Absolutely agree. At 81, I have been retired for a while, but when I worked, I always wore a suit or a blazer. I also always wore braces (buttons, never clips), usually a vest and a pocket watch on a chain. I had a reputation as a sharp dresser, and I had the self-confidence that goes with it. And when I wore a tuxedo, the good feeling was even greater. So, nowadays, I dress up to some degree or other, even to go shopping. Church is coat and tie. Shoes and boots are ALL mirror-shined. Thanks, Ash. another great video.
It's a big old boost to the self esteem when your well turned out and ladies 20+ years younger start checking you you out. Even though I'm happily married it's a huge ego boost.
Agreed Ash, I’m an airline pilot and I certainly notice the effect of my uniform when I’m working. Everyone from the taxi driver taking me to work to the hotel staff at the end of the day give me respect.
Dressing like a gentleman is part of my daily ritual, and it definitely boosts my self-esteem to be treated with respect and even deference when I am out shopping or even just meeting friends for coffee and conversation. Almost every day, somebody will comment on my attire, or on the cologne I am wearing, or even on my bearing when I walk down the street, and I can tell you, Ash, that being noticed and complimented is much to be preferred to being ignored or treated with indifference. The vast majority of men, apparently, have no idea how they are being judged daily based on the "first impression" that relates directly to how they choose to attire themselves.
Excellent. It's good to focus on real world benefits of dressing well both on the self and one's surroundings. I was in a sports jacket and tie yesterday and a very young man walking with his gf reached out to comment on how much he liked my outfit. It's a reminder that there is a yearning by young men for both the touchstones and symbols of manly empowerment, dignity and gravitas.
I do admire your efforts to educate the modern man in dressing appropriately Ash. I also feel that you're probably preaching to the converted such as myself. I do hope that some men out there are inspired by your pep talks and common sense. Dressing well is more of a state of mind I feel, as alas, slovenly dressed men is also down to their psychology. I recall during particular difficult times in my own life I let standards slip as is evidenced in some of my family photos. However, I managed to bounce back from these occasions and now possess a very respectable wardrobe. Thank you Ash for impressing on men the importance of self care and self esteem. ❤
Here is another challenge though, going to a formal dress event where you know everybody will be making an effort but still standing out from the crowd. I went to a House of Lords reception some while ago and I wore full highland rig with a kilt and sporran. Yes I did wear a clan tartan I am entitled to fortiter et recte.
Can't wait for part 2. Your uniform story and the ones in the comments are powerful. I also get INSANELY better treatment when I have a blazer on. Its crazy. I no longer question it and say its shallow. i just do what works.
I turn 42 this year and have had a career in tech for more than a decade. This year, I made the decision to stop dressing like a tech bro and start ironing my own shirts and trousers every morning (learned from your legendary ironing videos of courser). Boy am I enjoying this new habit. The ironing routine is like a meditation session in the morning to me now while the response I get from the people around me is exactly like you said. Thank you for your inspiring videos!
It is absolutely true, people do treat you differently. I’ve always worn a suit to work, or sports jacket and tie. I remember when I was training for my current job, shadowing a very experienced colleague, clients would always assume I was senior and would speak to me rather than him, simply because I was smartly dressed and he was casual.
Dressing well reminds me that I lend dignity to my interactions while I go about my business, than someone wearing what is comfortable and cheap. It shows I respect the other person and myself.
What you say is very true im an ordained minister and when i go to church every sunday well dressed with my suits and i stop by the gas station you can very easily see the diffrence i the way people treat you great video keep up the good work
Clearly universal and timeless. John T. Molloy wrote a book Dress for Success in the 70s in the US, that suggested many of the points you made. What I found fascinating was that people are conditioned to act proper around well-dressed people. Namely, they can help it.
