Yep, my children are now both in their 30s (37 and 32). When the first moved out i missed her *terribly* i was super proud of her but i missed her. It wasn't empty nest syndrome as i still had my youngest with me. But i missed my daily long chats with the oldest. When my youngest moved and moved several states away. i very unexpectedly bawled my eyes out (i mean, i was proud, i was feeling like i'd done my job right - this was the goal all along was to raise two healthy happy well adjusted women - both my kids are women - and to have them fly on their own, i wasn't expecting my own tears). But i didn't give myself time to really grieve it, i immersed myself into work (Veterinary), my husband and i were both planning our retirement, getting our house ready to sell and planning to move two states away ourselves (thankfully we'd already bought the house we were moving to as it was a vacation home for over a decade before we moved). So i was packing 30 plus years of stuff right after my youngest moved out. My husband and i did manage to take a vacation in all that, the first vacation (more than a weekend) without children at all in over 25 years at the time. That was pretty cool! But it is a loss, especially for those who absolutely reveled in motherhood. Looking back over that stage of my life, i would do nothing different. I'm grateful i got to be their Mom. BUT there is a sense of finding yourself after that and you get time to do a whole lot of introspection on your own self and that's some pretty important stuff - it gets you ready for a whole different (new and exciting) era of your life. I now have two grandchildren and let me tell you, that too, is an amazing part of life! I am still very connected to my kids - i'm still incredibly proud of both of them. Now in my retirement i have hobbies and animals and other things i enjoy - being a Mom was a huge part of my identity, but it's not my whole identity and getting to explore the other areas of myself has been an important part of things. (Sorry for the Novella but this topic was definitely one that resonated even if several years ago).
Thank you for this comment!!! I totally relate to all you have written!!! This era is new and exciting but yes, when so much of your identity is being a mom it’s a hard shift!!! I too think being a grandma is amazing!!!
@@theeggtimertictic1136 I am not sure if you directed that to me or to Amanda (it shows as a reply to me but i recognize that you may have meant it as to Amanda) so i will answer it too, just in case it was to me. No, we have no intentions of moving again and our daughter loves the state she lives in so we won't be bridging that geographical gap. We have taken our oldest grandson every summer since she moved to ND (where she lives) this year the youngest will be old enough to do the same so we will take both. We will have them for about 6 weeks. And of course i can't wait for that. Grandchildren are absolutely terrific but they can't be your whole identity either. I get being really sad, maybe even depressed a bit when your children move out but you really have to look at this as a terrific chance to rediscover you and best of all what you invested (time, money, energy) in your kids can be redirected to invest in yourself, your home, your spouse, new goals and in general a new wonderful chapter of life.
This is a topic that I totally relate to. My sons are 30 and 34 and doing all the things that they are supposed to do and yet I find myself lonely. I have grandchildren and absolutely love it, but when the house is quite and it is just me and my husband, I feel like I'm lost. I lost my mother, my older sister and my whole family dynamic changed over the span of a few years..... So needless to say this is a season of life that is wrapped up in joy and sorrow. I'm active and my husband and I have a wonderful relationship, but it's still those quite moments that I long for my children home and my mom and sister a phone call away. Yes, this is definitely a hard season but I know beautiful moments are still ahead and the future is full of promise. This is a good topic to discuss..... I wasn't prepared for all these feelings.
Wow…. I just lost my dad this past September ( another topic I wasn’t to do a video on) and that in and of itself leaves a void for sure. Losing your sister on top of that would be devastating hon!!! Sending you a huge hug!!! That would be an extra hard time to come home to a quiet house for sure!! Loss and dealing with loss really doesn’t become such a part of life as we get older and no one talks about it! Thanks for sharing!
My kids are 5, 4, 2, and twin 1 year olds, but I'm already thinking of how hard it wi be when they move out! Children are so important to us, in fact my kids are a BIG reason I decided to stop dying my hair, and let my silver show! ❤
I know my child is only 6 but I already think about the time she will want to move out. I think it’s such an important topic to talk. My mom went through a really rough time when my sister and I moved out.
Great topic ! My older son is looking to get an apartment soon and I know I’ll miss him a lot , my younger son will likely be home another couple of years but it’ll be hard when he moves out as well . I’ll probably pick up more volunteer work after they go to keep myself busy as my husband will be working another 5 years . By the way , I saw the Barbie movie with my sister and loved it !
