally gaslight teenage boys into liking sexual activities they were forced into. Of course that's gonna leave a serious mark, and people need to know.
@@steffimaier7297 I'm an open book so it's no problem. My relationship with my father is the best it ever has been, oddly enough, though I still feel a deep dread and unease around him. My mother was no Saint either, my parents were way overdue for a divorce and it was better for the both of them. My mother did find out, she could tell that I was very quiet and distant after we got home. I ended up telling her which was hard since I was threatened about not to say anything. They hated each other before that but that moment is when it went septic.
@@BlitzkriegBryce " I ended up telling her which was hard since I was threatened about not to say anything" So basically, your dad knew what he did was fucked up so he threatened you? Sorry, but what type of threat? if you don't mind my asking-- just super messed up i couldn't imagine my relationship recovering after all that.
I've been s3xually assaulted several times by women. When I plucked up the courage to tell people in positions of responsibility (university staff/work manager) I was either laughed at or got eye rolls and told to "get a life". With the job incident, when the woman found out (gold knows how) I complained about her, she made false allegations about me, which were ofc taken seriously right away and I was put through hell for months till I just quit. Most of my male friends have also been assaulted by women. But men are the ones constantly told how awful they are and how all women are victims of us terrible men . The hypocrisy regarding this issue is infuriating. Thank you Shoe for highlighting this.
Well, at least now you know how it works. There's a lot of victim blaming so you're actually better off just getting therapy and avoid putting yourself in the same situation again. :(
It's just crazy how widespread and normalized sexual assault done by women is. I have so many stories I can tell about it. Similarly to violence (hitting etc) we don't seem to teach girls about boundaries like how we do with boys. It's quite unfortunate. And there is nothing we can do about it if it does happen, in fact we can easily be lied about and have it be turned around despite us being the victims. I know that most women are good people, but I have noticed some behavior that even the good ones partake in simply because they are just unaware that it isn't OK. Really don't know how this will be solved.
I know more guys who were sexually assaulted in college than weren't, and not one of us has reported anything to anyone. Just last week one of my friends brought up how he got too drunk and woke up to his ex going down on him. I had experienced almost exactly the same thing, so I wanted to support him, but the other guys just made the typical jokes about how there are worse ways to wake up and how he had to have liked it. I've avoided/lost many relationships due to sexual trauma, and seeing the cycle perpetuated like this is heartbreaking. Guys, we have to support each other and abolish these notions that girls can do what they want and that we should be grateful for whatever we get. This machismo horndog bullshit has got to go.
I've been in a similar position. And I believe guys act like that because that's how society tells them too and they know they won't be taken seriously, so they deal with it by making a joke if it. You're right, It does have to stop
Sorry you and your friends etc went through all that, that's fucked up. I hope dudes everywhere can start taking the shit seriously, and also that women can recognize and support the dudes, too. @__@!
Underaged girls can "enjoy it" or "be willing" too, and it's clear to see why that doesn't matter. It's not okay to r*** underaged boys or girls, end of story.
First of all, I'm sorry for your experience and huge respect for being a survivor. Secondly, I've never even had any significant experience with sexual assault, and the comments disgust me too. I find it hard to key into that level of un-empathy, even if they're just being "edgy"
Just had basically this argument today. Always amazes me how many people a) will perform acrobatics to justify a double standard when it favors them and b) suddenly have problems with double standards when it doesn't favor them. Really gross. Just don't be attracted to minors. It's easy.
Spot on! I see this kinda thing all the time in political discussions, and whenever you point it out, there’s always an excuse. “No, it’s different because x, what they did was truly bad.”
Except for the last sentence I completely agree. Curing the attraction to minors if you have it doesnt Sound terribly easy. I feel compation to anyone that doesnt act on it but seeks help.
@@spirit959ful Totally agree. I can't conceive of the idea of changing the things I'm attracted to. Luckily not minors, but I've got some weird kinks I'd rather not have. If someone finds some magic "no more pedos" pill/therapy/camp, I've got a few annoying kinks that would be easier not to have. Let me know, i'll test if it works on other annoying attractions!
As a man, I was disgusted by that article. I can't imagine the years of awkwardness that are gonna haunt that kid. She looks fucking crazy on top of that are you kidding me!? Also anyone who said "where was she when I was blablabla years old" should be checked up on honestly, like dude get a hold of yourself
All the people supporting such a thing, haven't had it happen to them, and they are literally living in a Manga/anime fantasy. Because they can only view it in the form of fantasy/fetish at this point, they can't understand the real world ramifications. It's really disturbing that people think that way.
@@kennylaysh2776 As much as I despise the people trying to excuse the events, I'd like to play devil's advocate here. The people trying to make excuses could have been victims themselves, and by downplaying the events as a "lucky break" for the child, they are trying to convince themselves of the validity of the claims. That being the mindset that the kid wasn't abused, but fortunate, because if they admitted that the kid was abused, they would have to face the reality that they were abused, weak, vulnerable and most importantly betrayed by someone they trusted too much. And that is my devil's advocate case; Do I buy it? Obviously not. But it's a distinct possibility that popped into my head here.
Man reading comments I almost end up crying , hope the ones who were victim , get better soon .. I never was SA but kind of ...touched and bullied.. so i don't know if it counts but just don't devalue these things and take it seriously and vent/get help with people who actually care .
I always find it weird when people pretend that they understand the experience of someone who's gone through something they haven't. It's like assuming a woman should be okay with rape because you fantasize about rough sex. There's an astronomically huge gap between your personal fantasy and someone's lived hellish experience. Even if the boy *did* enjoy it, there's a non-zero chance that it's going to completely skew his views on relationships, dating, and sex, particularly if she was his first. There's a chance he's going to assume that all women want is to have sex four times a day and have no commitment or relationship beyond that. That's going to really mess him up if he ever dates a girl his own age, or any woman who isn't simply just a sexual predator. He's going to wonder why she's withholding sex, and why she wants to go on dates and get to know him and spend time together and develop a relationship.
or it might not? Since you said in the beginning pretending to experience someone else's experience? No teacher should be having sex with students, but the worst possible outcome doesn't always happen. males are less emotionally attach to sex than women so maybe he be fine. Im sorry I just don't like one sided absolute thinking.
Agreed. Also, there's an astronomically huge gap between having a fantasy and actually realizing a similar situation because, lets be honest, real life rarely lives up to fantasy. When I was a kid, I used to fantasize about being alone in a survival situation. I'm pretty sure it wouldn't have been the greatest thing ever to have happened to me if I really was, say, in a plane crash and had to survive completely alone. The fantasy was just that. Escapism in my room while I waited for my mom to tell me dinner was ready...
It's also an authority figure. You CAN walk away from a sexual assault, or an imbalanced relationship without baggage if you did enjoy it. It's just not typical, and there's always residue from anything you experience. It will change the way you interact with authority figures, workplace relationships, and pleasure. It can skew the way you feel about pleasure. "It was pleasurable, that means I can't complain. I don't have any scars, so let's just stay in this bad situation."
@@ladyville3 child molestation victim here, bad take. You're gonna have to just trust me when I tell you that there is a 100% chance he will experience negative consequences for this his entire life. It really doesn't matter what gender you are or what gender you like, being raped or molested at any age will fuck with you for life. The only things that differ between individuals is how exactly it fucks with you and the frequency at which it does.
@@kailgale part of that is that people have a weird tendency to fantasy they're more capable or more in control than they really are, while everything is an idealized version of people and/or events. that's assuming they even actually understand what they think they want, which is a whole other mess to deal with
This is more of a second hand story, but I remember this instance where a substitute at my high school noncon-ed one of the students over the weekend and a bunch of guys went up to him and did the whole "nice bro" and "you're so lucky" shtick. It was so disgusting seeing that shit, especially when he didn't even look like he enjoyed it, yet they kept going. She was immediately fired and no one remembered her outside of the coomer dude bros who were cheering him on.
They probably wouldn't. It's crazy some people still have some shame and a sliver of sense to not think toddlers are sex-oriented but admitting to their faults and depraved behaviour is way too difficult. Not like living with "being lucky". The better thing you can do is live well bro, wishing you the best
This is disgusting. My friend was one of those boys who was targeted by his teacher. He still at 50 is still screwed up. So no these women should be in prison.
Most predators will not search for you by the Creek or in the trees. Most predators are totally socially integrated and are people near to their victims with their parents trust. Stranger danger should be the least of parents worries. It is good to warn children against unwanted behaviour instead. Teach them to say no, teach them to get help. Show them that you take them serious without drama.
"where was she when i was 14.." Well.. I met mine when I was 8.. Yes I "Wanted", and it's easier to think that it was partly my choice, but it fucked me up a lot, not just for the act itself being too early .But for the inevitable breakup that needed to occur. My mind was not fully developed to deal with that amount of feelings. Being so close with someone, feeling like that person cared about you and then one day it's gone, because she got bored, to this day I have a hard time with my personal relationships... always afraid of beeing abandoned.
Stop blaming all your problems on something that happened years ago and seek professional help. Nothing is ever traumatizing unless you believe it to be traumatizing.
If you're too young to REFUSE, you're too young to consent. Maybe if it was called the "age of refusal", people would start taking it a little more seriously... ...probably not, but maybe.
The fact that they’re making puns in the damn article shows a blatant disregard for just how serious this is. It’s just funny to them, haha, something to laugh at, hilarious! God I hate humanity.
There is a strong double standard regarding rape. I was molested at 14 and when I spoke up and they asked me if I was gay because I didn't enjoy it. It was an awful experience.
I am male and have a twin sister. I asked my abuser one time why he chose to do this with me and not with my twin sister. He answered that he obviously couldn’t, because she was a little girl and that would be wrong. Then I asked him why it would be any different with me because technically I am the younger one. He never seemed to have realised that before.
This is the same thing men hear as an adult if they are raped. I was left with serious psychological damage. I was 21, and in the 17 years since only one person has empathized, the rest of the reactions and comments comments are the same, "but was she hot?" "You probably liked it" etc... say those things to a woman after that experience.
