I’m thankful for access to the internet. I’m thankful that people from all over the world are able to share their stories/insights/opinions on forums such as this one and, for the most part, be free of judgment.
Crying because I'm overwhelmed with the restrictions in my life at the moment. But even the way you talk and how your humour works shifted my mood so it's a little less painful. Thanks Frank ❤ ENFP
As someone who has been in two house fires, we were thankful both times THAT WE WERE ALL ALIVE (also our cats were rescued). There is always something to be thankful for!
@@ashleypresley Nope, these fires happened in Michigan. One when I was 6 and one when I was 15. My stupid teenage brother started the first one. The second one happened because a neighbor from two houses down started a fire in a vacant house between our houses while playing with matches. The wind happened to be blowing in the direction of our house. The fire starter's house was just fine. :\
I have this little hand painted money bank but since I don't really have cash I I would keep a stack of index cards next to it and at the end of the day I would write atlease one thing that happened that made me smile or happy that day. As time went on I kept finding more things to be happy about (simple things but still...). Then I started to keep a journal of things I looked forward to the next day (definitely not an agenda, more like, "I am excited to grab a cup of coffee and watch a new episode of a show) rather than a list of responsibilities) and the quality of my life certainly went up. I was less irritable and anxious and more present and calm. When I stopped doing that for whatever reason, laziness or lack of time management, I relapsed back into a pretty serious state of depression and anxiety. There were probably other factors that played into my emotional stability but I definitely noticed a correlation between noticing the good things and my happiness levels. Meditation also helped calm my mind down. I would like to start doing those things again.
I've been going through a divorce for the past few months and completely overcome with depression and sadness and feeling like I'm spiraling out of control while trying to make sense of everything. I cleaned out my office and found my old psychology books and remembered that I tested as an INFJ. I researched it more and found your videos. I'm starting to realize that everything I'm feeling and all my behavior finally makes sense. Your videos have truly helped me understand what being INFJ means. I think maybe I can start moving on in life. Thank you so much.
Yeah man! Put some gratitude into your attitude Someone gave me a gratitude journal for Christmas thus year All you do is write 3 things a day I am thankful for small things like a warm shower
Yes, absolutely! Because with a shower it does sound simple but when I can't take one I feel bad and all I can think about it how I would like a shower and about all the times I took it for granted
Secret to freedom is separating yourself from rumination/looping thoughts. Stop putting expectations on yourself and then you'll stop caring about about the thought. It's anxiety trying to scare you.
I have complete faith in this approach and it made me really happy to hear you embrace it and offer it to others. For me, it's the bedrock of *resilience* - the quality that allows one to keep going, whatever life throws your way. I don't keep a list or formalise the practice in any way as it's become so deeply ingrained in me that it's pretty much automatic. It's maybe important to say that I still experience sadness, anger, shame and fear - all the nasties - but I think it's essential to acknowledge those feelings and then let them flow through me. They cannot 'stick' for long if you reframe, refocus and see the positive...🙂❤️
because, although they knew God, they did not glorify Him as God, nor were thankful, but became futile in their thoughts, and their foolish hearts were darkened.” This was a great video FJ. I pray your thankful..
That's actually the law of attraction! whatever you perceive or whatever you think, the universe will reflect it back to you. It will give you more of it. As a matter of fact your current reality is just a reflection of your most recurrent thoughts or your beliefs. It's fascinating stuff ! And by the way learning a new word and starting to see it everywhere is the law of attraction at work as well, so yeah. Thanks for the video Frank ❤
Law of attraction is hocus pocus. Not scientific at all as well as contradicts with peoples' experiences (people who are sick, have accidents, suffer natural catastrophies etc.) It's an interesting thought, to be sure, but doesn't work in practice.
or it's just you have the heightened awareness about something so you notice it more...it's not more comes to you, it's just you now actually notice it. check & check.
Ok but I love the editing in your videos. Those are good tips. When things are difficult, it's important to acknowledge how we feel and be kind to ourselves but it's equally important not to blow things out of proportion because that's when we start telling ourselves how we screwed up, how stupid we are and how everything is just terrible. We're struggling because it's a part of being human. I'd like to also point out that mental illness can make it very difficult for us to see the positive.
Thankful for all you do FJ. You've really helped me expand my perspective and feel at peace with myself. You also post right when I wake up, and I get to start my day with a calm, and usually motivational or thought provoking message from you. Keep at it😊💗
I'm so happy I chose to watch this one tonight. It illustrated my feelings yesterday. I wasn’t in a negative space, but I did get an unexpected surprise that made me very happy. It came from someone I thought was mad at me, so I was tickled pink to find that wasn’t the case. 😊 Regarding this video, I agree that we must train ourselves to look for the positive, really on a daily basis, and be grateful for something in order to stay out of the pit of despair that can draw us in. I am always grateful to have found your channel Frank. You've taught me many things by just being you. Thank you for starting this channel 5 years ago. 😘💜
This works except when you feel sad about something and then think about things you’re grateful for to make you feel better but you’re still sad so you feel guilty for feeling sad when you have good things in your life. I think that’s probably why this is a skill that needs to be built over time. If not you ending up only being grateful as a way to cheer you up in dark moments but you end up feeling guilty for being sad when you actually have good things in life. I don’t know if anyone else has felt that way but I have a lot. It’s a really toxic thought loop. Thanks for the video!
At the very least and at the bare minimum, I am thankful that I am alive and able to experience the ups and downs that come with it. Good non-hippie message, don't resist life!
What ive been doing lately: put a smile on my face, and smile from my eyes too. Makes you and everyone else feel better. And put out positivity. I can be hatin on myself, but sitting on the bus thinking: i hope that person over there has a good day. It does work. Stop the cycle of negativity. You can choose not to perpetuate it from others.
