A "Dr." telling people that being self aware is a problem or not. Sounds like they didn't need the "doctor." They need someone who isn't wet behind the ears and seen pussy to talk with them.
That example around 1:45 reminds me... Like... Is It possible, the more developed the country, the more we spend time reflecting? I'm a veteran. Worked a prison in Iraq. The men in there would hit on the females... Relentlessly. Didn't matter their success rates... And some has success. Kinda gross but yeah. And it makes me wonder... Does the education/development of a country affect this stuff? Because my observations are not empirical evidence. And yes, we constantly focus on ourselves. We're taught we are special from an early age, and we still feel empty, and we get into the world and realise we aren't special at all... And all that time we didn't build any skills. We never "got gud". The world worships the "special". We need to forget that though. We can get the skills to make our own path... Our own joy. I mean, it's the difference in the endings of far cry 3... Good meta example.
ikr? He said about how hyperactive "default mode" is being treated by such and such drugs/medicine, BUT he didn't mention how hyperactive "default mode" can be indicator for something and that it might be our brain telling us "ok bro, there is something you should work on". And instead we listen to that "voice" he said how it should be shut down and how it is panaceum for the Main problem? Tsk tsk.
very much so... also not even reflective but just being aware of things we do naturally can be stressful... imagine if you thought about every step you took or where youre looking at every moment or stuff like that, a lot of people deal with issues like that and partially has been my struggle
There's a lot of "middle paths" we have to walk. This is just one of them. Too much self awareness leads to anxiety(and probably other problems). Too little self awareness leads to a lack of self-improvement(and probably other problems).
@@matix676 your inner voice isn't inherently a bad thing. It reminds you to do things you need to do. Makes me feel bad for treating someone in an undesirable way. However, when the inner voice starts interfering with your daily functions thats when it becomes an issue.
being overly self aware -> reflecting on yourself all the time -> reflecting on your reflection -> thinking you're selfish because you always think about yourself
This is the root of why I hate the term "love yourself" because to me that sounds like fuck the world I'm perfect haha. Like, can't I just be okay with myself and love life instead? Or is that just codependency. Am I trying to be a control freak narcissist or are these reasonable thoughts since people are always like "no you're right"? And you end up in the endless mental spiral of thinking about your thinking and next thing you know is "HEY BUDDY WHATS UP YOU WANNA HANG OUT? WHY? GOTTA STOP THE BAD THOUGHTS" And then you go "lol" and nobody knows if you were ever being sincere :^)
My self awareness just causes me to be quiet around people because I think I'm gonna say something stupid. But now I think I'm just going to start embracing my role as the loveable idiot friend.
This actually explains why I used to binge drink. I was so sick of my brain constantly being self aware that I would do anything to shut it down, even at great risk to my own health. I wasn’t addicted to the alcohol, I was addicted to the euphoria I felt when I could talk to people in social situations and not constantly think about how it sounded. Fear, gone. Anxiety, gone. I had to relearn how to function socially without that crutch and it’s STILL a challenge.
Man that hits the nail on the head with any form of drug use! I've had somewhat of the same thoughts on LSD, I loved how I was able to react to life! And it's hard to get to that point now later, though there have been brief moments of bliss when it happens naturally!
this comment reminds me of a rockstar(i forgot his name) who was considered one of the greatest iirc? but still had to drink before every single concert because of stage fright i'm also a similar case, where every time i have to give a presentation i need to hypnotize myself that i don't care how others think about myself, and this helped me stand infront of people and do what i'm supposed to do but never really reduced the anxiety i feel before every other presentations. so i can't help but think that there is no fundamental solution for social anxiety; once you have it, you can't get it off yourself for your lifetime. maybe you could do the social interaction you are fearing, but anxiety will stay nevertheless. or am i being too negative about this? i'd love to hear anything from anyone who actually removed it without any kinds of medicine usages, if you will.
@@___-qj2lx Totally removing it is unrealistic, but severely reducing it is certainly possible. A few bits of my story: I always had significant social anxiety beginning at young age. It became very visible at my high school which had a focus on music, so we had to give a graded performance of a piece of music on our instrument in front of the class every half year. I absolutely hated it, was nervous to the point of visibly shaking and usually messed up at some point because of too much self-reflection while playing, which obviously prevents any kind of flow-state in which your motor memory would just carry you through. The same anxiety of course also surfaced in other kinds of presentation situation or any situation really in which I would feel judged in some way (like meeting new people). In my 20s I completely messed up my life because of a lot of other issues also caving in on me and I got to a point when I was almost unable to go to the grocery store by myself. Giving a presentation was totally unthinkable at that point. Self-medication was the only thing that at least made life bearable, even though it obviously didn't help getting out of my situation. When I got close to 30, I finally decided to get help and was lucky to get into a good clinic with great therapists for a couple of months, which led to a significant improvement and the ambition to have another try at life. I eventually started studying again and had to give presentations, but since I was older and had a lot of experience in my area (computer science) I felt a lot of competence, which significantly reduced the level of anxiety I would have otherwise felt. This allowed me, step by step, to make positive experiences and gradually reduce the terror of speaking in front of people. Fast forward to today, I'm now 39 and wrapping up my PhD, which comes late at this age, but whatever. I've given multiple lectures and conference talks, which was scary as hell at first but even that got better over time and the last two lectures I gave in summer were even a little fun. If you would have told me that 10 years ago at my lowest point in life, I would have declared you mad. Even then, not all is good, my private life still sucks because I never exposed myself much to casual interaction, so approaching people or asking someone out is virtually impossible. But that's simply a consequence of not exposing myself to these situations. I could have learned it if I had been forced to, as I was in my professional life. I still self-medicate at times, but I have enough of a life going on that I don't let it consume me. tldr: Just getting older helps. Neuroticism naturally drops with age. Feeling competent helps with the worst of the terror, but more important is exposure. It just takes much much more exposure if you start off with with social anxiety, unfortunately, but it DOES get better. If you find yourself always avoiding exposure, find a job that forces you into some, even though you might hate the idea at first.
As someone who's still trying to resurface back to "society" from more than five years of semi-isolation. I'd love to get back to consistently positively interacting with people again. But it's so hard because I'm my own worst discourager. Also, I don't drink or take any drugs, over the counter or not, so I find myself abusing either sleep or eat schedule and digital stuff just to avoid/make a false sense of control whenever my brain is encountering thoughts I'd rather not solve at the moment. I even developed stimming! Like, at first, it's gestures, I'd clap to get the thought out, now it's whistle/shushing myself audibly. The latter makes the whole thing more visible to the people around it which makes me even more anxious of them figuring me out and then misinterpreting it or use it against me or something.
So we evolved to get self awareness, then kept evolving until we got depression, so we evolved to get disassociation to combat depression. That's a hell of a perk tree
@@gabrielantos4144 dissociation makes me think of how people go into short term shock physically when a pain theshold is exceeded, because it lasts only a few seconds/minutes before it really hurts. I'd like to think disassociating is more similar to that than mental shock which can last months/years as a result of heavier trauma
so THAT is what that is called. it literally feels like i live in my head with how much i'm constantly self-analyzing. my world doesn't exist that much outside of my brain and my body.
The irony of this hyper self-awareness is you can never truly see yourself as others see you so you can't really know if they think you're "ugly" or "stupid". However, because you think they do you react to that idea and can end up looking standoffish, which can repel them, which confirms your insecurities. I think I just got flushed down a rabbit hole of self-awareness.
everyone has a different idea of you so there's no point in trying to see how they perceive you. there are as many versions of you as many people know you or of you. you should stop giving fucks about it and focus on feeling good within yourself. become your own best friend. human life is so short, who gives a fuck.
True, but it's a liberating thought. You can't know, so why waste time thinking about it? It may not work every time, but it's a useful thought to help you start being kinder to yourself.
One interesting fact to me about this was that all these people ( _all of them_, your parents, kids, lover, best friends), not a single one of them thinks as strongly about you as you think, especially as negatively as you think. A powerful, although a bit scary, thing: People don't care that much about you, not because they hate you, do the opposite of caring. No, it's just that you're more absent in their minds than you think. All people have their own lives, all. And the distance between you and them only grows in perception as you mature. You are the only one truly capable of taking care of yourself.
these replies are nice and all but you actually can learn to be really perceptive and get an idea of how someone feels when theyre around you. you cant read peoples thoughts of course, but you can read their emotions which is very helpful. if you have this skill or can learn it, youll be able to take a minute to realize you have proof against your anxieties. edit: of course it's still better to just not worry what people think, but that is probably much easier said than done. if you can't just tell yourself to stop worrying, this is like an alternative.
Honestly, my self awareness is even more than this. It’s not just “am I a loser?” but it’s more “are these thoughts that I’m having genuine, or are they motivated by toxic unknown subconscious biases I haven’t even identified yet? How do I know any of my thoughts (like this one right now) isn’t also compromised in the same way? How do I know whether my memories also haven’t been distorted?”
Our thoughts are changed daily by many factors. You can’t really avoid it as it’s what makes us human, best to not worry about it and do your best regardless👍
in truth, most if not all our thoughts will be compromised by biases, since thats the nature of who we are as a species. We evolved to form those biases to help us survive, but now that we’re in the modern world those biases only serve as inconveniences mentally. What works for me is acknowledging that most of my thoughts will be flawed and biased, but as long as im open to reevaluating my views whenever new information is given to me, then thats the best one can do yknow?
No thoughts are genuine. They're just thoughts. You are the one that gives them power (or not). And as someone else stated, they are all biased by social conditioning. When I read what you wrote (thank you for sharing something so deep and personal), it took me back to the level of power I used to give my thoughts, and it was a nightmare. You use the mind, or it uses you. I recommend meditation (watching the thoughts and allowing them to be there without interacting with them)...there are many excellent 'gurus' out there, from Huberman to Eckhart to Mooji. Find the one that resonates with you, and its a game changer, it will be a life changer. I wish you all the best.
"If a deer looks around for food in ten places and doesn't find food, the deer doesn't start to feel like an idiot because it hasn't been able to find food." IDK why but this got me cracking up. I felt called out I guess LMAO
the worst part of being overly self aware is the infinite spiral of having realized your thoughts are irrational and feeling guilty for having them. Which just leads to a whole new layer of low self esteem that feels hard to escape from
im in this stage of having self-awareness and honestly it is extremely hard. once i start to think about thoughts that i recognized as reality i.e. "maybe i am the problem" and then realizing later on that what i was thinking wasn't even a tiniest bit to what is reality then i'd beat myself over it and feel extremely guilty and then, even knowing that, i'd still somehow end up in the loop of "i am the worst. i am not valuable. there's something wrong with me" kind of mindset
@@djweavergamesmaster No, some people are just like idk action-based, like they basically just live through their actions and dont really "think," but not as in they are dumb, no, like they just dont think unless they have to. Frankly I believe the people that are not as self-aware are really successful because they can do things uninterrupted by their thoughts for hours.
Ah! My therapist told me the same thing! I’d started dating a guy after being single for a long time. When I told my therapist I was expecting her to tell me to be cautious but she was just excited for me. When I told her I’d been expecting a reality check, she started laughing and said “you give yourself enough reality checks for the both of us. If anything you are too self aware and too in your head. Remember we talked about challenging that overthinking?”
Yeah something similar happened to me recently. I started dating a girl and she's just amazing. But my brain started giving me those questions quickly. Does she love me? Are we a good match? Will this last? What if I'm just telling to my self that I'm feeling something that I don't feel... There was this point where I realized that it takes me about 2 minutes of us making out to become rock hard. So I basically interpreted it as a message from my body: "We like her. Now shut the fuck up, stop overthinking and allow yourself to be happy for once." It's so messed up how far your brain can go to try convincing you that what you feeling is not right or real.
Damn. I've literally known this for the longest time but I never knew it until you put it into words… does that make sense? Edit: Found a quote!! "You might be emotionally aware of these, but you haven't had the opportunity to really name them yet." - Patrick Teahan
a classic moment of too much self awareness was when a couple of classmates were laughing and my anxiety was like “they’re laughing at you” and my depression was like “nah they don’t care enough about you to even laugh”
I've been suicidal for months now since my fiance left me, and after seeing this, I'm confident that I'm only blaming myself as a symptom of depression. Which makes it a lot easier to see why I shouldn't kill myself
You deserve life man!! Regardless of what life or other people put you through, being able to recognize your own mental state and how it effects your emotions is important. Remember to be kind to your emotions and feel them so they dont stay stagnant and build up. Nothing is too small to get therapy for(if thats something you want). Im happy to hear you dont want to take your own life and i hope that you have a good support system of people who want to see you thrive, even if you dont feel like you do, there is always someone rooting for you! Take care :)
Depression fucks with your brain, man, sometimes you gotta stop listening to it. Take it a day at a time and focus on what makes you happy (and isn't self-destructive) and you'll come out alright.
this is good to hear. i remember being 12 years old and praying as hard as i could to be able to have "my own thoughts" because it felt like every emotion i experienced was fabricated, steeped in layers and layers of self-reflection. now i can ask my therapist what i can do about it. thank you, this is a game changer.
Also just growing up w adhd in a neurotypical world, without getting the right help and tools to learn to cope/use your brain effectively tends to be pretty traumatic, leading to anxiety and depression.
@@Meeptome I’m autistic and absolutely agree with this. I honestly feel more self-aware than the average person I interact with and it’s felt like a curse.
Lmao this is me. I've had a crush for the past 2 months and it's honestly been ruining me with how much I overthink every possible scenario/rejection response/something wrong I might do or say. And when I ask other coworkers for advice they're like just ask her out man ur overthinking it. And I'm just like huh, maybe I am.
Hate for those not-self-aware people is kind of mixed with envy, because it must be so relaxing to just live in total oblivion to yourself . People that are just like the deer looking for food. No inner monologue, no self analysis, just simple existence.
I do envy people who aren't self aware cause they seem happy in their own little world but also they do a lot of damage to others unknowingly and that makes me mad. I'd rather suffer than make others suffer though there are days where I feel being ignorant isn't that bad.. is it? I'd like to be selfish too but isn't me being self aware and thinking about myself 24×7 = being selfish? It's a whole cycle.
@@cassiadsouza709 just consider that we have the ability to introspect for a very good reason: to develop true self awareness - which requires you to know your position relative to others. without a sense of empathy however, this could prove to be very dangerous (like some psycho idiots thinking they're gods in the flesh or some crap). my developmental process is hard to remember due to the sheer amount of developing that has occurred, and in a relatively short time. but maybe i can help a bit with a couple of suggestions and an idea, that may or may not be true (at least not exactly): consider the self development process to be akin to the seven stages of grief. you cant criticise yourself if you aren't self aware (thus aware of your flaws), and if you cant criticise yourself, then you cant intentionally improve. the problem really lies with what i mean by "improve", improvement is integral to morality, which has no objective truths, thus it is relative. long story short: self awareness = good. awareness of others (empathy) = good. a heavy dose of stoicism / sigmatism = good. all three together = kether / ipssisimus / christ conciousness / enlightenment / self actualization etc.
@@redlight3932 Yeah the comments section is a little in the clouds here. As someone who lives in their head, I prefer it. I have the best thought experiments as a result. My latest conclusion is that the Strong Force and the Weak Force are the same Force, after thinking for hours on end about the universe's spin and how it causes gravity; it must also cause quantum gravity as well, once you get past a certain point down the scale into the atomic size. I figure the smaller or less dense the particle, the stronger the attraction, and at the same time on the upper end, the larger and more dense, the more gravity it has.
Thank you! This entire video is a waste. The person from the original post isn't referring to being self-conscious, but instead is referring to being aware of one's own self awareness. I don't think the person has depression or mental health issues, but instead is having an internal philosophical life crisis on self and the existence of being present within.
@@pzkrispy9665 Totally thought the same things while watching. But also the reality is that these types of philosophical life crises are labeled as depression or anxiety or whatever by psychologists, and then treated as such. He's articulating experiences and potential causes (or pseudo-causes) for self consciousness that his viewers very clearly relate too, so I don't know about calling it a waste because he interpreted a tweet differently than you did hahaha. But I also have done kind of an insane amount of philosophical self reflection and investigation recently that seems to have simultaneously worsened and improved by self consciousness problems, in a way a doctor would look at and call 'unsuccessful, conditioned worsened' and just prescribe me a new drug or doses. So I feel a bit sad at the idea of so many people wanting to throw away the process because it can go wrong. To me there's a great sense of importance to the journey of self awareness and exploring your own consciousness that many people seem unaware of, or wary of, here. I'm just too fascinated by the fact that I can do that in the first place to ever want to give it up.
One of the most important things I have realized in recent years is that there is a fine line between being self-aware and berating yourself for the sake of self improvement and "being honest about yourself". I used to think that being self-aware just meant "assuming the worst about myself" because it seemed the most likely option.
Part of this I feel like is due to human psychology, when we min-max, reducing negatives feels better to us than increasing positives. However, for some fucked up reason, we and our culture tend to judge and punish failure, rather than learn from and forgive failure. In order to live a better life, we must be able to forgive ourselves. Self compassion is something that is hard to do, but is so sweet, and vital to our success.
Dead on the mark. Driving myself insane with a never-ending stream of constant self-reflection. Very unhealthy, and prevents me from simply getting things done.
So with that in mind I have a question: Do you then just stop "focusing on yourself"? So, as an example, this past year I've been in situations where I reflected on A LOT of crap that happened. Yes, it would be time consuming, sometimes even so time consuming that it would take me a week to move on from something that happened, big or small. But the results were always the same: a better understanding of who I was as a person, a better understanding of why this or that hurt me. Sometimes the pain I felt would still be there. Other times, very few times actually, the pain I felt would be balanced by this force of understanding, and thus that "pain" felt good and more manageable. Have y'all ever felt like focusing on the "little things" has benefitted you? Because so far it's benefitted me, but then other times I think to myself, "By 'benefit,' do I mean ending up in a happy place?" And then there lies another problem: is the goal to reflect on things in order to stop feeling pain or is the goal to accept the pain that you're feeling? Sometimes I don't know which is which. For me, when the latter happens it feels more manageable.
@@OrvilleScott for me by benefit i mean what is this showing me about myself i can put to use & advance me to better. My goal is usually to analyze & take accountability so i can learn from what it has shown me so i can be aware enough to not repeat the same pattern vs trying to make the pain “go away” but not really understand why it happened & keeping me on the same hamster wheel of creating the same pain I’m trying to only look at it to lessen it instead of going to the root. If that makes sense
@@OrvilleScott this might seem a bit strange to mention, but: the occult (literally just encrypted psychology), has a concept known as 'the abyss'. the abyss is a state of mind / condition you enter into after a series of events that trigger a specific response / development in regards to your psychological configuration. this response is determined by 1. your nature / nurture background 2. which 'hand' you entered the abyss from (hand = side. left / right). the purpose of the left hand path is to "smack you so hard, you wake up", however it always involves negativity towards yourself (almost exclusively due to others regarding you in a negative way). this can lead to intense feelings of resentment / anger, which can progress into a desire for revenge via means like: murder, torture and rape etc. (doesn't even have to be directed at the original source of the 'smack' (generational punishment eg.) the right hand path is also a hard smack intended to wake you up; only it is administered via proxy pain (empathy), this too can lead to undesirable results. basically: try to use the pain in a calculated manner for the purpose of self improvement, then when you feel you improved enough: use whatever gives you a sense of inner peace. personally i found faith in god to help massively, but also philosophy and leisure helped massively. rest is just good old fashioned XP and LVL up.
This is why I listen to music so often. I can’t be alone with my own thoughts often because I start over analyzing. So if I fill my head with pretty noise, I don’t have enough room to go full meta on myself. As many other commenters have said, it’s hard to move forward when you spend so much time breaking down everything you JUST did. And then breaking down EVERYTHING that came before it and how it should affect what comes next. And suddenly time has moved forward without you.
took the jumbled words right out of my brain. My favourite thing to do is start doing some action while thinking of a thousand reasons not to do it, like waking up to go to college on time. Purely because, I know later on I will think " imagine if I hadn't woken up on time I'd been so late". I think my time away, before I know it hourse go by.
I actually talked to my therapist about this and we came up with tools for me to not intellectualize emotions all the time. My level of self awareness became a barrier to experiences. I feel a lot better now.
@@autumn-null6852 I never thought about how difficult this would be to explain in writing but I'll definitely try. I hope this helps you! It's going to sound really simple but it takes a lot of work. 1. Realize why I was intellectualizing emotions instead of processing them-- I was constantly surrounded by people experiencing explosive emotions so I *had* to suppress mine. I used to think I had to validate what I was feeling intellectually then suppress it. 2. Feeling safe to experience emotions instead of barriering-- there are certain situations and people I didn't feel comfortable emoting around, figuring out where I felt comfortable was the next part After that I felt a monumental shift in how I experiences emotions bc I was out of the situation that required me to suppress. It took a lot of work, but every time I found myself starting to intellectualize, I would almost try to snap myself out of it. I stopped asking other people for advise on how to react to things, just trusting my own gut. If I found myself trying to explain what I was feeling, justifying it instead of just experiencing it, I'd just stop talking for a while. For me there's both a coping and a people pleasing element to why I feel I had to overly intellectualize my feelings, so I had to learn to address that. And there's a lot of people online who talk about how not to be a people pleaser, and that helped a little for me.
"Intellectualize emotions" is a great way to describe what sends me down a spiral sometimes. I really have to stop myself short and say "it'll be okay tomorrow" or "it's okay to feel like this right now" instead of trying to problem solve or dig deep on a simple negative emotion!
@@cattusahoy "It'll be okay tomorrow" sounds a whole lot like trivializing your emotions to me. Most critically, it doesn't address what's happening in the _now._
@@CoralCopperHead "Okay" may mean opposed to "wrong" like you're doing something wrong by feeling or thinking something, rather than "this is fine and doesn't need addressing". Accepting what you feel rather than trying to not feel it. Maybe.