@@flyoverkid55 i was young and dumb, drinking at a party. A girl approached me repeatedly trying to pick up on me, I constantly declined her actions and verbal requests, telling her I had a girlfriend. She didn't drink at all, she had a sober lifestyle. I ended up going to bed drunk alone and woke up with her in my bed. I was told by others in the house that she was quite loud... she had either woke me up or just used me while i was sleeping, I was blacked out at this point and dont remember any of it.
@@flyoverkid55the woman can manipulate, use weapons or get the man drunk. She could be super obese and on top of him. Or she's really muscular. It's really not hard to imagine many many ways.
It amazes that these males who are conservatives, who constantly rail against pedophilia and grooming, are fine with a 14 year old boy being raped by an adult woman. If an adult woman is sexually attracted to a 14 year old, there is something extremely wrong with her. This is probably one the best videos I've ever seen from you, Shoe...
İt's because they don't care about Pedophilia. The reason they pretend they are against grooming is because they can pretend that Drag shows and trans people are grooming kids. İt was never about the kids.
It's not that boys and girls are traumatized by different things... It's that they are traumatized in different ways by the SAME things. There was an interview with a boy who had been abused by a female teacher. He said every thought revolved around "when will I get time with her? Will I get to see her today? Does she want to have sex again?" He said all he could think about was the next time it was going to happen. He was devastated when she didn't speak to him, or paid attention to other students. But she kept stringing him along. He said it ruined him mentally. He doesn't think about things like normal people do anymore. It's a fascinating interview.
if he was raped, he wouldn't be "so happy to see her again." a lot of men spoke about their traumatizing experience that destroyed them, afraid, feeling shame, they did feel this too
When I was 7 my first baby sitter tought me "how to please a woman" multiple times, even to the point of forcefully making out with me, at the time I thought nothing of it. I'm in my late 30s and still have issues because of it.
Oh my god... I am so so sorry that happened to you. All I want to say is that I wish it were possible to hug your inner child. I can't imagine how confusing and scary that must have been. Anything about harming children just tears my heart apart and...you were so young 💔 I hope you're doing alright and that you're taking care of yourself. Best regards.
I am a male that was routinely sexually molested by women in their 30s & 40s. It started when I was 13. You might say, I was an "apt pupil". Friends told friends and I reaped the rewards. If an exceptionally good-looking woman came to get me to "help" with something, my father would even pull me off the tractor. Chest all puffed out, "that's MY boy".
THANK YOU!! There are survivors and male victims who don't get to express themselves about their experiences. I hate how our society has such a gross double standard. Thank you so much for addressing this! ❤️🙌
@@pinkkfloydd No, its actually not. It's a double standard enforced by women as well, but its really primarily enforced by feminists. Hate to break it to you, but feminist have created rape laws where "forced to penetrate" doesn't count as rape. Feminists have done this and other things to destroy the idea that men don't get raped. In ancient times there were actually stories of men getting raped, like lot and his daughters. So no, its not men who enforce this, although on internet comments sections ut might seem that way.
@@pjabber5679 time and a place dude. time and a place. If you feel that way then make groups and lobby the government for equal custody laws and equal money for prostate cancer.homeless shelters etc etc , I would support it but you need to create the infrastructure first
When I was a boy I was blown by one of my mothers friends. I had no idea what was going on. It fucked me and my life up until I was in my 40s and finally got through it. This stuff sounds like a fantasy to some people, but it is likely to lead to psychological issues. Took me until 44 to be able to have a stable relationship.
As someone who was SA’d but definitely manipulated months before the official act I hate this trend. I did keep my mouth shut for years and am still recovering from the scars.
This is the mindset I used to have as a kid, when you grow up in as society that tells you men are the superior sex, than a women can never have power over male and thus never rape him, it's a fundemental misunderstanding of power dynamics. Same logic is applied to male domestic abuse victims, they're told to man up because they're the stronger sex.
Same shit happens with white people and the term white privilege being thrown at them constantly. As if white working class people (who are the majority of white people) are privileged. Just because they're less disadvantaged than a black working class woman doesn't mean they're privileged at all. They're both just different types of disadvantaged. But now people have it in their head that any and all white men have privileges and no 'real problems'. A rich women will ALWAYS have the power dynamic over any working class man. A rich white women actually has access to white privilege, and can use and abuse that. Power dynamics are not like the stone ages...
@@mousysaint9143 As a socialist I agree, race comes with its own disadvantages but the biggest divider is class, concepts like race based discrimination were specifically built to have the working class fight amongst thenselves, worker soldarity should come before anything else.
Domestic abuse is slowly going in the right direction. Johnny Depp won the trial over Amber Heard. But we've still got a very long way to go to treat women the same way as men and not go easy on them for extremely awful things, as evident with how this woman is being treated for r@ping a child.
I was one of these people who were saying “lucky kid.” Not proud of it, I didn’t realize how much it fucked them up later in life. The kid is 14, he doesn’t know wtf he wants and that older teacher was taking advantage of that. It’s fucked
ya female boy rape is bad because some boys will not take it well. People should wait til they are the age of consent before exposing chilfren to this adult content.
Glad you've learned about the damage it causes. Hopefully, we can help spread it to the rest of society and accurately call out how horrifying the actions of these p3d0s truly are. There should be no double standard when it comes to this shit.
as a kid, I used to wish so badly that something like that would happen to me.. as an adult I now see the issue entirely as I was assaulted, can’t imagine how traumatizing it is for a growing child
When I was 15 I got used up by a 24 year old college student. She would come to my high school with no identification etc. walk right in and pick me up. My friends were giving me high fives and the staff at the high school 100% knew what was going on but did nothing but smile at us. It took awhile for me to understand what actually happened. Once I learned the hard way it is not cool at all.
If you're told enough times that you're a victim, eventually you start to believe it. That's the true sad moral of your story. And as a therapist I can confirm this. You CAN be traumatized not by an event but by people convincing you that you should be traumatized by it. Same reason you don't get sad and worried when kids fall.
@@Ace-pc2cm whether you do or don't believe or feel that you are a victim has no effect on if you actually are or not. If I start trying to beat someone up, it doesn't matter if it hurts them or not, they are still a victim of assault.
@@dimwitgang5544 It absolutely fucking does. I'm a therapist. I've had so many clients that were perfectly fine after a "traumatic event" and only got affected by it years later once someone convinced them they were a victim.
this is the “nice 😎” drop off box. drop off your “nice 😎”’s here.
also if you are wonder why there are comments from yesterday it is because patreon people get early access to all videos (and are not pedophiles)
👉 www.patreon.com/shoe0nhead
Nice
Nice
Nice 😎
Nice.
nice 😎
I remember South Park made a joke about this when Ike was 'dating' his School Teacher.
Ironically, when Kyle, Ike's brother, reported it to the police, they didnt take it seriously and wanted to congratulate Ike for it.
That's one of the first times my mind was blown at how real South Park was.
Kyle and his mom were the only ones who cared
"Did she perform oral sex on him?" "Yeah I think so." "Nice... nice."
….nice.
...nice
Didn't Cartman spray that teacher for that?
You can FEEL how proud that author was of those puns
I could feel their UNBRIDLED joy from here.
The fact that he was making puns in an article about this seems like a bad joke in itself.
the author deserved to be punched for making the puns in the first place, but the palpable pride he had of making them makes him deserving of insertion into volcano.
@@korganrocks3995
... or that his editor didn't keep a tight enough reigns on their reporters ...
@@DevineInnovations
Quite ...
One could say that humour wasn't very pun-ney at all ... and the reporter had a bad case of hoof in mouth ...
The absolute psychopathy of "hah, boy, I wish I was raped when I was a kid"
And the "it wasn't r*pe if he enjoyed it", like wtf that's like saying "it's not a war crime if they didn't feel pain"
What 30+ years no sex does to an mfer
My great grandfather was serving in the army in France in 1915 when he was 14 and won the military medal for bravery during the 100 days offensive when he was 17. He was very nearly killed at the battle of Amiens and most of his unit was wiped out. Lord Nelson had already been in the Navy for 2 years when he was 14. If being bedded by a sexy cougar and getting rid of the V-card is the most traumatic thing that happened to you at 14 I'll swap you. Most kids I went to school with were sexually active at that age except for me and a few other nerds. Getting rid of my V-card cost me £150 in the end.
@@zoidberg444 I can see why it cost you.
@@theopdiamond8349 Does anyone have a phone? We need to report a murder.
There was a girl in my high school that molested her friend's 12 y/o brother. The kid's sister ended up beating her ass in the lunch room when she found out.
Good
@@doctorheck2186 Based
We need more people like her in this world
Good
200 IQ move.
On top of the female double standard , there’s also attractive privilege: if she wasn’t a smoke show and was an overweight lady with an eye patch they would be calling it rape I bet . You’re absolutely correct when you say they’re projecting
Hmmm I think comedian amy schumer, who is very overweight, admitted to SA'ing a man and it was laughed off? Idk anymore correct me if i am wrong
was looking for this comment. you could easily reduce the age-gap by ten to twenty years, it doesn't matter - if she didn't look great, they'd immediately call it rape.
If it's a woman it still wouldn't be called rape, as the other case mentioned proves. But there would be much less supportive messages for sure.
She not even that attractive her upper body is like skin and bones
Yeah the messages would probably be more along the lines of "dang son you could've picked better oh well maybe they did it in the dark a score is a score" or some such crap.
what's really upsetting is that young male victims often don't get to express how they were indeed traumatised, ive read more than one account where the child mentions how they are mocked when they express how the experience was bad, resulting in recurrent nightmares, loss of friendships, family issues, etc.... Its truly heart-breaking, this double standard should not exist, but it does.
I've seen a youtube video about male abuse victims and how they often don't get help or aren't taken seriously, when they call in to a abuse hotline they are often told they don't help male victims and are redirected to the male abuser hotline where abusers can get help to become better... I know it isn't about child rape/abuse but it also shows the double standard men/boys face in our society.
can someone explain the 'smell toast' thing in this video to me? I'm a gen-xer and therefore hopelessly out of the loop. Help me millennials.
like...some sort of weird reference to neurosurgeon Wilder Penfield is all I can think of here or maybe 'bread tube' but that doesn't really make sense.
