Grief on another level, the loss of a child | Wendy Shannon | TEDxEnniskillen
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- Опубликовано: 13 июл 2022
- Wendys very honest account of grief and loosing her precious daughter. An in dept account of the stages and emotions involved and how to live a life with grief. Wendy is a registered nurse and a wellness advisior This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx
I lost my one and only son on 2/2/2022. I am in a never-ending nightmare. Every time I close my eyes, I see his face looking at me. I woke that day and went through our normal 6 routine, but he had been dead for two hours. I went from pleading with God to being numb. I am inconsolable. Sometimes, I want to just die. I am holding by a thread and leaning on God, and it is taking all the little strength I have.
I am so sorry. I’m here along with you, I just lost my little brother 6 days ago unexpectedly. Worst pain I’ve felt to date. It’s almost unbearable. I understand. Prayers to you and your loved ones.
I also lost my one and only child on 05/20/23. He was only two. I'm trying to be strong but it's not easy.
I'm so sorry, I hope this videos to help you and all the others in this situation, please, don't give up 🙏
To all who have listened to this talk, I am truly grateful and I hope and pray it is helping in your grief journey. I continue to build my life around my grief, and there are still many ‘horrible days’. Love and gratitude to you all. 💜
Thank you for sharing. I lost my youngest daughter on July 21, 2023. She was 23 and we are devastated. Listening to you share your story has helped me. Thank you and may God bless us all.
@@fowlkeskm I am truly sorry to read this. To lose your child is devastating and life changing. Our lives have changed forever and we will never get over our loss, but the thing I do know is that we are not alone. Please take care and reach out for help and support. Thank you for watching my Ted talk. 💜
My journey just started, my 27 yr old daughter passed away unexpectedly and left behind her two lil ones ages 2&6 yrs old , we still aren’t sure what happened and waiting on autopsy report but this is the worst and deepest pain I’ve ever felt and I’m struggling so hard with this and just can’t find a way to ever be ok in living the rest of my life on earth without her 😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢
@@sassysandra245 this is such a shock for you and your family! My heart goes out to you. The pain is horrendous right now and this will be with you for a long time. If at all possible, focus on the children and make sure they are ok. They are very young and will not be able to realise what has happened. Please be kind to yourself and I mean by that, don’t feel you have to be running around, worrying about everyone else, hard as that may sound. This is all so raw for you. Reach out to family and friends for support. You won’t get through this on your own. Please keep in touch, and I am here-day or night 💜xx
I just lost my son a few weeks ago.. this journey is so hard. Love to you and family
Thank you Wendy for sharing, I lost my only child 3 weeks ago to a drug overdose.The pain at times is unbearable. I’m treating myself gently. My daughter was beautiful,smart,compassionate and funny. My sweet girl is beside me cheering me on to find happiness.
Oh Casey, this is heartbreaking! You’re absolutely right. Your beautiful girl will be with you always. You will carry her in your heart, with every breath you take, and no one can harm her there. ❤️🙏
Saying a silent prayer for you Casey, and may your beautiful daughter lay to rest peacefully.
Casey,
Perhaps when you are ready,
You could tell your story and more about your beautiful baby. ❤ I would love to hear what she was like, what her favorite things were.
Your story could help save others, when you’re ready of course. Sending you all my love ❤
@Renee Williams my deepest condolences to you and your family. My heart and love goes out to you. All very raw at the minute for you. Take it one day, hour at a time and reach out to family and friends. 💔
I’m so terribly sorry
I just lost my son 3 weeks ago. My only child. My everything. My love. How do I keep going when all I want to do is to go be with my son? Why? I ask God why? Why my son? What did I do? What did he do? He is love. Isn't love supposed to conquer all? Why not just take me instead? Why doesn't God just send him back to me? I just want to be with my son.
i also feel like this, it’s been almost 3 weeks since I lost my 3 month old
@@emailkirsie sending you love also. Your son is still with you. Love is everything. Love is forever. Believe in God. You will see your son again. 🙏
@@ayashemonet1209 🧡🧡
same questions since I've lost my 12 yr old son due to a car accident 2 mounths ago!💔 heartbroken! he was my pride, my joy, my everything😭 love and miss him so
In this situation right now
My 9 year old son died 10 days ago. Also of multi organ failure from sepsis. A&E missed his burst appendix when I first took him in. I'm struggling to accept it's happened and angry they didn't pick it up. I can't stop thinking of my beautiful boy and why this happened. He was so special.
Really sad to hear this. My beautiful daughter is 2 months old and she has Leigh's Disease she is in ICU for past 3 weeks and doctor said that their is no cure for her. I'm preparing myself for the worst which I can see it's coming. I'm trying to get to know how I will manage that pain, that trauma and how long it will take to get out from trauma.
I'm so sorry for you and the other users in Thai situation ❤ you're a very strong and brave person for keep going, please, never give up, made your son to be proud of you❤❤
Lost my son last year 18 of Feb to suicide what a vibrant boy I lost 🥺 the pain is undescribable and as the man, husband and father I have to keep my self intact for my family I wonder will we eva get past his death
Andrew, an awful tragedy! You will never get over it. You will move through it, and will live with it for ever. 2 years on, I still can’t accept Rachael is gone, but I have accepted I will be grieving for the rest of my life. 💕
@andrewkock2537 I lost my 17 year old son through suicide on 26 October. I do not think that I will ever get over it. I am just looking for ways to survive.
I'm so sorry ❤ you're such an great and strong person ❤️ please, don't give up, learn from the past remember him, and build a better future
I lost my only son ,23, to shallow water drowning caused by him doing breathing exercises and becoming unconscious while in the pool. I was in the pool with him and I carried him out a gave him cpr while I called paramedics. We never got one vital sign from him. He was my life and reason for being. We have never been apart since he was born. This loss is beyond anything I could ever imagine.
I am so sorry for your precious loss. You were with your son and did everything you could, but none of this will make sense to you in your heartbroken grief. I understand your pain. Only those who have lost children can. Please be gentle with yourself, be still. Unfortunately pain is all part of this horrendous process. 💜
Don't worry, anything that you're feeling it's normal and alright, it happens in all the grief, you just need to keep going 🙏 make him to be proud of you❤
What’s odd is how you can have good days, and then one day, you tragically fall into darkness. I am not sure if there is a way out of it. You just have to appreciate the good days.
Jonathan, this journey is for life, and there is no way out of it. I am finding meditation in particular is helping a little, and also journaling is really helpful-writing down your feelings, whatever they are.
Agreed absolutely agreed....
That is me.. 6.5 years and I still struggle from losing my only son.
@@malyhe2007 I am so sorry. It’s different for everyone, I won’t pretend to know your pain. I lost my daughter and everyday it hurts more than the day before.