@@ColinBurmingham hm cool. I just ask because there's a song in my church that has almost those exact lyrics. But I guess maybe it's a Christian hymn not specific to my church actually. That's a song right. I'm LDS.
@library of dragons Lift your eyes to Heaven, He's got your back. Remember it's by grace we are saved, not by works. He died for us while we were still sinners. Don't give up trying. Give Him your burdens because he cares for you. Enter His gates with thanksgiving and His courts with praise.
Another reality that came to mind is that once you start, without even realizing it the spiral starts to reverse to where the list of blessings coming to mine seems endless. You think of one oh, and before you finished writing it, another one has already come to mind. There's no pressure to write a lot, but little effort is needed once you get started. It's amazing
I celebrated, in August, 5 years of daily gratitude practice. It’s been transformational. That Bing Crosby song is so good. My favourite Christmas movie. The costumes are incredible and so many great songs....off on a tangent....I think gratitude is most profound in the difficult times...like a light that guides one through the darkness. Here’s something good when your house is on fire: If your house burns down, you can be grateful for the clean slate that you will now - by default - have.
My mom has a cool quote on her kitchen wall: " what if you woke up today with only the things you thanked God for yesterday?" You're right. The negative and what we are lacking in our lives and miss seeing all the blessings that, I believe, outnumber the negatives.
I quit social media forever ago and have no regrets. The one thing i feared was losing touch with my friends, but i just make sure to reach out and text them, set up phone/video chats every now and then. Way healthier. Good on you.
Kelly Lyons thanks kelly, I’m progressively trying to do it now, I’ll quit for a week and see the results, then decide what’s best from there, again thanks for taking the time to read my comment and thinking of a reply and actually typing every word, I appreciate that.
Good stuff, Frank! Being thankful is a useful mind switch tool. Purging sources of negative memories to stay future - focused is something I find beneficial. I just did it yesterday. I feel free and fantastic!
Frisky pony here 🐎 I love this! I use this technique to cope with anger and depression. I find 5 things I’m thankful for, and they can’t be the same thing all the time or silly, they have to be heartfelt at that moment, as that is what brings the positive feeling that comes with authentic gratitude. Thank you for this excellent reminder. Your channel is absolutely wonderful and enriches my life and I’m certain the lives of so many. Thank you for sharing yourself with all of us.
Prestidigitation was an answer in a crossword puzzle I did yesterday, and here it is again in your video, so what you say is exactly right... When you notice something you tend to see/hear it again soon afterwards. Funny that it was exactly the same word as your example, I feel like this is so meta!
I’m 31 years old and I’ve never heard the word prestidigitation ... so now I’m literally going to be waiting to hear that word lol This is the video I needed to hear about a year ago! At the end I learned that whether you are grateful and positive or negative you are still going to go through your circumstance... sooo you might well have a good “vibe” while going through something than a negative, which will only make it so much worse!
Great advice FJ. Practicing gratitude can only lift you up ✨ And about that last statement, I don’t think you’re being naive at all. You are completely right, you can either practice gratitude and acknowledge all the good in your life or be a prisoner to your own mind. Manifestation is a real thing though and the human mind is a very powerful tool (more so than we even realize) The more you practice gratitude, the more opportunity you are giving yourself to be open to receiving even more blessings 🥰 To whoever is reading this, I hope life is treating you kindly and that you have a great day 🌻
Fun fact: Learning a new word and hearing it everywhere shorty after is a little phenomenon known as the Baader Meinhoff effect. It is quite fascinating :)
Being a natural giver , I've also found that even when mad at my partner or whatever, continuing the "give" to them OR a stranger improves my mood. Altho shutting down is our usual response, we gotta curb that if only to help our inner self 😁
Frank, you can definitely be thankful for your beautiful eyes, good hair, nice voice, high iq, great sense of humor and... decorating skills, because i just stare at the elegant vintage pieces of furniture in the background of your videos. thanks for the advice and knowledge you share with us. so helpful!
Every morning I do my affirmations and say my thanks. Especially for the things I hate. Because they teach more powerful lessons oddly enough. This video was perfect. Thanks Frank! Thankful to have you to wake me up and make me laugh or smile. Also, I really like the quote from Garden State, " if you can't laugh at yourself, life is going to seem a whole lot longer than you want it to be."
Idk if you'll see this, but thanx a lot.... I needed this so much, since I'm one to think of a million things in one full 10 seconds... Much appreciated 🖤
"You never know what you've got till it's gone". That's the problem: We tend to take all the good things we have for granted. I went for a walk one day and I passed by a hospital where I saw a young man in a wheelchair sitting inside looking out the window. He was looking quite sad which made me think that maybe he had recently been in an accident and lost the ability to walk. This was just speculation of course, but it made me realize how lucky I am to have a simple thing as the full use of both my legs. Here I was, walking down the street without giving any thought to the fact that I could, while someone else might never be able to walk again.
Is this some hippy "S"? 😂 I 100% agree. I also think it's important to eat well, sleep well and stay hydrated. Feeling negative is a sign that I'm physically off track. I'm grateful for my leisure time to watch RUclips. :D
Thankful for the few minutes I get to sip coffee and listen to you give us some needed hippy speak .. and for you warming up your lava lamp so it was doing it’s thang .. yay! 😁
When I am at my darkest, I always try to list what I am thankful for. I believe that if everyone threw their problems out on the street, where you saw other people’s problems, you would choose to take your own back. There is always someone that has things worse than you.
You know I feel like you're that friend who I gave advice to and then there comes a time when I need that same advice and there you are. I just had a thought when my mother was in labor with me something happened where we both almost didn't make it and I started to think what if my mother didn't make it, but I did. I started to wonder what if the grace of having a mother on this earth was taken away from me. I began contemplating what life would have been like growing up, who I would have lived with, how they would have treated me, what kind of a person would I be. I commenced to be thankful that I have my mother in my life and that I've had the opportunity to even be alive, there are many instances where I could have not made it, but for the grace of God go I. I have met many people around my age who either lost their parents or didn't have them. Not to go on a tangent but it makes me think of orphans in other countries who don't have anything and how we have so much to be thankful for that we take for granted every day. Seemingly simple things take on a novel meaning when seen through the light of gratitude.
