Absolutely correct. Best to avoid getting to attached or involved with anyone including family members that are interested in mind control for their own manipulative benefits.
I swear you always put out the best videos/topics, Tamara! We were cut-off by some family members when we stood up for ourselves and established boundaries. Rather than just chase after them when we got silent treatment, we went about our life which has basically led us down the path of no-contact. They haven't contacted us and we haven't contacted them. It's been over a year since we have communicated more than a sentence. It seems so juvenile at times but I don't want to enable the behavior either. I still have some guilt doing this since this has inadvertantly affected numerous other family members. I never expected we would need to stand up to people that we once deeply respected. It is unfortunate how things have turned out.
Thank you so much for that!! Glad to have you and everyone else on this channel. I'm glad you mentioned standing up for yourself and setting boundaries which resulted in cut-offs. This happens so much. It's hurtful but it also shows you that you are making the right decision once you make it. As you state, it is unfortunate. But, in the end, you may gain a lot of peace.
I'm experiencing this evil dark force in my family. My 3 adult sons are under mind control from their covert malignant narcissistic mother. One recently committed suicide and the other two have had their minds destroyed by the extreme gaslighting. Never underestimate these evil characters.
I'm so sorry to hear of your son. That's heart breaking. Being a child of similar parents and dynamics, i can tell you how much it would've helped to have at least one family member see it for what it is.
Im up at 3 in the morn super sleepy and can't sleep because this video triggered an awakening within me. Every 10 min of this video your commentary and hearing other people's stories really hit home for me. I salute you all and Tamara thank you so much
Such a good video. Some of the things they do are so subtle that you question yourself about whether what they are doing is normal behaviour and its just you reading too much into it. My sister has controlled everyone in the family for years and then my parents have controlled me to ignore it because they don't want to have to deal with my sister or any behaviour that they don't like. She has studied psychology, which adds another dimension to the situation, and uses it to analyse everything to confirm she knows best because she's qualfied. Four years after getting a life of my own I'm still a ruminator and validation hunter - sometimes you just want someone to validate your feelings about the abuse becasue the abuse is so subtle you struggle to believe your own feelings. It's such a mind mess!! Thank you for your great video's Tamara ❤
Thank you!! And you're welcome. So glad this was helpful. That's so sad and I'm sorry. What truly makes her "qualified" is understanding that firstly, a degree in psychology is not enough to have the "skills" that most people think you do, and secondly, any behavior she is using isn't "psychological prowess" but rather manipulation which most humans can do. Sounds like an ego trip that doesn't make sense. In essence, I'm saying that there may be nothing to worry about here because it seems rather ameturish that she would "use" her understanding to harm you or others. That's certainly pure manipulation, not skill. I'm sorry.
@@TherapistTamaraHillthank you for your reply. I agree and with the help of therapy I belive that the control and manipulation stems from jealousy, which I think originates from when I was born over 50 years ago. She uses her psychology qualification to insinuate that she's better than everyone else in identifying manipulation tactics and that you are stupid to not listen to her because she has a degree. Now I understand a lot of it is projection!
I am your fan ... I have seen your videos..for many months .. I love your color and also your knowledge. You are a great professional. ❤❤❤❤I I say all this respectfully. I am proud of you. ❤
Oh wow I wish I could have caught the live! My step mom's vibe is always putting out bad vibes! Very controlling, very selfish and turning my family against me!
We love listening to Tamara Hill in any condition. If she had just stepped out of the shower and was wrapped in a towel with dripping hair, we'd still be happy that she's talking.
Same concept of “children are seen, not heard”. My family feels I give my children too much leeway because I allow them to express themselves but I will correct if disrespectful. I’m not going to tell them what they’re feeling isn’t valid, I explain the way it’s being expressed. I inform you can verbalize a dislike with a sharp tone without raising your voice, getting violent physically but through communication with the range of our voices. My family can’t stand this. My children are either going to appreciate what I am doing or they will go against me like my oldest daughter have done. That’s ok whenever if ever she comes back, my door will be open. Since she was a little girl she never wanted to be punished for her behavior and she wanted to be the only child. She would falsely claim abuse, have others call ACS cases were always dismissed. She was diagnosed with Oppositional Disorder (it’s longer but I forgot) but it’s been going on for a long time. I have made decisions that weren’t the best that affected her and I’ve apologized, I took accountability and I attempted to work with moving forward but it takes all parties to want the same thing. I’m not perfect and being a young parent I put a lot on her, I acknowledged this and it hurts me that it affected her the way it has. I had to step away to protect my minor children now. It’s heartbreaking.