This is such a great video, Amanda. I was dreading the day my son would move out. He was an only child so I'm super attached-we tried but could never have another. Well...we got finally got pregnant and I had the baby 3 months before my son's senior graduation! My boys are 17 years apart. My oldest moved away to go to college but I was so busy with the baby so I have never had the time to think about it and be sad that Duglas had moved away. By the time my youngest(8 years old now) grows up and moves out, I'll be too old to be sad. BTW, My oldest also has high functioning Autism! He convinced me to go see the Barbie movie with him (I thought it was one of those kiddie type movies) but it was so, so good! You are going to love it!
I had a really hard time when my twins moved out. I feel like my parents didn’t go through this when I moved out (I’m an only child). Maybe it’s harder for parents nowadays because we are so much more focused on our kids than our parent were? I’m not sure this is actually true, but it kind of seems like it is. Now I’m going through the issue of aging parents with health problems. Maybe you would like to do a video on that? It’s another really hard time in life. I think when our kids are young, we feel like our real lives are just starting, and it’s a very exciting and happy time (not always, but often). Then as time goes on, and the realities of problems set in (our kids aren’t perfect or have some issues that are difficult), the kids move away, and then the parents grow older and eventually die, life isn’t as exciting or happy. It’s a rough transition. Hair is a nice break from that actually.
Yes I feel my 'real' life started when I had my small children. Now the excitement is ebbing as they leave. I find this season of my life is hard. Hope you're doing well.
Thank you fir this video. Im here bawling my eyes out. Im 53 and probably nearing menopsuse. My middle daughter is 23 and will be getting married and moving out soon 3 hours drive away. I am so sad. I was s stay at home mother. have 3 girls and when they go I feel my house will be full of ghosts (not literally). They are musical and loud and I will miss that so much. I have regrets about the sort of mother I was and would love to do it all again properly ... I was a bit of a hoarder and the house was often messy. I come from a farming family originally and all the children stayed nearby through generations. I was very close to my granny and had a wonderful close relationship with her. I have a very vivid imagination and had visualised life with grandchildren nearby. Now that I realise that may not happen I can see no purpose in life. All I ever wanted to be was a mother. I was glad I lived near my mother when my children were small and I feel my daughter wont realise this until its too late. I love helping them and doing things for them. Hopefully I can work through this grief but at the moment life seems meaningless. Sorry for rant.
I hear ya, it does get really quiet and that's unnerving at first and life isn't the chaotic good that it was when you were raising them. (and it's funny when the kids come here to visit and stay for a day we instantly revert back to that chaotic good). But i guarantee you you will find purpose after. 3 hour drive isn't too bad, my oldest daughter (and her fiance) lives in the same state we do - but also 3 hours away. While during the winter we do not see them at all... all other months we manage a once a month(ish) visit and it's all good. Then in October they come and spend two weeks with us and it's just an absolute blast. We fill the time up well in between all that too, concerts, get-aways, visits with friends etc. I know it's hard, it's a huge life change but it's just a new equally as satisfying way of living. You'll get there.
I too have three daughters and a son actually and I think we all have those mom regrets and wish we could do certain things over... I am now in the grandma stage of life so trust me, with 3 daughters you have that to look forward to and its amazing!! This is a new time for you, and its important you start figuring out something that you like to do! I would say its normal to be feeling the empty nest feeling my dear! it really is exciting to watch your kids start to launch but so bitter sweet too! Thinking of you!
