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What Nobody Tells You About Divorce | Kingsley Okonkwo
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- Опубликовано: 11 июн 2022
- Over time there has been a lot of uproar and questions about divorce, everyone offers it at the slightest appearance of misunderstanding in marriages and this is a sign that many people go into marriage without understanding what 'Marriage' is...
Join Kingsley Okonkwo as he breaks down "What Nobody Tells You About Divorce".
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Thank you so much sir for this clarification, there are lots of confusing and misleading messages on Divorce which has led to people suffering / dieing in silence.
So much shame is also associated with Divorce especially amongst Christians, nobody wants to be tagged as ungodly. I am glad you talked about this, God bless you sir.
God has called us to peace... so whether in or out of marriage find peace with urself God and humanity as much as is sanely possible
I admire the wisdom you and your wife have. You don't just say things out of emotions. One can always sence the wisdom and discernment in your teachings. More grace sir🙏 🙌
Thank you Pastor Kingsley for clarifying this topic. The people who are quoting God hates divorce are not also quoting God hates fornication, adultery and abortion. Let's emphasis everything God hates and not focus on one so that our eyes will open to how reconciliations of these acts after they happen. At least we can stop demonising divorced people instead of ourselves.
Great one PK. always learning from you. Please can you do a video on how to live and move on after a divorce/separation/heartbreak. God bless you sir.
Renew your mind not remove your mind.I love that.🙂
God bless you pastor. Here I am, almost 5 years later, 30 years old thinking I am going to be alone forever because I was told I can never remarry.
Read Matt 5, 31-32 for clarity
@@brianokorie6005 I did and I have known that a long time. Matter of fact, what caused the divorce was that and it involved rape. I wasn't raped. Someone very close to me.
@@rosalyn4646 infidelity is a good reason to divorce, but the best recourse after divorce is to remain as you are, apostle Paul’s teachings in 1cor 7 reinforce this… I would agree that it is not easy to do, so pray for the grace to do what is right ….
Pls remarry but pray for the spirit of discernment so that you can know the right person to marry
You can remarry. God’s will for us is to be happy not miserable.
Wow!!. So much wisdom. Thanks so much for breaking this subject down to my understanding. I have been struggling with this for the past 15yrs since I was separated from my husband. I was just stuck with the words "God hates divorce", so I felt guilty about getting a divorce. But now that's its broken down, I know what to do. God bless you richly sir.
Same with me here.
Two things stand out for me in Malachi 2:16. God says "I hate divorce" and "Don't cheat". This means that God knows that cheating leads to divorce. This is corroborated by Jesus Christ in the New Testament. So, please people should stop quoting Almighty God out of context just to keep partners in unhappy marriages or justify themselves. Thank you.
Thank you sis….
Thank you so much pastor K. I have been worried about this all these years but now I will change my prayer points. My marriage will be the best and it will last for a lifetime in Jesus name 🙏.
Points to consider:
1. Marriage is untill death (Roman's 7:2-3). Therefore, remarriage while your "first" spouse is still alive, constitutes adultery. The "exception clause" in Matthew 19:9 seems to more support the Bridal View when a careful look at the original Greek words for "fornication" and "adultery" are taken into consideration. In a previous passage, Joseph was going to "divorce" Mary, even though they were not married - they were engaged and Joseph assumed she had been unfaithful (committed fornication NOT adultery - since they were at that stage not yet married). Thoughts to the contrary may (and perhaps more likely) constitute assumptions. I hope it is okay to share my understanding on this topic from what I think is a truer convergence to biblical guidance on this topic, especially in light of Jesus' statement in Luke 16:18.
2. On the grounds of Abuse based on Exodus 21:9-11... are we under the Mosaic Law? Galatians makes it clear that we are not.
3. On the grounds of Abandonment based on 1 Corinthians 7:15... the Greek word for "bound" or "enslaved" is not the same as the Greek word for the "marriage bond" (see Romans 7:2-3). It seems that only death dissolves the marriage bond.
I will continue to eat your messages daily to guard me regarding marriage life I’m so glad i found you on RUclips God bless you Sir 🙌🙌🙌🙌.
Thank you so much Pastor for that eye opener showing why God Hates Divorce which is primarily because of the impact. it has. Thanks again
You are correct in all the interpretations. These are my own take on the verses in the Bible on divorce. I studied divorce in the Bible thoroughly years back.
