I encourage young, aimless men to join the airforce, navy, or coast guard; however, I always warn them to avoid the army and marine corps. And I discourage all women from joining any branch of the armed forces.
@@CliftonHicksbanjo Why not the corps? I turned 18 a few days back and looking to sign the papers. Young, not exactly aimless but am looking for something more out of the life I currently live.
Hey Clifton, I’m a retired British tank soldier (Challenger) and we got real good at taking a dump off the side of the tank. A boys gotta be careful that he doesn’t collect any by accident and return it to the Rotating Restaurant (the turret) as the other crew members wouldn’t be pleased. The British can be quite an aggressive bunch and the squaddies (soldiers) were worse than the average. I also love playing my banjo(s) , mostly Clawhammer so I’m clearly a ‘brother from another AFV’. As you can tell my rhyming is worse than my storytelling. Load APFSDS (Armour Piercing Fin Stabilised Discarding Sabot) - a good answer to most of life’s problems. Love your version of Cotton eyed Joe
Great story! We were buttoned up on an extended mission in Ar Ramadi, 2006; our driver had to take a dump in a garbage bag in the driving position (recumbent, for all non 19K...). That was an interesting day...
Heard some pretty crazy stories about how they used mortar: suspending the shell with ice so that when it melted and the bomb went on its way, they were already halfway to the next county. Got pretty good at timing the ice fuse, could set them up to drop along the roadways of regularly scheduled convoys and hit supply lines without risking immediate retribution.
We had a guy like . We called him the “phantom shitter” though because nobody ever confessed to being the creator of the questionable shit piles that kept turning up in unauthorized places. Who he was remains a mystery to this day.
Guy in my ANG unit was ex Cav Scout and told a similar story about the same time. Said he exited the vehicle and dropped a deuce and later took some IDF so everyone exited and somebody ended up crawling in his shit..lol. Thanks for your service brother. Deployed ANG to Iraq, AFG x2 and Kuwait.
This is some M26 Lemon Grenade style material lol. Love the stories Clifton. I listened to your whole piece on PBS about your time Iraq, and Baghdad. Very glad your still with us and able to share stuff like this and banjo tunes with us. You seem like a great guy. Hats off to you, and thanks for the story!
Well that is a whole lot better then the Mad Crapper that I had to witness while in the Air Force. I was in UAE before the war and I had to do my business. In the Air Force we use bathrooms not tanks however we do, as in every branch, have a few winners. Upon stepping into the bathroom I saw a huge smiley face on one of the stall doors that was drawn with a large brown "Not" Crayon. The base commander was not happy about knowing that one of his airman would do such a thing as he sent a very long wordy e-mail to everyone on the base. I do remember the very last sentence of that lengthy e-mail. "The mad crapper must be stopped at all costs!"
i got mortared in the portajohn on balad one time. dudes were walking mortars right in on me. mustve been watching somehow waiting for someone to plop down for a minute. dirt clods fell on the roof of the porta but i had been downrange so long it didnt even bother me anymore
We had a guy named mad shitter in my high school. Dude pooped on the stage, on the wrestling mats, in the auditorium seats, in a sink, went on for 5 semesters before he got caught.
Reminds me of part of my E4 exam. One of the questions I was asked by my platoon sgt was what the descriptor of the required process for outdoor defecation is. Couldn't recall for nothing at that moment while platoon sgt sat there meowing at me... I thought that was comical and it still skipped my mind until I had to give up on the question. When sgt said the name of it, I was pissed, because my childhood was filled with felines. Seems you missed that question, too!
Funny you were called that, Terrance Popp on several occasions has talked about a guy they called the mad shitter when he was in Iraq because on command the dude could let one loose instantly regardless of how long it'd been since he'd gone before and he would actually drop one at encampments that they knew hadjis would be coming back to all kinds of places
Mr. Hicks, I was in Virginia and took some photos of some banjo appearing instruments in a flea market /antique store. Anyway. I'd like to send them to you if possible. Can't find an email. Thanks for your time. Certainly appreciate the knowledge you share.
lol man you Americans were always about the name calling! I got nicknamed "cowboy" when training with the US in Richmond (I was in the Canadian army) because our blackhawk taxi got lost on exercise, landed in a cattle field, and caused the cows to break free and into the woods. My section ended up an hour and a half late to the show because we were tied up herding cows back to the field, getting cussed out by the farmer and his buddies. Man they didnt like us foreigners showing up in his fields scaring off the cows. Our whole crew from that blackhawk down situation were called "cowboys" after that by the americans. Got me a nice ride in a humvee though to bring us back to camp.
