When I spiral I reach for my "self-soothe bag/box". I really didn't know what to put in it first, but sensory things are essential: - Smell - a sunscreen that I wore when I was in my happiest place working with dolphins - Taste - childhood favourite sweets, Werther's Originals because they remind me of my grandfather - Touch - favourite stim, which for me are sponges - Watch - my absolute favourite comedy movie (if I have time), Some Like it Hot - Listen - Zelda Breath of the Wild soundtrack or some chill hop playlist - Read - a letter I wrote to myself about how I can achieve anything...
This is brilliant! I love this so much - thank you so much for sharing!! It's sounds like a first aid kit for self-soothing and I can't get enough of it! 🥰🥰
@@HowtoADHD I was SO reluctant at first, I was awash with ablelist thoughts like "you shouldn't need to have that, you are weak to need it" and I really had to tell myself that it is ok, and at the time I really did need to make one for myself as I wasn't coping. Remember, it takes huge courage to ask for help, even more so to reach within for help when you feel truly alone, like I did at the time I made mine 💙 so proud of myself, and now I cherish it.
I really like that this video is edited down a lot less. It feels more real and genuinely makes me feel validated to see someone acting like me and going on different tangents and stuff. It's refreshing to see unmasked ADHD
I feel like my anxiety makes it much harder to stop ruminating, to the point that I don't think I ever stop deliberately. It's great to see that other people have found solutions, though!
Don't give up, I bet there is some way that will work for you too and maybe it doesn't stop it for you but just makes it a little better to deal with in the moment 🥰. Sometimes the goal is not 100%. Like I guess 100% is unachievable either way sometimes.
rumination feeds anxiety because your brain is fooling you into believing that thinking about something is productive and so it keeps going, and it's not, so it keeps going. and it that sense it fools you into an addictive cycle that you do not want but your brain thinks it's solving something. but it's not. self compassion helps. and a walk or change of scenery helps. but self compassion, slowing down the thoughts and giving yourself a big hug before a walk can help.
Same. Wanted to share these: Someone shared a tip in an article for stopping rumination… ask yourself “What is my next thought going to be?” It works really well. Cuts the wire. Also I had my worst rumination and freakouts first thing in the morning until I learned EMD. Upon ruminating, move your eyes (open or closed) from left to right as far as they’ll go, one end of your peripheral vision to the other, sorta like windshield wipers. It both cuts the thoughts and diffuses the ptsd associated with the thoughts and emotion. There is some science to it. For me it works 100% of the time. No more terrible mornings. I woke up with panic attacks for 10 years prior to that. Before that I was using a mantra, saying “Thank you, thank you, thank you” or “ I love you, I love you, I love you.” Up to 100 times if I needed to. The growing gratitude/peace/love declaration would slowly push out the panic/anxiety until it was gone. It worked pretty decently but not as well as EMD and took a lot longer than EMD to get back to good.
I love the "intermediate and advanced" content for ADHD that this channel does. The internet seems like it's stuck in an eternal September with a lot of mental health topics so there endless resources for those in the beginning stages of learning about their divergence. But once you're through that part helpful free resources (and even paid) dry up fast. I also like the idea of asking the community, because once you get to these intermediate/advanced topics, experiences and solutions vary a lot more person to person so monolithic advice and listicles don't work so well, plus they tend to be theorized in an ideal vacuum (ex: "but I have to work some times!"). It's better to get tactics from a bunch of real people.
@@thepinkestpigglet7529 unfortunately no, I can't take credit lol. I ran into the term line a year ago. It's a saying that started way back when the internet was first opening up to the public (1993). The influx of new user was so large that the current user base was totally overwhelmed and from then on there was always more newbie internet users than seasoned ones.
@@fearguyQ Up until 93, the internet was almost exclusively academic, and every September, a new crop of freshman would show up and overrun the Internet. Then they would learn their way around, learn to lurk a bit before posting, and generally get a collective clue. In September of 93, everybody got the internet, and ... You know the rest of the story.
This might be more of a depression/insecure thing, but one of my more potent techniques is what I call "recalibrating" my perspective. When I'm fixated on something negative and can't get my mind off of it I take the time to list off potential positive as well as negatives. Making my perspective on experiences more balanced makes them more boring and harder to fixate on.
This is something I try to do too (when I remember). If I get carried away with my thoughts about the future, whether they're negative or positive, I try imagining the opposite is equally possible. Then it's easier to remember I can't know the future.
I've noticed that you can't be extremely anxious and extremely depressed at the same time, so when you're extremely depressed use that lack of interest in your own wellbeing to choose actions the anxious side of you would never allow.
Smarty you don’t get it do you? Adhd people get depressed an insecure because they fail while their is nothing wrong with their IQ. They see other people pass them by while having more knowledge, skills, passion but just lack control over their operating system. The number of suicide is huge under ADHD people because of not being able to live up to their full potential. There are a lot of studies done in the US and Canada. ADHD is also over represented in jail houses. ADHD takes people into a down words spiral of years of no controle and under achieving to losing believe in themselfs. So recalibrate on that.
When we ruminate on certain past behaviours or events that bring that feeling of shame or guilt, it is part of our brain reminding us that what we did goes against our values or expectations of others. A reminder of how we are a good person with integrity!
little statements like these make everything feel okay in the moment. Makes me feel so not alone and hopeful this too will pass. Regret sucks, but it does mean that we have a conscious
Unless we didn’t do anything “wrong”.. we just said something weird, did something embarrassing or innocent. I like what you mentioned tho- I honestly hadn’t thought of it that way 🧿💜
Yes, and then I'll spiral on analyzing what we consider to be values /correct behavior and where I got those values and why and then into deeper philosophical unsolvable ponderous madness 😂
I struggled so much with this and my doctors kept treating me for anxiety because that's how it presented. Finally one day I put my foot down and asked to be put on ADHD meds and the difference has been incredible. I still have anxiety but the majority of my racing anxious thoughts were just because I couldn't slow my brain down enough to deal with them. So it may seem obvious but medication makes addressing my rumination a million times easier!!!
I am currently struggling with a similar situation. My doctors are unwilling to consider I might have something other than or in addition to anxiety (because I made it to grad school so it couldn’t be adhd! Sigh…), but I highly suspect I have some adhd in the mix.
had a similar experience but my anxiety was less clinical, a lot of my anxiety was about forgetting something that mattered to me or losing track of time
After starting meds, I've noticed my thought spirals are just so much less and a lot less severe. I love how quiet my brain is on meds. If only I had been on meds my whole life, I wonder where I would be now? Hm... let's not go down THAT thought spiral haha
Never go down that spiral. I was on meds as a kid but didn’t use or understand them properly until adulthood. I don’t think children should be on stimulates because of this strange idea that with adhd you can’t get high. You can but because that’s not the goal it’s an adverse effect. It’s not enjoyable being loaded at school when you’re not allowed to move about. I got in a lotttttt of trouble
And lots of times I would get in just as much trouble on meds as off because as a kid I was always on way to high a dose. 70 milligram vyvanse as a kid as an adult I’m on 15 mg adderall. I mean cmon now. Cause as an adult I have a say in a treatment that I didn’t have as a kid.
Same here. I would definitely be in a "different space" at this point in my life. I just have to stop beating myself up for something I had no idea about. Girls when I was a kid didn't have ADHD according to the current place where Mental Health was in relation to what they knew. Still, it stinks. I've dreamt of being neurotypical. causes me to feel sad when I go there... the spiral. Reply
My friend gave me great advice on this that I somehow always forget to follow: "10 minutes of maintenance beats ten hours of ruminating" Basically the moment you catch yourself ruminating, find a moment to step aside and set a ten minute timer. You are not allowed to do ANYTHING for those ten minutes except ruminate on your rumination stuff. Something about having to "actively" ruminate rather than "passively" ruminate makes it... Weird? It feels like shifting gears. Sometimes I get really good insight into how to overcome blocks or even why I'm ruminating on certain things in the first place in those ten minutes alone. But when I actually have to do the ten minute thing, my brain is like "I don't have time for that!!" and I find ways to convince myself not to do it, so I end up forgetting how helpful it's been in the past haha. Thanks for putting this topic on the table! I actually had to stop and follow my own advice, so I guess another suggestion would be "how would you encourage someone to confront [problem]? Could you actively demonstrate it?" It makes it way easier to do for some reason??
This sounds great and perfect for my ADHD 'defiant brain' - if I decide to actively ruminate on a thing, my brain is for sure going to resist doing that and will look for something else to engage with.
ohhh darn is my brain also defiant AND anxiously renumerating! nailed I am brilliant at knowing what 'others' can/should/could do but I am blocked when it comes to me.. I can see with clarity their situation and in a r a B B i t Hole with own place in the world self compassionate
I do this, but I write out what I am ruminating longhand. I schedule a time for it and when my brain starts ruminating, I tell myself that I am free to do ruminate for 10 minutes at 7pm. It works amazingly well. After the 10 minutes are up, the paper gets put away and I don't have to think about those things until the next day at whatever time I pick.
One of the things that has been a life changer for me is to verbalize my thoughts. It's really hard to deal with one thing when you also have a million other thoughts going on in your head, but when you say things out loud it kinda isolates them and also makes it very clear, so dealing with problems becomes easy and often times I realize my problems aren't as bad as they sound in my head.
