The TRUTH about being Muslim in corporate America
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- Опубликовано: 5 июл 2024
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Not Muslim but have had Muslim coworkers and or coworkers that needed a private place to pray. I work in construction and I'm the first aid person. If you need a prayer space ask the first aid person if you can use the first aid room. These rooms are clean, private, rarely used and ppl should not enter without knocking so ppl won't barge in on you. Get to know the first aid person at your job site and see if this is ok with them. I felt honored when ppl asked me cuzz it ment ppl though my first aid room was safe and i felt like i was helping :)
You are amazing, thank you ❤
thank you dear may god bless you ❤❤
I’m a revert Muslim and I worked for my father’s company and whenever I had to pray I would go into my dads office and he would get up and leave for me to pray I’m so grateful mashallah that I had that.
That's so messed up about the prayer stuff. My mom worked as an HR director for years and by law in our state you need a room for breastfeeding but Muslim coworkers started using it for prayer and they asked my mom if they could keep their rugs and Qurans in there, and of course she said yes. It was never even an issue. I don't understand why someone wouldn't allow that?
I am not a Muslim, and I don't have any religious or personal reservations against drinking or after work festivities. However, I think it is in poor form for those who occupy supervisory or managerial positions to partake in those activities because it could skew their opinion in favor of employees who choose to attend those events with them, at the expense of those who don't. If someone in position of authority is to maintain his or her objectivity, they should not fraternize with their subordinates.
I just don't want to attend further work activities bc I'm exhausted from work.
@@MC-fw5vt also who wants to see the same ppl you see for 40 hours a week after work also?
@@ye23.I actually don't mind that just as long as I get paid for it or the company is paying for the meals or drinks or whatever.
Time is money so if they want more than the 40hrs in my contract, they need to give me some compensation. Simple 🤷🏾♂️
I’m a grad student in Canada and still relate to a lot of this. So much of the culture of academia is also tied to alcohol, and atheism. I’ve been wondering whether the atheistic character is unique to academia, or whether people in other career paths also notice this. Thanks for sharing your experience ✨
I think people are way more vocal about it in academia. In my experience a lot of the older generations who are CEOs can be religious/conservative (europe persceptive)
Why is the culture of academia in Muslim countries tied to islam and muslim politics??
@@cuteyrahul depends what muslim country you talk about and how more or less religious they are i guess. also the field obv
@@fatine name one Muslim country where academia is not vastly captured by muslims and islamic influence
@@cuteyrahul my country morocco for example. unless you go into islamic studies, it's actually pretty secular. i remember in university when professors even forbade us from using certain islamic designs or bringing up stuff like mosques or prayer rooms. as a matter of fact we didnt even have a prayer room in school
Love your vids!! Obv I'm not through the vid yet but I can already relate! I'm Jewish, not really religious, but I do try to keep kosher adjacent which can get really difficult especially when eating out with people. I grew up in a "post war" esk home (my dad was silent gen.) where you don't say a word about being Jewish. No candles near windows, you might secretly wish someone a happy holiday or w/e if you happened to find out, etc. A lot of our culture has gotten erased outside of isolated pockets and it's so difficult to hang onto it. I've also noticed a lack of respect for other cultures vs religions funny enough. As soon as I put on a tichel or use a bit too much Yiddish I'm immediately asked about religious aspects which is fine, happy to educate. But when I don't have religion behind me I get some really weird looks since ppl can't understand that you have Jewish people with different ethnicities and cultures (I'm Ashkenazi) who happen to share Judaism... idk it's weird. I def. relate to most of this (especially as I embrace more visual aspects of my culture) and I can't tell you how many times I've given up on enforcing Jewish culture e.g. working past sunset on Shabbat/ holidays, working on Sat., etc. Heck, I never got to actually sit shiva when my dad passed.. I'm working at not giving in so much but habits die hard!
Listening to your story about being yelled about going home early and skipping lunch made me so much more thankful for never having issues for starting early (after suhoor), working without lunch, and going home super early.
