Being childfree by choice: five women on why they decided not to have kids

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  • Опубликовано: 6 июл 2020
  • As part of the Guardian's Childfree series, five women discuss why having children isn't for them - and how others perceive them as a result. 'There's no wrong way to be a woman,' says Sabrina, 25.
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    #childfree #childfreebychoice #kids #children #guardian

Комментарии • 23 тыс.

  • @theGuardian
    @theGuardian  3 года назад +512

    Read our entire series here ► www.theguardian.com/us-news/series/childfree
    We want to hear from childfree women: share your experience ► guardiannewsandmedia.formstack.com/forms/being_childfree_in_the_us

    • @GhulamMustafa11111
      @GhulamMustafa11111 3 года назад +11

      What if their moms didn't have them lol?
      Guardian make a part 2 of this series maybe like 30 years down the line and we'll see.

    • @Guda6
      @Guda6 3 года назад +7

      The Guardian this is not accurate as people are not honest and you just want to make it sound so ok and normal there’s a lot more going on in a woman’s mind that’s decided I don’t want kids. But comes home to several cats and teddy bears.

    • @ChildfreeGirls
      @ChildfreeGirls 3 года назад +73

      The more childfree people of all ages share their experiences, the more the myths surrounding the childfree lifestyle will dispel. There are those who don’t want to believe or hear anything a childfree person has to say, but for any who are curious, there is a vibrant community.

    • @hemera73
      @hemera73 3 года назад

      @@paulgibbons2320 yeah , and that s what all co v i d 19 is about!!!

    • @paperdoll5467
      @paperdoll5467 3 года назад +32

      Please pose this same question to men. Would love to see that b/c it's not a unique issue to women (maybe a few different nuances of course) but same endpoint...no kids. Thanks. If you already have, please post that video.

  • @natashacoda4354
    @natashacoda4354 3 года назад +11703

    Let’s be real: if ppl were more honest about not wanting children, there would be a lot less neglected or abused kids in the world.

    • @user-ur2wd8du4z
      @user-ur2wd8du4z 3 года назад +358

      THIS THIS THIS !!!!!

    • @Alex-yg3nv
      @Alex-yg3nv 3 года назад +290

      And less population

    • @greenwich42
      @greenwich42 3 года назад +411

      if ppl would be more educated and actually careful about how to avoid pregnancy

    • @offbeatblackgerl8360
      @offbeatblackgerl8360 3 года назад +19

      True

    • @celestek.2395
      @celestek.2395 3 года назад +11

      I don’t fully understand the correlation.

  • @prussiangreen6940
    @prussiangreen6940 3 года назад +6129

    I think it’s pretty selfish to want to have kids as a retirement plan.

    • @evieparada
      @evieparada 3 года назад +529

      True and there’s no guarantee that they will be there for you when your old.

    • @tbonerossigiggles6076
      @tbonerossigiggles6076 3 года назад +59

      Very true

    • @CatEyeGem
      @CatEyeGem 3 года назад +22

      🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾this

    • @stephaniem895
      @stephaniem895 3 года назад +286

      Or as your caregiver in your senior years. I’ve been asked sssoooo many times.... “well who’s going to take care is your when your old?”
      I’m like- yeah that’s a terrible reason to have kids.
      Save up for your senior care.... it’s selfish to expect your children to be your caregivers and do nothing to plan for your own care.

    • @ShiaGirl18
      @ShiaGirl18 3 года назад +28

      That's exactly what happened to me!

  • @Dailyfiver
    @Dailyfiver 2 года назад +781

    As a dude who doesn’t want kids, it’s refreshing to know that there’s actually women out there who feel the same way as I do.

    • @NaNa-re3wc
      @NaNa-re3wc Год назад +142

      It’s also refreshing to know there’s men out there who don’t. So ditto dude

    • @_Reize_
      @_Reize_ Год назад +65

      I never thought there are men who don't wanna have kids . Thank you for existing dude❤

    • @mateaukalua4426
      @mateaukalua4426 9 месяцев назад +27

      ​@@_Reize_Way more men don't want kids than you could ever imagine. I would say around 30% in America whilst worldwide it might be 15%.

    • @sss6678sss
      @sss6678sss 9 месяцев назад +1

      ​@@_Reize_67% of men are childless compared to females-34%

    • @LucareonVee
      @LucareonVee 6 месяцев назад +24

      I’m the same. A man who doesn’t want kids. In fact, I just realized that I just surpassed the age my dad was when I was born. Best ya there, dad! 😎

  • @ainurazhibekova1969
    @ainurazhibekova1969 14 дней назад +21

    As a mother of 3 I can’t blame anyone for not wanting to have kids.

  • @aprilchow-chee5281
    @aprilchow-chee5281 3 года назад +9413

    Let's be real a lot of parents aren't really parents even though they have kids

  • @t0misin
    @t0misin 3 года назад +9771

    Selfish is having children you know you can't take care of.

    • @yingyang1008
      @yingyang1008 3 года назад +45

      Don't think it's selfish - all that work, stress and worry

    • @cassandra9581
      @cassandra9581 3 года назад +529

      @@yingyang1008 Is irrelevant because people still constantly have children for selfish reasons.

    • @yingyang1008
      @yingyang1008 3 года назад +31

      @@cassandra9581 How is it selfish to want a family?
      It's what the vast majority of humans want to do and is very hard work, you literally give your life to a other out of love

    • @cassandra9581
      @cassandra9581 3 года назад +425

      @@yingyang1008 I didn't say it was selfish to want a family... I said people still have children for selfish reasons, I didn't say everyone does.

    • @faz949
      @faz949 3 года назад +11

      exactlyyyyy

  • @promisemakgopa7978
    @promisemakgopa7978 2 года назад +1789

    When one of the women said ' it's important for me to have a man who cares about me being me and not what I can produce for him ' I felt that

    • @bjap1563
      @bjap1563 Год назад

      And maybe she also do the same if that same man decides to have one with her.

    • @harrisn3693
      @harrisn3693 Год назад +52

      But a man wants to have his own progeny. You do realize that these women fell for feminist agenda

    • @LucareonVee
      @LucareonVee Год назад +302

      @@harrisn3693
      Not true. I’m a man who would only date a person who doesn’t want children.

    • @6years_
      @6years_ Год назад +21

      As long as you see him in the same light

    • @ojs5988
      @ojs5988 Год назад +182

      @@harrisn3693 the man I'm currently with ended his previous relationship because SHE wanted kids and he doesn't. There's plenty men and women who don't want kids but society tries to shame us

  • @Rainjojo
    @Rainjojo 2 года назад +295

    People call those who are childfree ‘selfish’, but as soon as you bring up overpopulation or abusive parenting they completely ignore the subject

    • @lottevannoort1211
      @lottevannoort1211 2 года назад +12

      I think being called selfish is totally valid. I choose to live life for me not for anyone else. Selfishness should not be seen in such a negative light. It just means one chooses one's own feelings, time, resources for their own.

    • @thasright7067
      @thasright7067 2 года назад +76

      @@lottevannoort1211
      Being childfree is not selfish tho. You cannot be selfish to a non-existent child.

    • @lottevannoort1211
      @lottevannoort1211 2 года назад +5

      @@thasright7067 but you can be selfish in choosing to live life for yourself instead of for another person. We're being selfish for choosing to do what we want to do.

    • @thasright7067
      @thasright7067 2 года назад +58

      @@lottevannoort1211
      You're only selfish if your decisions affect someone else. Choosing to live for yourself isn't selfish as long as you're not hurting anyone or doing it at the expense of someone else.

    • @Childfree334
      @Childfree334 2 года назад +49

      Totally agree. How am I selfish for making decisions about MY life that don't affect anyone else? How am I hurting the world or being selfish by not breeding? That is completely illogical to me.

  • @marinadee2771
    @marinadee2771 3 года назад +4936

    Having kids isn’t for everyone and that is 100% ok.

    • @sucram1015
      @sucram1015 3 года назад +67

      Right, even though I'm kind of in between on whether or not I want kids. At 21 years old, I'm already mostly in the position and decision of not wanting kids at all.

    • @AiBernadas
      @AiBernadas 3 года назад +8

      True. :)

    • @ChristinaOstil115
      @ChristinaOstil115 3 года назад +5

      Would you adopt a baby like Moses?

    • @tommywise
      @tommywise 3 года назад +53

      Plus it's not like the human race will go extinct anytime soon.

    • @kaitlynbryant1437
      @kaitlynbryant1437 3 года назад +63

      lolcano234 i think that anyone over the age of 18 is fully capable of making their own decisions:)

  • @lissy1595
    @lissy1595 3 года назад +4988

    every child should have a parent, but not every parent should have a child

    • @kiki11974
      @kiki11974 3 года назад +10

      Yokubō amen 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

    • @leiajiang7877
      @leiajiang7877 3 года назад +53

      I have 2 fur babies.

    • @ruyahalavurte1507
      @ruyahalavurte1507 3 года назад +93

      i think every child should have a parent but not every person should be a parent will be more suitable. Cause there are parents who no longer have a child

    • @sharj7583
      @sharj7583 3 года назад +2

      FACTS!!!