I feel this, I lost my oldest Son 10 months ago and it still feels like yesterday. I still can't explain this to anyone because not just everyone has lived this, I don't want everyone to want anyone to ever have to feel what I feel. I miss my Son. I miss his voice . His birthday will be next month and it's excruciating to know this. I feel your Pain and your Sadness.
Angella, it is so heartbreaking and only we know as grieving parents, really feel the pain and devastation. On Rachael’s first anniversary, I went to one of her favourite places with family and released Disney balloons into the night sky. She loved all things Disney. Then we went home, had a cake and sang Happy Birthday to her. This may be something for you to think of…that night, going to bed, I had a complete feeling of calmness 💜
I lost my precious 3 year old almost 3 weeks ago due to cardiac arrest. I can’t believe I have to live without her. Nothing seems real anymore
Your loss is unbearable as we all know sharing our stories with each other, and we are not alone in our grief. I am sure 3 months on it is no easier for you, and unfortunately we have to go through this unbearable pain, with all the physical and psychological trauma that grief brings. This will take some time, and you must ride the wave, because you will come to a stage where that will become tolerable. It never goes away and almost 3 years later, I still feel the pain and devastation of losing my beautiful daughter. Just take each day at a time for now, lean in on family and friends, peace mindfulness-breathwork and meditation work best for me, but find what works for you. When you do these things, you are being kind to yourself, and you have made quiet space for your daughter. 💜💜
I am 3 weeks into the sudden loss of my daughter at 20. This is immense, but I'm expected to be back hospice nursing and functioning like my heart didn't just get ripped in two. I needed this acknowledgement and hope. When I think I can't do it another day, I will pull from somewhere and do it for Olivia.
How brave you are , but I am sorry you can’t get much more time off to grieve your tremendous loss.
@@librarylover6414 thank you. I trudged along for a few months until I thought I would break. Then took some time to grieve and now have a new job lined up that I start soon. One step at a time.
I have lost my son ,Nathaniel, aged 30 to a self road accident in January of this year. He was a handsome young man, an architect, musician, a Photographer, and liked bikes - which ended his colorful life. The Loss is indescribable- I wish not to live - thats the only way to get over and be done with the pain of the loss. And yes , thats no solution to the loss, life must go on till its my time to be gone from the world . Your journey of grief is familiar to all those grieving , it touches each one of us in a manner that it gives us reason and hope to live the rest of our lives , till we are one with our departed . God Bless .
My dear sweet son, at age 36, left Earth almost five years ago. He was the second child I have buried. His older sister died long ago, 18 months before he was born. I had to grieve for her in silence. That’s how things were in 1980. Nobody talked about death then, least of all my husband at the time. He told me I could cry for two weeks and then I must stop. My son is now with his sister in the Heavenly Cosmos, and my surviving 3 children are on their long painful journeys without their dear brother. Shortly after my son Crossed Over to the Heavenly Cosmos, I was diagnosed with a terminal disease. I’m in my 70th year. I was already disabled, and unable to walk, before the terminal diagnosis with a progressing neurodegenerative disease. I am actually glad that my journey on Earth is winding down, but still, the grief and sorrow has constantly consumed me, everyday since my son left Earth. And once again, there is no one to talk to because in this country where I live now, it’s extremely taboo to talk about death. Like the first time, I turned to books on grieving for solace and comfort. There’s much more acceptance now to write and talk about Near Death Experiences, about visitations from loved ones, signs from loved ones, and so on. And so many wonderful new authors are writing about this part of the Earthly Journey. But-this time there are also wonderful, warm, sincere, honest-from-the-heart presentations on the internet, like yours, my dear friend, for which I am forever grateful. Thank you❤dearly. It’s not easier because I had already lost a child. It’s worse. I only now feel like I’m starting to accept what happened. I have cried everyday for almost five years. I’m looking forward to the grand reunion in the Heavenly Cosmos. I have two children waiting for me, and my parents, a sister, my grandparents….
Praying for you 🙏
God bless you. I am so sorry. Your grief is valid, I know all too well. Prayers to you and your family.
@@wendyshannon789 Thank you very much❤
@@ellebeauty8737 Thank you very much❤
❤
I lost my only son 3 years ago and 18 days ago, he was 16...... there is no comfort, it has been so bad ...... I love him so much. In the path I have found amazing parent with the same pain. There was a moment when I realized the impact on other people: I lost my son, but my parents lost a grandson and in somehow a daughter, my nice a cousin, my sisters a nephew,...... everything changed since that day. Only God knows how and why I am still here.
I'm so sorry❤ I hope this videos to help you and everything's to get a little better ❤find the company, cheers and other things like that with your family and with this kind of videos and please, never give up, you can heal yet not forget your child❤
It seems like no one understands you when as mom you grieve for a child....my son dj died from covid June 30th, 2020. He was 39...I cried for him still he was a handsome, kindhearted, loving person, a musician. 🎶 The heartache is so real.
Will, I am so sorry to hear about your Son. I have a son, aged 33 and still regard him as my child. The only ones who understand are those of us who go through this horrible journey. Sending love to you. ❤️
I’m so sorry. It hurts so much. The heartache is real. Four and a half years ago my 36 year old son left this Planet and Crossed Over to the Divine Eternal Comfort, Peace, and Joy of the Heavenly Cosmos. He was a big shining Light; his big happy smile always made everyone feel better. He was humble and generous to all, a gentle soul, and a gentleman. It sounds like your dear son and my dear son were very much alike. The sadness, sorrow, and pain never goes away. It is forever a permanent fact of our lives. A permanent part of our story, a permanent part of our journey on this Planet. People say “You must move on.” But why? It will always be a fact of who we are. Eventually we learn to journey on, to move forward. We even learn to smile again, to laugh again-but “moving on?” No. That’s the same as telling us that we must put our sons’ lives behind us, put them in a drawer somewhere, and never talk about them again. Actually, our sons are still in our lives, and will always be in our lives. And eventually we will all be united again, in the grand reunion of the Second Journey, the Eternal Journey. But the heartache is always there.
I'm so sorry ❤ 😞 you and the persons that keep going after this are very admirable ❤ please, never give up
Also lost my 10 yr old son, 4 months ago. So painful until now, feels like I'm just living now in a nightmare that I want to wake up.
Raeli, it is very early days for you and it is all so very raw. Lean in on your family and friends. Take support and strength from them. So sorry for you loss. 🙏
Lost my 25 year old 14 days ago! I am so changed!
I feel exactly the same way. Waking up to a nightmare.
Sending you love .
I send us all the strength to get through this. I honor my son, he was 17. He was the happiest child I have ever one. He was severely autistic, newly epileptic. It has only been a week. I am doing my best.
Same here I lost my 11yr old daughter 12/18/23. My only child. Im devastated (hugs)
I hear you. I understand you. I am on a journey of tragic grief as well. Thank you for helping me to feel “normal” when everyone seems to think this is a psychiatric condition. Sending you healing, love and blessings.
