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How do you know when you are "ready" to start dating?
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- Опубликовано: 30 ноя 2014
- Learn more: minglingofsouls.com
Question: How do you know when you are "ready" to start dating?
#MinglingOfSouls
#ChristianDating
#ChristianRelationships
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In the #MinglingOfSouls weekly Q&A videos, Matt and Lauren Chandler respond to tough questions on love, marriage, and sex.
Follow Matt on Twitter: @mattchandler74
Join the conversation: #MinglingOfSouls
Her "good job" and his "thanks babe" was just so sweet and inspiring at the same time regardless of how simple it seems. That is love encapsulated within a moment. Authentic encouragement is not a given in all relationships, it needs to be cultivated, and love is seen in the desire, the process, and results of that work. From that gesture alone I could see they've worked, and the fruits thereof are lovely.
Kelebogile Neo Molope I noticed the same thing 😁
I also noticed that-it's so sweet! Really touched my heart.
So sweet but he talks to single women like we’re not worthy of respect - his wife is clearly very young but he doesn’t have any empathy for women who don’t have the privilege of marrying young, feel sad about that. These women might never have children and he doesn’t think that’s worth being sad over or being empathetic about. Easy for him and his wife, they married young. She’s conventionally attractive - easier to find a spouse. That’s largely why he married her. But the rest of us who are struggling, not our fault we were born with the way we look, he tells us to get over our sorrow.
Well that’s the love he thinks single people aren’t worthy of and ‘don’t need’ but I bet he couldn’t live without it.
It’s alright for other people to just be lonely though right, while married people enjoy life and have sex. Of course they’re in love, it’s cause they have sex
Gives me hope as a 22 year old living in this sad society. Definitely not ready to date, the lord is still shaping and molding me, just gotta be patient.
Awesome attitude 🙌🏼
I too am 22 and that's exactly what I see in my life right now
I think this advice is great because it definitely beats casual dating any day because it doesn't lead to a trail of broken hearts. If you're seeking a person, it shouldn't be on a whim. Why? Because physical affections link people much quicker than words. So, that person's value easily becomes attached in those actions.
If you aren't seeking long-term relations with that person, its just best that you wait until you are. I'm sure that there are women who want someone to emulate God's love for them and will wait for that guy to come to do so. If that person sees her and believes her to be worth it, then that person must be confident and make up his mind to pursue and confide in soon valuing her to marriage and till death. (Of course, death should be the last thing on our minds but yeah, till then)
Because Love is serious and if people screw up another person's view of love, it ruins them as a person and even worse, their image or relationship of God. So, be careful and seek God's wisdom and mature, and Godly people when you find that person who is truly worth it.
@ Theohybrid
Except that marriage has never been about love but about sexual urges !
This distortion of the REAL reason why we all get married according to the Bible is satanic to the core.
The Bible never speaks the way you speak , the way those churchians speak. It speaks the language of truth . The language of sin and sanctification for both spouses. Because both men and women have sexual urges , that is why the Lord , in his wisdom and kindness allows his children to get married and even more , urge them to get married if they burn .
I preach the gospel to myself quite frequently. I didn't even know that was a thing! lol
I think it's the Holy Spirit that preaches to you.
Same here
This series is fantastic so far. So many mistakes I have made before running into this series. Great message!
They're so cute. ☺️
grew up in a religious home and since going back to prayer my intentions are aligned even when I feel very human highs and lows. I asked God to remove people and things out of my life that weren't serving me... that I couldn't recognize and the most high did more than that. .. he showed me that my dark and sad experiences were specifically for learning how to live off of my own love ...and where I'm going there will be alot of fake ass people so my experiences with them in the past was for my future and I already see the rewards. I'm not going to be with my man until I do the necessary inner work. I'm so optimistic about meeting him while I heal or when the healing is done but I really can't wait until he comes into my life. my mind dosent even make an image of him. I say good night to him and ask God to walk and talk with him and bring him to me at the best timing. I beleive in a god force and the right love coming when faith is put into that source. I hope the most high sends me a man that dosent struggle with his moral compass and that I am strong enough not to play with mines in result of. 🖤🖤🖤
This is the best advice to stay single.
i dont think so, but how?
How nice to be married and then look down on single women for wanting marriage
Wait did you just come back to this video 2 months later to comment again..
There’s only one commandment when it comes to relationships: “don’t not be unequally yoked”. Everything else is just extra. If both of you are followers of Christ then go for it. There is nothing sinful on wanting to marry young or old. If you want to date, make wise decisions and pick who you want to be with. This is making dating WAYYYY too complicated.
Great people, great advice.
I will say someone needs to have God so you can date them. Without God, we are nothing, especially if you depend on God’s truth, it is best to date someone who depends on God as well.
Are you talking to me if I am ready to start dating?
And this is why Christians complicate dating. Marriage is on the back of their minds every single moment. Just relax. A cup of coffee is a cup of coffee. That's it. If it evolves, cool. If not, keep it moving.
That's the point of dating. If not then dating is about having fun or sex or some other thing. There's just no point in that. You don't wanna have the problem of being 45 once you're married and then you die at 60. You know what I mean?
what's the purpose of dating if there is no end goal..?
Stella Starry 🔥🔥🔥
ZayingIt To spend time with a romantic partner.
Regardless of my Christian principles, I have a personality that has no interest in dating unless it is for marriage.
AMEN!
In addition to all of that, unless you want a tragic divorce you better (as the man) have it all together. I’m talkin at least 60k salary plus benefits and a retirement plan. I hope to be ready by 35 or 40 at the latest.
No one stops 19 year olds from getting married so why are 35 year olds being delayed like they have all the time in the world. He has children - why do 35 year old women deserve to have children??
Just him and his wife, his daughters?