    • @eliastta437
      @eliastta437 3 года назад +62

      To be a parent means u have a child-

  • @Sasafrass14
    @Sasafrass14 2 года назад +491

    “The thing about regret is.. you don’t regret what you don’t want to do” Absolutely love this!

  • @Ali-gb7mf
    @Ali-gb7mf 8 месяцев назад +331

    My mother to!d me that having kids prevented her from living her life. She told me when you have kids your life ends. Needless to say I've never had kids. I don't regret it and I appreciate my mom's truth.

    • @jackpot1359
      @jackpot1359 8 месяцев назад +23

      Respect to your mom👍 I wish mine was like yours

    • @fjordbear3050
      @fjordbear3050 6 месяцев назад +19

      What a terrible mom, she basically didnt want you in her life…. If she could stuff you back in, she would💀

    • @jackpot1359
      @jackpot1359 6 месяцев назад +41

      @@fjordbear3050 She didn't want him but still loved him enough if she didn't want him to repeat her mistakes

    • @charlest2858
      @charlest2858 5 месяцев назад +4

      She lied to you

    • @mixedfeelingsaboutturning1910
      @mixedfeelingsaboutturning1910 5 месяцев назад

      3.9333333333333333333333333333333

  • @pedroportillo1585
    @pedroportillo1585 3 года назад +5549

    Having children is a personal choice, and nobody’s business but yours.

    • @member968
      @member968 3 года назад +120

      This mindset is the main problem. Nobody seems to think from the perspective of the child, only themselves and how they are benefitted by having a baby.

    • @Andresfin
      @Andresfin 3 года назад +204

      @@member968 the child doesn't exist yet so why does it matter?

    • @jasonmartin4775
      @jasonmartin4775 3 года назад +134

      @@member968 Judging on how the world is, right now, how would it benefit a child to be born?

    • @member968
      @member968 3 года назад +50

      Jason Martin the problem that many people overlook is that a child isn’t there before conception. So before conception, only the parents are there to be benefitted. So fundamentally a child cannot benefit from being born, regardless of the state of the world.

    • @nicholassantana6180
      @nicholassantana6180 3 года назад +3

      There are consequences ...... I would agree with you if those consequences didn't affect me

  • @eva-maria7066
    @eva-maria7066 3 года назад +3833

    Regret of having kids would be way worse than regret of not having kids.

    • @summerwest3099
      @summerwest3099 3 года назад +124

      Exactly. Thank you.

    • @adelechelsea4036
      @adelechelsea4036 3 года назад +77

      This. All over.

    • @NamesIWantAreInvalid
      @NamesIWantAreInvalid 3 года назад +106

      You actually wouldn't know that because its impossible to experience both in one lifetime

    • @andreaf8404
      @andreaf8404 3 года назад +320

      NamesIWantAreInvalid they are not saying it because of the actual feeling, they are referring to the fact that regretting having children actually affects your child, in ways that can be very damaging. if you regret not having children, it would be a terrible feeling but it wouldn’t affect another human being for the rest of their lives. plus, if you change your mind about kids, you could always adopt, but if you children you can never undo that.

    • @popnpets8022
      @popnpets8022 3 года назад +45

      NamesIWantAreInvalid yeah you could regret not having kids at a certain point and then eventually have kids and regret it

  • @kotimara8711
    @kotimara8711 2 года назад +224

    As a man who also doesn’t want to be parent, you all have my respect for being voluntarily childless.

  • @debbiechadwick861
    @debbiechadwick861 Год назад +325

    Interesting! I never met other women who felt like I do. I'm 71 now and never wanted kids and still no regrets.

    • @bleubby
      @bleubby 11 месяцев назад +38

      Omgg its so cool to see someone older than me who doesn't have kids cause people always tell me "i'm too young to know that" or "i'll obviously change my mind when i'm older" which sucks hearing

    • @brownbrownbrown2938
      @brownbrownbrown2938 11 месяцев назад

      @@bleubbyGET OFF MY PROPERTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • @Hibiscus123
      @Hibiscus123 10 месяцев назад +28

      63 no kids, no regrets

    • @brownbrownbrown2938
      @brownbrownbrown2938 10 месяцев назад

      @@Hibiscus123 Kells and windmills and Shay Mccay dark wood cabinets above where there's oil and grease on the high school chemistry lab table leading to lots some complaints from classmates about that all in the different room across the hall you go in and sit down one day.
      Next, trip to Andover for music competition in 2 days but then when you're on the bus and when it's a bit dark at six in the morning to go there, and hear the noise while going fast, it reminds you of compounds of the oil and orangish red grease from food

    • @tacoexpressSEEDEEholeeveryones
      @tacoexpressSEEDEEholeeveryones 10 месяцев назад

      @@Hibiscus123 Would you consider leaving on a red cloth regular table lamp in the bedroom and a tubular vintage oval bulb desk lamp in the office, and seeing which type of bulb burns out first after a while, "doing an experiment" ?

  • @rondaleigh
    @rondaleigh 3 года назад +5556

    I'm 61, never had kids and have zero regrets.

    • @alijashahi7731
      @alijashahi7731 3 года назад +453

      You’re a smart lady, I bet you’re so much happier. I’m following your footsteps and I’m 20!

    • @alijashahi7731
      @alijashahi7731 3 года назад +16

      @@shridhark6819 what? 😐

    • @christins.1481
      @christins.1481 3 года назад +536

      @@asheru9254 I'm 37. Married 19 years. One cat. Two dogs. No kids.
      Since you're wanting to compare animals here. I seen a kid take a dump on the living room floor.
      Having kids and animals is messy. There's no difference. Animals are easier to care for than a human.

    • @bea8861
      @bea8861 3 года назад +274

      @Ooki Cooki Ok buddy.

    • @baldr6894
      @baldr6894 3 года назад +9

      Why do you look like someone I know

  • @-youresogolden-7829
    @-youresogolden-7829 3 года назад +2681

    I don’t want children because I’m not able to take care of my own mentality, and I don’t want to risk breaking my own child’s mentality.

  • @carinaadams6797
    @carinaadams6797 8 месяцев назад +51

    *”You don’t regret not doing what you don’t want to do”* 👏

    • @hello-sz7hp
      @hello-sz7hp 8 месяцев назад

      Would you consider leaving on 2 tables lamps with 2 different types of bulbs and seeing which lamp burns out first, how long it takes for each one, and why, a type of science experiment? ??

    • @MarxMuru
      @MarxMuru 8 месяцев назад +8

      @@hello-sz7hp be gone kid.

    • @maroonmaroonmaroon2985
      @maroonmaroonmaroon2985 8 месяцев назад

      @@MarxMuruess are ess

  • @bolotabr12
    @bolotabr12 20 дней назад +11

    It’s a personal choice. People have to stop criticizing each other.

  • @lepidopter-an
    @lepidopter-an 3 года назад +3538

    People popping out kids to fill an emotional void and then tell childfree people we're selfish. The irony! (imagine your kid with cancer, that's the risk you take)

    • @akankshakumari5692
      @akankshakumari5692 3 года назад +72

      True.🔥

    • @aliengirl2013
      @aliengirl2013 3 года назад +85

      children are an attachment. And attachment is sadness

    • @ShootingStar4008
      @ShootingStar4008 3 года назад +11

      exactly!

    • @patricksaxon3983
      @patricksaxon3983 3 года назад +19

      Couples don't pop out kids to fill an emotional void, they have babies to fulfill a dream of having a large family.

    • @cramdram4735
      @cramdram4735 3 года назад +161

      @@patricksaxon3983 at times it is due to an emotional void, 50 -66 percent of parents have emotional issues, many direct to kids to fill that void.

  • @nevaehstreet7204
    @nevaehstreet7204 3 года назад +8129

    A woman shouldn’t have to explain why she doesn’t want to have children. Your body. Your choice. Your life. Your path.

    • @eazymethod01
      @eazymethod01 3 года назад +87

      I'm more and more respectful of that choice now, especially if a primary driver for people is the improvement of the current state of the world.

    • @msilence2009
      @msilence2009 3 года назад +66

      Yea let's all have fun in this beautiful western civilization. Children? Who needs that problems!

    • @kepspark3362
      @kepspark3362 3 года назад +44

      F*** yeah! I agree.

    • @bananasmatter1321
      @bananasmatter1321 3 года назад +6

      Soooooo it's a selfish decision...?

    • @daivabaniene3815
      @daivabaniene3815 3 года назад +52

      I really wish it would be that easy...It would be if you would live in a jungle or a desert , but unfortunately we live in a judgemental society.

  • @champsammy13
    @champsammy13 2 года назад +77

    Vasectomy is the best decision I've ever made.

  • @melfreemans
    @melfreemans 8 месяцев назад +324

    I'm 62...I've heard it all. You're selfish, you'll die alone, what about your legacy? I opted for serving my country in the military rather than motherhood. My legacy? Their freedom... that is my legacy as a veteran. Try calling a veteran selfish. I will spend my declining years alone in a nursing home with all the moms out there whose kids are too busy to visit.

    • @laurenmontera9516
      @laurenmontera9516 2 месяца назад +24

      I have a great respect for anyone who puts on the uniform with pride and honor for their country.