Kristina, I am so glad this has helped. No, we’re not going crazy. Returning healing and love. X
I needed to hear this. I’m approaching the one-year anniversary of my son’s death and I’ve been wondering if I’ve completely lost my mind. Migraines headaches, chronic fatigue, nausea all of it. Thank you for making me feel normal and understanding that what I am experiencing is normal.
Erin, I totally understand. I thought I was going crazy too, until my doctor reassured me. It is the most horrible feeling and it affects every system in your body. ❤
I’m so sorry to everyone that lost a child. I lost my 22 year old nephew in 2022 and I will never be the same. One thing I struggle to deal with how heartless other people can be with rude comments or just expecting us to get over this pain, this pain will never go away. The grief still comes in waves.
I'm trying to make space for my grief, but also keep fighting for the great memories. It's a day to day thing. My heart goes out to anyone dealing w grief. I'm w you.
It is a difficult thing to accept you need to make space to grieve but by creating that space, I have found that when I visit Rachael’s grave, it helps me to give her better attention if that makes sense? My thoughts are with you and your family 💔
I am with you. No parent should bury their child. As a nurse I know how hard they worked to get him back. It was not possible. He has a seizure and his heart stopped. My life is forever changed.
In 1976 our only child died of heart disease; he was five days old. I still find validation (and yes some odd mixture of comfort and sadness that my feelings are understood by others) from every honest, heartbreaking testimony to personal grief; yours was no exception. I have never reached a state of acceptance, but I have made space for my grief. Thank you for sharing your journey with us.
gNancy, I am so sorry you lost your beautiful baby son. Yes, any death of a child is heartbreaking and this journey is horrendous, but we have to make space for our grief. Thank you for your kind comments.
It doesn’t mater, 5 days, or 50 year, your loss no less significant, or painful. Praying for comfort and peace.
Nancy, 3 years on I still have not reached acceptance in its full capacity. I hope you are healing and taking care of you. Sending love to you 💜
You are describing so much of what I have experienced, although my son was 21. I started working very quickly afterwards, helping others and staying busy, along with the brain fog/bad sleep/bad eating/putting on a brave face for others/'bad days'/reliving that day and the days & weeks before it. It has been 10 months and I have crashed and hit the wall. Part of me suspects the worst is yet to come and I'm afraid of the months and years to come. I miss him and he is never out of my thoughts. A wonderful big brother, exceptionally clever, empathic. It is like a train coming towards you and you have no choice at all. I have tried to honestly allow and make space for the bad days, so I can let the grieving happen. Thanks for your suggestion of having a framework for gentle self care. Thank you for your generous vulnerability.
Andy, I feel this is like a mirror image of me. This is exactly what grief is like and how we feel. You will hit many a train, like I have and I know that is going to be such a bad few days/weeks, but it does pass- until the next one. Yes, be kind to you and do what works for you. Some days it is just being still, as you have no energy or motivation to do anything else. Take care ❤
I listen to Moms of Kids of all ages...a Mom is a Mom. A child is a child. It doesn't make this easier. Your in this " Club". Regardless. My son was 37. I had a my best friend lose her only Son 3 years ago and she called me that night, I was horrified and so saddened for her, but I didn't shirk nor did I once make her feel pathetic or uncomfortable. I stood by her and was there. She's been a rock as well. She told me, well guess your part of the club now, I'm like what club? She told me. She said, it's not a club any Mom or Dad wants to be here by choice, but here it is. Your here. We help. We know what your going through, we been there.
I loss my daughter at the age of 27 to a car accident October 2nd 2021. It broke my heart to pieces. I was so hurt for my other children especially her older sister that’s blind. They were so close. November 30th I lost my oldest sister. I don’t have words for my pain. I have God to look to, my faith rescues me. But there are times I just can’t make it, then power comes again. I say everyday Lord help us
Sherine, such sad news. Two major losses in your life. Your heart is surely breaking. I hope you are getting professional help. We’ve all had to go there. ❤
@@wendyshannon789 yes I am ❤️🩹
Feb 12 is my birthday. I will now be thinking of your daughter, possibly each year. I'll be 29 this Feb. So close to her age.
Nikia, how lovely of you to do that. ❤
My son passed away last December 22 2022 due to sepsis. He was just 14, a very handsome boy, academically fit , a devout Christian. I will meet him in paradise
🙏
Gilbert, another shocking read due to sepsis being the cause of death. The only consolation I can take from my daughters death is that it was so quick she would never have known a thing about it….but we do. Still heartbroken and devastated, 2 years on. Still surreal 💜
My 17 year old son was murdered 8 years ago and I still feel devastated .
JP, the pain never leaves us ❤
Thank you Wendy. I lost my 18 year old daughter unexpectedly last year. I took this week off for a staycation but instead have found my heart heavy in another wave of grief. I was just talking with someone about what that self care would look like. I don't know yet. It has been quite challenging finding support as well. That said, your Ted talk confirmed some of the ideas of self care and that it is ok to have bad days. I honestly don't know what to do with myself sometimes. Hugs from across the pond.
Ingrid, I am so sorry for your loss. Your grief will come in waves and you have to work through it, doing whatever is comfortable for you. I have found meditation very beneficial and also journaling, as writing down how you are feeling-good and bad-also helps. My heart is with you ❤️
YES! Finding professional support IS the greatest hurdle in my experience. Everyone if "full".
Thank you for sharing, I lost my son of 14 a month ago, 8/28/22, to a tragic bicycle accident, it’s been devastating for me as a mother. It’s something that is so hard to bare, I am still numb, trying to get back to some normalcy, it’s just been hard. Thank you again for this message, ❤🙏🕊
Maribel, so sad to read this. It really is devastating even trying to process what has happened. What you are feeling is all part of this horrible situation called grief, and it doesn’t make sense. Sending you love and prayers 🙏❤️
You're such an strong and brave woman, I'm sure that this haved helped a lot of people ❤
Sorry for your loss.❤😢
So courageous Wendy to share your experience of loss with the world. This is a powerful talk!
Thank you so much Camilla! X
Thank you wendy...I lost my 23 year old son for sarcoma...when I listened to you I felt as if I m taking about my son..the pain is eternal
My deepest condolences to you Leena. This is not an easy journey. I hope you have got a little comfort from this ❤
Lost my son to mental illness few months ago- shot to death by a cop - a coward cop-
But his life was not much of a life for a few years already- he is for sure in a better place now- I pray for his soul several times every day
David, so sorry to read this. Such a cruel way to lose your son. So unavoidable. No matter what way his life was, he was still your son, and losing a child is the wrong way round. Look after yourself and lean in on friends and family ❤🙏
Thank you so much for telling us about your journey. My daughter who was nearly two years old passed away 3 months ago, suddenly. I feel like it’s only now it’s starting to feel real. There is comfort in knowing you are not alone. Sending you so much love
I am so sorry to hear of your beautiful daughters untimely and shocking death. You are definitely not alone in your grief, and you will be in my thoughts and prayers. It’s hard to know how we will get through this pain, but I know that my daughter and I will be reunited- not yet, but it will happen 🙏💔
My son died when he was 3 months old. I was answering the front door when he stopped breathing. His cod was determined to be sids. That was September 30, 2016.
