My Coming Out Story | The Journey of a Taiwanese | The discovery, struggles and acceptance.

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  • Опубликовано: 13 сен 2024
  • Happy International Pride Month, everybody! I hope, by sharing my story, I can help provide more perspectives for those coming out and for those who don't understand. Love is love, and I hope all of us will love ourselves a little so we can love others. This video segues into my future ones. I'd love to hear from you in the comment section below as well.
    Love & peace,
    David
    ▶ Content Chapters:
    01:39 Discovery/Confusion
    07:42 Confirming/ Tolerating
    11:41 Coming Out
    13:21 The Transition Point
    18:06 Sexual Orientation vs. Gender Identity
    -------------------------------------------------
    [ Important & Useful Links ]
    🔴 Sexual Orientation vs. Gender Identity:
    www.plannedpar...
    🟠 Terms to Know:
    www.hrc.org/re...
    🟡 Coming Out Resources:
    www.hrc.org/re...
    www.hrc.org/re...
    🟢 THRIVE Lifeline - Chat with a qualified LGBTQIA+ crisis responder for your mental health crisis
    thrivelifeline...
    🔵 Other Crisis Hotlines:
    ostem.org/page...
    -------------------------------------------------
    [Next to Watch]
    🟣 My Secret Boy Crush:
    • My Secret Childhood Bo...

Комментарии • 44

  • @pankuohsuan
    @pankuohsuan  3 года назад +11

    One thing I totally didn't address is how liberal and supportive my mom and my brothers actually were/are. I am lucky to have them as a family but the struggle to come out was still real. Did that happen for anyone else?
    錄製的時候忘了提及媽媽跟弟弟們其實都十分開放且支持。有他們當家人實在很幸運,但是出櫃的過程仍然很掙扎。其他人有同樣的經歷嗎?

    • @adamwroclaw
      @adamwroclaw 2 года назад +1

      Też jestem Gejem 😍

  • @blackflowers1172
    @blackflowers1172 3 года назад +8

    It's incredible how hard early years can be for our folks.

    • @pankuohsuan
      @pankuohsuan  3 года назад

      It sure can be. It's interesting to see that it resonated because I thought I was being melodramatic for a sec when I was watching back. But it really was a tough time for quite a while.

    • @jonahreintner5768
      @jonahreintner5768 2 года назад

      So very true. Even now there is constant risk of bias, discrimination, harassment, and violence. It’s much better now than it was in the 60’s & 70’s when I grew up. But it easily leads to deep disappointment, self hatred, and depression. And it’s difficult, sometimes impossible, for others to understand how hard it is to face all the possible rejection.
      Thank you David for the most excellent video. Love it! Also thanks for all the links for resources. Please keep up the good work.

    • @pankuohsuan
      @pankuohsuan  2 года назад

      @Jonah Reintner Thank you for watching! Your encouragement is greatly appreciated! 🧡

  • @stevenrodriguez3266
    @stevenrodriguez3266 3 года назад +6

    David, I am glad that you pushed through the struggle to come out. The biggest part of this are the conflicts in our own minds. I had the underwear model ads experience too. I am a US-born Latin guy with a Taiwanese boyfriend who just became a US citizen. Just remember that people are all around you that will support you including me. I am glad your family was accepting as this will always be a blessing as you go forward.

    • @pankuohsuan
      @pankuohsuan  3 года назад

      Thank you for you support, Steven! And I'm certainly lucky with my loving family.
      Interesting to hear that you had that experience about the underwear model ads, too. And congrats to your bf who just became a US citizen!

    • @stevenrodriguez3266
      @stevenrodriguez3266 3 года назад

      @@pankuohsuan Thank you so much, I will let him know. Best of luck to you.

  • @stefan0ni
    @stefan0ni 2 года назад +4

    You told that story really well, David. Clear and concise. You’ve a lovely smiley, handsome face too. 😀

    • @pankuohsuan
      @pankuohsuan  2 года назад +1

      @Stefan Thank you, Stefan! 😄

  • @debbieqpie
    @debbieqpie 2 года назад +4

    Dear David, i’m so proud of you, and I’m so sorry we didn’t recognize that you were at a loss and struggled through your teenage years. Love u, dear.