As a recent revert, I celebrated my first Ramadan this past year and fasted. But my manager organized brunch outing during that month. I told her how I wasn't sure if I would be able to go bc I would be fasting, and she literally said, "Well it's important to have opportunities together for team-building". Like you want me to abandon my religious commitment for team building??? And I live in Australia too, and the drinking culture is sooo bad here, even worse than Canada (where I'm from).
I literally just posted a comment about being in australia with the huge drinking culture here. Thankfully my coworkers are respectful during ramadan. but when its not ramadan they always want to meet for drinks after work and if you dont go youre seen as being antisocial
Try being a Christian or atheist in any muslim country, it's easy being white muslim in some western secular democracy
I’m a muslim Arab in Canada and I felt this in my soul. “Where are you from?” Is no longer a microagression lol. Class unity/solidarity is definitely the answer though. I’m happy you mentioned the strikes. Labour rights are where we’ll find these accommodations for religious practices because having to negotiate them with your boss and their whims is stupid.
Why be so touchy on with being asked where you are from? I've lived in other countries where I was a visible minority and was constantly asked where I was from, and I thought it nice that people cared and it was always a good convo, certainly not a "micro-aggression."
@@MC-fw5vt because people always like to assume that you are from MENA for some reason when in actuality most Muslims aren’t Arab. It is racist because they can’t fathom that there are Muslims who are white from Europe or NA. And this isn’t the only thing. They assume you speak bad English and they seem to purposely not pronounce your name properly even though they are easy simple names, even after correcting them.
I ask people where they are from because I am interested/making conversation. I never mean it aggressively... if I want to be aggressive I'll be rude or I'll ignore you.
@@lauragarnham77 You are absolutely correct. I am Pakistani and I am often interested to hear where others come from since I love learning about different cultures and peoples. In California I always ask people about their background and I love it when people ask me about my background. After we are all humans with our own stories and I enjoy engaging people. Unfortunately I find that people who are self conscious and not comfortable with themselves are easily triggered if you ask them about their background or where they come from. It's their problem and you just need to understand that some people are super sensitive and walk around with a chip on their shoulder. I just ignore those type of people - Muslim or otherwise. We live in a politically correct world where things have just gone too far where everything is considered an insult or a microaggression.
I think it can go both ways and the difference is in intent/perceived intent when asking the question. I've gotten the question from people who are genuinely interested, or perhaps hoping to find common ground, and that's always lovely. I've also had people ask like they don't believe you belong in the country you live in. Makes a world of difference, so I think it's best to be open to having friendly conversations but understand that it doesn't mean you have to accept nasty behaviour.
I'm sorry to hear about your experience, Tazzy. If it counts for anything, my company made me (as a new hire) go to sensitivity training and used the example of a Muslim during Ramadan rejecting a happy hour invitation. There seemed to be a real push to be mindful of all religions and cultures in the workplace, and hopefully we can see this continued in the coming years.
As a convert, I’ve found that people respect if you claim that you don’t drink because you are a former alcoholic. They won’t push that matter further. You may have to lie but it works. It does say a lot about American culture though. You may have to fall really low for them to respect you.
This is why I think a course in comparative religion should be compulsory in schools. It would foster greater understanding of the differences in practices between people of different faiths. That way, when these kids enter the workforce, it will not be a shock when they hear about their coworker fasting for Ramadan, or their Hindu coworker abstaining from meat, or their Catholic coworker having the sign of the cross, made of ash, on their head on one particular Wednesday of the year. Before those who are vociferous advocates of the Constitution say this violates church state separation, keep in mind that this clause in the Constitution prohibits the endorsement or prohibition a religious practice by the government. Teaching about the various religions is not the same as endorsing a religion, in the same way that teaching about various forms of slavery in history class is not an endorsement of slavery.
I went to a Catholic school in Canada (specifically in Ontario), and for grade 10, our religion class was solely about world religions. It was one of my favourite courses, and the textbook was really well written for people who are new to religions. We skipped the Christianity chapter for obvious reasons lol I definitely advocate it for any school, private, public, or otherwise! When you learn about the world religions, the holidays become much more fun and I was able to have more detailed and curious questions for co-workers who are excited to celebrate theirs on their days off. It's such a joyful thing to understand other people's joyful occasions.