I used to be horribly aware and recently I just kind of realized I'm just a person. I can make mistakes and that's okay, and I can just as easily grow from it. Allowing myself to be morally gray and not live up to the impossible expectations of being a "perfectly good person" or "mary sue" has helped me a lot. That doesn't mean I don't have my morals or values (I have many strong values I hold and try to live by in my life)- but if I do something a bit silly goofy, I can take a step back and know that at the end of the day I'm only human too. Allowing myself to make mistakes helps me grow in the best way, and embarrassment doesn't last forever.
I had a horrible self-awareness too and then thought the long process of thinking and mental suffering I kinda reached to the thought like "If I'm thinking with my mind clear how to solve situations and after the thought process make a mistake - I'm not bad I just mistaken"
I am highly self aware if there is some kind of risk attached to my decision. I suddenly feel unsure about everything. The worst moment is if I was supposed to know something but I don't. I get really stressed and can't get out of it, knowing that's all because of my incompetence. I do not wish to happen to anyone, it's paralyzing.
This is precisely the problem a lot of people on here have. Overthinking and reflecting too much causes crippling self doubt, perfectionism, idealism and paralysis. Being afraid to do anything in case you fail or get criticism makes you a slave to other people and prevents you from living YOUR life. A little bit of main character syndrome is actually good for you.
When I say I have a problem and people say "well at least you're self aware" I'm kinda like no, I think the fact that I'm self aware makes it worse. Like I know it's a problem but I keep doing it anyways. I feel like that's worse than not knowing it's a problem at all, because now I'm actively *not* fixing the problem Edit: yo I just want to say that I wrote this when I was feeling really down on myself, but I don't want this to make anyone else feel bad about something that they didn't previously feel bad about. Self awareness can be bad when it's causing you to beat yourself up about your problems, but really it's the beating yourself up about it that's more harmful. Don't be too hard on yourself if you have issues that you're struggling to address, because even just by this thread you can see that it's pretty common to feel that way, especially if you have a lot going on because it can get overwhelming. Please everyone just try to take care of yourself. Shit is hard but if it helps a little know that we're in it together
I disagree. I feel like knowing the problem is the first step to fixing it. For a really long time, I didn't know the issues that I had, so I fucked up all the time. Once I realized, there was this huge wave of shame and guilt that overcame me (which sucks at first, but now I'm glad I went through that) and step by step, I started to change my behaviour. It's baby steps, you know? You'll get there one day, I promise.
It’s horribly exhausting. That intuitive recognition is what’s interesting though. One could then develop and train oneself to reject the self-awareness with an understanding of our instinctive responses to comments like that. That level of mindfulness is the only thing that really helped me when I recognized that stuck feeling
@@lo4568 you miss the part where the shame and guilt is constantly overcoming you and you dont do anything about it, which makes you feel even more ashamed and guilty because you realise you are feeling this way and yet do nothing, hence the comment.
This gave me a lot of insight into my own mental health! I have the whole “overly self-aware” thing going on and it results in A) frustration and guilt because I have that knowledge but can’t use it to improve myself, and B) therapists mistakenly believing my issues are less severe than they really are because I talk about them in such a calm, clinical manner, thus unintentionally teaching me that my problems aren’t bad enough to require therapy. It’s good to hear a new, more helpful perspective on this!
Try and occupy your mind with thoughts that aren't so egocentric. We live in a vast world that has never been easier to access thanks to the internet, its good to think about yourself and improvement, but to obsess over anything can be detrimental.
I've taken up meditation and so far it's helping a bit, when you catch these thoughts try to notice them and move your mind to the present moment and your surroundings
You probably trained yourself doing it, you need to stop judging yourself. Also if its that bad just do 5 minuets of meditation everyday it accumulates, it softens the default network
I studied creative and professional writing at uni, and I remember them pointing out that a lot of poets who took their own lives wrote in first person and said “I” a lot more in their writings near the ends of their lives. When people are feeling depressed or sad or nervous, they use “I” statements more. It’s interesting how the frequency that you use “I” in your writings can potentially reflect changes in your mental state.
This was a problem for me. My most negative/depressed thoughts always began with "I" and especially "I wish". So whenever my brain started talking to me starting with "I", I trained myself to cut the voice off immediately. This helped me a lot.
@@atanamorell2 I think reflecting on your thinking patterns and deliberately trying to think more positively is a great strategy when you catch yourself thinking negatively. Things like “awe walks”, volunteering to help others (even a friend or family member), and just spending time with people can help get someone out of their heads a bit too and and help them engage more with the world around them instead of dwelling on things internally. Sometimes it’s also good to just verbalise what you’ve been thinking to someone else you trust who can let you know whether your thoughts are rational, and speaking with a mental health professional is a good way to learn strategies to rewire your thinking for the better. I’m not suggesting these things to you specifically. Just to anyone who reads this
i feel like my therapists dont even know how to help me bc i come in and explain everything and they're like "so you already know whats going on" and im like "yes but what do i do"
This is the reason why I don’t want to go to a therapist, it’s because I already know everything and I don’t think therapists will think I’m genuine if I know everything
Yea tbh I sometimes don’t understand why people even go to those therapists, they’re just professional talkers not helpers. It’s like you telling a mechanic your car issues, then he just repeats your car issues back to you.
Therapists can be VERY hit or miss. Some of them definitely just sit there and listen, but a GOOD therapist will give you tips and tricks on how to better yourself or on how to process issues you have. Depending on where you live finding a good one might be very difficult or far too expensive. I've been to two, the first one was very good, but retired. My current one isnt as good, but i still feel it is good to go just to have a discussion about mindsets, keeping track of progress etc.
makes me glad my first therapist was a good one. i genuinely cant imagine what wouldve happened if id said "im pretty sure somethings wrong with me and i think this is why" and she was just like "damn bro that sucks" instead of "okay, lets work this out" 💀
@@amazingnobodyleeI can tell you one of your problems for free, you think you know everything. Trust me, with every year you get older you realize new things about yourself and get deeper understandings on your issues. You don't and never will know everything, that's just part of being human
This also explains why self-centered and closed-minded people seem to be so much happier. Incapable of asking questions, incapable of being disturbed by the possible answers.
I'm a psych major, so whenever a therapist starts to go down a road or ask me certain questions, I already know what they're doing. That's why I like Dr. K; he uses different discussions and solutions than most therapists, and he always manages to surprise me with how he thinks.
I'm not even a psych major, but I've been doing the same thing for friends since I was an adolescent. I learned to separate giving my own advice from simply talking them through their problems (much like a therapist does) at a young age.
@@unsanitizedbabywipes6154 yeah, they always try this "goal-oriented" approach that feels way too linear and doesn't allow me to open up to them based on how I feel. I don't see a therapist necessarily because I have goals, I see them because I don't feel good, y'know?
@@simonboone623 yes why therapy didn’t do shut for me. i felt i was being as raw and down to earth with them and i felt as if they were not truly listening to my problems and giving me answers like google would or sonething
I've attempted to go to counseling before, and it's never helpful because the therapist always underestimates how much I've already thought about the problem.
This ‼️I literally just quit therapy a few weeks ago thinking it’ll take forever (years) to get to anything real. Lady, I’ve already thought about my issues 10 levels deep! I don’t need a walk down self awareness ave. I need a stronger, broader perspective so I can get out of this hole!
It really depends. I think sometimes the therapists have a good Insight and new perspective to offer from a first impression of the issue after all of you going to deeply into the issue yourself for years. And sometimes the issue is newer and you couldn't think about it that deeply yet is also true
I've recently finally been working on a similar problem. I could never get a health care professional, because they would all say "you're articulating your problem very well and the steps you want to take, you're doing fine". The first part is true. I massively overcompensated my lack of social development in my teens into becoming very empathatic, but in a way that I am very good at analyzing emotions but quite bad at actually feeling and handling them. I hope health care pros take a good lesson from my story and this video: don't mistake competence with health.
This has been exactly how I have felt for so long before I went to a psychiatrist for my depression. I would internalize that thought in myself (still do and am working on that) that because I am able to process what is going on in my mind, I can handle it myself. That is exactly opposite of the case. This ability to analyze emotions and empathize with people who experience it has made me into this massive people pleaser, where I have prioritized everything but myself. I am not okay right now, but your situation has helped me realize I am not alone. I wish you luck on your journey, and I will keep this in mind in hopes I can improve upon this and actually get the help I need. I may know what's wrong, but I certainly am unable to get myself out of it. I've been stuck in this cycle of knowing what all I can do to feel better and improve myself, but I don't take it in increments. I try to tackle all of it at once, which has brought be back to square one basically every time. Thanks for this. Competence does not equal health.
I went to a psychoanalyst and she said something similar, and I was really upset about it at first. But she then continued saying, still something must’ve brought me to her and she hypothesized about how this rationalization and competent appearance i made, could be a safety measure for the other, unresolved, hurtful parts of me to not come out. So it’d keep people at distance. That clicked hard for me and I felt really seen. Since then I have practiced living my emotions more and developed a little alarm nerve when I rationalize too hard
the majority of my days are great until a completely minor non-issue sends me into a spiral and i feel paralyzed. my therapy sessions are usually me asking wtf is wrong with me when in reality i’m making myself suffer by trying to answer that question, especially when my thinking and behaviors are in part trauma based. prioritizing just existing and easing that self judgement is my main focus in life right now. thank you for sharing your knowledge on this topic.
That happens to me too. I recently moved to a new home and I swear every little stressor that popped up would put me through a spin. When I sit down and think about my PERSONAL experience with this. I think its cause I dont have the self confidence that I will succede when a problem arises. So I need to give my self more pats on the back when I have a win and give myself the benifit of the doubt. When something stresses me out I say " you got this , you got this" over and over again till I stop thinking about how I am gonna fail and fill my head with "you got this" lol
I’ve come to this conclusion a long while ago and this video just confirmed my suspicions even more, “ignorance is bliss” is not just a saying, it’s the truth
The blue pill leads to happiness and fulfillment but also a schlong up your backside The red pill lets you see who's schlong it is and you're aware of it every second of every day without freedom from the torment
@Victor Kreig You can only react to what's ahead if you look at what's ahead. Of course if you're too busy worrying about the cliff instead of moving forward then you'll never get anywhere. There's a middle ground between freezing in place and blindly walking forward.
I'm so overly self reflective that I reflect on my self reflection which usually makes me feel a bit better, like "I'm such a loser" then I think, "wait I'm not a loser I just feel immense self hate because of my depression and constant self reflection over every single one of my issues" And even now I feel like I'm overthinking the fact that this comment feels very braggy but I know I'm just using it to solidify my thoughts into words.
Self reflection can be helpful and unhelpful, it sounds like you're using your powers for good! I'm glad you're using it to be kind to yourself. It's not bragging, recognizing strengths is a good thing
I guess I can share my experience too. I feel like I mastered my conscience in that way that I can control my emotional state in any way i want. Like I know what I have to do to make myself feel worse or energized without any medicine. It happened after a long-term depression (like a year or so) I was heartbroken 19 year old cos I got friendzoned by someone I fell in love with and I feel like I still love. Firstly I did a little research about what is the fundamental function of my senses and conscience. Found out it's all about getting and processing feedback from the environment, think about it, your getting information outside and inside environment to be prepared. But the whole thing of processing is giving the answer to it, to interpretate this info. I started thinking not how I feel myself in this situation but how it actually is. What happens objectively, not estimating it. It really helped me to understand that I'm overthinking situation quite sometimes. It helped me a ton and shortly after did a research how my nervous system reacts to different cases to change my emotional state and started to use it in my everyday life. Hope it helps someone
I remember really digging into a non-self aware person for the first time and being totally mind blown. Like youre not constantly thinking?? all the time?? its such a weird thing to think about. people really just be living in the moment. i do not have the ability to do that. at all.
I literally had this exact talk with my husband last night. He is sufficiently self aware but isn't burdened by it. I told him to take me through his day and tell me what is happening in his head from morning to night, I was shocked by how little he is over thinking and just living in the moment. He is full of energy and I am always too tired because my thoughts are too exhausting. Today is my first day of my challenge, I am going to live in the moment and think of nothing more than that. I am going to use my self awareness as a gift to catch myself when I am over reflecting or over analysing myself or any situation and bring myself to the present. I am hoping it will go well, I applied this technique for my struggle with body image issues so I hope this will work in general too! Otherwise people like us will always be depressed and burnt out :(
@@siritalis4956 believe it or not it actually seems to be working! I still have excessive thoughts but I have set aside a time during the day for myself to let my brain wander off but when I am at a task I think about nothing other than the task and if I catch myself drifting, I consciously bring my awareness to whatever task I am doing, even if it's boring and focus only on that. Background music helps to make a mundane routine task interesting, I know I will drift if it is too boring lol. And it worked! If it gets too much I journal what's in my head, so it's out on the paper and out of my head. My head went from head full of too many thoughts to a moderate amount. My energy levels are higher than ever, but my mind is all calm at the same time. Anxiety has improved tremendously because I am not constantly thinking of what I should be or could be doing etc. I guess it was indeed that simple, the world may be more complex now but we gotta keep it simple in our heads haha. Edit: husband also agrees with me, been more energetic lately and social events are easier too. I celebrated Christmas and was worried so much because it's exhausting for me normally, especially because family events happen in french haha meaning extra brain effort, more fatigue (husband is french I am not) . To my surprise I managed to enjoy the social event even with my limited french. All these stupid thoughts of "how do I appear to them, is my french alright, am I making a fool of myself, omg if I do this will they think" blah blah were all out of my head
This makes so much sense. I have depression, and sometimes it feels like im constantly analyzing my emotions. All it does is cycle into anxiety, which cycles into depression.
Bro I literally just had ANOTHER psychiatrist tell me “you’re very smart and reflective”, which is of course flattering but also frustrating because people tend to assume I’m fine just because I’m not acting out my neuroses and causing a scene, doesn’t mean I’m not deeply hurting. Thankfully at least this one sees through my being “smart” and “self aware” and is actually getting me the help I need.
@@saxpy sorta! I’m doing much better and am seeing a therapist that does really structured therapy methods (I have brain homework now lol). Mental health isn’t a binary, but now that I have better relationships and a better therapist, I’m certainly much more on the road to being mentally healthy than I was. Thanks for asking!
What they're really saying is "We want to boost our ego by pointing out something about you that makes us seem insightful, thereby bolstering our nonexistent authority to tell you what to put in your own body. , probably.
This also makes sense why I get so obsessed with fictional worlds, cause that's pretty much the only time I'm not analyzing myself, but the story or a character that interests me. New ideas and concepts make me feel very excited, and while I analize them I feel that rush of excitement because that's what my brain feeds on. And those new ideas inspire me and give me fresh new information to work with and have fun with its details. In addition, if I can relate to a character, it's even better. Tho, once I go through all of the details and there's nothing new presented in that certain story, I go over it and find a new interest. This explains why my interests are so all over the place and why I'm so indecisive about my career choice. This alone makes me feel so lost in this world. Like I'm not good enough for anything, yet have a lot of potential (at least that's what everybody tells me). It's such a pain, cause I want to be more productive and work harder, but I'm so mentally exhausted. I have no motivation at all. And I'm inconsistent even with my hobbies. And here comes the guilt. I'm not even doing anything and have no reason to be tired of everything all the time, but in reality my mind is a complete mess. Edit: This is also interesting to know since few weeks ago I started suspecting I had adhd (inattentive type) and as I've done so much research on it, it's like my third eye opened. Everything in my life, all my issues and behaviour makes sense and I heavily relate to people who have adhd. I won't go into details here but I'm so relieved that I found a community of people who understand. I feel like all of my struggles are finally validated. Edit 2: Thank you all so much for sharing your own stories, I never expected to get this many replies. It's amazing how we can all connect and feel less alone although we never met. And also, remember to be kind to yourself, I'm sure you're trying your best, so don't push yourself too hard. Your health is more important than living up to some impossible standards. Again, tysm! ❤
hello stranger with exactly the same life story!! I recently got diagnosed with inattentive AD/HD 3 months ago and glad to see in tour update that now you know you are dealing with inattentive AD/HD!! Thanks for this comment it makes me feel less alone 😭😭
Worst thing about self-awareness or being 'self conscious' is that makes you doubtful about what to say or do, because you start thinking about variables, often times weighing more negative outcomes and it goes from assessing danger or potential outcomes to literally hindering yourself. So annoying, stupid me!
Same here. Im like did I word it right? Is my tone too aggressive? Did they fully understand me? I wish I could stop doing this but I am like this because I dont want to hurt anyone.
@@rainystormy6128 Someone is always going to get hurt, specially nowadays when everyone is so sensitive. I've gotten to a point where I'm sure of what I say for the most part, so I usually don't care if people get offended anymore. It's lifted a huge weight off me. This doesn't mean being unnecessarily disrespectful or anything though.
@@rainystormy6128 this happens to me too, still does but I think I've started to think less about other peoples thoughts about me, its just easier that way
I used to think this. But then I realised it can be a blessing, as well as a curse. (Novel incoming...) I had really, really bad social anxiety. I usually find myself... disassociating from situations where I'm talking to people- so, I'll walk away from an interaction and literally have no recollection of what was said or done by me or the other, then I get into a twist about whether I said something stupid or not, or missed important information. I found that being this way meant I had no control over my emotions. I was toxic. So, I started to ground myself. I started telling myself that I have to make myself present for these interactions. I have to slow down and really absorb what's happening and what's being said. I've found that by doing this I can control what I say and do more so I don't do something that makes me feel foolish. My self-awareness used to burden me with my own anxious thoughts. Now, it helps me learn from them. "I'm anxious about this, so I'll do it this way instead." This has actually, genuinely cured the social panic I've had almost my entire life. It doesn't sound like it, but I no longer overthink everything. (I can even recognise the very moment this happened to me. The moment I took control of my self-awareness.) I actually developed another crisis because of this... I started thinking I was totally apathetic. I felt like, and still kind of feel... numb. Like, smiling numb. Not sad inside. I'm not sad at all. I'm genuinely happy and ubeat. All. The. Time. My mood goes down so rarely, EVERYONE can see when it happens. But at the end of the day, I make it my goal to, at the very least, be pleasant despite the numbness. I don't let my feelings of numbness/emptiness dictate the way I respond to or treat people. I'm not nihilistic. My numbess comes to me in the form of... not giving a crud what anyone thinks of me. I also feel like I don't invest myself into other people emotionally. So, it feels like a negative. It feels like I've chosen the smiling mask- because this is the mask that avoids the need to invest emotionally. I avoid drama, conflict, gossip, lies and lying- but I also avoid love and connection with others. I'm friendly, but I don't want friends, but I won't let you know that. It's not fake. My friendliness is genuine. It just feels... like... there's nothing behind it. Here's an example... when my beloved Corgi of 15 years passed away, I didn't cry. I felt relieved for her. I feel like that was wrong. I was shocked and frustrated that I wasn't a snotty mess over her death. I convinced myself it was because I was expecting this for six months. From the moment of her first seizure, I knew I'd be losing her soon, and I knew the day it all ended for her that she'd no longer be suffering... but still... 15 years with that dog I called a soul-daughter and not a single tear? I genuinely loved her. I actually sobbed the day my other dog destroyed a little plant I received with her cremains. I loved her, but didn't feel anything except relief when she passed. In fact, I was riding a high. She was put to sleep in her own bed at home by a mobile vet, and when they took her away to be cremated, I had nothing but positive feelings. When it comes to people- I can detatch myself from them in the blink of an eye. I had a friend of 15 years. A best friend. The only real friend I've had. Well, this friend became toxic, so I ended the friendship, and I haven't missed this person for a second. I've never felt the need to grieve our friendship. I feel relieved. I feel lighter. I've been this way for 10 years now. I've never "crashed" emotionally. I feel like I'm floating through life like a pleasant smell... Self-awareness is a blessing a curse, but in my case, the blessing outweighs the curse. It feels good being friendly. I'm just thankful I'm not bitter, resentful, envious, anxious, or disassociative anymore. I have a healthier relationship with socialising and myself, even if some parts of myself still confuse and concern me (the numbness).
Thank you for sharing Now it's feels like i am not alone The numbness you talked about is exactly what i am experiencing "What i do is genuine, me being friendly is genuine but i am not emotionally invested into you, i love you , i want you yo be with me, but so numb get butterflies " I think i know what triggered my numbness and excessive self awareness First i will share about awareness I grew up in a very strict household I mean it never has to be that strict Every thing i did that had to according to my dad The way i speak I words i use The way i drink water The way i eat Even when i laughed and had fun with someone else my dad used to say i am useless i just laugh and waste time i do nothing important and he was always frustrated with me with everyone i guess . It had be in his way literally everything The i way i wash my hand He scolded me He used to beat me I was a kidddd So i guess to avoid all that i became aware Always wondering did i do something wrong? Am i going get beaten? I started to overthink everything I lived in constant fear So that's how i developed excessive self awareness i think i developed numb too Because i had to deal with all that shit everyday so i preferred to accept it and not to take it as big deal basically i said fu$$ it , it's a routine why should i be sad or anything but i didn't know i would lose feelings all my emotions To explain my numbness there is another story when i was a teenager i was topper in my class it was in 10th standard A girl used to talk to me And i got attached She was not a that great of a person , she used to flirt with everyone But in my class she made it look like she only wanted me I also had trust issues since childhood So i Didn't really believe her I wanted to play safe game But i got attached cos we talked everyday in class flirted When i talked to other girls she used to get jealous So time went on After 10th we had a misunderstanding and she blocked me As i said was little numb already i wasn't that sad or anything but later on i realized a pattern when something bad used to happen i didn't felt sad instantly but it took some days then i felt sad Then one day she texted me suddenly my body was shaking my heart was beating fast i guess i realized anxiety attack then After that whenever she talked on texted me i felt that way Days passed i slowly trained my self to not to care about her not to think about her I watched videos explaining how to stay away from love how to move on how to forget And i did move on but in all this i isolated my self i lost friends i gained stress overthinking, numbness anxiety, disconnection from reality etc i don't know what else i have.. Turns out my emotions are gone I don't feel anything now. I want to feel again I want to know what it feels to be sad ,happy, scared, from heart What it feels like to live without my brain constantly reflecting my actions My story is still left. It's a relief to share all this.