@@Muonium1 im a fellow zoomer, and i gotchu. So when people have strokes, typically they describe a smell of burnt toast. So, her joke was "am i having a stroke" basically.
Hmm, i am alone. 32. I hate all human beings. I wonder why. No one cares because "i was lucky". The sadest part is this is our peak.
This is the peak of humanity. This is the peak of our "intelligence". Do you not feel that is time for something new?
Knew a kid in high school who was being molested by a friend's mom. He was absolutely embarrassed and traumatized as his behavior changed after it started. It only got worse when the molestation was discovered. He killed himself a week later. He was 15. The mom was not prosecuted.
As a victim of rape done on me by women, when I was 12, I want to thank you for making this video. I kept silent for 17 years and I have to say even after I have counseling and therapy, sometime it's hard for me to cope. And what hurts probably the most is how society look at this situation. I want to reward any voice speaking about this, so I sent some coffee money. And besides I watch you for like 10 years or how long you are here, many times with adblock on, so I guess we are even. Thank you and have a nice day.
The sad thing is there's not much in the way of support for male victims of sexual abuse. I also was a victim when I was really young, and it messed me up emotionally to where I've never been able to have a normal relationship. Every relationship I've had has ended badly because I am emotionally damaged and not able to connect properly with the person I'm dating. Feelings of love end up expressed by alternating between apathy and obsession, and it doesn't help that it more-or-less turned me into a sociopath until I finally had an emotional breakdown when I was 18 caused by antidepressants, after which I could finally feel emotions. I'm 28 now and I can't barely hold a stable job, every relationship I've had ended in disaster and broke me back down emotionally back to where I was when I was 18/19, and I'm worse off financially now than when I graduated high school. If I didn't have my family to help support me with certain things I probably would be either homeless or dead (self-inflicted).
Therapy and counseling can only go so far, and if the person you are in a relationship with doesn't understand and support you through your emotional issues, your relationship collapses and you end up worse off than before you started dating in the first place. And society tells you to 'man up' like you skinned your knee ignoring the fact that you are either emotionally dead or a completely broken mess that has no choice but to kill the part of yourself that makes you who you are. And if you don't 'man up' you end up collapsing into your own spiral of self-loathing and depression where the only thing that you have to look forward to is a new cheap thing that will allow you to temporarily forget your pain for a few hours or days until the novelty of whatever the new cheap thing is wears off.
thank you for having the courage to stand and share our story with you, thank you for that
@@shred1894 thank you for sharing! I know it's hard, and I don't know you, but I'm glad you are still here and still sharing your experiences! You matter and your voice matters! ♥️ ❤️❤️
Michal, I'm so sad that you had that experience and haven't gotten the support you've needed. Thank you for speaking up. Please don't ever stop.
You´re from Czechia?
I worked at a psychiatric facility for years. The double standard in the psyche field is crazy. If a male staff member was discovered having an inappropriate relationship with a client they were immediately fired, arrested, and imprisoned. If a male staff was even accused of any inappropriate touching or anything sexually inappropriate with a client, they would be immediately suspended until an investigation was complete (female patients weaponized this and would falsely accuse male staff all the time). I personally walked in on a female nurse having "relations" with a male patient multiple times. Not only was she not fired and arrested after myself and another staff reported it, she wasn't even suspended. To my shock she was back at work the next day. My manager told me that the female nurse "had issues right now" and we had to be supporting of her. She was eventually fired after multiple incidents with multiple clients. This was not an isolated incident there. While I worked there, female staff were caught being sexually inappropriate with patients at about three times the rate that male staff were. I will not speculate as to why that was, but female and male staff were treated very, very differently after the fact. Our rule/policies even stated that it was illegal for a male staff to have inappropriate sexual relationships with patients. It actually said, and specifically stated "male" staff. I was told they finally changed the terminology in that policy just recently to just say "staff".
And people try and say men enforce these double standards and not women, who dominate the medical field.
Wow your job was just hanging by a thread
@@geraldyeager7652Oh brother this guy stinks.
I had a 17 yo female coworker touch my butt. When I said something to my managers they laughed...
S*xual abuse (especially with minors) is usually a result of power dynamic, not gender. And since nowadays many women are in position of power (especially in medicine and education) its no surprise to see an increase there. Even at "normal" r*pe, its usually the power dynamic of plain physical strength.
But its still surprising that many of these (recorded) cases happen in the US. In Europe for example you rarely find these cases. I think the overall toxic dating and hookup culture in the US is also a contributing factor.
Shoe, this kinda crap is why it took me years to tell I was abused. It's like oh yeah a women slept with you? What you hated it? Are you gay? Like people think it's cool if it's a woman but a dude people are ready to burn the world! The psychological effects are devastating.
God, people trying to call sexually abused boys 'gay' is so sexist and homophobic.
Its so sad you faced harassment for this shit. These double standards are so fucked.
@@mousysaint9143 oh pretty much, it's made it hard for myself to feel "Okay" & having to hear all that 💩. Nobody should endure this !
"Are you gay?"
"No I'm attracted to women"
"Doesn't mean you aren't gay"
That's an actual conversation I had with someone like that. Just another fucking idiot who deserves a bit of a memory jogging via a forced head slam on a sturdy table.
@@briancrosby152 you didn't deserve to. :( the extra piled-on trauma that boys and men have to feel about this stuff is one reason the way things work now cannot be how it works in the future
Man that's so fucked. Sorry you have to deal with that! I hope you are seeking treatment for it, if possible! :C
As a Male SA survivor I will say that shockingly other men have been the most supportive and empathetic. Whereas numerous women have doubted me, mocked me, told me I was lying or hell a few even told me I deserved it.
I know I'll never get justice for what was done to me. But I really hope future generations wont have to go through what I have.
What Shoe said at 5:06 is so important. The trauma ruins so many avenues of your life from relationships and intimacy to trust to just having the ability to feel safe.
To clarify, this isn't a "Men vs. Women" comment and this isnt a "Men vs Women" issue. It's a far more complex and deeply ingrained issue in our society.
A few told you that you DESERVED IT?! That is beyond fucked up, I'm sorry that you had to go through that shit, those women are completely heartless.
As a woman, I hope those women get the worst
I'm really sorry that other women have said these horrendous stuff to you. You deserve much better then the treatment you've received.
Almost all of the commentors saying it was okay what this teacher did were male. So your anecdote doesnt mean a whole lot. I also honestly dont believe you. In my life its always been men who didnt believe my abuse. Or thought I did something to provoke it.
@@stephaniemoore8013 You just proved their point.
Had a discussion with a friend about the Kylie Strickland incident and he said “so you would be mad at her if she flashed your son?” and I asked him “would you be mad if a man did that same thing to your daughter?”
He tried making excuses, then ended the conversation
And that conversations name? Albert Einstein.
@@CharlieSmurffy wait what
@@miscl_anon think they're trying to imply it didn't happen, maybe? otherwise I got nothing
"So you would be mad if she flashed your son?"
YES
@@CharlieSmurffy 2070
“You can’t rape the willing” is so sinister
they say gays will bring ruin NO THESE MOFUS WILL
It’s not sinister, it’s demonic!
@@seraphim9429 worse, it’s downright ominous
@@pandoratheclay i'd even argue it's despicable
@@Hat-Kid despicable me👽
I was sexually abused as a kid and it took almost like 2 decades to realize it was in fact not poggers and was why I never developed romantic relationships and had intense social anxiety.
Bruh, that sucks, I'm sorry you went through that. :C Hope you're seeing help
Because you're pussy and you just made up this as trauma now in your head.
5:05 Without going into too much detail I can say from personal experience that this is true. When I was a child I had... an experience with a grown woman and it left me with both an obsession with sex and a deep fear of sex. I will be 32 this year and to this day it is the only sexual experience I've ever had because of the fear it left me.
Interesting way to reveal you got no bitches
Feel for you brother.
I know how you feel..
@@cyrusthegreat7030 That's kind of you to say.
thats what these people refuse to see, actual consecuence of this behavior, they try to insist that we are different when we are humans like everyone else and can be harmed in a lot of the same ways
“girls and boys are different” is not an argument here. regardless of gender, minor’s brains have not developed yet therefor they cannot consent. why is that hard for these people to understand
in case someone wants to know a person's brain becomes fully developed around 25 with the prefrontal cortex taking from around 16-25 to fully develop now each most countries have it in and around that age bracket as the age of majority so a 14 yr hasn't even reached that stage just adds to how messed up this and of course she is also rich which puts her in a second level of power because of her monetary might.
They think consent is about desire. In reality, that is only really the tip of the iceberg. Without full understanding, control, lack of coercion, comfort, and even just the whims of sometimes not being up for something, there can be no consent. A child cant have full understanding, a child doesn't have that control, a child can easily be coerced by an authoritative figure; so the fact that a child can genuinely experience sexual desire and be comfortable in the moment is not enough. It's also in this situation, the implicit misogyny of not being able to see women as dangerous or predatory.
@@BakaGaijinSama 💯!!!
@Jamal Ramadan i mean it's sexist both ways, it implies also that women are more emotional and therefore more traumatized whereas men are tough and should be able to 'deal with it' which is wrong obviously but it comes from patriarchy and toxic masculinity.
@@BakaGaijinSama not misogeny, its misandry. But, i agree.
I love how they just absolutely forget that there are little girls that desperately want attention from male and female teachers too
I think it there is an implicit, underlying sentiment within society that is rarely - if ever - spoken. That men enjoy sex, but women endure it.
Many people will base opinions and statements on this without even thinking that they hold this sentiment, I believe thay is how implicit this sentiment is.
That leads people to assume that, even if both a young boy and a young girl "consent" to sexual actions with an adult, then one of them really wanted it and the other one was simply mislead or groomed.
It's a disgusting double-standard that I think also ties into the general infantilisation and wider underestimation of women as people.