Reminds me of a Kurt Vonnegut quote I’ve always liked - “I urge you to please notice when you are happy, and exclaim or murmur or think at some point, 'If this isn't nice, I don't know what is.’” I’m usually smugly satisfied that I know every big word you use, but prestidigitation was a new one for me. I somehow doubt I’ll start hearing that word everywhere, even now that I’ve been exposed to it, but who knows - maybe I’ll get into a conversation about the movie The Prestige or something like that. 😂
Hello Pollyan... erm, Frank! (I'm kidding. I really liked this video. And I think *you're absolutely right!* ) It's happening to me with "glow up" (the prestidigitation thing, I mean). I see it everywhere now. I read it's a cognitive bias, but I don't remember its name. If my house is on fire, I'm thankful because I got rid of all the useless stuff I hoarded. Or, I won't have to clean it anymore (no better way than fire to get rid of bacteria and germs!). Or, I don't need to use the heating for a while... Okay sorry. When I was little, a priest told me: "If you want to become a better person and pray in a way that is more suitable for you, everyday when you start praying, first think of all the good things that happened to you and be thankful; and then think about how you didn't see them, or how you misused them. Think about all the things you could have done better or you did wrong, and make the resolution to pay more attention to them -- he was also talking about the good things, not only my mistakes -- and act accordignly. When you have done this, and you have asked for forgiveness, than you can start asking God to give you things. But first think about those things and try to change that about yourself". I have to say it helped me a lot! Also in my relationships with people. A few days ago, I was thinking something similar to what you said about thankfulness. It was related to success though. I was thinking that I know some people that prefer to focus on the few positive and good things they have. They are happy about them. And I think those people view those achievements as a form of personal success. Even if it's not the kind of success that "society" thinks of (having a lot of money, fame etc.). But those people tend to feel happier. Well, I realized that there are a lot of people that are envious of them. And I think that's because those envious people never payed attention to the fact that those who feel happy had actually worked hard to get those results. Envious people only focus on the fact that someone has something they wanted but never got (sometimes it's just being happy about our lives). I came to the conclusion that we are more likely to be happy when we don't make our happiness "depend" on other people. Yes, also in the sense of: "I have to feel fulfilled even if I don't have a lot of friends", and blah blah blah (I already wrote too much about this!). But I wasn't thinking about that. I've been _a lot_ happier with my life since when I stopped comparing other people's achievements with mine and started to see that always, behind every achievement, there's a lot of work. And even pain sometimes. For example, I'm happy about my brother having a place of his own, and a job that lets him pay the rent and the bills. I wish I had something like that now in my life. But I know he worked super hard to get that, and he would love to have some of the things _I achieved_ (like having a degree and having had the chance to live in another continent for a while). So I don't think it's fair to look at what other people have and envy them, because you never know what they're actually dealing with. And I was also thinking about those people that never had the good things, but when they happen to get something good, all of a sudden they become "bullies" and start demeaning those people who are now in the same place the "bullies" used to be (stupid example, I had a Spanish professor who's lived in Italy for 30 years. She studied Italian and French because they are the easiest languages for us to learn, and yet she still sucked with them. After 30 years living in Italy, she wasn't able to conjugate an Italian verb properly. Well, now that she was in a "superior" position, she used to "take her revenge" on us. So, whenever she saw that our Spanish was better than her Italian -- and trust me, it wasn't that hard! -- she would start to humiliate us by pointing out how bad our pronounciation was, or something like that. And everyone but Chinese students had very low marks with her. Don't get me wrong: I'm glad for those Chinese students. And at least some people got good marks with her!). Well, I think that people like my Spanish professor will never manage to be happy with their lives. And I think it's so sad, because they ultimately achieved something (like becoming a professor, for example), and they're wasting all the good things they have by not being thankful for them. In my opinion. And they're also making other people's lives miserable. Okay, sorry for the essay. I like your lava lamp. :) Have a nice day and get well soon!
Oh no! I hope I'm just overthinking, but I realized that it sounded like I was telling you you're not masculine (by calling you "Pollyanna"). _I'm really sorry!_ I didn't mean it at all. You know, to me Pollyanna is just a character (when I read, I don't think too much about the gender. I usually think about the character's role), so I didn't think it could sound _that way._ You know, my sister calls me Batman sometimes, because I have the tendency to disappear into my "batcave" when I'm home. But she doesn't think I'm not feminine (or at least I hope so!). And I don't find it offensive. Well, it was the same. And again, in case it sounded like that, I didn't even mean to say you're anything like Pollyanna. As I told you, I was just joking. Sorry.
Oh and one more thing before I go to sleep: my Spanish professor was also very good at teaching Spanish grammar. Really one of the best I've ever had. The problem was when she taught translation (especially from Spanish into Italian). She had to ask for help from another professor because she had serious problems with Italian. Okay, now I think I'm done. Bye!
This is what I practice alot. It is what helped get me unstuck out of the dark night of my soul as i call it. I was stuck for a while but came out with so much more self awareness and understanding. Thanks for your videos.
Thank you again. This is something I´have found out for myself, good to know I was heading in the right direction. Watching your videos and hearing your explanations feel a bit like coming home. That feeling that someone really gets you. Thank you so much for sharing yourself, your time and your brilliant ideas.