That is the #1 thing that helps me! And I can only do this when I am home alone or I take a drive and talk to myself like a weirdo. I used to make “voice memos” on the phone when driving to explain to myself what the problem is. Interesting to go back a few years and listen to old ones-Podcasts of myself to myself 🤪😵💫?!? Is that a little schizophrenic?
I do this SO MUCH that I bought some wireless earbuds so I could talk to myself when I was walking my dog and people wouldn't look at me like I was bonkers 🤣
I appreciate that you are also showing a bit of the struggles, feelings of overwhelm and negative thoughts you were having in the moment and that someone came over to help you. I'm wondering if you could show more of this aspect of your ADHD life. I know for me seeing someone struggling the same way I do feels validating. I do often get confused with "simple" tasks I've done a million times before. All of a sudden I'm just completely drawing a blank and I don't understand anymore. I get so angry and ashamed of myself for being "stupid" and just randomly start crying because I'm so overwhelmed and panicking because I'm stuck on something that a "normal" person wouldn't be stuck on. I know I'm not alone but I've never seen anyone else do that same thing. Stop in their tracks by confusion/misunderstanding/forgetting, get hit by a dump truck full of overwhelm, self doubt/hate etc, freak out/cry/yell etc. I think I butchered how I explained this... Hope it makes sense
Thanks! I often think that I'm failing to communicate clearly and yet most of the time feedback seems to be that I do communicate well... Yet I still feel like I do a hatchet job of it.
I’d love to see an episode on the grief that comes with a late/adult diagnosis, wondering what life might have been like if it was caught earlier. Love the show, thanks for all you and the team do ❤️
my brain is actually stuck on that as well. i live in an area where ive been struggling to get a diagnosed. i was actually diagnosed in another city. but when i came back home i had forgotten the name of the duded and who he was from so i had nothing to go off of. and here people dont believe in it i guess. im a 42 year old chic on ssi bc icant hold a job bc even though i have the motivation for half of what i did, i always had bosses that were never patient enough to work with me. i ended up homeless for 10 years. what sucks is that there r programs designed to help people like me get training and actually help us find employment where we can succeed. but you need the diagnoses to do it. and most of the people there had theirs when they were kids. apparently my father was too proud. the school recommended i get testing. so anyways yeah i totally get it. if we actually had the proper diagnoses then. just think where we could actually be. it sucks that everything is finally beginning to change now. good luck to you
I'm a big fan of just physically moving myself to break out of a thought spiral. When I was in college and felt like I was just spinning out, I used go outside to take a lap around the building. At work, I'd sometimes just go to the end of the hall & back. Even just that much movement usually helps me!
I got through my worst nights at uni by pulling on a hoodie, putting on some music, and walking around campus for about an hour (I am thankful for the numerous factors that allowed this to be a consistently safe decision)
I started watching your channel because I have a granddaughter who has ADHD and now lives with me. I wanted to understand her better and be a better advocate for her. What I didn’t expect is to learn so much about myself and how to handle it. I too suffer from spiraling circling thoughts, mostly at night. Getting up to watch a movie or boil an egg or go for a jog is not an option at 2am when I have to be up at 5, but reaching for something that smells good or feels good or listening to a favorite song in order to break the cycle of destructive thoughts is totally doable. Thanks!
i felt so validated when she tried the "dropping anchor" and admitted that, while it worked this time, it might not work next time. thanks, jess. that made me feel better and i don't even know why♥️
I found the dropping anchor bit really, really impressive. As in, she was able to immediately pin down what she was feeling and what she was saying about herself. It would take me a week to get there, in fact that's probably what I'd be ruminating about in the first place!
I actually had no idea that my rumination is a symptom of my ADHD, but it makes a ton of sense. Your videos are so healing- thank you so much for all your are doing.
Awesome content, Jessica. Scheduling breaks helps a lot, and is crucial when working from home. I try to use the last 10 minutes of every hour to reset, with at least one mid-day aerobic activity. Without this routine, I am much more prone to rumination. Reframes like "Would I punish anyone else the way I'm punishing myself?" help me to overcome self-judgemental rumination as well.
That reframe has been so crucial to my self care journey! Knowing that I wouldn't treat other the way I'm treating myself helps me to not push myself to to try to please others when it will negatively affect me. If I wouldn't be mad at a friend for not being up to a get together than why should I be mad at myself? And if the other person is mad at me, especially if they know that I deal with anxiety, then maybe they're not the type of person I should spend time with.
It's so validating and comforting to see you so raw and exposed in your authentic self... even as an "expert" when it comes to ADHD. When I have bad days, I always wonder what I'm doing wrong today, why I can't get out right? Even when I'm medicated. Thanks for normalizing this struggle, and showing us, and others, that is OK, and sometimes it just happens 🤗
So much worse off the meds. Do you have the same issue as me, of sharing you’re spiraling thoughts? That’s my biggest issue.. I feel like as an adult it makes me seem childish. Cause in the moment with high emotions I would say I really believe what I’m saying in that moment. But even minutes later sometimes I’ll realize I was just talking crazy then I get really embarrassed.
I get gaslit a lot a work and that really makes me spiral and sometimes even just think everyone is against me and I’ll just try not to talk to anyone until my head evens out again. But It happens constantly which then sets me on another spiral and then when I’m working a lot of ot then not getting any sleep because Im stuck overthinking.. gosh that’s when it gets bad. When i work 70 hours in a week and only get like 18 hours of sleep.. god I get crazy. Adderall on no sleep will get you paranoid to.
I've heard somewhere that our brains will spiral on problems it's afraid of forgetting. Basically, our subconscious is recognizing a problem and keeping it in active memory so it can be resolved. So the best way to put down thoughts is to confront them, like writing it down or setting a time frame for when you'll deal with something. It just needs to be some way of validating your brain's concerns so it can move on. It doesn't always help depending on the type of spiral, but it does often help me. Another trick I use is to imagine the thoughts as something physical, then mentally put them to the side. I then get myself to hyper focus on something different, like correcting a swerving car. If it's going to work I'll only need to force my thoughts for a few minutes, then it'll spiral on something else or leave me be. I've also noticed that I spiral more when I've got a big project to do. Usually the solution when this happens isn't to solve the spiral, it's because I haven't broken down my project into small enough actionable pieces and I'm feeling overwhelmed. A little more planning can really help here.
I think this is true. And it explains why sometimes I dream about things that I have to do, or I forgot during the day, it's my brain trying to make me remember
Thank you! I was just spiraling about only having 2h at home before an appointment, and just realized I was becoming anxious about forgetting the appointment! Just set myself 2 phone alarms and already feeling much better.
Thank you! I was just spiraling about only having 2h at home before an appointment, and just realized I was becoming anxious about forgetting the appointment! Just set myself 2 phone alarms and already feeling much better.
after reading "the artist's way", i started using the "morning pages" whenever i caught myself in any thought spiral. they work as a real nice mental flush and have already helped me with rumination and even insomnia.
I didn't even realize there was a word for my recent explosion of talking to myself and daily, constant internal monologue, rambling, etc. The worst part is the talking to myself -- when I ruminate, I feel the urge to say what I'm thinking out loud, because I get the sense if I can put my thoughts into words, I can derive better/deeper understanding of whatever I'm working through. Only now do I see that what I've been doing this whole time is ruminating! And it's even better to know that there are strategies to control it, because while I do enjoy doing it now and then, it has been getting out of control and causing personal embarrassment when I'm talking to myself in public. 😬
Oh my God! I have struggled with talking outloud like this too. It can make me so embarressed sometimes or feel really trapped when I can't do it. I've definitely got better at not needing to talk so much but it can still be a struggle. I think it's why I really connected with acting when I was younger because like I have been practicing lines and playing out scernarios my whole life basically. It's nice to know that someone else feels this way.
That's why I loved mask mandates so much. I could be talking to myself (just moving my lips behind the mask) in public and no one would know. My cat is also very helpful. If someone else is at home, I pretend I'm talking to it and not myself. 😅
Hello, I’m 36 and am newly diagnosed with adult ADHD. It’s been rough. I’ve been watching your videos and see examples of what I’ve been experiencing for years, but never fully understood. I have trouble with rumination and intrusive, often distorted thoughts. I’m glad to know I’m not the only one that has dealt with this. It’s been great watching these. 👍🏻
Keep in mind a thought spiral isn't always negative, they can be positive too. This may be something specific to me as I experience bipolar but as that's a very common comorbidity of ADHD I suspect I'm not alone. I can feel like my brain gets stuck on loop and fast forward about a new project or something fun that happened. It's still extremely distracting or can interfere with sleep etc, although obviously less distressing, so some people may not recognise it for what it is. I'm definitely going to try that anchoring technique.
Hi! Something important to remember when you're ruminating a bunch - ask yourself - are you hungry?? This is super important for me because rumination and loneliness is way worse if I'm hungry. Getting some yummy healthy food in my body, maybe a comforting soup or hot sandwich, really helps settle down intense anxiety that can cause rumination. 🙂
These videos actually helped me figure out that I have ADHD, speak with a dr. and now im starting treatment for it. Thank you for putting words to things that i was experiencing that i couldn't vocalize on my own. Truly helpful beyond words.