Hey Kingsley , God send you to me with this teaching ❗️I have been wrestling in prayer about what the Lord said about divorce but you really educated me sir. May the Lord increase you more and more ❗️ I was very torn about what Pastor Paul Enenche said about divorce and surprised that other general's are not bringing him to order .
Pastor Kingsley thank God for you. You're just the best. And I'll always always not overlook Pastor Mildred when I thank God for you, cos if she was anyhow, your clarity in these teachings wouldn't be soooooo crystal, and your method of passing the knowledge to us would be so simplified. Pastor Mildred...you're a "good thing" indeed. God bless you both some more, keep you and keep replenishing you. Amen.
God bless you Sir
Was actually expecting this message for long....
You just cleared my doubts
Thank you Sir once more
Pastor Kingsley, it is God that will continue to bless you.
My soul is so relieved with this message God bless you Sir for being truthful with the word of God 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
Thank you very much for your councelling
All I can say is... may God continue to bless you Sir. I've never heard it more detailed, elaborate and it's so clear. Thank you so much.
Please Sir what are the useless reasons for divorce?
Amazing much enlightened u either be happily in marriage or stay single and be happy don't die in marriage be free in both cases
Good day Pastor Kingsley.
I enjoy your Teachings. they have blessed me.
I also enjoy the fact that your research goes beyond the English Bible.
I was listening and when you Quoted "thou shall not kill" and you explained the context for that command,
In the NKJV it says "thou shall not Murder" - Murder is premeditated (out of cruelty or some mischievous reason)
Killing can be an act of self-defense. My point, Does it say Murder or kill in the Greek?
Thank you.
Very clear Biblical principles on Separation and Divorce. Thank you and God bless u Ps Kingley
Thank you so very much, God bless you God bless you, we have been separated for over 15years and he refused to give divorce I got stuck, and he is with another woman yet he refuses to sign my divorce paper. May God come
Through for me oo. God bless you ooo
Thanks for the clarification. God bless all you do to save families.
Pastor K thank you so much for adding more meaning to this very important institution in the body of Christ. May God truly bless you even more and give you even more Wisdom and insight to teach his children. I have this one question Is traditional marriage considered as a full marriage or the
Bible is talking just only of the legal and church wedding ? In that note what about separation at the level of traditional marriage? Does that reflect all what the Lord mentioned in the Bible concerning separation and divorce or where Can this actually be placed I mean under the prospective of marriage?
Wow what a Wisdom, I always knew God will not put His ppl in boundage the way ppl explained remarried thing
I feel much more enlightened in my views on divorce and remarrying. PK God bless you for sharing.
We really need to understand contexts before accepting certain conclusions and resolutions
I like that you said, God says renew your mind not remove your mind
I just listened to this talk and I was so enlightened.Am going through some issues and will need guidance.How can one reach you
Thank you much Sir for this explanation. May God bless you and continue to give you more to make greater impact.
Thank you Pastor K for this video! Truly a blessing.
I pray this bless someone out there
What if your husband doesn't want to get marriage counseling & you wait for over 2 yrs???
Bless you Prophet. My conscience is clear
I was really blessed listening to this.God bless you sir.
Powerful and well explained teaching. God bless you Sir
Thank you sir for this eye 👁 opening God bless you more
So much wisdom Pastor Kingsley! God bless you sir.
Sir you have shattered table for me ohhhhhh
THANKS PASTORS K💃💃GAIN KNOWLEDGE ABT DIVORCE BY SCRIPTURES AND to UNDERSTAND The CONTENT 🙌🙌🇹🇿🇹🇿🇹🇿
Thank you Pastor K for this confirmatory message.
Thank you Sir for this explanation. Please Sir, could you kindly do a teaching on rapture and second coming of Jesus. Thank you Sir.
Such a BLESSING, thank you.
God bless you sir. This is indeed a word in season!!!
Very powerful . I learnt a lot .God bless your ministry
Chai
Thank you for this superior knowledge
Thank you this has made things so clear for me when I was so concerned about the meaning of God's word concerning Divorce.
Thank you very much for this teaching sir, God bless you
The Lord bless and honour you sir
So much wisdom in this video. I'm happy watching it. God bless you 🙏
God bless you for this clarification.