The praying in the bathroom suggestion KILLED ME LOL
I can commiserate on a couple of these from different angles.
I do not drink (just by choice) and OMG do I abhor how much things have to be tied to alcohol. The US as a whole is way to alcohol happy.
"Skipping" lunch. I did that for years at a company and got in trouble. For a while we had kind of a compromise where I just took my lunch at the end of the day but it meant I still had to stay there doing nothing for an hour.
I love this video and this is so relatable. I am a first gen in the US and it has been tough trying to confidently demand for accommodations that others would very easily and naturally ask for. Recently I started working at a new place and was so nervous trying to ask for a place to pray, till I finally decided, heck. If Kyleigh could easily ask for a room to meditate, I can ask for a room to pray. I was nonchalant about it and to my surprise they were very nice about it. It’s time for people to get used to muslims praying in the workplace and to offer accommodations. Hugh fan and love u so muchhhh keep it up love ❤❤
The bathroom HAH. Oh my God people have no idea. Your anecdotes always make me laugh.
The drinking culture in the UK is also huge unfortunately so I can totally relate. Thankfully I've not experienced racism or Islamaphobia in work having mostly worked in diverse British cities. Of course, you occasionally get strange questions or the odd ignorant thankfully harmless remark.
What I would say is that having a lack of brown or Muslim people in senior leadership positions makes it challenging to progress because of concious or unconcious biases when it comes to promotion opportunities and interviews but more and more progressive organisations are providing training to address this.
On another note I tried Ramadan in a Muslim village (Indonesia) for the first time this year and it was the most beautiful experience - you have to try it! Everybody is up all night, you hear Qur'an and children playing on the streets.
Im in australia and also a big drinking culture here. All they want to do after work or to “catch up” is to have drinks. Im often times the only person not drinking. If you don’t attend you’re seen as being antisocial, not a team player, etc.
Yeah the happy hour is to inform you that the job is evil and you shouldn't associate with those people. Try suggesting a nice cafe and that dosen't fly start sending those resumes out. Also look into worker co-ops. You have a lot more power to negotiate in a co-op.
Love this video! So much insight, and shows how much change and educating corporate America needs.
Just in case anyone was curious, employment laws are state-to-state. Idaho doesnt require breaks or lunches but Oregon does, for example.
Thanks for expressing your thoughts and opinions on this topic. It seems as though workplace culture can be problematic.
I once worked at a cleanroom factory that had enough Muslims working there that they had fully built-out ablution stations in the bathrooms, but they couldn't figure out how to accommodate prayers. It took like 5-10 minutes to dress out and another 5-10 to dress back in (full body coverings with shoe covers/gloves/mask, so quite a lot to deal with), so the managers didn't like the employees leaving to use the mediation room or whatever because production blah blah, but their best solution to that was to have the employees just sitting in regular chairs in the cleanroom. Not even "here's some tarps on the floor," just "idk sitting down is the same thing as kneeling right? we sit down at church, what's the big deal?" just ?????????? how had this not been fully resolved by the time the ablution stations got built out with their custom plumbing and all that ???????? ya can't just... ask the Muslim employees what would work for them ??????
Always helps to hear from different angles thank you for this video. It's really informative and thoughtful. And I'm sorry office culture sucks so bad.
New mothers are (by law) supposed to be given a private space (not a bathroom) where they can pump breast milk while at work. You can ask your HR where this place would be, and use that space for prayer. So long as it’s not occupied by a mom, I really don’t see what the problem would be.
Jazak Allahu Khairan sister
Love your videos!
I also don't drink and I also resent obligations to attend after hours work events. They need to pay me if they want my time. I truly don't care what people think because I don't drink though.
I'm lucky that everyone at my job is pretty cool. One time one of my coworkers brought his dog to the office and he asked me if it was ok for the doggy to be around me since he knew some Muslims won't interact with dogs.
I usually duck into an unpopulated office of conference room to pray but I also have that weird nervousness that someone is going to walk in on me and just be confused about what I'm doing lol
As a person who is agnostic and doesn't drink, people still ask me: ' Why don't you drink? Is it for religious reasons? So you've never drank in your life?. Or they say things like: 'Oh maybe you just haven't found the right drink for you'. I get from my friends as well not just strangers.