It’s a bit strange now… cause i heard that Grey hair is more fragile, coarser and dryer… it’s amazing I’am just slowly getting greyer day by day or month by month… i don’t know how i Will look like hair keep falling etc… i saw some little cell Turn over on that particular strand on that pigmented i was rush about it i mean u cutt the upper part and leaved it all Grey the root, it’s not first time i did it many times lol… :( 😮
Yep, my children are now both in their 30s (37 and 32). When the first moved out i missed her *terribly* i was super proud of her but i missed her. It wasn't empty nest syndrome as i still had my youngest with me. But i missed my daily long chats with the oldest. When my youngest moved and moved several states away. i very unexpectedly bawled my eyes out (i mean, i was proud, i was feeling like i'd done my job right - this was the goal all along was to raise two healthy happy well adjusted women - both my kids are women - and to have them fly on their own, i wasn't expecting my own tears). But i didn't give myself time to really grieve it, i immersed myself into work (Veterinary), my husband and i were both planning our retirement, getting our house ready to sell and planning to move two states away ourselves (thankfully we'd already bought the house we were moving to as it was a vacation home for over a decade before we moved). So i was packing 30 plus years of stuff right after my youngest moved out. My husband and i did manage to take a vacation in all that, the first vacation (more than a weekend) without children at all in over 25 years at the time. That was pretty cool! But it is a loss, especially for those who absolutely reveled in motherhood. Looking back over that stage of my life, i would do nothing different. I'm grateful i got to be their Mom. BUT there is a sense of finding yourself after that and you get time to do a whole lot of introspection on your own self and that's some pretty important stuff - it gets you ready for a whole different (new and exciting) era of your life. I now have two grandchildren and let me tell you, that too, is an amazing part of life! I am still very connected to my kids - i'm still incredibly proud of both of them. Now in my retirement i have hobbies and animals and other things i enjoy - being a Mom was a huge part of my identity, but it's not my whole identity and getting to explore the other areas of myself has been an important part of things. (Sorry for the Novella but this topic was definitely one that resonated even if several years ago).
Thank you for this comment!!! I totally relate to all you have written!!! This era is new and exciting but yes, when so much of your identity is being a mom it’s a hard shift!!! I too think being a grandma is amazing!!!
How are you now 6 months later. Are you near your grandchildren? I'm in the depths of despair because my daughter is moving out soon.
@@theeggtimertictic1136 I am not sure if you directed that to me or to Amanda (it shows as a reply to me but i recognize that you may have meant it as to Amanda) so i will answer it too, just in case it was to me.
No, we have no intentions of moving again and our daughter loves the state she lives in so we won't be bridging that geographical gap. We have taken our oldest grandson every summer since she moved to ND (where she lives) this year the youngest will be old enough to do the same so we will take both. We will have them for about 6 weeks. And of course i can't wait for that. Grandchildren are absolutely terrific but they can't be your whole identity either. I get being really sad, maybe even depressed a bit when your children move out but you really have to look at this as a terrific chance to rediscover you and best of all what you invested (time, money, energy) in your kids can be redirected to invest in yourself, your home, your spouse, new goals and in general a new wonderful chapter of life.
This is a topic that I totally relate to. My sons are 30 and 34 and doing all the things that they are supposed to do and yet I find myself lonely. I have grandchildren and absolutely love it, but when the house is quite and it is just me and my husband, I feel like I'm lost. I lost my mother, my older sister and my whole family dynamic changed over the span of a few years..... So needless to say this is a season of life that is wrapped up in joy and sorrow. I'm active and my husband and I have a wonderful relationship, but it's still those quite moments that I long for my children home and my mom and sister a phone call away. Yes, this is definitely a hard season but I know beautiful moments are still ahead and the future is full of promise. This is a good topic to discuss..... I wasn't prepared for all these feelings.
Wow…. I just lost my dad this past September ( another topic I wasn’t to do a video on) and that in and of itself leaves a void for sure. Losing your sister on top of that would be devastating hon!!! Sending you a huge hug!!!
That would be an extra hard time to come home to a quiet house for sure!! Loss and dealing with loss really doesn’t become such a part of life as we get older and no one talks about it! Thanks for sharing!
My kids are 5, 4, 2, and twin 1 year olds, but I'm already thinking of how hard it wi be when they move out! Children are so important to us, in fact my kids are a BIG reason I decided to stop dying my hair, and let my silver show! ❤
It is a hard stage for so many parents!!!
I know my child is only 6 but I already think about the time she will want to move out. I think it’s such an important topic to talk. My mom went through a really rough time when my sister and I moved out.
I think so many women struggle with it!! It really is a tough time!!!
Great topic ! My older son is looking to get an apartment soon and I know I’ll miss him a lot , my younger son will likely be home another couple of years but it’ll be hard when he moves out as well . I’ll probably pick up more volunteer work after they go to keep myself busy as my husband will be working another 5 years . By the way , I saw the Barbie movie with my sister and loved it !
It really is a stage full of so many emotion and also of reinventing for the moms!
This is such a great video, Amanda. I was dreading the day my son would move out. He was an only child so I'm super attached-we tried but could never have another. Well...we got finally got pregnant and I had the baby 3 months before my son's senior graduation! My boys are 17 years apart. My oldest moved away to go to college but I was so busy with the baby so I have never had the time to think about it and be sad that Duglas had moved away. By the time my youngest(8 years old now) grows up and moves out, I'll be too old to be sad. BTW, My oldest also has high functioning Autism! He convinced me to go see the Barbie movie with him (I thought it was one of those kiddie type movies) but it was so, so good! You are going to love it!
one day I would love to connect more about our boys...