I still struggle. I have other small children so making space for personal grief and self care is excessively difficult. I have also developed overwhelming anxiety. I'm scared one of my other children will unexpectedly die. I keep going. Searching for the calm in this chaos.
Thank you for taking the time to talk about your daughter. You are helping so many people.
Krystal, I am so sorry to read this, and yes, I also have feelings of impending doom for my remaining child. It is hard not to think like that a Haven you have suffered immeasurable loss. My thoughts are with you. Be kind to yourself ❤
Thank you for sharing your Rachel with us, my close friend lost her son at 3.5 bouncing at inflatable world and hitting his head. We were pregnant together and spent out maternity leave together. Since the accident I have watched an amazing vibrant hilarious woman turn into a shell of a human, and I don’t know what to do or say, I don’t want to talk about him and leave her feeling worse, but I don’t want to not talk about him either. I love her so much, and I miss her son terribly too. Time with the people we love is all that really matters at the end of the day.
What a tragic thing to have happened Camille. Just be there for your friend. A simple hug is sometimes enough. It is important to talk about her son, but on her terms. As time passes, your friend will talk more, as I have about Rachael. I could talk about her all day now! ❤
I lost my sweet caring son last week. I found him on his kitchen floor ,I think from a drug over dose. He had been dead for about a day. He was cold and no one by his side as he died. He was 39 yrs old with a 6 yr old little boy..
My life stopped when saw him .He was my best friend who I tried to help for the past 9 years. I am gutted and do not know how to breath. I do not think i will be able to live without him. I wish I was dead. I need to be with him. Please Lord help me
My deepest condolences to you on your loss and so traumatic for you to find your son. As a mother, You did what you could for your son to help him, but that pales into insignificance now. Whilst your son has now found peace, you need to grieve. Right now there is pain and it is excruciating. In time this will lessen, but as time passes, you will grow around your grief. Please take time and lean in on those around you. 💜
I'm so sorry for everyone's losses!!!! I lost all 4 of my children between 6-24weeks of pregnancy in 2014-2015. Listening to Wendy confirms that our losses may all be different but our pain is the same. Being a Loss parent is the hardest role you will ever have in your life. So many thoughts, hugs and tears to everyone from Micah's Alison's Heidi's and Noah's Forever Mama!!!!
Amber, I am so sorry! Yes, it really is a very tough, if not impossible situation. Sending you lots of love and hugs for your beautiful babies 👶
Big hug my dear . I lost my 22 yrs old son 6 weeks ago.
@@MaryMary-xp2lb so very sorry to read this. I am thinking about you and sending you love and prayers 🙏❤️
I am still in pain, and I cry almost every day. My heart is broken shattered, and devastated sad and grief stricken after losing my baby/son two months ago. I have lost interest in living. I have lost faith in God and it's more of evidence that he doesn't exist. Worst part of losing a child is that I don't know what happened for everything was fine when he was in my womb and doctors claim that they don't know either. I was put to sleep and nobody was there at the operation room to witness what happened during my c section. I feel helpless wronged and betrayed. I don't have an explanation as to what happened to my baby am still waiting for the autopsy report.
Praying for you and your loss Tashi 🙏❤️
Lost my beautiful, witty and lively 16yo just six days ago to cystic fibrosis. I have slept these nights praying to dream of him. However, the ache of grief gets overpowered by the force of celebration that looks like a natural course of a life well- lived.
Najia, so very sorry to read this. Cystic fibrosis is a life limiting condition, but it is no easier, even when you know the eventual outcome. It is very very raw for you. Please lean in on your family and friends in these early days. ❤
I lost my 15 yo son 2 months ago. I am so sorry. I wish I could hug you.
@@rachelg9075 sending you hugs. A huge loss, I know. ❤️
I lost my beautiful boy 2 months back , I pray that I dream of him every night
I ask God for his mercy , otherwise I can’t make it through this river of fire
@@rachelg9075 , I wish we could make a bond over this bereavement. Much love to you.
There are so many people stronger than me. Love you guys and thank you for
Strength is something that comes with time. I do not know what stage of grief you are at but please take care and be kind to you. Let family and friends support you through this difficult time. Your strength will return. You will be a different person and you will be stronger. 💜
I cant even imagine this
Don’t even try to. It’s unbearable 😢
Thank you Ma'am. My 14 year old son died the same death just over a year ago. I feel crippled by grief. Exactly as you said, physical, mental, emotional. Everything feels broken and depleted. I too am trying to "make friends" with my grief. Self care does feels selfish but I am learning every single day that I NEED it.
Jenne, so sorry to hear this. It takes time to heal and it is ongoing. Self care is so important, but do what works for you ❤
Only 3 hours in ER and I lost him
Loss of my beautiful son , dying alone within 3 hours
I can’t process, im in so much pain it’s unbelievable
Mehreen, this is heartbreaking to read this. My daughter passed through ER before transferring to CCU, then died. My heart is breaking for you. You are not alone in your grief, and will be in my thoughts and prayers 🙏
@@wendyshannon789 you will be in mine
I can’t sleep without medication I cry all the time I don’t know whether to look at his things which brings more tears or store them away
I see his fingers , I see his feet in his slippers, I keep seeing his videos playing guitar etc and I can’t believe he is gone
I don’t know how to move on I’m standing there in unbearable pain where he left me
He was the most handsome brilliant boy and cutest kid ever
I have lost interest in life nothing holds any pleasure or significance
I’m just dragging this body’s around and counting down days till we meet again
There were no pre-existing conditions , 2 months and we r still waiting for autopsy report
Medical record said that blood oxygen was low but no COVID
One day he is texting I’ll call u tomorrow promise and next day I hear he is gone
I thought I was close to God the merciful, but now I’m bewildered and feel betrayed
I don’t know how to pray I’m scared
My son JayShawn died this way 3 weeks ago. His heart failed and we had no idea he had a heart condition. We are devastated 💔 God bless you, thank you for sharing 🙏🏽❤️
I am so sorry for your loss. It’s also a shock to discover he had an underlying condition and this can only be picked up when something goes wrong. Much love and prayers to you. Such a difficult time. 🙏
Thank you I myself lost my daughter due to heart complications after surgery and I completely understand the deep grief and pain 💔. Her lose completely changed me and I also am a nurse and returned back to work way too soon .
