Me and my ex girlfriend broke up a month ago and one of the reasons is because I fell into the Toxic masculinity trap that Andrew Tate and others have been spewing on social media. It was driving me down a negative path where I had hate in my heart. Since then I have fighting and reframing every view I had taken from the “Red Pill” narrative and have been watching your podcast because she would always tell me to consider watching it and I can’t tell you how many times I have cried since watching your podcasts. I truly want to be a better man now and believe that I am man enough and don’t need to feel the way I was feeling which pushed her away. I want to thank you for this podcast and thank you for reminding men who may be in similar situation that we are man enough and don’t need to listen to this Andrew Tate like media.
Nathan, this is so beautiful for us to read. This is exactly why we make this show. We're not trying to convince anyone of anything. We're just trying to create a safe space for people to look at themselves and their relationships with others, like you are now doing. Kudos to you for opening yourself to different perspectives and taking a critical eye to the communities that have been guiding you recently. It's not easy at all. We're here for you, brother. Welcome.
Redpill wakes up men who’ve been fed lies of the Disney fairytale of wanting to always save women even though a lot of women don’t want to be saved and go right back to men who are pitfalls.
Thank you for sharing. I have seen how these influences have crept up in my brother's. They went from being respectful and nice to saying comments about how the sisters need to be in the kitchen (and the girls do cook), but they just make comment that are demeaning. It was hard to see the change. Good to hear some men make it back from that negativity.
Esther seems so pure and so genuine. She talks freely, laughs freely whilst making everyone feel heard. I listened to her for the first time today and already possess so much love for her already ❤️
@@lobsangtsetan534I've read a couple of your comments and they are myopic, ignorant, arrogant and vitriolic. Is that who you want to be? It seems a lot of biases (negativity bias and confirmation bias), cognitive distortions, are fueling your narratives. What's your relationship to introspection and metacognition? How much do you question the rhetoric that others say? How much do you question your own conditioning and thought patterns? How much do you consider your fears and how they drive your choices? Do you really understand love? How do you bring that to the world? Those are what you need to consider, vs some of your simplistic and missing the mark comments.
@@Alphacentauri819 well thank you for taking your time to respond. And sorry that you took internet 😒. And I don't know love. Are you willing to show me?
@@lobsangtsetan534 is English your first language? One sentence seemed very confusing, made no sense, that's why I ask. It's not my job to show you love. Do some reparenting on yourself. Show up for yourself. Learn self efficacy. Learn self empowerment. Learn to sit with all aspects of yourself. Learn to calm your nervous system (fight/flight/freeze/fawn) through yoga, meditation, writing. Something to get in touch with your body and what it tells you. You, need to show up for you. That means do all you can to bring healthy nourishment, whether that be food, what you put in your mind, who you surround yourself with, thoughts you allow and so on.
Thank you Justin, Liz, Jamey and Esther Perel. What a powerful conversation. One takeaway among many: “Why are you recruiting someone for a play they didn’t audition for”? Brilliant. #insight
Whether you are flipping burgers or flipping houses you're enough, you have always been enough. Be kind to everyone including yourself seems to me a good philosophy
i love how Ester responds to the question of men not taking a side with women on abortion , "We didn't invite men to the conversation of abortion...." and her other comment that "abortion has been genderized instead of being kept in the context of family...."
Ester is amazing. I wish I found her sooner, my relationship would probably still fall apart, but I'd know the red flags much sooner and of course, my own contribution to the problems that we had.
Looove Esther Perel! The work she does really is cut above the rest. It's also important to remember that what she does is also very very different. So she's speaking with a specific purpose that may be different from an ordinary person, a scorned prideful person, a person in recovery, or a frustrated activist etc. Really felt for Liz there, who is fighting for women's lives and rights to proper medical care. I understand what Jamey struggles with. I get that the message to the men who are trying their darndest could be less pointy. But can we get real about where people are harmed and where people are hurting? Because the level of danger that men and women face due to the actions of the opposite gender is significantly different.
I have already sent this podcast to those around me. It was so valuable to hear these. If we get a part 2, I’d be sooo happy! But still, enjoyed every second that make me question the way I see this world. Thank you soo much for diligently and consistently making the effort to help people understand and learn!!! I appreciate your podcast so much! ✨
I love what Esther said about the way we frame conversations in the United States. This was such a wonderful conversation and I feel blessed for having had the chance to listen in.
I had a great marriage, we started out as friends, he was raised by a single mother, and had great respect for women. He was masculine without feeling he had to dominate or control. We had great respect and friendship first. I'd been engaged before, but when you expect "The One" how hard are those expectations. What I look for in a man is a man who treats me good, don't blame someone for not knowing something, but how much of a relationship is all on one person. I got ghosted after 3 dates, he wanted friends with benefits, but I'm tired of that because what is my benefit, I let him know my rule, I deserve a relationship. He changed immediately afterward, I said I don't feel comfortable talking about sex unless I'm in a relationship and have an understanding. Each time I've gone against this I've been misused, and discarded quickly. I feel as if I'm judged harshly, but that's what he says he wants. There is a harsh double standard. I know there are wonderful guys out there. But I deserve to be treated respectfully.
It's not about a battle. Common courtesy and respect is to be cherished. A battle means someone loses and someone wins. There is no battle when you want to be proven right or wrong. The last guy wanted some of what I wanted, but the terms were not fair for both people. I expect honesty and integrity, when someone is looking for "The One" without expectations and standards that are impossible to achieve everyone loses. I'm increasing my friends so I can rely less on just one person or relationship. But a friendship and a relationship have two working parts. Both have to have mutual goals and standards, or it won't work.
what you put out there is also what you get. you want someone for what he can do for you and you get men that only want something from you. ask yourself what you can offer to men so you may find the men looking for what you can offer them.