When I over obsess about the potential for failure in my endeavors, that leads me to procrastinate... It can lead to a vicious cycle of inferiority and self doubt. But we really are smarter than that, if we believe in our abilities and learn that sometimes almost perfect is okay and maybe the heartburn is just heartburn.... 🤙🤙
Gratitude is essential, but it’s important not to warp it into feeling guilty for having unpleasant emotions about the hard things in your life. It is important to acknowledge and validate our unpleasant emotions instead of trying to stuff them down inside through “gratitude”. I’ve mad e that mistake many times. Instead of working through my unpleasant emotions, I would try to block them out by telling myself it could be worse. That lead to a lot of unhealthy behaviors. It comes down to being honest with ourselves. There are good things in our lives and there are sucky things in our lives. It’s important to acknowledge both. A healthy perspective is: “These parts of my life suck, but there are all these other parts that are good and I choose to enjoy them despite the sucky stuff.” I recommend Brene Brown’s “Comparative Suffering” episode of her “Unlocking Us” podcast.
Yes! Good and bad things always exist simultaneously in all of our lives. All I can control is which of those I focus on. Beyond actual problem solving, I have (most of the time) learned to aim my mental energy at the positives! ❤ you & your channel!
Ha! Just finished watching Whit Christmas 😂 Also had the song: “Count your blessings name them one by one. Count your blessings see what God has done....” That song popped in my head too when you said “Count your blessings” 😆
You’re on fire man! P’shaw, panacea, prestidigitation! The creative way you illustrated that thankfulness & gratitude will help prevent a downward spiral. Lovin’ it. 👍
Frank, I find that paying attention to what’s happening in the moment helps. Be more aware and you’ll be handed reasons to be thankful. Also, is it just me or is this video brighter & full of wider shots? I dig it. I’m off to google panacea. Feel better!
yes, being aware is a great way to be more thankful! and oh you noticed! yeah i was using my new camera. the past few videos were shot on my old camera.
Pshaw! I've had bad times, it's terribly stressful, but looking for the good despite that made it bearable until the good thing came along. I lived thru Harvey and that devastation and lost so much, but not everything, and I'm damned grateful for that. You're right: things will go as they will, so why not accept and try to see the beauty instead of worrying about what you can't change? Good vid, sir.
Omg i believe in the same thing, 4 mins in, i truly believe ppl are negative out of habit, just because of survival. Your channel is right on the money
I'm thankful to myself, to internet, to Google/RUclips algorithm which made me discover I had Depression, anxiety, last year. I'm thankful for you, without whom I would not have had all knowledge about me and the MBTI/cognitives functions, psychology, philosophy. Do you know you have changed my life ? 💙
I love watching your videos, lol you’re so funny and I get you.. completely! Today was one of those downward spirals of negative thinking and it was horrid.. omg.. and I love the fact that you mention, that it’s doesn’t need to “be fake” I hate that so much putting on this facade Practicing thankfulness is hard for me for some reason.. ugh. Just what I needed to hear this evening.. thanks🙏
Being a ‘Frisky Pony’ makes me smile.Thank You Frank.
Paul Baker LOL. Same.
I’m thankful for access to the internet. I’m thankful that people from all over the world are able to share their stories/insights/opinions on forums such as this one and, for the most part, be free of judgment.
Also, thankful for YOU, Frank! 🙃 These types of conversations would never happen without people like you! Remember that.
well I'm thankful for you too, Sam!
Crying because I'm overwhelmed with the restrictions in my life at the moment. But even the way you talk and how your humour works shifted my mood so it's a little less painful. Thanks Frank ❤ ENFP
As someone who has been in two house fires, we were thankful both times THAT WE WERE ALL ALIVE (also our cats were rescued).
There is always something to be thankful for!
Were you here in the California fires?
@@ashleypresley Nope, these fires happened in Michigan. One when I was 6 and one when I was 15. My stupid teenage brother started the first one. The second one happened because a neighbor from two houses down started a fire in a vacant house between our houses while playing with matches. The wind happened to be blowing in the direction of our house. The fire starter's house was just fine. :\
BurgundyandBlue1111 I’m sorry that happened to you, but I’m glad to hear you’re all ok:)
In fact the cats are the first to manage to escape!!!
7:23 "If you look for the light, you can often find it. But if you look for the dark that is all you will ever see."
- Iroh
Here you go FJ:
"Uhh ... my house is on fire. I'm thankful that at least...
I don't have to vacuum anymore."
lol there you go
That is such an INFJ thing.
😆😆 rollin'!!!!
There's almost always a bright side if willing to dig deep lol
at least the fire is keeping me warm
I have this little hand painted money bank but since I don't really have cash I I would keep a stack of index cards next to it and at the end of the day I would write atlease one thing that happened that made me smile or happy that day. As time went on I kept finding more things to be happy about (simple things but still...). Then I started to keep a journal of things I looked forward to the next day (definitely not an agenda, more like, "I am excited to grab a cup of coffee and watch a new episode of a show) rather than a list of responsibilities) and the quality of my life certainly went up. I was less irritable and anxious and more present and calm. When I stopped doing that for whatever reason, laziness or lack of time management, I relapsed back into a pretty serious state of depression and anxiety. There were probably other factors that played into my emotional stability but I definitely noticed a correlation between noticing the good things and my happiness levels. Meditation also helped calm my mind down. I would like to start doing those things again.
You were already the best. And then you quoted that song from White Christmas, and now you're the super-best. I appreciate your brain.
I've been going through a divorce for the past few months and completely overcome with depression and sadness and feeling like I'm spiraling out of control while trying to make sense of everything. I cleaned out my office and found my old psychology books and remembered that I tested as an INFJ. I researched it more and found your videos. I'm starting to realize that everything I'm feeling and all my behavior finally makes sense. Your videos have truly helped me understand what being INFJ means. I think maybe I can start moving on in life. Thank you so much.
So well said man.
It's so simple, but so true.
thanks, Dave!
Yeah man!