@@belypeprime3838and yet, I'm expected to treat them as equals.
A society that cannot agree to protecting children is worthless.
Instead they attack people for their thoughts yet there are real predators in the streets they feel stronger attacking the week and are scared of going at actual bad people. Theyre also scared of their own fucking shit in their closet coming to life. Society is a failure as we know it today
F*CKING RIGHT
Or hate a whole gender
Feminist call boys "future oppressors" & punish boys for no reason. Deny them benefits, then wonder why they are messed up.
You said it!
We did have a female predetor as a kid. 1998, Our 8th grade science teacher. She would bring boys into the back room for what she called 'extra credit'. We all knew what was going on. Somone called her out and she got fired for it.
But not prosecuted?
@@dodgermaven I was 14 or 15 at the time. I'm not sure I would have known what that word meant at the time... To busy learning Quadratic Equations. 😂 I just know she was fired for it. I honestly don't know what else became of it.
Lots of possible outcomes to the story, and I'd imagine most of them would have been kept away from the students, but just knowing she was exposed and fired is definitely better than nothing.
I love that she got actually fired. Usually they don't. That's how low the bar is.
When I was a teen girl in HS, I had a problem with a male security guard. He'd make me late to class so he could walk me to the principal, touched my hair, demanded my name and even followed me home a few times. They didn't believe me entirely but he was removed from the school.
There's a female security guard in the same school. She was a younger security guard, in her mid-late 20s to early 30s and very well endowed in curves so a lot of the boys had a crush on her. I know several of the boys were friends with her son. It got out that she had sex with several of them and the rumors flew around school like wildfire. But was she ever removed? Did she lose her job over this? Nope... I graduated in 2009 and she's STILL THERE. My younger brother graduated in 2021 and he even told me stories about her; not knowing I already knew her and her ways.
It is absolutely DISGUSTING, this double standard.
I'll make note that the male security guard didn't get in real trouble until the following year when he was caught buying alcohol for minor girls and making them give him a BJ .
They really need to care about kids more. I have a friend who's been r***ed as a child who grew up to be schizophrenic from it and has completely lost touch with reality. Pray this world will one day soon heal from the madness ✨ ❤
rumors are not proof unfortunately. Lots of peoples reputations get ruined because of these. If she really did, shame on her but rumors aren't proof.
@@lostconciousness4255 there's a way they could investigate. No offense but this comment is also the double standard. I didn't have pictures of the one who followed me home or any witnesses but they REMOVED him for student safety and put him in a school of elementary kids. I don't want this woman to have her life ruined but if students are speaking up, it should be looked into. What does it say to the students that their voices aren't heard and concerns aren't brought to light? There's a whole lot of steps between the investigation and the loss of her job. I don't suppirt "cancel culture" but the point June made in this video is the double standard. I know you have a good heart by what you say however I'm just looking at the bigger picture. They don't treat cases with women predators as hashly at all.
@@logicdiary3179 " if students are speaking up, it should be looked into." Are the students complaining about her?
@@kishagiazuka3447 If any of them talk, the rest will bulling him so hard fr xddd.
Oh COME ON!!!
Sex with someone under the age of consent is a crime. No elaboration needed. I would have happily done it when I was a kid. And I would have been traumatized and filled with regret afterwards. Both can be true.
This. Kids in that age think sex is something godly. The shame of being "used" they will feel afterwards is so ignored on that tweet.
i cant agree more
It is simply super duper criminal.
there are literally incels that exist
The problem is that we as a society, has fetishize the horrible act of teachers grooming and raping their underage students. Regardless of attractiveness, these people have a serious mental problem when they are in a position of power when watching over kids.
Nah, it's normalization of sexual assault in general
Depending on attractiveness, a woman can get away with things that a man would be arrested for
Things like that happen to adult men too, like getting someone so intoxicated they can't do anything about it (which tbf, there's surprisingly huge amount of people who think it's ok, regardless of victims gender )
I don't think it's necessarily the fantasy that's bad. I can fully understand liking a messed up fantasy. The bad part is tying that fantasy to reality and expecting it to work out well because happy brain chemicals. No stop thinking with the head between your legs, and start thinking with your heart! Why can't people just roleplay with consenting adults?
@@darkdaxterversionz Completely agreed. Yes, it's totally okay to have kinky and weird (to others) fantasies. No, it's not okay to force others into those fantasies who can't or won't consent. I'm constantly surprised by how many people seem to oppose the former, and equally surprised by how many people seem to forget the latter. Is it that difficult to distinguish fantasy and reality?
@@tasnica2438 Apparently so. You would think that the studies from Germany supporting Anonymous Therapy initiatives would prove that, but apparently not.
Aught now I gOtta know how many children have libido in this situation and why- I assume it'd be male culture to push sexual expectations onto them but I wanna know the neurology.
"he probably wanted it" yeah sure... in the moment you can feel like what's happening is a good thing, actually the person in the position of power committing the crime or abuse may be what makes the victim think it's okay, "wow my teacher is this into me, she must think I'm really mature for my age" "I must be her favorite student". But after the fact, the horror of what they had actually experienced can settle in. This is why children cannot consent. They lack the power and authority of an adult, they can't govern their own choices the same way. When one party holds an unbalanced amount of power and control over the livelihood, wellbeing, and safety of the other party it's not consensual, its a trap, it's abuse.
👌🏾
Framing it as if sex itself is some horrific regrettable act regardless of circumstance is just doing the same shit from the opposite direction, and sidesteps all the actual reasons behind the concept of consent
Focusing on making people feel bad about the act, and not on the actual realistic consequences of sex and relationships which make these values important fucks kids up- the same as those weird religious drives to push celibacy on teens
As a child molestation victim, I can confirm that this take is accurate. You might enjoy it in the moment or think it's cool or not even care at all, but as you mature, things start to click in your head and you realize what actually happened. If you're lucky, you realize this before you grow up and try to be intimate with someone else, and get the opportunity to press charges and see the other person served justice.
So whats the horror they later realise?
@@firmak2 if you don't already know you're too immature to be part of this conversation
It’s like giving a kid 2 lbs of coke. Saying “wow, what a lucky kid, I’d snort that all in one go”
Yep. People just don't understand.
@@interrobangings Agreed, it's excellent, I am using this from now on
@@satelliteprime it's a very bad analogy
I mean, I would snort that in one go but the couldn't shouldn't have it. I should :) Actually 2lbs is WAYYY too much but I would work through it like a champ....
@@paul715 How about you explain why "paul"
As a guys that got graped by woman when I was 14, I wanted to puke when I saw people say "good for him" in the comments below the article, let me tell you, it's not even slightly pleasurable, it hurts, makes you feel powerless, your whole throat goes sore, and leaves you scarred for the rest of your life, it's disgusting how people can joke about it or even say that it's good that it happened, I loathe this kind of behaviour, and I feel great pity for the boy in question
I'm sorry you had to go through that
@@Ryuko-T72 it's alright, I already dealt with it in a large capacity, though it'll never fully go away
@@krzycki9688 i call bs its funny a kid can get charged as an adult for murder but...
I haven't gone through this and I hope I won't, but sometimes, even when your pp is erect, if you press it against something it hurts, I can't imagine how it is to be r*ped by a 40 y/o woman, most likely doing so in the way that is pleasant for her and not you (if ykyk). I even heard a pp can shrink from v*ginal pressure, making it smaller and yeah I don't think it feels that good, based on what I heard about how a peach feels like, it doesn't seem to feel that good. Must be traumatic and must've made you scream.
@@ktv9247 imagine saying you "don't believe" someone else's trauma. You could have kept that to yourself instead of causing more to be put on your digital footprint.
I thought I was awesome when I was 14 and had a thing with a woman in her late 30s. After a string of failed relationships in my adult life, I learned a lot about attachment in therapy. Weird to have “mommy issues” when you have a great relationship with your mom 👀 any adult who seeks a relationship with a child is not doing it for any reason other than the P word
thank u todd howard
You are incredibly strong for sharing this! Wish you all the best!
People who write these articles need to take this kinda thing way more seriously. The fact that there's crap like this where they just talk about what she does outside of the horrible crime she committed and downplay it like a mf when, if it were a dude, that'd be priority #1 with the same journalist(s)...yuck. Absolutely disgusting.
You were abused as a child… now it makes sense why bethesda games are buggy
Todd, you lying again, hmmm?
Ayyo, they got issues.
I believe the term you're looking for is:
AY-YO, OH-AY... THEY CAPPIN'...!!!
Such is the proper vernacular.
*tissues
@Don't Read My Profile Photo shut up
🇦🇺🕳🇦🇺
Agreed!
Gotta give the journo props for all them horse puns in an article about child diddling.
No kidding. Makes me want someone to check their hard drive, but they were on point with them puns.
I'm 99% certain that every single journalist in the UK chose their career purely for the puns. You'd think an article about pedophelia would make them put the breaks on, but apparently not...
@@peaceandloveusa6656 I don't know how you can find humor in something this horrible. The level of normality on issues like this are beyond disturbing.
@@kristiannoetorres Tell me you don't understand dark humor is a coping mechanism without telling me you don't understand dark humor is a coping mechanism.
"Court, you're gonna have to cover the pedo cougar thing, but here's some good news: she's a HORSE heiress."
I was a sophomore in high school and this girl sat next to me in lunch and started rubbing my thigh and I told her to stop which she didn’t, so I walked off, I stay away from her now.
That’s good man you did the right thing
If you had done the same to her, you would have been in big trouble.
Imagine really liking a teacher, and being excited that they give you special attention. Then imagine them forcing themselves on you where your first sexual experience is completely confusing and lacking of any agency. Then your teacher, whom you adored and respected, tells you you have to live with these incredibly complicated and sick feelings of what just happened in total silence or your favorite teacher will lose their job, you'll never see them again, and it will be all your fault. Then months, even years later, some suburban dad who works at OfficeMax says you're ungrateful for daring to open up about how your childhood was destroyed by someone you trusted. No wonder kids like this end up mentally shattered.