In the states, my job required a uniform, sadly. But when out, performing music, announcing for sports, church, etc., I always was dressed proper. It feels so good to look your best, or at least as best as you're able. But I moved to The Philippines 10 yrs ago, and with this heat, it's almost an impossibility to dress proper. The only time I was able to, was twice going back to the states for a visit. Other than that, it's SHORTS, 99.99% of the time.😕😤
Their are ways to dress well in the heat. I, for example wear white and tan, casual fit linen pants and casual fit linen shirts whenever on holiday. Narrow lapel, 2 button, cotton/linen blazers which are only half lined work well in the evenings and ofcourse a nice fragrance, watch and pair of sunglasses help keep up the standards. Footwear is a bit more difficult really but lots of videos are around with advice about dressing well in summer which may possess a note worthy tip or two hopefully for you my friend
Dressing for self esteem is what brought me upon this sartorial path in the first place and it has really helped me out from feeling very low about myself. I changed the way I dressed, the way I walked and the way I spoke. Faking it till I made it was my approach confidence. I decided it was time to make a big enough decision to pull me out from the gutter. I decided that Harvey Specter from Suits (currently on Netflix[Exellent series imo] ) had elements I felt were missing from my life. I feel a lot happier, I'm citernly more confident and I am received far better from colleagues, friends and strangers for the changes I have made. Putting the effort in with dress, etiquette and communication is not only about respect towards others, it's also about self respect. Dressing well may also have you lean in towards fitness and trying to make opportunities for yourself, help with discipline and with the right intentions made you a better man. Be awesome, be you. P. S, the only self help and style channels that are genuine are this one, gentz and the gentlemens gazette
I will always love my tailored suits and sports coats, but lately I’ve been feeling a great affinity for my safari jacket. Whether it says ‘gentleman adventurer’ or ‘mid-life crisis’ is not for me to say, but I feel immensely confident in it regardless.
Safari jacket is fine in summer, I've been thinking about getting one for some time, I don't think it's midlife crisis-y... but then I just turned 40... Though I'm more on the lookout for a Teba jacket... which is essentially the same but fuelled by more vanity.😇 Best regards Raoul G. Kunz
Hello Ash, where is the Bowler? I love this video because here in the Philippines it makes a huge difference when you wear a smart shirt and crisp trousers. The security guards come to attention and people feel honoured that you dressed well for them. As a part-time lecturer you have to command the respect of the students and dressing well is key to this.
Ash, as always, fabulous content and so true. I recall you mentioning the clothing study from before and thought then as now, that I will remind one of my sons. 2 sons are uniformed Services (Police/Fire) and always err on the smarter side of dress despite their younger age. One (likely in some form of “rebellion” against his old man’s attire ) always opts for the bottom end of casual (age plays a part too, of course). BUT, when ‘forced’ into Black Tie for formal Dinner Nights, he always comments on how many young ladies wish to speak to him…. I think the proverbial case can be rested!
I noticed this when working in Thailand.I would go out in a mohair jacket, shirt, shoes and the service was amazing,alaways got into even the most exclusive bars..Same thing in Singapore and KL.
@dandiehm8414 My father always said a gentleman can never be overdressed. You can always dress down slightly if necessary-remove your tie for example. Better to be looking at it, rather than for it.
Good article about a very young man called Charlie Elphinstone who wears a bowler hat and suits, he loves antiques which helps him with ear pain on BBC Scotland news.
This is very accurate. I have very poor self esteem. I am aware that a lot of people think I dress well because I perceive myself as better than them. What they don’t realize is that I dress well because I think I’m less than them. I’m attempting to raise myself to the level of normal people. And if a hair is out of place or there’s a piece of lint on my outfit, the façade is all ruined. I drive myself crazy getting everything to what I believe is good enough to face the world. It’s a struggle.
"The suit is a modern gentleman's armour [...]" -Harry Hart Not joking here, even though it's from a comedy. This statement is a true one that has worked for me for decades while I reconstituted myself from the various, rather massive, sticks and stones cosmic entropy has chosen to throw at me. Best regards Raoul G. Kunz
I returned to wearing suits since I turned 50. Since then my success at work went straight up. I made it a habit to buy a new fitted suit after every promotion to celebrate and i just LOVE showing up for work!
Agree totally I was also in the police and people always look at you and turn to you knowing or hoping you will know what to do. Dressing well also us recognised as you said by store staff. I was in London many years ago dressed in shining brogues, linen trousers, shirt and Panama hat. It was rather hot so no jacket and front of house staff gave me a nod or touchd their hats as they caught my eye.
Hi Ash- totally agree with you. One question - did you have the shoulder width of the coat extended past your natural shoulder line? I was thinking of slightly extending the width of the shoulder line for my next suit but I wonder that actually works or not. What was your conclusion yourself looking at the line of your coat?
