Remember when talked mad ish on her ex “friend” who was fat and “old” at 26 and that friend came on tictok and exposed pearl for being a grifter and showed off her engagement ring lmaooo Pearl is a weirdo
Men seem to have surface level relationships it doesn’t get deeper than their interests. I think women speak on a more personal and emotional level to each other and naturally this can cause emotional issues that look like “drama.” I don’t think that’s always a bad thing it’s normal to not always get along.
@@Iron678Maiden nah I have brothers and many friends who are men, that's simply not the case. id argue that many men struggle to have deeper relationships with women though because there taught femininity is bad.
I accepted a $30 shut up ring when I was 21, less than 5 years later he almost killed me when i was pregnant. By sheer luck and the grace of God I was able to get him off me, and it’s taken me another 5 years to separate myself from him and I am still working on being whole every day. NEVER be the ride or die, when I was young I didn’t know better and now I never wish that on any girl/woman. It is NEVER worth it.
I am so sorry 😔 please don't go hard on yourself though, society does condition women to think it's some kind of success to have male validation. It also tells men that it's a success to have other men's validation (That's why you see very few breaking off from the herd). And it tries to punish women for straying away from the herd of women who have internalized misogyny. The pick mes..
This may not a popular take on it, but I think part of being a pick me girl is thinking one will be adjacent to power, i.e., men. It's not true, but it's seductive in its call. If you've seen 'The Handmaid's Tale' series, you might remember the scene between the commander and his wife where she wants to have input on some political position and reminds him how she built him before the overthrow. And he just laughs at her...
i was pick me in a way that i perceived myself better than other guys. like i wanted to be more masculine than the boys i was around. the pick me to trans masc pipeline is real
I think you hit the nail on the head. I know a woman who is a giant pick me obsessed with male validation, and self-admittedly she's also all about power and control. Those concepts indeed seem to go hand in hand.
I spend many years in the military and I would ask the men I served with that were married how they knew their wives were the one, the answer 80% of the time was "well she really loved me" and 10% was "she put up with so much I figured I owed her" the other 10% I knew the moment I met her, she literally glowed. Pretty much put me off marriage. The ugly truth is pickmes do get picked, more often then other women, they just don't get treated well.
I feel like some pick mes are not getting picked and that’s how they became pick mes in the first place. Problem is the type of men they appeal to are horrible if those men aren’t into you count it as a blessing
And the problem is that these "pick me" will become mothers. Mothers that will tell their daughters "he's just pulling your hair because he likes you", or "are you sure you wanna break up with him over a small slap?".
"will you do my laundry for the rest of our lives?" - he literally suggests she should be his unpaid servant 🤦 Why are we conditioned to think that adult men not being able to do their own laundry is ok and being a servant of some man is a prise???
I saw another video about some men not marrying for love, but marrying for convenience. While I acknowledge some men give “shut up rings” and never intend to marry their fiancée, I can see other men having every intention of marrying their fiancée but for all the wrong reasons. This man comes across as being in the later category. It comes across as a joke but it’s a bad one. If he hadn’t added that awful joke at the end, it would have been a cute proposal. Like all bad jokes, this one comes across with some truth behind it.
There's nothing wrong with wanting love deeply and being frustrated at not being noticed, but putting people down to prop yourself up and accepting a lousy caliber of partner are no ways to proceed.
I know i was a pickme & golden retriever girl in highschool/college and its embarrassing but thankfully i grew out of it. The irony of being “picked” by my husband after no longer being a pickme is so funny 😂 and being black cat energy definitely does help too
So true. Started that phase around middle school, did the mental work to get out of it in my late teens/early 20s. You gotta accept the world doesn’t revolve around you but also _your_ world should. It’s such a weird balance but it’s so helpful
Pick me girls are intolerable at all ages. From 1st to 8th grade, the same pick me girls were mean to and bullied me. It wasn't until I was about 13 when I realized that their sudden, hurtful behavior was always immediately after they saw me talking to any guy. I went from popular to a lone wolf. Those girls had me afraid to have male and female friends and gave me so many issues.
The main thing these pick me girls don’t understand is that men don’t respect people who don’t respect themselves. As soon as they sense you are insecure and self-loathing, they walk all over and use you. Ironically enough, the more you try to be likable, the less they like you. The more you do what you want and not care what others think, the more respect you get.
@@Iron678Maiden Thing is, you shouldn't care about their criticism but you shouldn't actively put up with being with someone who constantly critiques you. Even if the end goal is you receiving respect is it worth all you put yourself through? Never strive to gain respect from someone who didn't respect you from the start.
My aunt who is in a happy marriage told me verbatim: you need a man who loves you more than you love him to have a true partner and she is speaking FACTS
I plan on getting myself a ring when I'm done with grad school and get my first actual career related job. Even if I'll probably be engaged by then (that's very much not a shut up ring lol) I love the idea of a meaningful thing to remind me of how far I've come unrelated to my relationship status
There's a lot wrong with attempting to perpetuate the system that tells you that should be what you aspure to have from the moment you're born, to have you model your relationships after exceptionally toxic ones ... To go after men who are the epitome of your daddy issues instead of ones you can genuinely feel appreciated by. There's plenty wrong with that, and even today it's still romanticized through Tik Tok, Instagram, and other social media platforms. Even though yes, film in particular has chosen to distance itself from that because it's hypocrisy to sell people on something that isn't a guarantee and tell them that's the source for their happiness especially when Hollywood itself has been ridiculously abusive of its workers (With women suffering SA there and coming out about it). You may find someone, you may not, you may find someone and it doesn't work out. Humans are compliavtednbeings and their relationships follow suite.
Black Cats aren’t really the “catches” or the one with more power, just the more introverted, calm, and quiet ones. At least that’s how I’ve always heard it explained. Golden Retrievers are the more energetic and extroverted types.
Yeah, as someone who low key does have that relationship with my partner, my anxiety just makes me quiet and his makes him talkative, it was really weird seeing it presented like that. It’s got nothing to do with chasing imo, it was just personality stuff to me.
You see, I interpreted it as “golden retrievers” being the one who does all the pursuing in a relationship or the one who is more “into” the other. I imagined these rom coms where both people are portrayed as “golden retrievers” and how that is upheld as some standard and to me it seems like an impossible standard. And then I wonder if the so called “black cat” is the one that “settled” and how that’s a loaded concept. It’s no wonder so many women and men are just throwing up their hands and opting out of relationships.
Not with this introverts vs extroverts shit again. Not every extrovert is a golden retriever, not at all. And even if they are, this whole golden retriever analogy is fucking stupid. People are not this simple , black or white. Since being quiet and modest is one of the main characteristics of a "high value women" according to "alpha males" (aka INCELS), I would say bringing that hyper feminine energy is the most pick-me thing you can do.
@@esikazemese I agree with you. I’ve always used it in terms of tv or book relationships. I don’t like using it with real people because real people have much more depth and it’s always gave me the ick when people do use it for real couples. I have no clue where the term originated, but I’ve mainly seen it used in fandoms.
We need to help the younger pick mes they’re in trouble if people don’t tell them about the trad wife to food stamps pipeline that will be thief future.
They know, at this point how could they not, but don't believe. Pick mes will learn the hard way by being the next generation to warn the next generation of pick mes. I doubt the cycle ever truly ends. 😒
9:32 He wouldn’t marry her for 6 or 7 years, but then broke up and married another girl within 7 months. That tells me that other girl was probably already in the picture BEFORE he broke up.