I have ADHD, but also C-PTSD and it’s often difficult to determine where my rumination stems from. I do find it really helpful though to consider what the ‘negative belief about myself’ is regarding the rumination. I find more often than not it really gets to the root of the issue, so I can then actually hear the logic my brain (or therapist) tries to tell me.
@@karengerber8390 Are you me? Most of the time it feels like they synergize for me. One dovetails with the other. Either the incessant need for stimulation of ADHD latches onto whatever my C-PTSD can think of out of the blue to ruminate on that day (usually if my romantic relationship is okay) and it's off to the races. Or, ADHD emotional dysregulation gets me flustered/angry and it just.will.not.go.away because I cannot stop thinking about it...usually because my partner and I did a confrontation and now my C-PTSD is dovetailing with the emotional dysregulation lol. Clonidine has been helping a ton with rumination!
@@fearguyQ No, I am not you. I fail to comprehend why you asked. I appreciate that you shared a medication that works for you. That is marvelous! I hope my self-check list helps someone out there. 12:09 CST ...Iowa.
Thank you so much for including the clips of you actively getting frustrated and starting new thought spirals, and then trying to use the ACE technique to move through/past them. Things like that are what make your videos soo relatable, real, and encouraging for another person (me) who deals with the same issues.
This video has really helped me today. I’ve had a day of multiple failures due to me dropping the ball several times in the past. My usual methods of dealing with this aren’t working so I’m glad I have the distraction of trying out other people’s methods. I agree on changing rooms and moving about even though today that isn’t working.
I really like the choice to include the struggles that would likely be cut from videos on other channels. It's nice to see these kinds of experiences not being hidden away and instead acknowledged.
You know honestly the most helpful thing about this video is just seeing someone else who has put the time into managing their ADHD still have a "bad brain day." I feel so often that I should be accomplish more than I do in a day, and I think we sometimes just need to let ourselves have a bad day. That doesn't mean give up, it just means try your best with maybe lowered expectations and re-examined goals.
This is where I like to see my ADHD as a “gift” rather than curse. Cure to a thought spiral? Distraction! Definitely harder to do if you have comorbidities such as depression and anxiety, but with most thought spirals, I find something mentally active can help. I like doing puzzles (sudoku, crosswords) or reading. TV could work, but I find it too easy to let my mind wander while watching tv
Yes. Quick, creative outlet time! I set a timer for 10 min and try to figure out what I would need to go to Antarctica and bring home and raise 5 penguins. Or something else creative and random. (quietly switches screen back to Antarctica ice, breaker trips. Timer rings.)
I resonate a lot with the reply from Caroline Wong. I've never tried a flow chart, but Parent Mode is 100% something I do. Sometimes when the spiral is due to sadness, I go for a walk and I'll deliberately continue the spiral. It's about a 2-mile walk, and I'm a night walker by nature, so it's quiet out and I can talk myself through it with no distractions. Usually I'll cry a bit. I learned a few self-soothing techniques from someone who has flashbacks, like stroking your arms or singing something soothing aloud or just talking to yourself aloud. My reasoning is that: 1) Walking helps make the thoughts more linear, so even if they're still tracking downward at least I'm making progress. 2) The saddness churns up a lot of emotions. It's like a blister, I need to take care of it or else it's gonna burst under the least bit of pressure at the worst moment. And it's exhausting, but I feel better allowing myself that bit of time to feel. 3) Sad thoughts tend to stick around longer. Talking through it can help me to organize the thoughts and consider perspectives. I dunno how else to describe it, it's like giving me permission to unmask with myself.
Ohhh yes if you're struggling with rumination, I would consider reading the book Brain Lock. It is about OCD, but heavy rumination is a huge part of OCD. My therapist actually diagnosed me with OCD, before realizing it was ADHD, without the hyperactivity. The book was the only thing that helped me.
Interesting. I have ASD and OCD is a part of that criteria. I don't think you can be ASD w/o OCD. I definitely heavily ruminate. My grandma also did it and she and I both were just dx with anxiety. But I'm less anxious than many I noticed...it's very specific triggers. But the rumination is real. I just found out it's very damaging to your brain. I also thought most people did it. Lol But not so much. Telling my husband about it helped me realize this. It was a habit every time I had a new "significant" social interaction out and about for a while after shut downs. Ghosting became a new normal before that and I'd ruminate about why that person ghosted. But that's typical with ASD. Trying to repeatedly fix a puzzle that we don't have all the pieces for. 🙈 Now I have more serious things I've been ruminating about but I've practiced the same "stop drop and roll". Either I can't fix the thing I'm ruminating about at all...or if it's possibly helpful I give myself time later when I'm less stressed and can more easily make that boundary. I tell myself to STOP (easier after finding out how damaging it is to your brain), DROP that idea (into a mental box for later), and ROLL with another activity.
Hi Lauren, any chance you could share your experience with the similarities between OCD and ADHD, or if you have any resources on it instead? I was diagnosed with OCD, but recently I've been resonating with a lot of ADHD experiences and am wondering if it's a comorbidity, or if they're just similar in a lot of aspects. I'm glad you got the diagnosis you needed in the end!
@@heartofthechords2082 Might look at this. It's a talk presented by ADDitude Magazine about OCD and ADHD and the differences/similarities. ruclips.net/video/-wnJeN0HIGE/видео.html
@@heartofthechords2082 so the reason for the diagnoses of OCD at the beginning is because of the rumination, and I was actually doing compulsive activities in terms of excessive organization in very specific areas of my home. However, I think this is more of a "tendency" for me, as I am generally not very organizer, am jumping from project, and generally just pretty scattered in my speech. I tend to forget words, start a sentence in my head before actually speaking (if that makes sense), etc. Also, something I found interest is my therapist says its very uncommon to have an OCD/ADHD comorbidity, however I do question it as well! I would suggest reading the Brain Lock book (OCD), and the book Driven to Distraction (ADHD), they both give many examples of people struggling with these diagnosis's, and how different it shows in different people and the steps to help yourself (medicated, or not!).
@@laurenalise3488It is very uncommon to have an OCD and ADHD diagnosis… I have OCD and I have classic symptoms of it. And I also have classic symptoms of ADHD. I think they are often cmorbid but people have such a narrow view of OCD the same way they have a narrow view of ADHD. So, people do compulsions to help manage the obsessions and control the anxiety. The underlying causes are vast. But that’s why OCD is considered a nuerodivergency because it’s most common in people who are nuerodivergence(with symptoms of ADHD, autism, dyslexia, etc). So, it could be a part of a broader issues that leads to tendencies (we’re calling OCD) that manifest differently based on if you’re ADHD, autistic or both. Because both can hyperfocus and have attention to detail. For ADHD, it could be curiosity or wondering. People with ADHD have a lot of thoughts and go down rabbit holes so it’s common they can overthink and hyperfocus on negative outcomes. For autism, the desire to control the thought, the environment or outcomes can be prominent. So, they engage in routines to ensure this or to prevent an unwanted outcome. Like ADHD, they can hyperfocus on the negative. Also, both ADHD and autism have a tendency towards rigid thinking. Which is great for OCD. So, the natural tendencies of these disorders seem to lead to OCD tendencies even if they don’t reach the full criteria. Both hyperfocus, have rigid thinking, want to control the environment/outcomes, one may have a tendency to overthink leading to lack of certainty while one wants to ensure that certainty. And for many people, it’s a common of both.
pardon me while I watch every video on your channel and have a little cry 😂 I'm 29 and just recently diagnosed with ADHD and it basically ruined my life in a lot of ways. I barely squeaked by and managed to graduate college based purely on the mercy of professors who allowed me to retake failed tests and submit papers months late (and in one case, over a YEAR late). it's absolutely insane to me that I didn't get diagnosed earlier, but I'm trying to move forward in my life with the knowledge that I have the capability to change my life for the better now that I'm medicated and receiving therapy and treatment for my ADHD. your videos have also been wonderful and so helpful for me. thank you for doing what you do, it's deeply appreciated ❤️
Not on topic but I just want to thank you Jessica for all the content you have provided to the ADHD community. I have recently been diagnosed as having ADHD. It never occurred to me that I may have this problem, when I was a child it was considered a ‘boy problem’. I only started thinking about it last year when my daughter said she thought I may be ADHD, she had been investigating it for a friend. I, of course, dismissed this as total nonsense but then my hyper focus superskill took over and began investigating it, which is when I found you! The penny slowly began to drop, and I felt so sad for my lost opportunities and failure to reach my potential. Then I thought what can i do about it now? Definitely still need help with impulse control and paying attention, not to mention housecleaning, which completely fell apart during the lockdowns. So I called my GP and was given a referral to mental health services. About a month or so ago my diagnosis was confirmed and yesterday I started my medication. It’s taken 65 years but perhaps now I can function in what is considered a normal way!