I'm willing to treat people nicely. But so many of these guys don't ever ask me what I want. They tell me their requirements but are not willing to reciprocate. I am willing to reciprocate, but I need to know he chooses to show up, appreciate and treat me well. There are so many bitter angry men out there.
The only married friend I have married her high school sweetheart! She doesn't understand the gauntlet of dating, because she has literally only been on 1 date with someone else, ever. I still ask her for advice about relationships. But she can't advice me about dating and vetting.
Esther resonates with both men & women is that she has an amazing ability to make people feel like she’s meeting people where they are NOT where we want people to be
We definitely need many parts one is listening to Esther is always a learning, but for all the three hosts here I loved hearing them with so much gratitude & love 💕
I wish I could continue thanking all the people who’ve supported me over my 24 year career stripping. I’m so grateful. Thank u for all the inspiration to create more Esther✨💚
There's a reality show here or a documentary that somehow tracks people independently as they meet each other through dating apps. See how each side responds to the profile, messages, suggestions to meet, conversations on the phone, etc. What an interesting showcase in human behavior. And just think how much it would help people going through all this stuff. Hosted by Dax Sheppard and Esther Perel haha!
love the intro with all the snippets from season 1 and liz saying "man enough" with so much softness. Also love Esther Perel and could listen to her for hours! thank you for this episode. 🧡
It's a sad state when videos like this get a fraction of a percent of the attention that red pill aggressive toxic videos about dating does. It's always easier to relate to anger and blame others for easy answers instead of looking inward.
We agree! Trying to crack that code. We also have put a lot more effort into our audio podcast and get millions of views on clips of the videos on social, so we are certainly reaching people.
I hope, with a deep sigh, that you will read this comment. I'm a man who mostly feels unheard and unseen by watching this video as well as (I'm sad to say) other videos on your channel. So I am posting this comment sincerely but critically. For starters, what ARE the modern-day dating challenges for men that were supposedly discussed in this video? The video is almost entirely about relationships and perhaps one light mention about "the old scripts" for men and women being gone. Going further, I legitimately like your podcast crew but you seem somewhat oblivious to there being no single men on the channel, especially not single men who feel they are in a hopeless situation that is descending into life-and-death struggle. Does anyone on the podcast even have long time, close male friends that are like that? What do they feel? How do they live? As it stands now, I don't think you should consider your podcast as "reaching men". Men in hopelessness don't feel seen. Sorry for posting the truth.
It would be nice to get to the guest sooner and to the core topic sooner. And then stick with the core topic. This conversation isn't really about dating for men. I'll see if Esther has a straightforward video on her channel.
With regards to abortion, I really wish society would look to seman retention as an answer where men become involved in preventing unwanted pregnancy. The ancient practice needs a comeback.
Completely agree with you, and would simultaneously teach that women should practice what would be the female equivalent and abstain from sex outside of commitment. I think that to change culture you need to teach both sexes the lesson at the same time. Teach men to be highly selective and women to be highly selective.
How I feel about abortion rights as a man? They're a given. I would fight for them. Luckily I'm Scandinavian, nobody's questioning them here. Abortion is also widely available regardless of your income status. That's the way it should be, and it is.
I'm listening and thinking, how wild we are yet. Here is a Kyiv anecdote: - Abram, do you know, there is a new monument at the Maydan - for Non-Pissing Boy. - Oh, great, but what does he do? - He's suffering. "Forgive the infantry". Stop suffering, brothers, start thinking on yourselves. And be happy at a certain stage.
On the issue of the overturning of Roe v Wade, let us not forget that both the man and the women have the responsibility for the woman NOT getting pregnant. So, women, if you want to be ABSOLUTELY SURE that you won't get pregnant, don't have sex where there is no agreement to take that chance.
exactly. it’s dishonest to treat that conversation as if both the woman and man are not responsible. I do like how Esther stayed out of the abortion point and didn’t necessarily agree with what the young lady said, but instead challenged her to recognize that her voice won’t be for everyone not all folks will agree with your position and ideology, nor do they have to.
This is completely irrelevant to the issue. If a woman gets pregnant, she should not be forced to keep it. That is a human rights violation. And I like how you said men and women share the responsibility, but your last sentence puts all the blame on women. Classic.
Started listening to this because of esther perel being credited. But the start of "we (married men) say the truth but no one (single men) wants to listen to us" is a delusional comment. There are different life experiences and different challenges. Speaking as a formerly happily married man, now readjusting to be single. There are new things to be learnt and experienced i feel.
I've watched a few of your shows now, and it really feels like the audience you're going to attract will be mostly women. It's hard for me to totally nail it down why that is. I think a major thing men are struggling with right now is that their masculinity is labeled as "toxic". Something to be changed. A force of oppression. You guys use it often on your podcast, and I think it really just inspires shame amongst men, which is perhaps the intention. But if you make a podcast for men, that affirms a common narrative that men are the enemy or the antagonist, then you will probably find most men won't appreciate it. Anyways, though, men do need to engage in these topics for change to occur. I do appreciate that you're trying to encourage that.
I think you're right. To me it's the lingo the three jointly use. Feels a little to feminine to me. I'm 62 so maybe I'm out of touch with modern vocabulary. Esther is great though!
I’m a bit appalled at the fawning over Esther Perel. I’ve been aware of her for a number of years, and I’m pretty sure those who say she’s great might reconsider if they research her stance on a number of issues. For example, affairs. She has said on more than one occasion that affairs in committed relationships and marriages are fine because they (paraphrasing here) “allow one partner to indulge their sense of adventure,” thus adding excitement to the marriage. And that the cheating partner has no obligation to tell the other because they have a right to privacy. You all going for that? Research her online. There’s a lot more.