    • @pankuohsuan
      @pankuohsuan  2 года назад +2

      Thank you, Auntie~ Love you, too! Hope all is well! 😘

  • @johnnychen3319
    @johnnychen3319 2 года назад +2

    English has always been my escape, too. Lol
    Glad to see a Taiwanese coming out story. Thanks for sharing.

    • @pankuohsuan
      @pankuohsuan  2 года назад

      Hi Johnny! Thank you for watching and great to hear from another like-minded. I think many of us in the community use a foreign language or two to escape. Hopefully, that also means we reduce our chances getting Alzheimer's or something, haha. 😄

  • @jimchun-chenlin3198
    @jimchun-chenlin3198 2 года назад +1

    Your coming out video resonated with me so much! I am also a Taiwanese living in the US. I came out last year on social media and wound up receiving much support from friends and family. I found myself sharing many similar experiences mentioned in the video. It was hard and struggling indeed. But, I am proud of the decision I made and glad to see you come all the way to accept yourself :) Proud of ourselves and happy pride!!

    • @pankuohsuan
      @pankuohsuan  2 года назад

      Thank you, Jim! Glad it resonated with you and also happy for your coming out! Best wishes to your new found freedom! 😁

  • @denniscnaz2844
    @denniscnaz2844 2 года назад +2

    David, thanks for the video. You are wise in picking the right time to tell your family. It's so funny that after we let our family know, we find out that they are supportive and we could have included them many years earlier. That would have saved us a lot of anguish. I hope that you are continuing your education, as that will be very important for you in the future. Basically, we can (and should) be all that we were created to be. Luv ya; Dennis & Dean

    • @pankuohsuan
      @pankuohsuan  2 года назад +1

      Thank you for watching, Dennis! And yes, you are right it's funny to find our families being supportive after all. I also feel extremely lucky because I know there are many that aren't.
      And yes, education is a must and it's a lifelong process. Never stop learning for sure! 😉❤️ - David

  • @fionayu1154
    @fionayu1154 3 года назад +4

    so proud of you Dave~

    • @pankuohsuan
      @pankuohsuan  3 года назад +1

      Thanks, Jing! Thank you always for your support. Love you! ❤❤❤

  • @shuijin4172
    @shuijin4172 2 года назад +1

    身為一位30多歲的台灣人又是長子,看到您的影片真的有許多啟發。
    例如跟身邊人(異性戀)都無法太深入,尤其是女朋友這種話題...😵‍💫
    出櫃真的是一個需要需要很多條件,當然每個人都不一樣,
    如同您經濟獨立、穩定的伴侶、且離開原生家庭與親族,
    真的是時機成熟了! 成功了!👍
    您母親對您的愛,真的是無比感動。
    恭喜您囉~😀

    • @pankuohsuan
      @pankuohsuan  2 года назад +1

      @shui Jin 感謝您用心的留言!❤
      出櫃真的是不容易。每個人的心態及條件也真的不盡相同。自己是真的很幸運,因為雖然遠在國外,無論是小家庭或大家族內的成員都能接受。但其實就本身而言,出櫃有一部份也是以「就豁出去」的態度。加上自己活得越久越覺得真正會愛且接受我的人,在我的生命裡才是最重要的。我能控制的事就是活出真實的自我,且互相交流教育他人。其餘的就「道不同不相為謀」,也就放下了。當然這些的前提也是環境許可。
      出櫃的決定真的是一輩子都得做的事。每到一個新環境或遇到新的人,腦袋裡還是會有「到底要不要說」的念頭。雖然說不是所有的環境或條件都完美,但至少現在身邊所有的朋友(異性或同性戀)都認識且支持我。對於同志之事不用隱瞞,自己也是充滿著感恩的心。真心希望其他圈內的人也終究能找到一條能活得自在,且開心勇敢地做自己的路。
      Happy Pride Month (2022)!

    • @shuijin4172
      @shuijin4172 2 года назад

      @@pankuohsuan 謝謝您!