Same concept of “children are seen, not heard”. My family feels I give my children too much leeway because I allow them to express themselves but I will correct if disrespectful. I’m not going to tell them what they’re feeling isn’t valid, I explain the way it’s being expressed. I inform you can verbalize a dislike with a sharp tone without raising your voice, getting violent physically but through communication with the range of our voices. My family can’t stand this. My children are either going to appreciate what I am doing or they will go against me like my oldest daughter have done. That’s ok whenever if ever she comes back, my door will be open.
Ok - i just want to say something on a happy note- the Olympic games- I’m not into sports but I watched some swimming finals this evening- amazing and people from all over the world- like here.
35:50 I am sorry to hear that, thought Deb&kid are getting along okay.. I am not talking about this case, but I have an idea that some parents are over-controlling (control too many minor things) and a bit self-inerrant-righteous - critical about the mistakes their kids make (point out and shame kids for small mistakes, if their child forgot something). But we all are getting older and at some point the parent will become fragile and will have a bad memory, slow reaction, and will be treated the same way by their kids (raised to be intolerant for one's mistakes and critical of others). this is sad, be more forgiving smthng smthng 18:27 Dam I used to do this - after the last devaluation and invented accusations I kept listening and liking the songs she posted while I knew that it wasn't going anywhere and she was showing that my attention is unwanted, at the same time trying to portray love to another user and, as it turned out, privately speaking with many others instead of blocking me. It was stupid to think that I deserve some explanation, but thanx to that experience I found out about cluster B. recollecting past events makes me sad
Is it common for these families to use religion to control? I’ve been processing my own family trauma and cptsd and came to this realization in my own recently and trying to deconstruct. I’m so confused and it’s really difficult bc it feels like they used this to control me
This is a really good question! Yes, indeed. You may hear things like "honor your mother and father," "God says you are not supposed to sin and divorce," and/or "offer them the other cheek." These scriptures are important but within its proper context. Abuse of religion is a common "sin" in these families.
@@TherapistTamaraHillI think I somewhat suspected and knew this and have started using doing this on my own - but understanding in this context is SO helpful. THANK YOU. you are a gift.
Also my grandma cut one of her sons out of her will (he had a lot of issues and did do some bad stuff but still) I am thinking this was her final power play
My father has ‘histrionic’ traits. So does his mother, grandmother, & brothers. I dislike the term histrionic bc of sexism, but the traits don’t lie. In my family, it stems from chronic child abuse that each parent/child passes down to the next. Awful cycle. This society allowing the scapegoating & brainwashing of women is 1 of the biggest reasons my grandmother developed these traits, i think. So, the label histrionic is basically sexism upon sexism. My great grandmother had to raise her daughter alone bc her family shunned her for having a premarital affair with a married man. Her daughter grew up with no father. Great grandma abused her daughter relentlessly, mind controlling her too. Her daughter had 3 kids, whom the great grandma mind-controlled. She did it to me too. Great grandma was also a child whose family immigrated to america in the 1920s, presumably after italy became a fascist state. Her family was scapegoated & socially outcast for being from italy & not having much money. My point is: this society causes these disorders by torturing people, scapegoating them, attempting to control their minds, & then further scapegoats us by labeling us as histrionic or borderline or sociopathic. Then it’s difficult/near impossible to get proper treatment, since society is so trigger happy at scapegoating people who have serious mental disorders. Meanwhile, the capitalistic eliteist regime that runs this society gets to brainwash whoever they want & ruin peoples lives for profit. Nobody stopping them or critiquing them for their weaponization of technology & psychology for mass mind control & narcissistic abuse. This society does not protect children & it is not meant to be safe for children, it is meant to make money for the rich, bottom line. Anything that gets in the way of profit is a burden, which means that children are comodified & brainwashed for profit. Many parents are mind-controlled by their jobs & the ever-unstable economy into behaving this way too. Anyway, i think that histrionic behavior could stem from the chronic trauma of mind-control that is generationally inherited, & also that which is omnipresent in society with capitalists controlling everything, engineering culture, constant harassment of the mind & body, etc.