They are not stupid either, they know what they're doing. Men and women KNOW basic anatomy, and they know how much weaker women and children can be. It's disgusting.
I am a bit ashamed to admit it, but I was a pick me girl when I was a teen. And the ironic thing is that I didn't even wanted to be picked, I just thought I was better than the overly feminine girls, simply because I liked video games, sports and rock/metal music. I thought boys would swoon around me (not to have a relationship, but to be admired) so I could be "one of them", but the truth was that only a few liked me, other were like "oh you're a tomboy? Cool". Of course sometimes I was jealous of other girls amd called them "stupid bimbos". I'm glad I grew out of that phase, and even though I'm not overly feminine, I look with admiration towards other women and I do my best to learn from them whenever I can.
Read through the comments here. I’m a father of two fine sons in their 20’s. One is a CPA, the other an electrical engineer. After reading the comments, I have to conclude that they would be out of their minds to get married. Read the comments and ask yourself if that isn’t a rational conclusion.
I would say that there are traces/echoes of misogyny in me similar to how you detested the color pink because you wanted to be take seriously. I've had my own personal journey of undoing that internalized misogyny but it always make me chuckle when i hear some of the defenses. "women are too much drama" like ma'am have you heard men argue? They yell at each other and insult each other, create so much drama if their ego is attacked. I get some tea from my boyfriend. One of the times was when his business partner started yelling at the staff because of one of his daughter's personal items was lost at the event that he (the partner) hosted. This business partner was also at this event but he was so intoxicated he didn't track his personal belongings. And then he got offended when the staff told him that it was given back to him but he probably forgot where he put it because he was so intoxicated. Turns out his daughter's belongings were still at the venue. But this man cursed at everyone down the chain instead of acknowledging his role and/or going to search for it himself.
My classmate wasn’t a pick me, as far as I know, but she did have a house & kid with the dude. She said she wanted to be wed before her baby came & had been bugging him for yrs. Her kid was 3 when I met her. I hope she got her wish, but I’m pretty sure it was a shut up ring.
Pearl is literally a grifter! She knows what content works on lonely men and red pilled men. Pearl is such a pick me who hasn't been picked by any man yet!
I think you hit the nail on the head. Pearl is grifting the lonely men and redpilled men with her stupid comments. It wouldn’t surprise me if it comes out that Pearl is a lesbian who doesn’t believe a word that comes out of her mouth, and she only did this to finesse money off the redpill and incel marks.
I don't think I am "pick me" but I have severe depression and apathetic episodes and sometimes I think no one will ever want me, for friend or partner. It's not that simple for everyone. I don't want just anybody to be my friend or partner but I often feel not worthy of love. So, I chose to be alone forever and love cats. At least, they are simple.
@@karenlumanog1128 Cant tell if this was for me but it popped up in my notifications so I'll reply! Mom was great but she had depression and anxiety due to essentially raising me and my bros alone cause my dad was just too selfish. My dad, although I can tell he cares about me, he shows his care in a very distorted way and is plain narcissistic So his behavior ended in me going no contact
@@karenlumanog1128 I think it was pretty normal, to be honest. I was considered "brilliant child" and a bit pressured to always perform excellent in school and college, but I think we were normal. I was severely bullied in school though, age 12 to 14.
I used to be a pick me girl, not because I wanted male validation but because the other girls used to bully me early on. I wanted nothing to do with the girls that were so mean to me.
You were not a pick me. You just wanted to get away from bullies (whether they were boy or girl) and that is completely fine. I can understand your pain
"I'm a Capricorn with a lot of Scorpio placements" - girl, I knew I liked you (apart from all the awesome videos you've put out). Welcome back, so glad to see another video from you! Signed - A Scorpio sun with capricorn venus
Oh no. Cap and Scorp combos...Met so many of these paranoid, suspicious, fearful souls in my life. I'm an earth sign myself -- sun conjunct to Pluto -- with lots of water signs in other placements, too, but this Scorpio and Capricorn combination is hard work😂
this topic has always weighed on me as kid in an environment that saw femininity as a weakness. i forced myself into masculinity after i started seeing my dad's relationship with me getting 'better' the more i acted like a tomboy. by high school, the freedom i gained from letting that go has been such a blessing. // i'm so glad you took time to take care of yourself my love!! just makes your comeback that much better!! i can't get enough of your breakdowns
i don't hate femininity but sorry being feminine is weakness if not then why men who are feminine get hate and no women like them the thing is femininity and masculinity is just like some job offers, people are given chances to have one of them and be qualified for it you have to have some types put ideas put in u femininity comes from weakness not from power but that doesn't mean we should just throw it away or something i just wanna say why we have to call certain abilities feminine or masculine
@@Irhaablackrose Because we live in a patriarchal (misogynistic) society that demonizes feminine traits. To survive, whether man or woman you have to adopt masculine traits. So, the logical thing becomes shunning feminine traits and embracing masculine traits. I don’t think either is weak. We all have (and need) to some capacity these traits.
Marriage is overrated. In Germany marriage is not as important for women as it is in the USA. I know many people, myself included, who don't value a ring on their finger. You shouldn't judge the value of a relationship based on whether you're married or not. There are quite a few unhappy marriages out there.. Personally, I find it even more honest if you decide every day to share life together, without the predetermined framework or pressure of a formal marriage.
I personally think rpmantic relationships are overrated. That's my 2 pennies but that's my strong opinion I'm not changing or debating. That goes for marriage too. But at least you get benefits with marriage.
Yeah but that's cuz USA is a third world country disguised as a first world one. The only thing it's good at is war really, it's falling behind at a rapid pace in terms of EVERYTHING else. And even the things unique to it like cultural diversity have been implemented even better in other European countries. Germany just got a huge L though because of its position on the genocide happening in Palestine, while USA college students are the only right thing happening in America now.
Pick-me girls usually don’t get picked, but when she does get picked, it’s because she was the consolation prize, not the grand prize. The man couldn’t get his dream girl, so he settled for the pick-me girl because he didn’t want to be alone. In fiction, Carrie Bradshaw is the archetypal “pick me” girl. She was NOT Mr. Big’s dream girl, but she would fall all over herself just to get him to “pick” her as “the one”, including be a mistress to him when he got married to his “dream girl” Natasha. The penny finally dropped for Carrie when Mr. Big died, and she discovered that he left $1M to his real “dream girl” Natasha.
As a reformed Pick Me Girl the men that are attracted to these women are usually extremely abusive so it is not a win for them in the least I'm speaking from experience and I'm just glad that I moved on with my life out of that marriage and have fully accepted that I was brainwashed from a young age desperate to have somebody because I was so afraid of being alone now I am more afraid to open myself up to somebody else now and most comfortable being alone
She’s way off about Ryan Reynolds and Eva Mendes though….ryan has cheated on her multiple times and wouldn’t even marry her for 12 years. Then He presented her with a shut up ring. The shut up ring is also used by men who will marry but only because they know she will leave unless the marriage occurs.
She doesn't care she had the children and is wealthy. So what did she lose out on?? And I don't look to celebrities for the truth. It's a show. They could be living different lives we wouldn't ever know.
All the black cats got cheated on or left tho?? David cheats on Vic, Selena and the weekend no more, brad abused ang and was an acohlic ect. The thing is we just gotta go our own way from men unfortunately the chances of ending up in a lifelong successful relationship with a man is pretty rare once you find out all the details of people who you though had it good only to find out all the cr!p the woman put up with there’s barely any hope. Men are just not worth the risk I’d rather try for the lottery at least it won’t try to kill me
It wasn’t Selena and the weekend. It was Selena and Ben her current boyfriend in the pic. Yeah the Brad and Angie one is questionable and David and Victoria.. well they’re still together and have a beautiful family
How is it I just found your channel! Amazing. Also, the defense attorney part...blood boiling...but the reason is internalized misogyny. Which, still blows my mind. Great video.
