Hey Guys, hope you enjoyed learning how to be a good father to a son. If are ready to become the best version of yourself as a father and want to go from confused to confident, you would love my Parenting Program. Book a call with us to learn more: www.daduniversity.com/application/?=ytc138
Some of us are blocked. We're not allowed to be a father to the child. Because the court system and the mother do not let you. The coach system only wants your money and they don't care about the child. The mother raises that child to just be loyal to her and not give a D*** about the father. Society has excluded the father out of the family.😢😢😢😢
My son just started 7th grade. Me and my wife have disrespected each other so much in front and away from our kids (daughter is 14) as we have been on the brink of divorce for a few years. Its a wonder how our children are so wonderful. We quit drinking and smoking cigarettes recently. Never felt better. We cried w our children as we quit. Love has always been there. Hopefully the alcohol monster stays away and it will. All I ever want to do is be a good father and husband to my family I love so much. Thank you GOD.
I hope your marriage recovers. Remember that love is partly a choice and if you want to make it work, you can. I'm glad you're trying to turn things around. Bless
My wife and I quit alcohol 1 year before our son was born. The drink is probably the worst thing for a family. Patience and presence is out the window and impossible after your end of the day drinks.
Dad of five young men. Thought I would share some additional thoughts: - CHOOSE to be interested in the things he is interested in. - Encourage him in the things he cares about. Don't force your desires onto him. - Correct him firmly when heart issues that will affect his future are exposed through bad behavior. Dig deep for the root issue of bad behavior through lots of questions. - Apologize when you screw up and ask his forgiveness.
Your last two points - nailed it. I make it a point to own my mistakes, they seem not to care either way, but that’s not the point - I want them to SEE humility
@@BeowolfNindoJournaljus bad behavior in general, say he bullies or picks on another person, or say he steals something, or doesnt speak up when his peers are doing bad..
00:00 intro 01:23 be present 02:19 give affection 03:33 let him do things for himself (don't do too much) 05:08 be nice to his mom 06:25 emotions are okay 07:42 manners matter 08:47 unconditional love "love the son you have, not the son you want", registered in my best-quotes list!!
My dad once told me, remember the way I’ve handled things as a father remember the bad and the good. Take the good apply as your own don’t repeat the bad. Be the father you wish you had. Teach you sons this so they can teach there’s so every generation we become better and better fathers. My dads father was never around, he had at least 2-3 other families I’m proud of the man my father has become and proud to call him Dad
Coming from a father that showed ZERO affection... Has never to this day said, "I love you" after 41 years of my life... I am a HUGE fan of public affection towards my son! I love my son with every ounce of my life! He is the best thing that has ever happened to me! :-) I will love him till the day I die... and for all of time!
I think also reading to him, watching sports together, wresting with him, taking him when you go out is also a good thing. Basically involving him in what you do is excellent. This was the biggest contribution my own father did for me and I am eternally grateful for that.
I became a father at a real young age, 17 to be exact, and being a guy that grow without a mother nor father; I really had no idea an how to Dad. But thanks to this type of videos I’m shaping myself to be not the perfect Dad out there but the one that my son really needs and the one that he never feel embarrassed of. Thanks for your advices 🙏
Sounds as if you have a real chance to become a great father. Having been there more than once, I feel very strongly in one thing. Get down on the floor with your son. That is his world. Be on his level. This will always allow you to see eye to eye. Go through all the fun and not so fun times,,,together. And then one day when you are no longer pay attention you will see him shaving. Have fun it's a great ride
1 Be present 2 give affection 3 let him do things for himself (don't do too much) 4 be nice to his mom 5 Emotions are okay 6 Manners matter 7 unconditional love
My son pick up all my Athletic genes and I think he seems to be more Athletic than me My oldest son seems to be more of ladies man both of my son's are pretty boys I had them boxing and my youngest son has amazing boxing skills God blessed me with 2 sons they are the best thing that has ever happened to me
I became a father along time ago. There is a ton of advice I can give, but I don't want to highjack a video. For now I will leave you with this. When I needed inspiration, I listen to the song"The Younger Generation " by John Sebastian. Don't be surprised if after all you have done, he just one day leaves. He will do that. And you sit and wonder when he will ask you how to be a Dad. And he don't, you wait, but he never ask. You watch him with his kids and he's good. His kids love him, and are a credit. And then it hits you. You don't have to tell him how to be a Dad. He watched you do it
This is the first video I've seen on how I feel to correctly raise my son. My dad died on March 4th, and I find myself constantly looking up videos for my son. He is about to be one and I want to raise him in the best way possible. Thank you for making me not feel crazy for giving my son unconditional love and support while teaching him. It seems every other video is about masculinity, and no emotions. I'm happy to see a video that shows actual development and care.