@@amandasilversister Yes! I would love to, too!
I had a really hard time when my twins moved out. I feel like my parents didn’t go through this when I moved out (I’m an only child). Maybe it’s harder for parents nowadays because we are so much more focused on our kids than our parent were? I’m not sure this is actually true, but it kind of seems like it is.
Now I’m going through the issue of aging parents with health problems. Maybe you would like to do a video on that? It’s another really hard time in life. I think when our kids are young, we feel like our real lives are just starting, and it’s a very exciting and happy time (not always, but often). Then as time goes on, and the realities of problems set in (our kids aren’t perfect or have some issues that are difficult), the kids move away, and then the parents grow older and eventually die, life isn’t as exciting or happy. It’s a rough transition.
Hair is a nice break from that actually.
I would love to speak about all of that!!! I lost my dad a year ago… and you are right , kids can bring a whole other dynamic…
@@amandasilversister , I’m so sorry about your dad. It’s very hard.
Yes I feel my 'real' life started when I had my small children. Now the excitement is ebbing as they leave. I find this season of my life is hard. Hope you're doing well.
Thank you fir this video. Im here bawling my eyes out. Im 53 and probably nearing menopsuse. My middle daughter is 23 and will be getting married and moving out soon 3 hours drive away. I am so sad. I was s stay at home mother. have 3 girls and when they go I feel my house will be full of ghosts (not literally). They are musical and loud and I will miss that so much. I have regrets about the sort of mother I was and would love to do it all again properly ... I was a bit of a hoarder and the house was often messy. I come from a farming family originally and all the children stayed nearby through generations. I was very close to my granny and had a wonderful close relationship with her. I have a very vivid imagination and had visualised life with grandchildren nearby. Now that I realise that may not happen I can see no purpose in life. All I ever wanted to be was a mother. I was glad I lived near my mother when my children were small and I feel my daughter wont realise this until its too late. I love helping them and doing things for them. Hopefully I can work through this grief but at the moment life seems meaningless. Sorry for rant.
I hear ya, it does get really quiet and that's unnerving at first and life isn't the chaotic good that it was when you were raising them. (and it's funny when the kids come here to visit and stay for a day we instantly revert back to that chaotic good). But i guarantee you you will find purpose after. 3 hour drive isn't too bad, my oldest daughter (and her fiance) lives in the same state we do - but also 3 hours away. While during the winter we do not see them at all... all other months we manage a once a month(ish) visit and it's all good. Then in October they come and spend two weeks with us and it's just an absolute blast. We fill the time up well in between all that too, concerts, get-aways, visits with friends etc. I know it's hard, it's a huge life change but it's just a new equally as satisfying way of living. You'll get there.
@@candyh3693 Thank you so much for the long reply ... It's comforting.
@@theeggtimertictic1136 You're welcome, i am glad it is comforting to you! Wish you the best!
I too have three daughters and a son actually and I think we all have those mom regrets and wish we could do certain things over... I am now in the grandma stage of life so trust me, with 3 daughters you have that to look forward to and its amazing!! This is a new time for you, and its important you start figuring out something that you like to do! I would say its normal to be feeling the empty nest feeling my dear! it really is exciting to watch your kids start to launch but so bitter sweet too! Thinking of you!
@@amandasilversister Thank you for your thoughtful reply 🙏
This is such an important topic!
Definitely one we should normalize more for one another too!
You look amazing mama! My youngest moved out for 4 years and is now back to finish his Masters. So now I have a full house again. 😁
Well that can be bitter sweet!! Lol
Thanks for sharing ur experience ❤
Anytime!!! Thank for watching hon!!
It’s a bit strange now… cause i heard that Grey hair is more fragile, coarser and dryer… it’s amazing I’am just slowly getting greyer day by day or month by month… i don’t know how i Will look like hair keep falling etc… i saw some little cell Turn over on that particular strand on that pigmented i was rush about it i mean u cutt the upper part and leaved it all Grey the root, it’s not first time i did it many times lol…
:( 😮
I am sure it will look great!
Hey beautiful!
Hope you are enjoying my videos!