    • @GK-op4oc
      @GK-op4oc 2 месяца назад

      "My legacy? Their freedom... that is my legacy as a veteran. Try calling a veteran selfish"
      Females are out of harms way.

    • @GK-op4oc
      @GK-op4oc 2 месяца назад +6

      "I opted for serving my country in the military rather than motherhood."
      You would have been more useful as a mother of 2+ children. Without an adequate birthrate, there is nothing to protect

    • @Abishhhhh
      @Abishhhhh 2 месяца назад

      @@GK-op4oc are you like actually fcking slow?

    • @LucareonVee
      @LucareonVee Месяц назад

      @@GK-op4oc
      With over 8 billion people on the planet, there won’t be any life at all. Not having children at this time is more important.

  • @SuperTonyony
    @SuperTonyony 3 года назад +5036

    To anyone reading this message: If you are not absolutely certain that you want to have kids...PLEASE DO NOT HAVE KIDS! Every child deserves to be wanted.

  • @fvkijay
    @fvkijay 3 года назад +15705

    It's funny that this is even controversial.

    • @kkurova9345
      @kkurova9345 3 года назад +481

      It's just women oppressing each other and themselves edit: I hate that so many people liked this comment lol

    • @erikleith4670
      @erikleith4670 3 года назад +85

      its not women just wanna complain

    • @iwillnotseeyourreply.9235
      @iwillnotseeyourreply.9235 3 года назад +1081

      It's controversial because child free women are just told they'll come around to it, change their minds, regret not having kids, etc. Several doctors also refuse to perform sterilization surgery for the same reasons. Women aren't complaining just to complain. They want their wishes to be taken seriously.

    • @iwillnotseeyourreply.9235
      @iwillnotseeyourreply.9235 3 года назад +619

      @@kkurova9345 It's old men. It's almost always old men getting into women's business trying to control everything.

    • @fvkijay
      @fvkijay 3 года назад +233

      I will not see your reply. I think you misunderstand my post. I'm talking about the people who make it controversial because they're appalled by the mere fact that a woman can choose not to have children.
      That's
      Fucking Hilarious

  • @BigBoyO56
    @BigBoyO56 2 года назад +263

    How can you be selfish to a child that doesn’t exist?

    • @kissme1518
      @kissme1518 2 года назад +49

      That's what I told my sister years ago when she said I was being selfish

    • @taurean06031990
      @taurean06031990 Год назад

      I don't think that's what they mean.

    • @Emmatriaaa
      @Emmatriaaa Год назад +12

      I’m struggling to wrap my head around how not having a child is selfish. I can’t think of a genuine reason. Someone enlighten me.

    • @anonmouse15
      @anonmouse15 Год назад +33

      ​@@Emmatriaaa Selfish = You are not altering your life in a way that makes me feel better about my own life choices.

    • @NaNa-re3wc
      @NaNa-re3wc Год назад +5

      @@anonmouse15 haha so true, well said.

  • @PeriwinkleB
    @PeriwinkleB 2 года назад +646

    “You don’t become a real woman till you become a mom” that is the dumbest, most heartbreaking, most ignorant thing I heard someone say to my friend and I when we said that we don’t want children. Never justify your reasons, it’s your life and YOUR body. You’re not any less than a woman if you don’t conceive 🌸

    • @laylax3020
      @laylax3020 Год назад +60

      i think they forget about the women who want kids and can’t conceive too. we’re all REAL women 💕💕

    • @carnivoroussarah
      @carnivoroussarah Год назад +21

      That is NOT a friend.

    • @mateaukalua4426
      @mateaukalua4426 9 месяцев назад +11

      That is society marginalizing women. Quite like a real man will do XYZ.

    • @itsakid-6288
      @itsakid-6288 9 месяцев назад +1

      ​@@carnivoroussarahThey said they heard someone say it to their friend.

    • @meltedvelveetacheesesauce4540
      @meltedvelveetacheesesauce4540 8 месяцев назад +4

      That's misogynistic! There's no such as a "real" woman.

  • @sandianbc8732
    @sandianbc8732 3 года назад +7746

    Having a kid to not be lonely is probably the worst decision ever.

    • @alexandrapanico374
      @alexandrapanico374 3 года назад +900

      Yeah like go and make some friends, lol. There is 0 guarantee that kid will even like you, let alone be there and support you in old age.

    • @diomerda111
      @diomerda111 3 года назад +217

      @@mrjoe9545 selfish like few other things and nobody guarantees you the kid will look after you.

    • @KG-kk3ef
      @KG-kk3ef 3 года назад +8

      No way!

    • @anikadev8324
      @anikadev8324 3 года назад +598

      Having a child to save a marriage is even worse

    • @MysticDivinerLJ
      @MysticDivinerLJ 3 года назад +127

      THIS IS A WHOLE TOPIC THAT NEEDS TO BE DISCUSSED!!!!!!

  • @Amipunkiponk
    @Amipunkiponk 3 года назад +3527

    Wanting a kid because you want somebody to take care of you when you're old, is SELFISH

    • @Pink_pr1ncess
      @Pink_pr1ncess 3 года назад +330

      Ironically when children are adults they don’t even visit their parents in nursing homes 🥴

    • @David-qk7lc
      @David-qk7lc 3 года назад +208

      @@Pink_pr1ncess yeah and when they pass the siblings fight over money 😂.

    • @charlotterandall8738
      @charlotterandall8738 3 года назад +18

      Like anyone actually does that.

    • @originaltheme5826
      @originaltheme5826 3 года назад +12

      @@David-qk7lc 😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣😆

    • @rose4490
      @rose4490 3 года назад +26

      ... and it's also presumptuous.

  • @MariaMunoz-rz1nz
    @MariaMunoz-rz1nz 2 года назад +120

    I’m a 60 year old and happily married for 40 years and I didn’t had kids by choice. No regrets 😊

    • @bennewman4675
      @bennewman4675 Год назад +3

      I think the partner they want to be with is more important. Like if they wanted to have kids and they was with a partner who couldn't have kids or didin't want kids. Some people would stay with the partner and go with out kids

  • @HaHaHaHolowence
    @HaHaHaHolowence Год назад +50

    Having kids just costs way too much money, the end.

    • @HaHaHaHolowence
      @HaHaHaHolowence Год назад +2

      @Patrick Greatest and Best of best For both married and single parents kids cost way too much money too.

    • @akritirana6622
      @akritirana6622 Год назад +4

      Agreed

    • @LoneWolf-vu6qy
      @LoneWolf-vu6qy Год назад +1

      Normally you end up getting the " you're just bad a managing money " line from people.

  • @user-rm1lm3rt7e
    @user-rm1lm3rt7e 3 года назад +3262

    PSA: YOUR CHILDREN ARE NOT A RETIREMENT PLAN

    • @conductingintomfoolery9163
      @conductingintomfoolery9163 3 года назад +47

      Yes they are, if a child cost 500k each then it’s going to be in my investments portfolio or it’s a failure of a investment

    • @saketadarsh7606
      @saketadarsh7606 2 года назад +7

      @Oat Meal you won't get that love, affection , unconditional instincts etc

    • @fuabtreter7302
      @fuabtreter7302 2 года назад +132

      @saket adarsh you get to sleep, you're not at risk of having any complications/don't have to deal with the problems of being pregnant, you have more money, you will have more time for your friends and/or partner who will also give you love, you don't have to worry about being a bad parent and raising/teaching the kid, it won't be loud all the time, ...

    • @mo.ka.9661
      @mo.ka.9661 2 года назад +17

      Children literally pay into the older generation's social security

    • @fuabtreter7302
      @fuabtreter7302 2 года назад +159

      @@mo.ka.9661 And that shouldn't be your only reason to have a child, they're humans.

  • @CaliCassiez
    @CaliCassiez 3 года назад +2379

    Just because you have a child DOES NOT MEAN you automatically become an amazing put-together person.

    • @cecejamesable
      @cecejamesable 3 года назад +183

      Say it louder for the people in the back. Some people just should not have kids.

    • @Zeverinsen
      @Zeverinsen 3 года назад +104

      I guess people automatically forget that there are orphans and children in foster care.
      They just conveniently forget about abusive parents or children growing up in poverty.
      The wilful ignorance is a bit disgusting, quite frankly.

    • @katherinep708
      @katherinep708 3 года назад +47

      TRUE. Lots of irresponsible parents out there

    • @mwva13
      @mwva13 3 года назад +5

      Children are destructive forces of chaos that makes life harder... but I still want one.

    • @woolypuffin392
      @woolypuffin392 3 года назад +32

      My hubby wants kids (we are 25 and 27) but as much as I love him, he is not ready. We fight over splitting bills or that he has a lot of savings and I have not and I think he does not see how a baby is very expensive and involves a lot of financial decisions. I also feel like I am not ready for kids at all. I want to travel the world and a child would ruin my plans. Covid made it even worse as I have a bucket list I want to do before even considering kids and I already am way behind and now travelling has been impossible for almost a year and it does not get better.

  • @st-wq3kj
    @st-wq3kj 8 месяцев назад +101

    The fact that some men feel so enraged by women who choose themselves is pathetic

    • @danidiaz2377
      @danidiaz2377 3 месяца назад +17

      They just want control over us. Men still barely help out with the kids if they don’t completely abandon thier family completely and then try to shame women who refuse to make the sacrifices they never make either.