That would be fucking awesome if she was hot. Don't be a femboy your whole life.
... fuck, sib, that's depressing, thanks for putting it into words like that, that's a new perspective for me.
Wait until she gets pregnant!
RUclips epsteiend three comments off to gitmo
You inserted "forcing themselves" as if all such relationships were violent rapes...
It makes me think of the wrestler Jake Roberts who lived through an incident like this when he was a child, and he was molested several times by his step-mother who was 21 at the time. He's very eloquently spoken when talking about the trauma/mistrust that it brought him, and it's sad that so many people's first question towards him is "was she hot?".
It's not about what you're feeling in that moment, it's about how it will effect you in the future, and how it might warp your perception of relationships!
Jake’s a great example too cause he’s been wildly successful but is fucked up in so many ways and a lot of it goes back to that experience.
Jake had such a brutal life. His father was an inces*uous molester too, and Jake dint take his daughter on his life for a long time out of fear he might act out like his dad too
@@TheMidnightSaucier Don't be dishonest, it was against his will, and Jake Roberts was mostly abused by his father
The “keep his mouth shut” irritated me for a lot of reasons. But the thing that gets me is that a lot of guys ask the question of “why don’t people care about men when they’re abused?” And that segment was the answer right there.
they only love to bring up the "what about men?" argument when it's a woman speaking out on her abuse and inequalities. and once men speak out on their abuse and inequalities, they're hit with the "man up and shut up" from those same "men's rights activist" crowd.
@@gayfield420 it’s so depressing. They think sjws or feminist or the “woke”crowd are so awful when we’re the reaction to the system. Men, white men specifically just didn’t react with us. They understand somethings wrong but they don’t understand they’re defending the problem
de diference betwin "stop braging" and "keep your problems tu yourself"
@@TomyrisTK Wow" white man" really ? And you think you're the good one?
@@krzysztofg3572 are you seriously offended rn?
"they would have to identify the body using a cotton swab."
-
my respect for you just tripled
I had a sexual interaction w a 32 year old when I was 15… she was good looking and I always tried to view It as a point of pride but now I’m 23 and I’ve always struggled w relationships… not that I cant talk to other or anything I just find It difficult. Never thought I was cool bc of my interaction but seeing this video… The double standards so beyond gross and I’m realizing I should prolly seek counseling for this issue alone. I got “lucky” like all these sickos claim but I’m struggling to foster new relationships in a situation where I do wish to form new ones. Idk if it’s because of this experience I’ve had but I’m not going to pretend like It isn’t a potential cause. I should prolly seek counseling, and it took me 8 years to realize. Thank you Shoe for enlightening me, you’re doing a truly great job. You should post more often, need voices like yours now more than ever
I hope the counseling helps man, best of luck to you
You should get counselling, I hope you are able to live a happy life man.
Sorry you had to experience it I know the feeling it ruins you in wats alot of people who weren't victims of that wouldn't understand how deep it goes
first things first change your profile pic bro
yes bro get help
This is so sick. I have a male cousins who was molested when they were young and I know how much it's messed up his life. Yes, some boys want it. But like all parents should know, just because a kid wants something in no way means it's good for them to get it.
Thank you for fighting the good fight Shoe.
Even then, a boy may want it but may not be ready for everything that comes from it. Pretty sure that is exactly how it would play out when I was that age. Something that could become very self destructive
@@gups6662 Absolutely. There is such a rapid change in boy's (and girl's) hormones at that age. Using it to take advantage of them, however they may feel about it, is disgusting. "Doing it" is a very adult action and is more than just the act. It's repercussions effect people for years, if not their entire adult lives. Trying to joke it away because, "boys want it LOL" is repulsive.
@@tigewilson6209 Shoe had it right, the guys joking about are just placing themselves in that position and not considering the aspect of being 14 but view it as themselves now. But we really need to people to use their primary head a bit more. Guys are coming around to this, but you know how dumb we can be when a women were attracted to is involved. Some of us never get out of H.S. lol. That and guys that maybe have had this type thing will joke about it as a defense mechanism
Exactly. If we decided everything a kid wants is ok, legal and acceptable then they would be eating junk food all day, drinking and driving before they turned 14 for starters. But we don't do that. Adults have a responsibility to NOT just have a kid do whatever they want but what's good for them. Let alone be complicit, endorse, enable or take advantage of the things they want to do.
@@gups6662 your right it's sad tbh
I was really emotionally toxic to girls I dated in high school because I would have flashbacks to being assaulted by a female, teenage neighbor as a kid. People have litterally told me I am like 2 different people. It is not fun and takes a lot of therapy.
similar story for me. I was 9 when a teenage girl of 16 molested and groomed me. never talked about it till I was 20, never formed any relationships with girls growing up because I would duck-out anytime things got even slightly physical. cant stand be touched by girl without feeling uncomfortable.
it fucking sucks cause I never developed the necessary relationship skills/wisdom for interpersonal relations with a significant other. 27 now and I'm the most alone ever been. I cant seem to get passed myself in this regard.
fucking sucks
@@Ahmonza that's horrifying and i'm so sorry. i reallly hope you are able to find and afford the right therapist and right kind of therapy. being alone is so hard when youre unable to deal with touch or physicality in a relationship, but there are other people out there who have similar experiences or still want relationships but also have an aversion to touch and physicalness themselves. i wouldnt know the first thing about how to find them but they exist, theres someone who understands how you feel because they feel something similar themselves, somewhere.
but i'm sure you know you need therapy for this no matter what, if you're not already in it, i really pray (in a nonreligious way) that you can get it.
again im so sorry this happened to you
@@Ahmonza don't listen to these people that keep trying to convince you you're broken just because you had some fun when you were a kid. Find a therapist you feel comfortable talking to. There's a million reasons you could be having these issues. And even if that experience is one of those reasons, it's only traumatic if you believe it to be traumatic. Don't underestimate how strong you are. You just need a therapist to show you the way.
@@Ace-pc2cm thank you I think. keep in mind I told her no many times. she did not care for my protest. I did not have "fun"
@@Ahmonza That's absolutely non-consensual in that case, but what I said still applies.
I'm a therapist and I've had many clients go through very traumatic events and come out perfectly fine, until someone years later convinces them that it was traumatic. I really fucking hate TikTok for spreading all this bullshit pop psychology that makes everyone think they're an expert when all they're doing is spreading harm. Mental illness is like something to brag about now, it's ridiculous.
You know what I love about your channel ShoeOnHead ... its where reasonable people, whether they are conservative or liberal, come to point at the crazies at either end of the spectrum and yell "NO! STOP!" It gives me hope, that things might eventually normalize ... Also your reactions are hysterical!
Indeed. Im not even liberal but I come to this channel for an occasional dose of wokeness, helps keep me balanced and sane.
Being a male survivor of child sexual abuse, I am shocked - but yet not surprised - by the number of fellow men coming forth with their own stories of being sexual abused ...
Yet, whilst I feel overwhelmed by that, I'm also touched, deeply , by the wellspring of compassion shown ... it reminds me all is far from not lost, yet, and there is loving-kindness towards victims, and survivors ...
I'd like to imagine all the people replying with creepy comments in shoe's video are predators themselves
@@nullprop Wethinks you protesteth too much?
@@nullprop What type of "creepy comments"?
I'm here with you brother. Happened to me multiple times growing up by both men and women. It's a hard thing to talk about for us men, but being open about our experiences is a step towards de-normalizing pedophilia. Thanks for being brave enough to share this!
@@pjabber5679 they mean obvious jokes.
As a 32-year-old man who teaches adolescents, I’d like to disavow what these dirty old men said 🧐
Thank you for being the bare minimum of decent adult human being. It's a lot to ask these days, it seems.
A horse heiress? That makes perfect sense why the double standard exists, she was a rich woman. She is also a neuropath?? Well of course she was.
It’s wild how you can get away with damn near anything if you’re rich
Honestly, I was fine with her getting jail time up to the Naturopath part. Now I think she must be destroyed.
@@UncommonSense-wm5fd No, she has psionic powers. She uses them to aid her predation
@@majura3743 rich and pretty.
If she was only rich she wouldn't have gotten the weirdo fans too.
@@UncommonSense-wm5fd Yeah, the disease unlocked her mutated genetic potential.
I'm also remembering the fun times (Hermesmann v. Seyer and Olivias v. Arizona) when a female rapist successfully sued her underage victim for child support. Imagine getting betrayed, manipulated, and raped by an adult you thought you could trust, then relentlessly mocked by horny men, and then sternly told by a judge "victims have rights, but in this case victims also have responsibilities" and ordered to hand over a massive portion of your paychecks for the first 20 years of your working life for the person who raped you to use as their personal fun-money fund! 😵
Alright never taking a step in Arizona if I come to the US noted.
Bro, wtf??
Predators should pay double.
Not a feminist in sight to call that out
@@tonyonaperky2128 I'm a feminist but I believe that's fucked up. Do not bring us up just because some feminists do too much.
I remember this one reddit post about a guy who got predated as a child. I cant remember the specifics of most of it, but one thing in particular made the story stick in my mind. He described experiencing a lot of shit, including a full fucking panick attack, from just visiting his hometown where it happened. Not even the specific place (if im remembering correctly), but just the town. Now imagine having trauma like that and trying to form a healthy relationship with a woman.
And then people telling you “ I bet you liked it!” So awful!
I don't know what post you saw but as a victim myself I can confirm that whatever he was saying is probably valid. A lot of people don't realize that minors are almost always coaxed into the situation that leads to the abuse. Being sexually victimized just changes how you have to go about your life in order to be comfortable.
The horse puns _alone_ should get the writer fired, blacklisted, forbidden from using any form of communication, and the soles of his feet worked over with a meat tenderizer.
without question one of the most disgusting things i’ve seen in an article recently.
Nah, he deserves a tub of salty water and some alone time with a goat.
The first pun was a lot, but then he just KEPT ON GOING and I nearly lost my mind
Neigh. I disagree that puns are bad.
