Esther Perel AMA - Ask me anything | UNFINISHED19
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- Опубликовано: 12 апр 2020
- TRUST IS AN ACTIVE ENGAGEMENT WITH THE UNKNOWN. Looking back at psychotherapist Esther Perel's impromptu "Ask me Anything" session from last UNFINISHED, we find much wisdom and comfort. Back then already we were thinking about how to be there for others without loosing ourselves, consider that protecting someone is not always what we think, and calling out for quality listening and device-free attention. Watch the entire video for more! -and then turn off your screen ;)
People like Esther Perel make me slightly happier to live on this planet.
Me too. She has such a kind way.
Esther can riff off such complex questions simply because her breadth snd depth of cultures and relationships are just mindblowing!!!
In the kingdom of the blind, the one-eyed person rules.
"Don't laugh." I didn't think I could love her anymore.
I just love this women's mind !!
Fascinating discussion. She hit on a couple of important things - seemingly one sign of a healthy relationship: when the person I'm involved with and I are able to reflect each other in a healthy way, rather than being detached. I've had the experience of being physically close to someone, yet they were so emotionally detached I might as well have been halfway around the world. At that level it's so much better to be alone. "To make space for another person to be with themselves in your presence". To allow them to be themself. There is a cavernous divide between the genuine caring it takes to allow someone to be themself, even in a simple friendship, as opposed to using or abusing them.
What about when you leave in order to save your own life for good reason? Really agree that the qualities of trust, loyalty, etc. are very important. How do we build real trust?
Enjoyed listening. Thanks and appreciation.
This woman is a genius! Wow, my awe for her never fades.
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Bless her patience’s with the lighting and sound people.
Not just the talk is amazing, Esther Perel is always amazing, but the questions are jaw dropping good! What an audience!
"is marriage obsolete".. "how can you say NO without hurting the other person"... Bro there were some horrific questions in there lol
Esther is magnificent
Always!!
She personifies what she preaches....humour, curiosity, energetic, intelligent, insightful and wraps it all up in a bundle of natural sensuality ...the accent and smile
Esther what a fantastic person you are, you captivate your audience, you are humble but very powerful with your knowledge .
I am glad to have found your podcasts.
I am living for the chaos she caused for the lighting and sound people. 😎😜😎😜😎
Esther the Magnificent
A modern day Goddess and Warrior!
We bow to your intelligence.
🤔🌟💘👸🦁♏
So much wisdom from her 💕
Hi your amazing Esther I love your truthfulness and direct approach I’m 67 and things I’ve learned are that people don’t tell the truth and can skew research the stuff that goes on behind closed doors such as clubs that provide lunchtime sex….for gay people who are married….it’s sad but there is an underground that should be explored thank you
Ahhh.. so glad to see this done in my country, Romania! I can see the similar accent with mine but proud how beautiful they speak English but I love their perspective of freedom, haha.. love that.. Best from Canada!
Congratulations Mrs. Perel one of your strongest testimonies about what happens in a couple therapy room and it is wonderful and amazing how you time and time again try to bring the inner out and the outer in so all of us may grow in our relationships in our expectations.
Smart woman...thank you.
I'm telling you she is Very Good
Even though my marriage is over… I am grateful for having known I share the same thoughts! Thank you
One thing that is universal is language. And if you understand english, you can understaind and hear other cultures. That's why you @Esther Perel come across all the english speaking "folk".
Love their accents!
Thanks. This opened my eyes a bit more. I appreciate this share!
U are so intelligent u are in need of a bond of conference an thank u for ur sacrifices
Sound is very poor
If you love someone you don’t need another man .. and also you don’t want to share your man who you love 🥰🥰
How ??
I think the lighting issues had to do with technicians who did not speak English so did not understand what she was asking for.
I really like talks/sessions like that and like Esther a lot. But why wasnt anything prepared beforehand technically (lights, mics) ?
I like her..❤
Like U 2
Still haven’t found what I’m looking for.
Thank you so much Esther Perel I love everything about you and your topic’s.
5:05 it seems to me that polygamy works for one men having multiple female partners (polygyny) or for on woman having multiple men partners (polyandry).
i wished the audio was louder
Back in the day, I sought out married men because I was NOT interested in marriage.
Too many young men were.
There are always Married men on the prowl. These days if I sought a relationship, I would avoid Married men, like plague!
See also: Say no to rewards and punishments," #87 and #88 on RUclips.
I could hardly hear. Sound was too low.
Ask me anything! It’s already suspicious
What does she say at 32:42? What language? Love this woman.
Why is Love never enough?
awesome work from evidencehackers911 on Instagram, he helped me spy on my fiancee phone last week, now am sure he that he was cheating so i can make the right choice before our marriage. been cheated on really sucks,you can contact him to solve you problem of infidelity…
it's the human interpretation that makes it insufficient. love itself is an abundance
idk, she seems full of confidence mainly
It'd help if the camera didn't keep cutting to the attractive young woman like it was the 1978 World Cup.
33:30
In Thai we don't have the word 'dating' rather boyfriend and girlfriend.