Cindy, I totally get you. I returned to work 6 weeks after losing Rachael, to my detriment, but financially I had no choice. I honestly don’t know if staying at home a little longer would have helped, because I still have ‘horrible days’. Please know you are not alone and reach out for help. 💜
Thank you and I'm sorry. 2018 I lost my 28 yr old son to a car accident. My family is in turmoil still. Wife and younger son turned to alcohol. I reached out to where ever I could. 6 months ago my dad and brother were taken 12 hrs apart. That only intensified the loss of my son. With all the help it still didn't prevent my quadruple bypass. I keep on searching.
Jeff, you are going through such pain. Multiple losses. I really can’t imagine what you are going through. My thoughts are with you. ❤
Oh god !
May you find some strength.
I lost my son . He was only 24 . The pain is terrible
@@lyjuslyjus2201 the pain is awful. 💔
What a wonderful message of hope after dealing with such a tragic loss!
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I lost my rainbow baby 11days ago, now I can't even bring myself to pray to God, when I lost the first one(stillborn), it didn't hurt this much, but this time, my heart hurts so much it feels like it's gonna explode . he was supposed to be 9months on 14th of this month, it hurts so bad when I hear people say, God will bring another, he already watch me lose two babies, how am I supposed to believe that 😢
Yes, you really do wonder why these things happen. I am so feeling your pain, as I know someone who has also lost 2 children and see how she suffers. My heart goes out to you. Take care of you in the first instance. It is all still very raw. God can wait. ❤️
Oh gosh this is really traumatic.....can't imagine what this must be like for you 😣 Sending loads of love ❣️ God knows better and He will give you strength to deal with this.....
I too have experienced the death of both of my children. Both boys died at age 4. It is devastating. I know your pain. May our lives end very soon.
@@leahbel25 so sorry to hear this. May your heart heal 🙏
@@leahbel25 ohhh am sorry we're going through this. No mother deserves to go through this pain let alone twice 😢
I loss my girl4 years old from Brain cancer. 2 years after loss her is the same for me.😢😔
The pain never leaves us. We will miss them forever. We will carry our precious angels in our hearts with every breath we take. 💜
I am going thru the same.
Thanks for sharing.
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My 18 year old daughter committed suicide 6 weeks ago , it came out of no where the pain is indescribable never ending, if it was not for my other children I would have committed suicide myself I'm still not sure if I can make it...
John, this has to be the worst cause of a young death. My heart reaches out to you, and much worse when there were no signs evident. These are very tough and raw days for you and your family. Try and focus on them. They need you. And take it literally one day, hour, minute at a time. My love and thoughts are with you and your family 🙏💔
Hold on
Hey John, truly sorry for your loss, my 24 year old son- James killed himself on 9.9.06- 16 years ago, l just wanted you to know l feel your pain- l am living your pain, please survive for your other children- that's what kept me going too- for 16 years now. Many times l wanted to give up and l asked myself- what would James want me to do? He'd want me to live my life- not go down the same road he chose, l will see him again soon enough when it's my time- but not yet, the same goes for you. Just keep living John- until you feel alive again- l hope you make it.
Claire, thank you so much for sharing your story and your kind thoughts. I know this journey is for life. ❤
I read a book called Reasons to Stay Alive by Matt Haig. I understand that pull to leave and the difficulty sometimes of accepting people's advice to stay for the people who love you. He talks about choosing to stay for you, and for the future versions of you that you are yet to meet. Also read It's OK That You're Not OK by Megan Devine. She is on youtube and is very grounding in the things she shares. I also read a blog by a Christian woman who lost her son. At the end of her posts she writes 'Lord, save me from myself' which always reassures me that I'm not alone in this fight to stay.
Thank you Wendy.
You are very welcome 🙏
I lost my beautiful daughter, nine months ago, It's been the darkest, saddest and most horrible period of my life, I'm at my lowest now, I can't eat or sleep properly I became a body with no soul. I need to change for my two living kids right now I'm not being a parent to them, listening to this gives hope. Thank you for sharing Wendy!
I am so sorry to read this. Deep grief is so debilitating and effects every part of you being. Unfortunately you need to go through this horrible pain before you even begin to feel hope, but you will. Give yourself permission to grieve your loss. You will never accept your loss but you will accept your grief will be forever. Once you get your head around that, you can then start to rebuild by doing what is right for you. I have followed my path and I am now a grief coach, helping others navigate this horrendous journey. Please take care of YOU 💜
Very sad and very wise words from this lady re grief. I lost my mother in May which is at least in the natural order of things, cannot imagine this lady's pain from losing a child. Rachel sounded a wonderful person with all her community involvement.
Roisin, thank you so much for your kind words. Yes, it is the wrong way round to lose a child, and I send deepest condolences to you on losing your precious Mother. Yes, she was a wee superstar and loved by everyone who met her. ❤
Lost my 26 year old son , we were out of the country, he only had flu
Next day he had difficulty breathing
Strolling through RUclips looking for some comfort! It’s been 7 weeks since my beautiful Daughter Cayden Josephine age 18 freshman at UC college her and her roommate were walking into campus in a marked cross walk a teen 17 stolen a car didn’t stop had hit both of them my daughter unfortunately didn’t survive her injuries ! It’s a parents worst nightmare . She was only on campus for 6 weeks, I was already a nervous wreck 😰 sending her off she was my only daughter, child for 16 years. 1st love and we were mom/daughter bestie! I have a 2 year old son but he doesn’t replace her
Keisha, I am so sorry for your loss, and it is a mothers worst nightmare losing a child to an unavoidable death. If only these people knew the carnage they were leaving behind. I hope, or would suggest that you speak to a professional. This is profound. I had two breakdowns before I sought counselling and wish I’d done it earlier. Please try and be kind to yourself ❤
@@wendyshannon789 Thank You and Yes I starting Counseling! ❤️
What a heart wrenching and moving Talk Wendy! My love and heart goes out to you. ❤️
Thank you Beautiful Wani!
Thank you for making me feel “normal”. It’s been 2 1/2 years since my son passed and I’m still not good I think about him constantly 😢
I’m sorry 😞 and I’m sorry for her may you heal 🙏🏾
Thank you Maryam. This means a lot 🙏
Thank you for sharing Wendy. I had a lump in my throat listening to you talking about your beautiful daughter Rachel 😢 a painful journey 💔wish you well xxx
Gledwith1, thank you so much for your kind words. They mean a lot 💜
wow, heart breaking and sad
Thank you for sharing your journey..you are right - you can never get over grief, you just have to make space for it. I lost my 6 month old daughter about 2 months back and it is devastating....your video brought tears in my eyes....a loss is a loss and it hits real hard....but like you said the only option we have is to keep going!