Same but im kinda the opposite i let out my emotions more often when i ground myself and let myself be present and tbh it goes randomly sometimes i cant keep track of my emotions and what i actually feel
Are you an INFJ?? The doorslam, the over analysis of oneself, social awareness & awkwardness And I can see facets of my life superimposing with yours (I too had a cat, my heartbeat) I really hope that may you find real peace in this non-peaceful world
I used to be like that , and i couldn't understand why. I wasn't able to talk normally to people anymore, to look at myself like a decent human being, i couldn't feel who i was or what makes me, me. I thought i was cursed or doomed to live in that miserable condition for the rest of my life, and as soon as i thought that i started thinking about suicide. Long story short: I struggled for 2 years and then when i started making music again , finding other interests/ hobbies/passions , forcing myself to go out , to speak to people (even if i was sweating as soon as i thought of doing it) and eventually i stopped thinking about myself all the time and only about what i am doing or what i'm going to do. Had to face a couple of demons on my own (Past memories) figuring out why i felt so bad all the time, i think that's the hardest part. For those of you in this situation, keep fighting and remember that if you can't feel the struggle , you won't feel the victory. Just wanted to share.
This makes me want to fucking cry. The first half is exactly me except im still stuck here.. I hope i can turn this bs off and live a normal life. Seeing your story does give me hope that its possible.
@@catalinasimon9215 I feel you, I hope it'll get better soon or that you at least meet someone you can go through it with 🌜✨ at this point I'm just happy I found this to know I'm not the only one going through this. Whenever I try to explain to others I guess it doesn't come out the way I thought? And they just brush it off as me complaining or they don't even listen enough to try to understand it.. sorry for the essay 🙏
Being self conscious and self aware are two totally different things. Taking the example into consideration. Being self conscious is feeling anxious thinking no one at the party wants to talk to you. While being self aware is acknowledging the fact that you're anxious because of your own thoughts, not necessarily because others don't like you.
Thank you. One of the most ironic things about human psychology/mental health is how much we think we know about ourselves vs how wrong our preconceived notions really are.
My self awareness is so deep, that it’s “I’m aware that I’m having these thoughts and I know exactly the point in time where my depression started and I’m also aware of the subconscious part of my brain where all of these thoughts come from.” I’ve been told many times by counselors that I’m highly self aware and that I should be counselor. But how can I help others if I can’t even help myself.
My self awareness gives me anxiety, which exhausts me, which makes me procrastinate making it hard to get up. As all this is happening I’m completely aware of all of it, yet still hating myself for every second of it all.
I also have that... In my experience, the best approach is to change the tone of your inner voice/your awareness. Imagine you're infront of the child-you when you start to procrastinate. How would you treat the kid? instead of hating yourself for procrastinating, try to guide yourself out of the spiral.. i try to talk to myself positively when i start to get anxiety - try to become aware of the actual thoughts that make you anxious / make you procrastinate and try to change those. If you understand why you're procrastinating, instead of just hating yourself for it, you will find a better way to deal with it, a more relaxed way
Adding to the comment above- I used to have a "glass half empty" perspective/inner voice in my early teens (I also had anxiety and depression). With some training I could pick out more of the positive in people/situations/myself instead of just hyper-focusing on the negative. It's a lot of work, but think of it as daily stretches for your mind...over the years it's helped me a lot. It sounds corny but write/say 3 things you did well or like about yourself everyday. Also talking to others about these feelings helps a ton, not even just to a professional, but to family and friends who are understanding (mine weren't super understanding, but it was really good to just get it off my chest). I do suggest seeking professional help if you're able. Accepting your flaws is a huge hurdle to overcome, but it's possible and takes time, so don't be too hard on yourself. Sorry for the long comment, you remind me a lot of myself so I'm hoping some of this helps. I wish you all the best ❤️
Find some positive truths about yourself that you know to be true and use them against your thoughts. Knowledge facilitates action and the only thing that can stand between what you know and what you do is your thoughts.
@@brittahasnofilterThat quote is by Aristotle. Here are a few more: All of humanity's problems stem from man's inability to sit quietly in a room - Blaise Pascal I know nothing except the fact of my ignorance. True knowledge exists in knowing that you know nothing - Socrates True wisdom comes to each of us when we realize how little we understand about life, ourselves, and the world around us - Socrates The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes. . . but in having new eyes - Marcel Proust The ultimate ignorance is the rejection of something you know nothing about yet refuse to investigate - Dr. Wayne Dyer If you would be a real seeker after truth, it is necessary that at least one in your life you doubt, as far as possible, all things - Rene Descartes
I'm autistic and this is me to a bloody tee. I am constantly reflecting and manually running scripts in my head to smoothly exist in social situations. After 20 years of this, it's eating away at my mind somewhat.
I'm autistic aswell and I know what you're talking about. In periods of my life where I was very shy or had super bad social phobia I became "the observer", I struggled to make friends because of the shyness so I mostly just observed what other people did being stuck with my own thoughts to overthink EVERYTHING. And also me constantly researching my own flaws on the internet for self improvement also contributes to the overthinking. Self improvement isn't bad on the surface but maybe I have become somewhat obsessed with it feeling like I need to be this perfect human to be accepted. I know that I have made some big self improvements over time but I still feel like I'm not good enough. Like every time I don't get chosen for a job I get the feeling that the person that got chosen must be this perfect human that I can never compare to. I basically put other people on this pedestal of being pure perfection while viewing myself as absolute filth trash. I'm worried that no matter how much I self improve that I will never be good enough. I know that it's totally irrational and that no human can be perfect so why am I even thinking like that??
i started to try meditation(without the whole esoterik stuff) for it. meditation focuses exactly on this point. yes its about high self awareness, but in a konstructiv way. just try to focus on your breathing for 5 minutes, 4 seconds in and4 out without holding!!! Feel every bit like never before. This works like a mantra(mantras are used to focus your thoughts in line) you also can counting in your mind to 4 so that you become quickly aware that your thoughts drifting away. for the beginning it should help!!!
I feel this. I understand this too well dude. But for me at least it helps to know that it's not my rational brain, it's like standing at a cliff and it just pops into your head "but what if you jumped" I never asked that question, and I don't care about the answer. Knowing helps, but it's hard to tune out sometimes. Some days I mentally scream or loop some word or phrase to try to drown out the other thoughts and every once in a while this reflection just cuts right through, that's when it's at it's worst. When it's like that I can't even calm my head down enough to sleep until lack of sleep has dulled my mind enough to let me tune it out. It sucks but it can get better, medication has made those sleepless nights far less common, though a change atm is bringing it back a bit. But I think I understand what you mean. To me it's this nagging feeling that my personality is not my own but something I've fabricated like some suit. That I am always lying to others about who I am, that if they actually knew me we that they would be repulsed for some reason.
The worst part of self awareness is that you can be aware of your unhealthy coping mechanisms and watch helplessly as you resort to them again. You're doing what you always do and the self-aware part of you is yelling "No! Not again! Why? Why do you do this?" It's like an extra bonus level of suffering.
Small story from the last time I was at a mental health hospital: They told me I have to use the time to think about myself. It probably wasn’t this exact wording, but that was the message I understood. Instead of watching movies or playing games in my spare time while staying there, I could for example go out for a walk and just deal with my problems. The thing is, the whole year before (2021), I was mostly home alone and thought a lot about my problems. It was way too much and my problems got only worse because of it. They basically insisted at the hospital that I should do what I had done before even though I explained to them that this is the problem.
Omg so sorry for you 😔 sometimes thinking about our thoughts is the last thing we need, some ppl think self-reflection is always good bc it's not a socially-encouraged thing and yeah maybe your average person could use self-reflection. ❤
This was my experience at a mental hospital as well. It was literally the last thing I needed but they forced me to stay. I can honestly say it was the worst experience of my life.
this is why i will never go to a psych ward , no one working there understands mental health which is really really bad lol but thats what happens when you industrialize healthcare
I had problems with mental hospitals as well. Something they kept trying to push is just, getting rid of fears. "I never leave the house because I'm scared someone will find and kill me" "have you considered not thinking about it?" Mental Hospitals are meant to keep you alive in the moment, they don't actually care about helping you
What I’ve found in my therapy sessions that has really resonated with me is that my self awareness and perceptiveness was a defense mechanism that “justified” or “rationalized” my experiences and behavior. It was a way for me to process things and gain insight on them but now I’m finding there is so much more to these experiences and feelings and you don’t have to just “work through them” you have to BE with them you have to feel these things as they come. I learned that my self awareness and perception was a way to compartmentalize things that are looking to be connected and make me whole again.
I've always thought that having a constantly running thoughts, about anything and everything, and especially pondering on the self and possibilities and turning things in my head over and over that occupied me my entire waking hours were normal, that it's something everybody else does. That is, until my best friend pointed out to me, how "noisy" my headspace must be. To her, if she's not required to actively think about anything, she would just go about her day with literally nothing on her mind and unbothered by anything. It's like her thoughts are always on standby mode in the background while she runs through the motions, and only turns on when needed. No overthinking, no pondering. Clean and organized. I was just as amazed at that revelation as she was at mine.
Wait that's how people do it? I just tried envisioning doing what I do daily without thinking constantly and I could never. My mind has never been empty
@@julial4569 I always had a very "active" internal monologue, my anxiety began at age 12 and now I'm 24. Lots of times in social situations I wasn't really present but more in my head ( 60% of me was in my head and 40% in reality - idk how to explain the sensation very well but I would analyze everything, my surroundings, peoples voices, body language, myself. We all do this unconciounsly, but I was actively thinking about them. ) It was extremely tiring, at one point I was pre thinking almost everything that I was saying, causing stuttering and I almost went to a speech therapist cuz of it. I didn't knew how to stop, Covid actually helped because now everybody had to wear masks and my mind couldn't analyze facial expressions anymore, so it was like a break from it. But what helped the most was a 2 month period in summer when I had my last exams in university and that was all I could think about, I almost had a mental breakdown. But surprisingly it did wonders in reseting my brain. After 2 months of not always thinking about my surroundings or myself I broke out of that habit and now for the first time in my life I am able not to think about stuff all the time, it's very weird, it's just quiet and I can be actually present in the moment. What I learned through this is that habits is what makes us who we are and changing them can do wonders. From an overanalyzer with an constant internal monologue I jumped almost to the other side of the spectrum and can have 0 internal monologue.
@@JapKonoko i relate to your comment do much.. Especially about the speak Ing part that has been a problem for me for quite some time.. That pre thinking about what i am saying ať the moment, like ugh i hate it cause i cannot control my own mind.
I've had an attention problem with studying for years now, so much so i dropped out of university because of how stressed i was. The thread that linked all my studying failures together is the fact that I can't, like, control my thoughts enough and calm myself enough to focus on reading, i always get distracted by my daydreams and self-reflective thoughts. It's gotten so bad I've been constantly mentally exhausted regardless of how much i try to relax, exercise, sleep and eat well
@@kaivirin Meditation before the task helped me to clear my mind and get some stuff done. Good sleep as well. Minimizing stress would help a lot but it's hard to do. I try to regulate stress but it's working progress. Journaling should help too. And I can't really make myself meditate lately. My mind is somewhere else but practice makes perfect I guess.
this sounds like extremely high level ADHD, I've had this problem as well and I'm considering getting on Adderall just to see if that will help me. I know if I take small bits of caffine throuhgout the day that that helps me
I actually became (quite ironically) self aware about this phenomenon a few months ago and active stop my self from self introspecting too much whenever I catch myself doing it. It's like I go off in a tangent in mind where 'Me' is trying to overanalise my own thoughts and justify its validity and ' I ' have to interrupt 'myself' , i literally tell my self to shut the fuck up in my head some times😂
Sounds like good practice to actually say it out loud :) Externalizing that voice which we use actively to work against our overly internalizing voices that just block moving on.
Being self aware for me is so hard cuz I know my patterns. I know my illogical thoughts. I know everything about all my faults. So when they still happen, it really tears me down.
You really expect to be able to avoid mistakes just because you know about them? I mean, at least you're part-way there. Most people don't even notice they've made a mistake and continue to be a burden.
@@TheStrandedAlliance touché. But when I’m in that head space, I can’t stop myself from certain things sometimes. At least that’s how it used to be. Even thinking bout the consequences, I’d still go through with a bad decision. Like quitting a job for example.
@@HistorySkatesomething I've been trying to do is counteract that with reflecting on things i am doing good and that could be as simple as getting out of bed or putting away the dishes. Works pretty well for me, so maybe it'll help for you too.
I realize that it was and still is my narcistic and emotionally abusive mom that implanted this overly active self awareness within me. She constantly makes me feel watched, this made me very self aware, this self awareness was developed as a defense mechanism, to scan the possible threats of my mother.
Damn, same with me but i got it from my dad, i got so efficient in dodging abuse from my dad that i completely lost my own desires and thoughts because of this. Im 32 and life is getting better but i really cant figure out where to go in my life because i dont feel that part of myself anymore. I have something in mind about what to work towards/ or plan for in the future but then the doubts start coming and i start to deconstruct everything in a way that everything is irrelevant and pointless to pursue. For me my defense mechanism was this huge emptiness i felt, if i cant feel anything/ nothing feels important, nothing can hurt me.
Similar story here. I wasn't allowed to read, which was my coping mechanism, because it meant I'd be unavailable to my insecure, anxious mother. She used to get quite upset about it I quickly changed my behavior. I'd start talking to her more about my problems, and she'd never have any advice or perspective, which made me feel anxious and powerless. This set up a disastrous pattern where I was coming to her with ALL my problems and never being guided to solve them myself. I wish I'd been able to see what was happening so much sooner, but talking and endless analyzing became a crutch I'm now dependant on as an adult. There's a lot of shame now, too, for being pathetic and impotent, unable to do anything or even control my own emotions.... as I used to do naturally as a teenager.
@@tonymahoeney dodging abuse is a pretty good way of explaining it. I often feel ridiculous about how much i care to not get shredded by my dad bc at the end of the day all he does in those instances is say i am lazy or stupid. But I fight every day to limit the chances of that happening. I am relieved i am not the only one
I’m actually gonna cry. I thought I was insane. I hate how self aware I am. I didn’t realize this was a thing- I’m almost shaking. Thank you RUclips for recommending this video! I’m gonna do my homework now... I’m still processing the fact that I’m not just self absorbed and a terrible person on the verge of insanity.
I feel you there. It's the point where we can truly feel the value behind "ignorance is bliss". Yet we also know that we'd be mad at ourselves for being ignorant & stupid, because we've already dive in too deep and know the better path that we should be taking instead. The responsible, respectable attitude, even if we can't perfectly fulfill the ideal. Gotta be patient with ourselves. After all, there are denser people out there who can get away with all sorts of personal flaws we'd curse ourselves if we do it. :P We're a social animal who fill the flaws of each other to progress after all. Everyone has their flaws & dark sides, some just take it more casually while people like us take it (over-)seriously.
this explains my desire to get drunk. I've only gotten drunk 2x in my life bc I'm afraid of an addiction bc I KNOW when I'm drunk, I just become confident and less conscious of myself and am free from my constant self analysis. I feel that probably has a strong correlation on why people who are depressed have a tendancy to become alcoholics.
same same same! i'm 17 so i'm obviously not legal but i think i'm going to have to wait until i'm at least 26 or something to drink because i'm really prone to getting addicted to things (books, certain emotional experiences, sugar, etc.) and i feel like if i get drunk i'll want to be that way forever. either that or i'll get so paranoid and lose so much control that i'll want to die
Yeah I don’t feel the need to drink but a strong desire because it helps slow down my mind and help me mellow out. I know that’s not a healthy way of dealing with things so I make it a point to not drink too much or too frequently but it’s tough sometimes trying to control that desire
I absolutely know that this is a huge issue for me. I am hyper aware and am always feeling judged or like I am standing out as an object of ridicule. If I was standing beside someone shorter than me, I felt like people saw me as a giant. I spent most of my life addicted to drugs and alcohol, just trying to make the thoughts quieter. Now I'm in my 40's, I've been clean for 12 years, but the thought of meeting new people is paralyzing. I just can't put myself out there without the crutch.
Explains why I’m so happy and euphoric when I listen to really loud music or have a ton of exciting things going on around me. I can finally stop thinking of everything as a relation to myself and start noticing and living in the outside world.
I’ve been told I have the same thing. It can be helpful at times, however in large it can also be extremely degrading to myself too. What he said about tiny things becoming my fault is extremely true too. It gets to the point where the self reflection becomes irrational but I feel like I can’t control it at times.
Wow I must be lucky then because although I overthink things, and I think all the time about all kinds of things, I do have the capacity to make logical and rational conclusions from things due to this overthinking. As a result, I'm not so susceptible to depression I feel. But, at times things do get me down. It's probably not helpful that I try my best to be knowledgeable in everything, statistics, probabilities, psychology, ect. I look 60 years into the future, and plan 30 years ahead. I am wholly aware of the terrible things that I'm inevitably going to experience, and the terrible things that I'm very likely to experience. It's difficult, and I'd love to be able to just live in the moment, but my personality does not allow this. I MUST plan and be ready for everything. I feel that this way I will have an a lot more easygoing future. But, there's no way to know in this unfair world whether your hard work will pay off or not. So, only time will tell. Luckily I have average looks or that would be another whole area about confidence that I'd spend thinking about.
@PNW Exactly. It consistently feels like there are two people in my head. One that thinks I'm a piece of shit that everyone is secretly laughing at and a second one that thinks I'm pretty cool. They fight every day and one of them wins.
@@hangukhiphop yes, but it's something you have to be actively conscious of as you do it (which sounds counter-intuitive, but it does help). it's almost like meditating as you try to interact with people, actively pushing thoughts out of the way as you speak. i even still have trouble doing it sometimes, and when I do it I have to almost "prepare" my mind for it before I interact with others. it will take practice but when it works it works very well and over time you can get better at it
Yeah I’ve been trying to literally just think less and it’s seems counterintuitive for some reason, like I’m just bottling it up, but oddly it seems to be working. Of course I still confront issues I’m facing when I need to, and when I feel safe enough to, but I try not to think about them too hard otherwise it just makes me more anxious than I would’ve been.
i’ve been intensely aware of this being my problem for a whilw but i had no idea it stemmed from depression, like i thought i might have been something intensely wrong with me, and the depression was a side effect. ever since i was 10 i became so obsessed with myself i was losing friends and this worsened my mental state even further because i thought i was losing friends because im secretly a narcissist. but i act in a signficantly different way than an actual narcissist, who reflexively denies that they are incapable of anything. i absorb each incapability i discover about myself as part of my repertoire of why im a fully pathetic human being and honestly theres an infinite number of ways you can feel bad about yourself, that will go above and beyond even once you accept that you are bad at everything. im not speaking as a teletubby btw
I hate being this self aware because I’m constantly demonizing myself for any mistake I make, which makes me hate myself more because I’m not even as hard on anyone else than I am. It does make me mature, but I still hate it.
this comment section is so insightful and comforting to read through. i pray we can all learn to let go of the things out of our control so that we may live a life filled with more joy.
Seriously though, i have read books and alot of stuff about these thing to just try to drag myself out of it, but atleast its feel comforting here knowing there are other people fighting the same bullshit battle as i am.
Thank you for this, wow. I've always struggled with extreme anxiety and largely because of my extreme self-awareness. I'm aware of literally every move I make, every mannerism, every nervous tic, everything I say, how I say it. I overanalyze everything I do, every aspect of the way I look. When I'm in the presence of other people, I literally imagine myself from an outside perspective and perceive all of my insecurities. At night, I find myself going over the events of the day and recounting all the awkward or embarrassing moments, or moments when I felt like an idiot. And if nothing in particular happened that day, I tend to travel further back and analyze past choices I've made and things like that. I honestly figured it was something everyone did. Glad to know there is a legitimate reason for this.
Sounds like me, not as severe as that but pretty much. Just tracking every single move you do. I always have to remind myself when I start thinking that way- “no one gives a shit and you shouldnt give a shit what others think. What they think doesn’t change anything.”
@@donnybuoy it's a great movie! my favorite slasher is black christmas but when it comes to the look of the killer, the prowler and my bloody valentine are on top
So sorry to hear that it must be horrible ❤ I also started doing that in school to a lesser extent. I remember when the 1st covid lockdown happened I felt so relaxed cause I didn't have all these consuming thoughts anymore. Unfortunately they started again just directed towards other things lollll
I had this problem but what I found helpful is using my self awareness of my self awareness to keep it under control. Like instead of thinking “I’m stupid for not being able to change this behavior” it’d be “no you’re actually stupid for being too hanged up on not being able to change so stop overthinking it”. It’s weird I feel like I’m too aware of myself sometimes but it works.
i love when you realize you’re own flaws and then don’t do anything about them while feeling guilty about it and at the same time not being able to name any one positive trait about yourself
Man, this comment really hit home with me. I feel this exact way and idk what to do about it. I am basically helpless. The way you wrote it, are you going through or have gone through this?
Ive realised that a bit over half a decade ago, nothing really changed, honestly i only have myself to blame, been finding excuses to not do anything the whole time, possibly because in the end while i feel bad? Envious? Jealous? About others that lives a life currentky more fulfilled than mine, i dont hate who i am currently either, i am myself and thats it
@berkai3828 I had to do that too kind of, now I'm working on just taking care of some houseplants and writing some games to try and rebuild myself, I found out that I didn't know me at the start of covid but creative projects help me
Self awareness-> alienation->selfishness-->narcissism-> perfectionism->failure->I am a funny little man-> I am a goblin boy-> self reflection->self awareness-> alienation....