No, that was the high point. Get off your high horse.. :P
The Hulu series Fosse/Verdon is one of the only depictions I’ve seen in modern media about a man who is coping with the trauma of being sexually preyed on by adult women as a boy. Shows how these experiences are abusive and can result in some people coping through substance abuse and leading to difficulty in having healthy romantic relationships. And his own male friends do the whole “lucky kid” thing when they hear the story of what happened to him. Good series overall, and I think they handled this issue responsibly for once.
I've never heard of this show but I will definitely be giving it a watch. Could be useful to use as a tool to help teach others about how difficult it is to be a victim of this type.
I need to check this out now thanks
"A Teacher" is heartbreaking but also a good watch IMO.
Perks of Being a Wallflower talks about trauma about a buy who got sexually assaulted as a kid from his aunt.
@@Steak_frites I checked this and there's a movie and a TV show about it. Which one are you referring to?
Imagine being the kid. Being confused emotionally about the whole situation and everyone online is saying he's lucky but inside he's in pain. Actually terrible
I mean I'm 14 the only reason this is totally disgusting to me is that I'm religious cause really, some mf I know would hella enjoy this
Your take on "I'm not a fan of watering down the term groomer like they did with nazi." Is the most based thing I've heard in a month
Yes people throw the term groomer around all the time.
@@owningdishonestshills7435 Yep, same as "predatory", "creepy" etc, these words are used wrongly so often but then when they should be used, they're dismissed. It's like "the boy who cried wolf" but all over the place, wrongful usage of it when it doesn't apply, then when it actually happens nobody believes it. Really is a sick world.
@@pjabber5679 You have adult women who sleep around clam the men groomed them.
@@owningdishonestshills7435 What?
@@pjabber5679 Adult sleep with adult men, they get caught, both get in trouble over it as sleeping with co workers is not allowed in that job, the woman then claims she was groomed. It has happened countless times.
I seriously question the morality of people who will defend rape of any kind
no one is defending any "rapes"
@@600795621 One participant was under the age of consent. The situation defaults to being rape. No, the kid could have literally, publicly begged for it, with thousands of sources for video evidence of it and it still would be. That's how age of consent works.
@@OzixiThrill so in major part of Europe it's not a rape, but in USA it is :D
they are pedos themselves dont you see?
@@600795621 That's just how you blueblood freaks work, i guess.
I was sexually harassed by a 40-50 year old woman once and I was 18 at the time. I still feel uneasy thinking back at it, though luckily nowhere near traumatised. I CANNOT imagine how a 14 year old boy would feel about literal rape. That shit is mentally scarring.
Exactly. They make up these dream fantasies in their minds but don’t think that it won’t be their dream partner, it will be someone they don’t want forcing themselves on them.
Was she hot? Cuz if she was, I have a slight doubt you would have found it traumatizing.
Yeah it is :/
@@andreiradu1945 mf came to this video just to add to trauma
@@andreiradu1945 i bet you're enjoyable to be around
Kids can’t consent. Keep up the great work.
Laws worldwide disagree… but you can keep telling yourself that.
@@abcdefghilihgfedcbaYou better watch your tongue before you lose it. Where I'm from saying shit like that will get you're ass beat beyond recognition. (I don't care if you're a man, woman, gay, or straight). It's never okay to diddle or beat a child what plannet do you live on?
@@abcdefghilihgfedcba???
@@abcdefghilihgfedcba laws worldwide also disagree on if the right to be legally recognized as a couple should be given to gay people, they also disagree on whether kissing someone of the same sex is grounds for stoning you to death. Your point?
@@justalonelypoteto Maybe the fact you completely made that up. Try learning the meaning of words before you use them.
I know several guys that were molested by woemn when they were kids. and all of them are not 'health' sexually. Dudes will put up a front, but it damages them. One guy I know has never had a healthy relationship, and he says point blank cuz of the babysitter that molested him. He was 13, she was in her 30s. That article really does show the double standard. Wanna bet she gets a slap on the wrists?
ya female boy rape is bad because some boys will not take it well. People should wait til they are the age of consent before exposing chilfren to this adult content.
She's rich. She could probably get her own talk show after this, and the intro would be "Hot for Teacher." I'm not exaggerating.
@@DevineInnovations I fucking hate that you're right.
@@aceous99 any boy will not take it well
This really affects you in ways that only become apparent over time. And there is no way anyone will see it from the outside. You will try to repress it as much as you can. Even the boy himself will not understand it until later a lot of the time. It hits you like a truck, the fact that you didnt actually like that situation. The person you are at 13 is drastically different from when you are 20 (including sexual maturity, which a lot of men and women seem to not be able to understand). The stats don't lie, the rate of mental issues and suicide skyrocket for victims like these once they grow up.
"Should of kept his mouth shut"
Can't imagine why male victims are afraid to speak out.
Can't imagine why male suicide rates are on the rise.
Can't imagine why the perception of healthy relationships continues to get worse and worse.
Its almost like men are humans too!
Should have. No where in English is it "should of" ... it's should have or maybe should've. Never, at any point is the language "should of" as you quote.
2:32
Woman: *commits rape*
New York Post: YASS GIRLBOSS
You are amazing and I love your straight to the point attitude. Thank you so much for standing up for the victims who are sexually molested by either a teacher or a parent or someone else they trust
I was xually assaulted by a woman as a child. I was maybe 9 and simply didn't have the toolkit to even understand what had happened.
I thought my parents would be mad and didn't tell a soul until I was an adult. (My parents are unbelievably decent people, and absolutely would not have been mad at me)
ya female boy rape is bad because some boys will not take it well. People should wait til they are the age of consent before exposing chilfren to this adult content.
I feel you. I was 6 when a friend of the family decided to introduce x-time and physical abuse. She (21 at the time) was the trusted family friend and one point tried to kidnap me. Being Hispanic was told that what being a man was, also men do not kiss and tell (This was the 1970's). That set how I dealt with relationship in the future. For the longest time with abusive females. This changed when my daughters were x abused (At the same age I was) by their mother's boyfriend, after their mother and I broke up (I was oversea with the military), did I get help. Granted it was during my daughters therapy treatment I broke down. For those closet pedo's supporters. At 14 both boy's and girls are having feels, if girls did not we would not have the underage mother issue we have today, does not mean they are ready. They looking for someone to accept them and show them affection. It is victimizes like you encourage others to bring pain into someone else's life.
@@l01230123 right? It's always hilarious the dudes who think that they got molested as a young boy and somehow didn't have it affect their emotional and sexual development. News flash: it did. They're just too lacking in self-awareness to be fully cognizant of how it affected them. That might sound condescending, and I honestly don't care. It's basic psychology.
@@l01230123 Not 'all'. 'Most' would probably be better term here. Then again I just avoid universal quantifiers when referring to people.
See, it's stuff like "I didn't have the toolkit" that makes me so angry when people oppose sex-ed being taught in schools.
If you're a kid and someone rapes you but you don't even know what sex is, let alone that an adult doing it to you is taking advantage of you, how do you even express that? It's why so much of the child testimony around this is told in euphamisms and in ways adults have to interpret. Not to mention that it's again worse for men in this respect because most sex-ed still defines rape as penerative.
I was 13 when my dad got a prostitute for me, I was in a foreign country with him on a business trip. Him and a business partner of his pressured me into going through with it doing the whole "Oh you're so lucky! I would have loved if my dad did this for me when I was your age" thing. I wanted to "be a man" and was attracted to her (very beautiful Chinese lady of the night) so I went through with it, afterwards I did the whole scrubbing myself in the shower "oh God I'm so unclean, what did I do!?" cliché. It still affects me to this day 22 years later and has contributed a lot to my feelings of hypervigilance/trust issues and self loathing.
Sorry to hear this. May I ask; how is the relationship towards your dad now? And did your mom know about it?
For me it would be a reason to ditch such family members.
Oh dude, nice. Big trouble in little china. Awesome.
I didn’t get a prostitute, I was just molested 🤷🏼♂️ Anyways yeah all that stuff you mentioned sucks.
Sorry that you went through it, but I'm glad you're able to speak about it cuz people need to hear it. People literally gaslight teenage boys into liking sexual activities they were forced into. Of course that's gonna leave a serious mark, and people need to know.
@@steffimaier7297 I'm an open book so it's no problem. My relationship with my father is the best it ever has been, oddly enough, though I still feel a deep dread and unease around him. My mother was no Saint either, my parents were way overdue for a divorce and it was better for the both of them. My mother did find out, she could tell that I was very quiet and distant after we got home. I ended up telling her which was hard since I was threatened about not to say anything. They hated each other before that but that moment is when it went septic.
@@BlitzkriegBryce " I ended up telling her which was hard since I was threatened about not to say anything" So basically, your dad knew what he did was fucked up so he threatened you? Sorry, but what type of threat? if you don't mind my asking-- just super messed up i couldn't imagine my relationship recovering after all that.
I've been s3xually assaulted several times by women. When I plucked up the courage to tell people in positions of responsibility (university staff/work manager) I was either laughed at or got eye rolls and told to "get a life". With the job incident, when the woman found out (gold knows how) I complained about her, she made false allegations about me, which were ofc taken seriously right away and I was put through hell for months till I just quit. Most of my male friends have also been assaulted by women. But men are the ones constantly told how awful they are and how all women are victims of us terrible men . The hypocrisy regarding this issue is infuriating. Thank you Shoe for highlighting this.
Thank you for sharing your experience💔 I'm so sorry you went through that
Well, at least now you know how it works. There's a lot of victim blaming so you're actually better off just getting therapy and avoid putting yourself in the same situation again. :(
How did those assaults look like? What constituted them?
It's just crazy how widespread and normalized sexual assault done by women is. I have so many stories I can tell about it. Similarly to violence (hitting etc) we don't seem to teach girls about boundaries like how we do with boys. It's quite unfortunate. And there is nothing we can do about it if it does happen, in fact we can easily be lied about and have it be turned around despite us being the victims. I know that most women are good people, but I have noticed some behavior that even the good ones partake in simply because they are just unaware that it isn't OK. Really don't know how this will be solved.