Can I just say thank you for this channel. I'm recently diagnosed (at 52!) and so much of my behaviour that had frustrated me now makes sense. The fact that there are all of you here has instantly made me feel less of a weirdo but the amazing ideas and strategies are genuinely helpful. Much appreciation 👏
I was diagnosed earlier this year and I'm constantly annoyed by how much of neurodiverse education is geared towards children or teens. I'm in my 30's with different problems than a 9 year old at school. I appreciate this channel so much because it seems written for the demographic I belong to 🌞🌻🤘🏻
Inner child work has honestly been the most helpful for me, so it's good to hear you're working on it! c: I find it hard to help myself, esp when I'm in a negative spiral, but when I remember I'm neglecting the needs of my past self I can't do that to them. They're just a kid who heard these thoughts so many times from awful people, and I'm not gunna be another bully in that line. It really helps me stay motivated to handle spirals in a healthy way, even when I don't feel I "deserve it".
The timing of this video is amazing I've been dealing with some medical issues and I didn't even realize what I was experiencing was ruminating it's been almost a week straight of spiraling thoughts.
Something that helps me that I saw on Pinterest is saying true things like, "This apple is red," and then something you want to be true like, "I'm going to be okay." Idk why it helps, but it made me feel a lot better. You can do a bunch. "It's raining and I'm okay." This is a phone, and I'm going to do well on the test." It helps if you say them out loud. I haven't been diagnosed with ADHD, but these videos are super helpful for me and I'm going to talk to my doctor about it soon.
I think its also important to say that anxiety can sometimes trick you into thinking that that spiraling and negative talk is a permanent state. So having a list of things to do to change focus, and even taping it to the wall next to you is a good thing to remind you that in fact you can, and will, snap out of it.
You getting frustrated about the RUclips task you were trying to do and using that new technique in real time was so relatable I almost wanted to cry. Thank you for keeping that in to show us we’re not alone ❤️
I had a CBT coach who said I should try to project my "astral self" outside my body, stand behind me and put my hands on my shoulders. I imagine my outside self consoling my body, while thinking of the most beautiful, peaceful place I've ever been (my mothers house in the mountains of Ireland helps). It's the most effective solution to self-destructive, addictive thoughts that I've experienced. Recently I've been trying to be kind to myself and not beat myself up over uncontrollable rumination because I often curse my mind for constantly finding my thoughts on unhelpful and damaging monologues in my mind..it's a work in progress :)
This was a horrendous problem in the past for me. It is so much better than it was, although I can still "go there." Here's what has helped me most consistently: Nature walks, meditation, getting engaged in a project or activity, physical activity that breaks a sweat. I know everybody is different. Your videos are unfailingly well researched. I like how your expert recommended connecting with your body and engaging in what you're doing. That rings true. Thank you for helping all of us. We all struggle and knowing we face some of the same struggles makes me feel less alone. I'm sure this is true for others, as well.
This was me literally yesterday 😭😂🤣 it's worse before my PMS. It was negative but I literally just wrote in journal every thing that came into my mind to let it out and it helped but this is great information. Thank you fellow brains 🧠
Me too! I find writing out ALLLLL of my worst fears about whatever I'm ruminating on helps me so much. I might be upset/hurting as I'm starting out, but every time resolution and insight and peace comes to me.
I have also noticed there are certain topics that I ruminate on at times. If I feel the pattern repeating I can ‘zoom out’ of that thought to see the bigger pattern at play. It doesn’t stop it but it helps me to know that soon it will be over and I can detach from it while it is here.
I ruminate in negative self talk so I often ask myself "what would your best friend or your mom have to say about that?" It really helps put things in perspective and Douses the flames that can burn out of control when ruminating
What seems to help me depends on the type of rumniation, but one thing almost always helps: imagining my negative thoughts and bad memories as RUclips videos on my home screen and choosing not to watch them....mentally clicking "do not recommend channel" and using my brain's search bar to search for fun and positive memories...or if I'm overthinking a situation, I write down what it is, to what extent I can control it, and some action steps I can take...it helps to externalize worry and to put it into perspective. Many people say you have to drop down into your body but it doesn't work for me usually...I find more cognitive techniques are useful to me.
A question like this is hard to answer because it depends on what's causing the rumination. The rumination will continue until the thing causing it is handled, or you find another coping mechanism for it. If you can find out what it is and do something about it, that is always the best option. However, if you don't know what it is or can't do anything about the source, distraction usually helps until you find a better coping mechanism. Source - first-hand experience, so take with a grain of salt.
I can't tell you how helpful and validating it is to see another person, especially someone I like and admire, having a bad brain day! Thank you for being so open!
In my old office before I relocated, I had a second table. It was for meeting with employees, but I found that if I just moved myself to that table and worked from there, facing a different direction in my office, it would stop the spin and I could focus. It's like I broke that cycle. It also worked on the really bad "squirrel" days. We also had a walking track and sometimes I'd go there, similar to Pete's advice, just to get moving. My new work location doesn't have either of these options and might explain why I'm struggling more. (back to watching, I wasn't done but I'd forget my thought if I waited)
Really appreciate you showing your real-time struggles in this one! I know it's not nice in the moment, but it's so validating seeing others experience and work through similar negative thought spirals - helps me gain some perspective on when I'm in a similar state. Recently I've been struggling with my thoughts becoming hyperfixated on one subject, and the subsequent frustration I feel over not being able to focus on something else I actually want to be doing. I've hardly got any work done today because my mind has been SO fixated on this one area of interest and keeps going back to it, even though I don't even care that much for it and don't think it'll add value to my life. I end up wasting time on these random hyperfixations and feeling bad about myself, and really need to learn to detach from those thoughts and re-anchor and re-engage in what I actually want to be doing.
Thank you for this. a doctor recent told me I probably don't have ADHD and it's more likely anxiety. One of many things I've been thinking in circles about, he's very wrong. I'm a big fan of taking emotion walks to help me figure it out. sometimes it's like walking beside the demon. Sometimes it's like the demon is standing in front of you every step, but it helps! Either to sort of work through what I'm constantly thinking about or to redirect my thoughts so now Instead of thinking about whatever the thing is, I'm thinking about how pretty it is outside
Ha! As if diagnoses stopped at just one thing! How nice would that be? "Ope, can't have ADHD anymore because you've got anxiety now." Sounds like you're struggling with both. Hope treatment is helping.
@@tinkeramma. Wow how convenient that would be! I'm seeing a different doctor soon, fingers crossed this one will understand you can have more than one issue
Thank you for this video! Have tried to free myself from rumination about an event that happened a week ago. Comment at @9:25 helped me a long. Sending thanks to the poster as well, Sharron Roe!
my favorite method for stopping rumination in its early stages is literally to tell my brain "Hey! Drop It" like when you want a dog to stop holding something in their mouth. works like a charm
Getting lost in the spiral especially when I have more important things to do is one of my daily problems. This episode gave me a lot of ideas to deal with that. Thanks a lot! And to think that it was just based on the responses of the community and not a fully researched topic reminded me once again that I'm not alone in this and there are so many people who could relate and give effective advice. I'm so glad to have found this community.
Reminders are key to my mental health and productivity at 69-years-old. I can help a grandson and his parents through ADHD by referring to you. Thanks!
You're welcome!! Thank you so much for such a sweet comment and for supporting what we do! And we're honoured that you find our content good enough to share with family who might be struggling. 🧡
I put myself in a verbal feedback loop. Usually “grace is ok” or if i get into a thought spiral cause a plan or something has changed, ill verbally go through my schedule and reassure myself its ok and the change isnt a big deal.
Literally felt that in my SOUL when you said you suddenly thought "Im not a real RUclipsr" because you werent able to do what you were trying to fast enough That kind of stuff throws me so off and everything comes to a screeching hault. I totally get wanting to cry. I hate it for you but Im glad Im not alone.I know its incorrect logically which makes me feel worse. So thankful for you sharing.
I also found it so interesting when you spoke about the creative thought process can also be creative and making up scenarios. I went to art as an escape and found myself spiraling into anger I never associated that creative thinking maybe the opposite of what I need to do if I'm spiraling. Thank you for sharing I think that if I am going to do something creative it needs to be more structured where I have a start a middle and an ending This could be a healthier way for me to do this. As always you are amazing help to the community and thank you everyone else here that is supporting each other and so thankful to be a part of this community.
I have ADHD myself & it has helped me to identify my reactions to certain triggers.. I have extensive responses to things I think are not in alignment with my values! What is triggering you to cause the rhumination? Fix that…root cause Or a situation that we feel we could have handled better-boundaries & communication of wants/needs
wow this popped up at the PERFECT time! been kinda stuck in a ruminative cycle which has been burning me out even more using up all the energy that could be used for other purposes, THANK YOU!!! edit : my best analogy would be an endless treadmill of thoughts lol
Another video with incredible advice and seriously relatable content. Ruminating is something I struggle with the worst so I was very excited to see this pop up. Your videos have done so much to help me. I'd known there was wonky stuff going on with my brain for a long time, but stumbling across your content was a game changer. Suddenly so many things in my life, so many things my brain does made sense for the very first time. Now, at 37, I'm finally going to get evaluated for ADHD, among other things. You are an amazing human, thank you so much for everything you do.
This whole thing reminds me so much of “turtles all the way out” by John Green which is a book on ocd. I haven’t found a way to stop ruminating yet and that’s why I think this video will come in handy, but I guess what kind of works for me is listening to loud music, going for a run and writing what’s on my mind at that exact moment on paper. Hope this helps and absolutely love your videos.