Certainly true. I'm still young enough to remember being an indifferently dressed youth, even early as a student (though, by wired neurological ...stuff that happened in my NDE it *feels* like someone else's life I have perfect memories of...🙃) - but that was already in the process of turning my "reflected perception of self" around to the current state - and thinking of the whole "dressing well" thing as inconsequential. However in the past ~two decades I've not only accumulated something around 40 hats and a lot of "proper menswear" but I've also made the distinct experience that the perception of me has decidedly turned towards being almost exclusively positive - and I don't think that this only accidentally correlates with me starting to dress in a "classic", vaguely 1920s-1950s inspired way and choosing appropriate perfumes to go with this every day and befitting every occasion. Yes that initially costs some energy and effort, but things start pretty soon to get ingrained to the degree that much is "automatic" and I'm "free" to choose small modifications or choose experimental ways to modify the look e.g. wearing a fairly 19th century-ish Inverness Coat in place of my customary early-mid 20th century overcoats and greatcoats. Worked. So it's in the option range. Getting a Trilby as a new hat. Doesn't look good on me (unlike on Mr. Jones here) so I sold it again. And this all works because I'm working from the base of acquired confidence - Heck! When I feel really down I tend to pick an *extra* dapper outfit even when just commuting to work (train commuter here, so it is public) because I've come to the conclusion that Harry Hart is right, that "The suit is a modern gentleman's [psychological] armour, [...]" indeed. Best regards Raoul G. Kunz Addendum: Maybe I'm slow in noticing this, but is this the Edelweiß boutonnière from Mr. Schneider's Fort Belvedere line?
I always get asked if I am the owner every time someone comes in. As I learned in the military there is a reason for the uniform. Bottom line please put yourself together
I really do not think a car contributes to a gentleman's self esteem or sense of style - in fact, they often demonstrate a lack of those qualities in my experience. Take the shy man who drives a fancy sports car as he believes it will inflate his sense of accomplishment and value - in most cases, it merely demonstrates his lack of self esteem and his willingness to enter into needless debt.
Evening Ash, I know how people treat me when I dress well, It's obvious . In particular, in social and retail environments.. Was that BOS police station?
when you are well dress well cops will not iven look at you ,, if just standing in streets at night having a smoke ,, do the same wearing a houdy and sneakers ,, they may observe you or ask what are you doung ther , in some ocasion also ask for your documents ,
Not sure if you have done this video, but would like one based on how you came to build a RUclips channel around this idea. You have really great style. I could see you inhabiting a James Bond movie. Just over there at the gambling table, surrounded by lovely ladies. Winning, while telling the most fascinating story of your great aunt, who shall be nameless, alerting authorities as to why a certain someone was actually the perpetrator. That they must let Mr. Nobody from detention go, all the while correcting my erroneous grammar. 😊
Hello Ash, pardon my ignorance but do you happen to be Welsh? And if so would it be possible to have an episode in Welsh with English subtitles? Trying to learn Welsh and it would be a treat to be able to listen to Welsh about a subject I’m passionate about. Kind regards, Philip J Duke.
nice crombie. get up, dress up, show up. how do you deal with people constantly staring at you??? it truly takes the jam out of my doughnut, and it gets hard to remain polite when people are incredibly rude. it's totally fine to look or glace at someone however, staring is completely different and rude.
Absolutely agree. At 81, I have been retired for a while, but when I worked, I always wore a suit or a blazer. I also always wore braces (buttons, never clips), usually a vest and a pocket watch on a chain. I had a reputation as a sharp dresser, and I had the self-confidence that goes with it.
And when I wore a tuxedo, the good feeling was even greater.
So, nowadays, I dress up to some degree or other, even to go shopping. Church is coat and tie. Shoes and boots are ALL mirror-shined.
Thanks, Ash. another great video.
It's a big old boost to the self esteem when your well turned out and ladies 20+ years younger start checking you you out. Even though I'm happily married it's a huge ego boost.
Looking very dapper My friend. A very 1960s vibe. I agree with your thoughts. Cheers Ron
Agreed Ash, I’m an airline pilot and I certainly notice the effect of my uniform when I’m working. Everyone from the taxi driver taking me to work to the hotel staff at the end of the day give me respect.