    • @salvador8923
      @salvador8923 3 месяца назад +2

      @@danidiaz2377It’s not “helping out with the kids” it’s doing his part as a father, helping implies it’s not something he has to do.

    • @hiddentruths6961
      @hiddentruths6961 Месяц назад +5

      Hey come on I'm a man and I don't want kids either, I respect and support all women who choose not to have kids, and both men and women shouldn't be pressured into having kids by their partners.

  • @Ana.K.Rodriguez
    @Ana.K.Rodriguez Год назад +69

    Im 27 years old and since I was 16 I decided that I did not want to be a mother and everyone tells me that I’m a self entitled brat and that I’m being selfish. Childbirth is very painful and it’s something that can cost you your life and that is what is truly selfish because you can’t force someone to practically put there lives at risk. I’m glad to see more and more men and women that agree and support others that want to live a child free life.

    • @gleelights9525
      @gleelights9525 Год назад

      Vaccine is to 20th booster
      As
      Being maskless and unvaccinated is to catching co...
      .. Wait what??? You tricked me!!!!

    • @anonmouse15
      @anonmouse15 Год назад +12

      Nothing says selfless like demanding that others have unwanted children against their will to make the accuser feel better about their own choices!

    • @progenderrole5150
      @progenderrole5150 Год назад

      @@gleelights9525 I'm trans. I want to nurse Justin Bieber's babies.

  • @KH-nt7ej
    @KH-nt7ej 3 года назад +1657

    I am 46. No kids. Like kids but not for me full time. Will never regret this decision. Ever.

    • @gilly1522
      @gilly1522 3 года назад +73

      You go girl, I respect that

    • @deerheart87
      @deerheart87 3 года назад +68

      Me too I'm 48 no kids I'm v pleased I never had one

    • @miraclehuntley8257
      @miraclehuntley8257 3 года назад +34

      Sammy d that was really rude and unnecessary for you say hun

    • @mayasayonara9169
      @mayasayonara9169 3 года назад +38

      @@sammyd3577 If you cannot communicate without throwing insults and using mean words, you're a bully.

    • @Shuyin781
      @Shuyin781 3 года назад +37

      @@sammyd3577 you don't have a wife, let alone a girlfriend, do you ?

  • @britjj5126
    @britjj5126 3 года назад +1729

    When she said “It’s been important to find someone who is interested and cares about me for me and not what I can produce for him.” That’s a word!

    • @elenaK0023
      @elenaK0023 3 года назад +84

      I loved that !!! Just because we have place for caring a child in our bodies doesn't mean we are born to be incubators !

    • @molihua15
      @molihua15 3 года назад +73

      @Benghali In Platforms We are born to be so many things, from artists to scientists. I'm sorry but almost all mothers I know are misarable, on pills and some openly say they regret having children. We are not animals and civilization was build on us rejecting our biological "destiny".

    • @xocomora
      @xocomora 3 года назад +22

      Yeah. I had a boyfriend who wanted me to have his babies. I abandoned him because he was cheating me. He never loved me.

    • @xocomora
      @xocomora 3 года назад +26

      @Benghali In Platforms well, in a biological sense we born to reproduce the specie, but not at all because we have other kind of mental development compared with other animals. We are the major plague in the world, this place doesn't need more humans, the world needs to be repaired. And we aren't baby incubators, due to our mental development, a human has the capability to create and explore other kind of things. Well, being a millennial mentally is not bad, this generation is more conscientious about world.

    • @Moszan
      @Moszan 3 года назад +21

      @Benghali In Platforms I'll happily be a wine aunt then. Lol

  • @deepsavannah9723
    @deepsavannah9723 Год назад +121

    The suffering and the stress of living in this world made me make this decision my generation ends with me.

    • @txlyons2937
      @txlyons2937 Год назад +23

      You are wiser than most.

    • @LutherusPXCs
      @LutherusPXCs Год назад +1

      Now is the best most comfortable time in human History believe it or not, stress of living lol get real, life will always have stress and discomfort

    • @pauldirc..
      @pauldirc.. 6 дней назад

      ​@@LutherusPXCsand meaningless

  • @dgiordano1000
    @dgiordano1000 5 месяцев назад +59

    Being childfree is best decision i ever made.

  • @alexandravanpaassen5441
    @alexandravanpaassen5441 3 года назад +3358

    Why are people mad about some women not wanting to have children. The world is getting overpopulated anyways. Some people not wanting to have kids is not a crime.

    • @chitrikart2328
      @chitrikart2328 3 года назад +43

      YEAH

    • @Darksecret_23
      @Darksecret_23 3 года назад +15

      Explain to me how the world is overpopulated?

    • @netflixmania8576
      @netflixmania8576 3 года назад +327

      Even if the world wasn’t overpopulated though it’s still the woman’s choice and absolute madness that it needs to be justified

    • @Anana315
      @Anana315 3 года назад +268

      Fall7Standup8 Chosen The world is overpopulated relatively to the ressources that we have left. There are too many people for not enough food, water etc. Mainly because of the overconsumption in industrialized countries and overuse of natural ressources for profit.
      Scientists predict that sooner or later, even in the richest parts of the world, there won’t be enough food and water for everybody. Some even say that the future generations will never know what it’s like eating some of the things we eat today like fish for example.

    • @elwhite1992
      @elwhite1992 3 года назад +206

      @@Darksecret_23 You're in this comment section, so you obviously have access to the internet. Go do your due diligence and look it up for your self.

  • @ashleyamazin2489
    @ashleyamazin2489 3 года назад +40295

    The world would be a better place if adults who don’t want children or feel like they would not be good parents, would just not have any.

    • @Spokentruths725
      @Spokentruths725 3 года назад +2097

      True a lot of people do it out of being selfish. Lack of control or responsibility AND some actually do it because they look at kids as accessories.

    • @cassiazaharia4776
      @cassiazaharia4776 3 года назад +1220

      People are not educated enough to even think of that

    • @uwumart2023
      @uwumart2023 3 года назад +235

      amen

    • @Noel11897
      @Noel11897 3 года назад +137

      Str8 fax

    • @SOPHIA-wh6uq
      @SOPHIA-wh6uq 3 года назад +93

      Yeah true

  • @driskey82
    @driskey82 5 месяцев назад +26

    41 and childfree here. Consultation to get fixed is 2/28!

  • @Limosethe
    @Limosethe 8 дней назад +6

    For me, I feel the world is too horrible to force children to endure it. It’s a moral stance as far as I’m concerned.

  • @MsEmmiii
    @MsEmmiii 3 года назад +1692

    I hate "but who is going to take care of you when you're old?". That's what's really selfish to me. Your children deserve to have a life of their own. What if they want to move to the other side of the world? There are other ways to prevent loneliness.

    • @dangermenatwork
      @dangermenatwork 3 года назад +60

      THIS

    • @user-pp6kd7ut4k
      @user-pp6kd7ut4k 3 года назад +150

      Right. Not to mention if they saved their money instead of having kids they don't have to worry about being taken care of when they're old.

    • @vaderladyl
      @vaderladyl 3 года назад +18

      @@Vivian-oq5wz Oh yes. I've seen it too.

    • @thatahamoment497
      @thatahamoment497 3 года назад +7

      Exactly 👏

    • @miagolez7059
      @miagolez7059 3 года назад +35

      My grandma is at her 80's we don't even take care of her she just lives

  • @kkariana5319
    @kkariana5319 3 года назад +2726

    I don’t understand how people go on about how painful childbirth is and what a complete struggle and sacrifice raising children is but judge people for not wanting it.

    • @TatianaDepetris
      @TatianaDepetris 3 года назад +455

      @@jamesedwards366 you sound really happy yourself and not at all judgemental. It's probably all those kids you had.

    • @The3llen
      @The3llen 3 года назад +405

      James Gillings typically ‘Karens’ are stay at home mothers and housewives of a certain generation that feel so bitter about not having their own career because they spent most of their lives cleaning up after their kids that they take their issues out on strangers and act as a ‘Karen’ as a cry for attention. Having kids does not guarantee that you won’t be lonely- your kids may not be in your life if they choose so. Grow up.

    • @kkariana5319
      @kkariana5319 3 года назад +201

      Ellen W I think a lot of the people have trouble understanding that their opinions and feelings aren’t universal facts for everyone.

    • @Kerrviii
      @Kerrviii 3 года назад +8

      Yeah but you have never carried a child I’m guessing soooo you’ll never understand. It’s worth it.

    • @Kerrviii
      @Kerrviii 3 года назад +5

      James Gillings I agree.

  • @saviourawudzi5244
    @saviourawudzi5244 4 месяца назад +20

    Being child free is selflove not heartless

  • @ZeebyGleeby
    @ZeebyGleeby 21 день назад +15

    Not having children has been life’s greatest gift to me. Don’t like it? Kick rocks 😂

    • @jonjonas9020
      @jonjonas9020 20 дней назад

      How old r u?

    • @scipion34
      @scipion34 14 дней назад +3

      ​@@jonjonas9020 This matters how?