What is Badofintao Secrets and how does it work? I hear lots of people get laid by hot girl with this popular dating course.
Let's see, when I struggle I run TO the Lord. Okay, that's good. I have a good understanding of the gospel, and I'm in a good community that can shed advise on the relationship. Check. And I know that I want to date with the intention of marriage... WOW! It sounds like I have all the qualities that are necessary for a Godly relationship with the opposite sex!... so how the heck am I still single and have never gone on a single date at 22yo. All those qualities and all the advise and maturity and readiness... it has to be my looks, there's no other explanation. I guess girls just aren't sexually attracted to me? I would say I'm a 7/10 :(
Keep pursuing God. I'm 36, haven't dated in years, and I'm not worried about it. You're ready for that woman to come into your life when you can honestly say that God is first love. If you can't honestly say that, just keep pursuing Him, you'll get there.
You're 22 man, there's no rush, God's timing is the only factor we need to consider.
@@llunde22
"There's no rush"
How do you know that there is "no rush" ? Do you know what the BIBLE say at all ? Get married if you burn .
@@framboise595 Would you marry a man just because he's "burning" with desire? Seek first the kingdom of God, that's what I did, and God gave me the woman of my dreams. If I would have married right away, I would have never found her. That passage was for those that can't control themselves, I've been very close to that at his age, but with God I've made it through.
@@llunde22
That passage is for those who cannot control themselves .. So what ?? Who are we to judge them ? Does God judge them at all? Do we know more than God ? Does God tempt anyone ?
Do they sin if they get married ??
Why is that passage never read today by those so-called preachers ?
There is another passage dealing with widows carried away by voluptuous desires.
What does the Bible say ? I want them to get married.
We get married because of our sexual urges according to the Bible. Nothing more nothing less. Do you realise the BIBLE (not Chandler and co ) say get married to avoid fornication ? In our feminist world , fornication is going full swing but this passage is wilfully hidden .
There is more to marriage than sex only , just like there is more to life than food but the REASON why we get married is sex , and that reason has been put on a back burner by post modern christianity.
God gave us marriage as THE remedy for concupiscence but those so-called preachers have turned marriage into some ludicrous romantic stuff that cannot be a fortress against temptations anymore.
Satan is at work .
What is Badofintao Secrets and how does it work? I hear a lot of people get laid by hot girl with this popular dating course.
This video is lacking something. I can’t quite put my finger on it.
@ Aurora D.
You're absolutely right. It is lacking the ...TRUTH about sexual urges and the need to get married.
SATANIC at best.
It's old order thinking. The world has changed and so has dating, even in Christian circles.
@@bruceklein9917
Can you please elaborate ?
@@framboise595 Marriage today is a shadow of its former self. It's a good thing, just not in the way we do it now. Pre-marital sex and casual hookups take place just as much in church and these messages set mainly men up for failure, being friend zoned and generally not understanding the truth about female nature because men are more idealistic when it comes to romantic love. Hence men especially are learning to change their old way of thinking and approaching dating the way women do in order to be better with women and not pedestalise the romantic ideal. Once I cut my self away from thinking like Matt Chandler and others my dating life and experiences with women improved dramatically.
@@bruceklein9917
But pre-marital sex and one night stands is not God's way. at all.
Please take a look at what the BIBLE -not what Chandler and co says :
"To avoid fornication , let every man have his wife and every woman have her husband" 1 Corinthians 7:4
And right after that statement , the Bible teaches pagans like us about the marital duty , ie sexual obligation in the confines of marriage.
1 Corinthians 7:5
Please , don't make the modern mistake to think that you are free by having casual sex . Men who do that are just followers of loose women .
A man is really free to have sex when he gets married because his wife's body becomes his and he can enjoy it all the time (Proverbs 5:18).
Casual sex is a product of women being set free by the world to do as they please with their bodies and drag men to the chambers of death.
Such things happen in the church today because the church is like an adulterous wife. It has redefined God's will for sex and destroyed marriage.
Please don't do it like women do . Do it God's way.
For the sake of your soul.
Amazing how the sexual issue is totally dodged in this video.. Unbelievable ! The art of circling around over and over without ever getting straight to the point.
The Biblical answer to the question "How do you know when you are ready to date" is when sexual abstinence is too toilsome and you are burning as the BIBLE says.
Not a word about the urge to run away from sexual immorality and so getting married .
So strange that those so-called pastors , when they adress the topic of marriage , never quote 1 Corinthians 7:4 /5 .
"To avoid fornication , let every man have his wife and every woman have her husband "
Not a word about this critical truth .. But then you hear those same "preachers" expose sexual immorality and pointing their ugly fingers at men all the time ..men of course , since women were made asexual by God , we all know. that ...
What a hypocrisy . It is sickening .
Sheesh
Thank you. Also, not everyone has this luxury of being able to find a spouse. I'm really sad bc I have these urges, but I'm afraid that singleness will be my whole life. 😔
@@thegreatestoftheseislove1c379
There are less and less marriages in Western churches and less and less births among Christians . A war against the church so that it does not reproduce anymore.
Getting married should be an easy thing .
There is a WAR against the West and all those so called pastors are complicit of it.
Their awful teachings have screwed marriage , turning it into something romantic with silly red hearts and candle lit dinners or overly spiritualised (almost platonic).
Way to make this more complicated than it needs to be. Make God the centre and do not be unequally yoked. Period.
And make sure to get a woman who gazes incessantly at you whilst you’re talking until you give her permission to speak.
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need to involve everyone not just Christians. im a satanist and i find this very rude and inconsiderate
Wolftrainer609 You realize that this guy is a pastor right?
There is this "exclusivity" word in the dictionary. Not all the time the message of someone is meant for everyone. You've misjudged the pastor already.