Esther Perel on The Other AI: Artificial Intimacy | SXSW 2023
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- Опубликовано: 30 мар 2023
- These last few years have been characterized by prolonged uncertainty when it comes to our health, politics, economy, and beyond. Can you blame us for falling deeper into the siren song of our increasingly predictive technologies? Endless suggestions of what to buy, who to date, what to write, where to turn, and what to listen to next flow right into our palms-fooling us into thinking we have control over this unknowable, messy world. The deluge of perfectly curated feeds doesn't help. Renowned psychotherapist, podcast host, and author Esther Perel wants to know: what is this doing to our relationships? How are our expectations of one another changing? It is possible that “knowing” everything is making us less prepared for the uncertainties and imperfections intrinsic to life and love. Chasing certainty has left us inflexible and socially atrophied. How is this impacting our partnerships, friendships, and communities? Much as we try, we can’t optimize intimacy-or can we?
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40:22 'every choice carries grief for the option that we didn't choose' 👏👏👏👏
"Much of life's challenges are not problems that we solve, they are paradoxes that we manage." A brilliant quote from Ester.
Carl Jung.
19:26 19:28
Esther is sublime! At 32:00: "A unique part of intimacy is that when we allow ourselves to truly meet another, we also meet new parts of ourself."
Can’t do that with modern XXs. It’s emotional self deletion.
I cried through most of this because when you feel like no one else "gets you" (and humanity), Esther does. She is pure gold.
Really, I just laugh
there should be statues of this woman in every major city
As well as her teachings in educational institutions.
How much sooner we would learn to process our emotions and how better our relationahips would be if that were the case.
Just like Jesus
Esther is good, but she misses the whole point that many relationships are not compatible to begin with, hence, narcissists and codependent relationships. She is sort of perpetuating the question how to have a good relationship, but the first thing that needs to happen is see if you are dealing with personality disorders.
I just want to help myself and others. It was nice what you said, but I think she isn’t the bottom line. She is good at having interesting talks, but if you really want a good relationship, personality disorders need to be pointed out first before you spend time trying to fix something that can’t be fixed or statues are placed everywhere of a woman that doesn’t really help you. she is very much like a dating app. She is fast and appealing, but when you dig deeper, something is missing or completely off.
Anyways. Esther is good at playing at the heart strings and humor, but she isn’t pointing out the first line of defense which is understanding personality disorders.
Probably best there aren't.
Smart, well-spoken, erotically intelligent, and very sexy...
I can't afford to be turned on all the time.
I need to be able to get things done 😂
@@dime7612 99% of the western population has a personality disorder. Good luck avoiding them.
Human Esther is an absolute GODSEND. Grateful for her work, in love with her personality.
How clearly and beautifully put. I love this quote: Our ability to act freely upon the uncertainty and then see the ripples of our own actions lets us know we are alive. 👏
This is a master class in paradoxes and living through very complex times. Thank you allways ❤
When a seminar of 59.52 minutes feels like a 30 min talk, then you know the richness of the conversation has been huge, she (and the audience) are awesome! It is such a pleasure listen to her, I would not change it for an AI ;)
The segment on Esther's answer about the polarization issue in conversations was worth the entire watch. Thank you.
The video demonstrating different responses from the child, when mom either engaged or disengaged, brought tears to my eyes.
It touched a part of me that I haven’t been listening to for many years. Thank you for your great work, Esther Perel!
58:35 "I sound super confident, but I am sure of nothing" leads me to respect her even more. She is a wonderful teacher and helper to me through her talks and books. Thank you, Esther and audience.
Reminds me of the story of the zen master who ended his teaching by saying I really don't know much about anything...
Esther is absolutely phenomenal. The arch of her speech, the playfulness, the depth and richness - one of a kind. Loved every minute of this, thank YOU!!!!!
I always find a huge value in listening to Esther's ideas. Her work is very inspiring and has become a beacon of light in my life. Thank you for sharing this, SXSW-san.
She is brilliant! She brings clarity and understanding to relationship dynamics.
Esther just gets what it means to be a human being.
Even though she jokes at the end and says, “I sound super confident but I am sure of nothing.”
Knowing that you don’t know is a sign of wisdom.
Dear Ms Perel..I had a lovely man once. Back in 1987. He had a personality and energy and he loved me. Now he is my device addicted man playing some 8 to 10 to 12 hours a day...or pursuing his possible options irregardless of how lonely I tell him I am..whole in the same bed or room or car. I wish I could convey the best of times. His kindness his gentle intelligence. His physical strength for such a lean guy..and his beauty. And humor. What a clever joker he was. Now all I see is his face reflected in a screen. I wish so very much that you could help us. Keep your keen discernment sharp for us listeners. He really listens to you! I think it's that little bit of "dutchness" in your voice inflection, or have I gotten the country wrong? Anyways we love you. And I keep praying I will someday see that fellow again that I knew way back then. 38 years ago
Hey not sure if Esther would see this at all, likely not. Have you tried to write to her? Or attend one of her online workshops?
This woman is my idol. Period.
Esther's work (written and spoken) has been a great aid lately in my life, I treasure her writings greatly.
I loved how she pooled the questions at the end and just focused on answering the best ones. There were a couple questioners who clearly didn't "get it"; she so gracefully maneuvered around confronting them
So true, my husband of almost 40 years would never have met the checklist criteria I would use for a dating app. So I would not be married with children, living this life which I'm mostly content with.
Brilliant & insightful woman !
We live by playing the cards we are dealt, and the variables that go with each card turned is our individual journey.
The wisdom you bring to the truth of the many variables brings great hope for moving forward with hope to discover our true selves. Thanks for your constant renewing of your message.