I think it’s very weird to arrive at these categories of Golden Retriever and Black Cat by observing celebrity couples. We know about them what they show us, they all have publicists and media training, but this parasocial relationship has us thinking we know everything about them, when we barely do. We don’t know what goes on behind closed doors. Something that is way more useful in understanding relationship dynamics is attachment styles. Which have been studied by actual psychologists, not tiktokers
Why can't we have mutual partnership where we be like Christ like loving servants to one another I'm sick and tired of these gender games and power dynamics its causes most of the problems in the world
Thank you so much 🙏🏽 you always help me expressing how I feel, I mean I used to see videos about “feminine energy” or videos that talked about confidence and money but it was like a path just for men and you always talk about strength and confidence as a woman 🫶🏽 I don’t know if I’m making myself clear 😅 English is not my first language hehe but thank you 🫶🏽 ps. I’m Scorpio with a lot of placements in Scorpio 🤭
No all of my problems came from guys that’s why I’m done with guys I don’t want marriage or kids I like my soft single life a guy would just ruin my life now
I think the men who marry shortly after being with a pickme for years date on the side then once they line someone up, they dump the pickme, wait a few months to make it look "respectable" and wed. Planning even a small wedding takes time, so there was likely stuff going on in the background.
This. If a woman is not a man’s dream girl but she provides benefit to him, he’ll keep her around for the benefits while he continues to look for his “dream girl”. If he finds his “dream girl”, he does EXACTLY what you said - dumps the long time girlfriend, waits a few months, then married the “dream girl”. If he never find his “dream girl”, he settles for the “good enough girl”. That’s exactly what happened to a friend of mine. She was head over heels in love with this guy, but he kept telling her that he didn’t want to get married or have any more kids (he had one child from a previous marriage). When he found his “dream girl”, he dumped her, and within 6 months, he married the “dream girl”, then 2 months later, the “dream girl” was pregnant! It affected my friend a lot.
I love your videos and I always look forward to watching them. I really appreciate your honesty. Nice to see you back and that shirt looks great on you! Congratulations on your one year anniversary!
I had to comment because I appreciate you using the Sex in the City clip of Carrie and Big, this was the very reason I never liked that show there is nothing more depressing than a woman chasing a man that doesn't want her.
Oh how I have missed your videos! Welcome back. I relate to you the most out of all the creators in this genre because I'm from India and seeing a brown girl with same opinions is very comforting. ❤
Amazing content! Thank you for the Netflix recommendation, I’m so happy to find and be educated by a person who looks like me. I’m a new subscriber and looking forward to your other work ☀️
8:03 I really hope that this was just a fake sketch otherwise that man just humiliated his fiancée I don't understand why men love to humiliate their partners first its the cake smashing the the disgusting vows and now this
I got married with my husband because we wanted to be able to sign important documents for each other in case something bad happened. We had a small wedding with the closest friends and family, and that's about it.
I chose not to get married. 14 years now. He would marry me if i wanted, but since we didnt want kids there didnt seem any point getting the state involved in our relationship. We even own separate properties because i already fully owned my property and i said he also needed to invest in a property. We used to fully live together and now we partially live together. We are financially independent and it works. We arent living separate lives and we are very close. We never argue about money.
Omg my husband is also a capricorn with scorpio placements and he also likes things to be set and traditional. We're only 21 this year and he married me this year as well after two years of dating. We're still young so we're not rushing to have kids and start a family. But one thing I hugely appreciate about him is that he is not flimsy or flaky like most guys I hear would be. A month into our engagement (maybe even less) we got us a place to rent and moved in together. We joined our finances and are cruising better than most of our peers. Been living with him for over a year now and married for 6 months and we never fought about money, never fought about who owns who, we had our challenges because we have different likes and personalities but we love and benefit from each other through those differences. When he wanted to get himself something nice, he wanted to also have the money to get me something nice of the same value too. He's not big with surprises but he would give me anything i want and moreover, need ☺️
I was enyojing your video until you said you are Capricorn with Scorpio placements, and then I LOVED IT! Girl same, I am Aries with Scorpio placements and I couldn't agree more
Women - love yourself first. Love yourself most. Because if you dare to love a man more than you love you - he will take advantage of you. He is programmed to. So be selfish, be full of self love and always have a foot out of the door. Never be afraid to leave if he shows any sign of disrespect. You are a goddess, if he doesn't think so.... Oh well. Time to move on to the next. There is a always a line outside the door for women so it is always your choice.
the biggest me are the one who put those girls down who are strictly against the societal norms for example wearing make up and be feminine, i m asexual thank God
11:05 “If she’s not your wife, I wouldn’t expect her to ride it out with you through the hard times.” EXACTLY!🎤 We need to not over-give to men who under-give to us!
I also wanted to add that its a bit easy to confuse adult survivors of childhood abuse with being a pick me girl. Bcuz many women cud be looking for their man's validation bcuz they have unhealed trauma, which everyone heals in their own time. so v also need to not label women as pick me's easily, n just note that they seem to have self respect issues. Bcuz v rarely have d insight into anyone's personal life to label them. Outside of that, as a concept, the pick me girl really makes a lot of sense. It explains so much about d cultural pressure dat us women are subjected to since childhood.
i honestly feel like applying the whole “black cat/golden retriever” rhetoric in real life is complete bs. sure it’s cute in fiction or whatever but you can’t expect real ass people to only have one side to them and only be characterised by one character trait like loud/quiet or introverted/extroverted 💀💀 and also, isn’t any relationship doomed if one partner loves the other way more? like, regardless of their gender???? i know it wasn’t even a big part of the video but kinda felt weird that this wasn’t addressed
I feel like this whole thing has so many definitions but in this specific case it seems to be for the one being pursued (the black cat) and the one pursuing (the golden retriever) instead of extrovert/introvert. But I agree with ya! I wonder how accurate it truly is
Oh no as someone who wants to be a lawyer let me say that lady didn’t have to say that at all. She in no way has to believe they’re innocent. You defend someone who is accused of doing something awful not because u don’t think they did it or it’s not their fault no. You defend someone because you believe in justice and you want everything to be done right. Your job isn’t to let someone get away with murder. Your job is to make sure the defendant’s rights aren’t being violated and that the trial is was conducted properly. The purpose of a trial is to ensure that Justice is survived not to “win”. That being said the system is fucked and I don’t believe in it too much but that’s another story.
After I left my all girls boarding school, I thought I was done with girls 😂😂 but turns out that teenage girls are just part of this harsh world and the male jerks exist. It didn't take 2 months for me to realize that men had their issues too 😂😂. I was 15 and just trying to graduate from university with a first class, yet men (I mean actual adult men) kept bugging me, some actually asked me "are you a baby/child?" "Why are you acting like a child?" 😂😂 Hello, I'm only 15!!! I then went into my "I'm not like other girls" phase, except that I wasn't really checking for the dudes either: I was wearing makeup, I don't care about how I look, career focused etc. Now I'm 23, and I've realized I'm just a different person, like 9 billion other people are different. No more comparing myself to other people: I'm a very hairy person, to the point that men say "give me some" , but I've seen girls that I think look good that are as hairy. People really should focus on finding their purpose in life and loving themselves, disregarding what others are saying or doing. Just enjoy life.
omg i saw to kill a tiger because my mom was watching it on the tv and after seeing a minute of it i just couldn't walk away without seeing it till the end and i remembeR that part i was kinda glad i saw it with someone because so many people from their neighborhood and the DA were such horribly victim shamers and that ive heard that sentiment go around my relative and school too even while living in the more developed cities of india ,that girl and her father were super brave through it all
It’s great that you credit in big letters but it being in such a horrendous cursive font makes it hard to immediately read and most viewers don’t look at that for too long so ideally you want a clear font people would read by accident.