    • @jonjonas9020
      @jonjonas9020 13 дней назад

      @@scipion34 haha, she will find out

  • @zdmuchnelamniejesien
    @zdmuchnelamniejesien 3 года назад +30740

    Calling people who don't want children "selfish" is the most absurd thing of all. Bringing unwanted children into the world, that's what's truly selfish.

    • @kaptenlemper
      @kaptenlemper 3 года назад +1715

      Heck, depending on the motivation, the act of bringing a child to the world *is* selfish.

    • @kiwi.1243
      @kiwi.1243 3 года назад +95

      how is it selfish

    • @kaptenlemper
      @kaptenlemper 3 года назад +2509

      @@kiwi.1243 a child does not ask to be brought into the world, it is a decision made by the parents' based on a want. They *want* to pass on their genes, they *want* to raise a new human being, they *want* to conform to societal norms, etc. The child, of course, has no say in this decision.

    • @mftcuaresma
      @mftcuaresma 3 года назад +904

      Yeah, that's something I definitely agree wholeheartedly. I never wished to be born and yet here I am writing this comment. 😆

    • @zdmuchnelamniejesien
      @zdmuchnelamniejesien 3 года назад +759

      @@kaptenlemper very true. Not to mention the issues such as overpopulation, etc.

  • @rexis188
    @rexis188 3 года назад +577

    Does anyone else get the impression that some of the women who criticize and question others for not having children are actually doing so because they felt pressured into it, and now they feel bitter seeing a woman living a full and happy life without children?

    • @user-ht9oc7gw1f
      @user-ht9oc7gw1f 3 года назад +67

      Yes! They feel threatened because they did not have a choice or it goes against their beliefs.

    • @God.sDaughter
      @God.sDaughter 3 года назад +77

      YES! YES! YES! YES!
      You’re absolutely correct!
      There are women who hate seeing another woman progress in life because she didn’t have that opportunity to be her best in life so these type of women go around sabotaging and insulting other women whose life is different than hers.
      It’s internal misogyny.

    • @Onehottherapist
      @Onehottherapist 3 года назад +6

      This!!!

    • @katiebayliss9887
      @katiebayliss9887 3 года назад +45

      Or even women who don’t get married, there’s women with manchildren who make fun of single women

    • @Jason-eo1rh
      @Jason-eo1rh 3 года назад

      @@God.sDaughter The mad ramblings of a scared feminist.

  • @annepatton8727
    @annepatton8727 Месяц назад +11

    I'm 41 and not a mother by choice. I've been called selfish many, many times. I've been told that my life would be pointless, that no one would take care of me when I'm old...like nursing homes are bursting with thankful sons and daughters 24/7. I realized that NOT having the desire was the #1 indicator. I'm proud if my choice, I honestly do not care what people tell me anymore. My happiness depends on something else.

    • @LucareonVee
      @LucareonVee Месяц назад +6

      41 childfree man here. All the best. We’re making the right choice for ourselves. 😎🍻

  • @moonamoonz
    @moonamoonz Год назад +355

    Childfree today, childfree tomorrow, childfree forever ✊🏻 dont let kids ruin your freedom gals.

    • @LucareonVee
      @LucareonVee Год назад +35

      I say the same to men. A lot of us are childfree too. 😎🍻

    • @LucareonVee
      @LucareonVee Год назад +1

      @Asimpnamednutsack
      Still having trouble with “your” and “you’re?” Keep at it, honey. 😋

    • @LucareonVee
      @LucareonVee Год назад +8

      @Asimpnamednutsack
      Better. Now tell us how that makes any difference. 😘

    • @jhonklan3794
      @jhonklan3794 11 месяцев назад +3

      how shallow and patheric

    • @Circlecorpceo
      @Circlecorpceo 10 месяцев назад +6

      @@AliciaGonzalez-pk3mw How is that toxic?

  • @morningcoffee2471
    @morningcoffee2471 3 года назад +1709

    Having no children is better than being a bad parent.
    Have a child because you "want" one, not because you "can".

    • @yaoiblfan
      @yaoiblfan 3 года назад +6

      I agree.

    • @casstsj
      @casstsj 3 года назад +60

      But also make sure that you can support a child even when you want one :)

    • @mrsbigmamayas3765
      @mrsbigmamayas3765 3 года назад +2

      👏👏👏👏👏👏👏

    • @mrsbigmamayas3765
      @mrsbigmamayas3765 3 года назад +4

      @@casstsj 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏

    • @vsevolodi.5373
      @vsevolodi.5373 3 года назад +1

      would you rather be dead or have a bad parent?

  • @NESherv
    @NESherv 3 года назад +2378

    "What are you gonna do when you're old and alone?"
    "Whatever I want! _That's_ what I'll do!"
    😂

    • @thrice302
      @thrice302 3 года назад +17

      🙁🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺

    • @neiya8862
      @neiya8862 3 года назад +9

      She means no one will be there to take care of you.

    • @NESherv
      @NESherv 3 года назад +125

      @@neiya8862 Well, that's a valid point too I suppose. But that reason in itself sounds kind of selfish, doesn't it?

    • @folded_pizza
      @folded_pizza 3 года назад +128

      Why does everyone assume we'll be alone when we're old? Quite a few of my female friends don't want kids, so we'll just party together. I'm 19 and don't have kids, am I alone? No, I have my friends, I have my family, other people may have a significant other, children aren't the only people that count as not being alone.

    • @cb4664
      @cb4664 3 года назад +4

      Amen! Just like now! 😀

  • @alainacommander2657
    @alainacommander2657 3 месяца назад +22

    Choosing not to kids is NOT selfish!😡

  • @hannahgraceoutdoors
    @hannahgraceoutdoors 3 месяца назад +20

    Chosing to not have kids is so far from being selfish. For me i feel the world is over populated and there are so many children in care who need a family. I dont want to birth my own child but would love to adopt, and have known that since a teenager.

  • @adorableonyourvanity
    @adorableonyourvanity 3 года назад +9617

    Most people shouldn’t have kids. Yet they do. Too many actually. That’s the biggest tragedy in the world.

    • @emanuelegrassivaro1899
      @emanuelegrassivaro1899 3 года назад +267

      The real tragedy is that our society makes children look like objects, we all have been kids once and having to see that an innocent creature is deemed as a tragedy is absolutely bad to say.

    • @lavenderlover5549
      @lavenderlover5549 3 года назад +304

      Keystone_XONE I think what the person is trying to say is that there I many people in the world that are having kids but don’t care to take the responsibility of having one, and then the kid ends up not having the proper care. It’s not the child itself that’s the tragedy, but’s it’s the suffering the kids has to go through when being taken care of by irresponsible people/parents that are having kids when they shouldn’t be that’s the tragedy

    • @adorableonyourvanity
      @adorableonyourvanity 3 года назад +146

      LaVeNdEr LoVeR thank you! Children are not the Problem, but people who procreate are.

    • @littlemissai8997
      @littlemissai8997 3 года назад +12

      i don't mind, kids are beautiful.

    • @hannahloew5027
      @hannahloew5027 3 года назад +25

      I love how we are discussing this on a deep level before I think people didnt think about it but now because of social media we can be honest

  • @commandZee
    @commandZee 3 года назад +2025

    I'm a 44 year old man, I don't have kids nor have I ever had the desire to. These women have the right to make the same decision without being shamed. A video like this shouldn't even be necessary in the 21st century.

    • @amazonqueen5694
      @amazonqueen5694 3 года назад +85

      first thank you for your respect and recognizing this as a choice for all

    • @arlo247
      @arlo247 3 года назад +86

      Amen brother. It’s real. That’s why feminism is still needed today!!! Humanitarian and feminism are one and the same truly!!!

    • @JJ-iq8mi
      @JJ-iq8mi 3 года назад +60

      Well said! I once got told that having a baby was my duty to society...despite the fact there are too many people in the world.

    • @sylwialesniak4335
      @sylwialesniak4335 3 года назад +28

      Feed me cheese This! Plus we never asked to be born so we don’t owe anything to the society

    • @doctorchloe505
      @doctorchloe505 3 года назад +14

      Thank you so much for seeing things from a woman’s perspective and being brave enough to be vocal about it. Lots of men are too ignorant and cowardly to do that.

  • @Circlecorpceo
    @Circlecorpceo 11 месяцев назад +34

    They are smart for not having kids.

  • @serenascaccia8180
    @serenascaccia8180 Год назад +100

    "Life has no purpose without kids" "You'll change your mind" "What will you do when you're 80?" "Not wanting children is NOT NORMAL" I hear these things every single day of my life because I have the fault that I don't want children....

    • @home_baked6891
      @home_baked6891 Год назад +27

      Me too... ppl need to mind their own businesses.. any woman is entitled to give no explanation to such stoopid and personal questions..

    • @chocolateprincess8543
      @chocolateprincess8543 Год назад +1

      Exactly, every woman doesn’t want to have kids and they’re not going to do so.

    • @subtlesigns
      @subtlesigns Год назад +27

      "life has no purpose without kids" - um, maybe to a BORING PERSON!