Please add Spanish subtitles. It’s such an important topic!!!
Please, could you invest in subtitles? This talk needs to be shared outside of the sole English speaking audience.
"Digitally facilitated connections are now lowering our expectations of intimacy between humans..."
I LOVE this. Esther you did it again.
Esther is A Beautiful Human Being with a Gift to Heal and Create such Love, Intimacy and Life in others, without real connection a heart can only grow cold, we need connection that is Purpose for myself in Life… holding the polarity and learning there is no right or wrong…Incredible Humility and Wisdom, her words fill one with wonderful inspiration. Her Gifts of Clarity, Insight and Knowledge that she articulates and conveys with brilliance, she’s helping thousands…We are never done learning…Absolutely Grateful.
Omg 😢 , this is so powerful n heart wrenching 💔. Place this on the curriculum on the humble university of life . Sadly , we are all guilty . Thankfully, there is a way bk home to Eros ❤
Ester is beauty-full. Thank you Ester.
Esther is ABSOLUTELY BRILLIANT ❤❤❤❤❤
Wondeful woman. Everyone nowadays should listen to this talk. 🙏🙏🙏
So deeply grateful for this. To have such a great female leader and role model is everything 😮
Her response to 46:17 made me Lol! Love her. Such a great talk. So important.
This was an excellent talk. Thank you for putting it here.
Fantastic and fascinating - Esther Perel is a gem.
She is AMAZING!!! Merci Esther!!!
This lecture and sharing should saved and broadcasted for generations to come., they will need it.
She asks all the important questions. ❤
She never ceases to amaze me. I love the reality of her words and how it sometimes smacks me in the face to hear! 🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼💕💕💕💕
Such an inspiring person! So grateful to be able to hear her wisdom.
Esther is a wonderful person and teacher. An Angel in human form!!!❤❤❤
It would be so cool if she went on the Lex Fridman podcast
Beginning reminds me of movie “HER”… a must watch!
Brilliant observations Estelle I am backing u up 100 percent 🕊💕the dangers are very obvious and ur beautiful wisdom is so brilliant 🙏⭐️thank u May your voice heard every where 🌟
This woman is a genius!
Thank you much Esther for your contributions. ❤
Thank tou for sharing these amazing points of view!!
Honor to hear this woman ! 😊
I came across this today and it made me feel hopeful. Thank you so much...
Wow. This woman is brilliant. she presents both skillfully and effortlessly.
She is absolutely brilliant! 🙌🏼👏🏼
Wow I got really strong goosebumps and gratitude at min around 52:30
Wow. Really incredible talk! Thank you for sharing!
Absolutely fabulous 🎉All the way through Esther 🤗
Brilliant. And so generous
What a brilliant talk
I love this woman ❤
Thank you, Esther, your energy, intelligence and chuzpe is a joy to witness.
Every time watching Esther is a wonderful, lightening time
The participation segment was such a strong yet simple demonstration of human interaction and reaction.
She's amazing
Queen
Bravo Esther! Magnificent talk.
Madame you are fantastic !
I can’t believe there are only a handful of comments here relative to the issues being tackled and the amount of wisdom being dropped here.
Thank you
Love her!
❤️just love your way handling all of our life situation true our emotions of living in these days being a widow since 14 years knowing to love myself first to be love By another in equal give and take just being moi❤️thank you ❤️love
Absolute Queen 👑
Nice video!
I always find her amazing and moving in her very human insights.
Outstanding
It looks like you are going to have to do many more tours; there is a great hunger for your expertise and insights. The subject of the value of emotions is becoming bigger and bigger; a very good development that has not really been addressed on a mass scale in human history.
She is amazing
So excellent 👌
How amazing is she!!
This is Excellence.
Brilliant speech
right on with the Ai because I HAVE FALLEN INTO THIS PSYOP AS WELL.
I really resonated with preceding reading for which this is related. But I couldn’t make this fit. I never settled on if this was my mom, dad, brother, or husband. The pieces just didn’t fit clearly, it wasn’t obvious 🤔 The last card though felt relevant. Thank you
love her
Why the Q&A make me wanna cry? :(
I want to go back to pre-internet days. Honestly, its too much. Too much information. Too much communication and not enough embodied intimacy. We ignore the body and the body comes to dominate. The body will demand to be listened to. It will make us depressed or anxious or come up with a million somatic symptoms or simply flat numbness. Also: has Esther Perel been reading Byung-Chul Han?
great woman
What an amazing woman
Is it just me thinking that human Esther just made an update for ai Esther
You’re got me questioning my recent vr toys purchase for long distance lovin
I was afraid of AI but after this talk, I am not. Thanks Esther! x
Big up Aundre from Jamaica 🇯🇲. 😁
Omgggg the baby part was so sad
Wow!
I am asking myself, how to handle conflict in a realtionship in Form of do we vax our children or not.. the pandemic destroyed a lot of relationships because of this Kind of topics.
Many nuggets of obvious but profound witty remarks. Offered symptoms of human contradictory living vignettes and inspiring positive longings instead of dwelling on resentment. Remind me to embrace paradox, dilemma, meaningful living coming from struggling with eroticism in a broader perspective..
❤❤❤ her
30:04 - ugh …
33:20 - true. (married 30 years)
So interesting! and so much to think about! Life is complicated sometimes lol Thank you
Heinlein's book. Moral imperative is survival. But there are steps in stair.
Circunstances dictates conducts that makes results.
Moral dilemas are about which step on the stair increases chances of survival, but dependind on circustances one choses short or long objectives. Enabling allingments.
Eloquent and humane.
It's amazing to see Esther furious. I don't know maybe it's just me. I just watch a lot of her talks and am working with body, so I pick up on things. Do you see it?