I realized how selfish and manipulative I was being when I was a people pleaser. Always trying to control the narrative by trying to make it seem like I was doing things for others so that they would like me. Wow...
you should make a video about quitting a job that no longer suits you/choosing a new career path… preferably for the women who are trying to live a softer life, I have worked DAILY since my junior year of high school and finally wanting to try and start working for myself!
I expressed that I was unhappy about something to my dad today (I'm in my 30s and married). I was not rude about it but I was very direct. He told me I "could have worded it differently." In the past, I would have worded it differently because I knew how it would make him feel. Ultimately he feels bad because he loves me. And he is telling me not to word things in a way to make him feel bad. He is putting the responsibility of his feelings on me. This was very unsafe when I was a child. But now I will say how I feel if that's how I need to resolve a situation. I am not responsible for the feelings of other adults. I am not responsible for the feelings of other adults.
i’m just getting over a failed situationship and i couldn’t have heard this at a better time. trying to tap into healing my anxious attachment style as well. i can only go up from here 😇
I'm now working through a lot of stuff this past year. As a chronic (hopefully past people pleaser) I realized that I tended to go above and beyond for some people who didn't earn it, and in a way that's a form of manipulation bc they would then feel guilty for not reciprocating and then sabotage the friendship. I'm learning to really temper myself now and match energy and investment
After being in foster care, I struggled a lot with people pleasing. It took me until my 30’s and getting married to really put my foot down and put me first. I also had to move away from my family too lol
Stop. Coming. For. Me. Elicia. 🤣🤣🤣 love you lady! I’ve been doing too much self help lately and took a mini break so I’m excited to binge all your new videos in like 2 weeks ❤
FROM the past 2 weeks or who knows it could be only 5 days. 🤣 anyways if anyone’s reading this have an amazing day, I love you and your butt looks great in those jeans!
i stopped pilates because everyone told me my weight lifting body was more attractive, i stopped dressing girly because everyone told me to dress edgy and dark bc that was cuter even my family and friends say this to me.
omG about staying up late with boyfriend to watch TV even though I have a whole day planned! Then I’m cranky and I lash out and he’s like, “well then why didn’t you just go to bed??”. Uhhhm because my initial reaction is people please then throw a fit and take it out on everyone around me? 😅😆 ahhhhh…. Learning right?! 😂
LOL yes you’re learning😭😭🤍🤍 the craziest part about that is, they literally are not affected if you actually were to just go to sleep and do your own thing 😭 we’re out here doing the most for no reason🤣 remind yourself in the moment that if the roles were reversed, he would go to bed 🫠
Guys i have a genuine question, how does one detach from toxic parents? It would be easy if i didnt have 2 younger brothers (15 and 5)… i moved out, i visit them rarely for my brothers only, but is me trying to protect my brothers even more toxic than just staying away? I have no idea what kind of relationship i am supposed to be building with them… i hope its okay to post this here 🫶🏻
I realized how selfish and manipulative I was being when I was a people pleaser. Always trying to control the narrative by trying to make it seem like I was doing things for others so that they would like me. Wow...
That’s some BIG accountability and self awareness right there babe 🙏🏼
woah this!!!!!!!! the self awareness you just brought into my life
i think it can also be difficult to realize/notice when you’re people pleasing. noticing where you’re not being authentic is a great start!
Yes!!
you should make a video about quitting a job that no longer suits you/choosing a new career path… preferably for the women who are trying to live a softer life, I have worked DAILY since my junior year of high school and finally wanting to try and start working for myself!
I made a video on how to build your dream life while working a 9-5, I think that will help 🥰 also longs of soft life videos on my channel too!
@@eliciagoguen thank you I’ll go watch it again 🥰❤️
I expressed that I was unhappy about something to my dad today (I'm in my 30s and married). I was not rude about it but I was very direct. He told me I "could have worded it differently." In the past, I would have worded it differently because I knew how it would make him feel. Ultimately he feels bad because he loves me. And he is telling me not to word things in a way to make him feel bad. He is putting the responsibility of his feelings on me. This was very unsafe when I was a child. But now I will say how I feel if that's how I need to resolve a situation. I am not responsible for the feelings of other adults. I am not responsible for the feelings of other adults.