    • @LPanastasia
      @LPanastasia Год назад +6

      ​@@subtlesigns I'm stealing this dude

  • @roaringwithexcitement1329
    @roaringwithexcitement1329 3 года назад +2163

    Why do so many people take offense to childlessness? It doesn't hurt anyone.

    • @alexalson645
      @alexalson645 3 года назад +384

      Misery loves company. 🤷‍♂️

    • @roaringwithexcitement1329
      @roaringwithexcitement1329 3 года назад +10

      @Frank T , read the comments.

    • @Zeverinsen
      @Zeverinsen 3 года назад +332

      They feel like it's a personal attack on their choice to have kids, even though child free people don't care.

    • @gta4haterhq
      @gta4haterhq 3 года назад +9

      Yes it does, your legacy go's to the shiter.

    • @roaringwithexcitement1329
      @roaringwithexcitement1329 3 года назад +289

      @@gta4haterhq , legacy means nothing

  • @gena5270
    @gena5270 3 года назад +513

    My mom keeps telling me that no man will ever want me because i dont want kids. What makes you think I would want a man that wants kids?

    • @God.sDaughter
      @God.sDaughter 3 года назад +48

      Don’t listen to her. You’ll get a loving caring man and you two will live happily ever after.

    • @lonestar4374
      @lonestar4374 3 года назад +39

      Besides, there's alot of men who don't want kids,so doesn't sound to smart of her,in my opinion.

    • @dojacat5951
      @dojacat5951 3 года назад +17

      Lol women with kids aren’t very logical

    • @judy7276
      @judy7276 3 года назад +26

      My mum said exactly the same! She was so wrong! My gorgeous fiancee is 15 years younger and we totally adore each other.

    • @ladychatelaine697
      @ladychatelaine697 3 года назад +1

      Lol...exactly! 🙋‍♀️🙂🇬🇧

  • @BologneseJones
    @BologneseJones 8 месяцев назад +15

    Child free woman ..who has super duper friends..i had cancer 3 times each time my friends helped me.. in the cancer center i had married women tell me friends did more than their grown kids did. Not dying alone with cats..my friends proved to me they got my back in a crisis

  • @Apricot90
    @Apricot90 10 месяцев назад +26

    There were hundreds of years when "non-behaving", authentic, beautiful, smart and individualistic women would be burned alive. Since then the mindset of most people hasn't changed much. They would love to see us childfree women burn again because they themselves never had the guts to stick to their own believes and principals and burst out of anger and jealousy.

    • @redredred8408
      @redredred8408 10 месяцев назад

      Would you consider leaving on a red lamp in the bedroom and an oval light in the office and seeing which burns out first after a longtime, doing an experiment?

    • @scipion34
      @scipion34 10 месяцев назад +6

      ​@@redredred8408 I have seen you and your alt accounts do this for the past year. Why do you spend your time 24/7 just trying to be wise/funny and not do something else?

    • @rammohan1991
      @rammohan1991 Месяц назад

      Please take your meds .

  • @chelseamiller5568
    @chelseamiller5568 3 года назад +2131

    Im 34 and don’t want kids and don’t even want to date people with children. So my dating profiles say “I don’t want kids and I’m sorry but I don’t want yours either”

    •  3 года назад +235

      You're a smart woman.

    • @alexandergapour1253
      @alexandergapour1253 3 года назад +32

      Why do single fathers date

    • @alfredoalcantar8691
      @alfredoalcantar8691 3 года назад +9

      Fact's

    • @solointheburbs
      @solointheburbs 3 года назад +56

      I have the same thing on my profile as well. Do you find you still have those with children still contacting you? That's ALL I get. I put it right at the beginning of my profile and I still get fathers contacting me.

    • @jip230
      @jip230 3 года назад +63

      @@solointheburbs ok, I thought I was the only woman who did this. And YES, I get single fathers who contact me all the time. I'm like, "why would you even consider someone who expressly stated that she doesn't want to date someone with kids?" I totally don't get it, but maybe more videos like this will help people better understand that if we don't have kids, we don't want yours

  • @nuclearwessels2078
    @nuclearwessels2078 3 года назад +1638

    I'm single, childfree, and happy. I cannot believe people shame women like me. Why not devote that energy to parents that abuse and neglect their children? They are more detrimental to society than ladies like us.

    • @juliakowalski548
      @juliakowalski548 3 года назад +100

      @James one of the women in the video literally just responded to your question.

    • @Lottedbruyn
      @Lottedbruyn 3 года назад +2

      You’re absolutely right.

    • @spillthetarot
      @spillthetarot 3 года назад +57

      @James l am 40 and l am still awating to change my mind ...

    • @l3l3Cakes
      @l3l3Cakes 3 года назад +48

      My mother gave me away at 5. She should have just aborted me -only terrible things happened after that

    • @YawaTsagli
      @YawaTsagli 3 года назад +30

      l3l3Cakes sorry you didn’t have a great experience. Sending you virtual hugs x

  • @TheProtagonist37
    @TheProtagonist37 10 месяцев назад +22

    "Not having kids is selfish."
    To who? The kids?

    • @yellowyellowyellow7894
      @yellowyellowyellow7894 10 месяцев назад

      The chemicals in the chemistry lab.

    • @MarxMuru
      @MarxMuru 10 месяцев назад +4

      @@yellowyellowyellow7894 hush kid.

    • @gasoline5071
      @gasoline5071 9 месяцев назад +1

      @@yellowyellowyellow7894those aren't people

  • @dinidavis5277
    @dinidavis5277 10 месяцев назад +23

    I am 32 with no kids and trust me i am happy coz of this one choice I made. I never like felt that I need a child to be happy, I am just happy the way I am.

  • @floffy2695
    @floffy2695 3 года назад +2527

    People forget that their children are actual humans that will grow up into a completely unique individual, and not just decorative pieces.

    • @IRINUK26
      @IRINUK26 3 года назад +149

      Yeah, most people see kids as babies, and then complain when they discover that their children are not an extension of themselves and can’t govern their life .OH, and the best , they shame people that don’t want kids for not choosing the same ..it is a validation of choices I think

    • @TheBunniechannel
      @TheBunniechannel 3 года назад +75

      A lot of people unfortunately want a project, protégé, mini-me. but it just doesnt go that way.

    • @lotuswolf1518
      @lotuswolf1518 3 года назад +38

      Exactly they're raising another person to compete in the rat race , defo ending my blood line , might adopt cause I believe kids in orphanages want a family or a proper house

    • @donnabenevientoismygothmom9535
      @donnabenevientoismygothmom9535 2 года назад +17

      @@lotuswolf1518 Same, my bloodline is a failure anyway.

    • @emmy4537
      @emmy4537 2 года назад +16

      Yeah. They’re not a mini you. They’re different people.

  • @hlog3902
    @hlog3902 3 года назад +1675

    Selfish? By not wanting to bring kids into this hellhole of a world?

    • @andressantamaria7991
      @andressantamaria7991 3 года назад +110

      I agree, I'm 38 and married. I honestly think that having kids is for selfish reasons sometimes. But not having kids is a very important and responsible thing to do.

    • @vanilla7266
      @vanilla7266 3 года назад +112

      honestly, flip the script. tell people that wanting kids is selfish, because how ethical is it really to raise a child in this world? how ethical is it to even raise a child when the only motivation is "because people wanted me to"? how ethical is it to make your own child when so many go uncared for? lots of ammo to fight back with.

    • @jononwheelz
      @jononwheelz 3 года назад +23

      I don't take that nihilist view but I do think that having kids is just as selfish. Coming from someone is considering having kids, I see nothing wrong with being "selfish", as long as it is a responsible choice.

    • @wanefelicia8779
      @wanefelicia8779 3 года назад +21

      Exactly..it is empathetic actually

    • @user-ty7iq8rv1k
      @user-ty7iq8rv1k 3 года назад +5

      Yes

  • @jenny395791
    @jenny395791 Год назад +62

    For those who think I'm selfish for not having kids: if you agree to take complete responsibility for all those unwanted babies out there, I'll bring life into the world! Enjoy!

    • @mrx-od3ji
      @mrx-od3ji Год назад +13

      i agree jennifer sheppard i dont want kids too and i made that choice over 20 years ago and in 42 years old.

  • @seaofcolour7431
    @seaofcolour7431 4 месяца назад +17

    Women should never be compelled to have children but be allowed to follow their passion. Also, the world’s population is the highest it’s ever been with all the negative consequences of pollution, unaffordable housing and impact on the environment. Society’s standard of living was always higher when the population was lower.

  • @RC093
    @RC093 3 года назад +3357

    Having kids is not a life obligation, it's a personal choice, not everyone has the desire to be a parent. I sure know that my wife and I are happy with our lives without children. It's okay not to have children and there shouldn't be such a huge stigma to the subject.

    • @z0mbi3btch88
      @z0mbi3btch88 3 года назад +103

      Sometimes women or girls don't have a choice. . sadly. .

    • @limitess9539
      @limitess9539 3 года назад +244

      @Daniel Rumbacher then go make 5 kids and have fun with your new mega hectic life

    • @MelaninsFinest
      @MelaninsFinest 3 года назад +177

      Daniel Rumbacher then go have 8 and deal with 8 wardrobes, 8+ mouths to feed, 8 mfs to get ready for school, 8 mf cars, 8 mf college tuitions like bye😂😂

    • @memyselfandimom
      @memyselfandimom 3 года назад +8

      True I agree.. But does your wife really feel that way? I know when I was younger I didn't want children but the moment I got with my husband I knew I wanted children with him.