I was just trying to explain this concept to someone and they were not understanding. It’s so nice to know I’m not alone!! It especially happens when I’m going through something stressful or repetitive, usually in a new situation or responsibility. Thank you for this!
I figure my thoughts are there for a reason and I’d best acknowledge them properly to let them go or they’ll crop back up no matter what. Putting them down in dot point form usually helps. Sometimes that means texting a person to apologise and explain myself whilst letting them know I love and value them. Depends what you’re ruminating on at the end of the day.
I am disabled and stuck in a nursing home right now. I get stuck in thoughts about what I might have done to avoid the current mess or if my plans to leave will ever come to fruition etc. I find it useful to remind myself I don't have a time machine and can't effect the past or even the future. And then I go on RUclips and watch your videos. Thank you for them!
Thank you for not cutting out your frustration and anchoring and spiraling. Also, you're 100% a real youtuber, and that by no means means that you have to be the expert at everything youtube, that is what your team is for after all :D
I have the demon she is always active. So I let myself finish the scenario but then will say, "Nay" and will shake my head and moving on. Those scenarios can keep spiraling and I know they are the past bugging me and then I will go into my RPGing mode and go character mode and it knocks me to a scenario that I can play out online but then when it's done then I can move on. Your channel has been a light for me. I have ADHD the combined type that includes hyperactivity. With anxiety and depression and autism my brain doesn't always want to shut off and it's hard so your channel speaks to me in a way that says I am not alone. My husband will watch your channel because then feels that he knows me better and has a greater understanding for some of the demons that lurk. I am forever grateful to your channel.
Your an amazing girl who's helps me keep my head.ive been diagnosed with ADHD as a child and stopped the meds at 16 and and now at 40 because I asked for them back it's a nightmare.10 week I've been waiting for a doctor and still nothing.top girl and respect for doing the videos xx
I'm going through the same thing now at 34! Was on the medication in my early 20's, got off of them because I felt like they weren't right for me at the time, moved to a different state, and now it's like I'm having to get diagnosed all over again there have been so many hoops to jump through!
This is an issue with the entire mental health industry. It even affects physical conditions. It boils down to; they don't trust anyone other themselves to make a diagnosis, so any previous diagnosis is ignored as if it never existed. To make it worse, the laws on what qualifies as a diagnosis is actually different state to state meaning you can get a valid diagnosis in one state then move to a state where you are no longer able to get a diagnosis due to the law not your medical condition.
Ugh, I feel this. Went 6 months with an ADHD center, and they keep analyzing me forever. I switched doctors twice after that and finally found a RNP who specializes in psychiatric illnesses - put me on meds immediately, helped me keep my job - I still have other issues but don't keep waiting, unless you have no choice - you've got this!
2 things for me: social interaction & working out Something about the satisfaction of a good conversation with a stranger or loved one combined with a positive workout changes my day completely. I should take my own advice haha
I've often had issues with rumination/thought spirals as well. Indeed, thinking your way out of it typically doesn't work. One of the things that works quite well for me is using the Wim Hof breathing method. Look it up on youtube, there's this guided video where you breathe deep in and out for 30 times and then hold your breath (for a couple of minutes, it's crazy how long you're able to do this). You do this 3 times in a row. Whenever my brain is overflowing with thoughts, doing this seems to 'reset' my brain as it just pushes you out of the thoughts you're having (and breathing exercises are great to calm down anxiety too!). Another great trick (although it isn't really fun) is taking an ice cold shower. Just start with a nice regular warm shower, then put your hand on the temperature controller and in one quick movement push it to the coldest setting and then just take it. Doesn't need to be long, just 30 seconds is enough. Your brain will go into full fight or flight mode, and at that point it's almost impossible to continue ruminating. Your brain is just overwhelmed by the cold feeling and you'll come out of the shower feeling fully 'reset' and whatever you were ruminating about feels like a distant thing. These two tricks work the best for me, so give it a try and see if it helps :)
I turn on music, and turn up the volume to a level where it almost hurts.... and then slowly turning downm and just enjoy the music when its at a good level again. It sort of resets my mindset and the enjoy it
Sometimes I'll completely stop what I'm doing and cuddle my dog. It's a good way to reset my mind when I'm stuck on certain thoughts. Sometimes it's hard to unglue myself, but once I recognize that I'm ruminating, I have to physically change what I'm doing in that moment as if the bloodflow from moving cleanses my motivations. A lot of introspection required.
To stay on a task I distract my brain by listening to a podcast while I am doing that task. I'm an artist and listening to a podcast while I'm drawing helps to keep me focused. Even my husband watching tv in the background helps because it keeps my thoughts from wondering. I also have an extreme difficulty if someone is talking to me understanding and following the conversation. My body actually learned how to stay focused to the conversation by fidgeting. I bounce my leg or move my arms while they are talking. In school I would doodle and it actually helped me follow along because it keeps that part of my brain that likes to wonder busy I guess. Lol Thank you again for these videos. I never knew how much ADHD effects my body as well as my mind and your channel really helps me to understand and helps explain it to my mom who doesn't really get it either. So truly from the bottom of my heart thank you. I'm 36 and I only learned about a year ago that I have ADHD. I've always been diagnosed with anxiety, and depression and yes those do come with ADHD but it's the ADHD that causes a lot of it. So finally getting the treatment I need, I am finally coming to know myself and that is something because honestly I never really cared about myself. I didn't even know my own sense of style and who I am as a person. You have helped me figure that out and that means the world to me.
Oh yes suffered this a lot over the years. It rarely happens now, to the point it shocks me when it does. I recommend a base of Growth Mindset, learn it until it takes no effort. Then for people generally lost in life and not too overly-sensitive with major issues to deal with, Mark Manson. If people have life issues to deal with that might qualify as Psychiatric / Psychological issues, I recommend Uncommon Knowledge UK on RUclips. The video on Inferiority Complex is very good and helped me absolutely burst my own after two or three watches. I will never be the most physically attractive, wealthy, athletic or intelligent. Those types of people are extreme outliers. What I can do, is be my best self, a journey of constant self-improvement, and not *care* that I'm not the most handsome, rich, fastest or brainiest. This then ironically, sets me up to be more attractive, confident, healthier, and try harder to learn!
I have had doctors try to convince me this symptom was so many other things. Not one specialist I've seen over the years, and there's been a lot of them, ever told me about rumination or even the emotional side of ADHD. I've been fighting through this thinking I was just really messed up or had a bad attitude. I lived my entire life not knowing about so much of this being the same core issue I could actually do something about in my head. I never knew, and it made life so much harder. I spent the last few years crying through 2 hour long proctored exams trying so hard to keep it together and managing to pass through sheer willpower and determination. I didn't understand that it wasn't just stress. This changes so much for me, and it leaves an emptiness in my gut knowing how much could have been different. Thank you.
Be Physical: Actual hard labor of any kind. During yesterday’s spiral🌀 I did some hole-digging, dirt-moving and wood-chopping. It got me to refocus on other tasks I wanted to accomplish. The physicality of doing a menial but taxing activity immediately creates different thoughts.🌿
Dr. K gave some great advice: "Your attention follows your perception." If you change your sensory inputs by listening to something else or looking at something else, your attention will follow
Dude, this is really on topic for me right now. Thanks for putting this out I personally try to remove myself from where I'm ruminating, or I hit something very very hard(I currently blacksmith but I've done martial arts), the physical stimulation is helpful to break the line of thought.
My solution to most ADHD problems is "write it down for later." Rumination/thought spirals aren't a problem to cope with, but something to aspire to. Find ways to get the ideas out!
Remember things are harder when you have to perform, so you don't just have to know how to navigate youtube, you have to navigate youtube, look happy, and be entertaining. Edit: I've also been imagining talking to you about doing more research in using technology with people with adhd. I just have a lot of faith in you, your energy and the community you built, so if you're second guessing yourself, think about what you do well and adapt the task to work with that.
I had suspicion I had ADHD, but last week my psychologist told me I had it and it is such a relief, I am not longer "just weird", have been subscibed to your channel for over half a year now, keep up the good work. I love you (not in a romantic sense, just that you are awesome and you helped me a lot even before I knew for sure my diagnosis)
Such a great video! My thought spiral has been very severe lately, this was a well-timed video. For me, Parts work/IFS therapy has been really helpful. Similar to inner child work. Hugely healing.
I recommend the anchor you mentioned. When the person is ruminating, I liken it to your inner child feeling ignored about thier concerns. So they persistently try to engage you. But if you stop, validate the inner voice by taking the time to understand why it is speaking out....put a plan in place to address it in a more appropriate way/time...then find a way to reconnect to the current activity..then the ruminating reduces. I've been doing this for years. As long as you go back and revisit it as promised, the brain rewires over time
Had a breakthrough, the last time I had a nasty thought spiral I recalled all the other thought spirals I had, and that its conclusion was that I could thought spiral myself into permanent damage, I flipped the concept. I could spiral up. The same thought spiral structure can push me into excitement and appreciation. I was also walking when this process shifted.
Weird but somewhat related question: Does anyone else here sometimes notice that they ruminate about good things that happened in the past? It's almost like I'd be mildly addicted to that memory to see if I could squeeze a little more happiness from it.