I'm older & I was married for 22 years. Back then and since then, it's been my experience that men know they want to marry a woman pretty quickly. Never beg for a man, it just doesn't work. I have had three proposals since my divorce in 2004, just didn't choose to marry them. But, men know quickly.
It doesn’t help that there are so many articles about “How to make a man fall for you” or whatever. It filled every magazine and now the internet. There are more important things in life than bending over backwards and changing who you are just to “get a man.”
One thing I’ve noticed in desi society is that the pick mes are the ones who get married first, because men and their families know how much labour this woman will provide for them. not pick mes are the ones who don’t find men because people know this woman has standards and won’t break get back to do things for people when they won’t reciprocate the effort. pick mes benefit a lot in the marriage market in the desi society. a woman’s role in the desi community is to serve others so pick mes benefit a lot in getting rishtas. non pick mes are seen as scraps
16:41 😂😂 it's funny how Pink this name and is not the pink wearing plastic or Sharpay Evans type of woman. The color pink is just a color, if you like it cool.
I only have one thing to add to the side convo about marriage... marriage is absolutely a necessity in my opinion. Marriage is more than relational security, it's financial security, property security and so much more. If you are truly happily in a long term relationship with your partner, marriage will not change that dynamic. I say this often but if you are a heteronormative individual look up what queer people have had to endure before gay marriage/ partnerships were legalized and you'll see why marriage is so much more than a piece of paper. I have plenty of relationships in my family (20, 30, even 40+ years) where the surviving partner had to endure so much foolishness because they did not marry their partner (specifically after the death of their partner). This also goes for people that have found new love after a previous relationship and have kids from said previous relationship. If you don't believe in marriage, you need to evaluate why that is. Instead of denormalizing marriage and partnership we need to normalize equal partnerships, respect and commitment. Also -- if you don't believe in marriage at least get legal, notarized documents about assets and other things. Women tend to outlive men and it is us that get left out to dry when bad things happen. Last story (I've been given permission to share this), I have a friend that was with her HS sweetheart and they had 2 kids. He was murdered and because they were not married nor had any legal documentation about what would happen in the event of one of their deaths -- his mom, out of pure spite, went to card to gain access to everything he owned. Even things they had both of their names on -- my friend either had to pay his mom out or sell, split the profit and get something else -- specifically THEIR HOME! That's why I'm so adamant about marriage and making the commitment, especially if you and your partner have a healthy, happy relationship and plan to be together.
When men wrote all that religious dogma sooo many rons ago, im convinced there were women whispering in their ears suggesting that men are oh so special and we simple women could never understand men's geopolitical goals or why no one understands their art and therefore there should be rules that separate the sexes. The men enthusiastically agreed not realizing they had just thown these proverbial female rabbits into the proverbial briar patches. Into the SWOW ( the secret world of women) they escaped free of masculine judgement and out of these covens wonderful gains were made.
Marriage is nothingbbut a legal paper. It doesn't really matter. But if it is so insignificant that it doesn't matter, then why can't you give your partner that. Just my opinion
What are your scorp placements?? I'm a scorp stellium but my sun is Sagittarius! I love Scorpios so just was curious :) they deserve so much more respect!!
Pearl tells other women to get married, have kids, and be virgins yet she's single, childless, and not a virgin, lol.
& I thought she was a decade plus older 😵💫
Virtue signaling for her life! With no prospects.
@@MedusssssaChristo hat€ and bitterness ages a person, there is too much negativity in Pearl's life
And look so old and crusty to be a 20 something year old
Remember when talked mad ish on her ex “friend” who was fat and “old” at 26 and that friend came on tictok and exposed pearl for being a grifter and showed off her engagement ring lmaooo Pearl is a weirdo
as someone who hangs out with men, they are not drama free.
Right? And also my male work colleagues gossip way more than the girls 🥱
@marianesreis lol, boy talk is so silly. We love them even though there flawed. As long as i keep getting invited to game night lmao.
Men seem to have surface level relationships it doesn’t get deeper than their interests. I think women speak on a more personal and emotional level to each other and naturally this can cause emotional issues that look like “drama.” I don’t think that’s always a bad thing it’s normal to not always get along.
@@Iron678Maiden nah I have brothers and many friends who are men, that's simply not the case. id argue that many men struggle to have deeper relationships with women though because there taught femininity is bad.
Fr fr. More than once I had to play "the mom" and end drama in my group of friends back at highschool
Pick mes will become boy moms, then mothers-in-law from hell 😂
So true!!!
The type to whisper in they sons ear ‘I hope she’s treating you right’ meanwhile he’s barely paying the gas bill 😂
😂😂😂 Facts.
Guess what kind of men they're gonna bring into the world 🙄
@@samf.s.7731 king babies lol
I accepted a $30 shut up ring when I was 21, less than 5 years later he almost killed me when i was pregnant. By sheer luck and the grace of God I was able to get him off me, and it’s taken me another 5 years to separate myself from him and I am still working on being whole every day. NEVER be the ride or die, when I was young I didn’t know better and now I never wish that on any girl/woman. It is NEVER worth it.
I’m glad you’re okay and thank you for sharing that ❤
You’re a trooper and superhero. Internet stranger who is very proud and happy for you for getting out🫶
I am so sorry 😔 please don't go hard on yourself though, society does condition women to think it's some kind of success to have male validation. It also tells men that it's a success to have other men's validation (That's why you see very few breaking off from the herd). And it tries to punish women for straying away from the herd of women who have internalized misogyny. The pick mes..
Men who complain about women “whining” about pregnancy cravings, astronomically huge red flag!
There’s NOTHING golden retriever about Brad Pitt. He’s never been able to make a relationship work
This may not a popular take on it, but I think part of being a pick me girl is thinking one will be adjacent to power, i.e., men. It's not true, but it's seductive in its call. If you've seen 'The Handmaid's Tale' series, you might remember the scene between the commander and his wife where she wants to have input on some political position and reminds him how she built him before the overthrow. And he just laughs at her...
This is a fantastic take!
i was pick me in a way that i perceived myself better than other guys. like i wanted to be more masculine than the boys i was around. the pick me to trans masc pipeline is real
That’s honestly a popular take for those who study the phenomenon.
@@indrinita Thnx for letting me know. I don't see it discussed. Obviously, I'm not in the same circles!
I think you hit the nail on the head. I know a woman who is a giant pick me obsessed with male validation, and self-admittedly she's also all about power and control. Those concepts indeed seem to go hand in hand.
I spend many years in the military and I would ask the men I served with that were married how they knew their wives were the one, the answer 80% of the time was "well she really loved me" and 10% was "she put up with so much I figured I owed her" the other 10% I knew the moment I met her, she literally glowed. Pretty much put me off marriage. The ugly truth is pickmes do get picked, more often then other women, they just don't get treated well.
Sometimes getting picked is worst than getting picked.
They don't get treated well 💯
I feel like some pick mes are not getting picked and that’s how they became pick mes in the first place. Problem is the type of men they appeal to are horrible if those men aren’t into you count it as a blessing
@@yveje9720 So true,!
And the problem is that these "pick me" will become mothers. Mothers that will tell their daughters "he's just pulling your hair because he likes you", or "are you sure you wanna break up with him over a small slap?".
"will you do my laundry for the rest of our lives?" - he literally suggests she should be his unpaid servant 🤦
Why are we conditioned to think that adult men not being able to do their own laundry is ok and being a servant of some man is a prise???
Usually the husband works outside the house all day and fully provide for the family
So the wife is a SAHM and can wash his clothes
I saw another video about some men not marrying for love, but marrying for convenience. While I acknowledge some men give “shut up rings” and never intend to marry their fiancée, I can see other men having every intention of marrying their fiancée but for all the wrong reasons. This man comes across as being in the later category. It comes across as a joke but it’s a bad one. If he hadn’t added that awful joke at the end, it would have been a cute proposal. Like all bad jokes, this one comes across with some truth behind it.
You don't take this literally. This is old school romance... watch 1950s romantic movies.
@@FoundSheep-AN Usually where?
@@ViktoriiaAndruska In normal relationships.
There's nothing wrong with wanting love deeply and being frustrated at not being noticed, but putting people down to prop yourself up and accepting a lousy caliber of partner are no ways to proceed.
I know i was a pickme & golden retriever girl in highschool/college and its embarrassing but thankfully i grew out of it. The irony of being “picked” by my husband after no longer being a pickme is so funny 😂 and being black cat energy definitely does help too
There should be an age range of when being a pick me can be tolerable, like being an adolescent. Other than that, you’re being a clown.
You’re so right! I’d even say maybe take a bit of your early 20s to learn and get it out of your system, but beyond that 😬
My sister is her now mid 30’s she never stop being one. Since now she’s engaged I had to remove her from my life. 😊
So true. Started that phase around middle school, did the mental work to get out of it in my late teens/early 20s. You gotta accept the world doesn’t revolve around you but also _your_ world should. It’s such a weird balance but it’s so helpful
Pick me girls are intolerable at all ages. From 1st to 8th grade, the same pick me girls were mean to and bullied me. It wasn't until I was about 13 when I realized that their sudden, hurtful behavior was always immediately after they saw me talking to any guy. I went from popular to a lone wolf. Those girls had me afraid to have male and female friends and gave me so many issues.
Any pick me who is 25 or older, should seek mental health assistance
The main thing these pick me girls don’t understand is that men don’t respect people who don’t respect themselves. As soon as they sense you are insecure and self-loathing, they walk all over and use you. Ironically enough, the more you try to be likable, the less they like you. The more you do what you want and not care what others think, the more respect you get.
It’s true at first they will criticize you though. Later they will give you respect. You can’t let their criticism tear you down.
Most men don't respect women at all, imo
@@Iron678Maiden Thing is, you shouldn't care about their criticism but you shouldn't actively put up with being with someone who constantly critiques you. Even if the end goal is you receiving respect is it worth all you put yourself through? Never strive to gain respect from someone who didn't respect you from the start.
we all need those breaks, glad you're looking out for you. But also, welcome back, you were missed.
Aww I appreciate you so much! 🩷❤️🩷
My aunt who is in a happy marriage told me verbatim: you need a man who loves you more than you love him to have a true partner and she is speaking FACTS
Sounds like a red flag to me
I’m 4b, when the shut up ring topic came up I was like “I should get a ring one day for myself, a “me ring”🌸 married to myself🎉
Got myself a right hand ring, moonstone and I love it!
I did that last year for my milestone birthday! I love my princess-cut sapphire and diamond ring! 💍 Go for it!
Michelle rodriguez did this and I think maya at some point too, yep exactly.
I plan on getting myself a ring when I'm done with grad school and get my first actual career related job. Even if I'll probably be engaged by then (that's very much not a shut up ring lol) I love the idea of a meaningful thing to remind me of how far I've come unrelated to my relationship status
I am aromantic and 4B. I should invest in a ring
There’s nothing wrong with wanting to love and be loved and get married it’s wrong when you put others down to make yourself shine.
Pick mes do it too.
There's a lot wrong with attempting to perpetuate the system that tells you that should be what you aspure to have from the moment you're born, to have you model your relationships after exceptionally toxic ones ...
To go after men who are the epitome of your daddy issues instead of ones you can genuinely feel appreciated by.
There's plenty wrong with that, and even today it's still romanticized through Tik Tok, Instagram, and other social media platforms. Even though yes, film in particular has chosen to distance itself from that because it's hypocrisy to sell people on something that isn't a guarantee and tell them that's the source for their happiness especially when Hollywood itself has been ridiculously abusive of its workers (With women suffering SA there and coming out about it).
You may find someone, you may not, you may find someone and it doesn't work out. Humans are compliavtednbeings and their relationships follow suite.
Black Cats aren’t really the “catches” or the one with more power, just the more introverted, calm, and quiet ones. At least that’s how I’ve always heard it explained. Golden Retrievers are the more energetic and extroverted types.
Yeah, as someone who low key does have that relationship with my partner, my anxiety just makes me quiet and his makes him talkative, it was really weird seeing it presented like that. It’s got nothing to do with chasing imo, it was just personality stuff to me.
You see, I interpreted it as “golden retrievers” being the one who does all the pursuing in a relationship or the one who is more “into” the other. I imagined these rom coms where both people are portrayed as “golden retrievers” and how that is upheld as some standard and to me it seems like an impossible standard. And then I wonder if the so called “black cat” is the one that “settled” and how that’s a loaded concept. It’s no wonder so many women and men are just throwing up their hands and opting out of relationships.
Not with this introverts vs extroverts shit again. Not every extrovert is a golden retriever, not at all. And even if they are, this whole golden retriever analogy is fucking stupid. People are not this simple , black or white.
Since being quiet and modest is one of the main characteristics of a "high value women" according to "alpha males" (aka INCELS), I would say bringing that hyper feminine energy is the most pick-me thing you can do.
@@esikazemese I agree with you. I’ve always used it in terms of tv or book relationships. I don’t like using it with real people because real people have much more depth and it’s always gave me the ick when people do use it for real couples. I have no clue where the term originated, but I’ve mainly seen it used in fandoms.
Ryan Gosling and Eva Mendes is a great example. Ryan could have any girl but he chose a black cat.
We need to help the younger pick mes they’re in trouble if people don’t tell them about the trad wife to food stamps pipeline that will be thief future.
Fr!! It’s very real pipeline unfortunately
They know, at this point how could they not, but don't believe. Pick mes will learn the hard way by being the next generation to warn the next generation of pick mes. I doubt the cycle ever truly ends. 😒
9:32 He wouldn’t marry her for 6 or 7 years, but then broke up and married another girl within 7 months. That tells me that other girl was probably already in the picture BEFORE he broke up.
Will you do my laundry for the rest of our lives 🤦♀️ I would have loved that as a young pick me. I would have thought it was so funny.
Another thing I’ve heard from other cases of SA in South Asia is “you can’t clap with one hand” like what?!
Just horrendous 🤮
They are not stupid either, they know what they're doing. Men and women KNOW basic anatomy, and they know how much weaker women and children can be. It's disgusting.
I saw that vile interview. It’s when Tihar jail r@pist were interviewed if anyone is interested
I saw that after the tourists who are assaulted 😢
I am a bit ashamed to admit it, but I was a pick me girl when I was a teen. And the ironic thing is that I didn't even wanted to be picked, I just thought I was better than the overly feminine girls, simply because I liked video games, sports and rock/metal music. I thought boys would swoon around me (not to have a relationship, but to be admired) so I could be "one of them", but the truth was that only a few liked me, other were like "oh you're a tomboy? Cool". Of course sometimes I was jealous of other girls amd called them "stupid bimbos". I'm glad I grew out of that phase, and even though I'm not overly feminine, I look with admiration towards other women and I do my best to learn from them whenever I can.
That's ok. We all have gone through their cringy "pick me -girl" phase in middle school and high school.
Read through the comments here. I’m a father of two fine sons in their 20’s. One is a CPA, the other an electrical engineer. After reading the comments, I have to conclude that they would be out of their minds to get married. Read the comments and ask yourself if that isn’t a rational conclusion.
I would say that there are traces/echoes of misogyny in me similar to how you detested the color pink because you wanted to be take seriously. I've had my own personal journey of undoing that internalized misogyny but it always make me chuckle when i hear some of the defenses. "women are too much drama" like ma'am have you heard men argue? They yell at each other and insult each other, create so much drama if their ego is attacked.
I get some tea from my boyfriend. One of the times was when his business partner started yelling at the staff because of one of his daughter's personal items was lost at the event that he (the partner) hosted. This business partner was also at this event but he was so intoxicated he didn't track his personal belongings. And then he got offended when the staff told him that it was given back to him but he probably forgot where he put it because he was so intoxicated. Turns out his daughter's belongings were still at the venue. But this man cursed at everyone down the chain instead of acknowledging his role and/or going to search for it himself.
I have co workers who are men and they are really dramatic, they are compiting all the time against each other.
My classmate wasn’t a pick me, as far as I know, but she did have a house & kid with the dude. She said she wanted to be wed before her baby came & had been bugging him for yrs. Her kid was 3 when I met her. I hope she got her wish, but I’m pretty sure it was a shut up ring.
It's absolutely WILD that one of those Tik-Tok infulencers actually believe that Zendaya, of all people is a 'Pick-Me.' Blasphemy!!
Pearl is literally a grifter! She knows what content works on lonely men and red pilled men. Pearl is such a pick me who hasn't been picked by any man yet!
I think you hit the nail on the head. Pearl is grifting the lonely men and redpilled men with her stupid comments. It wouldn’t surprise me if it comes out that Pearl is a lesbian who doesn’t believe a word that comes out of her mouth, and she only did this to finesse money off the redpill and incel marks.
So many grifters out there..
I don't think I am "pick me" but I have severe depression and apathetic episodes and sometimes I think no one will ever want me, for friend or partner. It's not that simple for everyone. I don't want just anybody to be my friend or partner but I often feel not worthy of love. So, I chose to be alone forever and love cats. At least, they are simple.
Ugh I feel this. I feel unworthy so I just avoid everyone rip
Im so sorry if this is too personal to ask. But how was your relationship with your parents growing up?
@@karenlumanog1128 Cant tell if this was for me but it popped up in my notifications so I'll reply!
Mom was great but she had depression and anxiety due to essentially raising me and my bros alone cause my dad was just too selfish. My dad, although I can tell he cares about me, he shows his care in a very distorted way and is plain narcissistic
So his behavior ended in me going no contact
@@karenlumanog1128 I think it was pretty normal, to be honest. I was considered "brilliant child" and a bit pressured to always perform excellent in school and college, but I think we were normal. I was severely bullied in school though, age 12 to 14.
That’s not being a pick me
I love when you said to "de-center men from out lives" (13:24) and start centering ourselves and our own needs. Amen!
I used to be a pick me girl, not because I wanted male validation but because the other girls used to bully me early on. I wanted nothing to do with the girls that were so mean to me.
You were not a pick me. You just wanted to get away from bullies (whether they were boy or girl) and that is completely fine. I can understand your pain
@@lolatiffhur thank you!
I agree with the other commenter. This wasn’t “pick me” behavior. It was survival behavior to try to get the other girls to stop bullying you.
"I'm a Capricorn with a lot of Scorpio placements" - girl, I knew I liked you (apart from all the awesome videos you've put out). Welcome back, so glad to see another video from you! Signed - A Scorpio sun with capricorn venus
Oh no. Cap and Scorp combos...Met so many of these paranoid, suspicious, fearful souls in my life.
I'm an earth sign myself -- sun conjunct to Pluto -- with lots of water signs in other placements, too, but this Scorpio and Capricorn combination is hard work😂
Interviews done by Weinstein’s lawyer, Donna Rotunno, will forever live in my head as well.
this topic has always weighed on me as kid in an environment that saw femininity as a weakness. i forced myself into masculinity after i started seeing my dad's relationship with me getting 'better' the more i acted like a tomboy. by high school, the freedom i gained from letting that go has been such a blessing. // i'm so glad you took time to take care of yourself my love!! just makes your comeback that much better!! i can't get enough of your breakdowns
i don't hate femininity but sorry being feminine is weakness if not then why men who are feminine get hate and no women like them the thing is femininity and masculinity is just like some job offers, people are given chances to have one of them and be qualified for it you have to have some types put ideas put in u femininity comes from weakness not from power but that doesn't mean we should just throw it away or something i just wanna say why we have to call certain abilities feminine or masculine
@@Irhaablackrose
Because we live in a patriarchal (misogynistic) society that demonizes feminine traits.
To survive, whether man or woman you have to adopt masculine traits. So, the logical thing becomes shunning feminine traits and embracing masculine traits.
I don’t think either is weak. We all have (and need) to some capacity these traits.
Nonsense what do u mean by masculine lol controlling emotions nonsense according to me
Marriage is overrated. In Germany marriage is not as important for women as it is in the USA. I know many people, myself included, who don't value a ring on their finger. You shouldn't judge the value of a relationship based on whether you're married or not. There are quite a few unhappy marriages out there..
Personally, I find it even more honest if you decide every day to share life together, without the predetermined framework or pressure of a formal marriage.
I personally think rpmantic relationships are overrated. That's my 2 pennies but that's my strong opinion I'm not changing or debating. That goes for marriage too. But at least you get benefits with marriage.
Yeah but that's cuz USA is a third world country disguised as a first world one.
The only thing it's good at is war really, it's falling behind at a rapid pace in terms of EVERYTHING else. And even the things unique to it like cultural diversity have been implemented even better in other European countries.
Germany just got a huge L though because of its position on the genocide happening in Palestine, while USA college students are the only right thing happening in America now.
Pick-me girls usually don’t get picked, but when she does get picked, it’s because she was the consolation prize, not the grand prize. The man couldn’t get his dream girl, so he settled for the pick-me girl because he didn’t want to be alone.
In fiction, Carrie Bradshaw is the archetypal “pick me” girl. She was NOT Mr. Big’s dream girl, but she would fall all over herself just to get him to “pick” her as “the one”, including be a mistress to him when he got married to his “dream girl” Natasha. The penny finally dropped for Carrie when Mr. Big died, and she discovered that he left $1M to his real “dream girl” Natasha.
Mom and i watched that episode and she said "even in death he is humiliating her" boom. 😅
As a reformed Pick Me Girl the men that are attracted to these women are usually extremely abusive so it is not a win for them in the least I'm speaking from experience and I'm just glad that I moved on with my life out of that marriage and have fully accepted that I was brainwashed from a young age desperate to have somebody because I was so afraid of being alone now I am more afraid to open myself up to somebody else now and most comfortable being alone
She’s way off about Ryan Reynolds and Eva Mendes though….ryan has cheated on her multiple times and wouldn’t even marry her for 12 years. Then He presented her with a shut up ring. The shut up ring is also used by men who will marry but only because they know she will leave unless the marriage occurs.
12 years? Damn does she not know any other men?
Gosling
@@anabltc lolz you’re right but Ryan Reynolds is just as bad lolz. I get the two toxic men mixed up 😂
Ryan Gosling is a cheater ? I didnt know that. How did you know
She doesn't care she had the children and is wealthy. So what did she lose out on?? And I don't look to celebrities for the truth. It's a show. They could be living different lives we wouldn't ever know.
All the black cats got cheated on or left tho?? David cheats on Vic, Selena and the weekend no more, brad abused ang and was an acohlic ect. The thing is we just gotta go our own way from men unfortunately the chances of ending up in a lifelong successful relationship with a man is pretty rare once you find out all the details of people who you though had it good only to find out all the cr!p the woman put up with there’s barely any hope. Men are just not worth the risk I’d rather try for the lottery at least it won’t try to kill me
It wasn’t Selena and the weekend. It was Selena and Ben her current boyfriend in the pic. Yeah the Brad and Angie one is questionable and David and Victoria.. well they’re still together and have a beautiful family
@ufink the weeknd didn't cheat on Selena? Highly, highly unlikely!
How is it I just found your channel! Amazing. Also, the defense attorney part...blood boiling...but the reason is internalized misogyny. Which, still blows my mind. Great video.
I think it’s very weird to arrive at these categories of Golden Retriever and Black Cat by observing celebrity couples. We know about them what they show us, they all have publicists and media training, but this parasocial relationship has us thinking we know everything about them, when we barely do. We don’t know what goes on behind closed doors.
Something that is way more useful in understanding relationship dynamics is attachment styles. Which have been studied by actual psychologists, not tiktokers
Why can't we have mutual partnership where we be like Christ like loving servants to one another I'm sick and tired of these gender games and power dynamics its causes most of the problems in the world
You can. Just with the right man.
Love your channel! ❤ Keep it up 🙌🏿👍🏿 glad you took a mental break, hope you're well rested 😊
Beautiful and thought provoking video. Glad you’re back!
Thank you so much 🙏🏽 you always help me expressing how I feel, I mean I used to see videos about “feminine energy” or videos that talked about confidence and money but it was like a path just for men and you always talk about strength and confidence as a woman 🫶🏽 I don’t know if I’m making myself clear 😅 English is not my first language hehe but thank you 🫶🏽 ps. I’m Scorpio with a lot of placements in Scorpio 🤭
the line i remember most about that documentary from the defense attorney, is she said she wouldn’t trust her son not to SA her like what????
That is so sad, our society tell a woman to go against herself... so terrible.
I thought the black cat golden retriever thing just referred to personality and not the power imbalance? That just makes it weird
No all of my problems came from guys that’s why I’m done with guys I don’t want marriage or kids I like my soft single life a guy would just ruin my life now
Same 😂❤
I think the men who marry shortly after being with a pickme for years date on the side then once they line someone up, they dump the pickme, wait a few months to make it look "respectable" and wed. Planning even a small wedding takes time, so there was likely stuff going on in the background.
This. If a woman is not a man’s dream girl but she provides benefit to him, he’ll keep her around for the benefits while he continues to look for his “dream girl”. If he finds his “dream girl”, he does EXACTLY what you said - dumps the long time girlfriend, waits a few months, then married the “dream girl”. If he never find his “dream girl”, he settles for the “good enough girl”.
That’s exactly what happened to a friend of mine. She was head over heels in love with this guy, but he kept telling her that he didn’t want to get married or have any more kids (he had one child from a previous marriage). When he found his “dream girl”, he dumped her, and within 6 months, he married the “dream girl”, then 2 months later, the “dream girl” was pregnant! It affected my friend a lot.
Also WE ALL live in a patriarchal society, some are just more effed up than others
I love your videos and I always look forward to watching them. I really appreciate your honesty. Nice to see you back and that shirt looks great on you! Congratulations on your one year anniversary!
Thanks so much! 🩷❤️🩷
I had to comment because I appreciate you using the Sex in the City clip of Carrie and Big, this was the very reason I never liked that show there is nothing more depressing than a woman chasing a man that doesn't want her.
Oh how I have missed your videos! Welcome back. I relate to you the most out of all the creators in this genre because I'm from India and seeing a brown girl with same opinions is very comforting. ❤
Amazing content! Thank you for the Netflix recommendation, I’m so happy to find and be educated by a person who looks like me. I’m a new subscriber and looking forward to your other work ☀️
8:12 “Will you do the laundry for the rest of our lives?” Girl, get out of there while you can!!
8:03 I really hope that this was just a fake sketch otherwise that man just humiliated his fiancée I don't understand why men love to humiliate their partners first its the cake smashing the the disgusting vows and now this
As much as a adore cats and doggies, comparing women to them is yuck
Yeah I'd rather be compared with birbies, they are better than mammals IMHO 🦜🦜🦜
I got married with my husband because we wanted to be able to sign important documents for each other in case something bad happened. We had a small wedding with the closest friends and family, and that's about it.
Why did she have a kid with someone who thought that women complain and whine 😭 Iike she knew her neighbor was more reliable than her partner
I chose not to get married. 14 years now. He would marry me if i wanted, but since we didnt want kids there didnt seem any point getting the state involved in our relationship. We even own separate properties because i already fully owned my property and i said he also needed to invest in a property. We used to fully live together and now we partially live together. We are financially independent and it works. We arent living separate lives and we are very close. We never argue about money.
A relationship with a clear power dynamic is a better description than black cat and golden retriever relationship.
Great take! I’m going to watch the documentary!!
Happy 1 year!
Someone once commented that a woman proposing to a man is the ultimate "pick me" move.
It goes against feminity and life!!
I saw a breakdown of the shut up ring showing how they will marry the shut up ring girl and act a plum fool at the wedding 😂
Omg my husband is also a capricorn with scorpio placements and he also likes things to be set and traditional. We're only 21 this year and he married me this year as well after two years of dating. We're still young so we're not rushing to have kids and start a family. But one thing I hugely appreciate about him is that he is not flimsy or flaky like most guys I hear would be. A month into our engagement (maybe even less) we got us a place to rent and moved in together. We joined our finances and are cruising better than most of our peers. Been living with him for over a year now and married for 6 months and we never fought about money, never fought about who owns who, we had our challenges because we have different likes and personalities but we love and benefit from each other through those differences. When he wanted to get himself something nice, he wanted to also have the money to get me something nice of the same value too. He's not big with surprises but he would give me anything i want and moreover, need ☺️
I was enyojing your video until you said you are Capricorn with Scorpio placements, and then I LOVED IT! Girl same, I am Aries with Scorpio placements and I couldn't agree more
You will Virgos like this.
Cancerians like this.
Taureans like this.
Women - love yourself first. Love yourself most. Because if you dare to love a man more than you love you - he will take advantage of you. He is programmed to. So be selfish, be full of self love and always have a foot out of the door. Never be afraid to leave if he shows any sign of disrespect. You are a goddess, if he doesn't think so.... Oh well. Time to move on to the next. There is a always a line outside the door for women so it is always your choice.
the biggest me are the one who put those girls down who are strictly against the societal norms for example wearing make up and be feminine, i m asexual thank God
11:05 “If she’s not your wife, I wouldn’t expect her to ride it out with you through the hard times.” EXACTLY!🎤 We need to not over-give to men who under-give to us!