Put some gratitude into your attitude
Someone gave me a gratitude journal for Christmas thus year
All you do is write 3 things a day
I am thankful for small things like a warm shower
Yes, absolutely! Because with a shower it does sound simple but when I can't take one I feel bad and all I can think about it how I would like a shower and about all the times I took it for granted
@@HM-rw5dz Exactly 😊
@TNmtn Morning All the small things...nah nah na na na nan na na
Secret to freedom is separating yourself from rumination/looping thoughts. Stop putting expectations on yourself and then you'll stop caring about about the thought. It's anxiety trying to scare you.
Can you explain these better please?
@@fabriciopq1032 umm I think it was explained pretty well
I have complete faith in this approach and it made me really happy to hear you embrace it and offer it to others. For me, it's the bedrock of *resilience* - the quality that allows one to keep going, whatever life throws your way. I don't keep a list or formalise the practice in any way as it's become so deeply ingrained in me that it's pretty much automatic. It's maybe important to say that I still experience sadness, anger, shame and fear - all the nasties - but I think it's essential to acknowledge those feelings and then let them flow through me. They cannot 'stick' for long if you reframe, refocus and see the positive...🙂❤️
@Mybiz Thank you! I love the fact that your cat is called Georgina. So unusual and it really made me chuckle 😸
because, although they knew God, they did not glorify Him as God, nor were thankful, but became futile in their thoughts, and their foolish hearts were darkened.”
This was a great video FJ. I pray your thankful..
That's actually the law of attraction! whatever you perceive or whatever you think, the universe will reflect it back to you. It will give you more of it. As a matter of fact your current reality is just a reflection of your most recurrent thoughts or your beliefs. It's fascinating stuff ! And by the way learning a new word and starting to see it everywhere is the law of attraction at work as well, so yeah. Thanks for the video Frank ❤
Law of attraction is hocus pocus. Not scientific at all as well as contradicts with peoples' experiences (people who are sick, have accidents, suffer natural catastrophies etc.) It's an interesting thought, to be sure, but doesn't work in practice.
Yes, exactly!! Couldn’t have said it better myself 😊
Look up the rice experiment. The water in cooked rice responds to the intention in our words. Made me realize I need to talk nicer to myself.
If I hear THAT word, I think I'll be pretty freaked out
or it's just you have the heightened awareness about something so you notice it more...it's not more comes to you, it's just you now actually notice it. check & check.
feeling grateful to have my morning tea with nine minutes of positivity. :-)
Yea verily!
Ok but I love the editing in your videos.
Those are good tips. When things are difficult, it's important to acknowledge how we feel and be kind to ourselves but it's equally important not to blow things out of proportion because that's when we start telling ourselves how we screwed up, how stupid we are and how everything is just terrible. We're struggling because it's a part of being human.
I'd like to also point out that mental illness can make it very difficult for us to see the positive.
thanks, Marilyn :) and you're right, mental illness does make it much harder to practice gratitude.
Thankful for all you do FJ. You've really helped me expand my perspective and feel at peace with myself. You also post right when I wake up, and I get to start my day with a calm, and usually motivational or thought provoking message from you. Keep at it😊💗
@ducky momo Me too :)
I'm so happy I chose to watch this one tonight. It illustrated my feelings yesterday. I wasn’t in a negative space, but I did get an unexpected surprise that made me very happy. It came from someone I thought was mad at me, so I was tickled pink to find that wasn’t the case. 😊 Regarding this video, I agree that we must train ourselves to look for the positive, really on a daily basis, and be grateful for something in order to stay out of the pit of despair that can draw us in. I am always grateful to have found your channel Frank. You've taught me many things by just being you. Thank you for starting this channel 5 years ago. 😘💜
how you doing now?
@@seaoftra Fine, thanks for asking .😊✌️
It really helps starting small, especially if you're in a difficult place right now. Being thankful for the small things and focusing on the now.
It's almost offensive to try to be thankful in the middle of a negative spiral, but it really does work! Thanks for sharing !
This works except when you feel sad about something and then think about things you’re grateful for to make you feel better but you’re still sad so you feel guilty for feeling sad when you have good things in your life. I think that’s probably why this is a skill that needs to be built over time. If not you ending up only being grateful as a way to cheer you up in dark moments but you end up feeling guilty for being sad when you actually have good things in life. I don’t know if anyone else has felt that way but I have a lot. It’s a really toxic thought loop.
Thanks for the video!
At the very least and at the bare minimum, I am thankful that I am alive and able to experience the ups and downs that come with it. Good non-hippie message, don't resist life!
What ive been doing lately: put a smile on my face, and smile from my eyes too. Makes you and everyone else feel better. And put out positivity. I can be hatin on myself, but sitting on the bus thinking: i hope that person over there has a good day. It does work. Stop the cycle of negativity. You can choose not to perpetuate it from others.
Amen
Count your blessings, name them one by one and you will be surprised at what the Lord has done. 🙏
Are you LDS
Hi, No, not LDS. I am a baptised, born again, Holy Spirit filled Jesus, Son of God lover though. What about you?
@@ColinBurmingham hm cool. I just ask because there's a song in my church that has almost those exact lyrics. But I guess maybe it's a Christian hymn not specific to my church actually. That's a song right. I'm LDS.
Yeah it's an old hymn I remember being told as a child, though don't remember singing it as such. Don't know its origins though.
@library of dragons Lift your eyes to Heaven, He's got your back. Remember it's by grace we are saved, not by works. He died for us while we were still sinners. Don't give up trying. Give Him your burdens because he cares for you. Enter His gates with thanksgiving and His courts with praise.
Dude I love your new words. I love words.
Another reality that came to mind is that once you start, without even realizing it the spiral starts to reverse to where the list of blessings coming to mine seems endless. You think of one oh, and before you finished writing it, another one has already come to mind. There's no pressure to write a lot, but little effort is needed once you get started. It's amazing
I celebrated, in August, 5 years of daily gratitude practice. It’s been transformational. That Bing Crosby song is so good. My favourite Christmas movie. The costumes are incredible and so many great songs....off on a tangent....I think gratitude is most profound in the difficult times...like a light that guides one through the darkness. Here’s something good when your house is on fire: If your house burns down, you can be grateful for the clean slate that you will now - by default - have.