Thanks for sharing. My father left us when we were young, It really impacted me and it felt like i was missing something. So I always promised myself that if I was to become a dad I would value fatherhood over making career, over money and over everything. And as a result, i do check all the boxes mentioned here. That feels great. It also helps I love nothing more than being with my 3 boys. I rather go watch a movie with them than go to a bar with my friends. I rather sit with them and do their homework than going out to enjoy myself. They are my world and I hope I will give them a great solid foundation for them to build on. Thanks again for sharing.👏
Not the same but when my dad remarried when i was 7 or 8 he started a small business and that consumed him. I saw my step family more than him when i went over there. The reason ive stayed with current employer is because of the flexibility that it offers, not because of pay even though i struggle at times. And i feel the same way about spending time with him. I take my son places all the time. I definitely do things with friends and their kids but id rather it be just us. I have a buddy who gets butt hurt when i do things solo with my son and dont invite his family. Seems hed rather be with the friends than spend time as a family
Honestly I didnt kno what to expect from this video... I'm 31 & a father to a 5 year old. Idk y bit I've been feeling a bit under the weather with my parenting skills but honestly after watchin this video really put me @ ease & really opened my eyes.... I'm definitely a subscriber!!. Thanks again man!!!. Much appreciated!
My wife and I have been together from a young age. I have went above and beyond to provide and make sure she has everything she wants. I have spoiled her, and now that we had a baby, I felt like I was an adult and she was still an immature child. This has brought issues into our relationship ship, how did we solve them? I decided to be an adult for just a little longer, and started reading a book with her every night before bed. Crucial Conversations by Joseph Granny. Not only did it help her see how amazing her life is, but it made me realize how many mistakes I was still making. Today were expecting baby #2 and we're stronger than ever. Don't shy away from books dad's, you'll surprise yourselves.
These are great reminders. I have 4 sons and 1 daughter. All the points were spot on, but I particularly like the ones about being present and showing affection. The most difficult part about being a father is we find our own weaknesses. Repentance and forgiveness are a necessary component for relationships.
I think that challenging a son both physically, and mentally helps boys to gain confidence in their body and mind. Give him clear and easy to follow tasks, to build that sense of self accomplishments goes a long way. For example, I lined up the morning schedule to my 5yo son, once he accomplished it successfully once, and got praised for it, he just did it on his own from that moment on. Same goes for showering by himself , doing a few easy to accomplish house works etc. He even asks to take on more and more responsibilities to show us and himself , that he is a "big and strong boy", that can contribute just as much as his siblings.
Thanks for your channel, bud. I never had a good dad and, he died when I was 12; never guiding me and teaching me how to be a man. I had to learn myself. Now that I'm a father of a 13 year old at almost 40 years old, I appreciate the work you put into these vids. Much love.
This video is great! It’s common sense but for most guys it’s a hard subject to grasp. I got a girl pregnant last year, I promised I stay and support her all the way through, some stuff happened along the way and she pretty much told me to hit the road. This February my first son was born and I love him so much, everyone says he’s so cute, my phone’s camera roll is filled with his pictures. I’m still insecure about being a good dad since I don’t get to see him regularly. I pay the child support and buy stuff like diapers and wipes in bulk. She’s a great mom and he loves his mom, I want my mixed feelings for her to go away for the good of my son.
I'm sorry you are going through that situation. We as men always have a different perspective on how we'd like to start a family, but unfortunately in most cases that is turned upside down by sneaky behaviours from women. Baby trap is just one example. . Good luck with being a great dad .
Whatever you do, be there as much as you possibly can and never disrespect her in front of him. You’ll be just fine. Cherish the time you do get with him. When he’s older he’ll ask to be with you more and more and you’ll have a great relationship. Think about coaching or helping coach his sports teams. That will get you a ton of time with him just helping him and his teammates become better humans. I just got done with assistant/safety coaching my first football season with no experience whatsoever (playing or coaching) and we are now closer than ever. 3rd/4th graders. Highly recommend trying it yourself! You can do it!
There's this present pain in my heart seeing my son being deprive to have a father like you describe. His dad is still alive but he has a limited knowledge on how to be a father and maybe his childhood has something to do about that but I can't still fully accept that reason. I believe that having a very good role model father while growing up is necessary to build a right foundation to follow but a fatherless children can still be a good parent because of his love and care for his child.
I was raised by a single mom.and to this day there's so many personality flaws I had to work thru...my mom loved.the hell out of me and did a great job but it's just not the same...I never had anyone to teach me how to "be a man", how to deal with women, emotions, nobody taught me how to fix things, no "wise" man in my life with all the answers a boy or teen needs....if you have a son you have no idea how much being there will make in his life...I have a son now, I have no role model whatsoever to base our relationship on, but I'm gonna be around and I figure that's all I can do and try my best...I just wish I had someone to tech me what iw was supposed to do
OUTSTANDING VIDEO - Thank you! My wife and I are so proud of our two boys, they are critical thinking, loving and compassionate people who are still connected to our Family. Your 7 habits for Fathers are SPOT ON, thank you!!!!
This was very reassuring for me. My partner of 5 years has two teen boys from her previous marriage (pre-teen when we met) and the take away message in this video is "just keep doing what's coming naturally" 😊
My son has taught me many lessons. Whenever I do something out of character he ask me if my father treated me like that. It reminds me that I do not want to repeat how I was treated as a child and helps me fix my behavior. If I snap at him and call him a name or degrade him like my father did I always apologize. I’m not perfect, but I know generational patterns can only be changed by me.