I learnt a lot.... More wisdom sir
Thanks #dralieaotor for everything, my partner is back and we are
living happily like never before❤️💯
This will be my portion soon in Jesus’ name
Thanks so much sir for this teaching
Nice teaching
This so powerful…thank you sir
Very enlightening. Thank you Pastor Kingsley
This is so profound.Thank you Pastor K
Thanks Pastor k for this eye opener,God bless you
Hope this goes too for men if they commit adultery
Unfortunately we will be surprised on the day of judgement for setting our own starndard.
we live in an a time where people now use head knowledge to interpret the scripture
@@kay6257 true scriptures don't need much interpretation ,today someone who know very well divorce isn't right will re-marry them interprete the scripture to fit their new marriage day of judgement people will cry.
@@PPOJ 🤣🤣 Don't be here counting laws for people 🙄, you are crazy, you will still be part of the women in church who will degrade a woman who is divorced even if her husband was beating her. Divorcees (whether they remarry or not)will still make heaven whether you like it or not, so rest.
@@sadraolaedo4733 The word of God will stand you do what pleases you but the day of reckoning you will remember this comment.
@@PPOJ 😂😂😂😂😂 I will enter heaven whether you like it or not
God bless you sir
That makes a lot of sense! But fear will not allow me tell my mum because she attends a church that twists the words in the Bible in order to control the members and I'm not ready for any argument 😩
Tell her, but pray first
Sir please stay in your lane of building marriages, you a really good at that and you are saving many marriages. according to different translation putting away is translated as divorce but not separation as you put it. 1Cor 7 clarify this as well. From the beginning God created them as one, and what the Lord has joined together let no man put asunder, that is why 1 Cor 7 say if you divorce you are not allowed to to marry until you reconcile with your spouse only when your spouse dies you can marry. The only people who are not bound by this covenant are unbelievers.
Thanks for sharing pastor K
I have been enlightened. God bless you sir
Thank you Pastor for this video, very insightful.
My understanding of the word Fornication in this text ,The Jews only used to marry virgins, so on the wedding day if the man finds out the woman has committed fornication he has the right to divorce. Because married people can't fall into fornication but they can fall into adultery. Please help Pastor ?
who defined fornication as sex before marriage tho? i believe fornication simply means sexual immorality
Thank you sir
Thank you very much Pastor K for the clarification, God bless you
What about when the other refused tor accept divorce or sign the divorce papers
Thanks
Good experience
Heyyy!!!!!! Hmmmm!!! Pastor! You just brought me clarity. But please There's this thing I don't understand about marriage, divorce and re-marrying.
Especially going to the "altar of God" to remarry. Pls school me. Is it normal?
Good morning sir,thank you for this message sir, I have a question for you sir, What do you as a wife If your husband is not talking to you,
No communication what so ever
Never Admire you
Never praise you
,, take use out
,,support you in every areas of your life
Maltreated your child from another Man, your first love who is late now
Never take you on holiday
Makes you feel so lonely
You supported him in the house financially
But never say thank you nor any sign of appreciation,
Never celebrate you, on Mother’s Day
Birthday
Christmas
Valentine’s Day, no gift for me on all of this celebration period,
I do got him an expensive gift but never say thank you or appreciate it
Never spent time with me
Even having sex, he doesn’t appreciate still
etc
Am interested in this counsel. Please pastor can you answer this question.
this describes some of what I experienced. I left two months ago... I await his counsel too
My dear divorce?
Wow! Quite enlightening
Thank you so much for this powerful teaching... God bless you, pastor K...
This is balanced view of the subject. When you talk of abuse it seems you assumed that only the woman is the victim. What happens when the man is the victim of the abuse? In Africa where spiritism is rampart, what happens when one of them is into witchcraft and there is evidence of use of witchcraft to manipulate the other. Witchcraft manipulation can be fatal. What do you advice where witchcraft is evidently involved?
Enlightening ❤️❤️❤️
Just read my Bible again. Matthew 19:9 it clearly said divorce not separation.
As much as a lot of issues have come up in the Body of Christ today, some things have not changed.
God hates divorce, yes. I agree with you. As rightly said Jesus Christ answered correctly when he referenced Moses in Deuteronomy.
However, you didn't mention what Apostle Paul said in 1 Cor 7:10-11. He said "yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband, but even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not yo divorce his wife".
Are you going to say that Apst Paul was speaking for himself? Or here divorce was a synonym for putting away? As believers, we are not to divorce. And if we do, we should remain unmarried or reconcile.