Esther Perel is a hardcore feminist! Her advice is hurting struggling men. Her advice makes it even worce. Never ask a fish how to catch the fish. Ask a successful fisherman. And: why should man protect and provide today, when his woman can break it of at any time, take the kids, take the house and the money? What’s the benefit for men to get involved with a modern women? Please talk about this with James Sexton and Rolo Tomassi.
Now podcasts are a very cool topic. Thank you for this video. The topic can be developed and talked about for a very long time. A relationship is really the work of two partners and the contribution should be 50/50. When a problem or misunderstanding arises, then both partners should also work on a solution, and not remain silent or tolerate it until it resolves itself. Healthy and conscious relationships are very valuable now.
The conversion about “abortion rights” is pretty short. Learn what a right actually is. You’ll realize the Dobbs decision is only supporting what a right actually is. And now, you just work to make it legal in your own state- if you can convince your own state, maybe you’ll be able to convince a country.
I'm impacted by the influential potency of this material. A book with related themes redirected my life's course. "The Art of Meaningful Relationships in the 21st Century" by Leo Flint
Great content guys 👏 I have yet to hear a fair criticism of Andrew Tate. Liz, recommend you watch Tates interview with Piers Morgan so you won’t caricature his position. Piers brings up the same concerns you do. You’ll know how to reach more Tate fans when you understand the message that resonates with his followers (regardless of whether you agree or not)
Coming in 4 months after the this. I think Liz deserves a badge of bravery for bringing up Roe V. Wade in this discussion. That said, I had been told in the mid 90's it was not an issue I was allowed to speak on because... as a man... I can't make babies. So why would she say men are supposed to speak on it now? I mean aren't men saying "yes" to reproductive rights for women, so transactionally women will say yes to casual sex with men? That was the assumption feminist writers made, and because of that I was not to bring my input to the subject.
To answer Liz’s question about involving men in the abortion conversation …. And this is all in good tone … #1 that conversation will never going anywhere, it’s all about who it affects … both sides are equally right and wrong #2 you sound like you just want more men to agree with you #3 be responsible with sex #4 i personally think that topic would make a lot of viewers just turn off the video, people are here to learn about love … that situation is a case by case scenario that’s between sexual partners.
Agreed. While I respect her sharing her stance, I don’t think it’s fair to suggest that we are not protecting women by not being cool with aborting babies. She should be open to the reality that there are plenty of men and women who disagree with abortion for a variety of reasons, and trying to lowkey shame men for not being accepting of it is quite unfair.
Honestly, I'm disappointed about Esther's responses to the female host here. I don't think that the responses really address the questions she's asking or her frustration. I think that original questions were legit and fair.
Seems like Liz wasn’t listening to what Esther was saying about abortion she just wanted people to be on her side. When Esther pointed it out that it wasn’t a gender issue and that the women claimed ownership over the debate already which left the men out of the conversation. She didn’t even acknowledge that Esther asked her to look at it differently like they do in Europe and how it’s seen as one of many parental issue.
Really wanted to give this podcast a chance but it immediately succumbs to stupid talking points like patriarchy, toxic masculinity etc. Not the high IQ conversation I was hoping for. Instead of investigating why men seek out role models like Tate, the speakers start shaming men and draw kitchen-sink-psychology conclusions. Clearly out of touch with what men are going through..
Such a nice interview! Thank you so much! I'd love to see Teal Swan on your show btw. She talks a lot about the things you talk about in this podcast.eg.ruclips.net/video/dCRM2gMHY1o/видео.html
I've been watching your podcast for a while now. I discovered this platform through a CNN article (Hit piece) on Andrew Tate. I find it hard to believe that you guys don't know who he is. In fact the CNN article leads people to believe that this show is an alternative to the "Red Pill". This show is what they (the manosphere) consider "Blue Pill". The males on the show come across very weak, extremely soft, victims. The young males out there who turn to Andrew tate, Fresh&Fit and Rich Cooper (just to name a few) are looking for leadership. In my opinion, this show is Hollywood's attempt to keep males soft, vulnerable, and emotional. Emotional males are dangerous, Andrew Tate says that all the time...and he is right. Hollywood has lost touch with regular people. This show will do as well as She Hulk, and Woman King. A little about me, I'm a 52 year old retired Air Traffic Controller, Desert Storm Veteran, and former US Army Paratrooper. I interact with the manosphere and I understand why so many young males are drawn to it. Congratulations on getting a second season by the way. Thank you for your time.. I wish you guys the best of luck, DL Saint
I completely agree that vulnerable and emotional men are dangerous… to the patriarchy! These men are warriors in the truest sense in that they face the backlash of men like those you listed, then forge ahead in order to create a system where men can be both powerful and in connection with those around them. As Esther said, you can’t have both in the system of patriarchy. The strength and courage of all three wonderful hosts of this podcast is inspiring. Hosts please remember: the more criticism and pushback you get, the more your message is reaching those who need to hear it the most; the closer you’ve come to touching on something in that individual’s soul that remains unhealed. Growth and healing can be painful. I’m a nurse so I picture my trauma as an abscess. I need to lance right into it and expose the infection underneath. When the infection is too big, sometimes it needs to be de-roofed so it can heal from the inside out instead of sealing back over to fester all over again. How do we de-roof the patriarchy?