Yes! I noticed that when I have good thoughts it's even harder for me to fall asleep. Because I don't want to put the effort in to stop them as much. A few weeks ago I was "daydreaming" in bed with positive thought-spirals about what I could do with my life, work wise. Checked my clock around 2 and then 5am. 😅 Only at 5am I really made the effort to fall asleep. Fortunately I did not have to get up early. This was not about the past, but positive thoughts at least. And I do have those positive ruminatings about the past, like a nostalia film loop on repeat.
One of the biggest things for me is to concentrate on breathing. My wife used to complain that I sigh a lot, but it’s usually me just backing off of the thoughts, taking several deep breaths, and concentrating on the breaths only until I am no longer seized up by the anxiety of past mistakes. She has since learned why I do it and understands it.
Watching this while having a thought spiral about how I can’t drive because I get so distracted and freaked out behind the wheel. Hopefully this gets me out of it
This was an episode that I wasn't particularly expecting to connect with, and then hit home like gangbusters. I would love to hear a follow up on this in six months or so -- what worked for you, Jessica, but also what other members of the community picked up and found helpful.
I love that you mentioned the task and default mode network! That’s something a lot of ‘life hacks’ don’t seem to cover. When I’m trying to give advice to friends based on what I learned in therapy, it helps to explain to them the science of what’s happening in the brain instead of just ‘splash your face with water’ which seems useless and cheesy on its own, I say ‘splash your face to activate the swim reflex and your parasympathetic nervous system’ and it clicks better!
As a person with other issues with ADHD , I use Tapping a lot because I believe ruminating is the brain problem solving which for me-is usually emotionally based and so the time it takes to rid the emotion or neutralize it. I-usually get relief and grow as well by retraining my brain. I have many other tools incase that doesn’t work ❤️
I love the new videos. The way you’re including the brain hiccups is so relatable. Sometimes I don’t even know what my brain just did and time goes by without me realizing. I used to freak out and get mad at myself. Now I just tell myself it’s okay and that I am doing my best. My best is great and I am amazing!
Not sure if this is the same kind of rumination, but usually when I keep coming back to something in my head it's because I feel like I'm not properly prepared for something (happening in the future), so I find it really helpful to just go through it in my head so that the next time I think of it I can just shove it away, knowing I've already thought it through.
I honestly come and watch your videos. I don’t know why but no matter what I’m going through Your videos seem to be exactly what I seem to be experiencing at that exact moment in life, Which doesn’t completely remove The ruminating part I have but it definitely helps me rationalize it and not feel alone fucking crazy. My love and appreciation for you is off the charts I sincerely mean that.
My problem with rumination is that I can often easily distract myself from it, but once I go back to the task that started it, the spiral starts again.
Can you please do an episode about how adhd for women, especially during the luteal phase, can affect all of the things that are adhd/emotional regulation/rumination. I know PMDD is very common with adhd women and I would love your take on it.
@@BoysLoveUnrated A phase of menstruation where the egg has dropped but menses hasn't begun. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Luteal_phase Not sure about PMDD myself.
Pmdd is premenstrual dysphoric disorder a severe version of PMT pre menstrual tension. Pmdd can cause suicidality or psychosis. It's really hard to live with I believe it's more common in ADHD / ASD
When I spiral I reach for my "self-soothe bag/box".
I really didn't know what to put in it first, but sensory things are essential:
- Smell - a sunscreen that I wore when I was in my happiest place working with dolphins
- Taste - childhood favourite sweets, Werther's Originals because they remind me of my grandfather
- Touch - favourite stim, which for me are sponges
- Watch - my absolute favourite comedy movie (if I have time), Some Like it Hot
- Listen - Zelda Breath of the Wild soundtrack or some chill hop playlist
- Read - a letter I wrote to myself about how I can achieve anything...
This is brilliant! I love this so much - thank you so much for sharing!! It's sounds like a first aid kit for self-soothing and I can't get enough of it! 🥰🥰
@@HowtoADHD I was SO reluctant at first, I was awash with ablelist thoughts like "you shouldn't need to have that, you are weak to need it" and I really had to tell myself that it is ok, and at the time I really did need to make one for myself as I wasn't coping.
Remember, it takes huge courage to ask for help, even more so to reach within for help when you feel truly alone, like I did at the time I made mine 💙 so proud of myself, and now I cherish it.
Let me go ahead and write this down, thank you!
That's so awesome! Thanks for sharing ✨ I love this.
Play-Doh for both smell and touch
I really like that this video is edited down a lot less. It feels more real and genuinely makes me feel validated to see someone acting like me and going on different tangents and stuff. It's refreshing to see unmasked ADHD
This 100%
Agreed!
Completely agree 💯
@@deepwaters7242 😊
Yes. It gave me feeling of being accepted... Or not alone... Cause I do this
I feel like my anxiety makes it much harder to stop ruminating, to the point that I don't think I ever stop deliberately. It's great to see that other people have found solutions, though!
Don't give up, I bet there is some way that will work for you too and maybe it doesn't stop it for you but just makes it a little better to deal with in the moment 🥰. Sometimes the goal is not 100%. Like I guess 100% is unachievable either way sometimes.
Lamotrigine or whatever your psychologist gives you for ANXIETY that is separate from ADHD. In a pinch I use Benadryl.
I notice that since going on meds for anxiety and depression, my rumination has significantly dropped.
rumination feeds anxiety because your brain is fooling you into believing that thinking about something is productive and so it keeps going, and it's not, so it keeps going. and it that sense it fools you into an addictive cycle that you do not want but your brain thinks it's solving something. but it's not. self compassion helps. and a walk or change of scenery helps. but self compassion, slowing down the thoughts and giving yourself a big hug before a walk can help.
Same. Wanted to share these:
Someone shared a tip in an article for stopping rumination… ask yourself “What is my next thought going to be?” It works really well. Cuts the wire.
Also I had my worst rumination and freakouts first thing in the morning until I learned EMD. Upon ruminating, move your eyes (open or closed) from left to right as far as they’ll go, one end of your peripheral vision to the other, sorta like windshield wipers. It both cuts the thoughts and diffuses the ptsd associated with the thoughts and emotion. There is some science to it.
For me it works 100% of the time. No more terrible mornings. I woke up with panic attacks for 10 years prior to that.
Before that I was using a mantra, saying “Thank you, thank you, thank you” or “ I love you, I love you, I love you.” Up to 100 times if I needed to. The growing gratitude/peace/love declaration would slowly push out the panic/anxiety until it was gone. It worked pretty decently but not as well as EMD and took a lot longer than EMD to get back to good.
I love the "intermediate and advanced" content for ADHD that this channel does. The internet seems like it's stuck in an eternal September with a lot of mental health topics so there endless resources for those in the beginning stages of learning about their divergence. But once you're through that part helpful free resources (and even paid) dry up fast. I also like the idea of asking the community, because once you get to these intermediate/advanced topics, experiences and solutions vary a lot more person to person so monolithic advice and listicles don't work so well, plus they tend to be theorized in an ideal vacuum (ex: "but I have to work some times!"). It's better to get tactics from a bunch of real people.
this!!
Internal September is a great saying did you come up with it?
@@thepinkestpigglet7529 unfortunately no, I can't take credit lol. I ran into the term line a year ago. It's a saying that started way back when the internet was first opening up to the public (1993). The influx of new user was so large that the current user base was totally overwhelmed and from then on there was always more newbie internet users than seasoned ones.
@@fearguyQ Up until 93, the internet was almost exclusively academic, and every September, a new crop of freshman would show up and overrun the Internet. Then they would learn their way around, learn to lurk a bit before posting, and generally get a collective clue. In September of 93, everybody got the internet, and ... You know the rest of the story.
This might be more of a depression/insecure thing, but one of my more potent techniques is what I call "recalibrating" my perspective. When I'm fixated on something negative and can't get my mind off of it I take the time to list off potential positive as well as negatives. Making my perspective on experiences more balanced makes them more boring and harder to fixate on.
I never thought about it this way. Making something be boring to stop fixating is such a good tip
This is something I try to do too (when I remember). If I get carried away with my thoughts about the future, whether they're negative or positive, I try imagining the opposite is equally possible. Then it's easier to remember I can't know the future.
I've noticed that you can't be extremely anxious and extremely depressed at the same time, so when you're extremely depressed use that lack of interest in your own wellbeing to choose actions the anxious side of you would never allow.
Smarty you don’t get it do you? Adhd people get depressed an insecure because they fail while their is nothing wrong with their IQ. They see other people pass them by while having more knowledge, skills, passion but just lack control over their operating system. The number of suicide is huge under ADHD people because of not being able to live up to their full potential. There are a lot of studies done in the US and Canada. ADHD is also over represented in jail houses. ADHD takes people into a down words spiral of years of no controle and under achieving to losing believe in themselfs. So recalibrate on that.
When we ruminate on certain past behaviours or events that bring that feeling of shame or guilt, it is part of our brain reminding us that what we did goes against our values or expectations of others. A reminder of how we are a good person with integrity!