I become a dad at 17, and im so scary because i dont have any support from my parents, but im so happy that i watched this video cause it helped so much thank u
I had terrible parenting, especially from my dad, and decided to opt out of having kids entirely. It might have been different if I had had this sort of mentoring in time to do something with it
What a wonderful video - thank you. I am a new father - I didn’t have a great role model, so I’m searching for content like this. The only hug my dad ever gave me was when I got into law school. I kiss and hug my little boy multiple times a day. It’s a wonderful feeling, sad that my dad missed out on that.
💯 your son is watching you and learning. Yesterday we were trick or treating, and I was picking up candy wrappers that were littered on the sidewalk. After about 5 wrappers I picked up, my 2 yo began racing me to the wrappers to pick them up first! Lead by example. Many of us could have used better examples; don’t do those negative things that will still come to mind about your father.
Thank you so much for your advice. You have a new subscriber. I have a two year old, and I want to be the best dad for him. My dad is old school and he used to come home and read newspapers and books all the time, and work. He provided us with food and house and basic necessities, but never gave us attention, or encouraged me to do anything. And I want to be the opposite of what he didn’t provide us with as far as connection, and emotional support growing up. I learned so much by watching others. But I will be best for my kids.
This is a great video for parenting.. I will add something in here: find a family/friends that have the same mindset and and learn from them. Sons,daughters. When they were just born. They all same as a computer hard drive, is empty, what ever you teach, show and your actions, that is what they will lean and pick up kids are very smart even at early age. Thank you for making this video..
Excellent framework. I would add things like the following: - Hardwork and enjoying the process and being proud of the out come. - Be generous - Seek for truth and defend it - Understand what real physical, emotional and moral strength is and how and when to use it - Do things for the right reasons and not for recognition. - Understand that life is what you make it and that no one owes you anything. - Stoicism - Bring value to the people closest to you and the world - Forge genuine relationships - Be a peace maker whenever possible.
I have a 5yo girl and a 3yo son. Ive always wanted a daughter so i wonder if i would love my son as much as my daughter. But when he was born and i met him the first time, i was blown away by how lovely he is. And yes i provide a lot of physical affection. I wrestle and bite him a lot 😂.
I was hit by my dad as a kid alot lol, but I thank him everyday for hitting me because that set me straight. I just want to be a different type of dad and not the way my father was.
I grew up with a father who basically hid behind an engineering job & left the woman to raise the kids. He also never missed an opportunity to express his disdain for the fact I wanted nothing to do with following the same path he had followed. Oh yeah - I was their adopted son on top of all that. My childhood was sad, cold, empty, and as an adult I’m still struggling to repair the damage. It sucks. Bad.
Outstanding video. Let your sons see your strength as a man emotionally and physically. Show them what a man is. Let them see your struggles only to become triumphant over them. Let them see you work and but never quit. In leading by example you can mold them into the Men this world needs.
I agree but there is an actual dilemma when you co-parent behaves in a way that you can’t allow your kids to - drunkenness, laziness, lack of foresight, dishonesty. That’s when it gets hard. Probably default to teaching open respect but private real talk as they age
Thank you so much for your lesson. I have been forgetting so many of what you said and almost became a horrible dad to my son. Even this morning again sigh........ Thanks again for your warning and I will keep all these in my mind and try to be back to the nicest dad I used to be.
Wifey hits 38 weeks next week, little bugger is gonna pop out any day now , one thing I learnt from my father was communication - not something I had a great deal of with my dad may he RIP - I will make sure to keep the communication channel always open. I want him to be able to talk to me about anything sports, girls, cars, school life ANY and EVERYTHING. However, I would want to set boundaries - can you explain how to keep a good balance between a friend and a parent ?
While I understand the concept of being a "friend" you really are a parent that has great communication with your child. It's not really being a friend. It isn't an either/or so there isn't a balance. You create a bond of trust and communication so they do feel safe telling you anything.
one piece of constructive criticism on this video: when you spoke about loving unconditional, not loving a kid for their accomplishments. I think it really helps when we encourage our kids and praise them for their effort, not just for no reason.
Hello, Dad University. I have stumbled upon this great video of yours while browsing on RUclips. As a father of two boys, I think every man should watch your videos. Thanks for your positive advice!
Being nice to his mother is huge. My Dad talked shit about Mom and complained about her and having to pay child support/alimony... That'll make your kid's self-worth non-existent... Now I'm 31 and thinking I'll just not ever have kids. It makes me sad but I'm afraid I'll become him somehow.
Thank you so much for this kind of content. I grew up without a Dad and for me it's so important to know and do what I should in order my son grow happy...
Keep in mind, in regard to speaking positively about his Mom, that you CAN acknowledge her behavior if it's inappropriate or negative, but acknowledge the behavior and make sure you don't insult her character.