I have given up personally on masculinity. Both extremes are so dangerous. i am not enough for sure of either side. I wished there was a centrist voice but I have totally given up on the human race. Humanity in 2022 AD is dangerous. (Views are my own and not reflective of others)
@@MinifigNewsguy Don't give up Brother. You shouldn't compare your quest to others. I listen to those who share their thoughts on both sides of the spectrum, RP and BP. I take what works for me and disregard what does not. The males on this platform push for a type of manhood that I see as weak, and that's fine. Some men in the manosphere push for a type of manhood that is too strong, and that is fine as well. Brother Steven become the best version of yourself, Mind, Body, and Soul. Be prepared to defend your beliefs and loved ones...with your life if necessary. And never stop improving. This is what Men do in my opinion. Never give up Brother... Peace
@@mikemartella5186I do not want to derail your reply, or speak for others in the thread, but from what I've researched "nice-guys", that have the signature traits of an "emotional male"; they can get angry or bitter over time, but I think that is flawed and doesn't focus on specific issues with a nice guy/emotional male. There is an idiom out there that "nice guys always finish last". But it goes back to these extremes of there is no healthy balance or having a guy learn to respond to emotions and adjust behaviors. That's too much common sense, and this podcast doesn't care for discussion on common sense. I forget this episode is about my highest vulnerability since birth _relationships_ and the thread and most of the comments are everything but. Nice work Man Enough producers!
I don't want to date. I guess I got screwed up growing up. I'm not gay or straight! I just want to be left alone! Right now I am being pursued, and I hate it. I don't want to be rude, but I'm going to have to be soon. Leave me alone! I have a good, active life, but I just want to live it alone.
what the fuck? since when is the consensus that married men are great advice givers to single women? should single men go to married women for advice? sure that would work in your dreams
I don't always agree with Tate, but gosh 7:08 to 7:10 is total garbage. Straight up lie. Or just taken out of context. I'll keep watching the clip because I'm open-minded, but if the host is full of sht, I'm a little scared of what I'm about to hear...
Are you okay? All of your comments on this channel are about Liz specifically. Is there something going on that you need to work through? This woman probably has no idea that you exist and you spend so much of your time bothered by her. Please go touch some grass and take some deep breaths.
@@cheyennewallace3130 I'm barely OK, just struggling with the extremes of masculinity often uttered without filters from the all three hosts. I've stride to be even-keel with all 3 (my comments about Liz specifically have been a few, and it was always intended to be constructive and not personal; since I don't do personal myself.) With regards to the "[she] has no idea that you exist" what that really means they doesn't read the comments people leave, by choice. Progressive voices are just as dangerous as drive time conservative talk radio. The problem is content creators "hear" the frustrations but refuse to "listen" to the concerns. This is been a pervasive issue with the mainstream media as well as the alt media, with podcasts. It's not good.
We are listening to you, Steven, and we read all the comments. We appreciate you bringing your perspective and welcome all views here. We do cringe at some of the more abrasive and violent language (e.g. oncoming thruway traffic), as it undermines the feedback you're providing. Sending love and gratitude for watching and thinking about these issues so deeply.
The fact the filled an entire hour and managed to make zero helpful points or declarations is honestly impressive. And no Liz lady, you don't have a right to kill your child. I guess you'll just have to be more responsible with sex.
Tate reminds me of the Tom Cruise character in the movie Magnolia... See the clips and you'll agree., and just like the movie said character is exposed as a fraud....
Me and my ex girlfriend broke up a month ago and one of the reasons is because I fell into the Toxic masculinity trap that Andrew Tate and others have been spewing on social media. It was driving me down a negative path where I had hate in my heart. Since then I have fighting and reframing every view I had taken from the “Red Pill” narrative and have been watching your podcast because she would always tell me to consider watching it and I can’t tell you how many times I have cried since watching your podcasts. I truly want to be a better man now and believe that I am man enough and don’t need to feel the way I was feeling which pushed her away. I want to thank you for this podcast and thank you for reminding men who may be in similar situation that we are man enough and don’t need to listen to this Andrew Tate like media.
Nathan, this is so beautiful for us to read. This is exactly why we make this show. We're not trying to convince anyone of anything. We're just trying to create a safe space for people to look at themselves and their relationships with others, like you are now doing. Kudos to you for opening yourself to different perspectives and taking a critical eye to the communities that have been guiding you recently. It's not easy at all. We're here for you, brother. Welcome.
Wonderful!
Bro you dodged a bullet. Andrew Tate is a voice to young men.
Redpill wakes up men who’ve been fed lies of the Disney fairytale of wanting to always save women even though a lot of women don’t want to be saved and go right back to men who are pitfalls.
Thank you for sharing. I have seen how these influences have crept up in my brother's. They went from being respectful and nice to saying comments about how the sisters need to be in the kitchen (and the girls do cook), but they just make comment that are demeaning.
It was hard to see the change. Good to hear some men make it back from that negativity.
Esther seems so pure and so genuine. She talks freely, laughs freely whilst making everyone feel heard. I listened to her for the first time today and already possess so much love for her already ❤️
She's really incredible, isn't she?
She ain't virgin though
@@lobsangtsetan534I've read a couple of your comments and they are myopic, ignorant, arrogant and vitriolic. Is that who you want to be?
It seems a lot of biases (negativity bias and confirmation bias), cognitive distortions, are fueling your narratives. What's your relationship to introspection and metacognition?
How much do you question the rhetoric that others say? How much do you question your own conditioning and thought patterns? How much do you consider your fears and how they drive your choices?
Do you really understand love? How do you bring that to the world?
Those are what you need to consider, vs some of your simplistic and missing the mark comments.
@@Alphacentauri819 well thank you for taking your time to respond. And sorry that you took internet 😒. And I don't know love. Are you willing to show me?
@@lobsangtsetan534 is English your first language? One sentence seemed very confusing, made no sense, that's why I ask.
It's not my job to show you love. Do some reparenting on yourself. Show up for yourself. Learn self efficacy. Learn self empowerment. Learn to sit with all aspects of yourself. Learn to calm your nervous system (fight/flight/freeze/fawn) through yoga, meditation, writing. Something to get in touch with your body and what it tells you.