Careful with psychoactive substances. I was having a really hard time last year decided to self medicate. It helped to some degree at first. But I ended up giving myself a panic disorder and it took months to recover. 0/10 would not do again. These drugs can helpful, but we definitely need to create safe environments and procedures for them first. Other wise random people in their bedroom run the risk of making their mental health even worse. So keep that in mind before you just jump up and do any of those substances
I remember myself and others on the internet having this conversation about being able to take drugs legally and safely in a safe and controlled environment. Basically having a certain spot with doctors and such monitoring your health while you take these feel good drugs in the right doses. Would help get a lot of people off the streets and stop drug trafficking of certain drugs and dealers to an extent and maybe even help children whose parents suffer from drug addiction. I hear about so many drugs that would usually be looked down upon because of it’s dangerous side effects but in the right doses can truly help people out with mental problems. Unfortunately they’re very addicting to your mind and it’s very difficult to overcome such addictions but maybe it can be the first step to rehab. Getting control of your intake first and then go into rehab and give it a shot. Like crawling before you walk. Most people who go into rehab drop drugs almost immediately and is probably part of the reason why a lot relapse. If they took smaller doses in a controlled and safe environment then went into rehab, it would probably make it a little easier right?
@@frankjaeger1711 This is a conversation people have about legalizing drugs and stuff. There was a country that actually helped addicts by giving them low doses of drugs until they were able to taper off them, in a controlled environment of course. Very, very few relapsed. Crazy thing about withdraws, and this is from actual personal experience, is that even a TINY BIT will almost completely stop the withdrawal symptoms. Thats all you really need. But its hard doing this in your own home. And it still “feels bad” buying or getting drugs to even do this. Thats why it took me so long. For about a year, i was taking tiny doses of stuff to keep the withdrawals away. I was never actually “high”. The worst part tho is the absolute void in your brain during sobriety. I never actually got “better” I was literally forced to stop and I can’t afford rehab. So idk what even would help me cuz even tapering off can only do so much. But I probably would have done much better in a controlled environment, where I wasnt being judged, and I was given real help (I have no idea how to medically taper off drugs, it was guess work)
I was wildly dependant on DMT for about a year. Smoking literal grams of it a night, mixing it with benzos, alcohol, cough syrup, whatever. My lifes pretty fucked now, I suffer from fairly severe hallucinations, over self awareness (as if I were tripping, small sensations feel like I'm dying). Not to mention i had a severe dissociative disorder prior to Dimension Hopping. Shit sucks man.
Its rly bad when you cant even feel bad for yourself because you see how good you have it compared to others so your frustration builds up about not being good enough
How are you sad? It feels like there’s nothing to worry about too much. Nothing is so difficult that you’ll never figure it out in time so long as you care enough to be persistent, and if you fail, you aren’t losing anything. It doesn’t make sense to me, I guess that’s what makes me dense.
@@whiteknightgfry For me, a lot of the time it's the feeling that I'll never overcome certain things that I want to overcome; sure if I just tried to be good at painting and then realized that I wasn't cut out for it but I still had other options I'd be fine, but the real trouble I run into is having things I really like and want to do, but I feel like some inherent part of me isn't designed for it. Along with the fact that doing all those types of things takes time, and I get anxious that I'll have wasted my time trying to find what I'm good at when I'm not really good at anything. Or the feeling that I can't be good at things like social skills or empathizing with people or enjoying the moment, which I wouldn't really be able to accept if I'm inherently bad at those things and could never do them. I think it's less about being stupid or dense, and more of a frame of mind and what you grew up caring about; I never really had any social skills as a kid and I would try to get really good at things, but even if I succeeded it all felt hollow. Whereas if you had social skills, or your parents prioritized something else rather than intellectualism like mine did, then you might have a fundamentally different frame of mind that just doesn't make you think about those kinds of things.
It’s nice to see someone else say this and to relate to it. I’ve been working on acceptance and decreasing self awareness….and some days can be better than others. But ultimately it just feels like hyper awareness has been naturally ingrained into my soul and existence. I can’t escape it. It’s almost like I don’t even have a choice it’s just how my body and brain interacts with the world. Every thing I do and every social interaction there’s always this little bug in the back of my brain assessing and reflecting on the situation and how to properly interact with it, rather than accept it in the moment and be truly authentic. I even do it with my closest friends and family and even my wife. I feel and fear that I will be like this for life. I’ve come a long way but it’s just part of my existence at this point and it feels like a curse (sometimes a blessing) that I have to carry until I die. And It’s sad to say but I’ve resorted to substance abuse at times and that substance being a natural herb called kratom that has opiate like effects. I genuinely take it as a medicine to help numb or calm my mind. But I’m still relying on a substance just to feel mildly ok. I’ve been prescribed various medications such as benzos and anti anxieties, anti depressants, adderall, etc. and none of them helped. There is no miracle cure and my brain overpowers them all easily. The only thing that gives me relief is unfortunately opiates. And I know the slippery slope that pathway will be. But sometimes it can get to the point where the risk is worth the relief. But I refuse to go down that road bc it just leads to death and sadness. I’m getting to the point where I’m actually considering some kind of psychedelic therapies such as clinical ibogaine therapy or ayahuasca. But I’m terrified bc I’ve done hallucinogenics many times (typically recreationally) and honestly they just made me even more aware with even more to think about and the nature of existence and reality. So I worry this may be the case with psychedelic therapies. I guess my point is that it feels utterly incurable and so intensely strong that there’s nothing I can do but just learn to live with it. But It will be a long, hard life of suffering and I guess that’s just something I have to face and live with. If any of you out there are like me, just know that I feel deeply for you and I’m sorry you have to go through this. You’re not alone and fighting the unending battle of hyper awareness makes you a goddamn warrior. Many don’t understand how hard we have to fight each and every day. Just keep going and perhaps we will make amends with ourselves one day whether it be in this life or the next. Love y’all and have a beautifully aware day.
I always start crying whenever I (re-)realize I'm too self-aware of everything affecting my mental health in relation to myself and my actions/thoughts. Meanwhile, a bunch of us are self-aware of being this self-aware and I'm just stuck here in this destructive never-ending cycle and hating myself along with everyone else sharing this problem.
Boy, am I glad I came across your channel today. I am 67 & have been trying to figure myself out intensely over the past decade. You have already opened my eyes to a few things. Thank you!❤
It's like people commonly say get a hobby, do things you have interest in etc just so we would get busy with ourself and not to have time to think too excessively on any things
My big "green flag" when i saw a new therapist after having to switch over and over was when the therapist noted I was "very aware" in a concerned tone Other therapists have said things like "well you're very observant/intelligent" and didn't get a problem with that But, absolutely, you can get very overwhelmed, for anything, very easily
@@gorkyd7912 My experience is it's helpful in small bursts. I wish I could find a therapist that I could see once a month or so. Meeting more often (like every single therapists I've seen seems to 'require') just results in rehashing things I've been traumatized or stressed about in the distant or recent past.
Yeah my therapist doesn't seem to be concerned over my self awareness. It took my own self awareness to realize that my self awareness is destructive...But not sure where to go from there. 😅 Was hoping this video would have more of an answer. It's been so hard for me to try find new a therapist unfortunately.
@@Hawk_Leigh OK! I know this is not the best thing to take advice from strangers on the internet or wtvr but tese are some very general things to help yourself ~When my therapist saw I nodded to everything she said deppression could lead to(procrastination, bad responses to other people, demotivation, loss of enjoyment) she asked me "what things can you do about it?" I responded what I knew or had been told before "try new things, rest when I know I'm bored, try to not focus on intrusive thoughts[...]" she then asked me a few sessions later "It seems you're not _advancing_ , you seem to be stuck" and then i ranted about I know what's wrong with me and I know I should do this and that... She asked me *"Have you tried doing those things"* ~It hit me that I procrastinated on helping myself, but I was too depressed to do those things, like , it's my fate or wtvr >try asking people around you if they see those *bad habits* on you, you're probably masking >If you suffer from being *too* self aware you're probably not letting others help you >maybe you're stuck emotionally, to believe you deserve the help >try to archive what you do on a daily basis, like, a list of what you did or journal. whatever you prefer, this is to *know* what you did and not forget it ~These are all things I got my therapist or from my own observation. You have to know I not saying these things in a judgemental tone, I fail to do this things myself ( " = ,=) HOPE THIS HELPS ! \(^O^)/
I am extremely self aware and it makes it hard to feel through my emotions because I start feeling something and immediately start talking myself down and I never really allow myself to work through my emotions at all. It is really hard and exhausting to kind of fight with yourself
Yeah, I get angry or sad and I always tell myself "Why are you angry? Why are you sad? You shouldn't be, you have family, a job, a home, that some people dream of having. Fucking idiot, get out of self pity." And then I have another dialogue with myself about reasons I'm angry or sad about, trying to give love to myself but ultimately ends up victimizing myself and I get angry at the fact I'm trying to come up with excuses for my life when I know I can stop thinking about this and I can be productive. And then I get angry at the fact I can't stop thinking and be more productive and start talking more self-hate talk, bounce that off with self-pity so on and so forth and gosh it never ends...
I wanna give ya'll a hug, but the best I can do are reminders. Sometimes you can't help belittling yourself, and that's okay. You can belittle yourselves as much as you want, but you're never going to be a lesser person or being. Ya'll are valid just the way you are. Not perfect, but still perfect nonetheless. You can work through the negativity, but don't force yourself to smile internally when you really can't. We can't be happy or positive all the time but that doesn't make us a lesser being/person. I'm also here to remind you all that it's fine to constantly have excuses at hand. It's okay for you not to do anything about these questions and have no answers to them. It's okay to feel stuck on one place and not being able to move forward. It's like that sometimes, and it's okay to feel bad about yourself and these things. It's a human experience after all. You don't need to sort up every single messy tornado in your head right now. It's sometimes alright to just let them spin and go through what you need to go through or think about. You could clean it up when the time comes. Take your time to sort this out, no one's waiting for you but yourself. Personally, feeling through all of your emotions, and remembering what you were self aware about along with taking action is the hard bit of self awareness. Like I can do this or should do that but you don't, or you end up in a spiral that doesn't benifit you. Personally speaking, I'd recommend getting a pen and paper whenever you spiral down these sorts of questions, or even the negative things you say about yourself and ask why. You can reflect on them further and become more likely to do something about it/feel less bad the next time you think about it. It stresses me out less whenever I remember "oh yeah I had the same mental crisis about my family a week ago" and instead of asking the same questions and reanswering the same things, I can jolt down the new questions that could answer other questions/have new related answers. I also recommend shadow work prompts so you can have an controlled existential crisis for you to jolt thoughts down with. It's odd, but it works apparently. It becomes more educational than worrisome that way.
A fascinating treatment for this that I personally went through and that works extremely well is to self reflect on your own self reflection. It's very difficult, but the over-self-awareness can actually be weaponized against itself and dwindled down over time as it comes under control.
I like to think of depression and anxiety as thought diseases. The problem that arises is that you spend an obscene amount of time thinking about things that feels logical to you because they’re your thoughts…but the moment you say them out loud to someone else, you realize that it isn’t. Take this sample of thought: “I have to go to class but I’m tired. I don’t want to go. Screw this, I’m going back to sleep” “Look at you. You skipped class because you’re tired. You’re a failure, you miserable pile of trash.” “I just couldn’t do it today. I don’t feel well.” “You never feel well. You’re a piece of garbage. You’re a failure. A waste of space. The world would be better off without you.” “Stop it. This isn’t me thinking this, it’s just depression.” “No, this is how you really feel. You don’t deserve to be alive. Everyone you know is worse off for knowing you. You cause suffering to everyone around you. You owe it to everyone to give up so they can finally get over how much pain you’ve caused them.” “I know.” It’s not so much that this is a logical train of thought, it’s that you’re basically in an abusive relationship with yourself. In the same way you wouldn’t tell someone in an abusive relationship that their partner is right, no therapist would tell you that your depressed thoughts are right. You’ve just been beaten into submission and think that it’s right. Remember that: logic and feeling are very different.
"Logic and feeling are very different" is a sentence I basically said a billion times before. Feels to me like people using their "gut feeling" as their moral compass without even realizing how much of it is irrational or based on their own history. I wish more people would use their logic, but obviously with constraints.
I’m this way as well. Everyone is like “at least you are aware of what you need to work on” but that’s the issue, I don’t know how to get there. Being aware of a problem is good but figuring out how to fix/work on it is a different issue. It’s so exhausting too cause I’ll spend my whole time trying to figure out and rationalize everything that I don’t know how to get to where I want to be. Even then not everything can be fixed so all you can do is accept that it’s there. I’m writing this realizing I’m doing the exact same thing that I’m talking about 😭 sometimes we l just need a little bit of guidance instead of doing it all by ourselves.
Yeah I honestly think I would be better at fixing my problems if I wasn't as self aware about them. It's weird. Like, I feel as though I would just be more normal as a whole.
@@irecordwithaphone1856 Totally agree with this!! Especially with the issue of compounding/multiple problems. I feel like if I wasn’t so aware of every single problem I need to face at once, I would actually be able to focus/or improve on a couple things at a time rather than feeling the pressure of all the issues at once. The awareness actually pushes me to inaction sometimes because it feels like so much work to be done LMAO.
This, coupled with a higher expectation for myself due to constant reassurance of my intelligence makes it painful to reflect on my own failures. Constantly aware of how flawed I am and to what extent and being unable to find the solution or sustain a solution.
Same. This sometimes happens to me too. At this point I don't find it surprising that many people experience these types of issues anymore. Hope you find a way (don't you dare take it hard on yourself {ಠʖಠ}) for this problem. Heart goes out for you stranger
My ultra-self awareness is the biggest contributor to my depression. What you were saying about the Psilocybin is very interesting, but i have always felt my use of psychedelics in my younger years was a major contributor to me being so self-aware to begin with
one of the best comments on here.. my hyper self awareness and constant overthinking has mostly caused me grief but sometimes it gives me the edge in social situations because i can read the room extremely easily and reliably. you're right, in those moments i feel like the smartest mf on the planet
@@femboiuwu Thanks! It's something I had to work on and I'm thankfully in a much better place mentally, especielly since beginning taking meds for my dysthymia 😌
Hey ❤ lit I can't explain how alone I feel in this I'm so ashamed of myself, feeling so broken like its abnormal for a human being to be going through this. Everyday I keep trying to find solutions to get me out of the thought loops but every "solution" just gets meshed in with the thought loops - becoming another thing that I obsessively think about with no resolution. ❤
post on our reddit, redditors. we will be doing this kinda thing every monday B) www.reddit.com/r/Healthygamergg/
A "Dr." telling people that being self aware is a problem or not. Sounds like they didn't need the "doctor." They need someone who isn't wet behind the ears and seen pussy to talk with them.
Link the VOD?
i love this channel !!!
Can ketamine help with schizoid personality disorder?
That example around 1:45 reminds me...
Like... Is It possible, the more developed the country, the more we spend time reflecting?
I'm a veteran.
Worked a prison in Iraq.
The men in there would hit on the females... Relentlessly.
Didn't matter their success rates... And some has success.
Kinda gross but yeah.
And it makes me wonder... Does the education/development of a country affect this stuff?
Because my observations are not empirical evidence.
And yes, we constantly focus on ourselves.
We're taught we are special from an early age, and we still feel empty, and we get into the world and realise we aren't special at all... And all that time we didn't build any skills. We never "got gud".
The world worships the "special".
We need to forget that though.
We can get the skills to make our own path... Our own joy.
I mean, it's the difference in the endings of far cry 3... Good meta example.
This can be a blessing and a curse, there's a thin line between being highly reflective and constantly worrying
ikr? He said about how hyperactive "default mode" is being treated by such and such drugs/medicine, BUT he didn't mention how hyperactive "default mode" can be indicator for something and that it might be our brain telling us "ok bro, there is something you should work on". And instead we listen to that "voice" he said how it should be shut down and how it is panaceum for the Main problem? Tsk tsk.
very much so... also not even reflective but just being aware of things we do naturally can be stressful... imagine if you thought about every step you took or where youre looking at every moment or stuff like that, a lot of people deal with issues like that and partially has been my struggle
There's a lot of "middle paths" we have to walk. This is just one of them. Too much self awareness leads to anxiety(and probably other problems). Too little self awareness leads to a lack of self-improvement(and probably other problems).
@@matix676 He didn't say it should be shut down, in fact he advised against shutting it down.
@@matix676 your inner voice isn't inherently a bad thing. It reminds you to do things you need to do. Makes me feel bad for treating someone in an undesirable way. However, when the inner voice starts interfering with your daily functions thats when it becomes an issue.
being overly self aware -> reflecting on yourself all the time -> reflecting on your reflection -> thinking you're selfish because you always think about yourself
good GOD I am truly in this photo and i Despise it
oh fuck
Yup this
This is the root of why I hate the term "love yourself" because to me that sounds like fuck the world I'm perfect haha. Like, can't I just be okay with myself and love life instead?
Or is that just codependency. Am I trying to be a control freak narcissist or are these reasonable thoughts since people are always like "no you're right"?
And you end up in the endless mental spiral of thinking about your thinking and next thing you know is "HEY BUDDY WHATS UP YOU WANNA HANG OUT? WHY? GOTTA STOP THE BAD THOUGHTS"
And then you go "lol" and nobody knows if you were ever being sincere :^)
@@PrincessNine by that logic you can't love anyone because nobody is perfect lmao. It's okay to love imperfect people including yourself.
So self awareness has basically made me less authentic in front of other people because I was too busy reflecting instead of reacting.
I can relate :‘)
My self awareness just causes me to be quiet around people because I think I'm gonna say something stupid. But now I think I'm just going to start embracing my role as the loveable idiot friend.
this hit hard!
Exactly, I feel like no one knows who I really am as a person because of this.
@@D3ViiANT Kind of weird to assign a social role to yourself.
This actually explains why I used to binge drink. I was so sick of my brain constantly being self aware that I would do anything to shut it down, even at great risk to my own health. I wasn’t addicted to the alcohol, I was addicted to the euphoria I felt when I could talk to people in social situations and not constantly think about how it sounded. Fear, gone. Anxiety, gone. I had to relearn how to function socially without that crutch and it’s STILL a challenge.
Man that hits the nail on the head with any form of drug use! I've had somewhat of the same thoughts on LSD, I loved how I was able to react to life! And it's hard to get to that point now later, though there have been brief moments of bliss when it happens naturally!
this comment reminds me of a rockstar(i forgot his name) who was considered one of the greatest iirc? but still had to drink before every single concert because of stage fright
i'm also a similar case, where every time i have to give a presentation i need to hypnotize myself that i don't care how others think about myself, and this helped me stand infront of people and do what i'm supposed to do but never really reduced the anxiety i feel before every other presentations.
so i can't help but think that there is no fundamental solution for social anxiety; once you have it, you can't get it off yourself for your lifetime. maybe you could do the social interaction you are fearing, but anxiety will stay nevertheless.
or am i being too negative about this? i'd love to hear anything from anyone who actually removed it without any kinds of medicine usages, if you will.
Bruh. You calling me out thank you
@@___-qj2lx Totally removing it is unrealistic, but severely reducing it is certainly possible.
A few bits of my story: I always had significant social anxiety beginning at young age. It became very visible at my high school which had a focus on music, so we had to give a graded performance of a piece of music on our instrument in front of the class every half year. I absolutely hated it, was nervous to the point of visibly shaking and usually messed up at some point because of too much self-reflection while playing, which obviously prevents any kind of flow-state in which your motor memory would just carry you through. The same anxiety of course also surfaced in other kinds of presentation situation or any situation really in which I would feel judged in some way (like meeting new people).
In my 20s I completely messed up my life because of a lot of other issues also caving in on me and I got to a point when I was almost unable to go to the grocery store by myself. Giving a presentation was totally unthinkable at that point. Self-medication was the only thing that at least made life bearable, even though it obviously didn't help getting out of my situation.
When I got close to 30, I finally decided to get help and was lucky to get into a good clinic with great therapists for a couple of months, which led to a significant improvement and the ambition to have another try at life. I eventually started studying again and had to give presentations, but since I was older and had a lot of experience in my area (computer science) I felt a lot of competence, which significantly reduced the level of anxiety I would have otherwise felt. This allowed me, step by step, to make positive experiences and gradually reduce the terror of speaking in front of people. Fast forward to today, I'm now 39 and wrapping up my PhD, which comes late at this age, but whatever. I've given multiple lectures and conference talks, which was scary as hell at first but even that got better over time and the last two lectures I gave in summer were even a little fun. If you would have told me that 10 years ago at my lowest point in life, I would have declared you mad. Even then, not all is good, my private life still sucks because I never exposed myself much to casual interaction, so approaching people or asking someone out is virtually impossible. But that's simply a consequence of not exposing myself to these situations. I could have learned it if I had been forced to, as I was in my professional life. I still self-medicate at times, but I have enough of a life going on that I don't let it consume me.
tldr: Just getting older helps. Neuroticism naturally drops with age. Feeling competent helps with the worst of the terror, but more important is exposure. It just takes much much more exposure if you start off with with social anxiety, unfortunately, but it DOES get better. If you find yourself always avoiding exposure, find a job that forces you into some, even though you might hate the idea at first.
As someone who's still trying to resurface back to "society" from more than five years of semi-isolation. I'd love to get back to consistently positively interacting with people again. But it's so hard because I'm my own worst discourager.
Also, I don't drink or take any drugs, over the counter or not, so I find myself abusing either sleep or eat schedule and digital stuff just to avoid/make a false sense of control whenever my brain is encountering thoughts I'd rather not solve at the moment.
I even developed stimming! Like, at first, it's gestures, I'd clap to get the thought out, now it's whistle/shushing myself audibly. The latter makes the whole thing more visible to the people around it which makes me even more anxious of them figuring me out and then misinterpreting it or use it against me or something.
So we evolved to get self awareness, then kept evolving until we got depression, so we evolved to get disassociation to combat depression.