You go girl! Speak your truth and allow people, especially adults to process their own feelings. It’s their stuff, not yours ❤
Omg yesss people pleasing is not the vibe anymore. I finally feel free and more energetic being authentically me 🤩
"I came on this earth to have relationships" SOO POWERFUL 🥰 thank you so much for all you do
You’re so welcome 🥹☺️
i’m just getting over a failed situationship and i couldn’t have heard this at a better time. trying to tap into healing my anxious attachment style as well. i can only go up from here 😇
I’m so proud of you!! You’re in the right path 🥰
I'm now working through a lot of stuff this past year. As a chronic (hopefully past people pleaser) I realized that I tended to go above and beyond for some people who didn't earn it, and in a way that's a form of manipulation bc they would then feel guilty for not reciprocating and then sabotage the friendship. I'm learning to really temper myself now and match energy and investment
After being in foster care, I struggled a lot with people pleasing. It took me until my 30’s and getting married to really put my foot down and put me first. I also had to move away from my family too lol
I’m really proud of you! Wow 🥹
@eliciagoguen where are you from
my younger self feels so seen rn.. healing my inner child and your work has been integral! thank u queen
Awww I love you!! You’re so welcome 🥰
I’m excited for this one. I always people please. It’s exhausting.
It really is 😴
Thank you for your words. This is a gift. Thank you so much and have a nice day
This has been the theme I’ve been discussing with loved ones all week. This was very well organized and well said!
Thank you!! 🥰
Your videos always come just when I need them. After a horrible weekend, this is great and inspires me. Thank you.
Aww I’m sorry you didn’t have the best weekend! Sending you lots of love 🫶🏼
Stop. Coming. For. Me. Elicia. 🤣🤣🤣 love you lady! I’ve been doing too much self help lately and took a mini break so I’m excited to binge all your new videos in like 2 weeks ❤
FROM the past 2 weeks or who knows it could be only 5 days. 🤣 anyways if anyone’s reading this have an amazing day, I love you and your butt looks great in those jeans!
Haahah I love you! I hope you’ve been well 🥰 a self-help break is always needed 👏🏼👏🏼
Amen! Gotta stay true to yourself can’t make everyone happy
Yes!!!
This is thing I struggle with from time to time 😩😩 thanks for doing this video for us ❤❤❤❤ 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
Good morning happy Monday morning and I hope you having amazing weekend and I loved your vlogs and you are amazing Supporter
This came at the right time, thank you so much🌟
You’re very welcome ☺️
I LOVE THE NECKLACE, you're so beautiful
Awww omg thank you gorgeous ☺️
Wise beyond your years ❤
Thank you 🥹
i love this💖💖
i stopped pilates because everyone told me my weight lifting body was more attractive, i stopped dressing girly because everyone told me to dress edgy and dark bc that was cuter even my family and friends say this to me.
Please start doing what works for you 🤍
last time i did that all i could think about was how everyone was telling me to do the opposite sadly. @@eliciagoguen
Needed this today, thank you
You’re very welcome 🤍
Lots of love ❤
I needed to hear this!❤
Yaay 🥰
Love u so much ❤😭
Love you more 🥰
@@eliciagoguen mwahh broo❤️💋
omG about staying up late with boyfriend to watch TV even though I have a whole day planned! Then I’m cranky and I lash out and he’s like, “well then why didn’t you just go to bed??”. Uhhhm because my initial reaction is people please then throw a fit and take it out on everyone around me? 😅😆 ahhhhh…. Learning right?! 😂
LOL yes you’re learning😭😭🤍🤍 the craziest part about that is, they literally are not affected if you actually were to just go to sleep and do your own thing 😭 we’re out here doing the most for no reason🤣 remind yourself in the moment that if the roles were reversed, he would go to bed 🫠
❤
Not me seeing this while procrastinating going into the office of my boss to quit😭😭
Miss thanggggg… go do what you need to do 💅🏽
🩵💚🩵💚🩵
This is just what I needed to hear 🤎
Perfect 🥰
Guys i have a genuine question, how does one detach from toxic parents? It would be easy if i didnt have 2 younger brothers (15 and 5)… i moved out, i visit them rarely for my brothers only, but is me trying to protect my brothers even more toxic than just staying away? I have no idea what kind of relationship i am supposed to be building with them… i hope its okay to post this here 🫶🏻