Ephesians 6:1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Ephesians 6:2 Honour thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise;) Ephesians 6:3 That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth. Ephesians 6:4 And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. Ephesians 6:5 Servants, be obedient to them that are your masters according to the flesh, with fear and trembling, in singleness of your heart, as unto Christ;
Thank you for your videos! I do a lot of the things talked about in your videos but I still have so much to learn. My son just turned 3 and he is just transforming before my eyes. Sometimes I question if I'm doing enough to stimulate him in positive ways. It's nice to have these videos to provide a bit more instruction to things I am doing in daily life.
I'm 16 this year, don't have a son or anything yet and I'm certainly not planning to have one anytime soon. However, not having a dad or a father figure present in my life for the vast majority of my life has made me worried I would not be a good father to my future child. I really want to set a good example to my future child and that's what drove me to watch videos such as this to learn and take notes from. I honestly feel as though I do not lack maturity in terms of parenting in the future, however I am worried that my mental health issues and how I would portray myself acting towards others would be viewed by my child as I'm extremely socially anxious and awkward. Even the interactions with my family members may not come off as so "friendly" as I'm very reserved so I'm afraid that that might not set a good example for my future child. I feel the need to become the best possible version of myself to portray myself to my future child and as I said with my various mental health issues may not be so easy. This video was really helpful and I found the part of "letting my child do things by themselves" very important and informative. I hope I'll be a great parental figure in the future :).
You know, I’ve raised my son, and I would see these and think, “Good God! Who can’t be a good father?!?” And here you are actually doing something productive and helpful. Good job, Sir.
As per honest experience: I want to have a special bond with my son/daughter from baby stage till death. I want them to share their doubts, I want them to be open with me, I want to encourage them even if they fail unlike my dad who belittles me every time he gets an opportunity. Unlike my father who would come home drunk, destroy stuffs and bash me, my mom and my sister and frighten us too when we were kids. This action has made me distance from him early on and made me closer with mom. Dads being toxic to their kids from a young age really takes a toll later on in the future. I don't see my dad as a role model while he should've been my role model or where I get inspiration from. I want to be what my father has failed to do for me, my sister and my mom. I don't hate my father nor do I love him.
Hey Guys, hope you enjoyed learning how to be a good father to a son. If are ready to become the best version of yourself as a father and want to go from confused to confident, you would love my Parenting Program. Book a call with us to learn more: www.daduniversity.com/application/?=ytc138
Dude don't do it, you will have no rights to a step child no rights.
Basically your just a wallet...
Dude don’t date low value women! A good woman would never prevent a father from contact with his son!
You should put together a Step By Step Guide on how to be a Better Father. I would buy your Online Course✅
Where is Mother's University Channel? 🫵😊 Thank you for sharing information on parenting!
Some of us are blocked. We're not allowed to be a father to the child. Because the court system and the mother do not let you. The coach system only wants your money and they don't care about the child. The mother raises that child to just be loyal to her and not give a D*** about the father.
Society has excluded the father out of the family.😢😢😢😢
I was fatherless
I don’t have a road map and my son is six months but your videos give me confidence everything will be okay
thank you for sharing. Glad you are here.
It will be ok. A six month old son. What a blessing.
Just keep on “keeping on,” my guy.
Your little man will love you for it.
Raise another good man.
My son just started 7th grade. Me and my wife have disrespected each other so much in front and away from our kids (daughter is 14) as we have been on the brink of divorce for a few years. Its a wonder how our children are so wonderful. We quit drinking and smoking cigarettes recently. Never felt better. We cried w our children as we quit. Love has always been there. Hopefully the alcohol monster stays away and it will. All I ever want to do is be a good father and husband to my family I love so much. Thank you GOD.
I hope your marriage recovers. Remember that love is partly a choice and if you want to make it work, you can. I'm glad you're trying to turn things around. Bless
How’s it been going?
My wife and I quit alcohol 1 year before our son was born. The drink is probably the worst thing for a family. Patience and presence is out the window and impossible after your end of the day drinks.
A real man leads his family into Christianity and a relationship with God.
You won't see the effects until they start their own relationships.
Dad of five young men. Thought I would share some additional thoughts:
- CHOOSE to be interested in the things he is interested in.
- Encourage him in the things he cares about. Don't force your desires onto him.
- Correct him firmly when heart issues that will affect his future are exposed through bad behavior. Dig deep for the root issue of bad behavior through lots of questions.
- Apologize when you screw up and ask his forgiveness.
Your last two points - nailed it. I make it a point to own my mistakes, they seem not to care either way, but that’s not the point - I want them to SEE humility
Can you please explain what you mean by heart issues? Like his goals and dreams being affected with bad behaviour?
@@BeowolfNindoJournaljus bad behavior in general, say he bullies or picks on another person, or say he steals something, or doesnt speak up when his peers are doing bad..
Thank you for this sir @coltoncarthe19687
@@phabeondominguez5971how would one handle too much time on the phone or video games even visiting moms house every weekend?