That's a hell of a perk tree
@@gabrielantos4144 dissociation makes me think of how people go into short term shock physically when a pain theshold is exceeded, because it lasts only a few seconds/minutes before it really hurts. I'd like to think disassociating is more similar to that than mental shock which can last months/years as a result of heavier trauma
*[Skyrim skill-up sound]*
@@Glace1221 I heard the drum
I feel like I just stumbled into my planet 🥰
nah, we are just in a unnatural enviroment for what our brains are evolved to do
so THAT is what that is called. it literally feels like i live in my head with how much i'm constantly self-analyzing. my world doesn't exist that much outside of my brain and my body.
Thats well said :/ pretty much how I feel it too.
Same ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
watch frank james channel
Same and it ruins my day
@@cosmiclevi5274 my life
The irony of this hyper self-awareness is you can never truly see yourself as others see you so you can't really know if they think you're "ugly" or "stupid". However, because you think they do you react to that idea and can end up looking standoffish, which can repel them, which confirms your insecurities. I think I just got flushed down a rabbit hole of self-awareness.
everyone has a different idea of you so there's no point in trying to see how they perceive you. there are as many versions of you as many people know you or of you. you should stop giving fucks about it and focus on feeling good within yourself. become your own best friend. human life is so short, who gives a fuck.
True, but it's a liberating thought. You can't know, so why waste time thinking about it?
It may not work every time, but it's a useful thought to help you start being kinder to yourself.
One interesting fact to me about this was that all these people ( _all of them_, your parents, kids, lover, best friends), not a single one of them thinks as strongly about you as you think, especially as negatively as you think. A powerful, although a bit scary, thing: People don't care that much about you, not because they hate you, do the opposite of caring. No, it's just that you're more absent in their minds than you think.
All people have their own lives, all. And the distance between you and them only grows in perception as you mature. You are the only one truly capable of taking care of yourself.
these replies are nice and all but you actually can learn to be really perceptive and get an idea of how someone feels when theyre around you. you cant read peoples thoughts of course, but you can read their emotions which is very helpful. if you have this skill or can learn it, youll be able to take a minute to realize you have proof against your anxieties.
edit: of course it's still better to just not worry what people think, but that is probably much easier said than done. if you can't just tell yourself to stop worrying, this is like an alternative.
So true
Honestly, my self awareness is even more than this. It’s not just “am I a loser?” but it’s more “are these thoughts that I’m having genuine, or are they motivated by toxic unknown subconscious biases I haven’t even identified yet? How do I know any of my thoughts (like this one right now) isn’t also compromised in the same way? How do I know whether my memories also haven’t been distorted?”
Our thoughts are changed daily by many factors. You can’t really avoid it as it’s what makes us human, best to not worry about it and do your best regardless👍
in truth, most if not all our thoughts will be compromised by biases, since thats the nature of who we are as a species. We evolved to form those biases to help us survive, but now that we’re in the modern world those biases only serve as inconveniences mentally.
What works for me is acknowledging that most of my thoughts will be flawed and biased, but as long as im open to reevaluating my views whenever new information is given to me, then thats the best one can do yknow?
@@boneless-yeet-1127 @Samookely thank you both, its really nice to see positivity on the internet. Thanks
The funny thing is, your memories definitely have been distorted.
No thoughts are genuine. They're just thoughts. You are the one that gives them power (or not). And as someone else stated, they are all biased by social conditioning. When I read what you wrote (thank you for sharing something so deep and personal), it took me back to the level of power I used to give my thoughts, and it was a nightmare. You use the mind, or it uses you. I recommend meditation (watching the thoughts and allowing them to be there without interacting with them)...there are many excellent 'gurus' out there, from Huberman to Eckhart to Mooji. Find the one that resonates with you, and its a game changer, it will be a life changer. I wish you all the best.
When you dedicate your life to knowing your entire life story well instead of actually living it
This reminds me of Charlie from Perks of Being a Wallflower. One of his troubles was that he didn't participate in his own life
@@sherlockfowl2400 it reminds me of me
@@groundfx5733 honestly same
I don’t remember typing this
@@sherlockfowl2400 love that movie so much. I know we all can relate 😄
"If a deer looks around for food in ten places and doesn't find food, the deer doesn't start to feel like an idiot because it hasn't been able to find food." IDK why but this got me cracking up. I felt called out I guess LMAO
You're a deer that can't find food maybe?
Sniped Me.
You’re a human who checked the fridge ten different times and you didn’t find any food
Same! XD Wondering what I'm doing wrong because I know I'm screwing up again
I would like to see the deer EEG data to back this conclusion up.
the worst part of being overly self aware is the infinite spiral of having realized your thoughts are irrational and feeling guilty for having them. Which just leads to a whole new layer of low self esteem that feels hard to escape from
im in this stage of having self-awareness and honestly it is extremely hard. once i start to think about thoughts that i recognized as reality i.e. "maybe i am the problem" and then realizing later on that what i was thinking wasn't even a tiniest bit to what is reality then i'd beat myself over it and feel extremely guilty and then, even knowing that, i'd still somehow end up in the loop of "i am the worst. i am not valuable. there's something wrong with me" kind of mindset
I feel like I’m starting to drift back into that again.
yes !
you're telling me that not everybody has this?
@@djweavergamesmaster No, some people are just like idk action-based, like they basically just live through their actions and dont really "think," but not as in they are dumb, no, like they just dont think unless they have to. Frankly I believe the people that are not as self-aware are really successful because they can do things uninterrupted by their thoughts for hours.
Ah! My therapist told me the same thing! I’d started dating a guy after being single for a long time. When I told my therapist I was expecting her to tell me to be cautious but she was just excited for me. When I told her I’d been expecting a reality check, she started laughing and said “you give yourself enough reality checks for the both of us. If anything you are too self aware and too in your head. Remember we talked about challenging that overthinking?”
The fact she laughed, and then reassured you is awesome, that's a good therapist!
One thing will say is that overthinking is a very bad problem I also face. It isn't easy to get over and I hope you also get rid of that obstacle!
Yeah something similar happened to me recently. I started dating a girl and she's just amazing. But my brain started giving me those questions quickly. Does she love me? Are we a good match? Will this last? What if I'm just telling to my self that I'm feeling something that I don't feel... There was this point where I realized that it takes me about 2 minutes of us making out to become rock hard. So I basically interpreted it as a message from my body: "We like her. Now shut the fuck up, stop overthinking and allow yourself to be happy for once." It's so messed up how far your brain can go to try convincing you that what you feeling is not right or real.
@samueldubik4418 man you made it gross and I regret tapping read more
That's fair. @@PunishedDad
This is why my personality is better and I'm more goofy when I'm lacking sleep. My brain skips a lot of the self awareness and internalized filtering.
Because being sleepy is like being drunk-hold on a second you’re on the money
@@brittahasnofilter He's got a point. Darn.
Oh damn....
Damn. I've literally known this for the longest time but I never knew it until you put it into words… does that make sense?
Edit: Found a quote!!
"You might be emotionally aware of these, but you haven't had the opportunity to really name them yet." - Patrick Teahan
Its literally 4:05 am I feel you-
a classic moment of too much self awareness was when a couple of classmates were laughing and my anxiety was like “they’re laughing at you” and my depression was like “nah they don’t care enough about you to even laugh”
God
Me too
Lmao me when I hear teenagers laughing:
“And I took that personally”
This is an age old tumblr post you can not fool me I remember reading this quote on the internet at 13
@@Angel-jt2pl yeah that’s why it’s even funnier cause happened verbatim in my head
I've been suicidal for months now since my fiance left me, and after seeing this, I'm confident that I'm only blaming myself as a symptom of depression. Which makes it a lot easier to see why I shouldn't kill myself
You deserve life man!! Regardless of what life or other people put you through, being able to recognize your own mental state and how it effects your emotions is important. Remember to be kind to your emotions and feel them so they dont stay stagnant and build up. Nothing is too small to get therapy for(if thats something you want). Im happy to hear you dont want to take your own life and i hope that you have a good support system of people who want to see you thrive, even if you dont feel like you do, there is always someone rooting for you! Take care :)
I hope you get better soon
Depression fucks with your brain, man, sometimes you gotta stop listening to it. Take it a day at a time and focus on what makes you happy (and isn't self-destructive) and you'll come out alright.
I'm sorry you're going through that. Depression makes shit like that so much harder. Good luck to you, I truly hope things improve soon.
Mgtow
this is good to hear. i remember being 12 years old and praying as hard as i could to be able to have "my own thoughts" because it felt like every emotion i experienced was fabricated, steeped in layers and layers of self-reflection. now i can ask my therapist what i can do about it. thank you, this is a game changer.
Holy shit man, I don’t think I’ve ever related to something harder on the entire internet. Just know you ain’t alone man. Hope you’re doing alright
damn this explains why ADHD is often comorbid with depression and anxiety. Overthinking is so damn annoying
Also just growing up w adhd in a neurotypical world, without getting the right help and tools to learn to cope/use your brain effectively tends to be pretty traumatic, leading to anxiety and depression.
Thats me. Depression, Anxiety and ADD, Overthinking is a torture.
Very epic isn’t it
@@Meeptome I’m autistic and absolutely agree with this. I honestly feel more self-aware than the average person I interact with and it’s felt like a curse.
Lmao this is me. I've had a crush for the past 2 months and it's honestly been ruining me with how much I overthink every possible scenario/rejection response/something wrong I might do or say. And when I ask other coworkers for advice they're like just ask her out man ur overthinking it. And I'm just like huh, maybe I am.
I'm always like "wow, this is so insightful" but then I notice twitch chat and I realize that this guy is preaching to rocks
That's...unexpectedly on point. Now, I'm trying to figure out whether there's a single emotion that includes laughing and crying at the same time.
@@Marewig i think overwhelming anxiety or grief could cause that
@@anchorbubba what, grief at the thought of him teaching a bag of rocks?
@@Marewig idk maybe, its usually like something pretty traumatic tho
Twitch chat is just people joking, chill boomer
My desire to stop self analyzing because it makes me miserable vs my hate for people who aren’t self aware FIGHT
Hate for those not-self-aware people is kind of mixed with envy, because it must be so relaxing to just live in total oblivion to yourself . People that are just like the deer looking for food. No inner monologue, no self analysis, just simple existence.
You nailed how I feel.did you get to a solution?
I do envy people who aren't self aware cause they seem happy in their own little world but also they do a lot of damage to others unknowingly and that makes me mad. I'd rather suffer than make others suffer though there are days where I feel being ignorant isn't that bad.. is it? I'd like to be selfish too but isn't me being self aware and thinking about myself 24×7 = being selfish? It's a whole cycle.
@@cassiadsouza709 i keep all the suffering inside me to protect others, so it only hurts me :/
@@cassiadsouza709 just consider that we have the ability to introspect for a very good reason: to develop true self awareness - which requires you to know your position relative to others. without a sense of empathy however, this could prove to be very dangerous (like some psycho idiots thinking they're gods in the flesh or some crap).
my developmental process is hard to remember due to the sheer amount of developing that has occurred, and in a relatively short time. but maybe i can help a bit with a couple of suggestions and an idea, that may or may not be true (at least not exactly): consider the self development process to be akin to the seven stages of grief.
you cant criticise yourself if you aren't self aware (thus aware of your flaws), and if you cant criticise yourself, then you cant intentionally improve.
the problem really lies with what i mean by "improve", improvement is integral to morality, which has no objective truths, thus it is relative.
long story short: self awareness = good. awareness of others (empathy) = good. a heavy dose of stoicism / sigmatism = good.
all three together = kether / ipssisimus / christ conciousness / enlightenment / self actualization etc.
There's a difference between being self-aware and being overburdened with self-consciousness.
A big one
@@redlight3932 Yeah the comments section is a little in the clouds here. As someone who lives in their head, I prefer it. I have the best thought experiments as a result. My latest conclusion is that the Strong Force and the Weak Force are the same Force, after thinking for hours on end about the universe's spin and how it causes gravity; it must also cause quantum gravity as well, once you get past a certain point down the scale into the atomic size. I figure the smaller or less dense the particle, the stronger the attraction, and at the same time on the upper end, the larger and more dense, the more gravity it has.
Thank you! This entire video is a waste. The person from the original post isn't referring to being self-conscious, but instead is referring to being aware of one's own self awareness. I don't think the person has depression or mental health issues, but instead is having an internal philosophical life crisis on self and the existence of being present within.
@@pzkrispy9665 Totally thought the same things while watching. But also the reality is that these types of philosophical life crises are labeled as depression or anxiety or whatever by psychologists, and then treated as such. He's articulating experiences and potential causes (or pseudo-causes) for self consciousness that his viewers very clearly relate too, so I don't know about calling it a waste because he interpreted a tweet differently than you did hahaha. But I also have done kind of an insane amount of philosophical self reflection and investigation recently that seems to have simultaneously worsened and improved by self consciousness problems, in a way a doctor would look at and call 'unsuccessful, conditioned worsened' and just prescribe me a new drug or doses. So I feel a bit sad at the idea of so many people wanting to throw away the process because it can go wrong. To me there's a great sense of importance to the journey of self awareness and exploring your own consciousness that many people seem unaware of, or wary of, here. I'm just too fascinated by the fact that I can do that in the first place to ever want to give it up.
THIS. how come everybody is missing THIS
One of the most important things I have realized in recent years is that there is a fine line between being self-aware and berating yourself for the sake of self improvement and "being honest about yourself". I used to think that being self-aware just meant "assuming the worst about myself" because it seemed the most likely option.
Part of this I feel like is due to human psychology, when we min-max, reducing negatives feels better to us than increasing positives. However, for some fucked up reason, we and our culture tend to judge and punish failure, rather than learn from and forgive failure. In order to live a better life, we must be able to forgive ourselves. Self compassion is something that is hard to do, but is so sweet, and vital to our success.
Dead on the mark. Driving myself insane with a never-ending stream of constant self-reflection.
Very unhealthy, and prevents me from simply getting things done.
So with that in mind I have a question: Do you then just stop "focusing on yourself"?
So, as an example, this past year I've been in situations where I reflected on A LOT of crap that happened.
Yes, it would be time consuming, sometimes even so time consuming that it would take me a week to move on from something that happened, big or small. But the results were always the same: a better understanding of who I was as a person, a better understanding of why this or that hurt me.
Sometimes the pain I felt would still be there. Other times, very few times actually, the pain I felt would be balanced by this force of understanding, and thus that "pain" felt good and more manageable.
Have y'all ever felt like focusing on the "little things" has benefitted you? Because so far it's benefitted me, but then other times I think to myself, "By 'benefit,' do I mean ending up in a happy place?" And then there lies another problem: is the goal to reflect on things in order to stop feeling pain or is the goal to accept the pain that you're feeling?
Sometimes I don't know which is which. For me, when the latter happens it feels more manageable.
@@OrvilleScott for me by benefit i mean what is this showing me about myself i can put to use & advance me to better. My goal is usually to analyze & take accountability so i can learn from what it has shown me so i can be aware enough to not repeat the same pattern vs trying to make the pain “go away” but not really understand why it happened & keeping me on the same hamster wheel of creating the same pain I’m trying to only look at it to lessen it instead of going to the root. If that makes sense
@@OrvilleScott this might seem a bit strange to mention, but: the occult (literally just encrypted psychology), has a concept known as 'the abyss'. the abyss is a state of mind / condition you enter into after a series of events that trigger a specific response / development in regards to your psychological configuration.
this response is determined by 1. your nature / nurture background 2. which 'hand' you entered the abyss from (hand = side. left / right).
the purpose of the left hand path is to "smack you so hard, you wake up", however it always involves negativity towards yourself (almost exclusively due to others regarding you in a negative way). this can lead to intense feelings of resentment / anger, which can progress into a desire for revenge via means like: murder, torture and rape etc. (doesn't even have to be directed at the original source of the 'smack' (generational punishment eg.)
the right hand path is also a hard smack intended to wake you up; only it is administered via proxy pain (empathy), this too can lead to undesirable results.
basically: try to use the pain in a calculated manner for the purpose of self improvement, then when you feel you improved enough: use whatever gives you a sense of inner peace. personally i found faith in god to help massively, but also philosophy and leisure helped massively. rest is just good old fashioned XP and LVL up.
This is why I listen to music so often. I can’t be alone with my own thoughts often because I start over analyzing. So if I fill my head with pretty noise, I don’t have enough room to go full meta on myself. As many other commenters have said, it’s hard to move forward when you spend so much time breaking down everything you JUST did. And then breaking down EVERYTHING that came before it and how it should affect what comes next. And suddenly time has moved forward without you.
Yeah, gives me something else to analyze instead of my myself lol
took the jumbled words right out of my brain. My favourite thing to do is start doing some action while thinking of a thousand reasons not to do it, like waking up to go to college on time. Purely because, I know later on I will think " imagine if I hadn't woken up on time I'd been so late". I think my time away, before I know it hourse go by.
For me it wasn't music but gaming. Don't have time for IRL meta analysis when you're trying get 100% completion.
I play the music in my head when i dont have access lol
I just say to myself “some music all day keeps the demons away” and what you said is such a better explanation
I actually talked to my therapist about this and we came up with tools for me to not intellectualize emotions all the time. My level of self awareness became a barrier to experiences. I feel a lot better now.
Do you have any tips to pass along? This is the exact problem I've had and couldn't get my past therapists to understand :')
@@autumn-null6852 I never thought about how difficult this would be to explain in writing but I'll definitely try. I hope this helps you! It's going to sound really simple but it takes a lot of work.
1. Realize why I was intellectualizing emotions instead of processing them-- I was constantly surrounded by people experiencing explosive emotions so I *had* to suppress mine. I used to think I had to validate what I was feeling intellectually then suppress it.
2. Feeling safe to experience emotions instead of barriering-- there are certain situations and people I didn't feel comfortable emoting around, figuring out where I felt comfortable was the next part
After that I felt a monumental shift in how I experiences emotions bc I was out of the situation that required me to suppress. It took a lot of work, but every time I found myself starting to intellectualize, I would almost try to snap myself out of it. I stopped asking other people for advise on how to react to things, just trusting my own gut. If I found myself trying to explain what I was feeling, justifying it instead of just experiencing it, I'd just stop talking for a while. For me there's both a coping and a people pleasing element to why I feel I had to overly intellectualize my feelings, so I had to learn to address that. And there's a lot of people online who talk about how not to be a people pleaser, and that helped a little for me.
"Intellectualize emotions" is a great way to describe what sends me down a spiral sometimes. I really have to stop myself short and say "it'll be okay tomorrow" or "it's okay to feel like this right now" instead of trying to problem solve or dig deep on a simple negative emotion!
@@cattusahoy "It'll be okay tomorrow" sounds a whole lot like trivializing your emotions to me. Most critically, it doesn't address what's happening in the _now._
@@CoralCopperHead
"Okay" may mean opposed to "wrong" like you're doing something wrong by feeling or thinking something, rather than "this is fine and doesn't need addressing". Accepting what you feel rather than trying to not feel it.
Maybe.
I used to be horribly aware and recently I just kind of realized I'm just a person. I can make mistakes and that's okay, and I can just as easily grow from it. Allowing myself to be morally gray and not live up to the impossible expectations of being a "perfectly good person" or "mary sue" has helped me a lot. That doesn't mean I don't have my morals or values (I have many strong values I hold and try to live by in my life)- but if I do something a bit silly goofy, I can take a step back and know that at the end of the day I'm only human too. Allowing myself to make mistakes helps me grow in the best way, and embarrassment doesn't last forever.
I had a horrible self-awareness too and then thought the long process of thinking and mental suffering I kinda reached to the thought like "If I'm thinking with my mind clear how to solve situations and after the thought process make a mistake - I'm not bad I just mistaken"
I am highly self aware if there is some kind of risk attached to my decision. I suddenly feel unsure about everything. The worst moment is if I was supposed to know something but I don't. I get really stressed and can't get out of it, knowing that's all because of my incompetence. I do not wish to happen to anyone, it's paralyzing.
bruh I tried this too but it kept repeating the cycle 😢
This is precisely the problem a lot of people on here have. Overthinking and reflecting too much causes crippling self doubt, perfectionism, idealism and paralysis. Being afraid to do anything in case you fail or get criticism makes you a slave to other people and prevents you from living YOUR life. A little bit of main character syndrome is actually good for you.
He who does not reflect is nothing more than an animal. He who reflects too much will never credit himself for being human.
someone stick this on a picture of a sunset and sell it on white lady birthday cards
@@summermetcalfe5236 literally ruclips.net/video/UknhhXEuTmY/видео.html
It wont stop us from being aware animals anyway
deep
Did you make this up? If so, nice.
psychatrists when they get depression: "shit. my default mode network is acting up again"
😂😂😂
Dark 😅
"I'll just take some ketamine"
@@kairoofficial5722 "under my own supervision"
@@kairoofficial5722 mr krabs overdoses on ketamine
When I say I have a problem and people say "well at least you're self aware" I'm kinda like no, I think the fact that I'm self aware makes it worse. Like I know it's a problem but I keep doing it anyways. I feel like that's worse than not knowing it's a problem at all, because now I'm actively *not* fixing the problem
Edit: yo I just want to say that I wrote this when I was feeling really down on myself, but I don't want this to make anyone else feel bad about something that they didn't previously feel bad about. Self awareness can be bad when it's causing you to beat yourself up about your problems, but really it's the beating yourself up about it that's more harmful. Don't be too hard on yourself if you have issues that you're struggling to address, because even just by this thread you can see that it's pretty common to feel that way, especially if you have a lot going on because it can get overwhelming. Please everyone just try to take care of yourself. Shit is hard but if it helps a little know that we're in it together
Ouch, i felt that on a personal level
This. And constantly not fixing the problem leaves me exhausted all the time.
I disagree. I feel like knowing the problem is the first step to fixing it. For a really long time, I didn't know the issues that I had, so I fucked up all the time. Once I realized, there was this huge wave of shame and guilt that overcame me (which sucks at first, but now I'm glad I went through that) and step by step, I started to change my behaviour. It's baby steps, you know? You'll get there one day, I promise.