To lose a child is a tragedy we will never get over. The pain of grief is devastating. Please know you are not alone in your struggle ❤
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Wendy i watched this live and you received a standing ovation. You will help so many with this talk. Im so extremerly sorry for your loss. Love and blessings always. My husband in 2020 nearly died from sepsis it was a long road back and now we are going through cancer. Thank you for sharing it is deep grief.
Juan, proud never have to apologise for anything. I understand your worry, and I think your Mom is a very lucky lady to have you in her life. Try not to overthink things in terms of your panic attacks, and do those things you have been taught, to manage them. I know it is not easy, having suffered myself, but try and be strong for your beautiful Mom 💜
I lost my 14 yr old son Thomas to accute asthma attack. May 23rd 2016 . I feel everyone's pain
Thank you for sharing and your understanding ❤
Dawnie, I am so very sad for you. I named my son Thomas also. I have always loved that name so much. I can’t imagine how terrifying it was to lose your son Thomas to asthma. My heart hurts so much for you. My son Thomas left this Planet at age 36. Nobody ever expects to be in this horrible “club.”
God bless you,
And God bless you too 🙏
Thank you...just thank you. X
I am glad you found the talk helpful. Take care and I will be thinking about you 💜
6 years ago my son died i still cry every day, he got bowel cancer he was just a kid still, 16 years previous he was asulted and brutally beaten left in a coma, sustained brain injury had to learn to talk walk etc his life was so hard. He was starting to get over it a wee bit when he got sick I took him to doctors hospital over and over again but was sent away with nothing done not even checked he got so sick and had lost more than half the blood from his body, he had bowel cancer but because they left it so long it spread, James died 2 years later a long painful death that has mentally scarred me, I blame myself for not making them listen I have flash backs and panic attacks he was my wee mate and his 2 brothers we loved each other so much I don't know how to cope I hope and pray God has him it's the only thing that makes me feel better just the thought of him happy with God please pray for me
Annemarie, this is just a horrible journey for you. Awful to hear about the assault and then the cancer. And you will cry for the rest of your life. Allow yourself to cry. I do hope you are talking to a grief counsellor. I have found this helps me to process my grief but it will never leave us. Thinking of you. ❤️🙏
Thank you for sharing your story. I had searched for talks on grief and didn’t expect you would be sharing an experience of Noonan’s too. My daughter Lottie was born at 32w5d with Noonan’s Syndrome on the 15th of January. It was a routine pregnancy up until then and her scans had always come back looking healthy. We had never heard of it and aren’t carriers ourselves. She was born with hydrops from it and never fully recovered, despite being in the NICU for nearly 8 weeks and at some points in that journey seeming to improve. She was the most beautiful girl and lit up our world. We spent every day in there with her, holding her hand and comforting her however we could. I’m so sorry you lost your girl from Noonan’s related health problems too. I want to spend my life raising awareness about Noonan’s but I’m not sure how. If you know how I could be involved please do let me know. I’m so lost without her and I know it’s all I can really do in her memory. I have no other children; it took many years to conceive Lottie and we are now terrified of both not having any children but also having another with a condition that ends their life. Sending so much love.
Ash, I am so sorry for the loss of your beautiful Lottie. Noonan Syndrome is very similar in its characteristics to Turners Syndrome, and yes there are lots of complications. Rachael is as very susceptible to infection and we spent many years attending all sorts of Consultants due to her not reaching milestones, normal growth and mild learning difficulties but she was a wee sweetheart and like you, we miss her terribly! I also researched Noonan Syndrome and in the UK, there is very little out there. To honour my beautiful Rachael, I founded The Grief Lens, and have become a grief coach. I am on SM. Please take care and know you are in my thoughts. 💜
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I don't even know where to begin, I chose this video because my sister died 2 years ago. Although she was my sister when she died it was like losing a child. My sister had intellectual delays, was non verbal and needed a lot care also physical limitations. She died of a massive stroke but just the day before she was smiling and her normal self. Things are still a blur. The care she required was like taking care of a child and a lot of people called her my first child (I have 2 boys). Others said you are her mother although we know you are the sister. My heart is still broken to this day. Our mom passed 21 years prior to my sister. My boys lost their dad 4 months before my sister (who died on his birthday). So many emotions still and it has been 2 years. Thank you Wendy for this. I am currently trying to hold in my own grief and be there for my children who are young and younger when their father died. Sorry all that I wrote so much.
Thank you for sharing your story. Your sister was very lucky to have you in her life, and to care for her. I appreciate how difficult this was, but you did a wonderful job of caring for her. Your loss is devastating and please know that l am thinking about you. Take care of you now. Your beautiful sister would want that. Be kind to you. We will never get over this grief but will grow our lives around it. This takes time 💜
@wendyshannon789 ..I'm crying as I am reading your response. Thank you for your kind words. You stay blessed.
I’m sorry to all the parents who lost their children/s my deepest condolences may they rest in peace. I’m not a parent myself but a son to my mom. I suffer from panic attacks and to those who don’t know what a panic attack is, it’s a feeling that you’re dying. Panic attacks mimic heart attack so it’s not the best feeling. Anyways, I’m watching this video because I’m afraid and scared for my mother that she may lose me soon. I made peace that I will die and I’m okay with that. I’m just worry my mother won’t ever be the same or go depressed once I’m gone. I love her so much she is my world. We talked about this before and how she be strong for my siblings if it were to occur but it’s not the same when I’m actually gone. I’m grateful for each day I have with my family and I pray to God for many more. Sorry for the long post.
Thank you for sharing your experience. Panic attacks are so scary. I hope you have sought medical help so that you can be there for your mom. As a grieving mom, the pain of losing your child is life changing. I sincerely hope you get help💜
About 4 months ago, I lost my daughter 2 days after she was born. She was a beautiful girl, but born with Costello Syndrome, a genetic disorder with a very high mortality rate. Hearing someone else talk about the harsh realities of grieving such a massive loss gives such a sense of community and compassion, and it is such a relief to know that I am not alone, and that others have survived this loss.
I have not heard of Costello Syndrome, and I am so very sorry for your loss. As I have said many times before and in this talk, I will never accept our loss, but I have accepted this grief is forever. In an ironic way, this has helped me deal with my grief, but it is still horrendous. Next month, Rachael Would have been 30 years old. Yet another date to deal with. It is never ending, and we, as a family, will surround each other with Rachael’s love, and we will sing Happy Birthday to her and eat cake. 🎂
Please take care of yourself-self care is never selfish💜
Thank you Wendy, I loss my Son almost 15month, thank you for this speech, it's helpful,
So sorry for your loss.❤
I am so very sorry for your loss. I sincerely hope it has helped you in your healing journey. We are not alone in this. I hope you are taking care of you. It is early days but I firmly believe self care is key. 💜
Thank you for sharing this. My daughter died a month ago and I am deep in struggling. She was only two.