We have been adulterous in our marriage to God Almighty yet He has not divorced us or put us away. Rather he has given us redemption through the Blood of the Lamb.
We need to be careful. Let us not, in our quest to satisfy itching ears, go against the Word of God or mix truth with lies.
It is better to teach the church how to forgive one another as God forgives us.
Thanks Pastor K. Really learned a lot. Pastor K this your hair di sweet me ooo. hahahaha
Sir, the Greek word used for the “putting away” and “divorcement” are one and the same. Doesn’t that mean there’s no difference between putting away and divorce? Pls explain. Thank you Sir
Please note that in this verse, "put away" and "divorce" are the same Greek word, apoluo. It is wrong to translate apoluo as "put away" the first time that it appears in the verse and then as "divorce" the second time. That hides the true meaning of this verse.)
They actually mean the same thing… the first text he read (Matt 5:31-32)clearly said whoever marries a divorced woman, is committing adultery, I believe it’s an honest mistake… but following with his logic, if divorce is in two stages, the first being putting away, then divorce is only lawful if there is fornication involved…
So logically you should not marry anyone who was divorced if not on the grounds of adultery, and why would you marry someone who was divorced on the grounds of adultery…..😂😂😂.. confusing yeah?
The good thing is paul clearly restated what Jesus was saying in 1 Corinthians 7… my summary, Single people should avoid marrying divorced people, cause the matter is risky, Divorced people should stay single as stated by Jesus and the apostle Paul, but if they must, they may marry other divorced people as a matter of person judgement…
My Revised standard version uses the word divorce all through. So separation is in two ways, first staying aparting and if problems are irreconcilable like issues of adultery and domestic violence,then a certificate of divorce should be granted for freedom
@@brianokorie6005 pls there is no honest "mistake" in the word of God. The word of God is YES and Amen. No mistakes please oo
See the Greek word for the four English words or phrases
Put away - apotamiévo
Putting away - vázontas makriá
Divorce - diazýgio
Divorcement - diázefxi
So they are different
Putting away was part of the divorce process. The letter of divorce was just a formal statement of the putting away which was the act of divorce. So that the divorce is not just implicit, but explicit.
That's why the letter of divorce was absolutely given after putting away a wife. If putting away wasn't part of divorce, then the letter of divorce wouldn't absolutely follow it.
Matthew 5:31-32 KJV
It hath been said, Whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing of divorcement
In other words, a man had no right to put away a wife without letter of divorce.
Men can do what they want and put away their wives anyhow for any reason. But the put away that's discussed in the bible in the context of marriage is the one that is part of the divorce process and is associated with a writing of divorce.
To understand it, we first have to realize that old testament commands (apart from the ten commandments) were illustrative of realities about God's plan of redemption.
For instance, the sacrifice of lamb was illustrative of Christ sacrifice at the cross for the redemption of humanity.
The law on dowry was illustrative of redemption.
The law of Moses of eye for an eye and tooth for a tooth was illustrative of God's wrath that was reserved for humanity. How each one was going to face God's wrath in function of his/her transgressions.
And this law about divorce, was illustrative of the fact that humanity was displeasing to God and God was about to divorce humanity to find a new "bride". Because God is perfect, but humanity is not perfect. And God would divorce humanity for any defect in humanity. Just as men would divorce their wives for any slight defect in them.
Even in their wickedness, men were illustrating realities about God's plan of redemption.
But Christ came to fulfil the law. Not just the law of the perfect standard of God for humanity, the ten commandments, Christ fulfilled that in us for our sanctification. The law of the perfect standard of God for humanity is written in our hearts and minds. Is fulfilled in us for our sanctification.
Hebrews 10:16
“This is the covenant that I will make with them after those days, saith the Lord, I will put my laws into their hearts, and in their minds will I write them;”
But before that, Christ went on the cross to fulfill the other ceremonial and illustrative laws, which include the law of Moses. For our redemption.
Christ took God's wrath on the cross. That's how he fulfilled the law of Moses of eye for an eye and tooth for a tooth. And since Christ took God's wrath completely on the cross, those who believe in his sacrifice of redemption don't need to practice the illustrative law of Moses of eye for an eye and tooth for a tooth.
Particularly, the law of Moses about divorce, which illustrated how God was about to divorce humanity, Christ also took the divorce on the cross when he shouted, "Father, father, why have you forsaken me". That was the divorce that was reserved for humanity, but Christ took it on the cross. So that those who believe in Christ's redemptive work don't give the illustrative divorce of Moses's law to anyone.