It’s horribly exhausting. That intuitive recognition is what’s interesting though. One could then develop and train oneself to reject the self-awareness with an understanding of our instinctive responses to comments like that. That level of mindfulness is the only thing that really helped me when I recognized that stuck feeling
@@lo4568 you miss the part where the shame and guilt is constantly overcoming you and you dont do anything about it, which makes you feel even more ashamed and guilty because you realise you are feeling this way and yet do nothing, hence the comment.
This gave me a lot of insight into my own mental health! I have the whole “overly self-aware” thing going on and it results in A) frustration and guilt because I have that knowledge but can’t use it to improve myself, and B) therapists mistakenly believing my issues are less severe than they really are because I talk about them in such a calm, clinical manner, thus unintentionally teaching me that my problems aren’t bad enough to require therapy. It’s good to hear a new, more helpful perspective on this!
Ah yes the "I just spilt my spaghetti and the world would be such a better place without me" effect
You broke your spaghetti? Please dump the boiling water you were gonna use to make it on yourself as punishment
Edit: nvm you said spilt not split
Das (that's) a cute duck.
@@gary4014 Dude, that got dark... I should probably expect that from a comment section of a video about depression though.
Everyone goes through the “World would be a better place without me” effect after losing an argument with their parent(s).
It sounds insane, but my cheese sauce not thickening led to me walking to a high bridge.
"girls = deer food"
twitch chat is both a blessing and a curse
Nice
XD
God brain
mostly just curse
Twitch users don't deserve human rights
Its comforting that there is a community of people that understand and can relate to this as a reality
God, I absolutely hate analyzing every minute detail of my day to day, my past, my future, etc. 😞
@@randomdude5433 youre romanticizing it man, analysis paralysis is gonna bite you in the ass
Try and occupy your mind with thoughts that aren't so egocentric. We live in a vast world that has never been easier to access thanks to the internet, its good to think about yourself and improvement, but to obsess over anything can be detrimental.
Just start to meditate Daily every morning for 20min it will fix it.
I've taken up meditation and so far it's helping a bit, when you catch these thoughts try to notice them and move your mind to the present moment and your surroundings
You probably trained yourself doing it, you need to stop judging yourself. Also if its that bad just do 5 minuets of meditation everyday it accumulates, it softens the default network
I studied creative and professional writing at uni, and I remember them pointing out that a lot of poets who took their own lives wrote in first person and said “I” a lot more in their writings near the ends of their lives. When people are feeling depressed or sad or nervous, they use “I” statements more. It’s interesting how the frequency that you use “I” in your writings can potentially reflect changes in your mental state.
that is so interesting
Is there an article on it?
This was a problem for me. My most negative/depressed thoughts always began with "I" and especially "I wish". So whenever my brain started talking to me starting with "I", I trained myself to cut the voice off immediately. This helped me a lot.
@@atanamorell2 I think reflecting on your thinking patterns and deliberately trying to think more positively is a great strategy when you catch yourself thinking negatively.
Things like “awe walks”, volunteering to help others (even a friend or family member), and just spending time with people can help get someone out of their heads a bit too and and help them engage more with the world around them instead of dwelling on things internally. Sometimes it’s also good to just verbalise what you’ve been thinking to someone else you trust who can let you know whether your thoughts are rational, and speaking with a mental health professional is a good way to learn strategies to rewire your thinking for the better.
I’m not suggesting these things to you specifically. Just to anyone who reads this
Generic Name Those are all great tips! There is hope for us all to move away from behavior and thought patterns that drag us down.
i feel like my therapists dont even know how to help me bc i come in and explain everything and they're like "so you already know whats going on" and im like "yes but what do i do"
This is the reason why I don’t want to go to a therapist, it’s because I already know everything and I don’t think therapists will think I’m genuine if I know everything
Yea tbh I sometimes don’t understand why people even go to those therapists, they’re just professional talkers not helpers.
It’s like you telling a mechanic your car issues, then he just repeats your car issues back to you.
Therapists can be VERY hit or miss. Some of them definitely just sit there and listen, but a GOOD therapist will give you tips and tricks on how to better yourself or on how to process issues you have. Depending on where you live finding a good one might be very difficult or far too expensive.
I've been to two, the first one was very good, but retired. My current one isnt as good, but i still feel it is good to go just to have a discussion about mindsets, keeping track of progress etc.
makes me glad my first therapist was a good one. i genuinely cant imagine what wouldve happened if id said "im pretty sure somethings wrong with me and i think this is why" and she was just like "damn bro that sucks" instead of "okay, lets work this out" 💀
@@amazingnobodyleeI can tell you one of your problems for free, you think you know everything. Trust me, with every year you get older you realize new things about yourself and get deeper understandings on your issues. You don't and never will know everything, that's just part of being human
This also explains why self-centered and closed-minded people seem to be so much happier. Incapable of asking questions, incapable of being disturbed by the possible answers.
"ignorance is bliss" - gandolf
in which state would you rather live?
This is such a hard question lol
But by being overly self-aware and preoccupied by yourself, aren’t you being closed minded and self-centred in a way?
@@MCart1215that’s the most self-aware thing anyone could say
I'm a psych major, so whenever a therapist starts to go down a road or ask me certain questions, I already know what they're doing. That's why I like Dr. K; he uses different discussions and solutions than most therapists, and he always manages to surprise me with how he thinks.
which is kind of tragic that most therapists all do the same method
I'm not even a psych major, but I've been doing the same thing for friends since I was an adolescent. I learned to separate giving my own advice from simply talking them through their problems (much like a therapist does) at a young age.
Is it because they actually dont open you up personally?
@@unsanitizedbabywipes6154 yeah, they always try this "goal-oriented" approach that feels way too linear and doesn't allow me to open up to them based on how I feel. I don't see a therapist necessarily because I have goals, I see them because I don't feel good, y'know?
@@simonboone623 yes why therapy didn’t do shut for me. i felt i was being as raw and down to earth with them and i felt as if they were not truly listening to my problems and giving me answers like google would or sonething
I've attempted to go to counseling before, and it's never helpful because the therapist always underestimates how much I've already thought about the problem.
This ‼️I literally just quit therapy a few weeks ago thinking it’ll take forever (years) to get to anything real. Lady, I’ve already thought about my issues 10 levels deep! I don’t need a walk down self awareness ave. I need a stronger, broader perspective so I can get out of this hole!
Same :^(
It really depends. I think sometimes the therapists have a good Insight and new perspective to offer from a first impression of the issue after all of you going to deeply into the issue yourself for years. And sometimes the issue is newer and you couldn't think about it that deeply yet is also true
super late reply haha, but I found going to a therapist who was open to talk therapy rather than CBT really helpful.
Yeah same I always felt like they were telling me what I already know
I've recently finally been working on a similar problem. I could never get a health care professional, because they would all say "you're articulating your problem very well and the steps you want to take, you're doing fine". The first part is true. I massively overcompensated my lack of social development in my teens into becoming very empathatic, but in a way that I am very good at analyzing emotions but quite bad at actually feeling and handling them.
I hope health care pros take a good lesson from my story and this video: don't mistake competence with health.
This ^
This has been exactly how I have felt for so long before I went to a psychiatrist for my depression. I would internalize that thought in myself (still do and am working on that) that because I am able to process what is going on in my mind, I can handle it myself. That is exactly opposite of the case. This ability to analyze emotions and empathize with people who experience it has made me into this massive people pleaser, where I have prioritized everything but myself. I am not okay right now, but your situation has helped me realize I am not alone.
I wish you luck on your journey, and I will keep this in mind in hopes I can improve upon this and actually get the help I need. I may know what's wrong, but I certainly am unable to get myself out of it. I've been stuck in this cycle of knowing what all I can do to feel better and improve myself, but I don't take it in increments. I try to tackle all of it at once, which has brought be back to square one basically every time. Thanks for this. Competence does not equal health.
@@noahmathenia3292 what worked for me was a haptotherapist. Who knows, might be your thing too. Good luck in any case!
You just described my exact situation
I went to a psychoanalyst and she said something similar, and I was really upset about it at first. But she then continued saying, still something must’ve brought me to her and she hypothesized about how this rationalization and competent appearance i made, could be a safety measure for the other, unresolved, hurtful parts of me to not come out. So it’d keep people at distance. That clicked hard for me and I felt really seen. Since then I have practiced living my emotions more and developed a little alarm nerve when I rationalize too hard
the majority of my days are great until a completely minor non-issue sends me into a spiral and i feel paralyzed. my therapy sessions are usually me asking wtf is wrong with me when in reality i’m making myself suffer by trying to answer that question, especially when my thinking and behaviors are in part trauma based. prioritizing just existing and easing that self judgement is my main focus in life right now. thank you for sharing your knowledge on this topic.
That happens to me too. I recently moved to a new home and I swear every little stressor that popped up would put me through a spin. When I sit down and think about my PERSONAL experience with this. I think its cause I dont have the self confidence that I will succede when a problem arises. So I need to give my self more pats on the back when I have a win and give myself the benifit of the doubt. When something stresses me out I say " you got this , you got this" over and over again till I stop thinking about how I am gonna fail and fill my head with "you got this" lol
Same! Wishing you goodluck with that
I’ve come to this conclusion a long while ago and this video just confirmed my suspicions even more, “ignorance is bliss” is not just a saying, it’s the truth
There's nothing sane about being well-adapted to a fucked up society.
The blue pill leads to happiness and fulfillment but also a schlong up your backside
The red pill lets you see who's schlong it is and you're aware of it every second of every day without freedom from the torment
Ignorance may be bliss but ignoring a cliff won't save you from walking off of it.
@@GANONdork123 neither will knowing one is coming lol
@Victor Kreig You can only react to what's ahead if you look at what's ahead. Of course if you're too busy worrying about the cliff instead of moving forward then you'll never get anywhere. There's a middle ground between freezing in place and blindly walking forward.
I'm so overly self reflective that I reflect on my self reflection which usually makes me feel a bit better, like "I'm such a loser" then I think, "wait I'm not a loser I just feel immense self hate because of my depression and constant self reflection over every single one of my issues" And even now I feel like I'm overthinking the fact that this comment feels very braggy but I know I'm just using it to solidify my thoughts into words.
Self reflection can be helpful and unhelpful, it sounds like you're using your powers for good! I'm glad you're using it to be kind to yourself. It's not bragging, recognizing strengths is a good thing
@@LeavesofLilac Thank you. I kinda needed a few good words today 😁
@@smiles9882 ❤❤❤
I guess I can share my experience too. I feel like I mastered my conscience in that way that I can control my emotional state in any way i want. Like I know what I have to do to make myself feel worse or energized without any medicine. It happened after a long-term depression (like a year or so) I was heartbroken 19 year old cos I got friendzoned by someone I fell in love with and I feel like I still love. Firstly I did a little research about what is the fundamental function of my senses and conscience. Found out it's all about getting and processing feedback from the environment, think about it, your getting information outside and inside environment to be prepared. But the whole thing of processing is giving the answer to it, to interpretate this info. I started thinking not how I feel myself in this situation but how it actually is. What happens objectively, not estimating it. It really helped me to understand that I'm overthinking situation quite sometimes. It helped me a ton and shortly after did a research how my nervous system reacts to different cases to change my emotional state and started to use it in my everyday life. Hope it helps someone
I do the same, and it really helps me process my negative emotions. I'm glad you put it into words for other people to find
I remember really digging into a non-self aware person for the first time and being totally mind blown. Like youre not constantly thinking?? all the time?? its such a weird thing to think about. people really just be living in the moment. i do not have the ability to do that. at all.
I literally had this exact talk with my husband last night. He is sufficiently self aware but isn't burdened by it. I told him to take me through his day and tell me what is happening in his head from morning to night, I was shocked by how little he is over thinking and just living in the moment. He is full of energy and I am always too tired because my thoughts are too exhausting. Today is my first day of my challenge, I am going to live in the moment and think of nothing more than that. I am going to use my self awareness as a gift to catch myself when I am over reflecting or over analysing myself or any situation and bring myself to the present. I am hoping it will go well, I applied this technique for my struggle with body image issues so I hope this will work in general too! Otherwise people like us will always be depressed and burnt out :(
@@Kiwipump47 This is an impressive and constructive way to use your awareness to your benefit. Can I ask how this went?
@@siritalis4956 believe it or not it actually seems to be working! I still have excessive thoughts but I have set aside a time during the day for myself to let my brain wander off but when I am at a task I think about nothing other than the task and if I catch myself drifting, I consciously bring my awareness to whatever task I am doing, even if it's boring and focus only on that. Background music helps to make a mundane routine task interesting, I know I will drift if it is too boring lol. And it worked! If it gets too much I journal what's in my head, so it's out on the paper and out of my head. My head went from head full of too many thoughts to a moderate amount. My energy levels are higher than ever, but my mind is all calm at the same time. Anxiety has improved tremendously because I am not constantly thinking of what I should be or could be doing etc. I guess it was indeed that simple, the world may be more complex now but we gotta keep it simple in our heads haha.
Edit: husband also agrees with me, been more energetic lately and social events are easier too. I celebrated Christmas and was worried so much because it's exhausting for me normally, especially because family events happen in french haha meaning extra brain effort, more fatigue (husband is french I am not) . To my surprise I managed to enjoy the social event even with my limited french. All these stupid thoughts of "how do I appear to them, is my french alright, am I making a fool of myself, omg if I do this will they think" blah blah were all out of my head
@@Kiwipump47update? I’ve been trying to stop being so self aware for only 24 hrs and I hope I can keep it up cause I’m starting to feel great
People don’t think like this???? This is new information to me.
This makes so much sense. I have depression, and sometimes it feels like im constantly analyzing my emotions. All it does is cycle into anxiety, which cycles into depression.
Bro I literally just had ANOTHER psychiatrist tell me “you’re very smart and reflective”, which is of course flattering but also frustrating because people tend to assume I’m fine just because I’m not acting out my neuroses and causing a scene, doesn’t mean I’m not deeply hurting. Thankfully at least this one sees through my being “smart” and “self aware” and is actually getting me the help I need.
were you able to find the help you needed?
@@saxpy sorta! I’m doing much better and am seeing a therapist that does really structured therapy methods (I have brain homework now lol). Mental health isn’t a binary, but now that I have better relationships and a better therapist, I’m certainly much more on the road to being mentally healthy than I was. Thanks for asking!
@@alluneedislessthan3 would you be willing to share what kind of things your brain homework entails? It seems quite interesting
What they're really saying is "We want to boost our ego by pointing out something about you that makes us seem insightful, thereby bolstering our nonexistent authority to tell you what to put in your own body.
, probably.
@@havenbastion Eh I have been told the same thing by several people, but they never recommended any medication.
This also makes sense why I get so obsessed with fictional worlds, cause that's pretty much the only time I'm not analyzing myself, but the story or a character that interests me. New ideas and concepts make me feel very excited, and while I analize them I feel that rush of excitement because that's what my brain feeds on. And those new ideas inspire me and give me fresh new information to work with and have fun with its details. In addition, if I can relate to a character, it's even better. Tho, once I go through all of the details and there's nothing new presented in that certain story, I go over it and find a new interest. This explains why my interests are so all over the place and why I'm so indecisive about my career choice. This alone makes me feel so lost in this world. Like I'm not good enough for anything, yet have a lot of potential (at least that's what everybody tells me). It's such a pain, cause I want to be more productive and work harder, but I'm so mentally exhausted. I have no motivation at all. And I'm inconsistent even with my hobbies. And here comes the guilt. I'm not even doing anything and have no reason to be tired of everything all the time, but in reality my mind is a complete mess.
Edit: This is also interesting to know since few weeks ago I started suspecting I had adhd (inattentive type) and as I've done so much research on it, it's like my third eye opened. Everything in my life, all my issues and behaviour makes sense and I heavily relate to people who have adhd. I won't go into details here but I'm so relieved that I found a community of people who understand. I feel like all of my struggles are finally validated.
Edit 2: Thank you all so much for sharing your own stories, I never expected to get this many replies. It's amazing how we can all connect and feel less alone although we never met. And also, remember to be kind to yourself, I'm sure you're trying your best, so don't push yourself too hard. Your health is more important than living up to some impossible standards. Again, tysm! ❤
Oh my gosh...everything you just said relates to me EXACTLY.
@@louiebinousky3699 At least we're not alone in this. I hope you're doing well
I thought I wrote this omg
hello stranger with exactly the same life story!! I recently got diagnosed with inattentive AD/HD 3 months ago and glad to see in tour update that now you know you are dealing with inattentive AD/HD!! Thanks for this comment it makes me feel less alone 😭😭
Lmao that is me so much lol I'm not diagnosed with Inattentive AD/HD but yeah it is me it's so accurate lol.
Worst thing about self-awareness or being 'self conscious' is that makes you doubtful about what to say or do, because you start thinking about variables, often times weighing more negative outcomes and it goes from assessing danger or potential outcomes to literally hindering yourself.
So annoying, stupid me!
Same here. Im like did I word it right? Is my tone too aggressive? Did they fully understand me? I wish I could stop doing this but I am like this because I dont want to hurt anyone.
@@rainystormy6128 Someone is always going to get hurt, specially nowadays when everyone is so sensitive. I've gotten to a point where I'm sure of what I say for the most part, so I usually don't care if people get offended anymore. It's lifted a huge weight off me. This doesn't mean being unnecessarily disrespectful or anything though.
@@rainystormy6128 this happens to me too, still does but I think I've started to think less about other peoples thoughts about me, its just easier that way
I used to think this. But then I realised it can be a blessing, as well as a curse.
(Novel incoming...)
I had really, really bad social anxiety. I usually find myself... disassociating from situations where I'm talking to people- so, I'll walk away from an interaction and literally have no recollection of what was said or done by me or the other, then I get into a twist about whether I said something stupid or not, or missed important information. I found that being this way meant I had no control over my emotions. I was toxic.
So, I started to ground myself. I started telling myself that I have to make myself present for these interactions. I have to slow down and really absorb what's happening and what's being said.
I've found that by doing this I can control what I say and do more so I don't do something that makes me feel foolish.
My self-awareness used to burden me with my own anxious thoughts. Now, it helps me learn from them.
"I'm anxious about this, so I'll do it this way instead."
This has actually, genuinely cured the social panic I've had almost my entire life.
It doesn't sound like it, but I no longer overthink everything.
(I can even recognise the very moment this happened to me. The moment I took control of my self-awareness.)
I actually developed another crisis because of this... I started thinking I was totally apathetic. I felt like, and still kind of feel... numb. Like, smiling numb. Not sad inside. I'm not sad at all. I'm genuinely happy and ubeat. All. The. Time. My mood goes down so rarely, EVERYONE can see when it happens.
But at the end of the day, I make it my goal to, at the very least, be pleasant despite the numbness. I don't let my feelings of numbness/emptiness dictate the way I respond to or treat people. I'm not nihilistic.
My numbess comes to me in the form of... not giving a crud what anyone thinks of me. I also feel like I don't invest myself into other people emotionally. So, it feels like a negative. It feels like I've chosen the smiling mask- because this is the mask that avoids the need to invest emotionally. I avoid drama, conflict, gossip, lies and lying- but I also avoid love and connection with others.
I'm friendly, but I don't want friends, but I won't let you know that.
It's not fake. My friendliness is genuine. It just feels... like... there's nothing behind it.
Here's an example... when my beloved Corgi of 15 years passed away, I didn't cry. I felt relieved for her. I feel like that was wrong. I was shocked and frustrated that I wasn't a snotty mess over her death. I convinced myself it was because I was expecting this for six months. From the moment of her first seizure, I knew I'd be losing her soon, and I knew the day it all ended for her that she'd no longer be suffering... but still... 15 years with that dog I called a soul-daughter and not a single tear? I genuinely loved her. I actually sobbed the day my other dog destroyed a little plant I received with her cremains. I loved her, but didn't feel anything except relief when she passed. In fact, I was riding a high. She was put to sleep in her own bed at home by a mobile vet, and when they took her away to be cremated, I had nothing but positive feelings.
When it comes to people- I can detatch myself from them in the blink of an eye. I had a friend of 15 years. A best friend. The only real friend I've had. Well, this friend became toxic, so I ended the friendship, and I haven't missed this person for a second. I've never felt the need to grieve our friendship. I feel relieved. I feel lighter.
I've been this way for 10 years now. I've never "crashed" emotionally. I feel like I'm floating through life like a pleasant smell...
Self-awareness is a blessing a curse, but in my case, the blessing outweighs the curse. It feels good being friendly. I'm just thankful I'm not bitter, resentful, envious, anxious, or disassociative anymore. I have a healthier relationship with socialising and myself, even if some parts of myself still confuse and concern me (the numbness).
Thank you for sharing
Now it's feels like i am not alone
The numbness you talked about is exactly what i am experiencing
"What i do is genuine, me being friendly is genuine but i am not emotionally invested into you, i love you , i want you yo be with me, but so numb get butterflies "
I think i know what triggered my numbness and excessive self awareness
First i will share about awareness
I grew up in a very strict household
I mean it never has to be that strict
Every thing i did that had to according to my dad
The way i speak
I words i use
The way i drink water
The way i eat
Even when i laughed and had fun with someone else my dad used to say i am useless i just laugh and waste time i do nothing important and he was always frustrated with me with everyone i guess .
It had be in his way literally everything
The i way i wash my hand
He scolded me
He used to beat me
I was a kidddd
So i guess to avoid all that i became aware
Always wondering did i do something wrong?
Am i going get beaten?