My mom has a cool quote on her kitchen wall: " what if you woke up today with only the things you thanked God for yesterday?" You're right. The negative and what we are lacking in our lives and miss seeing all the blessings that, I believe, outnumber the negatives.
I am thankful that you reminded me of this important point and that you have a cool lava lamp in the background.
My name is Stephanie Douglass and I endorse this tool.
ha ha oh good
R u calling Frank a tool.😀 just kidding. I know what you meant.
depression to me is like a wave, it comes and gone.
I have decided to quit social media, it makes me less anxious when meeting new people
Also your beard makes you look good
I quit social media forever ago and have no regrets. The one thing i feared was losing touch with my friends, but i just make sure to reach out and text them, set up phone/video chats every now and then. Way healthier. Good on you.
Kelly Lyons thanks kelly, I’m progressively trying to do it now, I’ll quit for a week and see the results, then decide what’s best from there, again thanks for taking the time to read my comment and thinking of a reply and actually typing every word, I appreciate that.
Good stuff, Frank! Being thankful is a useful mind switch tool. Purging sources of negative memories to stay future - focused is something I find beneficial. I just did it yesterday. I feel free and fantastic!
yes! it really does work
Frisky pony here 🐎 I love this! I use this technique to cope with anger and depression. I find 5 things I’m thankful for, and they can’t be the same thing all the time or silly, they have to be heartfelt at that moment, as that is what brings the positive feeling that comes with authentic gratitude. Thank you for this excellent reminder. Your channel is absolutely wonderful and enriches my life and I’m certain the lives of so many. Thank you for sharing yourself with all of us.
Prestidigitation was an answer in a crossword puzzle I did yesterday, and here it is again in your video, so what you say is exactly right... When you notice something you tend to see/hear it again soon afterwards. Funny that it was exactly the same word as your example, I feel like this is so meta!
"Thank you", Alanis Morissette
I’m 31 years old and I’ve never heard the word prestidigitation ... so now I’m literally going to be waiting to hear that word lol
This is the video I needed to hear about a year ago! At the end I learned that whether you are grateful and positive or negative you are still going to go through your circumstance... sooo you might well have a good “vibe” while going through something than a negative, which will only make it so much worse!
Great advice FJ. Practicing gratitude can only lift you up ✨ And about that last statement, I don’t think you’re being naive at all. You are completely right, you can either practice gratitude and acknowledge all the good in your life or be a prisoner to your own mind. Manifestation is a real thing though and the human mind is a very powerful tool (more so than we even realize) The more you practice gratitude, the more opportunity you are giving yourself to be open to receiving even more blessings 🥰 To whoever is reading this, I hope life is treating you kindly and that you have a great day 🌻
When I was little we actually had a pony named Frisky.
WHAT!
@@FrankJames LOL yes. I hear you say it all the time and this morning my brain finally connected the two.
@@AshNGrant Wow I love that
ni-iiice.
I'd a dog named Frisky.
This video came at a perfect timing. Thank you so much, FJ!
This is so true. It’s what you are looking for-retraining your mind. Well spoken.
thanks, Michelle, I appreciate it
Fun fact: Learning a new word and hearing it everywhere shorty after is a little phenomenon known as the Baader Meinhoff effect. It is quite fascinating :)
Watched it this morning... Again this evening.. Thank you Frank.
Being a natural giver , I've also found that even when mad at my partner or whatever, continuing the "give" to them OR a stranger improves my mood. Altho shutting down is our usual response, we gotta curb that if only to help our inner self 😁
Frank, you can definitely be thankful for your beautiful eyes, good hair, nice voice, high iq, great sense of humor and... decorating skills, because i just stare at the elegant vintage pieces of furniture in the background of your videos. thanks for the advice and knowledge you share with us. so helpful!
Hippies are cool bro. I was diagnosed with Asperger's yesterday. I am thankful to finally get some answers.
Baader Meinhof phenomenon. Took me a day to remember.
Every morning I do my affirmations and say my thanks. Especially for the things I hate. Because they teach more powerful lessons oddly enough.
This video was perfect. Thanks Frank! Thankful to have you to wake me up and make me laugh or smile.
Also, I really like the quote from Garden State, " if you can't laugh at yourself, life is going to seem a whole lot longer than you want it to be."
You are brilliant. Thanks for sharing. ❤
Idk if you'll see this, but thanx a lot.... I needed this so much, since I'm one to think of a million things in one full 10 seconds... Much appreciated 🖤
"You never know what you've got till it's gone". That's the problem: We tend to take all the good things we have for granted.
I went for a walk one day and I passed by a hospital where I saw a young man in a wheelchair sitting inside looking out the window. He was looking quite sad which made me think that maybe he had recently been in an accident and lost the ability to walk. This was just speculation of course, but it made me realize how lucky I am to have a simple thing as the full use of both my legs. Here I was, walking down the street without giving any thought to the fact that I could, while someone else might never be able to walk again.
I'm thankful I found your channel, Frank. You're amazing! 💜
I'm thankful for you and these videos, FJ!
Thank you so much for this valuable information❤❤❤, many people need this, God bless you and your family
Is this some hippy "S"? 😂
I 100% agree. I also think it's important to eat well, sleep well and stay hydrated. Feeling negative is a sign that I'm physically off track.
I'm grateful for my leisure time to watch RUclips. :D
Thankful for the few minutes I get to sip coffee and listen to you give us some needed hippy speak .. and for you warming up your lava lamp so it was doing it’s thang .. yay! 😁
Thank you Frank, God bless you.
“P’shaw” !!!! I haven’t heard that in so long lol!