Doubt it.
I am so glad Nux Taku reacted to you. I never heard of you prior and your takes are quite refreshing to hear.
I support calling people groomers if they are normalizing sex with 14-year-old children.
I'm glad, because they are by definition
I CALL THE PEOPLE SHOW SPECIFICALLY CALLED OUT HYPOCRITES
GROOMERS WHEN GAY
LUCKY WHEN MALE
Agreed!
I know more guys who were sexually assaulted in college than weren't, and not one of us has reported anything to anyone. Just last week one of my friends brought up how he got too drunk and woke up to his ex going down on him. I had experienced almost exactly the same thing, so I wanted to support him, but the other guys just made the typical jokes about how there are worse ways to wake up and how he had to have liked it. I've avoided/lost many relationships due to sexual trauma, and seeing the cycle perpetuated like this is heartbreaking.
Guys, we have to support each other and abolish these notions that girls can do what they want and that we should be grateful for whatever we get. This machismo horndog bullshit has got to go.
I was eighteen. Thanks McGee.
I've been in a similar position. And I believe guys act like that because that's how society tells them too and they know they won't be taken seriously, so they deal with it by making a joke if it. You're right, It does have to stop
Sorry you and your friends etc went through all that, that's fucked up. I hope dudes everywhere can start taking the shit seriously, and also that women can recognize and support the dudes, too. @__@!
They were “ex” at the time? Or it was his current girlfriend? Because I don’t think that’s actually bad.
@@nathanbarnhart7823 ahh, cause couples do not need to consent obviously.
Underaged girls can "enjoy it" or "be willing" too, and it's clear to see why that doesn't matter. It's not okay to r*** underaged boys or girls, end of story.
People who say things "statutory rape shouldn't apply when it's a boy" and "little boys can consent" absolutely need their hard drives checked
I'm convinced the person writing that was some catholic priest on trial because of a certain incident because holy shit how are you that out of touch
As a survivor of this kind of thing; I can say, this disgusts, and angers me to a level that is impossible to express
First of all, I'm sorry for your experience and huge respect for being a survivor. Secondly, I've never even had any significant experience with sexual assault, and the comments disgust me too. I find it hard to key into that level of un-empathy, even if they're just being "edgy"
did you manage to survive ligma?
It worries me to think about how many of these people actually do not care to understand the difference between "consent" and "desire".
Just had basically this argument today. Always amazes me how many people a) will perform acrobatics to justify a double standard when it favors them and b) suddenly have problems with double standards when it doesn't favor them.
Really gross. Just don't be attracted to minors. It's easy.
Spot on! I see this kinda thing all the time in political discussions, and whenever you point it out, there’s always an excuse. “No, it’s different because x, what they did was truly bad.”
Except for the last sentence I completely agree. Curing the attraction to minors if you have it doesnt Sound terribly easy. I feel compation to anyone that doesnt act on it but seeks help.
@@spirit959ful Totally agree. I can't conceive of the idea of changing the things I'm attracted to. Luckily not minors, but I've got some weird kinks I'd rather not have. If someone finds some magic "no more pedos" pill/therapy/camp, I've got a few annoying kinks that would be easier not to have. Let me know, i'll test if it works on other annoying attractions!
what acrobatics?
I can’t believe it’s hard to get that boys can have sexual trauma too.
As a man, I was disgusted by that article. I can't imagine the years of awkwardness that are gonna haunt that kid. She looks fucking crazy on top of that are you kidding me!? Also anyone who said "where was she when I was blablabla years old" should be checked up on honestly, like dude get a hold of yourself
This holy shit this
“We need to find this boy so we can give him the ‘luckiest boy in America award’”
You know this is bad when South Park has the moral high ground.
As a male sexual assault victim, this is cruelty. Male or female, it doesn't matter. It is grooming
All the people supporting such a thing, haven't had it happen to them, and they are literally living in a Manga/anime fantasy. Because they can only view it in the form of fantasy/fetish at this point, they can't understand the real world ramifications. It's really disturbing that people think that way.
@@kennylaysh2776 the people thinking it would be soo awesome if it were them have probably never had sex with a real woman, only their right hands
It's literally not grooming, it's outright r@pe. It's literally a kid. Call it by what it is, r@pe by a nonce.
@@kennylaysh2776 As much as I despise the people trying to excuse the events, I'd like to play devil's advocate here.
The people trying to make excuses could have been victims themselves, and by downplaying the events as a "lucky break" for the child, they are trying to convince themselves of the validity of the claims. That being the mindset that the kid wasn't abused, but fortunate, because if they admitted that the kid was abused, they would have to face the reality that they were abused, weak, vulnerable and most importantly betrayed by someone they trusted too much.
And that is my devil's advocate case; Do I buy it? Obviously not. But it's a distinct possibility that popped into my head here.
Man reading comments I almost end up crying , hope the ones who were victim , get better soon ..
I never was SA but kind of ...touched and bullied.. so i don't know if it counts but just don't devalue these things and take it seriously and vent/get help with people who actually care .
I always find it weird when people pretend that they understand the experience of someone who's gone through something they haven't. It's like assuming a woman should be okay with rape because you fantasize about rough sex. There's an astronomically huge gap between your personal fantasy and someone's lived hellish experience.
Even if the boy *did* enjoy it, there's a non-zero chance that it's going to completely skew his views on relationships, dating, and sex, particularly if she was his first. There's a chance he's going to assume that all women want is to have sex four times a day and have no commitment or relationship beyond that. That's going to really mess him up if he ever dates a girl his own age, or any woman who isn't simply just a sexual predator. He's going to wonder why she's withholding sex, and why she wants to go on dates and get to know him and spend time together and develop a relationship.
or it might not? Since you said in the beginning pretending to experience someone else's experience? No teacher should be having sex with students, but the worst possible outcome doesn't always happen. males are less emotionally attach to sex than women so maybe he be fine. Im sorry I just don't like one sided absolute thinking.
Agreed. Also, there's an astronomically huge gap between having a fantasy and actually realizing a similar situation because, lets be honest, real life rarely lives up to fantasy. When I was a kid, I used to fantasize about being alone in a survival situation. I'm pretty sure it wouldn't have been the greatest thing ever to have happened to me if I really was, say, in a plane crash and had to survive completely alone. The fantasy was just that. Escapism in my room while I waited for my mom to tell me dinner was ready...
It's also an authority figure. You CAN walk away from a sexual assault, or an imbalanced relationship without baggage if you did enjoy it. It's just not typical, and there's always residue from anything you experience. It will change the way you interact with authority figures, workplace relationships, and pleasure. It can skew the way you feel about pleasure.
"It was pleasurable, that means I can't complain. I don't have any scars, so let's just stay in this bad situation."
@@ladyville3 child molestation victim here, bad take. You're gonna have to just trust me when I tell you that there is a 100% chance he will experience negative consequences for this his entire life. It really doesn't matter what gender you are or what gender you like, being raped or molested at any age will fuck with you for life. The only things that differ between individuals is how exactly it fucks with you and the frequency at which it does.
@@kailgale part of that is that people have a weird tendency to fantasy they're more capable or more in control than they really are, while everything is an idealized version of people and/or events.
that's assuming they even actually understand what they think they want, which is a whole other mess to deal with
Good job, Shoe, you nailed it.
Speaking as someone who was sexually abused as a child... it does not go well for people as they grow up.
As a British person I’m so glad to see Americans adopt the word “nonce,” it’s definitely one of the best things we’ve invented
@Jamal Ramadan US would've been better if it was never colonized probably
@Jamal Ramadan inventing the US isn’t a good thing tho
@Jamal Ramadan and how did that invention go?
@Jamal Ramadan makes sense, as an American the place is meh 5/10
@Jamal Ramadan their
Just never stop. A bad day is easily turned upside down when I watch any of your content
This is more of a second hand story, but I remember this instance where a substitute at my high school noncon-ed one of the students over the weekend and a bunch of guys went up to him and did the whole "nice bro" and "you're so lucky" shtick. It was so disgusting seeing that shit, especially when he didn't even look like he enjoyed it, yet they kept going. She was immediately fired and no one remembered her outside of the coomer dude bros who were cheering him on.
I had a P incident with a previous babysitter when I was five, I'd love to see how these pedo defenders would spin that.
Man.....
"what a young stud" 🤮
They probably wouldn't. It's crazy some people still have some shame and a sliver of sense to not think toddlers are sex-oriented but admitting to their faults and depraved behaviour is way too difficult. Not like living with "being lucky". The better thing you can do is live well bro, wishing you the best
Are you okay now?
@@KarmasAB123 for the most part, but it's not something that I can forget and I do have problems, like I have to be in control, while being intimate.
This is disgusting. My friend was one of those boys who was targeted by his teacher. He still at 50 is still screwed up. So no these women should be in prison.
Ah, time for the annual “join shoe for a sequel we were hoping we wouldn’t need”
Can’t wait for when this inevitably becomes a trilogy. Maybe I’ll have faith in humanity left to lose!
I was a goofy kid that wanted to play in the creek and climb trees. I'm glad my innocence was intact and not ruined by some predator.
Like the tree from Evil Dead?
sounds good. i wasn't so lucky :(
@@spargomcdicky9177wanna talk about it?
@@spargomcdicky9177 same :(, but the least we can do now is try our best to make sure other in our lives dont go through the same or similar trauma
Most predators will not search for you by the Creek or in the trees. Most predators are totally socially integrated and are people near to their victims with their parents trust. Stranger danger should be the least of parents worries. It is good to warn children against unwanted behaviour instead. Teach them to say no, teach them to get help. Show them that you take them serious without drama.
"where was she when i was 14.."
Well.. I met mine when I was 8.. Yes I "Wanted", and it's easier to think that it was partly my choice, but it fucked me up a lot, not just for the act itself being too early .But for the inevitable breakup that needed to occur. My mind was not fully developed to deal with that amount of feelings. Being so close with someone, feeling like that person cared about you and then one day it's gone, because she got bored, to this day I have a hard time with my personal relationships... always afraid of beeing abandoned.