I have to say that when you said “Beer” I actually for a moment thought you said “Bourbon” instead. I recently reverted and since becoming Muslim I haven’t seen the appeal of drinking as I once used to. I don’t want to be at the bar anymore simply because being in that setting or environment is something I don’t like to be in.
I don’t work in corporate but my supervisor was nice when he heard that I just became Muslim and will be fasting for Ramadan when it begins sometime later in the week. I made the wrong move by then telling the head boos that same thing. I could tell that she didn’t like the idea of me fasting. The next day (Tuesday) she approached me as though she was expecting me to pass out at any given moment asking if I was okay. I said that I was fine and then asked if everything was alright. She said about issues that can come with fasting. I then said that it hasn’t started yet and it will begin whenever the moon is sighted.
I still choose to fast every now and then outside of Ramadan.
Too relatable! Especially the “WhErE aRe YoU really FrOm” question 😒😒
Whenever people ask me "where I'm from" 9 out of 10 they are asking "why do you look like that".
11:30 “it’s a habeesh” LMAOOOO
This is crazy stuff😅, we’re not that bad here in London, well I’ve not experienced it , I work in very corporate financial companies however I think it’s the company you work for and their policies.
at my former corporate job i had a Muslim coworker and he thankfully was respected and never disturbed when he went to pray and was also respected during his fasting for Ramadan. but i don’t think this was normal in the sense that corporations don’t really accommodate to anyone. i am athiest but don’t drink with everyone. yeah a massive part of corporate life is the drinking culture and I would always get so much crap for never attending the “drink lunches or “happy hour.” that being said, no job is worth being pressured into drinking.
Article link?
God you're funny, like you're good with words and .. I don't know you just got it.
This applies to office culture in the UK too! Btw, it can't be comfortable holding that mic throughout the video?
Yes these strange little distracting mics are a trend right now. Can we all just go back to the clip-on mic wc worked fine ?
@@MC-fw5vt A trend? I must live under a rock. It is so distracting- I can only listen and not watch.
I wonder in this respect how (religious) minority treatment is in cooperations around the world. Surely it's individual, but also shaped by the mentality and culture of the country so I wish there was a series on this?
where you from? No where you really really from? Erks me every time!
Why Muslims cry about alcohol? I've never not once in my drunk beer and have no intention to do so. Not even a tad bit tempted. I could be surrounded by drunks and be unaffected.
The micro aggressive comments ALWAYS happened to me….. I hate working because of the people I worked with. Astaghfirullah
All those who complaining about corporate culture in Australia have never been part of Muslim corporate culture in Muslim countries
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80% of the time its a people problem your dealing with. Often times the manager makes the job more difficult then it has to be.
I look white-ish so untill I open my mouth I am safe from "where are you from" question. Even though I have lived most of my life in US when someone asks me where I am from I just say Iran. No further explanation. I don't say Washington DC. I don't say Iranian-American. I don't say US citizen. I just say Iran and look the person dead in their eyes. I am proudly from a different zip code and culture, next...
Good idea. Why make a big deal out of it. I do the same as a visible minority and it doesn't ruffle my feathers.
You have the beautiful olive -white skin not the haram pink pig tone skin of the blonde northern europe beasts
yea "happy hour" is a big deal lol i dont get it
Ahahahahahhahaah yes!!!
wow, i am the opposite of how you are , i spoke to Uber rides in LA about jummah, islam christianity and any chance of what is islam, salah, hijab i grab it with both hands like how else are you suppose to do dawah in a consumeristic, capitalistic, secular society
Then why live here ? Try Saudia or other Islamic states......that your parents probably fled from.
Such a double standard because if you say I am sober then people respect you, but if you’re Muslim that’s weird. Instead of praying just say you are manifesting or mediating; which is just a gentrified version of duaa.
I believe more and more how American culture are so ignorant about anything far from this belly button .