God thanks... I needed the reassurance
thank you!! I need this 😭
little statements like these make everything feel okay in the moment. Makes me feel so not alone and hopeful this too will pass. Regret sucks, but it does mean that we have a conscious
Unless we didn’t do anything “wrong”.. we just said something weird, did something embarrassing or innocent. I like what you mentioned tho- I honestly hadn’t thought of it that way 🧿💜
Yes, and then I'll spiral on analyzing what we consider to be values /correct behavior and where I got those values and why and then into deeper philosophical unsolvable ponderous madness 😂
I struggled so much with this and my doctors kept treating me for anxiety because that's how it presented. Finally one day I put my foot down and asked to be put on ADHD meds and the difference has been incredible. I still have anxiety but the majority of my racing anxious thoughts were just because I couldn't slow my brain down enough to deal with them. So it may seem obvious but medication makes addressing my rumination a million times easier!!!
I am currently struggling with a similar situation. My doctors are unwilling to consider I might have something other than or in addition to anxiety (because I made it to grad school so it couldn’t be adhd! Sigh…), but I highly suspect I have some adhd in the mix.
had a similar experience but my anxiety was less clinical, a lot of my anxiety was about forgetting something that mattered to me or losing track of time
@@erinmcgarvey2187 Gotta see a psychiatrist or psychologist. There are many people with master's degrees who have ADHD.
Suchan important point!
@@erinmcgarvey2187 I'm so sorry! You need better doctors!
After starting meds, I've noticed my thought spirals are just so much less and a lot less severe. I love how quiet my brain is on meds. If only I had been on meds my whole life, I wonder where I would be now? Hm... let's not go down THAT thought spiral haha
that is so relatable!
Yes! Right? If only I was treated effectively growing up, though I'm grateful for the awareness and advances.
Never go down that spiral. I was on meds as a kid but didn’t use or understand them properly until adulthood. I don’t think children should be on stimulates because of this strange idea that with adhd you can’t get high. You can but because that’s not the goal it’s an adverse effect. It’s not enjoyable being loaded at school when you’re not allowed to move about. I got in a lotttttt of trouble
And lots of times I would get in just as much trouble on meds as off because as a kid I was always on way to high a dose. 70 milligram vyvanse as a kid as an adult I’m on 15 mg adderall. I mean cmon now. Cause as an adult I have a say in a treatment that I didn’t have as a kid.
Same here. I would definitely be in a "different space" at this point in my life. I just have to stop beating myself up for something I had no idea about.
Girls when I was a kid didn't have ADHD according to the current place where Mental Health was in relation to what they knew. Still, it stinks. I've dreamt of being neurotypical. causes me to feel sad when I go there... the spiral.
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My friend gave me great advice on this that I somehow always forget to follow: "10 minutes of maintenance beats ten hours of ruminating"
Basically the moment you catch yourself ruminating, find a moment to step aside and set a ten minute timer. You are not allowed to do ANYTHING for those ten minutes except ruminate on your rumination stuff.
Something about having to "actively" ruminate rather than "passively" ruminate makes it... Weird? It feels like shifting gears. Sometimes I get really good insight into how to overcome blocks or even why I'm ruminating on certain things in the first place in those ten minutes alone.
But when I actually have to do the ten minute thing, my brain is like "I don't have time for that!!" and I find ways to convince myself not to do it, so I end up forgetting how helpful it's been in the past haha.
Thanks for putting this topic on the table! I actually had to stop and follow my own advice, so I guess another suggestion would be "how would you encourage someone to confront [problem]? Could you actively demonstrate it?" It makes it way easier to do for some reason??
This sounds great and perfect for my ADHD 'defiant brain' - if I decide to actively ruminate on a thing, my brain is for sure going to resist doing that and will look for something else to engage with.
ohhh darn
is my brain also defiant
AND anxiously renumerating!
nailed
I am brilliant at knowing what 'others' can/should/could do but I am blocked when it comes to me..
I can see with clarity
their situation and in a
r
a
B
B
i
t
Hole with own place in the world
self compassionate
yeah and dyslexia
ruminate.
not re numbering
I do this, but I write out what I am ruminating longhand. I schedule a time for it and when my brain starts ruminating, I tell myself that I am free to do ruminate for 10 minutes at 7pm. It works amazingly well. After the 10 minutes are up, the paper gets put away and I don't have to think about those things until the next day at whatever time I pick.
I think this could be immense helpful. It’s like my brain thinks it’s a problem to solve
One of the things that has been a life changer for me is to verbalize my thoughts. It's really hard to deal with one thing when you also have a million other thoughts going on in your head, but when you say things out loud it kinda isolates them and also makes it very clear, so dealing with problems becomes easy and often times I realize my problems aren't as bad as they sound in my head.
That is the #1 thing that helps me! And I can only do this when I am home alone or I take a drive and talk to myself like a weirdo. I used to make “voice memos” on the phone when driving to explain to myself what the problem is. Interesting to go back a few years and listen to old ones-Podcasts of myself to myself 🤪😵💫?!? Is that a little schizophrenic?
I love this suggestion. Will have to try!
@@ladyauslander6489 sounds very wise.
I do this SO MUCH that I bought some wireless earbuds so I could talk to myself when I was walking my dog and people wouldn't look at me like I was bonkers 🤣
@@ladyauslander6489 I REALLY RELATE to this...I couldn't do without this particular tool!!
I appreciate that you are also showing a bit of the struggles, feelings of overwhelm and negative thoughts you were having in the moment and that someone came over to help you. I'm wondering if you could show more of this aspect of your ADHD life. I know for me seeing someone struggling the same way I do feels validating. I do often get confused with "simple" tasks I've done a million times before. All of a sudden I'm just completely drawing a blank and I don't understand anymore. I get so angry and ashamed of myself for being "stupid" and just randomly start crying because I'm so overwhelmed and panicking because I'm stuck on something that a "normal" person wouldn't be stuck on. I know I'm not alone but I've never seen anyone else do that same thing. Stop in their tracks by confusion/misunderstanding/forgetting, get hit by a dump truck full of overwhelm, self doubt/hate etc, freak out/cry/yell etc.
I think I butchered how I explained this... Hope it makes sense
That absolutely makes sense! You're definitely not alone! 🧡
@@HowtoADHD yay! Success!
i totally understand what you're saying. i do the same thing, and you communicated well💙
Thanks! I often think that I'm failing to communicate clearly and yet most of the time feedback seems to be that I do communicate well... Yet I still feel like I do a hatchet job of it.
I didn’t realize this happened to anyone else. You described it perfectly. I’m relieved to know it’s an adhd thing.
I’d love to see an episode on the grief that comes with a late/adult diagnosis, wondering what life might have been like if it was caught earlier. Love the show, thanks for all you and the team do ❤️
i was 55. how old were you?
my brain is actually stuck on that as well. i live in an area where ive been struggling to get a diagnosed. i was actually diagnosed in another city. but when i came back home i had forgotten the name of the duded and who he was from so i had nothing to go off of. and here people dont believe in it i guess. im a 42 year old chic on ssi bc icant hold a job bc even though i have the motivation for half of what i did, i always had bosses that were never patient enough to work with me. i ended up homeless for 10 years. what sucks is that there r programs designed to help people like me get training and actually help us find employment where we can succeed. but you need the diagnoses to do it. and most of the people there had theirs when they were kids. apparently my father was too proud. the school recommended i get testing. so anyways yeah i totally get it. if we actually had the proper diagnoses then. just think where we could actually be. it sucks that everything is finally beginning to change now. good luck to you
I'm 70...i hope to diagnosed in the next two weeks. I am definitely feeling grief.
@@julianawilson7245 i understand.
Right? Like I could have passed high school if someone had caught on that I needed help earlier on...
I'm a big fan of just physically moving myself to break out of a thought spiral. When I was in college and felt like I was just spinning out, I used go outside to take a lap around the building. At work, I'd sometimes just go to the end of the hall & back. Even just that much movement usually helps me!
I did a course with a charity about sensory processing disorder the Physio said exercise helps with sensory problems .
This is what works best for me too. Changing my physical location always interrupts the spiral for me.
This works for me. I’ll do a few minutes of intensive burpees and squats or anything HIIT just to shake myself up. Feels good.
I got through my worst nights at uni by pulling on a hoodie, putting on some music, and walking around campus for about an hour (I am thankful for the numerous factors that allowed this to be a consistently safe decision)
I started watching your channel because I have a granddaughter who has ADHD and now lives with me. I wanted to understand her better and be a better advocate for her. What I didn’t expect is to learn so much about myself and how to handle it. I too suffer from spiraling circling thoughts, mostly at night. Getting up to watch a movie or boil an egg or go for a jog is not an option at 2am when I have to be up at 5, but reaching for something that smells good or feels good or listening to a favorite song in order to break the cycle of destructive thoughts is totally doable. Thanks!
i felt so validated when she tried the "dropping anchor" and admitted that, while it worked this time, it might not work next time. thanks, jess. that made me feel better and i don't even know why♥️
I didn't love that she struggled, but I REALLY love that she kept the struggles in the video.
I found the dropping anchor bit really, really impressive. As in, she was able to immediately pin down what she was feeling and what she was saying about herself. It would take me a week to get there, in fact that's probably what I'd be ruminating about in the first place!
I really love your profile name. I just looked up Psalm 91 and it was so encouraging. I think I will type it up and post it on my closet door!