I was in Balad, Iraq back in 09. I don't know how these guys had a never-ending supply of mortars, but thankfully they were crusty and old and didn't detonate half the time. One day someone was actually in the sh!tter (porta-John) when he got a direct hit. He actually survived with just a nicked scroat, but there was quite a mess. Most of the time the C-RAM (Phalanx CIWS) would shoot them down. It always made me wonder if the point was really to drain our pockets rather than take our lives. I'm sure a rusty soviet era mortar costs a lot less than the $10,000 worth of $40 dollar 20mm rounds required to shoot them down. 😅
That was GREATTTT but didn't know youse served would you ever tell someone to join military now
I encourage young, aimless men to join the airforce, navy, or coast guard; however, I always warn them to avoid the army and marine corps. And I discourage all women from joining any branch of the armed forces.
@@CliftonHicksbanjo Why not the corps? I turned 18 a few days back and looking to sign the papers. Young, not exactly aimless but am looking for something more out of the life I currently live.
@@forestwatch5540Army and Marines are more dangerous, pay less, harder work, fewer females, poor living conditions...
Great story. Everybody has had an inconvenient moment of urgency, not many got named for it.
😂 that's a good one brother. Iraq combat veteran myself Clifton. Tikrit and Baqubah Iraq. 2004 - 2005.
Hey Clifton, I’m a retired British tank soldier (Challenger) and we got real good at taking a dump off the side of the tank. A boys gotta be careful that he doesn’t collect any by accident and return it to the Rotating Restaurant (the turret) as the other crew members wouldn’t be pleased. The British can be quite an aggressive bunch and the squaddies (soldiers) were worse than the average.
I also love playing my banjo(s) , mostly Clawhammer so I’m clearly a ‘brother from another AFV’. As you can tell my rhyming is worse than my storytelling.
Load APFSDS (Armour Piercing Fin Stabilised Discarding Sabot) - a good answer to most of life’s problems.
Love your version of Cotton eyed Joe
And if someone sneaked under the other side with a shovel and you looked back and there was nothing there!! ex Gunner . Respect brother
I think you should write a banjo tune called 'The Mad Shitter'. It would spread like... yeah. Maybe not!
War sucks especially for kids, that’s our lack of government. Glad you found the keys to get home, many never do. USMC.
From this day forward I'll refer to taking a dump as "hanging a mortar"
FWUMP
Interestingly, when pinpointing enemy mortar fire, they refer their position as a POO (point of origin)...
@@gcarson19 excuse me y’all I’m goin to find the point of origin and hang a mortar or two
That's great!!!
Great story! We were buttoned up on an extended mission in Ar Ramadi, 2006; our driver had to take a dump in a garbage bag in the driving position (recumbent, for all non 19K...). That was an interesting day...
I know that technique well. Trash bag works much better than MRE bag.
Loved a story
Thanks a lot, Justin.
I had no idea. Thanks for your service, Clifton. (Funny story, too.)
Thank you for service and the hilarious story
Heard some pretty crazy stories about how they used mortar: suspending the shell with ice so that when it melted and the bomb went on its way, they were already halfway to the next county.
Got pretty good at timing the ice fuse, could set them up to drop along the roadways of regularly scheduled convoys and hit supply lines without risking immediate retribution.
Haha, that's awesome. Thank you for sharing.
Thats awesome. Now you gotta tell the other nicks ya got. You are a good storyteller!
Also good on you for not ratting out your squad.
"Doctor Treason" and "Swampfox" were my other nicknames.
Miller Lite in the Koozie? Great choice I have the exact setup going right now while listening to your story. Thank you for your service. 💪🇺🇸👍
Lmfao. The second this video ended, Trouble On My Mind auto played. How fitting!
Love a great story.
We had a guy like . We called him the “phantom shitter” though because nobody ever confessed to being the creator of the questionable shit piles that kept turning up in unauthorized places. Who he was remains a mystery to this day.
I love the story, thanks Clifton.
Miss your live broadcasts. Do you plan to do any more in the future?
Guy in my ANG unit was ex Cav Scout and told a similar story about the same time. Said he exited the vehicle and dropped a deuce and later took some IDF so everyone exited and somebody ended up crawling in his shit..lol. Thanks for your service brother. Deployed ANG to Iraq, AFG x2 and Kuwait.
This is some M26 Lemon Grenade style material lol. Love the stories Clifton. I listened to your whole piece on PBS about your time Iraq, and Baghdad. Very glad your still with us and able to share stuff like this and banjo tunes with us. You seem like a great guy. Hats off to you, and thanks for the story!