Well said Ash may I say that you're Attire is magnificent Sir
Dressing like a gentleman is part of my daily ritual, and it definitely boosts my self-esteem to be treated with respect and even deference when I am out shopping or even just meeting friends for coffee and conversation. Almost every day, somebody will comment on my attire, or on the cologne I am wearing, or even on my bearing when I walk down the street, and I can tell you, Ash, that being noticed and complimented is much to be preferred to being ignored or treated with indifference.
The vast majority of men, apparently, have no idea how they are being judged daily based on the "first impression" that relates directly to how they choose to attire themselves.
Absolutely true. How you dress does indeed impact how you feel and carry yourself . Commands respect and attention from others . So true, Ash. 9:18
Excellent. It's good to focus on real world benefits of dressing well both on the self and one's surroundings. I was in a sports jacket and tie yesterday and a very young man walking with his gf reached out to comment on how much he liked my outfit. It's a reminder that there is a yearning by young men for both the touchstones and symbols of manly empowerment, dignity and gravitas.
I do admire your efforts to educate the modern man in dressing appropriately Ash. I also feel that you're probably preaching to the converted such as myself.
I do hope that some men out there are inspired by your pep talks and common sense. Dressing well is more of a state of mind I feel, as alas, slovenly dressed men is also down to their psychology.
I recall during particular difficult times in my own life I let standards slip as is evidenced in some of my family photos. However, I managed to bounce back from these occasions and now possess a very respectable wardrobe. Thank you Ash for impressing on men the importance of self care and self esteem. ❤
Here is another challenge though, going to a formal dress event where you know everybody will be making an effort but still standing out from the crowd. I went to a House of Lords reception some while ago and I wore full highland rig with a kilt and sporran. Yes I did wear a clan tartan I am entitled to fortiter et recte.
Can't wait for part 2. Your uniform story and the ones in the comments are powerful. I also get INSANELY better treatment when I have a blazer on. Its crazy. I no longer question it and say its shallow. i just do what works.
I turn 42 this year and have had a career in tech for more than a decade. This year, I made the decision to stop dressing like a tech bro and start ironing my own shirts and trousers every morning (learned from your legendary ironing videos of courser). Boy am I enjoying this new habit. The ironing routine is like a meditation session in the morning to me now while the response I get from the people around me is exactly like you said. Thank you for your inspiring videos!
It is absolutely true, people do treat you differently. I’ve always worn a suit to work, or sports jacket and tie. I remember when I was training for my current job, shadowing a very experienced colleague, clients would always assume I was senior and would speak to me rather than him, simply because I was smartly dressed and he was casual.
Dressing well reminds me that I lend dignity to my interactions while I go about my business, than someone wearing what is comfortable and cheap. It shows I respect the other person and myself.
What you say is very true im an ordained minister and when i go to church every sunday well dressed with my suits and i stop by the gas station you can very easily see the diffrence i the way people treat you great video keep up the good work
Clearly universal and timeless. John T. Molloy wrote a book Dress for Success in the 70s in the US, that suggested many of the points you made. What I found fascinating was that people are conditioned to act proper around well-dressed people. Namely, they can help it.
In the states, my job required a uniform, sadly. But when out, performing music, announcing for sports, church, etc., I always was dressed proper. It feels so good to look your best, or at least as best as you're able. But I moved to The Philippines 10 yrs ago, and with this heat, it's almost an impossibility to dress proper. The only time I was able to, was twice going back to the states for a visit. Other than that, it's SHORTS, 99.99% of the time.😕😤
Their are ways to dress well in the heat. I, for example wear white and tan, casual fit linen pants and casual fit linen shirts whenever on holiday. Narrow lapel, 2 button, cotton/linen blazers which are only half lined work well in the evenings and ofcourse a nice fragrance, watch and pair of sunglasses help keep up the standards. Footwear is a bit more difficult really but lots of videos are around with advice about dressing well in summer which may possess a note worthy tip or two hopefully for you my friend
I live in Florida, a company called Cubavera makes very nice clothing for hot weather. Check them out on line.
Dressing for self esteem is what brought me upon this sartorial path in the first place and it has really helped me out from feeling very low about myself. I changed the way I dressed, the way I walked and the way I spoke. Faking it till I made it was my approach confidence. I decided it was time to make a big enough decision to pull me out from the gutter. I decided that Harvey Specter from Suits (currently on Netflix[Exellent series imo] ) had elements I felt were missing from my life. I feel a lot happier, I'm citernly more confident and I am received far better from colleagues, friends and strangers for the changes I have made. Putting the effort in with dress, etiquette and communication is not only about respect towards others, it's also about self respect. Dressing well may also have you lean in towards fitness and trying to make opportunities for yourself, help with discipline and with the right intentions made you a better man. Be awesome, be you.