Please send me some tegardings for I Always see your videos . Your very intelligent ... amazing . Good professional .. I suffer from bipolar disorder ❤
My sister is with a narc and she has become narcy herself. And they have my prescious empath daughter! I want her back. I pray to God daily. My mom is doing this with my sister now. I think my mom is doing black magic on us. When I distance myself my sister is suddenly under my mums control. How do I get away from this when they have my girlie. Its like I will leave soon cause they will give my girlie ADHD. I just feel it. They are mentally sick all of them and they have bad diet too. And they think they are healthy😂😳 are they controlled by enteties? Or is it the vaccines that has made it worse? My mom is not connected to God either.
That's a good question. I've never heard of passive abuse. I would assume it is abuse that doesn't appear, to the outside world, is not happening. Almost like what I talked about tonight which was "covert manipulators." Passive-aggressive is basically the same. Things are being done to you but the abuser will never admit it. You sense a deep-seeded anger or resentment on their part, but they will never admit it.
Hello friends! To see my live chat from the day after this one, on the "Silent Epidemic," click here: ruclips.net/user/liveZcpVm-Hl8lE
Mind control exists within all areas of society! Home care workers, nursing homes, family members, employers. , healthcare professionals. Etc
Yes, very true! Good point.
Absolutely correct. Best to avoid getting to attached or involved with anyone including family members that are interested in mind control for their own manipulative benefits.
Government, media, film, propaganda, religions, churches, etc too 😮. The damage is catostrophic. Mind control is a huge threat to humanity
I swear you always put out the best videos/topics, Tamara! We were cut-off by some family members when we stood up for ourselves and established boundaries. Rather than just chase after them when we got silent treatment, we went about our life which has basically led us down the path of no-contact. They haven't contacted us and we haven't contacted them. It's been over a year since we have communicated more than a sentence. It seems so juvenile at times but I don't want to enable the behavior either. I still have some guilt doing this since this has inadvertantly affected numerous other family members. I never expected we would need to stand up to people that we once deeply respected. It is unfortunate how things have turned out.
Thank you so much for that!! Glad to have you and everyone else on this channel.
I'm glad you mentioned standing up for yourself and setting boundaries which resulted in cut-offs. This happens so much. It's hurtful but it also shows you that you are making the right decision once you make it. As you state, it is unfortunate. But, in the end, you may gain a lot of peace.
@@CamGoesCamping agreed she’s amazing AMAZING
I'm experiencing this evil dark force in my family. My 3 adult sons are under mind control from their covert malignant narcissistic mother. One recently committed suicide and the other two have had their minds destroyed by the extreme gaslighting.
Never underestimate these evil characters.
I'm so sorry to hear of your son. That's heart breaking. Being a child of similar parents and dynamics, i can tell you how much it would've helped to have at least one family member see it for what it is.
🖤
Im up at 3 in the morn super sleepy and can't sleep because this video triggered an awakening within me. Every 10 min of this video your commentary and hearing other people's stories really hit home for me. I salute you all and Tamara thank you so much
That's wonderful to hear!! I'm sorry though for interfering with your rest🤭 Maybe this is good though in the long run!
@@TherapistTamaraHill yes it was very worth it in the long run and I appreciate your professional insight
😊Thanks!
Yes indeed, all you have said is the absolute truth! I realized that people want something "from" me that they would not "give" to me!
That's a good point.
I have been going throug a toxic relationship .. it is really hard to deal with it
Yes, it is. I'm sorry. 😟
Such a good video. Some of the things they do are so subtle that you question yourself about whether what they are doing is normal behaviour and its just you reading too much into it. My sister has controlled everyone in the family for years and then my parents have controlled me to ignore it because they don't want to have to deal with my sister or any behaviour that they don't like. She has studied psychology, which adds another dimension to the situation, and uses it to analyse everything to confirm she knows best because she's qualfied. Four years after getting a life of my own I'm still a ruminator and validation hunter - sometimes you just want someone to validate your feelings about the abuse becasue the abuse is so subtle you struggle to believe your own feelings. It's such a mind mess!! Thank you for your great video's Tamara ❤
Thank you!! And you're welcome. So glad this was helpful.
That's so sad and I'm sorry. What truly makes her "qualified" is understanding that firstly, a degree in psychology is not enough to have the "skills" that most people think you do, and secondly, any behavior she is using isn't "psychological prowess" but rather manipulation which most humans can do. Sounds like an ego trip that doesn't make sense.
In essence, I'm saying that there may be nothing to worry about here because it seems rather ameturish that she would "use" her understanding to harm you or others. That's certainly pure manipulation, not skill.
I'm sorry.