    • @snehasuresh5680
      @snehasuresh5680 3 года назад +197

      @@memyselfandimom Because you want children, they don't. Children are not the most important part of someone's relationship. One can have an amazing and fulfilling relationship without a need for kids. Having children drains you mentally, physically and financially. It is a decision you consciously make, you don't rush to it. And some people don't think that is important and that is totally okay.

  • @Revenant-jv7dm
    @Revenant-jv7dm 3 года назад +2080

    Kudos to these ladies. There’s too many women who have kids just to conform.

    • @mediabreak1993
      @mediabreak1993 3 года назад +15

      @Eugene Fisher exactly and am sure these lady's have there reasons

    • @z0mbi3btch88
      @z0mbi3btch88 3 года назад +14

      @Eugene Fisher Or single fathers taking care of the mothers kid cause she left ..

    • @intellectualshepherdsclub6708
      @intellectualshepherdsclub6708 3 года назад +3

      Where are such women? America's birthrates are pretty awful. So I don't know if there are a lot of women having children.

    • @VinnyLam
      @VinnyLam 3 года назад +59

      I agree. There are too many women who have kids for selfish reasons, like wanting to pass on their genes or family name.

    • @intellectualshepherdsclub6708
      @intellectualshepherdsclub6708 3 года назад +5

      @@VinnyLam How is that selfish? It's better than letting your family history die out.

  • @Attackatyourownrisk
    @Attackatyourownrisk 8 месяцев назад +25

    Everyone has their own opinion on this topic. Wanting to be child free is not selfish. Especially if you were forced to take care of your siblings children while being a child yourself. I spent my later teen years taking care of children. And it lasted till I got in my mid 20s. I can honestly say that I am truly blessed to be child free. Life is hard, there are a lot of people who are just evil for no reason at all, bullies and all. No way would I ever want my child to go through what I went through and what I am currently experiencing. That would be unfair.

  • @chillvibed
    @chillvibed Год назад +22

    Why are people still having kids? The price of everything keeps going up. Until it reverses, no kids 🤷‍♂️

  • @amberlee4536
    @amberlee4536 3 года назад +2383

    People: "NEVER HAVE KIDS"
    Me: "oh I won't"
    People: "I mean you might change your mind..."
    Me: ????

    • @tararoselawson6941
      @tararoselawson6941 3 года назад +49

      Oml my mom says the exact same thing drives me crazy

    • @onion5008
      @onion5008 3 года назад +72

      My mom has 4 kids and none of us want kids just cause they made us feel like a burden all our lives

    • @ciera_danyel
      @ciera_danyel 3 года назад +8

      Me. Daily.

    • @RosemaryTurner2002
      @RosemaryTurner2002 3 года назад +6

      I’ve actually had this said to me before 🤦🏽‍♀️

    • @MarlenyCruz
      @MarlenyCruz 3 года назад +5

      Yep ... I am like really .I say to be prepared to a have kid that is completely opposite what you want out a kid.

  • @DM57262
    @DM57262 3 года назад +817

    Although I love kids. I have many reasons I don’t want any.
    1. I plan on spending a lot of time traveling.
    2. Kids are extremely expensive.
    3. The majority of people with kids look worn out and unhappy.
    4. Extra responsibility I don’t want.
    5. I have a career that I love and don’t want kids I can’t spend enough time with.
    6. The world is too messed up and evil.
    7. I love my sleep and time to myself.
    8. Kids put a huge strain on marriages and relationships. This is a fact.
    9. In case I were to divorce, I wouldn’t want to be a single mom. This is my worst fear.
    10. I just don’t have a lot of patience.
    11. Childbirth looks horrifying.

  • @ztimpatpatpat6608
    @ztimpatpatpat6608 7 месяцев назад +21

    Nah. I dont want to bring a child into this world. In my life experience. Family is not there for you through your struggles and pain. What is the point of creating one.
    I will never get it.

    • @tacoexpressSEEDEEholeeveryones
      @tacoexpressSEEDEEholeeveryones 7 месяцев назад

      danny reflection on the ceiling

    • @igors1234
      @igors1234 7 месяцев назад +1

      Family is the only thing that would support you through your struggles and pain. Maybe it's just your family in which members don't care about each other. It's normal that during evolution different individuals get different traits, and one traits are able to survive and pass their genes further, others are not, and you are from the second category. Selfishness is obviously a downgraded extinctive trait.

  • @imapisces0308
    @imapisces0308 2 года назад +25

    Women who say they don’t want kids are usually some of the best aunties/godmoms. Because they have love to give but they know it’s not what they want 24/7. It’s so many kids in the world who aren’t wanted while these women are upfront knowing this isn’t the life they want. I love it

  • @windflowerrainstorm6497
    @windflowerrainstorm6497 3 года назад +2473

    No one EVER asks a man why he doesn't want kids

    • @MyRedmamba
      @MyRedmamba 3 года назад +132

      I think it's because men have more time to decide than women. If a woman wants to have one she needs to get cracking at it by the time She is in her late 30s to early 40s. Men can usually wait until their 50s or 60s before the possibility of issues.

    • @MRuby-qb9bd
      @MRuby-qb9bd 3 года назад +156

      They definitely will if he's married. But even single women get this question from people.
      The only time it's a reasonable question is from a romantic or prospective romantic partner, because that's a necessary conversation. But jeezus the random old ladies asking about this gah!

    • @WILL-vi5gb
      @WILL-vi5gb 3 года назад +38

      because you're looking for a double standard that doesn't exist, women have always been valued and protected for their ability to produce kids
      why do you think it's more tragic when a woman dies than a man?

    • @camillefaith2005
      @camillefaith2005 3 года назад +224

      WILL dude it’s not more tragic for a woman to die then a man. That’s completely subjective. Men really want oppression points so bad. 😂

    • @kristiyanadelcheva531
      @kristiyanadelcheva531 3 года назад +182

      In my opinion it's a bigger sacrifice to become a mother than a father... a sacrifice with your body and mental health.. there is this thing called postpartum depression.. at the end of the day mainly the mother is the one who takes care of the baby/kid.. her life could completely change and there's not much of a free time.. her days are occupied with it while the father still goes to work and has time on their own etc

  • @lizmasi9918
    @lizmasi9918 3 года назад +2606

    I'm 66. Never regretted not having kids.

    • @MyName-cw4yr
      @MyName-cw4yr 3 года назад +85

      I guess your cats can keep you company.

    • @CloroxBleach-dy9jw
      @CloroxBleach-dy9jw 3 года назад +315

      @@MyName-cw4yr shut up

    • @thasright7067
      @thasright7067 3 года назад +259

      @@MyName-cw4yr
      Anything wrong with that?

    • @lizmasi9918
      @lizmasi9918 3 года назад +124

      @@Raniambiance at 26 I had a four month period that I had where I wanted a baby. The mood passed and I wanted not to have children after that.

    • @lizmasi9918
      @lizmasi9918 3 года назад +139

      @@MyName-cw4yr never had cats.

  • @YY-ei1gm
    @YY-ei1gm 12 дней назад +5

    I’m 50. Zero regrets. I have mothered so many people in my life and taken care of so many people many lived with me. No regrets

  • @Fandar
    @Fandar 2 года назад +101

    If men aren't looked down upon for not wanting children, neither should women.

  • @srami004
    @srami004 3 года назад +1950

    Just because one can have children doesn't mean that one should. Not everyone is fit to be a parent.

    • @PointNemo9
      @PointNemo9 3 года назад +8

      When facing an ageing population this message is irresponsible

    • @Ikajo
      @Ikajo 3 года назад +142

      @@PointNemo9 The Earth is overpopulated. Bringing more children into the world is what's irresponsible.

    • @jasonvolta3657
      @jasonvolta3657 3 года назад +3

      Yeah, ask those young women when they are in their 60s. You may hear very different story.

    • @Ikajo
      @Ikajo 3 года назад +104

      @@jasonvolta3657 They are generally still very happy with their decision. Childfree isn't that new of a concept. There are women in their 60s and older who are perfectly happy with their choice. You don't need to have children to be happy.

    • @MarxMuru
      @MarxMuru 3 года назад +72

      @@PointNemo9 its irresponsible to bring children into world just so they could lower the median age of population.

  • @katiaaoox
    @katiaaoox 3 года назад +2365

    I don’t want kids. Never did and never will. People don’t like that as a woman i don’t want to reproduce but for some reason, no one questions men for not wanting kids. The double standard is disgusting

    • @Eternalbleedingheartsclub
      @Eternalbleedingheartsclub 3 года назад +272

      Or they undermine women's choices by saying things like "oh you will someday" "oh you just haven't met the right guy yet" - listen Karen I don't want kids!!

    • @jmw8004
      @jmw8004 3 года назад +166

      Agreed. My wife and I decided against children years ago, and she has gotten way more grief about it than I have. Not fair.