  • @edwelty
    @edwelty 3 года назад +2

    Thank you for sharing your story! You are a handsome, articulate and wise man

    • @pankuohsuan
      @pankuohsuan  3 года назад

      @edwelty Thank you for your compliments! ❤️

  • @muhammadmuhaiminhisham7387
    @muhammadmuhaiminhisham7387 3 года назад +4

    Here, may this wisdoms leads you to a better life for you and your loved ones:-
    "See the world not as it is, but as it should be."
    "Nobody should ever feel belittled for whoever they love".
    "Religion is about *PEACE* and *MERCY* of God."
    "When you get to God, He will never judge you based on your sexuality. He will judge and look at you, based on what type of a person you are."
    "God loves us beyond any and everything else, and that’s who we should love first."
    "You're entitled to love whoever you want to, the way that you want to, without the judgement of anyone else."
    "And in the sight of God, *KINDNESS* and *LOVE* are the highest priority."

  • @justinchan1995
    @justinchan1995 2 года назад +2

    Hi David, I'm 18, and watching your video comforts me, knowing that I can also do the same in the near future.
    Every time my dad says GAY or 屎忽佬 (I'm from Hong Kong haha), I have to immediately uncross my legs and speak in a lower voice so he won't notice! Thankfully, my older brother is also queer, so I guess that's God's way for cursing my dad for being homophobic, by making our family 陽具滿堂

    • @pankuohsuan
      @pankuohsuan  2 года назад

      Hi Justin, thank you for watching and for sharing. 18 was such an interesting age for me. I'm sure you are on your way to being your own person, and finding your community and friends.
      It isn't easy when derogatory words and phrases are used for our community, let alone them coming from our family members. I'm not sure about your situation, and things might be hard for now but I hope that it gets better soon for you (and perhaps your brother). If it is any consolation, all the pain and frustration you experience now will make you stronger as an individual. (天將降大任於斯人也, and you know the rest. 😉)
      I hope you get to be your natural self soon, and also do hope that your dad finds his way to love and acceptance. Sometimes, all it takes is having a gay family member or two to change the course of conversations for the better. Stay strong, stay positive and stay awesome. Best of luck. 🙂

  • @paulmiller6647
    @paulmiller6647 2 года назад +1

    Thanks very much for the upload.

    • @pankuohsuan
      @pankuohsuan  2 года назад

      And thanks so much for watching. 😉

  • @Hermann0628
    @Hermann0628 3 года назад +1

    Proud of you David ! respect !
    -by your high school friend ~

    • @pankuohsuan
      @pankuohsuan  3 года назад

      Thank you, Hermann! 😉 This means a lot. ❤️ Still remember our good times in high school for sure, my friend! Hope you are doing well!

  • @williamm8240
    @williamm8240 3 года назад +2

    Congratulations on your coming out. It is a long road that we travel to find peace and happiness. Is Dan going to be in your videos?

    • @pankuohsuan
      @pankuohsuan  3 года назад

      Thank you, William. It definitely is a long road. And yes, Dan will make appearances in the future. 😉 Stay tuned!

  • @rjcarter2904
    @rjcarter2904 2 года назад +1

    Wow! I'm glad I came upon your coming out video. How touching. How poignant. You brought a little tear to my eye. You're very handsome and seem so sweet. I wish only good things for you.

    • @pankuohsuan
      @pankuohsuan  2 года назад +1

      Thank you for watching, RJ, and for the compliments. 😉

    • @rjcarter2904
      @rjcarter2904 2 года назад +1

      @@pankuohsuan You're welcome. It was sincere. BTW, I see in some of your later videos you have let your hair grow a bit. The high and tight was a sexy look for you. Why did you give it up?

    • @pankuohsuan
      @pankuohsuan  2 года назад +1

      Thanks, RJ! And it's interesting to hear that the high and tight look is favored as I also have gotten a different feedback. I do cut it short every month. I just do let it grow to a good length before I do get a trim. Haha Never too long though because I don't really enjoy long hair. I'm sure I'll appear with the shorter look in a vid at some point. 😉

    • @rjcarter2904
      @rjcarter2904 2 года назад +1

      @@pankuohsuan Awesome. I don't like long hair either. I keep a skin fade with a #1 on top. Cut it at least every two weeks.

  • @traceylam184
    @traceylam184 3 года назад +1

    Love you, David. 🥰

    • @pankuohsuan
      @pankuohsuan  3 года назад

      Love you, too, Tracey~ ❤️

  • @christinalai4832
    @christinalai4832 3 года назад +1

    Always here for yoy~and I know you are the same ^^ Love you