You, need to show up for you. That means do all you can to bring healthy nourishment, whether that be food, what you put in your mind, who you surround yourself with, thoughts you allow and so on.
Thank you Justin, Liz, Jamey and Esther Perel. What a powerful conversation. One takeaway among many: “Why are you recruiting someone for a play they didn’t audition for”? Brilliant. #insight
We agree! Thank you for being here.
I could listened to Esther all day long. So much wisdom shared, thank you all.
We could too!
"Do the work" is my relationship mantra, period. ♡♡♡
It's a good one!
Please have a part 2 with Esther! She’s so engaging and insightful!
Whether you are flipping burgers or flipping houses you're enough, you have always been enough. Be kind to everyone including yourself seems to me a good philosophy
i love how Ester responds to the question of men not taking a side with women on abortion , "We didn't invite men to the conversation of abortion...." and her other comment that "abortion has been genderized instead of being kept in the context of family...."
Ester is amazing. I wish I found her sooner, my relationship would probably still fall apart, but I'd know the red flags much sooner and of course, my own contribution to the problems that we had.
She really is. So much wisdom, presented in such a digestible way.
I have listened to this talk, no joke, 10 times and sent it to key friends and men in my life. THANK YOU!
Wow, thank you!
That hour FLEW by, really need a part 2, 3, 4 and 5
Looove Esther Perel! The work she does really is cut above the rest. It's also important to remember that what she does is also very very different. So she's speaking with a specific purpose that may be different from an ordinary person, a scorned prideful person, a person in recovery, or a frustrated activist etc. Really felt for Liz there, who is fighting for women's lives and rights to proper medical care. I understand what Jamey struggles with. I get that the message to the men who are trying their darndest could be less pointy. But can we get real about where people are harmed and where people are hurting? Because the level of danger that men and women face due to the actions of the opposite gender is significantly different.
Thank you for this thoughtful comment. Glad you're here.
I have already sent this podcast to those around me. It was so valuable to hear these. If we get a part 2, I’d be sooo happy! But still, enjoyed every second that make me question the way I see this world. Thank you soo much for diligently and consistently making the effort to help people understand and learn!!! I appreciate your podcast so much! ✨
Thank you! We appreciate the kind words and you sharing it with others.
I love what Esther said about the way we frame conversations in the United States. This was such a wonderful conversation and I feel blessed for having had the chance to listen in.
I had a great marriage, we started out as friends, he was raised by a single mother, and had great respect for women. He was masculine without feeling he had to dominate or control. We had great respect and friendship first. I'd been engaged before, but when you expect "The One" how hard are those expectations. What I look for in a man is a man who treats me good, don't blame someone for not knowing something, but how much of a relationship is all on one person. I got ghosted after 3 dates, he wanted friends with benefits, but I'm tired of that because what is my benefit, I let him know my rule, I deserve a relationship. He changed immediately afterward, I said I don't feel comfortable talking about sex unless I'm in a relationship and have an understanding. Each time I've gone against this I've been misused, and discarded quickly. I feel as if I'm judged harshly, but that's what he says he wants. There is a harsh double standard. I know there are wonderful guys out there. But I deserve to be treated respectfully.
Mmm he ain't getting what he want, and you crying coz you ain't getting what you want.
Shalom.
Enjoy. Let's continue this x vs y battle
It's not about a battle. Common courtesy and respect is to be cherished. A battle means someone loses and someone wins. There is no battle when you want to be proven right or wrong. The last guy wanted some of what I wanted, but the terms were not fair for both people. I expect honesty and integrity, when someone is looking for "The One" without expectations and standards that are impossible to achieve everyone loses. I'm increasing my friends so I can rely less on just one person or relationship. But a friendship and a relationship have two working parts. Both have to have mutual goals and standards, or it won't work.
what you put out there is also what you get. you want someone for what he can do for you and you get men that only want something from you. ask yourself what you can offer to men so you may find the men looking for what you can offer them.
I'm willing to treat people nicely. But so many of these guys don't ever ask me what I want. They tell me their requirements but are not willing to reciprocate. I am willing to reciprocate, but I need to know he chooses to show up, appreciate and treat me well. There are so many bitter angry men out there.
The only married friend I have married her high school sweetheart! She doesn't understand the gauntlet of dating, because she has literally only been on 1 date with someone else, ever. I still ask her for advice about relationships. But she can't advice me about dating and vetting.
Yes!!!!! I’m so glad you guys got her on the show! Very excited for this one ❤❤
Esther Perel Put It DOWN! ✊🏼🙏🏼🤲🏼💗💪🏼
Esther resonates with both men & women is that she has an amazing ability to make people feel like she’s meeting people where they are NOT where we want people to be
We definitely need many parts one is listening to Esther is always a learning, but for all the three hosts here I loved hearing them with so much gratitude & love 💕
Thank you!
I didnt know this woman. Thank you for sharing this! The wisdom in this episode its intense.
Listened to her podcast “where should we begin” it’s so good!
Glad we could help you discover her. She's really amazing.
We need a part 2 thank you guys.
We'll work on it!
yes please ✨
This is an incredible episode, genuinely can’t wait to see part 2
Thank you!
Love is not a verb, it is a person. Love is patient, love is kind...these are characteristics of a person.
I wish I could continue thanking all the people who’ve supported me over my 24 year career stripping. I’m so grateful. Thank u for all the inspiration to create more Esther✨💚
There's a reality show here or a documentary that somehow tracks people independently as they meet each other through dating apps. See how each side responds to the profile, messages, suggestions to meet, conversations on the phone, etc. What an interesting showcase in human behavior. And just think how much it would help people going through all this stuff. Hosted by Dax Sheppard and Esther Perel haha!
You can end up with someone wonderful and unlike what you picture .