Like, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. I am heartbroken for you. So raw. ❤️
My daughter was killed 2 months ago. She was 48. I feel like I am still in shock most of the time.
Angelina, I am so very sorry to read this. It is such a shock for you and your family. Please know you are in my thoughts. Please take care of YOU.. ❤️
@@wendyshannon789 🧡
My thoughts are with you ❤️
More than 2 month I lost my 11 years old doughter to suicide. She was sick, but her death was a shock for all of us. Thank you for your words, Im in my grive since the begining, not trying to "work" it just to put as much care as I can when the pain is there and breath and rest when the wave is away. People are saying different things like move on, live for others, be hopefull you meet her again. I dont care. I lost my sweet child and I will grive but as you say the way that lead to healing. Thank you for remaining me that the question why should be turn into what and how! Sending you love! God bless you!
Dorota, so young! My heart goes out to you💜you do not move on from grief. It is here forever but what I teach now in my grief coaching sessions, is that you try and build your new life around your grief. It is only 2 months since your bereavement and it is very early days for you. You need to take it a day, hour, minute at a time and it is painful, but acknowledge that pain and do what is rotgut for you. Please reach out. There is help out there, including me. 💜
I'm so sorry for all your loss. I would like to say that there's a future promise of a resurrection. I can just picture you all babies waking up and running into your arms. What a wonderful joyful day that will be, but for now, keep the memories and the remaining members of your families close.
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Thank you for your help and the talk. I lost my 28 year old daughter last year to suicide. I'm completely devastated and heartbroken. My life will never be the same. Trying to find hope. Thank you again for your vulnerability. So sorry for your loss..
Jenny, so sorry to hear about your daughter m. It is truly tragic and how to get your head around suicide is yet on another level. Please take care of yourself and I hope you are talking to a professional? ❤
@@wendyshannon789 yes, I am seeing a therapist and it's helped so much to just be able to speak about it..
@@jennycottrill1739 yes, it does help , as you can open up much more to a therapist. I will be thinking about you in the time ahead. Please let me know how you are doing 💜
My son was murdered on the 17/06/2021
He was murdered the day after I was with him and told him have a great day make good choices I love you my darling
The next day he was gone someone decided to kill my baby my last born child the one who loved me so much someone killed him on the 17/06/2021
My life will never be the same I miss him so much I feel sick to my stomach that my boy is GONE
Vina, I’ve studied death of our children, murder is clearly the worst. So sorry for your loss, will pray for some comfort and peace for you!😢❤
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My 17 year old was murdered 2016. It is unbearable . Thinking of you.
@@j.p77 it really is unbearable. You are also in my thoughts 💙
Thank you for this. I lost my nephew Dec 14th 2021, close to a year. He was like a son to me, we hung out a lot. He was 18. His mother, my sister, is also a nurse of 30yrs. I am worried for as she buries herself in her work to deflect the hurt, especially when you're a nurse & you lose your child under your watch. Thank you for this, we are not alone even though it feels like it.
Jose, I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Yes, as nurses, we tend to care for others, which is what we were trained to do, but for me, this has been the most challenging thing- to care for me first. Selfcare is so important. ❤️
Jose, I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Yes, as nurses, we tend to care for others, which is what we were trained to do, but for me, this has been the most challenging thing- to care for me first. Selfcare is so important. ❤️
This mirrors what happened to me last Saturday but my son never regained a pulse. He had just had his 5th birthday
Richard, so sorry to read this. It’s heartbreaking. You are in my thoughts ❤
Sorry for your loss
@@alidi4144 💜
Tomorrow is 15 months since my beautiful boy, my only child drowned in the ocean. He was 17, and taken by a rip current and washed onto the beach 21 hours later. I am so broken, so lost, still so confused. And im pissed.
Ren, so sad to read this. When we lose a child, our hearts are ripped out of us. Are you getting an help in trying to deal with your grief? I started therapy 4 months ago. Hard work but it does help me process some of my issues. Not all by any means. 🙏
@@wendyshannon789 thank you. Yes, I've been in therapy (before) and more intensive recently. It's very hard, but, better living through chemicals, eh?
I'm obsessed with death, dying, drowning and how it feels to drown, and NDEs. I appreciate your video, your words gave me some comfort. Knowing I'm not alone helps. Thank you ❤️
@@renrick you are definitely not alone. It’s an indescribable journey. Please take care ❤️
I'm so sorry for your indescribable loss. I lost my youngest son July 25, 2021 to drowning. He had just turned 17. I also wonder if he suffered, and I'm so broken. I'm completely heartbroken and have no idea how to get any better. Wishing you love and any peace you may find.
@@tkinquisitive2803 my heart goes out to you on the loss of your precious son. It is very early on your grief journey and it hurts so very much. I still hurt nearly 2 years later. I would suggest grief therapy if you aren’t already doing that. As I said, I still have not accepted my daughter’s untimely death, but I have accepted this horrible journey is for life. Please take care of YOU. 🙏
What it felt to me like, after my beautiful daughter died, that trying to live in the world was as if I had moved to another country, where I didn't know anyone, and didnt understand the language.
Sooty, this is so accurate! People do not understand, don’t know what to say to bereaved parents. And this makes it very isolating for us. I hope you are doing as well as you can 💜
This is exactly how it feels to me. My son died 2 months ago.
I lost my son 7 weeks ago. Thanks for sharing your video. I need to talk to someone🙏♥️
Jemma, this is so very sad. If you search for me on Social Media, you will find me, if you want to talk 💔
I also lost my son last month Aug. 11. You are not alone in this heart shattering journey. May God bless us and parents who deals with the loss of their children.
@@jamya.3168 I am so sorry to hear this. Yes, we are a horrible, life long journey every day. My thoughts and prayers are with you 💔
I lost my son in April to cancer he was 59 years old
@@ingeritchie595 my deepest heartfelt condolences to you. Regardless of age, they are still our children and to bury your son is not proper order. 🙏💔
Me and my husband just lost our baby girl August 5th. She was 2 months old.
Kinah, I am so very sorry to hear of the loss of your baby girl. It’s a terrible shock. I am thinking and of you at this very early stage of your grief journey. Lean in on your family and take all the support you are offered. 🙏💔
My thoughts and prayers are with you ❤️
My son 33,daughter 37 and mom 74 all died last year.
So sorry to read this. My heart and love goes out to you. ❤
I lost my precious 29 year old son to a sudden cardiac arrest on 11/8/23. I couldn't even celebrate Christmas. I stayed alone in my apartment with his 2 cats (mine had both just passed away in the past 3 months.)