When I am at my darkest, I always try to list what I am thankful for. I believe that if everyone threw their problems out on the street, where you saw other people’s problems, you would choose to take your own back. There is always someone that has things worse than you.
Thank you so much for this video
You know I feel like you're that friend who I gave advice to and then there comes a time when I need that same advice and there you are. I just had a thought when my mother was in labor with me something happened where we both almost didn't make it and I started to think what if my mother didn't make it, but I did. I started to wonder what if the grace of having a mother on this earth was taken away from me. I began contemplating what life would have been like growing up, who I would have lived with, how they would have treated me, what kind of a person would I be. I commenced to be thankful that I have my mother in my life and that I've had the opportunity to even be alive, there are many instances where I could have not made it, but for the grace of God go I. I have met many people around my age who either lost their parents or didn't have them. Not to go on a tangent but it makes me think of orphans in other countries who don't have anything and how we have so much to be thankful for that we take for granted every day. Seemingly simple things take on a novel meaning when seen through the light of gratitude.
Reminds me of a Kurt Vonnegut quote I’ve always liked - “I urge you to please notice when you are happy, and exclaim or murmur or think at some point, 'If this isn't nice, I don't know what is.’”
I’m usually smugly satisfied that I know every big word you use, but prestidigitation was a new one for me. I somehow doubt I’ll start hearing that word everywhere, even now that I’ve been exposed to it, but who knows - maybe I’ll get into a conversation about the movie The Prestige or something like that. 😂
P.S. I enjoy the professorial look you have going on, offset by the streamers and lava lamp in the background. Business up front, party in the back.
watch one of your students bust in the door to the classroom and say it
I love you frank. you give such good advice, plus i like your appearance. you're funny too.
I'm thankful for you, FJ
I am glad to see you more positive and energetic :D Thanks for the reminder of positivity!
I am a new suscriber! This videos have helped me to feel a lot better. Really helped me untherstand many things I didnt so iam grateful for it!!!
Hello Pollyan... erm, Frank!
(I'm kidding. I really liked this video. And I think *you're absolutely right!* )
It's happening to me with "glow up" (the prestidigitation thing, I mean). I see it everywhere now. I read it's a cognitive bias, but I don't remember its name.
If my house is on fire, I'm thankful because I got rid of all the useless stuff I hoarded. Or, I won't have to clean it anymore (no better way than fire to get rid of bacteria and germs!). Or, I don't need to use the heating for a while...
Okay sorry.
When I was little, a priest told me: "If you want to become a better person and pray in a way that is more suitable for you, everyday when you start praying, first think of all the good things that happened to you and be thankful; and then think about how you didn't see them, or how you misused them. Think about all the things you could have done better or you did wrong, and make the resolution to pay more attention to them -- he was also talking about the good things, not only my mistakes -- and act accordignly. When you have done this, and you have asked for forgiveness, than you can start asking God to give you things. But first think about those things and try to change that about yourself". I have to say it helped me a lot! Also in my relationships with people.
A few days ago, I was thinking something similar to what you said about thankfulness. It was related to success though. I was thinking that I know some people that prefer to focus on the few positive and good things they have. They are happy about them. And I think those people view those achievements as a form of personal success. Even if it's not the kind of success that "society" thinks of (having a lot of money, fame etc.). But those people tend to feel happier.
Well, I realized that there are a lot of people that are envious of them. And I think that's because those envious people never payed attention to the fact that those who feel happy had actually worked hard to get those results. Envious people only focus on the fact that someone has something they wanted but never got (sometimes it's just being happy about our lives).
I came to the conclusion that we are more likely to be happy when we don't make our happiness "depend" on other people.
Yes, also in the sense of: "I have to feel fulfilled even if I don't have a lot of friends", and blah blah blah (I already wrote too much about this!). But I wasn't thinking about that.
I've been _a lot_ happier with my life since when I stopped comparing other people's achievements with mine and started to see that always, behind every achievement, there's a lot of work. And even pain sometimes. For example, I'm happy about my brother having a place of his own, and a job that lets him pay the rent and the bills. I wish I had something like that now in my life.
But I know he worked super hard to get that, and he would love to have some of the things _I achieved_ (like having a degree and having had the chance to live in another continent for a while).
So I don't think it's fair to look at what other people have and envy them, because you never know what they're actually dealing with.
And I was also thinking about those people that never had the good things, but when they happen to get something good, all of a sudden they become "bullies" and start demeaning those people who are now in the same place the "bullies" used to be (stupid example, I had a Spanish professor who's lived in Italy for 30 years. She studied Italian and French because they are the easiest languages for us to learn, and yet she still sucked with them. After 30 years living in Italy, she wasn't able to conjugate an Italian verb properly. Well, now that she was in a "superior" position, she used to "take her revenge" on us. So, whenever she saw that our Spanish was better than her Italian -- and trust me, it wasn't that hard! -- she would start to humiliate us by pointing out how bad our pronounciation was, or something like that. And everyone but Chinese students had very low marks with her. Don't get me wrong: I'm glad for those Chinese students. And at least some people got good marks with her!).
Well, I think that people like my Spanish professor will never manage to be happy with their lives. And I think it's so sad, because they ultimately achieved something (like becoming a professor, for example), and they're wasting all the good things they have by not being thankful for them.
In my opinion.
And they're also making other people's lives miserable.
Okay, sorry for the essay.
I like your lava lamp. :)
Have a nice day and get well soon!
Oh no! I hope I'm just overthinking, but I realized that it sounded like I was telling you you're not masculine (by calling you "Pollyanna"). _I'm really sorry!_ I didn't mean it at all. You know, to me Pollyanna is just a character (when I read, I don't think too much about the gender. I usually think about the character's role), so I didn't think it could sound _that way._ You know, my sister calls me Batman sometimes, because I have the tendency to disappear into my "batcave" when I'm home. But she doesn't think I'm not feminine (or at least I hope so!). And I don't find it offensive.