It happened to me (and to him)
love the intro with all the snippets from season 1 and liz saying "man enough" with so much softness. Also love Esther Perel and could listen to her for hours! thank you for this episode. 🧡
I love it too! “benevolent sexism”
Thank you!
So glad you're here with us.
Please, don't ever stop making such content! We need it more in today's time and world! Hats off to you guys.
Thank you so much for the kind words
Esther really REALLY gets men. Wow!
both their wives are listening and saying "oh yes, this is exactly how they are, the put in the work beautifully! oh yeah!"
OMG, that speech around minute 53 brings tears to my eyes and inspires me so much. Thank you all! Much love.
Yes! The 'advice for Liz' was exactly what I needed right now, so I am taking it as advice for me as well. Thank you.
Love Esther such a powerful resource
Love Esther Perel❤
GREAT GREAT episode 🤩 we definitely need a part 2 with Esther pleaaaase!!!
We'll work on it!
Please inform us when the part 2 can be expected. Thanking you in advance 🙏🏼
It's a sad state when videos like this get a fraction of a percent of the attention that red pill aggressive toxic videos about dating does. It's always easier to relate to anger and blame others for easy answers instead of looking inward.
We agree! Trying to crack that code. We also have put a lot more effort into our audio podcast and get millions of views on clips of the videos on social, so we are certainly reaching people.
36:48-38:50 interesting.
And beautiful intro and outro of the podcast.
Thank you.
So glad you enjoyed them. Thank you, as always, for being here with us.
Wow, we need a part two for this beautiful, deep conversation❤.Thank you🌝. Your questions were great and very very helpful🔥
Glad to hear that. Thanks for being here.
I hope, with a deep sigh, that you will read this comment. I'm a man who mostly feels unheard and unseen by watching this video as well as (I'm sad to say) other videos on your channel. So I am posting this comment sincerely but critically. For starters, what ARE the modern-day dating challenges for men that were supposedly discussed in this video? The video is almost entirely about relationships and perhaps one light mention about "the old scripts" for men and women being gone. Going further, I legitimately like your podcast crew but you seem somewhat oblivious to there being no single men on the channel, especially not single men who feel they are in a hopeless situation that is descending into life-and-death struggle. Does anyone on the podcast even have long time, close male friends that are like that? What do they feel? How do they live? As it stands now, I don't think you should consider your podcast as "reaching men". Men in hopelessness don't feel seen. Sorry for posting the truth.
We need a part 2, please and thank you! Love this episode so much!
Thank you!
PART TWO PLEASE ❤❤❤
Amazing conversation, Esther is a presence
Please bring Jake Woodard onto this show. That would be an episode not to be missed!
Thank you for this convo., y’all ❤️
It would be nice to get to the guest sooner and to the core topic sooner. And then stick with the core topic. This conversation isn't really about dating for men. I'll see if Esther has a straightforward video on her channel.
Love is a verb🥹
such a wisdom!
With regards to abortion, I really wish society would look to seman retention as an answer where men become involved in preventing unwanted pregnancy. The ancient practice needs a comeback.
Completely agree with you, and would simultaneously teach that women should practice what would be the female equivalent and abstain from sex outside of commitment. I think that to change culture you need to teach both sexes the lesson at the same time. Teach men to be highly selective and women to be highly selective.
@@briantucker7173 agreed!
Esthers husband must be so happy. In so many ways.
32:12 what if I come to you resenting my own mistakes in past relationships and the fact that i never had a good teacher
How I feel about abortion rights as a man? They're a given. I would fight for them. Luckily I'm Scandinavian, nobody's questioning them here. Abortion is also widely available regardless of your income status. That's the way it should be, and it is.
Beautiful to hear that. We need more men to take that stance.
I'm listening and thinking, how wild we are yet. Here is a Kyiv anecdote:
- Abram, do you know, there is a new monument at the Maydan - for Non-Pissing Boy.
- Oh, great, but what does he do?
- He's suffering.
"Forgive the infantry". Stop suffering, brothers, start thinking on yourselves. And be happy at a certain stage.
On the issue of the overturning of Roe v Wade, let us not forget that both the man and the women have the responsibility for the woman NOT getting pregnant. So, women, if you want to be ABSOLUTELY SURE that you won't get pregnant, don't have sex where there is no agreement to take that chance.
exactly. it’s dishonest to treat that conversation as if both the woman and man are not responsible. I do like how Esther stayed out of the abortion point and didn’t necessarily agree with what the young lady said, but instead challenged her to recognize that her voice won’t be for everyone not all folks will agree with your position and ideology, nor do they have to.
And this applies to the 13 year old girl who is pregnant from being raped by her uncle or her mother’s boyfriend how?
This is completely irrelevant to the issue. If a woman gets pregnant, she should not be forced to keep it. That is a human rights violation. And I like how you said men and women share the responsibility, but your last sentence puts all the blame on women. Classic.
Amazing, it felt too short though. Thank you for bringing her. Love her work.
We agree - way too short. We'll work on getting more time with her.
Started listening to this because of esther perel being credited. But the start of "we (married men) say the truth but no one (single men) wants to listen to us" is a delusional comment. There are different life experiences and different challenges. Speaking as a formerly happily married man, now readjusting to be single. There are new things to be learnt and experienced i feel.
47:45 - yes, I can name five men among my friends who disagree with the overturning of Roe.
Thank you for sharing that!
I've watched a few of your shows now, and it really feels like the audience you're going to attract will be mostly women. It's hard for me to totally nail it down why that is.
I think a major thing men are struggling with right now is that their masculinity is labeled as "toxic". Something to be changed. A force of oppression. You guys use it often on your podcast, and I think it really just inspires shame amongst men, which is perhaps the intention. But if you make a podcast for men, that affirms a common narrative that men are the enemy or the antagonist, then you will probably find most men won't appreciate it.
