you won’t look at social anxiety the same after watching this video.
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- Опубликовано: 9 июн 2024
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You are making great point.
What happens when we let go of negative beliefs?
Just vanish - imagine if we have a magic wand and we can make puff and make social anxiety + uncomfortable emotions go magically away - and they do not exist anymore.
What would happen?
Well - what would happen - our defense mechanisms would be gone.
Now - we would be exposed to toxic people!
Social anxiety stems from exposure to toxic people. We defend against their criticism, scrutiny, pathological lying, manipulation and control through social anxiety.
Without social anxiety -
toxic people would become extremely visible.
Their insults would hurt much more.
Toxic people target our errors, mistakes and flaws - and now this will be fully visible.
We will notice that we can divide now toxic people into two main groups:
1) toxic people who have no power over us (strangers)
2) toxic people who have some power over us (toxic boss, toxic colleagues, toxic customers, family members, neighbors) - any person that we cannot cut off, but in the same time they influence our money income or security in some way.
When we are dealing with toxic people who have no connection with us - we will cut contact with them immediately, in natural way. This way we have avoidance in social anxiety. So avoidance is rational. CBT will tell us that avoidance is abnormality. So CBT is toxic - because of double binding - not seeing the whole picture and by telling us that toxic people do not exist.
When we are dealing with toxic people who have some power over us - we cannot cut contact with them.
If we do not have money, if we do not have financial support to move away - we will be stuck at toxic job and toxic family and toxic part of town or country that is shame culture based.
How toxic people control us?
They nitpick our errors - they blame us that we are the problem. That we caused some problem to them and to the community. They paint our errors, flaws, imperfections as abnormality, as our choice, as our permanent condition and as us being toxic - that we are causing pain and harm to the other people -
When we are normal, healthy and sane - we will have amount of moral and ethical standards - which now will be used against ourselves - we will feel urge to fix our flaws and mistakes and errors - and this is how toxic people farm us and make us obedient to their commands. When toxic people have power over us - mostly through money income- we will be forced to be people pleaser and pushover and to feel shame and guilt all the time - which toxic people will flood us with.
Toxic people are micro-managers - they always find errors and flaws - even when we do perfect job.
When we end up fawning - we will suppress our anger - which will give boost to toxic people to be even more abusive.
We end up creating fake social mask - with codependency and smiling and people pleasing.
So when we remove social anxiety - this clarity who is toxic will become highly visible.
This is called in psychology processing the pain, processing the emotions - so that we do not mask them.
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Young American explained why she left Croatia:
"In Croatia people constantly express intrusive opinion about matters which are none of their business. The most irritating things were rude people."
(poslovni hr)
Young American explained why she escaped from Croatia:
"Often I heard Croats intruding why am I eating something, or commenting about what I wore. There is no such thing in America, we allow people to be what they want to be."
"Living in Croatia was like being in toxic romantic relationship"
Vid is so true. You also have to stop the idea that you have to be calm all of the time. Non-anxiety people accept whatever feelings they process. They don't seek to always be non-anxious. Plus you grow the most from discomfort.
this is really helpful for me. i’ve usually associated my intensity of energy with anxiety by default and have limited my range of emotions as a result making my experience even MORE inauthentic and distorted. what a sweet reminder. thanks 💚
Yes!!! Absolutely Dean. I noticed the pain/suffering isn’t the anxiety itself. It’s just a feeling. What’s actually causing the suffering is my resistance/attitude TOWARDS the feeling.
Surrender is everything. Thank you for your comment brother 🤗💛🙏
@@madisun3445let it all FLOW! glad you found resonance in this message. it’s absolutely freeing to allow yourself to feel whatever is present. 💚🙏 much love to you.
@@madisun3445 understand that your feelings you can't control. They'll arise then leave. Meditation is good for this. It's the same with thoughts.
@@Corthespiritualrockstar exactly, man. RUclips Brad Yates - Surrender vid. Really good tapping vid for that.
This was a massive breath of fresh air thank you for your wisdom 💚
Hi Niamh 😁💚 You’re very welcome and I appreciate you watching until the end!
Your mind is often your worst enemy.
ETA: I was going to say I like your glasses, but wow! Beautiful eyes!
Absolutely! and we are often too close to our minds it realise its behaviour. And thanks for the compliment! And, I love my glasses, I got them in Japan and they fit my small head much better than the overpriced crap ones here in Australia haha.
🙏😁💛
Mind is not problem. The introject is - toxic shame, inner critic - voices that we collected from psychopaths around us.
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If you've been in abusive relationship, you've been entrained hourly, daily, weekly, monthly to think like this about yourself and about reality. You've now got to counter that conditioning in the other direction, you've got to be pretty disciplined. You can't be passive. It's like strength training, skill training, like Martial arts training, Kung-Fu. You don't want - do it anyway, you are building skill. To see introject is level 1. Now resist it.
🟥 RICHARD GRANNON
Surrendering things to the universe is the way and the life! 💚
💚🤗 it sure is my friend! I need a bracelet that says “Surrender” lol
Lots of love 🙏
Much love to you also 🤗💚
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Hi Madisunnnn 💚🙏 thank you I appreciate your comment and resonate with your other comment so much.
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
JUST MADE IT TO THE END 💚💚💚💚 HAHAHA
Hahahahah 💚💚💚 thanks for comment while mid- watch lol 🤗 sending you gooooood vibes 🙏🤗😁