Well, it was the same.
And again, in case it sounded like that, I didn't even mean to say you're anything like Pollyanna. As I told you, I was just joking.
Sorry.
Oh and one more thing before I go to sleep: my Spanish professor was also very good at teaching Spanish grammar. Really one of the best I've ever had. The problem was when she taught translation (especially from Spanish into Italian). She had to ask for help from another professor because she had serious problems with Italian.
Okay, now I think I'm done. Bye!
I have pilates at 9 this morning.
That will help with my alignment 🌞
Instant midseat changer :))
& thank you FJ !!
This is what I practice alot. It is what helped get me unstuck out of the dark night of my soul as i call it. I was stuck for a while but came out with so much more self awareness and understanding. Thanks for your videos.
Thank you again. This is something I´have found out for myself, good to know I was heading in the right direction. Watching your videos and hearing your explanations feel a bit like coming home. That feeling that someone really gets you. Thank you so much for sharing yourself, your time and your brilliant ideas.
And while we’re being thankful we should smile too. 😊 It’s a mood-booster. Thanks for the reminder FJ. There’s always a bright side.
Great video Frank! Going to start writing about things I'm grateful for and not being so pessimistic.
A truly grateful heart has great difficulty housing darkness where there shines such a happy light. :)
So thankful for ☕️ morning, noon, and night.
Simple, yet true.
Choosing to be the light, no matter how small.
Keep shining your light Frank!
I can't drink much unfortunately. I have to limit that
Frank , yes! I’m 100% on board with gratitude! It’s truly a path to a happy life (and really seeing the truth).
It does sound super corny when telling someone to practice gratitude. The truth is, learning to do this got me through some of my darkest times.
You've come a long way since the "soul crushing depression" video!
When I over obsess about the potential for failure in my endeavors, that leads me to procrastinate...
It can lead to a vicious cycle of inferiority and self doubt.
But we really are smarter than that, if we believe in our abilities and learn that sometimes almost perfect is okay and maybe the heartburn is just heartburn....
🤙🤙
hey Franky -... i watched some 10 vides of infj stuff.. you are good- keep it up.
I am always grateful! #itygfma #itygfma2 # TINSWGIN💖 Thank you Frank!🌹
Great video! Love the lavalamp, reminds me of my childhood bedroom 😁
Gratitude is essential, but it’s important not to warp it into feeling guilty for having unpleasant emotions about the hard things in your life. It is important to acknowledge and validate our unpleasant emotions instead of trying to stuff them down inside through “gratitude”. I’ve mad
e that mistake many times. Instead of working through my unpleasant emotions, I would try to block them out by telling myself it could be worse. That lead to a lot of unhealthy behaviors. It comes down to being honest with ourselves. There are good things in our lives and there are sucky things in our lives. It’s important to acknowledge both. A healthy perspective is: “These parts of my life suck, but there are all these other parts that are good and I choose to enjoy them despite the sucky stuff.”
I recommend Brene Brown’s “Comparative Suffering” episode of her “Unlocking Us” podcast.
Yes! Good and bad things always exist simultaneously in all of our lives. All I can control is which of those I focus on. Beyond actual problem solving, I have (most of the time) learned to aim my mental energy at the positives!
❤ you & your channel!
Ha! Just finished watching Whit Christmas 😂
Also had the song: “Count your blessings name them one by one. Count your blessings see what God has done....” That song popped in my head too when you said “Count your blessings” 😆
You’re on fire man! P’shaw, panacea, prestidigitation! The creative way you illustrated that thankfulness & gratitude will help prevent a downward spiral. Lovin’ it. 👍
thanks, Ann!
I can’t add to this conversation. But I did practice this for decades.
Thank you Frank!
THANK YOU. I needed this dude. God bless.
Frank,
I find that paying attention to what’s happening in the moment helps. Be more aware and you’ll be handed reasons to be thankful.
Also, is it just me or is this video brighter & full of wider shots? I dig it. I’m off to google panacea. Feel better!
yes, being aware is a great way to be more thankful!
and oh you noticed! yeah i was using my new camera. the past few videos were shot on my old camera.
Frank James Oh awesome! I think I’m a fan of the Canon.
@@FrankJames It wasn't the lava lamp?
This video helped a lot. I'm grateful for you and for the videos you make. Thank you Frank!
Pshaw! I've had bad times, it's terribly stressful, but looking for the good despite that made it bearable until the good thing came along. I lived thru Harvey and that devastation and lost so much, but not everything, and I'm damned grateful for that. You're right: things will go as they will, so why not accept and try to see the beauty instead of worrying about what you can't change? Good vid, sir.
Be grateful - because it has not always been, and it will not always be
Omg i believe in the same thing, 4 mins in, i truly believe ppl are negative out of habit, just because of survival. Your channel is right on the money
Another fantastic video with fantastic advice. Thank you from this frisky pony!!!
I'm thankful to myself, to internet, to Google/RUclips algorithm which made me discover I had Depression, anxiety, last year.
I'm thankful for you, without whom I would not have had all knowledge about me and the MBTI/cognitives functions, psychology, philosophy.
Do you know you have changed my life ? 💙
I can relate to you! 💕
Thank you for using your NiFe TiSe wisely. I find this easier to hear from your way of presenting it.
It’s funny they say INFJs make good cult leaders because I find myself yelling “PREACH!!” when I watch your videos
Great message 👍
Thank you.just what i needed to hear.
Why are you thankful?
I love watching your videos, lol you’re so funny and I get you.. completely!
Today was one of those downward spirals of negative thinking and it was horrid.. omg.. and I love the fact that you mention, that it’s doesn’t need to “be fake” I hate that so much putting on this facade
Practicing thankfulness is hard for me for some reason.. ugh.
Just what I needed to hear this evening.. thanks🙏