Anyways, though, men do need to engage in these topics for change to occur. I do appreciate that you're trying to encourage that.
I think you're right. To me it's the lingo the three jointly use. Feels a little to feminine to me. I'm 62 so maybe I'm out of touch with modern vocabulary. Esther is great though!
I’m a bit appalled at the fawning over Esther Perel. I’ve been aware of her for a number of years, and I’m pretty sure those who say she’s great might reconsider if they research her stance on a number of issues.
For example, affairs. She has said on more than one occasion that affairs in committed relationships and marriages are fine because they (paraphrasing here) “allow one partner to indulge their sense of adventure,” thus adding excitement to the marriage. And that the cheating partner has no obligation to tell the other because they have a right to privacy. You all going for that?
Research her online. There’s a lot more.
Esther Perel is a hardcore feminist!
Her advice is hurting struggling men. Her advice makes it even worce.
Never ask a fish how to catch the fish. Ask a successful fisherman.
And: why should man protect and provide today, when his woman can break it of at any time, take the kids, take the house and the money?
What’s the benefit for men to get involved with a modern women?
Please talk about this with James Sexton and Rolo Tomassi.
Now podcasts are a very cool topic. Thank you for this video. The topic can be developed and talked about for a very long time.
A relationship is really the work of two partners and the contribution should be 50/50.
When a problem or misunderstanding arises, then both partners should also work on a solution, and not remain silent or tolerate it until it resolves itself. Healthy and conscious relationships are very valuable now.
I LIKE TOP G
The conversion about “abortion rights” is pretty short. Learn what a right actually is. You’ll realize the Dobbs decision is only supporting what a right actually is. And now, you just work to make it legal in your own state- if you can convince your own state, maybe you’ll be able to convince a country.
agreed.
Does anyone know which of Ester's podcasts she was referring to as bad therapy?
I'm impacted by the influential potency of this material. A book with related themes redirected my life's course. "The Art of Meaningful Relationships in the 21st Century" by Leo Flint
Thank you! Glad you're here with us.
Great content guys 👏 I have yet to hear a fair criticism of Andrew Tate. Liz, recommend you watch Tates interview with Piers Morgan so you won’t caricature his position. Piers brings up the same concerns you do. You’ll know how to reach more Tate fans when you understand the message that resonates with his followers (regardless of whether you agree or not)
I’ve had plenty of great women. In the end, I couldn’t afford them.
Coming in 4 months after the this. I think Liz deserves a badge of bravery for bringing up Roe V. Wade in this discussion. That said, I had been told in the mid 90's it was not an issue I was allowed to speak on because... as a man... I can't make babies. So why would she say men are supposed to speak on it now? I mean aren't men saying "yes" to reproductive rights for women, so transactionally women will say yes to casual sex with men? That was the assumption feminist writers made, and because of that I was not to bring my input to the subject.
To answer Liz’s question about involving men in the abortion conversation …. And this is all in good tone … #1 that conversation will never going anywhere, it’s all about who it affects … both sides are equally right and wrong #2 you sound like you just want more men to agree with you #3 be responsible with sex #4 i personally think that topic would make a lot of viewers just turn off the video, people are here to learn about love … that situation is a case by case scenario that’s between sexual partners.
Agreed. While I respect her sharing her stance, I don’t think it’s fair to suggest that we are not protecting women by not being cool with aborting babies. She should be open to the reality that there are plenty of men and women who disagree with abortion for a variety of reasons, and trying to lowkey shame men for not being accepting of it is quite unfair.
I appreciate this conversation, but it is difficult to understand what the hosts mean when they use terms like "unpack" and "do the work."
Could someone answer me ? ❤
Why do men feel insecure like andrew tete ? Like why would they feel they are not enouph ?
Honestly, I'm disappointed about Esther's responses to the female host here. I don't think that the responses really address the questions she's asking or her frustration. I think that original questions were legit and fair.
Seems like Liz wasn’t listening to what Esther was saying about abortion she just wanted people to be on her side. When Esther pointed it out that it wasn’t a gender issue and that the women claimed ownership over the debate already which left the men out of the conversation. She didn’t even acknowledge that Esther asked her to look at it differently like they do in Europe and how it’s seen as one of many parental issue.
Really wanted to give this podcast a chance but it immediately succumbs to stupid talking points like patriarchy, toxic masculinity etc.
Not the high IQ conversation I was hoping for. Instead of investigating why men seek out role models like Tate, the speakers start shaming men and draw kitchen-sink-psychology conclusions. Clearly out of touch with what men are going through..
Take a shot every time Esther says “yeah” or “mhmm”.
35:30 - thanks, Esther
'if you have any sense of you being enough'
dude doesn't even realize how long the odds are on that if...
Such a nice interview! Thank you so much! I'd love to see Teal Swan on your show btw. She talks a lot about the things you talk about in this podcast.eg.ruclips.net/video/dCRM2gMHY1o/видео.html
My wife Kathy met our daughters basketball coach with me. After the third time I let him take her to bed.
Can you elaborate?
5:25 say u guys aren't validating each other's opinions very much eh
8:55 that's much better, just show a frame of her nodding =)) good content mates
I've been watching your podcast for a while now. I discovered this platform through a CNN article (Hit piece) on Andrew Tate. I find it hard to believe that you guys don't know who he is. In fact the CNN article leads people to believe that this show is an alternative to the "Red Pill". This show is what they (the manosphere) consider "Blue Pill". The males on the show come across very weak, extremely soft, victims. The young males out there who turn to Andrew tate, Fresh&Fit and Rich Cooper (just to name a few) are looking for leadership. In my opinion, this show is Hollywood's attempt to keep males soft, vulnerable, and emotional. Emotional males are dangerous, Andrew Tate says that all the time...and he is right. Hollywood has lost touch with regular people. This show will do as well as She Hulk, and Woman King.