I started to overthink everything
I lived in constant fear
So that's how i developed excessive self awareness i think i developed numb too
Because i had to deal with all that shit everyday so i preferred to accept it and not to take it as big deal basically i said fu$$ it , it's a routine why should i be sad or anything but i didn't know i would lose feelings all my emotions
To explain my numbness there is another story when i was a teenager i was topper in my class it was in 10th standard
A girl used to talk to me
And i got attached
She was not a that great of a person , she used to flirt with everyone
But in my class she made it look like she only wanted me
I also had trust issues since childhood
So i Didn't really believe her
I wanted to play safe game
But i got attached cos we talked everyday in class flirted
When i talked to other girls she used to get jealous
So time went on
After 10th we had a misunderstanding and she blocked me
As i said was little numb already i wasn't that sad or anything but later on i realized a pattern when something bad used to happen i didn't felt sad instantly but it took some days then i felt sad
Then one day she texted me suddenly my body was shaking my heart was beating fast i guess i realized anxiety attack then
After that whenever she talked on texted me i felt that way
Days passed i slowly trained my self to not to care about her not to think about her
I watched videos explaining how to stay away from love how to move on how to forget
And i did move on but in all this i isolated my self i lost friends i gained stress overthinking, numbness anxiety, disconnection from reality etc i don't know what else i have..
Turns out my emotions are gone
I don't feel anything now.
I want to feel again
I want to know what it feels to be sad ,happy, scared, from heart
What it feels like to live without my brain constantly reflecting my actions
My story is still left.
It's a relief to share all this.
you didn't lie about it being a novel
Same but im kinda the opposite i let out my emotions more often when i ground myself and let myself be present and tbh it goes randomly sometimes i cant keep track of my emotions and what i actually feel
Are you an INFJ??
The doorslam, the over analysis of oneself, social awareness & awkwardness
And I can see facets of my life superimposing with yours (I too had a cat, my heartbeat)
I really hope that may you find real peace in this non-peaceful world
I used to be like that , and i couldn't understand why. I wasn't able to talk normally to people anymore, to look at myself like a decent human being, i couldn't feel who i was or what makes me, me. I thought i was cursed or doomed to live in that miserable condition for the rest of my life, and as soon as i thought that i started thinking about suicide. Long story short: I struggled for 2 years and then when i started making music again , finding other interests/ hobbies/passions , forcing myself to go out , to speak to people (even if i was sweating as soon as i thought of doing it) and eventually i stopped thinking about myself all the time and only about what i am doing or what i'm going to do. Had to face a couple of demons on my own (Past memories) figuring out why i felt so bad all the time, i think that's the hardest part.
For those of you in this situation, keep fighting and remember that if you can't feel the struggle , you won't feel the victory.
Just wanted to share.
This makes me want to fucking cry. The first half is exactly me except im still stuck here.. I hope i can turn this bs off and live a normal life. Seeing your story does give me hope that its possible.
Thanks for sharing.
@@catalinasimon9215 I feel you, I hope it'll get better soon or that you at least meet someone you can go through it with 🌜✨ at this point I'm just happy I found this to know I'm not the only one going through this. Whenever I try to explain to others I guess it doesn't come out the way I thought? And they just brush it off as me complaining or they don't even listen enough to try to understand it.. sorry for the essay 🙏
Thank you for sharing your story, I actually screenshotted it for myself because I am there right now, and it really helps
I just screenshotted this too cause I've kinda been in a bad place, and this was lovely to hear. Thank you for sharing
A Dr.K a day keeps the Dr. K away
Smartge
6head
*Ah yes a very high IQ 10 Head BIG BRAIN MOMENT*
@@proger1960 who are you
@@sadface7457 99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999head
Being self conscious and self aware are two totally different things. Taking the example into consideration. Being self conscious is feeling anxious thinking no one at the party wants to talk to you. While being self aware is acknowledging the fact that you're anxious because of your own thoughts, not necessarily because others don't like you.
Someone who’s got it right 👏🏾
Very well said!
Thank you. One of the most ironic things about human psychology/mental health is how much we think we know about ourselves vs how wrong our preconceived notions really are.
You can technically be both at the same time tho
You can be self aware that its just thoughts while still being stuck roominating over and over
@@Thelonelyreign definitely but most people that experience anxiety are self conscious but not self aware
My self awareness is so deep, that it’s “I’m aware that I’m having these thoughts and I know exactly the point in time where my depression started and I’m also aware of the subconscious part of my brain where all of these thoughts come from.”
I’ve been told many times by counselors that I’m highly self aware and that I should be counselor. But how can I help others if I can’t even help myself.
My self awareness gives me anxiety, which exhausts me, which makes me procrastinate making it hard to get up. As all this is happening I’m completely aware of all of it, yet still hating myself for every second of it all.
I also have that... In my experience, the best approach is to change the tone of your inner voice/your awareness. Imagine you're infront of the child-you when you start to procrastinate. How would you treat the kid? instead of hating yourself for procrastinating, try to guide yourself out of the spiral.. i try to talk to myself positively when i start to get anxiety - try to become aware of the actual thoughts that make you anxious / make you procrastinate and try to change those. If you understand why you're procrastinating, instead of just hating yourself for it, you will find a better way to deal with it, a more relaxed way
Adding to the comment above- I used to have a "glass half empty" perspective/inner voice in my early teens (I also had anxiety and depression). With some training I could pick out more of the positive in people/situations/myself instead of just hyper-focusing on the negative. It's a lot of work, but think of it as daily stretches for your mind...over the years it's helped me a lot. It sounds corny but write/say 3 things you did well or like about yourself everyday.
Also talking to others about these feelings helps a ton, not even just to a professional, but to family and friends who are understanding (mine weren't super understanding, but it was really good to just get it off my chest). I do suggest seeking professional help if you're able.
Accepting your flaws is a huge hurdle to overcome, but it's possible and takes time, so don't be too hard on yourself.
Sorry for the long comment, you remind me a lot of myself so I'm hoping some of this helps. I wish you all the best ❤️
Find some positive truths about yourself that you know to be true and use them against your thoughts. Knowledge facilitates action and the only thing that can stand between what you know and what you do is your thoughts.
same
No, that doesn't give you anxiety. You're the opposite of self-aware and are making a much bigger deal of things than they are.
“It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.”
I love this so much
@@brittahasnofilterThat quote is by Aristotle. Here are a few more:
All of humanity's problems stem from man's inability to sit quietly in a room - Blaise Pascal
I know nothing except the fact of my ignorance. True knowledge exists in knowing that you know nothing - Socrates
True wisdom comes to each of us when we realize how little we understand about life, ourselves, and the world around us - Socrates
The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes. . . but in having new eyes - Marcel Proust
The ultimate ignorance is the rejection of something you know nothing about yet refuse to investigate - Dr. Wayne Dyer
If you would be a real seeker after truth, it is necessary that at least one in your life you doubt, as far as possible, all things - Rene Descartes
This comment section is pretentious af.
@@pj7371 Anti-intellectualism inevitably leads to mediocrity
@@MadsterV copy pasting quotes from google is not an “intellectual” conversation my guy.
I'm autistic and this is me to a bloody tee. I am constantly reflecting and manually running scripts in my head to smoothly exist in social situations. After 20 years of this, it's eating away at my mind somewhat.
I'm going thru this too, I feel you... I feel so mentally and physically exhausted
I'm autistic aswell and I know what you're talking about. In periods of my life where I was very shy or had super bad social phobia I became "the observer", I struggled to make friends because of the shyness so I mostly just observed what other people did being stuck with my own thoughts to overthink EVERYTHING. And also me constantly researching my own flaws on the internet for self improvement also contributes to the overthinking. Self improvement isn't bad on the surface but maybe I have become somewhat obsessed with it feeling like I need to be this perfect human to be accepted. I know that I have made some big self improvements over time but I still feel like I'm not good enough. Like every time I don't get chosen for a job I get the feeling that the person that got chosen must be this perfect human that I can never compare to. I basically put other people on this pedestal of being pure perfection while viewing myself as absolute filth trash. I'm worried that no matter how much I self improve that I will never be good enough.
I know that it's totally irrational and that no human can be perfect so why am I even thinking like that??
i started to try meditation(without the whole esoterik stuff) for it. meditation focuses exactly on this point. yes its about high self awareness, but in a konstructiv way. just try to focus on your breathing for 5 minutes, 4 seconds in and4 out without holding!!! Feel every bit like never before. This works like a mantra(mantras are used to focus your thoughts in line) you also can counting in your mind to 4 so that you become quickly aware that your thoughts drifting away. for the beginning it should help!!!
I feel this. I understand this too well dude. But for me at least it helps to know that it's not my rational brain, it's like standing at a cliff and it just pops into your head "but what if you jumped" I never asked that question, and I don't care about the answer.
Knowing helps, but it's hard to tune out sometimes. Some days I mentally scream or loop some word or phrase to try to drown out the other thoughts and every once in a while this reflection just cuts right through, that's when it's at it's worst. When it's like that I can't even calm my head down enough to sleep until lack of sleep has dulled my mind enough to let me tune it out.
It sucks but it can get better, medication has made those sleepless nights far less common, though a change atm is bringing it back a bit.
But I think I understand what you mean. To me it's this nagging feeling that my personality is not my own but something I've fabricated like some suit. That I am always lying to others about who I am, that if they actually knew me we that they would be repulsed for some reason.
I feel you tbh
The worst part of self awareness is that you can be aware of your unhealthy coping mechanisms and watch helplessly as you resort to them again. You're doing what you always do and the self-aware part of you is yelling "No! Not again! Why? Why do you do this?" It's like an extra bonus level of suffering.
me to a friend earlier today: "it'd be nice if I could at least be dumb enough not to watch myself sabotage myself in realtime every time lol"
Fr
Same
This is fucking gold.
When you're so self-aware of your self-awareness that you need to turn off your self-awareness in order to be aware of others instead of yourself
And you try to turn off your overly self-awareness but you can’t so you then self-analyze yourself on how you can’t stop being overly self-aware.
@@insomniac760 Hahaha the story of my life.
yus
@@insomniac760 *internal screaming*
do more psychedelics
Small story from the last time I was at a mental health hospital:
They told me I have to use the time to think about myself. It probably wasn’t this exact wording, but that was the message I understood. Instead of watching movies or playing games in my spare time while staying there, I could for example go out for a walk and just deal with my problems. The thing is, the whole year before (2021), I was mostly home alone and thought a lot about my problems. It was way too much and my problems got only worse because of it. They basically insisted at the hospital that I should do what I had done before even though I explained to them that this is the problem.
Omg so sorry for you 😔 sometimes thinking about our thoughts is the last thing we need, some ppl think self-reflection is always good bc it's not a socially-encouraged thing and yeah maybe your average person could use self-reflection. ❤
This was my experience at a mental hospital as well. It was literally the last thing I needed but they forced me to stay. I can honestly say it was the worst experience of my life.
@@QvartzEDM I feel that, I sometimes still dream about going there again
this is why i will never go to a psych ward , no one working there understands mental health which is really really bad lol but thats what happens when you industrialize healthcare
I had problems with mental hospitals as well. Something they kept trying to push is just, getting rid of fears. "I never leave the house because I'm scared someone will find and kill me" "have you considered not thinking about it?"
Mental Hospitals are meant to keep you alive in the moment, they don't actually care about helping you
What I’ve found in my therapy sessions that has really resonated with me is that my self awareness and perceptiveness was a defense mechanism that “justified” or “rationalized” my experiences and behavior. It was a way for me to process things and gain insight on them but now I’m finding there is so much more to these experiences and feelings and you don’t have to just “work through them” you have to BE with them you have to feel these things as they come. I learned that my self awareness and perception was a way to compartmentalize things that are looking to be connected and make me whole again.
I've always thought that having a constantly running thoughts, about anything and everything, and especially pondering on the self and possibilities and turning things in my head over and over that occupied me my entire waking hours were normal, that it's something everybody else does. That is, until my best friend pointed out to me, how "noisy" my headspace must be. To her, if she's not required to actively think about anything, she would just go about her day with literally nothing on her mind and unbothered by anything. It's like her thoughts are always on standby mode in the background while she runs through the motions, and only turns on when needed. No overthinking, no pondering. Clean and organized.
I was just as amazed at that revelation as she was at mine.
Wait, so you say this isn't how all people think? Like people just don't really think and just do stuff?
Wait that's how people do it? I just tried envisioning doing what I do daily without thinking constantly and I could never. My mind has never been empty
@@julial4569 I always had a very "active" internal monologue, my anxiety began at age 12 and now I'm 24. Lots of times in social situations I wasn't really present but more in my head ( 60% of me was in my head and 40% in reality - idk how to explain the sensation very well but I would analyze everything, my surroundings, peoples voices, body language, myself. We all do this unconciounsly, but I was actively thinking about them. ) It was extremely tiring, at one point I was pre thinking almost everything that I was saying, causing stuttering and I almost went to a speech therapist cuz of it. I didn't knew how to stop, Covid actually helped because now everybody had to wear masks and my mind couldn't analyze facial expressions anymore, so it was like a break from it. But what helped the most was a 2 month period in summer when I had my last exams in university and that was all I could think about, I almost had a mental breakdown. But surprisingly it did wonders in reseting my brain. After 2 months of not always thinking about my surroundings or myself I broke out of that habit and now for the first time in my life I am able not to think about stuff all the time, it's very weird, it's just quiet and I can be actually present in the moment. What I learned through this is that habits is what makes us who we are and changing them can do wonders.
From an overanalyzer with an constant internal monologue I jumped almost to the other side of the spectrum and can have 0 internal monologue.
How did she come to the conclusion of your "noisy headspace"?
@@JapKonoko i relate to your comment do much.. Especially about the speak Ing part that has been a problem for me for quite some time.. That pre thinking about what i am saying ať the moment, like ugh i hate it cause i cannot control my own mind.
I've had an attention problem with studying for years now, so much so i dropped out of university because of how stressed i was. The thread that linked all my studying failures together is the fact that I can't, like, control my thoughts enough and calm myself enough to focus on reading, i always get distracted by my daydreams and self-reflective thoughts. It's gotten so bad I've been constantly mentally exhausted regardless of how much i try to relax, exercise, sleep and eat well
I'm the same way
I have the same exact problem. L theanine has helped
Have you found anything that has helped you deal with it?
@@kaivirin Meditation before the task helped me to clear my mind and get some stuff done. Good sleep as well.
Minimizing stress would help a lot but it's hard to do. I try to regulate stress but it's working progress.
Journaling should help too.
And I can't really make myself meditate lately. My mind is somewhere else but practice makes perfect I guess.
this sounds like extremely high level ADHD, I've had this problem as well and I'm considering getting on Adderall just to see if that will help me. I know if I take small bits of caffine throuhgout the day that that helps me
Whenever ketamine brought up I always go to Mr crab ketamine speedrun for some reason
I blame Charlie.
AHOY SPONGEBOB I HAVE OVERDOSED ON KETAMINE ARGARGARGARGARG
That’s what I thought of immediately.
For me, it's Yoda ASMR videos.
MMMMMM. ARRIVED AT THE KETAMINE FACTOR I HAVE
For me it’s doing k
I actually became (quite ironically) self aware about this phenomenon a few months ago and active stop my self from self introspecting too much whenever I catch myself doing it. It's like I go off in a tangent in mind where 'Me' is trying to overanalise my own thoughts and justify its validity and ' I ' have to interrupt 'myself' , i literally tell my self to shut the fuck up in my head some times😂
i say it out loud lol
Sounds like good practice to actually say it out loud :)
Externalizing that voice which we use actively to work against our overly internalizing voices that just block moving on.
Being self aware for me is so hard cuz I know my patterns. I know my illogical thoughts. I know everything about all my faults. So when they still happen, it really tears me down.
You really expect to be able to avoid mistakes just because you know about them?
I mean, at least you're part-way there. Most people don't even notice they've made a mistake and continue to be a burden.
@@TheStrandedAlliance touché. But when I’m in that head space, I can’t stop myself from certain things sometimes. At least that’s how it used to be. Even thinking bout the consequences, I’d still go through with a bad decision. Like quitting a job for example.
@@TheStrandedAlliancewell asking if they really expect knowing what's wrong to help and then implying they're a burden surely can't be helpful.
@@HistorySkatesomething I've been trying to do is counteract that with reflecting on things i am doing good and that could be as simple as getting out of bed or putting away the dishes.
Works pretty well for me, so maybe it'll help for you too.
Actually your wrong
I realize that it was and still is my narcistic and emotionally abusive mom that implanted this overly active self awareness within me. She constantly makes me feel watched, this made me very self aware, this self awareness was developed as a defense mechanism, to scan the possible threats of my mother.
Damn, same with me but i got it from my dad, i got so efficient in dodging abuse from my dad that i completely lost my own desires and thoughts because of this. Im 32 and life is getting better but i really cant figure out where to go in my life because i dont feel that part of myself anymore. I have something in mind about what to work towards/ or plan for in the future but then the doubts start coming and i start to deconstruct everything in a way that everything is irrelevant and pointless to pursue. For me my defense mechanism was this huge emptiness i felt, if i cant feel anything/ nothing feels important, nothing can hurt me.
i feel you mate
Similar story here. I wasn't allowed to read, which was my coping mechanism, because it meant I'd be unavailable to my insecure, anxious mother. She used to get quite upset about it I quickly changed my behavior. I'd start talking to her more about my problems, and she'd never have any advice or perspective, which made me feel anxious and powerless. This set up a disastrous pattern where I was coming to her with ALL my problems and never being guided to solve them myself.
I wish I'd been able to see what was happening so much sooner, but talking and endless analyzing became a crutch I'm now dependant on as an adult. There's a lot of shame now, too, for being pathetic and impotent, unable to do anything or even control my own emotions.... as I used to do naturally as a teenager.
@@tonymahoeney dodging abuse is a pretty good way of explaining it. I often feel ridiculous about how much i care to not get shredded by my dad bc at the end of the day all he does in those instances is say i am lazy or stupid. But I fight every day to limit the chances of that happening. I am relieved i am not the only one
Kinda same for me. But not from mother, everyone around me. And im the faulty one here for being too sensitive. Feel you man.
I’m actually gonna cry. I thought I was insane. I hate how self aware I am. I didn’t realize this was a thing- I’m almost shaking. Thank you RUclips for recommending this video! I’m gonna do my homework now... I’m still processing the fact that I’m not just self absorbed and a terrible person on the verge of insanity.
Hey, me too. Might’ve been on the sane side after all, haha. Hope that homework went well!
This video has been in my recommendation for several days now; today I finally caved and watched it. I'm so glad I did!! This is way too relatable.
I feel you there. It's the point where we can truly feel the value behind "ignorance is bliss". Yet we also know that we'd be mad at ourselves for being ignorant & stupid, because we've already dive in too deep and know the better path that we should be taking instead. The responsible, respectable attitude, even if we can't perfectly fulfill the ideal.
Gotta be patient with ourselves. After all, there are denser people out there who can get away with all sorts of personal flaws we'd curse ourselves if we do it. :P We're a social animal who fill the flaws of each other to progress after all.
Everyone has their flaws & dark sides, some just take it more casually while people like us take it (over-)seriously.
Hope you are feeling better about yourself these days
yeah, it felt pretty revealing for me too.
this explains my desire to get drunk. I've only gotten drunk 2x in my life bc I'm afraid of an addiction bc I KNOW when I'm drunk, I just become confident and less conscious of myself and am free from my constant self analysis. I feel that probably has a strong correlation on why people who are depressed have a tendancy to become alcoholics.
same same same! i'm 17 so i'm obviously not legal but i think i'm going to have to wait until i'm at least 26 or something to drink because i'm really prone to getting addicted to things (books, certain emotional experiences, sugar, etc.) and i feel like if i get drunk i'll want to be that way forever. either that or i'll get so paranoid and lose so much control that i'll want to die
Yeah I don’t feel the need to drink but a strong desire because it helps slow down my mind and help me mellow out. I know that’s not a healthy way of dealing with things so I make it a point to not drink too much or too frequently but it’s tough sometimes trying to control that desire
I absolutely know that this is a huge issue for me. I am hyper aware and am always feeling judged or like I am standing out as an object of ridicule. If I was standing beside someone shorter than me, I felt like people saw me as a giant. I spent most of my life addicted to drugs and alcohol, just trying to make the thoughts quieter. Now I'm in my 40's, I've been clean for 12 years, but the thought of meeting new people is paralyzing. I just can't put myself out there without the crutch.
Explains why I’m so happy and euphoric when I listen to really loud music or have a ton of exciting things going on around me. I can finally stop thinking of everything as a relation to myself and start noticing and living in the outside world.
I’ve been told I have the same thing. It can be helpful at times, however in large it can also be extremely degrading to myself too. What he said about tiny things becoming my fault is extremely true too. It gets to the point where the self reflection becomes irrational but I feel like I can’t control it at times.
Wow I must be lucky then because although I overthink things, and I think all the time about all kinds of things, I do have the capacity to make logical and rational conclusions from things due to this overthinking.
As a result, I'm not so susceptible to depression I feel. But, at times things do get me down. It's probably not helpful that I try my best to be knowledgeable in everything, statistics, probabilities, psychology, ect.
I look 60 years into the future, and plan 30 years ahead. I am wholly aware of the terrible things that I'm inevitably going to experience, and the terrible things that I'm very likely to experience.
It's difficult, and I'd love to be able to just live in the moment, but my personality does not allow this. I MUST plan and be ready for everything. I feel that this way I will have an a lot more easygoing future.
But, there's no way to know in this unfair world whether your hard work will pay off or not. So, only time will tell.
Luckily I have average looks or that would be another whole area about confidence that I'd spend thinking about.
@PNW Exactly. It consistently feels like there are two people in my head. One that thinks I'm a piece of shit that everyone is secretly laughing at and a second one that thinks I'm pretty cool. They fight every day and one of them wins.
@@olivermarkus2518 I have that too, but the second one doesn't think I'm cool, they like try to make me feel pity for myself and I hate it.
I have started acting like I am not self aware. It is actually helping me.
How?
@@eldestaroma fake it till you make it
That's something you can just decide???
