Nailed it. 30F and currently living with controlling mother, I've been physically independent but never financially. had self-esteem issues that's always made that a struggle, as well some undiagnosed ADHD (now medicated). Working on freeing myself now
What are the chances that you do a video breaking down defamation, slander, or libel within a family? Maybe you can talk about the psychology behind it, why its done, how to deal with the situation, or the best way to let people know ahead of time that theres a slander campaign that may or may not make its way around to them?
I can incorporate that sometime soon in one of my live chats. I'm getting ready to post the next live chat for this week so I will include some of what you're asking. These videos and chat includes some of this too: 1. ruclips.net/video/0MA5i_YRdcw/видео.html 2.ruclips.net/video/NMypYoEe0Hg/видео.html 3. ruclips.net/video/pb2VjIhPVcY/видео.html
@@TherapistTamaraHill I'll keep an eye out for that. I appreciate it 🙏. Just an FYI, on my YT community wall section, I've already re-posted a few videos you've made that deal with my specific situation along side certain videos from other content creators. Hopefully that's cool.. it's not easy to find a singular channel that details the particular circumstances of each individual experience.
This is a generational trauma which runs in my maternal family and has destroyed so many good positive opportunities for the new generation and will if we (my sibling and I and my cousins) don't heal ourselves. Please keep informing us on this topic and how we can see the areas we lack in and general tips to heal and OMG how should I manage my aging mom she is getting older and I would like to be able to take care of her as she goes into seniority. Keep up the great job. I love your videos 🎉🎉🎉🎉
My Mother liked to do this. She was an intelligent woman, but this behavior is neither ethical or smart. Yeah she used to sparkle and impress people (very bubbly and vivacious), a master of first impressions. But the thing is people aren't stupid! She just couldn't sustain the image in the medium or long term. She ended up broke and alone, which is sad but a warning for us all. There ain't no shortcuts in life. It's better to for both us and others if we lead an ethical and honest life.
This was unbelievably on-point! Wow by the time you got you 4:55 I had to sit down. It led to estrangement I'm in year 3 and it's still a little difficult socially for me. I am in a management role and its Very Hard to act as an authority.
Oh no. I'm sorry that it hit home like that though. But I'm sure this all made sense. It makes you think. I'm sorry you have experienced this. I can imagine how this can interfere with a position of authority.
Unfortunately I have internalized that toxic behavior of controlling, protectiveness, and nervous attachment, and had always felt like a captive or prisoner, my dad used to say that a lot before betraying her and leaving us for a younger woman... I also have kept behaving like my mom and narcissistic dad for years and i have just recently realized i need to heal. Everything you said resonated with me sooo much... ❤❤❤
I'm sorry you have gone through this. Never an easy scenario. 😔 The good part, however, is that you have build personal insight and know where you need to be. That is wonderful knowing you had a father like this. I wish you well on this journey.
Yes the manipulation I experienced. Funny wouldn't let go and then found out he went through same with his mother. Generational. Realized his mother was that way due to losing one child early so had a difficult time when oldest son was getting married. Realized my father lost a sibling very young. Affected my life b/c I had the guilt you mention. How can one feel happy when feeling guilty fir leaving ugh. Thank you, Tamara.
And show them respect as they themselves would want to be treated with. Sometimes care can look like "treating their adult children like kids." But understanding the boundary will mean so much more.
It would certainly depend on the circumstance and why this behavior occurred behind your back. But I will say that this should not happen in most cases unless necessary.
This is it! It was my grandmother. I had no autonomy 😅 Now I guard it with everything that is within me. So glad to know the truth & go on to healing 🙌🏽
Its liberating to finally be free of self doubt about yourself, often delivered by the hands of our maternal « protectors ». I can only imagine what my own mother’s mother may have been like. Of course, my gma was born in 1910.. Alabama so😒
Emotionally immature parents are difficult. Learn more about them here: studio.ruclips.net/user/videoHAuQm3-pfBc/edit
Controlling visible people! People or person that don't want to see you prosper❤.
Nailed it. 30F and currently living with controlling mother, I've been physically independent but never financially. had self-esteem issues that's always made that a struggle, as well some undiagnosed ADHD (now medicated). Working on freeing myself now
What are the chances that you do a video breaking down defamation, slander, or libel within a family? Maybe you can talk about the psychology behind it, why its done, how to deal with the situation, or the best way to let people know ahead of time that theres a slander campaign that may or may not make its way around to them?
Yes, I would like that as well.