A little about me, I'm a 52 year old retired Air Traffic Controller, Desert Storm Veteran, and former US Army Paratrooper. I interact with the manosphere and I understand why so many young males are drawn to it.
Congratulations on getting a second season by the way. Thank you for your time..
I wish you guys the best of luck,
DL Saint
I completely agree that vulnerable and emotional men are dangerous… to the patriarchy! These men are warriors in the truest sense in that they face the backlash of men like those you listed, then forge ahead in order to create a system where men can be both powerful and in connection with those around them. As Esther said, you can’t have both in the system of patriarchy. The strength and courage of all three wonderful hosts of this podcast is inspiring. Hosts please remember: the more criticism and pushback you get, the more your message is reaching those who need to hear it the most; the closer you’ve come to touching on something in that individual’s soul that remains unhealed. Growth and healing can be painful. I’m a nurse so I picture my trauma as an abscess. I need to lance right into it and expose the infection underneath. When the infection is too big, sometimes it needs to be de-roofed so it can heal from the inside out instead of sealing back over to fester all over again. How do we de-roof the patriarchy?
I have given up personally on masculinity. Both extremes are so dangerous. i am not enough for sure of either side. I wished there was a centrist voice but I have totally given up on the human race. Humanity in 2022 AD is dangerous.
(Views are my own and not reflective of others)
@@MinifigNewsguy Don't give up Brother. You shouldn't compare your quest to others. I listen to those who share their thoughts on both sides of the spectrum, RP and BP. I take what works for me and disregard what does not. The males on this platform push for a type of manhood that I see as weak, and that's fine. Some men in the manosphere push for a type of manhood that is too strong, and that is fine as well. Brother Steven become the best version of yourself, Mind, Body, and Soul. Be prepared to defend your beliefs and loved ones...with your life if necessary. And never stop improving. This is what Men do in my opinion. Never give up Brother...
Peace
Hi DL Saint, I'm Mike. I'm curious...what is it that makes emotional males dangerous?
@@mikemartella5186I do not want to derail your reply, or speak for others in the thread, but from what I've researched "nice-guys", that have the signature traits of an "emotional male"; they can get angry or bitter over time, but I think that is flawed and doesn't focus on specific issues with a nice guy/emotional male.
There is an idiom out there that "nice guys always finish last". But it goes back to these extremes of there is no healthy balance or having a guy learn to respond to emotions and adjust behaviors. That's too much common sense, and this podcast doesn't care for discussion on common sense.
I forget this episode is about my highest vulnerability since birth _relationships_ and the thread and most of the comments are everything but. Nice work Man Enough producers!
I don't want to date. I guess I got screwed up growing up. I'm not gay or straight! I just want to be left alone! Right now I am being pursued, and I hate it. I don't want to be rude, but I'm going to have to be soon. Leave me alone! I have a good, active life, but I just want to live it alone.
what is the game they play at the beginning with esther
game.estherperel.com/ 😊
👍🏽🙏🏽
what the fuck? since when is the consensus that married men are great advice givers to single women? should single men go to married women for advice? sure that would work in your dreams
Liz, as an empowered woman, you DO realize that in 2023 you do have the power to not get pregnant in the first place. Right?
It's a tough time for men and for women.
Hey Justin, Russell Brand wants his hairdo back!
I don't always agree with Tate, but gosh 7:08 to 7:10 is total garbage. Straight up lie. Or just taken out of context. I'll keep watching the clip because I'm open-minded, but if the host is full of sht, I'm a little scared of what I'm about to hear...
Correct bro... the hosts lied about Tate - not impressed..... but I like Esther Perel
_ [Comment proactively retracted by original author] _
Are you okay? All of your comments on this channel are about Liz specifically. Is there something going on that you need to work through? This woman probably has no idea that you exist and you spend so much of your time bothered by her. Please go touch some grass and take some deep breaths.
@@cheyennewallace3130 I'm barely OK, just struggling with the extremes of masculinity often uttered without filters from the all three hosts.
I've stride to be even-keel with all 3 (my comments about Liz specifically have been a few, and it was always intended to be constructive and not personal; since I don't do personal myself.) With regards to the "[she] has no idea that you exist" what that really means they doesn't read the comments people leave, by choice. Progressive voices are just as dangerous as drive time conservative talk radio.
The problem is content creators "hear" the frustrations but refuse to "listen" to the concerns. This is been a pervasive issue with the mainstream media as well as the alt media, with podcasts. It's not good.
We are listening to you, Steven, and we read all the comments. We appreciate you bringing your perspective and welcome all views here. We do cringe at some of the more abrasive and violent language (e.g. oncoming thruway traffic), as it undermines the feedback you're providing. Sending love and gratitude for watching and thinking about these issues so deeply.
The fact the filled an entire hour and managed to make zero helpful points or declarations is honestly impressive. And no Liz lady, you don't have a right to kill your child. I guess you'll just have to be more responsible with sex.
The presentation of Andrew Tate is nothing but false 😂 please make sure to share correct information!
I think you all should have Tate on your show before judging. Because some of that stuff your saying about him isn't true at all.
Again. Another podcast missing to point out personality disorders.
I don’t like that female interviewer she seems like a mess and makes me feel anxious
Might make sense to spend a little more time listening to her. Her concerns are felt by many many women
Sister, I FEEL you. Stop everyone! Listen to the woman. She still got ignored. “Sounds like important to you”. Men don’t get it.
Yes, this!! Even in this show.
Tate reminds me of the Tom Cruise character in the movie Magnolia... See the clips and you'll agree., and just like the movie said character is exposed as a fraud....
So cringe. Lol.