00:00 intro
01:23 be present
02:19 give affection
03:33 let him do things for himself (don't do too much)
05:08 be nice to his mom
06:25 emotions are okay
07:42 manners matter
08:47 unconditional love
"love the son you have, not the son you want", registered in my best-quotes list!!
My dad once told me, remember the way I’ve handled things as a father remember the bad and the good. Take the good apply as your own don’t repeat the bad. Be the father you wish you had. Teach you sons this so they can teach there’s so every generation we become better and better fathers. My dads father was never around, he had at least 2-3 other families
I’m proud of the man my father has become and proud to call him Dad
Coming from a father that showed ZERO affection... Has never to this day said, "I love you" after 41 years of my life... I am a HUGE fan of public affection towards my son! I love my son with every ounce of my life! He is the best thing that has ever happened to me! :-) I will love him till the day I die... and for all of time!
I think also reading to him, watching sports together, wresting with him, taking him when you go out is also a good thing. Basically involving him in what you do is excellent. This was the biggest contribution my own father did for me and I am eternally grateful for that.
I became a father at a real young age, 17 to be exact, and being a guy that grow without a mother nor father; I really had no idea an how to Dad. But thanks to this type of videos I’m shaping myself to be not the perfect Dad out there but the one that my son really needs and the one that he never feel embarrassed of. Thanks for your advices 🙏
So awesome that you are learning and growing!
Good luck bro. You can do it! Be that dad you didn’t have
I’m in the same boat as you had my boy at 17 im 21 now it’s been so crazy but thank god I read book and watched videos like these
Sounds as if you have a real chance to become a great father. Having been there more than once, I feel very strongly in one thing. Get down on the floor with your son. That is his world. Be on his level. This will always allow you to see eye to eye. Go through all the fun and not so fun times,,,together. And then one day when you are no longer pay attention you will see him shaving. Have fun it's a great ride
1 Be present
2 give affection
3 let him do things for himself (don't do too much)
4 be nice to his mom
5 Emotions are okay
6 Manners matter
7 unconditional love
Good
I do all that and still fear I’ll come up short
@seanknox5785 it's natural to have imposter syndrome/inadequacy issues.
I would add that teaching your Son about who God is and knowing that Jesus is the Lord. It’s basically the most vital thing any father can do.
My son pick up all my Athletic genes and I think he seems to be more Athletic than me My oldest son seems to be more of ladies man both of my son's are pretty boys I had them boxing and my youngest son has amazing boxing skills God blessed me with 2 sons they are the best thing that has ever happened to me
What’s the point? Respectfully.
Just a proud father
My son is currently 13 weeks old and I can’t wait to have my little man by my side ! I CANNOT WAIT! ARGHHHHHHH 👊🏽👊🏽
My wife and I have 3 boys. 5, 4 and 17 months... I'm really struggling right now with my parenting. These videos are good building blocks.
Look up "self-compassion". This is something we all need to practice more of.
You got this, dude!
Hang in there, sir. It's impossible at times, but then it eases up you realize how good you have it. We are blessed.
I became a father along time ago. There is a ton of advice I can give, but I don't want to highjack a video. For now I will leave you with this. When I needed inspiration, I listen to the song"The Younger Generation " by John Sebastian. Don't be surprised if after all you have done, he just one day leaves. He will do that. And you sit and wonder when he will ask you how to be a Dad. And he don't, you wait, but he never ask. You watch him with his kids and he's good. His kids love him, and are a credit. And then it hits you. You don't have to tell him how to be a Dad. He watched you do it
This is the first video I've seen on how I feel to correctly raise my son. My dad died on March 4th, and I find myself constantly looking up videos for my son. He is about to be one and I want to raise him in the best way possible. Thank you for making me not feel crazy for giving my son unconditional love and support while teaching him. It seems every other video is about masculinity, and no emotions. I'm happy to see a video that shows actual development and care.
Thanks for sharing. My father left us when we were young, It really impacted me and it felt like i was missing something. So I always promised myself that if I was to become a dad I would value fatherhood over making career, over money and over everything. And as a result, i do check all the boxes mentioned here. That feels great. It also helps I love nothing more than being with my 3 boys. I rather go watch a movie with them than go to a bar with my friends. I rather sit with them and do their homework than going out to enjoy myself. They are my world and I hope I will give them a great solid foundation for them to build on. Thanks again for sharing.👏
Not the same but when my dad remarried when i was 7 or 8 he started a small business and that consumed him. I saw my step family more than him when i went over there. The reason ive stayed with current employer is because of the flexibility that it offers, not because of pay even though i struggle at times. And i feel the same way about spending time with him. I take my son places all the time. I definitely do things with friends and their kids but id rather it be just us. I have a buddy who gets butt hurt when i do things solo with my son and dont invite his family. Seems hed rather be with the friends than spend time as a family
#1 Be a good man.
That's it. That's the list.
Honestly I didnt kno what to expect from this video... I'm 31 & a father to a 5 year old. Idk y bit I've been feeling a bit under the weather with my parenting skills but honestly after watchin this video really put me @ ease & really opened my eyes.... I'm definitely a subscriber!!. Thanks again man!!!. Much appreciated!