    • @rushrush1209
      @rushrush1209 3 года назад +37

      Plenty of people also give the stink eye to men for not wanting kids. I agree that there's more pressure on women to have kids.

    • @Fan-zx1lz
      @Fan-zx1lz 3 года назад +1

      @@rushrush1209 Yes.

    • @Fan-zx1lz
      @Fan-zx1lz 3 года назад +3

      @wattlesong Everyone is not like that

  • @gracesanity6314
    @gracesanity6314 2 месяца назад +10

    Children will never make you happy. People are always expecting that to happen...never does. That l BELEAVE is a huge part of postpartum depression. The reality hits.

  • @brandonwhiting7229
    @brandonwhiting7229 Год назад +26

    bringing children into the world is the worst thing you can ever do, to curse someone with life.....especially with life during these precarious times.

  • @abeerabugharbiya3545
    @abeerabugharbiya3545 3 года назад +3718

    I’m 55 with no kids. I took this decision when I was 14 and I have no regrets. I adore children but I never wanted my own.

    • @STMARTIN009
      @STMARTIN009 3 года назад +217

      I am a 40 year old man. I guess I just like my freedom to do what I want outside of work too much and the financial stress would be too much to deal with.

    • @lotuswolf1518
      @lotuswolf1518 3 года назад +101

      I decided not to have kids when I turned 23 and pandemic started , I had to compete and struggle to make ends meet also I still live with my parents alot of people in India do ,I have always wanted to adopt a kid

    • @bernardodelcarlo6704
      @bernardodelcarlo6704 3 года назад +102

      I’m 26. I didn’t want kids since i was 13

    • @juanpedro4083
      @juanpedro4083 3 года назад +190

      I do not want to have children, the world is not easy and everything indicates that it will only get worse. I don't want to put a child in the world to suffer.

    • @lotuswolf1518
      @lotuswolf1518 3 года назад +41

      @@juanpedro4083 exactly , I wouldn't do that either

  • @sarahfranz4758
    @sarahfranz4758 3 года назад +867

    I do not want kids either. I get tired of hearing “oh youll change your mind”. No one says that to people who want children...

    • @guhhihhihhuhununununnjiji249
      @guhhihhihhuhununununnjiji249 3 года назад +6

      Sarah Franz they probably say that because your parents want grand babies😊 And the reason ppl don’t say “you’ll change your mind” to kids who what babies is because that’s the norm. Ppl grow up and eventually have kids🤷🏾‍♂️

    • @lilithssilvermoon3208
      @lilithssilvermoon3208 3 года назад +8

      Sarah Franz I’m with you! I just hope that since you know this, you’re taking responsibility to NOT get pregnant? That’s a choice too

    • @stardustnation2480
      @stardustnation2480 3 года назад +1

      Because it's a biological prerogative to reproduce

    • @blancaaaaaaa
      @blancaaaaaaa 3 года назад +18

      @@stardustnation2480 Im pretty sure she doesn't have to have kids if she doesn't want to . Imagine being raise by a mother that never wanted you but was forced to have you because of pressure .

    • @Opheliakami
      @Opheliakami 3 года назад +9

      @@stardustnation2480 it's more of a choice.

  • @CosyAnaa
    @CosyAnaa Месяц назад +10

    Childfree women wont d!e alone, they will have their partner (if married/dating) friends, family by there side. Not having kids can teach you to be by yourself and not be dependent on your kids when they get older.

  • @gogicbasic7629
    @gogicbasic7629 Год назад +14

    I am a 37-year-old man and my wife is 40. We are a childfree couple. I am the only child in the family, my wife has an older sister who is married and they are also in a childfree marriage. We all have other life priorities, desires... We live the best lives, we like to go out, we like to travel, we like to sleep a lot, we like to spend our money on fun, luxurious things that we can afford because we don't have children, we just enjoy life. And we NEVER once wanted kids. We don't want to destroy our best lives.

  • @rachaelthrasher9642
    @rachaelthrasher9642 3 года назад +582

    “She’s too young, she can’t possibly know her mind” I hate when I hear this.

    • @katiebayliss9887
      @katiebayliss9887 3 года назад +30

      But she’s not too old to keep a kid

    • @willx1598
      @willx1598 3 года назад +18

      Age doesn't matter when it comes to decisional maturity, you see alot of older people making bad decisions

    • @JennaJunipers
      @JennaJunipers 3 года назад +23

      26 y/o woman doesn’t want kids: “Oh you’re still young, you’ll change your mind!”
      16 y/o gets pregnant: “Oh my gosh isn’t she so mature!”
      🙄

    • @SubliminalQueen368
      @SubliminalQueen368 3 года назад +11

      They think we’re too young to decide to not have kids, but old enough to have and care for kids.

    • @mimesthaisilva8321
      @mimesthaisilva8321 3 года назад +4

      “You’ll regret it one day.” I haven’t , because the reasons stood throughout time, and I knew they would.

  • @paulinemalone205
    @paulinemalone205 3 года назад +1756

    I just wish we didn’t have to justify our decision over and over even to complete strangers

    • @paulinemalone205
      @paulinemalone205 3 года назад +125

      Natasel wow. People have no problem asking straight out “do you have kids”, ‘why not”. Because it’s none of their business to ask why not.

    • @sliceoflime4735
      @sliceoflime4735 3 года назад +58

      Ugh...tell me about it.
      Also, I have noticed women that have kids are taken more seriously in a social gathering, their opinions are respected more, even if they are way younger n inexperienced.

    • @RealMexFoodShouldntGiveUDrrhea
      @RealMexFoodShouldntGiveUDrrhea 3 года назад +14

      You literally don’t. ‘Cause I don’t anymore. I just leave people hanging. 🤣

    • @ubuntuber1619
      @ubuntuber1619 3 года назад +7

      adoption should be encouraged from different races, this way racism and world population crisis both will be checked.

    • @lilithssilvermoon3208
      @lilithssilvermoon3208 3 года назад +5

      Pauline Malone you don’t 🤷🏼‍♀️that’s a choice too!

  • @allisonhughes5812
    @allisonhughes5812 2 года назад +38

    As someone who has always dreamed of being a mom, I have nothing but admiration for these women!! They are definitely not selfish! It’s so amazing that we all have unique gifts to contribute to the world 💕

  • @MsLunachu
    @MsLunachu 11 месяцев назад +16

    If I were to have a child, I would likely neglect that child, because I know I simply don’t have the capacity to raise another human being while also guiding myself through my own life. And I have no desire to do so

  • @lucaslouzada44
    @lucaslouzada44 3 года назад +2768

    The people who’d better educate children prefere to have cats and dogs, while those who can’t even take care of plants are having children...

    • @intellectualshepherdsclub6708
      @intellectualshepherdsclub6708 3 года назад +72

      Smart people don't have nearly as many children as dumb people. Sounds like more of a smart people problem. If you really cared that much, maybe you would've had kids.

    • @eurekamreum5458
      @eurekamreum5458 3 года назад +120

      I'm sorry but that's none of their business. They shouldn't feel forced to have kids just because they'd be great parents.

    • @redvelvetcakeYUM
      @redvelvetcakeYUM 3 года назад +8

      It’s “the crazies” running the insane asylum.

    • @isaccarvalho2652
      @isaccarvalho2652 3 года назад +8

      You nailed it 👏🏽

    • @Nelindah
      @Nelindah 3 года назад +56

      Never underestimate less educated women for being mothers. Sometimes they are smarter, tough fighters and don't forget there are succesful person who raised by mothers who never enter school buildings.

  • @nkolemwaba2526
    @nkolemwaba2526 3 года назад +1553

    Some of the most abusive child hating people have kids.

    • @yoleeisbored
      @yoleeisbored 3 года назад +21

      Chris Watts.. rest in peace to the kids and their mother..

    • @iamtheruraljuror9257
      @iamtheruraljuror9257 3 года назад +142

      My mom said the most toxic words to us, but appear nice in front of her friends.. She wonders why all her children has mental health issues.

    • @Adele5554
      @Adele5554 3 года назад +26

      @@iamtheruraljuror9257 Just tell her friends, infront of her, what a bad mother she is. She'll probably stop being two faced then.

    • @treasuretea3549
      @treasuretea3549 3 года назад +5

      All those poor kids 😭

    • @julissa3905
      @julissa3905 3 года назад +5

      Yuuupp, my mom had 8

  • @lavendersprig2905
    @lavendersprig2905 8 месяцев назад +20

    I hardly have time for my own life . I don’t need kids and I hate babies .

    • @fairy12324
      @fairy12324 8 месяцев назад +3

      I understand being child free and am a mum. But the hatred towards an infant is rather odd. I think that's a disturbing thought process

    • @LucareonVee
      @LucareonVee 8 месяцев назад +5

      @@fairy12324
      How so? They smell, they cry, they drool…

    • @fairy12324
      @fairy12324 8 месяцев назад

      @@LucareonVee odd

    • @LucareonVee
      @LucareonVee 8 месяцев назад +4

      @@fairy12324
      Odd how? It’s true. 😋

    • @limelimelime7818
      @limelimelime7818 8 месяцев назад

      @@LucareonVeetrue LAMP BOUNCE HOUSE you mean