Some days, I get up and begin to move through the day as if nothing has happened. It's as if I am in denial. Then, I go somewhere that he and I frequented, and I breakdown knowing he will never be there with me again. 7 weeks into this and I cannot imagine EVER healing from this loss.😢
I am so very sorry for your loss, and the pain you are feeling right now is unbearable. I know that. It’s as if you are stuck in time. This is still so raw for you and unfortunately this pain is a natural thing at this stage. I hope you are getting help from a medical professional. Please do if you haven’t. I tried to go the pain alone but couldn’t. There is nothing anyone can say now that will make you feel better, but with the passage of time, the pain will ease. Now it has to be managed. Seek professional advice and lean in on your family and friends. You can’t do this alone 💜
@@wendyshannon789 well unfortunately my ONLY friend who DOES understand because she experienced it too, is about to lose her dear husband and dad at the same time, so I can't lean on her. Family does not understand and have moved way ahead. It's all on me. It has always been all on me, so I will plug along and pray I can make it. Thank you very much for your comments.
@@NoMoreTears64 you have a lot to deal with right now with your friend. A very sad situation and your own grief on top of that. You could seek professional advice if that’s an option for you? I have been through therapy and I am also in a few Facebook groups specifically for child loss. I find them really helpful 💜
@@NoMoreTears64I lost my son who was born still and I was 17 years I grieved for years and never wanted to have children ever again, I had a couple of miscarriage after that that I grieved just as much as my son. I can only imagine what you and Wendy must be going through. I am with you in spirit and will keep you always in my thoughts.❤❤❤
@@wendyshannon789 I was looking for a grief counselor but then when SS gave me my .50 a month Cola adjustment, I got kicked off of Medicaid. I will have to wait until next December when I am on Medicare. I am in a Grief Share group that I started the day after my son's memorial service. Yes, it helps SOME, but as you said, the pain never goes away.
I lost
My daughter in my 2nd trimester. She’d be here next week 💔😢 2/12/23
Ashley, this is so traumatic for you. My thoughts and prayers are with you 🙏
ANJELICA (Jelly) Skye Vivenne Miele, (11/1/93) my daughter, was killed April19, 2022, in a car accident. She died instantly, they say, 2 miles from home. Forever 28. I have no real reason or desire to be alive anymore.
Hang in there. Lost my 18+ son in horrific accident, 3 young adults died 32 years ago this month. You must, somehow, put 1 foot in front of the other, just move, take walks around your block. Something will come to you. But, u HAVE to take a first step.The intellectual part wil come later, but physically, u have to move. Something will come out of it. I will pray for your courage. Also call your Dr. Antidepressants help. I used and it kept me alive and human. I’m soooooo sorry.
I lost my 29 year old daughter 2 mos ago. Trying to do daily activities. I never got to say goodbye to her …hit and run accident. I am furious at God.
Be gentle with yourself. It is so hard to focus. That is tragic to hear. So unavoidable. I hope he is paying the price. X
Losing parents, friends, grandparents sucks .But those are NOTHING compared to losing a child , during pregnancy or in other ways doesn’t matter .It’s the worst pain someone can experience especially those of us that carried them in our bodies
Totally. It is truly life changing. 💜
wow
Thank you for watching ❤
being trans i cant have my own children, and i dont personally intend on having children. but somehow i know that if i were to have a child and lose that child, it would be the greatest pain id ever have to endure.
i cant begin to imagine such a loss, it conflicts with everything we know to be true, it feels wrong and malicious, because we know we arent supposed to outlive our children. we hope that our last moments will be with them. for the joys a child can bring to some parents, to have that joy severed in their lifetime must feel like losing something that can never be reclaimed.
Wendy, thanks for this. I lost my 5 year old to invasive strep A that led to sepsis. She was very healthy- hardly ever sick.. home within 36 hours of her first fever. Could I have taken her to A&E earlier? Maybe she would be alive and sleeping beside me now..
So very sorry to read this. Very similar situation to mine. There is nothing you could have done. Sepsis is so rapid. I worked in Critical Care myself and saw it many times. Please don’t beat yourself up about this. Your angel is always sleeping beside you 💜
Hi diptithakur! So sorry for your loss. I am in same situation as you. Lost my 11 months old son on June 1. We were planning for his first birthday on 12 th June but have to go through this. We have taken him on time for fever( viral infection) to hospital meanwhile strep A took the advantage of his condition and killed him😢. Please don’t blame yourself. This is the hardest phase we are going through. Try to live in the positive moments we spent with them. 😢😢😢😢 I know it’s easy to say but we having other family who need us too😢😢. Take care
@@wendyshannon789So sorry for your loss. I also lost my 3 year old dautgher to invasive strep A that led to sepsis. She had chicken pox(varicella) and invasive strep A at the same time and I was thinking that high fever was because of varicella. She died 12 hours after we took her at the hospital. I am so devasteted and full self blame.
@@mamathareddykotagiri thank you for sharing your story. I am sending you love and hugs for your beautiful loss. It really is so difficult to know, almost impossible, where to start processing all this, and how our beautiful children can be taken from us. We are not alone in our grief 💜
@@AntonijaBajan I so feel your pain in this message. Unfortunately, when a life threatening infection strikes the body, it is a waiting game to see if antibiotics work, and in our cases, they don’t because the infection has attacked every organ, so please know, there was nothing you could have done. I watched my daughter get taken from us in the space of 24 hours, and yes, it is devastating, but working in CCU and brain injury units throughout my career, I knew if Rachael came off life support, she would have had life changing medical issues, and she could never have dealt with that, nor could we as a family, knowing how she lived life to the full. Please don’t let guilt take over your grief. Use the space to think of your memories, painful as that is, but through time, the pain will reduce and your heart will burst with love again 💜xx
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My son was killed two days ago ………
I don’t how I missed this post. I am so very sorry for your loss. I hope you are doing as good as you can. No parent should ever have to go through this. Sending love your way ❤
Blessings and healing on your long journey.
@@gwenbrown6173 thank you for your kind words 💜
I've lost my Mark to drug over dose 😢 I can't seem to function. Only God knows our pain 😂❤
7:40 - Consequences of grief
9:40 - Severe grief reaction
10:40 - Acceptance of grief? Maybe not
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My son was a victim of my dysfunctional husband and his buddies then he blamed a cop was trying to start a race war in Daytona he is also a teacher and drug addict!
I have no words for this! This sounds like a horror movie for you!! So very sorry 💔
I struggle right now with religion, at first I was comfortable with my son passing and being in heaven, now I'm angry and frustrated with God, I can't understand why God inflicts so much suffering on us in order to bring us towards him, let alone take my son and not save him I struggle really hard with that. I don't understand why he didn't take me. It hurts, I suffer
Robert, I hear you. It really has challenged me too- and still is. It is a struggle to know why?
I get where your coming from. I have no faith since I lost my son 6yr ago I'm still so angry big hugs x
MIL , extremely religious woman , tried to lecture me about “lessons “. She has all her children living in their sixties and has a healthy life at 89. I can’t talk to her anymore.