Well that is a whole lot better then the Mad Crapper that I had to witness while in the Air Force. I was in UAE before the war and I had to do my business. In the Air Force we use bathrooms not tanks however we do, as in every branch, have a few winners. Upon stepping into the bathroom I saw a huge smiley face on one of the stall doors that was drawn with a large brown "Not" Crayon. The base commander was not happy about knowing that one of his airman would do such a thing as he sent a very long wordy e-mail to everyone on the base. I do remember the very last sentence of that lengthy e-mail. "The mad crapper must be stopped at all costs!"
i got mortared in the portajohn on balad one time. dudes were walking mortars right in on me. mustve been watching somehow waiting for someone to plop down for a minute. dirt clods fell on the roof of the porta but i had been downrange so long it didnt even bother me anymore
I experienced something like that one night when three 60mm shells were zeroed on my humvee's headlights.
Thank you for your service and the funny story😂
Hell of a story!
We had a guy named mad shitter in my high school.
Dude pooped on the stage, on the wrestling mats, in the auditorium seats, in a sink, went on for 5 semesters before he got caught.
Hilarious story. Thanks for sharing! And thanks for your service sir.
Yuengling mortar
"Light" artillery shell......
Reminds me of part of my E4 exam. One of the questions I was asked by my platoon sgt was what the descriptor of the required process for outdoor defecation is. Couldn't recall for nothing at that moment while platoon sgt sat there meowing at me... I thought that was comical and it still skipped my mind until I had to give up on the question. When sgt said the name of it, I was pissed, because my childhood was filled with felines. Seems you missed that question, too!
Funny you were called that, Terrance Popp on several occasions has talked about a guy they called the mad shitter when he was in Iraq because on command the dude could let one loose instantly regardless of how long it'd been since he'd gone before and he would actually drop one at encampments that they knew hadjis would be coming back to all kinds of places
Cliftonville I didn't know you had served. I'm a uk military veteran.
Both intertwined with banjo 😂 respect brother 🤜
Great Story ! On another note, some of the most incredible people are Iraqi and Lebanese.
I'm surprised that you could even do a dump. Most army food just constipated us.
It does up until it doesnt.
Outstanding, sir!!😅
Mr. Hicks, I was in Virginia and took some photos of some banjo appearing instruments in a flea market /antique store. Anyway. I'd like to send them to you if possible.
Can't find an email.
Thanks for your time. Certainly appreciate the knowledge you share.
Please send to clifhicks@gmail.com
lol man you Americans were always about the name calling! I got nicknamed "cowboy" when training with the US in Richmond (I was in the Canadian army) because our blackhawk taxi got lost on exercise, landed in a cattle field, and caused the cows to break free and into the woods. My section ended up an hour and a half late to the show because we were tied up herding cows back to the field, getting cussed out by the farmer and his buddies. Man they didnt like us foreigners showing up in his fields scaring off the cows. Our whole crew from that blackhawk down situation were called "cowboys" after that by the americans. Got me a nice ride in a humvee though to bring us back to camp.
We got a lot of mad sh!tters in the trucking industry. Dodging human landmines while walking to the toilets.
Well if you are seeking a new channel name it’s actually pretty catchy 😝🤘
I love that #Yuengling is a tag
We had a 'Phantom Shitter' on my FOB, he would poop in showers and mop buckets.
Please do more live videos
I was in Balad, Iraq back in 09. I don't know how these guys had a never-ending supply of mortars, but thankfully they were crusty and old and didn't detonate half the time. One day someone was actually in the sh!tter (porta-John) when he got a direct hit. He actually survived with just a nicked scroat, but there was quite a mess. Most of the time the C-RAM (Phalanx CIWS) would shoot them down. It always made me wonder if the point was really to drain our pockets rather than take our lives. I'm sure a rusty soviet era mortar costs a lot less than the $10,000 worth of $40 dollar 20mm rounds required to shoot them down. 😅
Hahahaha! Epic nickname! "Watch out boys or that old Mad SH will get ya!"
theres a song in there somewhere!!
❤
one of the weirdest conflict in us history.
Darn good beer
The new fancy Russian tank has a place to poop inside it. It does drop out on the ground somehow.
That is absolutely fuckin hilarious...
Lol! Great story. Used to do a decent hustle selling govt toilet paper in the bush! Amazing what a man will do to have TP!
Yuengling 😎🤙
against the rules to take a dump..hilarious
Man that's awesome generally saw this thought nah I gotta see what is with the mad shitter lol dude you're awesome
Only a true soldier can shit off an M1A1and not drop his rifle....I know you would do the same if you had a banjer
My nickname when I was in was roach my last name is Cochran so cockroach, Cochran same shit
I would have ratted those people out . . . you don’t sleep on guard duty! Lucky they weren’t in Vietnam! 😬
POGS
We’re you a tanker as well?
Congratulations. 😂
🤣
Ever heard the phrase 'over sharing' ? funny though
play freebird
💩👍🏾
🤣🤭
Saddam Hussein was a lion. 💔