Yes!!! Dating doesn't exist in Portuguese.
Keep phones off the table “ counter cultural”
Polyamory...funny how anyone could be jealous, have trust issues, or be offended at being cheated on...obviously, in that whole situation, no one can be "dedicated" to anyone so it should be no surprise...in MY own OPINION...that situation breeds trust issues and jealousy, that you are not good enough for that person...
it isa recipie for disaster.
I'd have thought the same thing. However my understanding now is that even tho there are more than 2 people in the relationship it still had agreed boundaries and consent of who is involved in this relationship etc..
Polyamory is the Narcissist’s Playground.
How to find peace after you are ghosted though? It is so cruel.
Recognize that their ghosting was never about you. De-personalizing it can help you find freedom and peace.
Sara Nevius Thanks for your reply Sara!
Acceptance. That this person do ghosting, it's immature and maybe coward and that has nothing to do with you.
Like what the people below have said. the person ghosting is very immature and would rather avoid the situation and run away than be more mature and upfront/ You deserve to be with someone who has empathy and considers your feelings
This might be naive of me but you never know. Corina, if you see this, just wanted to remind you that I love you and wish you the best of luck with bootcamp.
Miss you a lot already. Take care my sweet mixed salad ❤️
I'm not Corina, but this is suuuuper adorable :)
The men do not ask for the phone in the end…
Great talk Esther! We should meet. Wish the sound was better...but ahh...Trust and the share on communication is a biggee. In Your Body is a Gift -a 6 year project- I created and published was overwhelming. I found myself introducing to girls between 12 and 18 that --...Sexual Intimacy and love go together! OMG! Hopefully, a very similar book for females 19 - 35 will happen. Yes, working with Americans...and working in America you have had a few adjustments to make. Some of my young editors from Europe (South America not so much) have a bit of a different take on sex and love. Real communication, relationship, trust, love & then sexuality... are the '5 Biggies'. Our teens and 20s are wanting something more than lame Sex Ed 101. Oh by the way...WOW!! Your talk that brought up 'INdifference' was a turning point for me!! Sooooo grateful. I am the mother of 2 grown men (just wait!) who came of age during the Clinton mess. Great story there. Blessings to you and yours.
Great session, as always. In what country was this conference held?
Romania 😍
All romanians speak English?!!!
Most of us, yes:-) it's the main foreign language learned in schools.
The guy who disclosed to the audience and everybody who is and will be watching this that his mum is seeing a married man is probably getting invited to family dos less after this. Also, Esther clarifying that it is his mother.... Not great.
does anyone know what she says at 32:42? I think she says something in French, describing why exchanging typical first dates questions are so “fucking boring”
Unbearable
perfect thank you
perfect thank you
She says basically the same thing in every lecture
Yes, she is really smart and needed and its almost like a concert or a stand-up gig or travelling production of theatre, so many recordings of almost the same, but at a different time and place.
you will appreciate the nuanced differences of each of her talk by listening more attentively. It is never about the similarity of the content but an open mind of grasping new concepts for yourselves. Good luck.
She repeats herself over and over again in all her presentation. She does copy and paste
This woman has a background in art, not therapy. Maybe ask her how long she was actually practicing therapy - it's not 35 years. She waffles on with so much irrelevant information, and what is relevant is obvious to all of us - none of this is groundbreaking. Just because the dating landscape has changed, doesn't mean it's for the better. We are living in a world of narcissism right now, and we don't need more compromising of our morals and ethics when it comes to intimate relationships. I argue that she promotes and even encourages polygamy in relationships as well, and the way in which it is pushed in her books is nothing short of negligent. Lastly, psychotherapy is not backed by science, and they aren't taught anything about trauma, but only skim over the basics of the brain and nervous system. People like her are literally re-traumatising people by making victim-blaming blanket statements that are in favour of abusers. Every couple I've ever met that has subscribed her her nonsense, there is always one extremely selfish partner that cheats, and the other is expected to accept it and have an open relationship even when it goes against their values - all because this stupid woman says it's okay.
Great mind. I wonder if she knows how angry she sounds.
Angry, or agitated, or Involved? Passivity is very boring...and often Calm is inappropriate if teaching.
@@kirstinstrand6292
Well said
I think two or three women and one man is a great idea, you can count me in.
I have a question: "Why are you a prostitute?"
And sorry to disappoint you but I am multilingual (English is my 7th in order of acquisition), multicultural and "multidegreed" (including a doctorate). I am also the second generation
But there differences between us:
- I am a historian and masters in Jewish history is one of my degrees - ALL with a significant historical component.
- I despise psychobabbling
- most importantly - I am not a prostitute. I was raised by decent parents and chasing wealth and fame by selling antisemitism is not my thing.
Go and occupy something. Why would one actually study history and know something when one can be rich and famous by pushing universal hugging babbling?
She's makes Jordan Peterson look like an amateur on amorous relationships. I would NEVER listen to even one word from him about it.
Such a mess.
Esther you are absolutely dismissing the role of woman in ADULTRY AND POLYGAMY.