^this
Stop blaming all your problems on something that happened years ago and seek professional help. Nothing is ever traumatizing unless you believe it to be traumatizing.
@@Ace-pc2cm that's a really shitty, ignorant take
@@Ace-pc2cm i think you're on the wrong video for this, bud
@@Ace-pc2cm you are a horrible human being
If you're too young to REFUSE, you're too young to consent.
Maybe if it was called the "age of refusal", people would start
taking it a little more seriously...
...probably not, but maybe.
The fact that they’re making puns in the damn article shows a blatant disregard for just how serious this is. It’s just funny to them, haha, something to laugh at, hilarious!
God I hate humanity.
Not humanity. The NYPost
“Horsing around” “saddled with charges”
There is a strong double standard regarding rape. I was molested at 14 and when I spoke up and they asked me if I was gay because I didn't enjoy it. It was an awful experience.
I am male and have a twin sister. I asked my abuser one time why he chose to do this with me and not with my twin sister. He answered that he obviously couldn’t, because she was a little girl and that would be wrong. Then I asked him why it would be any different with me because technically I am the younger one. He never seemed to have realised that before.
He pretty much has the mindset of the people shoe was referring to in this video. Hope you're doing ok now
Boys and girls ARE different... but they're not different enough to justify this, WTF 🤣
Can you imagine being a child who was traumatized by some creepy old lady and everyone in news articles are commenting that you wanted it/were lucky
This is the same thing men hear as an adult if they are raped. I was left with serious psychological damage. I was 21, and in the 17 years since only one person has empathized, the rest of the reactions and comments comments are the same, "but was she hot?" "You probably liked it" etc... say those things to a woman after that experience.
@@flyoverkid55 i was young and dumb, drinking at a party. A girl approached me repeatedly trying to pick up on me, I constantly declined her actions and verbal requests, telling her I had a girlfriend. She didn't drink at all, she had a sober lifestyle. I ended up going to bed drunk alone and woke up with her in my bed. I was told by others in the house that she was quite loud... she had either woke me up or just used me while i was sleeping, I was blacked out at this point and dont remember any of it.
@@flyoverkid55the woman can manipulate, use weapons or get the man drunk. She could be super obese and on top of him. Or she's really muscular. It's really not hard to imagine many many ways.
It amazes that these males who are conservatives, who constantly rail against pedophilia and grooming, are fine with a 14 year old boy being raped by an adult woman. If an adult woman is sexually attracted to a 14 year old, there is something extremely wrong with her. This is probably one the best videos I've ever seen from you, Shoe...
Kinda assuming they're conservatives instead of degenerates that watch futa pern. That's much more likely.
This world is fucked up buddy... People can't be coherent with something for more than 2 seconds, it's awful
İt's because they don't care about Pedophilia. The reason they pretend they are against grooming is because they can pretend that Drag shows and trans people are grooming kids. İt was never about the kids.
@@mahmutcankaya3321 It's really funny you think that. Kinda sad and thoughtless but really funny.
I'm conservative and I am very surprised and unhappy to see that.
Pornography has destroyed our cultures' sense of decency.
So true
Nah, if we had been decent to begin with porn would never have become popular.
I believe porn was born from the need of those unwilling to rise up the first step. And people with ambitions saw this opportunity.
@seraphim9429 no, people like to screw so they like watching other people screw. It's not that deep.
FACTS
I love that Australian journalists are so focussed on making puns that they forgot it was a story about a child being raped multiple times.
It was a new yorker article.
It's not that boys and girls are traumatized by different things... It's that they are traumatized in different ways by the SAME things. There was an interview with a boy who had been abused by a female teacher. He said every thought revolved around "when will I get time with her? Will I get to see her today? Does she want to have sex again?" He said all he could think about was the next time it was going to happen. He was devastated when she didn't speak to him, or paid attention to other students. But she kept stringing him along. He said it ruined him mentally. He doesn't think about things like normal people do anymore. It's a fascinating interview.
Link to the interview?
Link to the interview?
Link to the interview? - mico
@markieshome I've been trying to find it and I can't. It was on TV, back when investigative journalism actually happened.
if he was raped, he wouldn't be "so happy to see her again." a lot of men spoke about their traumatizing experience that destroyed them, afraid, feeling shame, they did feel this too
When I was 7 my first baby sitter tought me "how to please a woman" multiple times, even to the point of forcefully making out with me, at the time I thought nothing of it. I'm in my late 30s and still have issues because of it.
Oh my god...
I am so so sorry that happened to you. All I want to say is that I wish it were possible to hug your inner child. I can't imagine how confusing and scary that must have been.
Anything about harming children just tears my heart apart and...you were so young 💔
I hope you're doing alright and that you're taking care of yourself.
Best regards.
She needs to go in the Woodchipper feet first.
Same thing happened but it was my aunt instead and i also have issues with it
What are your issues?
@@abcdefghilihgfedcba can't get off in bed with any of my partners, end up with blue balls instead every time.
6:10 Great observation here. The guy typed "Young men" instead of "Young boys" because he knew how hypocritical he would sound🤦♂
I am a male that was routinely sexually molested by women in their 30s & 40s. It started when I was 13. You might say, I was an "apt pupil". Friends told friends and I reaped the rewards. If an exceptionally good-looking woman came to get me to "help" with something, my father would even pull me off the tractor. Chest all puffed out, "that's MY boy".
What in the actual hell! The fact that your friends and dad encouraged this to go on is just infuriating!
what the actual fuck… i’m so sorry..
Man wtf. I hope you're okay now
Wow dude.
THANK YOU!! There are survivors and male victims who don't get to express themselves about their experiences. I hate how our society has such a gross double standard. Thank you so much for addressing this! ❤️🙌
Yep, along with the countless other anti-male double standards.
@@pjabber5679 Unfortunately it's a double standard enforced by a lot of men. Dudes who are cumbrained and project their fantasies onto minors.
@@pinkkfloydd No, its actually not.
It's a double standard enforced by women as well, but its really primarily enforced by feminists.
Hate to break it to you, but feminist have created rape laws where "forced to penetrate" doesn't count as rape. Feminists have done this and other things to destroy the idea that men don't get raped. In ancient times there were actually stories of men getting raped, like lot and his daughters.
So no, its not men who enforce this, although on internet comments sections ut might seem that way.
@@pjabber5679 time and a place dude. time and a place. If you feel that way then make groups and lobby the government for equal custody laws and equal money for prostate cancer.homeless shelters etc etc , I would support it but you need to create the infrastructure first
@@DanielGreen-bx4wr infrastructure gets attacked even at the forming level kinda hard to do it then
When I was a boy I was blown by one of my mothers friends. I had no idea what was going on. It fucked me and my life up until I was in my 40s and finally got through it. This stuff sounds like a fantasy to some people, but it is likely to lead to psychological issues. Took me until 44 to be able to have a stable relationship.
As someone who was SA’d but definitely manipulated months before the official act I hate this trend. I did keep my mouth shut for years and am still recovering from the scars.
This is the mindset I used to have as a kid, when you grow up in as society that tells you men are the superior sex, than a women can never have power over male and thus never rape him, it's a fundemental misunderstanding of power dynamics. Same logic is applied to male domestic abuse victims, they're told to man up because they're the stronger sex.
Same shit happens with white people and the term white privilege being thrown at them constantly.
As if white working class people (who are the majority of white people) are privileged. Just because they're less disadvantaged than a black working class woman doesn't mean they're privileged at all. They're both just different types of disadvantaged. But now people have it in their head that any and all white men have privileges and no 'real problems'.
A rich women will ALWAYS have the power dynamic over any working class man. A rich white women actually has access to white privilege, and can use and abuse that. Power dynamics are not like the stone ages...
@@mousysaint9143 As a socialist I agree, race comes with its own disadvantages but the biggest divider is class, concepts like race based discrimination were specifically built to have the working class fight amongst thenselves, worker soldarity should come before anything else.
Domestic abuse is slowly going in the right direction. Johnny Depp won the trial over Amber Heard. But we've still got a very long way to go to treat women the same way as men and not go easy on them for extremely awful things, as evident with how this woman is being treated for r@ping a child.
@@InfernoYeet whut
@@aceous99 I was replying to someone, they deleted their comment
I was one of these people who were saying “lucky kid.” Not proud of it, I didn’t realize how much it fucked them up later in life. The kid is 14, he doesn’t know wtf he wants and that older teacher was taking advantage of that. It’s fucked
ya female boy rape is bad because some boys will not take it well. People should wait til they are the age of consent before exposing chilfren to this adult content.
Hey I was clubbing shagging taking drugs everything when I was 14 but i still think she was in the wrong
Glad you've learned about the damage it causes. Hopefully, we can help spread it to the rest of society and accurately call out how horrifying the actions of these p3d0s truly are. There should be no double standard when it comes to this shit.
@@aceous99 *woman
The only ethical age of consent is 25. Any other age is arbitrary.
as a kid, I used to wish so badly that something like that would happen to me.. as an adult I now see the issue entirely as I was assaulted, can’t imagine how traumatizing it is for a growing child
When I was 15 I got used up by a 24 year old college student. She would come to my high school with no identification etc. walk right in and pick me up. My friends were giving me high fives and the staff at the high school 100% knew what was going on but did nothing but smile at us. It took awhile for me to understand what actually happened. Once I learned the hard way it is not cool at all.
stop flexing
If you're told enough times that you're a victim, eventually you start to believe it. That's the true sad moral of your story. And as a therapist I can confirm this. You CAN be traumatized not by an event but by people convincing you that you should be traumatized by it. Same reason you don't get sad and worried when kids fall.
@@Espectador666 weird
@@Ace-pc2cm whether you do or don't believe or feel that you are a victim has no effect on if you actually are or not. If I start trying to beat someone up, it doesn't matter if it hurts them or not, they are still a victim of assault.
@@dimwitgang5544 It absolutely fucking does. I'm a therapist. I've had so many clients that were perfectly fine after a "traumatic event" and only got affected by it years later once someone convinced them they were a victim.