P. S, the only self help and style channels that are genuine are this one, gentz and the gentlemens gazette
I will always love my tailored suits and sports coats, but lately I’ve been feeling a great affinity for my safari jacket. Whether it says ‘gentleman adventurer’ or ‘mid-life crisis’ is not for me to say, but I feel immensely confident in it regardless.
Safari jacket is fine in summer, I've been thinking about getting one for some time, I don't think it's midlife crisis-y... but then I just turned 40...
Though I'm more on the lookout for a Teba jacket... which is essentially the same but fuelled by more vanity.😇
Best regards
Raoul G. Kunz
Hello Ash, where is the Bowler? I love this video because here in the Philippines it makes a huge difference when you wear a smart shirt and crisp trousers. The security guards come to attention and people feel honoured that you dressed well for them. As a part-time lecturer you have to command the respect of the students and dressing well is key to this.
Bowler is coming
I like the overcoat, Ash. It fits like a glove. The gloves, too!
nice dress gloves, sharp! also a strong accessory for making visual points
Like the old saying "Dress for Success."
Ash, as always, fabulous content and so true. I recall you mentioning the clothing study from before and thought then as now, that I will remind one of my sons. 2 sons are uniformed Services (Police/Fire) and always err on the smarter side of dress despite their younger age. One (likely in some form of “rebellion” against his old man’s attire ) always opts for the bottom end of casual (age plays a part too, of course). BUT, when ‘forced’ into Black Tie for formal Dinner Nights, he always comments on how many young ladies wish to speak to him…. I think the proverbial case can be rested!
I noticed this when working in Thailand.I would go out in a mohair jacket, shirt, shoes and the service was amazing,alaways got into even the most exclusive bars..Same thing in Singapore and KL.
Can't argue with anything you said Ash. Thank you
Appreciate this! Starting a new job 12/02/24. USA here. Over dressing would be perceived much better than casualty.
Much better to be overdressed than underdressed - especially in a work environment.
@dandiehm8414 My father always said a gentleman can never be overdressed. You can always dress down slightly if necessary-remove your tie for example. Better to be looking at it, rather than for it.
@@SuperBlaidd Your father was correct and sounds like a wise man.
@@dandiehm8414 indeed, I believe he was. Thank you.
Good article about a very young man called Charlie Elphinstone who wears a bowler hat and suits, he loves antiques which helps him with ear pain on BBC Scotland news.
This is very accurate. I have very poor self esteem. I am aware that a lot of people think I dress well because I perceive myself as better than them. What they don’t realize is that I dress well because I think I’m less than them. I’m attempting to raise myself to the level of normal people. And if a hair is out of place or there’s a piece of lint on my outfit, the façade is all ruined. I drive myself crazy getting everything to what I believe is good enough to face the world. It’s a struggle.
I can relate completely. Try to see the masculine beauty in imperfection and will help keep the ship afloat
"The suit is a modern gentleman's armour [...]"
-Harry Hart
Not joking here, even though it's from a comedy. This statement is a true one that has worked for me for decades while I reconstituted myself from the various, rather massive, sticks and stones cosmic entropy has chosen to throw at me.
Best regards
Raoul G. Kunz
@@Ali_SaracenI am nothing if not imperfect.
@terrydrums true of us all
Very educated and informative video sir.thank you sir
Keep up the good work
Absolutely correct.
I returned to wearing suits since I turned 50. Since then my success at work went straight up. I made it a habit to buy a new fitted suit after every promotion to celebrate and i just LOVE showing up for work!
Agree totally I was also in the police and people always look at you and turn to you knowing or hoping you will know what to do.
Dressing well also us recognised as you said by store staff. I was in London many years ago dressed in shining brogues, linen trousers, shirt and Panama hat. It was rather hot so no jacket and front of house staff gave me a nod or touchd their hats as they caught my eye.
Hi Ash- totally agree with you. One question - did you have the shoulder width of the coat extended past your natural shoulder line? I was thinking of slightly extending the width of the shoulder line for my next suit but I wonder that actually works or not. What was your conclusion yourself looking at the line of your coat?