@@TherapistTamaraHillthank you for your reply. I agree and with the help of therapy I belive that the control and manipulation stems from jealousy, which I think originates from when I was born over 50 years ago. She uses her psychology qualification to insinuate that she's better than everyone else in identifying manipulation tactics and that you are stupid to not listen to her because she has a degree. Now I understand a lot of it is projection!
It most likely is projection! I'm sorry you've had to deal with this. It's not pleasant at all.
I am your fan ... I have seen your videos..for many months .. I love your color and also your knowledge. You are a great professional. ❤❤❤❤I I say all this respectfully. I am proud of you. ❤
❤🤗🙏Thank you! So humbling. Appreciate that.
I second that.
🤗 @Gotteskind17
Yes! I agree it is a slow gradual process of changing your mind to their advantage!
People will use your emotions to alter your mind.
That's a really good point!! Very much agree.
It's because of the limbic brain-(emotional part )
Oh wow I wish I could have caught the live! My step mom's vibe is always putting out bad vibes! Very controlling, very selfish and turning my family against me!
I'm sorry! I know that has to be hard within the dynamic of step-child/step-parent.
You are helping out in this regard ... I love you ❤❤❤❤❤❤. You are so beautifull ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤ I
Thank you so much!!❤🤗That's an answered prayer of mine. So glad I can help.
Hi dear I am from Brazil. I love your videos
Hello 😊and welcome! Glad to have you here.
We love listening to Tamara Hill in any condition. If she had just stepped out of the shower and was wrapped in a towel with dripping hair, we'd still be happy that she's talking.
🤣🤭🥰thank you!! Silo glad this was helpful despite the audio.
Thank you letting us know the differences between perception and prospective reality!
You're welcome 😊
Same concept of “children are seen, not heard”. My family feels I give my children too much leeway because I allow them to express themselves but I will correct if disrespectful. I’m not going to tell them what they’re feeling isn’t valid, I explain the way it’s being expressed. I inform you can verbalize a dislike with a sharp tone without raising your voice, getting violent physically but through communication with the range of our voices. My family can’t stand this. My children are either going to appreciate what I am doing or they will go against me like my oldest daughter have done. That’s ok whenever if ever she comes back, my door will be open. Since she was a little girl she never wanted to be punished for her behavior and she wanted to be the only child. She would falsely claim abuse, have others call ACS cases were always dismissed. She was diagnosed with Oppositional Disorder (it’s longer but I forgot) but it’s been going on for a long time. I have made decisions that weren’t the best that affected her and I’ve apologized, I took accountability and I attempted to work with moving forward but it takes all parties to want the same thing. I’m not perfect and being a young parent I put a lot on her, I acknowledged this and it hurts me that it affected her the way it has. I had to step away to protect my minor children now. It’s heartbreaking.
Preach, Sister.Preach .We love you. ♥️🇧🇷
❤🤗
Thank you Tamara. Hope you get a bit of down time over the weekend.
Thank you! I'm totally working on it. You too!
Same concept of “children are seen, not heard”. My family feels I give my children too much leeway because I allow them to express themselves but I will correct if disrespectful. I’m not going to tell them what they’re feeling isn’t valid, I explain the way it’s being expressed. I inform you can verbalize a dislike with a sharp tone without raising your voice, getting violent physically but through communication with the range of our voices. My family can’t stand this. My children are either going to appreciate what I am doing or they will go against me like my oldest daughter have done. That’s ok whenever if ever she comes back, my door will be open.
Ok - i just want to say something on a happy note- the Olympic games- I’m not into sports but I watched some swimming finals this evening- amazing and people from all over the world- like here.
35:50 I am sorry to hear that, thought Deb&kid are getting along okay..
I am not talking about this case, but I have an idea that some parents are over-controlling (control too many minor things) and a bit self-inerrant-righteous - critical about the mistakes their kids make (point out and shame kids for small mistakes, if their child forgot something). But we all are getting older and at some point the parent will become fragile and will have a bad memory, slow reaction, and will be treated the same way by their kids (raised to be intolerant for one's mistakes and critical of others). this is sad, be more forgiving smthng smthng
18:27 Dam I used to do this - after the last devaluation and invented accusations I kept listening and liking the songs she posted while I knew that it wasn't going anywhere and she was showing that my attention is unwanted, at the same time trying to portray love to another user and, as it turned out, privately speaking with many others instead of blocking me. It was stupid to think that I deserve some explanation, but thanx to that experience I found out about cluster B. recollecting past events makes me sad
Much respect.