So those laws of Moses, particularly the one on divorce were not model for new covenant believers, but were illustrative of realities about God's plan of redemption.
Exactly my thought sir.
Please don't believe this teaching read 1 Corinthians 7. And Romans 7 verses 2&3
Romans 7:2-3
[2]For the woman who has a husband is bound by the law to her husband as long as he lives. But if the husband dies, she is released from the law of her husband.
[3]So then if, while her husband lives, she marries another man, she will be called an adulteress; but if her husband dies, she is free from that law, so that she is no adulteress, though she has married another man.
Yes
Its says death. Meaning the person that you are married to has to be dead. Before you can get married again and only in the lord. 1 Corinthians 7:39. If you go back and read the stories of david and he wife's two had husband before him. But the HUSBANDs died. So he could marry them. Death had to happen because the women is bond to her husband. And Mark 10:12 and luke 16:18
Yes 🙌🏽
Hello my christian family and how are you guys. Please my friends this is endtime and we must try to understand and follow the true doctrines of our lord and saviour Jesus christ. In 1 corinthians 7;39, it stated that 'A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies she is free to marry anyone if she wishes but the husband must belong to God. This message is for people striving to enter heaven. l am in similar situation. My relationship with my children's father reached at the point of life and death. Just like sister osinachi who lost her life. l believe that my own situation was worse. Only God of heaven knows why l am still alive. Maybe my children because l have five children and they were young at the time. Please my friends do what l did, which is stay single. Everyone wants to hear that yes you are free to remarry. However that's not from God of heaven. May our heavenly father have mercy on us amen
Good you quoted that scripture 1 Cor 7:39. It states “A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord.”
1 Corinthians 7:39 NIV
That only happens if they are married. If they are no longer married he is not her husband and it she is not bound to him. Please let’s read to understand scripture not just to quote it. She is only bound to him if he is her husband. If they are divorced how is he her husband?
Listening
What can one do if the church one attends and servers doesn't believe in remarriage after proper divorce?
Thankyou.
@ Pastor K, you did not say anything about what Matthew 5 vs 32 means.
My cousin brother is always complaining that he married wrongly because he was scared of getting married late. He married at 39.
He says rushing into the marriage is his greatest mistake, on his grounds of wanting to get a divorce, he says the wife disrespect him, she doesn't help in some little finances in the house even when she's working. They both work actually.
He would term it as being selfish, she asks him money to buy the least thing as salt and maggi in the house. She starves him of sex, precisely it's been 7 months now, they last made out.
He says she's the complete opposite of who he married, maybe she was pretending he would say.
He has tried having a conversation with her, it's as if it fell on deaf ears.
The first time he brought up the issue with my mum, she told him to endure, that's it's for better for worse, she also called her to explain to her that what she's doing to the husband is not right, but it's as if she doesn't care.
They have a 2 year old daughter and the marriage is 4 years old
In this case MOG, what would you advice him to do please?
Thank you
I dont it was right of him coming to you and your mother for his marital problems. He should have gone to the wive's family or see a professional...
how do I do investigation to see if a divorced man flogged his first wife
Ask his friends and ask her friends too.......find out her name and trace them all to avoid future problems for yourself
Are you having troubles in your relationship or marriage or partner just broke up with you! here is the solution for you.❣ #dragege
The idea that to put way & divorce are 2 separate things is false. Put away & divorce are the same
This is Good thank you PK
Good afternoon pastor Kingsley. This your message is not audible. Thanks
Hello Pastor Kingsley. I admire your teachings, but I am not sure about the way you give reasons for divorce. For example, 1 Cor 7:15 explicitly states that the woman can let the want-away person go, and is not bound to him. However, we need to appreciate the context given by Paul in 1 Cor 7:10-11, where he states that the Lord commanded that if you leave your partner, then you remain single. The fact that one is no longer bound to his/her partner, doesn't mean that the person automatically becomes divorced. We ought to look deeply into the master's design and understand why divorce and separation are used in different circumstances. We may be introducing unscriptural logic when we conclude based on common sense, or when we forcibly imply for the bible. Paul was an astute student of the scriptures, and he must have had a weight of doctrine in his choice of words.
The bible clearly stated that he that marries a divorced woman committed adultery. Can pastor K explain this bible verse