Man I love the intro music 👍😎👍
Very useful information Sir...
Definitely need to see part two, as part one really didn't address HOW to dress to boost your self esteem (as the videos title promised).
That is coming in part 2 on Thursday
@@TheChapsGuide Looking forward to it - but I probably won't see it until Friday - we are a little busy in the USA on Thursday. 🦃
Looking sharp sir!
Certainly true. I'm still young enough to remember being an indifferently dressed youth, even early as a student (though, by wired neurological ...stuff that happened in my NDE it *feels* like someone else's life I have perfect memories of...🙃) - but that was already in the process of turning my "reflected perception of self" around to the current state - and thinking of the whole "dressing well" thing as inconsequential.
However in the past ~two decades I've not only accumulated something around 40 hats and a lot of "proper menswear" but I've also made the distinct experience that the perception of me has decidedly turned towards being almost exclusively positive - and I don't think that this only accidentally correlates with me starting to dress in a "classic", vaguely 1920s-1950s inspired way and choosing appropriate perfumes to go with this every day and befitting every occasion.
Yes that initially costs some energy and effort, but things start pretty soon to get ingrained to the degree that much is "automatic" and I'm "free" to choose small modifications or choose experimental ways to modify the look e.g. wearing a fairly 19th century-ish Inverness Coat in place of my customary early-mid 20th century overcoats and greatcoats.
Worked. So it's in the option range.
Getting a Trilby as a new hat. Doesn't look good on me (unlike on Mr. Jones here) so I sold it again.
And this all works because I'm working from the base of acquired confidence - Heck! When I feel really down I tend to pick an *extra* dapper outfit even when just commuting to work (train commuter here, so it is public) because I've come to the conclusion that Harry Hart is right, that "The suit is a modern gentleman's [psychological] armour, [...]" indeed.
Best regards
Raoul G. Kunz
Addendum: Maybe I'm slow in noticing this, but is this the Edelweiß boutonnière from Mr. Schneider's Fort Belvedere line?
Yes it is!
Thanks Ash!
I always get asked if I am the owner every time someone comes in. As I learned in the military there is a reason for the uniform. Bottom line please put yourself together
Fanstatic video ash what is your opinion on choice of cars from a self esteem perspective:)
I really do not think a car contributes to a gentleman's self esteem or sense of style - in fact, they often demonstrate a lack of those qualities in my experience. Take the shy man who drives a fancy sports car as he believes it will inflate his sense of accomplishment and value - in most cases, it merely demonstrates his lack of self esteem and his willingness to enter into needless debt.
@TheChapsGuide thanks for the reply you are very correct I know a few people that if you took the car away they would be lost.....
❤
Waist coats Ash? Talk to us 😁
Evening Ash, I know how people treat me when I dress well, It's obvious . In particular, in social and retail environments.. Was that BOS police station?
Well spotted.
Hello Ash, is your bowler hat still in use?
Oh yes. You will see it in a video later this week as I recall.
when you are well dress well cops will not iven look at you ,, if just standing in streets at night having a smoke ,, do the same wearing a houdy and sneakers ,, they may observe you or ask what are you doung ther , in some ocasion also ask for your documents ,
Not sure if you have done this video, but would like one based on how you came to build a RUclips channel around this idea. You have really great style. I could see you inhabiting a James Bond movie. Just over there at the gambling table, surrounded by lovely ladies. Winning, while telling the most fascinating story of your great aunt, who shall be nameless, alerting authorities as to why a certain someone was actually the perpetrator. That they must let Mr. Nobody from detention go, all the while correcting my erroneous grammar. 😊
WWMBD? What would Mr Bean do?
First 🎉
Second (:
Hello Ash, pardon my ignorance but do you happen to be Welsh? And if so would it be possible to have an episode in Welsh with English subtitles?
Trying to learn Welsh and it would be a treat to be able to listen to Welsh about a subject I’m passionate about.
Kind regards,
Philip J Duke.
I do not speak Welsh sir. Not a skill I possess.
nice crombie.
get up, dress up, show up.
how do you deal with people constantly staring at you???
it truly takes the jam out of my doughnut, and it gets hard to remain polite when people are incredibly rude.
it's totally fine to look or glace at someone however, staring is completely different and rude.