Gr0w⁴²⁰Gr0w
Paradoxsaurus SynergisticRexus
Tamara, you're so cute lol. Can you please explain what the "checking things" feature is? Im not familiar with that one 😂
🥰🤭 I have to replay the live and see what I was talking about !
Tamara ...I Love you deeply
🥰🤗
Is it common for these families to use religion to control? I’ve been processing my own family trauma and cptsd and came to this realization in my own recently and trying to deconstruct. I’m so confused and it’s really difficult bc it feels like they used this to control me
This is a really good question! Yes, indeed. You may hear things like "honor your mother and father," "God says you are not supposed to sin and divorce," and/or "offer them the other cheek."
These scriptures are important but within its proper context. Abuse of religion is a common "sin" in these families.
@@TherapistTamaraHillI think I somewhat suspected and knew this and have started using doing this on my own - but understanding in this context is SO helpful. THANK YOU. you are a gift.
Also my grandma cut one of her sons out of her will (he had a lot of issues and did do some bad stuff but still) I am thinking this was her final power play
Replay ❤🌹
Your Always very beautiful. I’ve been wanting to say that for awhile. Beaty and intellect are you power traits. 🎉
Thank you so much😊❤
My father has ‘histrionic’ traits. So does his mother, grandmother, & brothers. I dislike the term histrionic bc of sexism, but the traits don’t lie. In my family, it stems from chronic child abuse that each parent/child passes down to the next. Awful cycle. This society allowing the scapegoating & brainwashing of women is 1 of the biggest reasons my grandmother developed these traits, i think. So, the label histrionic is basically sexism upon sexism. My great grandmother had to raise her daughter alone bc her family shunned her for having a premarital affair with a married man. Her daughter grew up with no father. Great grandma abused her daughter relentlessly, mind controlling her too. Her daughter had 3 kids, whom the great grandma mind-controlled. She did it to me too. Great grandma was also a child whose family immigrated to america in the 1920s, presumably after italy became a fascist state. Her family was scapegoated & socially outcast for being from italy & not having much money. My point is: this society causes these disorders by torturing people, scapegoating them, attempting to control their minds, & then further scapegoats us by labeling us as histrionic or borderline or sociopathic. Then it’s difficult/near impossible to get proper treatment, since society is so trigger happy at scapegoating people who have serious mental disorders. Meanwhile, the capitalistic eliteist regime that runs this society gets to brainwash whoever they want & ruin peoples lives for profit. Nobody stopping them or critiquing them for their weaponization of technology & psychology for mass mind control & narcissistic abuse. This society does not protect children & it is not meant to be safe for children, it is meant to make money for the rich, bottom line. Anything that gets in the way of profit is a burden, which means that children are comodified & brainwashed for profit. Many parents are mind-controlled by their jobs & the ever-unstable economy into behaving this way too. Anyway, i think that histrionic behavior could stem from the chronic trauma of mind-control that is generationally inherited, & also that which is omnipresent in society with capitalists controlling everything, engineering culture, constant harassment of the mind & body, etc.
🤗Thank You
You're welcome 🤗
I grew up in the dark
😔🤗
@@TherapistTamaraHill no worries I have excellent emotional night vision now
Please send me some tegardings for I Always see your videos . Your very intelligent ... amazing . Good professional .. I suffer from bipolar disorder ❤
Thank you!!
My sister is with a narc and she has become narcy herself. And they have my prescious empath daughter! I want her back. I pray to God daily. My mom is doing this with my sister now. I think my mom is doing black magic on us. When I distance myself my sister is suddenly under my mums control. How do I get away from this when they have my girlie. Its like I will leave soon cause they will give my girlie ADHD. I just feel it. They are mentally sick all of them and they have bad diet too. And they think they are healthy😂😳 are they controlled by enteties? Or is it the vaccines that has made it worse? My mom is not connected to God either.
❤
😊
You're a fount of knowledge! I'm yelling my daughters to listen to you. Gratitude.
Hi my name is Julieta
❤❤❤❤❤❤ I wish I had a woman like by side : so clever ... I am really affraid of being in love with you . I admire so musch ❤❤❤❤❤
41:30 sil = sister-in-law
What is the difference between passive or passive aggressive abuse?
That's a good question.
I've never heard of passive abuse. I would assume it is abuse that doesn't appear, to the outside world, is not happening. Almost like what I talked about tonight which was "covert manipulators." Passive-aggressive is basically the same. Things are being done to you but the abuser will never admit it. You sense a deep-seeded anger or resentment on their part, but they will never admit it.