Same
Hey man, your not alone. My son can be a bit much too! Much love man and trust me. Your son will thank you later on in life!❤👍🏻
My wife and I have been together from a young age. I have went above and beyond to provide and make sure she has everything she wants. I have spoiled her, and now that we had a baby, I felt like I was an adult and she was still an immature child. This has brought issues into our relationship ship, how did we solve them? I decided to be an adult for just a little longer, and started reading a book with her every night before bed. Crucial Conversations by Joseph Granny. Not only did it help her see how amazing her life is, but it made me realize how many mistakes I was still making. Today were expecting baby #2 and we're stronger than ever. Don't shy away from books dad's, you'll surprise yourselves.
These are great reminders. I have 4 sons and 1 daughter. All the points were spot on, but I particularly like the ones about being present and showing affection. The most difficult part about being a father is we find our own weaknesses. Repentance and forgiveness are a necessary component for relationships.
I think that challenging a son both physically, and mentally helps boys to gain confidence in their body and mind. Give him clear and easy to follow tasks, to build that sense of self accomplishments goes a long way.
For example, I lined up the morning schedule to my 5yo son, once he accomplished it successfully once, and got praised for it, he just did it on his own from that moment on. Same goes for showering by himself , doing a few easy to accomplish house works etc. He even asks to take on more and more responsibilities to show us and himself , that he is a "big and strong boy", that can contribute just as much as his siblings.
Thanks for your channel, bud. I never had a good dad and, he died when I was 12; never guiding me and teaching me how to be a man. I had to learn myself. Now that I'm a father of a 13 year old at almost 40 years old, I appreciate the work you put into these vids. Much love.
This video is great! It’s common sense but for most guys it’s a hard subject to grasp. I got a girl pregnant last year, I promised I stay and support her all the way through, some stuff happened along the way and she pretty much told me to hit the road. This February my first son was born and I love him so much, everyone says he’s so cute, my phone’s camera roll is filled with his pictures. I’m still insecure about being a good dad since I don’t get to see him regularly. I pay the child support and buy stuff like diapers and wipes in bulk. She’s a great mom and he loves his mom, I want my mixed feelings for her to go away for the good of my son.
I'm sorry you are going through that situation. We as men always have a different perspective on how we'd like to start a family, but unfortunately in most cases that is turned upside down by sneaky behaviours from women. Baby trap is just one example. . Good luck with being a great dad .
Whatever you do, be there as much as you possibly can and never disrespect her in front of him. You’ll be just fine. Cherish the time you do get with him. When he’s older he’ll ask to be with you more and more and you’ll have a great relationship. Think about coaching or helping coach his sports teams. That will get you a ton of time with him just helping him and his teammates become better humans. I just got done with assistant/safety coaching my first football season with no experience whatsoever (playing or coaching) and we are now closer than ever. 3rd/4th graders. Highly recommend trying it yourself! You can do it!
Take her to court and get access to your son. Don't give her any ammunition to use against you. Get the best lawyer you can. Good luck and God bless.
There's this present pain in my heart seeing my son being deprive to have a father like you describe. His dad is still alive but he has a limited knowledge on how to be a father and maybe his childhood has something to do about that but I can't still fully accept that reason. I believe that having a very good role model father while growing up is necessary to build a right foundation to follow but a fatherless children can still be a good parent because of his love and care for his child.
Showing your son how to protect himself at a young age is a huge one!
I was raised by a single mom.and to this day there's so many personality flaws I had to work thru...my mom loved.the hell out of me and did a great job but it's just not the same...I never had anyone to teach me how to "be a man", how to deal with women, emotions, nobody taught me how to fix things, no "wise" man in my life with all the answers a boy or teen needs....if you have a son you have no idea how much being there will make in his life...I have a son now, I have no role model whatsoever to base our relationship on, but I'm gonna be around and I figure that's all I can do and try my best...I just wish I had someone to tech me what iw was supposed to do
The challenge is getting them to listen.
OUTSTANDING VIDEO - Thank you!
My wife and I are so proud of our two boys, they are critical thinking, loving and compassionate people who are still connected to our Family.
Your 7 habits for Fathers are SPOT ON, thank you!!!!
This was very reassuring for me.
My partner of 5 years has two teen boys from her previous marriage (pre-teen when we met) and the take away message in this video is "just keep doing what's coming naturally" 😊
I wasn't looking for this video, watched it anyway and was impressed. Thanks random algorithm.
I happen to have the best Dad to ever have existed
My son has taught me many lessons. Whenever I do something out of character he ask me if my father treated me like that. It reminds me that I do not want to repeat how I was treated as a child and helps me fix my behavior. If I snap at him and call him a name or degrade him like my father did I always apologize. I’m not perfect, but I know generational patterns can only be changed by me.
It never occurred to me that me being there for him is what he needs rather than I try to become a dad that is perfect...