@@hangukhiphop yes, but it's something you have to be actively conscious of as you do it (which sounds counter-intuitive, but it does help). it's almost like meditating as you try to interact with people, actively pushing thoughts out of the way as you speak. i even still have trouble doing it sometimes, and when I do it I have to almost "prepare" my mind for it before I interact with others. it will take practice but when it works it works very well and over time you can get better at it
Yeah I’ve been trying to literally just think less and it’s seems counterintuitive for some reason, like I’m just bottling it up, but oddly it seems to be working. Of course I still confront issues I’m facing when I need to, and when I feel safe enough to, but I try not to think about them too hard otherwise it just makes me more anxious than I would’ve been.
i’ve been intensely aware of this being my problem for a whilw but i had no idea it stemmed from depression, like i thought i might have been something intensely wrong with me, and the depression was a side effect. ever since i was 10 i became so obsessed with myself i was losing friends and this worsened my mental state even further because i thought i was losing friends because im secretly a narcissist. but i act in a signficantly different way than an actual narcissist, who reflexively denies that they are incapable of anything. i absorb each incapability i discover about myself as part of my repertoire of why im a fully pathetic human being and honestly theres an infinite number of ways you can feel bad about yourself, that will go above and beyond even once you accept that you are bad at everything. im not speaking as a teletubby btw
Teletubby lore
@@EpicMiniMeatwadhaha
I hate being this self aware because I’m constantly demonizing myself for any mistake I make, which makes me hate myself more because I’m not even as hard on anyone else than I am. It does make me mature, but I still hate it.
this comment section is so insightful and comforting to read through. i pray we can all learn to let go of the things out of our control so that we may live a life filled with more joy.
Amen .
Seriously though, i have read books and alot of stuff about these thing to just try to drag myself out of it, but atleast its feel comforting here knowing there are other people fighting the same bullshit battle as i am.
Sending love, man
Amen
Sounds like a cap cannon
Thank you for this, wow. I've always struggled with extreme anxiety and largely because of my extreme self-awareness. I'm aware of literally every move I make, every mannerism, every nervous tic, everything I say, how I say it. I overanalyze everything I do, every aspect of the way I look. When I'm in the presence of other people, I literally imagine myself from an outside perspective and perceive all of my insecurities. At night, I find myself going over the events of the day and recounting all the awkward or embarrassing moments, or moments when I felt like an idiot. And if nothing in particular happened that day, I tend to travel further back and analyze past choices I've made and things like that. I honestly figured it was something everyone did. Glad to know there is a legitimate reason for this.
Sounds like me, not as severe as that but pretty much. Just tracking every single move you do. I always have to remind myself when I start thinking that way- “no one gives a shit and you shouldnt give a shit what others think. What they think doesn’t change anything.”
year later and unrelated but i've never seen anyone with an icon of the prowler or even just acknowledging the movie exists, woah
@J. Pawsadas Lmao, I've gotten this a lot recently! It's one of my favorite movies, I'm a bit of a slasher/horror fan 😄
@@donnybuoy it's a great movie! my favorite slasher is black christmas but when it comes to the look of the killer, the prowler and my bloody valentine are on top
So sorry to hear that it must be horrible ❤ I also started doing that in school to a lesser extent. I remember when the 1st covid lockdown happened I felt so relaxed cause I didn't have all these consuming thoughts anymore. Unfortunately they started again just directed towards other things lollll
I had this problem but what I found helpful is using my self awareness of my self awareness to keep it under control. Like instead of thinking “I’m stupid for not being able to change this behavior” it’d be “no you’re actually stupid for being too hanged up on not being able to change so stop overthinking it”. It’s weird I feel like I’m too aware of myself sometimes but it works.
i love when you realize you’re own flaws and then don’t do anything about them while feeling guilty about it and at the same time not being able to name any one positive trait about yourself
Man, this comment really hit home with me. I feel this exact way and idk what to do about it. I am basically helpless. The way you wrote it, are you going through or have gone through this?
Ive realised that a bit over half a decade ago, nothing really changed, honestly i only have myself to blame, been finding excuses to not do anything the whole time, possibly because in the end while i feel bad? Envious? Jealous? About others that lives a life currentky more fulfilled than mine, i dont hate who i am currently either, i am myself and thats it
@berkai3828 I had to do that too kind of, now I'm working on just taking care of some houseplants and writing some games to try and rebuild myself, I found out that I didn't know me at the start of covid but creative projects help me
I am in this comment and I do not like it one bit
reminds me of when my prof asked me my positive traits and i cant name a single one lol
Self awareness-> alienation->selfishness-->narcissism-> perfectionism->failure->I am a funny little man-> I am a goblin boy-> self reflection->self awareness-> alienation....
Loneliness sometimes
A small price to pay for goblin boy
I'm surprised this infinite loop hasn't crashed our simulation yet
Wtf this is so accurate
It seems many self aware people in the comments have, in their depth of self awareness, skipped over the narcissism part. . .
Careful with psychoactive substances. I was having a really hard time last year decided to self medicate. It helped to some degree at first. But I ended up giving myself a panic disorder and it took months to recover. 0/10 would not do again.
These drugs can helpful, but we definitely need to create safe environments and procedures for them first. Other wise random people in their bedroom run the risk of making their mental health even worse. So keep that in mind before you just jump up and do any of those substances
I remember myself and others on the internet having this conversation about being able to take drugs legally and safely in a safe and controlled environment. Basically having a certain spot with doctors and such monitoring your health while you take these feel good drugs in the right doses. Would help get a lot of people off the streets and stop drug trafficking of certain drugs and dealers to an extent and maybe even help children whose parents suffer from drug addiction. I hear about so many drugs that would usually be looked down upon because of it’s dangerous side effects but in the right doses can truly help people out with mental problems. Unfortunately they’re very addicting to your mind and it’s very difficult to overcome such addictions but maybe it can be the first step to rehab. Getting control of your intake first and then go into rehab and give it a shot. Like crawling before you walk. Most people who go into rehab drop drugs almost immediately and is probably part of the reason why a lot relapse. If they took smaller doses in a controlled and safe environment then went into rehab, it would probably make it a little easier right?
hppd gang
@@frankjaeger1711 This is a conversation people have about legalizing drugs and stuff. There was a country that actually helped addicts by giving them low doses of drugs until they were able to taper off them, in a controlled environment of course. Very, very few relapsed. Crazy thing about withdraws, and this is from actual personal experience, is that even a TINY BIT will almost completely stop the withdrawal symptoms. Thats all you really need. But its hard doing this in your own home. And it still “feels bad” buying or getting drugs to even do this. Thats why it took me so long. For about a year, i was taking tiny doses of stuff to keep the withdrawals away. I was never actually “high”.
The worst part tho is the absolute void in your brain during sobriety. I never actually got “better” I was literally forced to stop and I can’t afford rehab. So idk what even would help me cuz even tapering off can only do so much. But I probably would have done much better in a controlled environment, where I wasnt being judged, and I was given real help (I have no idea how to medically taper off drugs, it was guess work)
I was wildly dependant on DMT for about a year. Smoking literal grams of it a night, mixing it with benzos, alcohol, cough syrup, whatever.
My lifes pretty fucked now, I suffer from fairly severe hallucinations, over self awareness (as if I were tripping, small sensations feel like I'm dying).
Not to mention i had a severe dissociative disorder prior to Dimension Hopping.
Shit sucks man.
Yea drug induced anxiety is something else, avoid at all costs
2:30 to 3:40 the most accurate description of a severely anxious and depressed mind I’ve ever heard
The chat in this one was hilarious. "So ketamine's the cure👍 Got it "
Note to self: do ketamine.
100%
Ketamine is a wonderful drug
Ketamine is great
i've also seen cocaine and DMT
I remember being self aware ever since I was really little.
What an awful time it's been.
Solidarity
Mood
10 years and counting . I'm 20
Its rly bad when you cant even feel bad for yourself because you see how good you have it compared to others so your frustration builds up about not being good enough
@@SevastianNandez XD how true
this is why i both hate and envy dense people they just look so happy im like HOW?
So true
Ignorance is bliss🤦🏽♀️
How are you sad? It feels like there’s nothing to worry about too much. Nothing is so difficult that you’ll never figure it out in time so long as you care enough to be persistent, and if you fail, you aren’t losing anything. It doesn’t make sense to me, I guess that’s what makes me dense.
@@whiteknightgfry :|
@@whiteknightgfry For me, a lot of the time it's the feeling that I'll never overcome certain things that I want to overcome; sure if I just tried to be good at painting and then realized that I wasn't cut out for it but I still had other options I'd be fine, but the real trouble I run into is having things I really like and want to do, but I feel like some inherent part of me isn't designed for it. Along with the fact that doing all those types of things takes time, and I get anxious that I'll have wasted my time trying to find what I'm good at when I'm not really good at anything. Or the feeling that I can't be good at things like social skills or empathizing with people or enjoying the moment, which I wouldn't really be able to accept if I'm inherently bad at those things and could never do them.
I think it's less about being stupid or dense, and more of a frame of mind and what you grew up caring about; I never really had any social skills as a kid and I would try to get really good at things, but even if I succeeded it all felt hollow. Whereas if you had social skills, or your parents prioritized something else rather than intellectualism like mine did, then you might have a fundamentally different frame of mind that just doesn't make you think about those kinds of things.
It’s nice to see someone else say this and to relate to it. I’ve been working on acceptance and decreasing self awareness….and some days can be better than others. But ultimately it just feels like hyper awareness has been naturally ingrained into my soul and existence. I can’t escape it. It’s almost like I don’t even have a choice it’s just how my body and brain interacts with the world. Every thing I do and every social interaction there’s always this little bug in the back of my brain assessing and reflecting on the situation and how to properly interact with it, rather than accept it in the moment and be truly authentic. I even do it with my closest friends and family and even my wife. I feel and fear that I will be like this for life. I’ve come a long way but it’s just part of my existence at this point and it feels like a curse (sometimes a blessing) that I have to carry until I die. And It’s sad to say but I’ve resorted to substance abuse at times and that substance being a natural herb called kratom that has opiate like effects. I genuinely take it as a medicine to help numb or calm my mind. But I’m still relying on a substance just to feel mildly ok. I’ve been prescribed various medications such as benzos and anti anxieties, anti depressants, adderall, etc. and none of them helped. There is no miracle cure and my brain overpowers them all easily. The only thing that gives me relief is unfortunately opiates. And I know the slippery slope that pathway will be. But sometimes it can get to the point where the risk is worth the relief. But I refuse to go down that road bc it just leads to death and sadness. I’m getting to the point where I’m actually considering some kind of psychedelic therapies such as clinical ibogaine therapy or ayahuasca. But I’m terrified bc I’ve done hallucinogenics many times (typically recreationally) and honestly they just made me even more aware with even more to think about and the nature of existence and reality. So I worry this may be the case with psychedelic therapies. I guess my point is that it feels utterly incurable and so intensely strong that there’s nothing I can do but just learn to live with it. But It will be a long, hard life of suffering and I guess that’s just something I have to face and live with. If any of you out there are like me, just know that I feel deeply for you and I’m sorry you have to go through this. You’re not alone and fighting the unending battle of hyper awareness makes you a goddamn warrior. Many don’t understand how hard we have to fight each and every day. Just keep going and perhaps we will make amends with ourselves one day whether it be in this life or the next. Love y’all and have a beautifully aware day.
I always start crying whenever I (re-)realize I'm too self-aware of everything affecting my mental health in relation to myself and my actions/thoughts.
Meanwhile, a bunch of us are self-aware of being this self-aware and I'm just stuck here in this destructive never-ending cycle and hating myself along with everyone else sharing this problem.
I'm literally crying right now over this
So did you get any help
self compassion is as important as self awareness.
Watching a video on RUclips that was originally streamed on Twitch where he talks about an image from Reddit that was originally taken from Twitter
🤯
talk about inception
"xQc has no default mode network"
Twitch chat never ceases to amaze me.
Boy, am I glad I came across your channel today. I am 67 & have been trying to figure myself out intensely over the past decade. You have already opened my eyes to a few things. Thank you!❤
So you're telling me dissociating helps my depression? Man, I'm so good at multitasking, I can do both. /j
It's like people commonly say get a hobby, do things you have interest in etc just so we would get busy with ourself and not to have time to think too excessively on any things
@@MidoriGa95 Being a writer is a great job for an excessive thinker, then.
My big "green flag" when i saw a new therapist after having to switch over and over was when the therapist noted I was "very aware" in a concerned tone
Other therapists have said things like "well you're very observant/intelligent" and didn't get a problem with that
But, absolutely, you can get very overwhelmed, for anything, very easily
What I hear over and over, most therapists aren't helpful.
Yeah. I’ve heard this many times
@@gorkyd7912 My experience is it's helpful in small bursts. I wish I could find a therapist that I could see once a month or so. Meeting more often (like every single therapists I've seen seems to 'require') just results in rehashing things I've been traumatized or stressed about in the distant or recent past.
Yeah my therapist doesn't seem to be concerned over my self awareness. It took my own self awareness to realize that my self awareness is destructive...But not sure where to go from there. 😅 Was hoping this video would have more of an answer. It's been so hard for me to try find new a therapist unfortunately.
@@Hawk_Leigh OK! I know this is not the best thing to take advice from strangers on the internet or wtvr but tese are some very general things to help yourself
~When my therapist saw I nodded to everything she said deppression could lead to(procrastination, bad responses to other people, demotivation, loss of enjoyment) she asked me "what things can you do about it?" I responded what I knew or had been told before "try new things, rest when I know I'm bored, try to not focus on intrusive thoughts[...]" she then asked me a few sessions later "It seems you're not _advancing_ , you seem to be stuck" and then i ranted about I know what's wrong with me and I know I should do this and that... She asked me *"Have you tried doing those things"*
~It hit me that I procrastinated on helping myself, but I was too depressed to do those things, like , it's my fate or wtvr
>try asking people around you if they see those *bad habits* on you, you're probably masking
>If you suffer from being *too* self aware you're probably not letting others help you
>maybe you're stuck emotionally, to believe you deserve the help
>try to archive what you do on a daily basis, like, a list of what you did or journal. whatever you prefer, this is to *know* what you did and not forget it
~These are all things I got my therapist or from my own observation. You have to know I not saying these things in a judgemental tone, I fail to do this things myself ( " = ,=)
HOPE THIS HELPS ! \(^O^)/
I am extremely self aware and it makes it hard to feel through my emotions because I start feeling something and immediately start talking myself down and I never really allow myself to work through my emotions at all. It is really hard and exhausting to kind of fight with yourself
Hits home 😭
Yeah, I get angry or sad and I always tell myself "Why are you angry? Why are you sad? You shouldn't be, you have family, a job, a home, that some people dream of having. Fucking idiot, get out of self pity." And then I have another dialogue with myself about reasons I'm angry or sad about, trying to give love to myself but ultimately ends up victimizing myself and I get angry at the fact I'm trying to come up with excuses for my life when I know I can stop thinking about this and I can be productive. And then I get angry at the fact I can't stop thinking and be more productive and start talking more self-hate talk, bounce that off with self-pity so on and so forth and gosh it never ends...
how did you describe my feeling so perfectly?🙂
@@afff337 it’s a lot to handle. I’m glad someone gets it ❤️
I wanna give ya'll a hug, but the best I can do are reminders.
Sometimes you can't help belittling yourself, and that's okay. You can belittle yourselves as much as you want, but you're never going to be a lesser person or being. Ya'll are valid just the way you are. Not perfect, but still perfect nonetheless.
You can work through the negativity, but don't force yourself to smile internally when you really can't. We can't be happy or positive all the time but that doesn't make us a lesser being/person.
I'm also here to remind you all that it's fine to constantly have excuses at hand. It's okay for you not to do anything about these questions and have no answers to them. It's okay to feel stuck on one place and not being able to move forward. It's like that sometimes, and it's okay to feel bad about yourself and these things. It's a human experience after all.
You don't need to sort up every single messy tornado in your head right now. It's sometimes alright to just let them spin and go through what you need to go through or think about. You could clean it up when the time comes. Take your time to sort this out, no one's waiting for you but yourself.
Personally, feeling through all of your emotions, and remembering what you were self aware about along with taking action is the hard bit of self awareness. Like I can do this or should do that but you don't, or you end up in a spiral that doesn't benifit you.
Personally speaking, I'd recommend getting a pen and paper whenever you spiral down these sorts of questions, or even the negative things you say about yourself and ask why. You can reflect on them further and become more likely to do something about it/feel less bad the next time you think about it. It stresses me out less whenever I remember "oh yeah I had the same mental crisis about my family a week ago" and instead of asking the same questions and reanswering the same things, I can jolt down the new questions that could answer other questions/have new related answers.
I also recommend shadow work prompts so you can have an controlled existential crisis for you to jolt thoughts down with. It's odd, but it works apparently. It becomes more educational than worrisome that way.
A fascinating treatment for this that I personally went through and that works extremely well is to self reflect on your own self reflection. It's very difficult, but the over-self-awareness can actually be weaponized against itself and dwindled down over time as it comes under control.
I like to think of depression and anxiety as thought diseases. The problem that arises is that you spend an obscene amount of time thinking about things that feels logical to you because they’re your thoughts…but the moment you say them out loud to someone else, you realize that it isn’t.
Take this sample of thought:
“I have to go to class but I’m tired. I don’t want to go. Screw this, I’m going back to sleep”
“Look at you. You skipped class because you’re tired. You’re a failure, you miserable pile of trash.”
“I just couldn’t do it today. I don’t feel well.”
“You never feel well. You’re a piece of garbage. You’re a failure. A waste of space. The world would be better off without you.”
“Stop it. This isn’t me thinking this, it’s just depression.”
“No, this is how you really feel. You don’t deserve to be alive. Everyone you know is worse off for knowing you. You cause suffering to everyone around you. You owe it to everyone to give up so they can finally get over how much pain you’ve caused them.”
“I know.”
It’s not so much that this is a logical train of thought, it’s that you’re basically in an abusive relationship with yourself. In the same way you wouldn’t tell someone in an abusive relationship that their partner is right, no therapist would tell you that your depressed thoughts are right. You’ve just been beaten into submission and think that it’s right. Remember that: logic and feeling are very different.
Yo you stabbed me with that example-
"Logic and feeling are very different" is a sentence I basically said a billion times before. Feels to me like people using their "gut feeling" as their moral compass without even realizing how much of it is irrational or based on their own history. I wish more people would use their logic, but obviously with constraints.
This is why it's a viable strategy to imagine someone else in that same situation and your judgement of them. It's called self-compassion.
I’m glad I’m not the only one who battles with this. We are our own best friend and biggest enemy.
Im literally on youtube instead of in class because this exact train of thought is happening to me rn lmao.
I’m this way as well. Everyone is like “at least you are aware of what you need to work on” but that’s the issue, I don’t know how to get there. Being aware of a problem is good but figuring out how to fix/work on it is a different issue. It’s so exhausting too cause I’ll spend my whole time trying to figure out and rationalize everything that I don’t know how to get to where I want to be. Even then not everything can be fixed so all you can do is accept that it’s there. I’m writing this realizing I’m doing the exact same thing that I’m talking about 😭 sometimes we l just need a little bit of guidance instead of doing it all by ourselves.
holy shit the way my brain be reading this and comprehending this and being able to understnad it-
HA same-
Yeah I honestly think I would be better at fixing my problems if I wasn't as self aware about them. It's weird. Like, I feel as though I would just be more normal as a whole.
Exactly! The problem is not the "what", the problem is the "how"
@@irecordwithaphone1856 Totally agree with this!! Especially with the issue of compounding/multiple problems. I feel like if I wasn’t so aware of every single problem I need to face at once, I would actually be able to focus/or improve on a couple things at a time rather than feeling the pressure of all the issues at once. The awareness actually pushes me to inaction sometimes because it feels like so much work to be done LMAO.
@@randomfandom3343 Exactly how I feel
This, coupled with a higher expectation for myself due to constant reassurance of my intelligence makes it painful to reflect on my own failures.
Constantly aware of how flawed I am and to what extent and being unable to find the solution or sustain a solution.
Same. This sometimes happens to me too. At this point I don't find it surprising that many people experience these types of issues anymore. Hope you find a way (don't you dare take it hard on yourself {ಠʖಠ}) for this problem. Heart goes out for you stranger
My mum "you were so much smarter than me I thought you could raise yourself"
Me making spaghetti from a can "k"
My ultra-self awareness is the biggest contributor to my depression. What you were saying about the Psilocybin is very interesting, but i have always felt my use of psychedelics in my younger years was a major contributor to me being so self-aware to begin with
Overactive self-awareness has definitely fucked my brain up but it also feels enlightening when it's working in my favour
one of the best comments on here.. my hyper self awareness and constant overthinking has mostly caused me grief but sometimes it gives me the edge in social situations because i can read the room extremely easily and reliably. you're right, in those moments i feel like the smartest mf on the planet
yeah but i also could be the top student if i didn’t have this stupid fucking thing that i have to fight every day aaaaah
@@santasangre996 sounds like you have some kinda superpower
@@santasangre996Same here
Yess
"can I go harvard andy for a second?"
"yeah, that's the point"
LOL
I felt quite alone in feeling this way, kind of a relief to know there are others. I reflect so much that I rarely participate.
Yeah, it's ruined all my life since around late primary school and my mental health is only getting worse...
@@TrancemasterOnyx hope you're much better now, truly. whether or not, ill be crossing fingers, occasionally!
@@femboiuwu Thanks! It's something I had to work on and I'm thankfully in a much better place mentally, especielly since beginning taking meds for my dysthymia 😌
Hey ❤ lit I can't explain how alone I feel in this I'm so ashamed of myself, feeling so broken like its abnormal for a human being to be going through this. Everyday I keep trying to find solutions to get me out of the thought loops but every "solution" just gets meshed in with the thought loops - becoming another thing that I obsessively think about with no resolution. ❤
@@CCCcustomer Hope it gets better for you soon.. stay strong! You're not alone C: