Limerence

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  • Опубликовано: 21 мар 2018
  • What is limerence and how can you get past it in order to save your marriage? According to Dr. Joe Beam, limerence is the feeling of being madly in love. This intense feeling is produced by chemicals in the brain and is a temporary state that can cause the person in limerence to leave a marriage relationship to be with someone else. For help with limerence visit www.marriagehelper.com/limerence

Комментарии • 150

  • @ilililiiillililil9425
    @ilililiiillililil9425 2 года назад +17

    Thank you so much for your video. Everything you explained was very painful and brought me right back to the dark chapter of my life, but this has been hands down the most accurate description of what I endured and why. As the spouse of a limerant, I will probably never recover from this betrayal, but at least I don't have to guess anymore as to why it happened the way it happened.

  • @Ivan-zz9hd
    @Ivan-zz9hd 4 месяца назад +3

    I recently gone through a limerence episode, it literally felt like emotional rollercoaster and tsunami. I am feeling much better now as gone the no contact. I don’t know her well and I just know if it goes down this path, things could go very wrong. I now have the opportunity to understand and learn what I was going through thanks for the videos/chanels like yours. Putting things into perspective helps to manage a lot and avoiding mistakes that we may regret for long time. With that being said, still it was hard to manage, lack of focus, sleep, anxious, intrusive thoughts etc.

  • @bestversion1687
    @bestversion1687 3 года назад +35

    Limerence leaves Marriages,mortgages,children,real life.

  • @Janiacster
    @Janiacster 8 месяцев назад +5

    I have experienced this, and it was bloody painful. I cut it off, and it was the hardest thing I have ever had to do.

  • @romancebuie8390
    @romancebuie8390 4 года назад +9

    Appreciate the addition of your story. Especially the part about the lifestyle you dived into after stage 3. I feel myself headed in the same direction & who knows maybe I’ll learn from your experience

  • @Donjuliooropeza
    @Donjuliooropeza Год назад +7

    EXACTLY TO THE LETTER of what I'm going through at the moment. It's horrible. My whole world got turned upside down. But this makes perfect sense.

  • @beverlypaala-escoton3728
    @beverlypaala-escoton3728 3 года назад +29

    May he be out of limerence before our family fall apart😔

    • @veronicaisles947
      @veronicaisles947 3 года назад +1

      Hi friend, do you really need help to recover your relationship and get your ex back to you??????

    • @veronicaisles947
      @veronicaisles947 3 года назад

      Let me recommend you to someone called baba Eseohe that helped me recover my relationship and get my ex back to me.
      He can definitely help you also ❤️❤️

    • @veronicaisles947
      @veronicaisles947 3 года назад

      Watzap him now for help..........

    • @veronicaisles947
      @veronicaisles947 3 года назад

      +2=3=4=8=0=8=4=0=2=3=9=5=5

    • @tyetr9853
      @tyetr9853 Год назад

      Update us please

  • @impac01
    @impac01 4 года назад +10

    Great video. This is what I needed!

  • @MLBOOG
    @MLBOOG 3 года назад +31

    This is spot on. You should have way more likes. This is so appreciated. I've learned so much from this video 😊👍❤️

    • @marywilliam8481
      @marywilliam8481 3 года назад

      Hi friend, do you really need help to recover your relationship and get your ex back to you??????

    • @marywilliam8481
      @marywilliam8481 3 года назад

      Let me recommend you to someone called baba Eseohe that helped me recover my relationship and get my ex back to me..he can definitely help you also ❤️❤️

    • @marywilliam8481
      @marywilliam8481 3 года назад

      Watzap him now for help............

    • @marywilliam8481
      @marywilliam8481 3 года назад

      +2=3=4=8=0=8=4=0=2=3=9=5=5

    • @marywilliam8481
      @marywilliam8481 3 года назад

      +2:3:4:8:0:8:4:0:2:3:9:5:5

  • @mandyrita778
    @mandyrita778 2 года назад +8

    I know about this subject all to well. I lost my husband/my best friend because of myself being caught in this fairytale.

  • @nim10107
    @nim10107 4 года назад +8

    limerence is like the hands off Time always moves forward the past are memories and the future is unknown

  • @Nasirshakoor
    @Nasirshakoor 3 года назад +10

    wow god bless you. god bless us all for what we experienced. you elegantly and humble explained it so well thanks you

  • @thewrongshoes
    @thewrongshoes 4 года назад +67

    Too bad you can’t stay in limerence during a marriage because that is what everyone really wants 🤷🏾‍♀️

    • @Frank1life2live
      @Frank1life2live 3 года назад +3

      That is so true....

    • @steveburge4321
      @steveburge4321 2 года назад +2

      Yes this would be nice but you must remember a choice has to be made in order to keep yourself sane!

    • @sloeberdoet
      @sloeberdoet 2 года назад +6

      i think it would be somehow exhausting after a while because it is very difficult to concentrate and other things that kind of mess up your life.

    • @thewrongshoes
      @thewrongshoes 2 года назад +1

      @@sloeberdoet Very true . The problem is you still want it - and you can unknowingly get it again for someone new even if you are in a long term (limerence-free) relationship .

    • @sloeberdoet
      @sloeberdoet 2 года назад +2

      @@thewrongshoes I know i'm in this situation at the moment. but i know also you can love two or more people at the same time . The problem is that none polyamoureus people can't understand you can love two or more people at a same level. I'm not talking about open marriages where you can have multiple sex partners. Sex isn't the same as love.

  • @ingridaccount
    @ingridaccount 2 года назад +1

    We loved the video. Brilliant!

  • @TheMichelleRena
    @TheMichelleRena 6 лет назад +19

    This was wonderful I appreciate your transparency it blessed me

  • @vwiggins1847
    @vwiggins1847 4 года назад +9

    This is BRILLIANT

  • @Its-cloud523
    @Its-cloud523 5 лет назад +3

    Wow... great info.. very insightful

  • @littlewoman74rw
    @littlewoman74rw 2 года назад +3

    Thank you for this information. So useful

  • @lua3
    @lua3 4 года назад +2

    amazing video!! so important 🙏🏻

  • @flapjacklouie
    @flapjacklouie 5 месяцев назад +1

    Sounds exactly like my Wife! Lucky to find this channel.

  • @HappyHolyHealthyLife
    @HappyHolyHealthyLife 2 года назад +5

    100% true! You described this perfectly!

  • @THERetiredHomeskoolMomma
    @THERetiredHomeskoolMomma 5 лет назад +10

    Wow! Eye opening info👀

  • @mdmflor4574
    @mdmflor4574 3 года назад +40

    I’ve always called limerence the “honeymoon stage.”

    • @kevinmclemore1476
      @kevinmclemore1476 3 года назад +4

      That's what every therapist did until recently. This is a miss. Every person experiences this in love and in lust. The stress test (again common to all).
      The danger is it's subjectively convenient, allowing legitimacy to messy behavior

    • @goddaygodspower6370
      @goddaygodspower6370 3 года назад

      let me recommend you to someone called baba ugan that helped me recover my relationship my ex back to me he can dafiniy help you also❤❤❤❤❤

    • @kevinmclemore1476
      @kevinmclemore1476 3 года назад +4

      Thats what it is, the honemoon phase. Disagree ith the mimerance designation. not independent of other phases no need to recreate the wheel

    • @mdmflor4574
      @mdmflor4574 3 года назад +2

      @@kevinmclemore1476 oh, keep em coming you have a lot of good information

    • @steveburge4321
      @steveburge4321 2 года назад

      Dangerous honeymoon!

  • @jiu-jitsudude5178
    @jiu-jitsudude5178 4 года назад +2

    This is great information

  • @ovungwokha1028
    @ovungwokha1028 2 года назад +2

    This is an eye opening topic

  • @nellieaguilar9105
    @nellieaguilar9105 3 года назад +12

    Yes, this is on point 100%! My husband 39 years old at the time left our marriage for a 21 yr old girl. He got her pregnant right away and less than two weeks after our divorce was final he married her she moved into my house and they are now living happily ever after.

    • @elikorn7418
      @elikorn7418 3 года назад

      Hello Nellie. How long ago was this? How long have they been together?

    • @tracychromes7155
      @tracychromes7155 2 года назад

      Do you have children with him?

    • @sobiaperez4484
      @sobiaperez4484 Год назад

      So sorry 😞
      🙏🙏

    • @tyetr9853
      @tyetr9853 Год назад +1

      Update us please

    • @tomquesenberry7343
      @tomquesenberry7343 Год назад +2

      Good for him. You had hit the wall 10 years ago and traded you in on something new. Every man should do this.

  • @TW33ZLE
    @TW33ZLE 2 года назад +5

    Very informative!! WE CAN BEAT THIS, PEOPLE. Maximum love!

  • @richardeliasjames5190
    @richardeliasjames5190 5 лет назад +9

    Amen some are people truly blind in the lust and money ...

  • @chadtoscano9168
    @chadtoscano9168 Год назад

    Thank you for telling us the hard truth

  • @Lily-vi5cy
    @Lily-vi5cy 3 года назад +9

    Will limerence end or rekindle if the man is still in contact with the object of his affection?
    Thank you, I've learned so much from this video!

  • @mikeschmautz
    @mikeschmautz Год назад +3

    I'm going through this right now, my LO was also my affair partner, when my wife found out, my LO stopped all contact (we work together) but this limerence is terrible and I need it to stop!
    I have to focus on my marriage, I need to get the LO out of my head, it's killing me!

    • @cpisarek4284
      @cpisarek4284 3 месяца назад

      Were you able to overcome your limerence and get your marriage back on track?

  • @osteopathie-denisehendrick2845
    @osteopathie-denisehendrick2845 11 месяцев назад

    Hi
    Can the LO be an project or an objective instead of a person?
    Thanks for answering🙏

  • @adaytripp
    @adaytripp 4 года назад +6

    The spouse I've been standing for (imperfectly) for 4 yrs and I both divorced one another and both remarried in limerance he fell for his first and they are still together..I left mine
    He is a toxic narcissist because of how he grew up

  • @wrwcf3078
    @wrwcf3078 11 месяцев назад +1

    He just walked out on us in mid-August. Started seeing this person mid-September (or before-who knows) They “broke up,” in February, She is visibly pregnant in July, I caught them on a midnight stroll, he says just as friends. But that was how I want to be with him, how crushing. Too much to handle, but God. I am trying to keep from falling apart. I see why people fall into depression, drown themselves with drugs or alcohol- I feel like quitting my job, running away. I am so confused. What happens when the LO gets pregnant? How do I hang on?

  • @nancyp631
    @nancyp631 2 года назад +1

    So wise!

  • @ST-cy6we
    @ST-cy6we Год назад +1

    My wife moved to Cali from here in the midwest to be with a guy. She grew away from me. I understand that, but she moved away from her whole family: grown daughters, young grandkids, her mom etc. She filed for divorce 90 days after meeting the guy

  • @anniebananny4
    @anniebananny4 Год назад +2

    I wish you would cover the recovery process for someone that never had reciprocation once they go no contact.

    • @MarriageHelper
      @MarriageHelper  Год назад +1

      Hey friend thanks for commenting. We highly advise you immediately stop using NO CONTACT if that's what you're doing! We teach a thing called SMART Contact that is based on research and has worked with the thousands of couples we deal with regularly! Please consider learning more about that here: bit.ly/3BkXVpW
      We truly hope it helps you.

  • @pamelabassmarsh5262
    @pamelabassmarsh5262 3 года назад +3

    Fancy word...just madly in LOVE!!!! 👀

  • @andypriso1412
    @andypriso1412 9 месяцев назад

    Ex going through this now I think, two kids I’m not going to see as often as I used to, she doesn’t realise the same for her yet

  • @gregjoanthies245
    @gregjoanthies245 4 года назад

    How do you know if your wife is over Limerence

  • @cuppycake2911
    @cuppycake2911 4 года назад +1

    What if they both are living with their spouses, hiding everything from them. The limered and LO have a baby together. Will that come to an end...??? Should I keep some hope in this situation that my spouse will come out of this? Because he doesn't want to leave me either.

    • @MarriageHelper
      @MarriageHelper  4 года назад

      Hello! Please call us at 866-903-0990 so we can help.

  • @Tonyperezmusic
    @Tonyperezmusic Год назад

    Gracias.

  • @truthhurts7552
    @truthhurts7552 4 года назад +6

    I want to know if limerence only happens to one of the parties involved or both at the same time.

  • @laughtontendo5625
    @laughtontendo5625 4 года назад +7

    As a spouse what must I do as I waite for stage three to come

  • @user-jn7ri5yl8y
    @user-jn7ri5yl8y 4 месяца назад

    How many times a person can go in limerence?

  • @junimarifam
    @junimarifam 4 года назад +11

    Hi Marriage Helper... great video. Reminds me of my situation. Wife has decided to leave me (wants a divorce) after 16 years and two kids with special needs/autism. She brought it out after I discovered two months ago an emotional affair she was and still is having for a few months as what she told me. Other man does not even live in the state and talk/text only on phone. I mean about 3000-4000 minutes & 10 calls a day and 3000 texts a month. Most are her to him when I am not around. We Just sold our home, she just got her own apartment and we are moving out in a month. I know/understand that I had part of the break up and had to change some stuff. Been working on myself. I also understand the affair was not my fault. Her choice. But she never directly came to me talk about things. Any thoughts or advice? Limerence?

    • @radusoldan1340
      @radusoldan1340 2 года назад +1

      same, what happened after?

    • @junimarifam
      @junimarifam 2 года назад +2

      @@radusoldan1340 we ended up divorced a few months later. It was for the best after realizing that we grew apart. Still to this day she plays the same games like miscommunicating and being the victim.

    • @radusoldan1340
      @radusoldan1340 2 года назад +1

      @@junimarifam yeah, sory to hear that, are you feeling now that, the separation was a great thing for you or not yet? she will play the victim for the rest of her life beacause of the children and because you have to maintain some contact with them ...

    • @tyetr9853
      @tyetr9853 Год назад

      @@junimarifam update me

    • @junimarifam
      @junimarifam Год назад +2

      @@tyetr9853 divorced two years ago. I am now with someone else living a pretty good life one day at a time.

  • @BarryWillBuck
    @BarryWillBuck 4 года назад

    just subscribed

  • @mrjjthor
    @mrjjthor 3 года назад +5

    I know of people who swore they never become a homewrecker. Some of those people fell for limerence and became exactly what they despised or what they claimed they would never be, a wrecker of marriages.

    • @marywilliam8481
      @marywilliam8481 3 года назад

      Hi friend do you really need help to recover your relationship and get your ex back to you??????

    • @marywilliam8481
      @marywilliam8481 3 года назад

      Let me recommend you to someone called baba Eseohe that helped me recover my relationship and get my ex back to me..he can definitely help you also ❤️❤️

    • @marywilliam8481
      @marywilliam8481 3 года назад

      Watzap him now for help............

    • @marywilliam8481
      @marywilliam8481 3 года назад

      +2:3:4:8:0:8:4:0:2:3:9:5:5

    • @marywilliam8481
      @marywilliam8481 3 года назад

      +2=3=4=8=0=8=4=0=2=3=9=5=5

  • @christinaaguirre824
    @christinaaguirre824 5 лет назад +4

    What if my husbands actions and things he has said during his affair and after shows me that he was or is in limerence. But he won’t admit that it is limerence but when I ask him to explain it and even then it sounds like limerence. What does someone do at this point??

    • @trailerfitter2
      @trailerfitter2 4 года назад +7

      It is fairly hard to get out of the state. It takes time and separation from the source of attention. Once in it - even if one is aware of it is hard to stop that crazy train until it runs out of fuel.

    • @henrymason5639
      @henrymason5639 4 года назад +4

      I support your comment and I can validate your theory. The emotional train and the force behind the feelings are centered around a point of attraction or attention so yes vacate yourself from the source which leaves you to confront the emotional strings 1 by 1. These I found out not as easy without help. I found these videos well after it was too late because I search other sources for clarity and help. Useless really. Even now my limerent other comes to mind but without the energy in motion it once did. Am I getting through this in a healthy way? one day at a time, yes. One step one breath one decision at a time. Give yourself a break, be kind to yourself. It's ok. Your ok

  • @katelynnwilliams2771
    @katelynnwilliams2771 14 дней назад

    Can someone go from one limerence relationship to another in a short time?

  • @jamesrounds4225
    @jamesrounds4225 6 лет назад +11

    I believe I am in Limerance with my ex girlfriend. Is this possible? How do I start controlling it so I don't drive myself crazy?

    • @Jennifr1966
      @Jennifr1966 4 года назад +2

      It's been a year, so I'd love to know your status on this!

    • @impac01
      @impac01 4 года назад +2

      Try coach Corey Wayne on yt. This guy is awesome! Helped me a lot!

    • @abigailtotus5061
      @abigailtotus5061 3 года назад

      Two years..

  • @mike1967sam
    @mike1967sam 4 года назад +2

    8:35 - That's very American of you Dr. Joe. Having been in limerence yourself and a bad situation at that as you have stated did it ever cross your mind that being compassionate and understanding with this young girl could have been an option?

  • @crazymorales9170
    @crazymorales9170 2 года назад +1

    I have a question my wife is with another man and we are still married she has moved out I know limerence has a shelf life from 4-48months but what if she's also doing drugs with this guy and doesn't want help is there anything I can do to help her and save my marriage at the same time?

  • @bystandersarah
    @bystandersarah 3 года назад +7

    Are the memories, photos and mementos from the lo still cherished and loved after limerence is over? Or is it possible for them to erase the stain of the lo from their life?

    • @marywilliam8481
      @marywilliam8481 3 года назад

      Hi friend, do you really need help to recover your relationship and get your ex back to you???????

    • @marywilliam8481
      @marywilliam8481 3 года назад

      Let me recommend you to someone called baba Eseohe that helped me recover my relationship and get my ex back to me.
      He can definitely help you also ❤️❤️

    • @marywilliam8481
      @marywilliam8481 3 года назад

      Watzap him now for help.................

    • @marywilliam8481
      @marywilliam8481 3 года назад

      +2:3:4:8:0:8:4:0:2:3:9:5:5

    • @marywilliam8481
      @marywilliam8481 3 года назад

      +2=3=4=8=0=8=4=0=2=3=9=5=5

  • @jaredvaughan1665
    @jaredvaughan1665 4 года назад +5

    Just like Anna karenina

  • @Heymonda8794
    @Heymonda8794 3 года назад +5

    How do you deal with a person that always feel that there's always something missing and chasing after it?

    • @veronicaisles947
      @veronicaisles947 3 года назад +1

      Hi friend, do you really need help to recover your relationship and get your ex back to you?????

    • @veronicaisles947
      @veronicaisles947 3 года назад

      Let me recommend you to someone called baba Eseohe that helped me recover my relationship and get my ex back to me.
      He can definitely help you also ❤️❤️

    • @veronicaisles947
      @veronicaisles947 3 года назад

      Watzap him now for help...........

    • @veronicaisles947
      @veronicaisles947 3 года назад

      +2=3=4=8=0=8=4=0=2=3=9=5=5

    • @waynepolo6193
      @waynepolo6193 2 года назад

      You don’t, if you can help it. Gotta open yourself up to the person you don’t even know you can be yet.

  • @sandymaldonado2192
    @sandymaldonado2192 3 года назад +3

    How would you know who went into limerence fastest? My husband is in a limerent affair. I saw messages btwn them which is how i found out. The LO sought him out but idl who actually went in first.

    • @marywilliam8481
      @marywilliam8481 3 года назад

      Hi friend, do you really need help to recover your relationship and get your ex back to you???????

    • @marywilliam8481
      @marywilliam8481 3 года назад

      Let me recommend you to someone called baba Eseohe that helped me recover my relationship and get my ex back to me..he can definitely help you also ❤️❤️

    • @marywilliam8481
      @marywilliam8481 3 года назад

      Watzap him now for help.................

    • @marywilliam8481
      @marywilliam8481 3 года назад

      +2=3=4=8=0=8=4=0=2=3=9=5=5

    • @marywilliam8481
      @marywilliam8481 3 года назад

      +2:3:4:8:0:8:4:0:2:3:9:5:5

  • @kingsman5708
    @kingsman5708 4 года назад

    Yes I needs to get married I need to talk

  • @traciort233
    @traciort233 5 лет назад +9

    I'd like to speak with Alice!

    • @peggystangroom5682
      @peggystangroom5682 4 года назад

      My husband did this azad after 24 years left and married her I now he doesn't love her

    • @kennyplay5982
      @kennyplay5982 3 года назад

      Go ask Alice

  • @OniiChanPls
    @OniiChanPls Год назад +2

    Man it's like some Romeo and juliet syndrome. And i got it. Yikes.

  • @Brbljiva
    @Brbljiva 3 года назад +3

    Shiterance, its a term a just invaded. Will make a video about it soon.

  • @Random-rt5ec
    @Random-rt5ec 11 месяцев назад

    I only wish my wife left me for her other man limerence partner, unfortunately the other man dumped her when I found out and I would have gladly let him have her & take over the mortgage payments.

  • @FSTNG
    @FSTNG 3 года назад

    Has the book ever been written?

  • @janners7
    @janners7 5 лет назад +3

    Is it abnormal that I have never had a limerent relationship/attachment?

    • @trailerfitter2
      @trailerfitter2 4 года назад +8

      @@EadsB7002 perhaps your marriage is Seritonin based and more stable than a dopamine state?

  • @MS-de7bb
    @MS-de7bb 3 года назад

    The irony of your name..

  • @decostrs
    @decostrs 3 года назад

    How do I get my soon to be ex-wife to watch this.

    • @marywilliam8481
      @marywilliam8481 3 года назад

      Hi friend, do you really need help to recover your relationship and get your ex back to you???????

    • @marywilliam8481
      @marywilliam8481 3 года назад

      Let me recommend you to someone called baba Eseohe that helped me recover my relationship and get my ex back to me.
      He can definitely help you also ❤️❤️

    • @marywilliam8481
      @marywilliam8481 3 года назад

      Watzap him now for help...............

    • @marywilliam8481
      @marywilliam8481 3 года назад

      +2:3:4:8:0:8:4:0:2:3:9:5:5

    • @marywilliam8481
      @marywilliam8481 3 года назад

      +2=3=4=8=0=8=4=0=2=3=9=5=5