I become a dad at 17, and im so scary because i dont have any support from my parents, but im so happy that i watched this video cause it helped so much thank u
I have a tough Italian father. American fathers do everything that your saying. Italian fathers love their kids in their own way.
I had terrible parenting, especially from my dad, and decided to opt out of having kids entirely. It might have been different if I had had this sort of mentoring in time to do something with it
What a wonderful video - thank you. I am a new father - I didn’t have a great role model, so I’m searching for content like this.
The only hug my dad ever gave me was when I got into law school. I kiss and hug my little boy multiple times a day. It’s a wonderful feeling, sad that my dad missed out on that.
💯 your son is watching you and learning. Yesterday we were trick or treating, and I was picking up candy wrappers that were littered on the sidewalk. After about 5 wrappers I picked up, my 2 yo began racing me to the wrappers to pick them up first! Lead by example. Many of us could have used better examples; don’t do those negative things that will still come to mind about your father.
Being a good father to me, is a father who is what his child needs not what he wants to be for the child. Adapting to the needs of the child
Thank you so much for your advice. You have a new subscriber. I have a two year old, and I want to be the best dad for him. My dad is old school and he used to come home and read newspapers and books all the time, and work. He provided us with food and house and basic necessities, but never gave us attention, or encouraged me to do anything. And I want to be the opposite of what he didn’t provide us with as far as connection, and emotional support growing up. I learned so much by watching others. But I will be best for my kids.
This is a great video for parenting.. I will add something in here: find a family/friends that have the same mindset and and learn from them. Sons,daughters. When they were just born. They all same as a computer hard drive, is empty, what ever you teach, show and your actions, that is what they will lean and pick up kids are very smart even at early age. Thank you for making this video..
Excellent framework. I would add things like the following:
- Hardwork and enjoying the process and being proud of the out come.
- Be generous
- Seek for truth and defend it
- Understand what real physical, emotional and moral strength is and how and when to use it
- Do things for the right reasons and not for recognition.
- Understand that life is what you make it and that no one owes you anything.
- Stoicism
- Bring value to the people closest to you and the world
- Forge genuine relationships
- Be a peace maker whenever possible.
My son is my favorite person in the world!
I have a 5yo girl and a 3yo son. Ive always wanted a daughter so i wonder if i would love my son as much as my daughter. But when he was born and i met him the first time, i was blown away by how lovely he is.
And yes i provide a lot of physical affection. I wrestle and bite him a lot 😂.
I was hit by my dad as a kid alot lol, but I thank him everyday for hitting me because that set me straight. I just want to be a different type of dad and not the way my father was.
My father never hit me and I turned out fine.
I grew up with a father who basically hid behind an engineering job & left the woman to raise the kids. He also never missed an opportunity to express his disdain for the fact I wanted nothing to do with following the same path he had followed. Oh yeah - I was their adopted son on top of all that. My childhood was sad, cold, empty, and as an adult I’m still struggling to repair the damage. It sucks. Bad.
Find what was good about him and move on.
so sorry you went through that. You deserve to be happy
Outstanding video. Let your sons see your strength as a man emotionally and physically. Show them what a man is. Let them see your struggles only to become triumphant over them. Let them see you work and but never quit. In leading by example you can mold them into the Men this world needs.
Can’t believe this channel exists. Very sad but needed for most.
I’m a new Dad. Great points for me to think about. Awesome video!
Congrats and thanks for the feedback. Think AND take action :)
For someone who grew up with Out a father, I really appreciate your channel. Thank you! When is the new video?
Wow i didnt know how much information this video had. Definitely good one
First time new dad here and I couldn’t be any happier! I finally get the to the dad I never had
This video opend my eyes
Okay, I'm on the right track. Phew!
Great stuff. Note to self.,..Stop calling your son's mom/your wife crazy in front of him.
I agree but there is an actual dilemma when you co-parent behaves in a way that you can’t allow your kids to - drunkenness, laziness, lack of foresight, dishonesty.
That’s when it gets hard. Probably default to teaching open respect but private real talk as they age
5 weeks away for my son to be born cant stop watching these video thankyou
@DadUniversity I couldn't agree with you more. This makes me feel good. Thank you
Great advice. Only thing I would add is to say you’re sorry when you make a mistake.
For some men, their idea of being a good father is living in the same household as their chil/children, and providing basic needs.
Kindly elaborate this I think it resembles me & I wand to learn from this point of view as well. TIA
Thank you for this channel and all the hard work you’ve put into it.
Thank you so much for your lesson. I have been forgetting so many of what you said and almost became a horrible dad to my son. Even this morning again sigh........ Thanks again for your warning and I will keep all these in my mind and try to be back to the nicest dad I used to be.
Wifey hits 38 weeks next week, little bugger is gonna pop out any day now , one thing I learnt from my father was communication - not something I had a great deal of with my dad may he RIP - I will make sure to keep the communication channel always open. I want him to be able to talk to me about anything sports, girls, cars, school life ANY and EVERYTHING. However, I would want to set boundaries - can you explain how to keep a good balance between a friend and a parent ?