Love the color of your habij ❤
I don’t think religion should ever be commented or discussed at work by both religious and non religious people. I’ve been discriminated against by some religious people at work for being gay, on one occasion Christian and another occasion Muslim. So let’s be honest this judging goes on both ways. Leave your religion ( figuratively) at home and treat everyone as equal. Don’t interfere or comment about their personal lives and don’t impose atheist or religious views on each other. Find a common ground and stay FIRMLY FOCUSED and within it.
This is ignorant. If a colleague invites you for drinks and youre muslim its hard to not disclose the fact that you dont drink bcus youre muslim. You cant just ignore your faith entirely if its part of your identity. Another example a lot of times coworkers will wish me a happy christmas/easter and its like…thanks but i dont celebrate. They ask why. Of course you cant not disclose your religion in that instance. If you want ppl not to disclose their faith then how about we also not disclose sexuality?
@@ye23. if you don’t drink, say you don’t drink. You don’t have to say why. Out of politeness if a Muslim said Eid Mubarak , I would return the greeting and wish them a lovely day , rather than give a lecture about my personal beliefs. You just don’t have to keep justifying everything you do or don’t do down to your religion , the more you harp on about the more ammunition you give to others to single you out.
And just to add you could just say I’d rather go for a coffee than a drink. If people are rude it is on them. People don’t drink for all sorts of reasons. It’s not just you. And just to add my original comment was about imposing your personal views on others. What you do is your business , one bitch in my office said everyone should say “Christian name” instead of first name . That’s an example of imposing faith , if you started lecturing on a specific topic that would be the same type of situation, it’s unnecessary and I don’t need to know it
@@sashamellon822 « leave your religion at home ».
I think you’ll enjoy French Secularism haha.
I don’t know how Muslim communities act in UK and US.
For another point , being gay AND muslim is acceptable in your environment ?
Did you face pressure from your community ?
Discrimination is a big one. Just left a company with a bunch of Z1on1sts....yeah not fun.....im thankful that my job now is very inclusive, has locations specifically given to prayer times
Salam sister I want to marry you after watching your videos for 2 weeks I always think about you wondering ken day someone will marry you my crush it makes me sad 😢
Company woke culture is rampant… like my job had pride badges & pronoun tags to put on them… fine, whatever… gender neutral bathrooms… alright… wait, but men are entering woman’s restroom/shower & lockers now? I can’t fix my hijab & make wudu without worrying about my awra being exposed. Anyway… yeah being seen as rude for not shaking hands used to be something I worried about, now it’s least of my worries :/
I feel like religion isn’t as protected as someone’s sexuality… we don’t have fancy badges flashing around like, “I’m Muslim,” but I am considering making one of my own because I am tired of that being the only thing represented in the office… we are told to keep politics/religion/sexuality out of the work place but then they start making the sexuality thing so common place… like, I can’t practice my religion in peace & comfort, but go on about how diverse you must be… or they act like they are oppressed & yet if you disagree with them or forbid you ask a company to keep men out of the bathroom for religious reasons, jobs are lost & status is canceled… I’m lowkey afraid to speak up about this…
@@michp571 these sorts of comments are why queer people feel forced out of their religions. trans & queer people are nothing new and not some white american thing. this goes back hundreds if not thousands of years in cultures all across the planet - mahu, muxe, hijra, bakla, sworn virgins, two spirit, etc etc. the trans woman in the bathroom stall next to you is not your enemy. the trans man you apparently would rather have in your locker room is not your enemy either. trans women of color don't see their 30s because they keep being murdered. please target your energy at the real problem and not a minority that is being directly targeted and is struggling just as much as you.
@@michp571 also, the second you start saying "you don't look like enough of a woman to be in the women's room" etc, you actually start policing cisgender people's gender expression & gendered physical traits way more than you do trans people. and for those of us who are ambiguously gendered, whose judgment are we using as to what gender we look more like that day? I get asked to my face if I'm a man or a woman. you tell me.
Maybe you should focus on being a stay at home wife. Someone your age with no kids, encouraging women working isn’t good indluencing
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she's actually doing the opposite, by showing what the reality is like
Sorry but you live in a secular country, why should they give you a room to pray during working hours. You can do it at home.. praying is not a basic need, nothing is going to happen to you if you don't do it...