@@illuminationgoddess3
Me as well bc that is crippling
I can incorporate that sometime soon in one of my live chats. I'm getting ready to post the next live chat for this week so I will include some of what you're asking.
These videos and chat includes some of this too:
1. ruclips.net/video/0MA5i_YRdcw/видео.html
2.ruclips.net/video/NMypYoEe0Hg/видео.html
3. ruclips.net/video/pb2VjIhPVcY/видео.html
@@TherapistTamaraHill I'll keep an eye out for that. I appreciate it 🙏. Just an FYI, on my YT community wall section, I've already re-posted a few videos you've made that deal with my specific situation along side certain videos from other content creators. Hopefully that's cool.. it's not easy to find a singular channel that details the particular circumstances of each individual experience.
This is a generational trauma which runs in my maternal family and has destroyed so many good positive opportunities for the new generation and will if we (my sibling and I and my cousins) don't heal ourselves. Please keep informing us on this topic and how we can see the areas we lack in and general tips to heal and OMG how should I manage my aging mom she is getting older and I would like to be able to take care of her as she goes into seniority. Keep up the great job. I love your videos 🎉🎉🎉🎉
My Mother liked to do this. She was an intelligent woman, but this behavior is neither ethical or smart. Yeah she used to sparkle and impress people (very bubbly and vivacious), a master of first impressions.
But the thing is people aren't stupid! She just couldn't sustain the image in the medium or long term.
She ended up broke and alone, which is sad but a warning for us all. There ain't no shortcuts in life.
It's better to for both us and others if we lead an ethical and honest life.
Wow, I’m glad I’m found you
Welcome!!
Excellent video Tamra!! Thank you for uploading this tonight.
You are so welcome! And thank you!
This was unbelievably on-point! Wow by the time you got you 4:55 I had to sit down. It led to estrangement I'm in year 3 and it's still a little difficult socially for me. I am in a management role and its Very Hard to act as an authority.
Oh no. I'm sorry that it hit home like that though. But I'm sure this all made sense. It makes you think. I'm sorry you have experienced this. I can imagine how this can interfere with a position of authority.
Unfortunately I have internalized that toxic behavior of controlling, protectiveness, and nervous attachment, and had always felt like a captive or prisoner, my dad used to say that a lot before betraying her and leaving us for a younger woman... I also have kept behaving like my mom and narcissistic dad for years and i have just recently realized i need to heal. Everything you said resonated with me sooo much... ❤❤❤
I'm sorry you have gone through this. Never an easy scenario. 😔 The good part, however, is that you have build personal insight and know where you need to be. That is wonderful knowing you had a father like this. I wish you well on this journey.
Yes the manipulation I experienced. Funny wouldn't let go and then found out he went through same with his mother. Generational. Realized his mother was that way due to losing one child early so had a difficult time when oldest son was getting married. Realized my father lost a sibling very young. Affected my life b/c I had the guilt you mention. How can one feel happy when feeling guilty fir leaving ugh. Thank you, Tamara.
Narcissistic mothers need to stop treating their adult children like kids. These are full, grown adult who can make decisions on their own. Geez!
And show them respect as they themselves would want to be treated with. Sometimes care can look like "treating their adult children like kids." But understanding the boundary will mean so much more.
My mom would talk to my ex bf behind my back. Then the guy don’t even want to talk to me anymore!!!
It would certainly depend on the circumstance and why this behavior occurred behind your back. But I will say that this should not happen in most cases unless necessary.
💯👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾💯 I'm so glad I found this channel. 🫶🏾
Welcome!! Glad to have you! And thank you.
This is it! It was my grandmother. I had no autonomy 😅 Now I guard it with everything that is within me. So glad to know the truth & go on to healing 🙌🏽
Its liberating to finally be free of self doubt about yourself, often delivered by the hands of our maternal « protectors ». I can only imagine what my own mother’s mother may have been like. Of course, my gma was born in 1910.. Alabama so😒
Thanks for talking about this, needed this!!!
You're welcome! That's good to know. And I'm sorry this hit home.
You're the best 👌
🤗You are too! Thank you.
@@TherapistTamaraHill Loves: "You are too"
Thank you 🙌🏾
You bet! You're welcome.
What an amazing video. Great insight and just full information drop 😁😁😁
Thanks so much! Glad this was helpful!!☺
Could not do anything my stepmom thought would be a good choice for me. Jealousy and dad went along with her. Ended up with a true ly crazy person. 🖤
🌷🐞Gracias Chica🤗 💞🌌
De nada, amigo mío😉
My sister is 56yrs old going through this I broke free and she can't help herself to try and make me come back I'm the baby in my 40's