While I understand the concept of being a "friend" you really are a parent that has great communication with your child. It's not really being a friend. It isn't an either/or so there isn't a balance. You create a bond of trust and communication so they do feel safe telling you anything.
@@DadUniversity thanks for the advise - I guess we are looking to be the "cool" parent. Guess it's just something will have to learn as time passes
I literally just commented on a video about this and then it pops up right after the video ended. Thank u.
RUclips algorithm is scary like that ! Glad you enjoy the videos!
one piece of constructive criticism on this video: when you spoke about loving unconditional, not loving a kid for their accomplishments. I think it really helps when we encourage our kids and praise them for their effort, not just for no reason.
Have to put here more thumbs up as there is possibility only for 1 above so...👌🏻👌🏻👍👍👍💪💪💪 100% apriciate your video. Everything you said is true!
Sir this is spot on. I want to study at your university but I am in England.
Very coherent Dadding 101
So Therese is university’s for Dads ! Hahaha I love it 😁
I wish I could download this into my brain
When I get home from work we grab the gloves and ply catch. We keep things simple I do this everyday
Thank you for this video 🙏🏽
Thank you
Hello, Dad University. I have stumbled upon this great video of yours while browsing on RUclips.
As a father of two boys, I think every man should watch your videos.
Thanks for your positive advice!
Thank you for the comments. Glad you found us as well!
Brother I can say only amen after your words! Amazing video, thank you
Thank You. Very insightful.
Great video. Thank you for sharing this list
You’re doing great work my friend
Being nice to his mother is huge. My Dad talked shit about Mom and complained about her and having to pay child support/alimony... That'll make your kid's self-worth non-existent...
Now I'm 31 and thinking I'll just not ever have kids. It makes me sad but I'm afraid I'll become him somehow.
Thank you so much for this kind of content. I grew up without a Dad and for me it's so important to know and do what I should in order my son grow happy...
Thank you for being here and making the effort. It's important!
Keep in mind, in regard to speaking positively about his Mom, that you CAN acknowledge her behavior if it's inappropriate or negative, but acknowledge the behavior and make sure you don't insult her character.
Ephesians 6:1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.
Ephesians 6:2 Honour thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise;)
Ephesians 6:3 That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.
Ephesians 6:4 And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
Ephesians 6:5 Servants, be obedient to them that are your masters according to the flesh, with fear and trembling, in singleness of your heart, as unto Christ;
Thank you for your videos! I do a lot of the things talked about in your videos but I still have so much to learn. My son just turned 3 and he is just transforming before my eyes. Sometimes I question if I'm doing enough to stimulate him in positive ways. It's nice to have these videos to provide a bit more instruction to things I am doing in daily life.
Great video, this advice is also helpful for moms, grandparents, uncles and aunts, older cousins etc
A good father models the courage to resist blind conformity. This is sorely lacking in our falling empire.
A-freaking-men!!!!! The desire to belong and conform to the tribe against the truth is probably one of the strongest forces in the universe.
why am i watching this entire video while having a thought of becoming a dad as a 14 year old😭😭😭
I'm 16 this year, don't have a son or anything yet and I'm certainly not planning to have one anytime soon. However, not having a dad or a father figure present in my life for the vast majority of my life has made me worried I would not be a good father to my future child. I really want to set a good example to my future child and that's what drove me to watch videos such as this to learn and take notes from. I honestly feel as though I do not lack maturity in terms of parenting in the future, however I am worried that my mental health issues and how I would portray myself acting towards others would be viewed by my child as I'm extremely socially anxious and awkward. Even the interactions with my family members may not come off as so "friendly" as I'm very reserved so I'm afraid that that might not set a good example for my future child. I feel the need to become the best possible version of myself to portray myself to my future child and as I said with my various mental health issues may not be so easy. This video was really helpful and I found the part of "letting my child do things by themselves" very important and informative. I hope I'll be a great parental figure in the future :).
You know what to work on 👍🏻
Thank you 🙏🏾
Ty
I Agree 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Love this Video. ❤
You know, I’ve raised my son, and I would see these and think, “Good God! Who can’t be a good father?!?”
And here you are actually doing something productive and helpful.
Good job, Sir.
Awesome video, keep it up. We need more of these messages out there
On Point!
Fantastic
Very well done, real wisdom here!
this video was very helpful
As per honest experience:
I want to have a special bond with my son/daughter from baby stage till death. I want them to share their doubts, I want them to be open with me, I want to encourage them even if they fail unlike my dad who belittles me every time he gets an opportunity.
Unlike my father who would come home drunk, destroy stuffs and bash me, my mom and my sister and frighten us too when we were kids. This action has made me distance from him early on and made me closer with mom.
Dads being toxic to their kids from a young age really takes a toll later on in the future.
I don't see my dad as a role model while he should've been my role model or where I get inspiration from.
I want to be what my father has failed to do for me, my sister and my mom.
I don't hate my father nor do I love him.
Thank you for your feedback. You will be awesome!
Thanks!
This is very good and helpful. Thank you.
Amazing pointers !! ❤❤