I also wanted to add that its a bit easy to confuse adult survivors of childhood abuse with being a pick me girl. Bcuz many women cud be looking for their man's validation bcuz they have unhealed trauma, which everyone heals in their own time. so v also need to not label women as pick me's easily, n just note that they seem to have self respect issues. Bcuz v rarely have d insight into anyone's personal life to label them. Outside of that, as a concept, the pick me girl really makes a lot of sense. It explains so much about d cultural pressure dat us women are subjected to since childhood.
i love the truck drawing its so pretty.
11:25 ah, no wonder I love you channel. Scorpio with lots of Capricorn (and more Scorpio lmao) placements
My goodness. All the earth signs and Cancerians are like this too 😂😂😂
I was one of those "girls are too much drama" people as a young woman.
Turns out im a lesbian and talking to girls just made me nervous
If you want a relationship more than you want to be safe, you are in grave danger.
i honestly feel like applying the whole “black cat/golden retriever” rhetoric in real life is complete bs. sure it’s cute in fiction or whatever but you can’t expect real ass people to only have one side to them and only be characterised by one character trait like loud/quiet or introverted/extroverted 💀💀 and also, isn’t any relationship doomed if one partner loves the other way more? like, regardless of their gender???? i know it wasn’t even a big part of the video but kinda felt weird that this wasn’t addressed
I feel like this whole thing has so many definitions but in this specific case it seems to be for the one being pursued (the black cat) and the one pursuing (the golden retriever) instead of extrovert/introvert. But I agree with ya! I wonder how accurate it truly is
Succesful marriages starts when the man is more interested no the other way around
I used to be a pickme. NEVER AGAIN!
Oh no as someone who wants to be a lawyer let me say that lady didn’t have to say that at all. She in no way has to believe they’re innocent. You defend someone who is accused of doing something awful not because u don’t think they did it or it’s not their fault no. You defend someone because you believe in justice and you want everything to be done right. Your job isn’t to let someone get away with murder. Your job is to make sure the defendant’s rights aren’t being violated and that the trial is was conducted properly. The purpose of a trial is to ensure that Justice is survived not to “win”. That being said the system is fucked and I don’t believe in it too much but that’s another story.
After I left my all girls boarding school, I thought I was done with girls 😂😂 but turns out that teenage girls are just part of this harsh world and the male jerks exist. It didn't take 2 months for me to realize that men had their issues too 😂😂. I was 15 and just trying to graduate from university with a first class, yet men (I mean actual adult men) kept bugging me, some actually asked me "are you a baby/child?" "Why are you acting like a child?" 😂😂 Hello, I'm only 15!!! I then went into my "I'm not like other girls" phase, except that I wasn't really checking for the dudes either: I was wearing makeup, I don't care about how I look, career focused etc. Now I'm 23, and I've realized I'm just a different person, like 9 billion other people are different. No more comparing myself to other people: I'm a very hairy person, to the point that men say "give me some" , but I've seen girls that I think look good that are as hairy. People really should focus on finding their purpose in life and loving themselves, disregarding what others are saying or doing. Just enjoy life.
8:47 Exactly! I would never be caught dead entertaining a man like that.
Is this a new background? Like it! Welcome back ❤
omg i saw to kill a tiger because my mom was watching it on the tv and after seeing a minute of it i just couldn't walk away without seeing it till the end and i remembeR that part i was kinda glad i saw it with someone because so many people from their neighborhood and the DA were such horribly victim shamers and that ive heard that sentiment go around my relative and school too even while living in the more developed cities of india ,that girl and her father were super brave through it all
I knew a girl so desperate for marriage she told the guy she wanted to get married after 3 weeks of dating😂
You sounded smart before that horoscope Hokuspokus 😅😂😂
It’s great that you credit in big letters but it being in such a horrendous cursive font makes it hard to immediately read and most viewers don’t look at that for too long so ideally you want a clear font people would read by accident.
David Beckham is not golden retriever 😂😂 he is GOAT 😊
Those two set that whole roses and nonsense for business/views etc. I don't care about strangers lives living on another continent 🤡
Pick-mes are totally toxic because they become Karens.
I'm older & I was married for 22 years. Back then and since then, it's been my experience that men know they want to marry a woman pretty quickly. Never beg for a man, it just doesn't work. I have had three proposals since my divorce in 2004, just didn't choose to marry them. But, men know quickly.
I would be pissed if my man proposed to me like that. I would say no and dump him.
I have been with my husband for 24y and we are not legally married
The idea that men are drama free is insane.
It doesn’t help that there are so many articles about “How to make a man fall for you” or whatever. It filled every magazine and now the internet. There are more important things in life than bending over backwards and changing who you are just to “get a man.”
Pick mes don’t want an equal relationship they want a simp
One thing I’ve noticed in desi society is that the pick mes are the ones who get married first, because men and their families know how much labour this woman will provide for them. not pick mes are the ones who don’t find men because people know this woman has standards and won’t break get back to do things for people when they won’t reciprocate the effort. pick mes benefit a lot in the marriage market in the desi society. a woman’s role in the desi community is to serve others so pick mes benefit a lot in getting rishtas. non pick mes are seen as scraps
16:41 😂😂 it's funny how Pink this name and is not the pink wearing plastic or Sharpay Evans type of woman. The color pink is just a color, if you like it cool.
I only have one thing to add to the side convo about marriage... marriage is absolutely a necessity in my opinion. Marriage is more than relational security, it's financial security, property security and so much more. If you are truly happily in a long term relationship with your partner, marriage will not change that dynamic. I say this often but if you are a heteronormative individual look up what queer people have had to endure before gay marriage/ partnerships were legalized and you'll see why marriage is so much more than a piece of paper. I have plenty of relationships in my family (20, 30, even 40+ years) where the surviving partner had to endure so much foolishness because they did not marry their partner (specifically after the death of their partner). This also goes for people that have found new love after a previous relationship and have kids from said previous relationship. If you don't believe in marriage, you need to evaluate why that is. Instead of denormalizing marriage and partnership we need to normalize equal partnerships, respect and commitment. Also -- if you don't believe in marriage at least get legal, notarized documents about assets and other things. Women tend to outlive men and it is us that get left out to dry when bad things happen. Last story (I've been given permission to share this), I have a friend that was with her HS sweetheart and they had 2 kids. He was murdered and because they were not married nor had any legal documentation about what would happen in the event of one of their deaths -- his mom, out of pure spite, went to card to gain access to everything he owned. Even things they had both of their names on -- my friend either had to pay his mom out or sell, split the profit and get something else -- specifically THEIR HOME! That's why I'm so adamant about marriage and making the commitment, especially if you and your partner have a healthy, happy relationship and plan to be together.
When men wrote all that religious dogma sooo many rons ago, im convinced there were women whispering in their ears suggesting that men are oh so special and we simple women could never understand men's geopolitical goals or why no one understands their art and therefore there should be rules that separate the sexes. The men enthusiastically agreed not realizing they had just thown these proverbial female rabbits into the proverbial briar patches. Into the SWOW ( the secret world of women) they escaped free of masculine judgement and out of these covens wonderful gains were made.
Marriage is nothingbbut a legal paper. It doesn't really matter. But if it is so insignificant that it doesn't matter, then why can't you give your partner that. Just my opinion
What are your scorp placements?? I'm a scorp stellium but my sun is Sagittarius! I love Scorpios so just was curious :) they deserve so much more respect!!