@@sweetfreeze5528 oh, thanks! I'm glad it encouraged you♥️
I actually had no idea that my rumination is a symptom of my ADHD, but it makes a ton of sense. Your videos are so healing- thank you so much for all your are doing.
Awesome content, Jessica. Scheduling breaks helps a lot, and is crucial when working from home. I try to use the last 10 minutes of every hour to reset, with at least one mid-day aerobic activity. Without this routine, I am much more prone to rumination. Reframes like "Would I punish anyone else the way I'm punishing myself?" help me to overcome self-judgemental rumination as well.
That reframe has been so crucial to my self care journey! Knowing that I wouldn't treat other the way I'm treating myself helps me to not push myself to to try to please others when it will negatively affect me. If I wouldn't be mad at a friend for not being up to a get together than why should I be mad at myself? And if the other person is mad at me, especially if they know that I deal with anxiety, then maybe they're not the type of person I should spend time with.
It's so validating and comforting to see you so raw and exposed in your authentic self... even as an "expert" when it comes to ADHD. When I have bad days, I always wonder what I'm doing wrong today, why I can't get out right? Even when I'm medicated. Thanks for normalizing this struggle, and showing us, and others, that is OK, and sometimes it just happens 🤗
Hear hear. Absolutely "even when I'm medicated."
So much worse off the meds. Do you have the same issue as me, of sharing you’re spiraling thoughts? That’s my biggest issue.. I feel like as an adult it makes me seem childish. Cause in the moment with high emotions I would say I really believe what I’m saying in that moment. But even minutes later sometimes I’ll realize I was just talking crazy then I get really embarrassed.
I get gaslit a lot a work and that really makes me spiral and sometimes even just think everyone is against me and I’ll just try not to talk to anyone until my head evens out again. But It happens constantly which then sets me on another spiral and then when I’m working a lot of ot then not getting any sleep because Im stuck overthinking.. gosh that’s when it gets bad. When i work 70 hours in a week and only get like 18 hours of sleep.. god I get crazy. Adderall on no sleep will get you paranoid to.
I've heard somewhere that our brains will spiral on problems it's afraid of forgetting. Basically, our subconscious is recognizing a problem and keeping it in active memory so it can be resolved. So the best way to put down thoughts is to confront them, like writing it down or setting a time frame for when you'll deal with something. It just needs to be some way of validating your brain's concerns so it can move on. It doesn't always help depending on the type of spiral, but it does often help me.
Another trick I use is to imagine the thoughts as something physical, then mentally put them to the side. I then get myself to hyper focus on something different, like correcting a swerving car. If it's going to work I'll only need to force my thoughts for a few minutes, then it'll spiral on something else or leave me be.
I've also noticed that I spiral more when I've got a big project to do. Usually the solution when this happens isn't to solve the spiral, it's because I haven't broken down my project into small enough actionable pieces and I'm feeling overwhelmed. A little more planning can really help here.
Yes: either to „put away“ the thoughts or to see them like a place, like a room (e.g.: in my mind) I can „step out of“!
I think this is true. And it explains why sometimes I dream about things that I have to do, or I forgot during the day, it's my brain trying to make me remember
Thank you! I was just spiraling about only having 2h at home before an appointment, and just realized I was becoming anxious about forgetting the appointment! Just set myself 2 phone alarms and already feeling much better.
Thank you! I was just spiraling about only having 2h at home before an appointment, and just realized I was becoming anxious about forgetting the appointment! Just set myself 2 phone alarms and already feeling much better.
after reading "the artist's way", i started using the "morning pages" whenever i caught myself in any thought spiral. they work as a real nice mental flush and have already helped me with rumination and even insomnia.
I didn't even realize there was a word for my recent explosion of talking to myself and daily, constant internal monologue, rambling, etc. The worst part is the talking to myself -- when I ruminate, I feel the urge to say what I'm thinking out loud, because I get the sense if I can put my thoughts into words, I can derive better/deeper understanding of whatever I'm working through. Only now do I see that what I've been doing this whole time is ruminating! And it's even better to know that there are strategies to control it, because while I do enjoy doing it now and then, it has been getting out of control and causing personal embarrassment when I'm talking to myself in public. 😬
Oh my God! I have struggled with talking outloud like this too. It can make me so embarressed sometimes or feel really trapped when I can't do it. I've definitely got better at not needing to talk so much but it can still be a struggle. I think it's why I really connected with acting when I was younger because like I have been practicing lines and playing out scernarios my whole life basically. It's nice to know that someone else feels this way.
That's why I loved mask mandates so much. I could be talking to myself (just moving my lips behind the mask) in public and no one would know. My cat is also very helpful. If someone else is at home, I pretend I'm talking to it and not myself. 😅
Hello, I’m 36 and am newly diagnosed with adult ADHD. It’s been rough. I’ve been watching your videos and see examples of what I’ve been experiencing for years, but never fully understood. I have trouble with rumination and intrusive, often distorted thoughts. I’m glad to know I’m not the only one that has dealt with this. It’s been great watching these. 👍🏻
I love the community engagement in this video. It's helpful to be reminded that we are all struggling together.
Keep in mind a thought spiral isn't always negative, they can be positive too. This may be something specific to me as I experience bipolar but as that's a very common comorbidity of ADHD I suspect I'm not alone. I can feel like my brain gets stuck on loop and fast forward about a new project or something fun that happened. It's still extremely distracting or can interfere with sleep etc, although obviously less distressing, so some people may not recognise it for what it is. I'm definitely going to try that anchoring technique.
Hi! Something important to remember when you're ruminating a bunch - ask yourself - are you hungry?? This is super important for me because rumination and loneliness is way worse if I'm hungry. Getting some yummy healthy food in my body, maybe a comforting soup or hot sandwich, really helps settle down intense anxiety that can cause rumination. 🙂
Totally. For me it's thirst. Water.
Yep, for me it can often be fatigue that I haven’t realised. It may also be under stimulation with a task; or overwhelm at planning a task.
Yup
HALTS
Hungry
Angry
Lonely
Tired
Sick
Old 12 stepper here.
For some reason eating an orange helps me.
thank you for the reminder!!
These videos actually helped me figure out that I have ADHD, speak with a dr. and now im starting treatment for it. Thank you for putting words to things that i was experiencing that i couldn't vocalize on my own. Truly helpful beyond words.
I have ADHD, but also C-PTSD and it’s often difficult to determine where my rumination stems from. I do find it really helpful though to consider what the ‘negative belief about myself’ is regarding the rumination. I find more often than not it really gets to the root of the issue, so I can then actually hear the logic my brain (or therapist) tries to tell me.
Thank you. This is very helpful.
@@karengerber8390 Are you me?
Most of the time it feels like they synergize for me. One dovetails with the other. Either the incessant need for stimulation of ADHD latches onto whatever my C-PTSD can think of out of the blue to ruminate on that day (usually if my romantic relationship is okay) and it's off to the races. Or, ADHD emotional dysregulation gets me flustered/angry and it just.will.not.go.away because I cannot stop thinking about it...usually because my partner and I did a confrontation and now my C-PTSD is dovetailing with the emotional dysregulation lol.
Clonidine has been helping a ton with rumination!
@@fearguyQ
No, I am not you. I fail to comprehend why you asked.
I appreciate that you shared a medication that works for you. That is marvelous!
I hope my self-check list helps someone out there.
12:09 CST ...Iowa.
Thank you so much for including the clips of you actively getting frustrated and starting new thought spirals, and then trying to use the ACE technique to move through/past them. Things like that are what make your videos soo relatable, real, and encouraging for another person (me) who deals with the same issues.
This is exactly what I needed. Been looking up videos on this because I'm self aware enough that it's bad.
Thank you
Hope it helps! 🧡
This video has really helped me today. I’ve had a day of multiple failures due to me dropping the ball several times in the past. My usual methods of dealing with this aren’t working so I’m glad I have the distraction of trying out other people’s methods.
I agree on changing rooms and moving about even though today that isn’t working.
I really like the choice to include the struggles that would likely be cut from videos on other channels. It's nice to see these kinds of experiences not being hidden away and instead acknowledged.
You know honestly the most helpful thing about this video is just seeing someone else who has put the time into managing their ADHD still have a "bad brain day." I feel so often that I should be accomplish more than I do in a day, and I think we sometimes just need to let ourselves have a bad day. That doesn't mean give up, it just means try your best with maybe lowered expectations and re-examined goals.
This is where I like to see my ADHD as a “gift” rather than curse. Cure to a thought spiral? Distraction! Definitely harder to do if you have comorbidities such as depression and anxiety, but with most thought spirals, I find something mentally active can help. I like doing puzzles (sudoku, crosswords) or reading. TV could work, but I find it too easy to let my mind wander while watching tv
Yes. Quick, creative outlet time! I set a timer for 10 min and try to figure out what I would need to go to Antarctica and bring home and raise 5 penguins. Or something else creative and random. (quietly switches screen back to Antarctica ice, breaker trips. Timer rings.)
@@bl8388 I love this!!!
Adhd is God’s gift to genius and creativity. I thank god I have adhd
I resonate a lot with the reply from Caroline Wong. I've never tried a flow chart, but Parent Mode is 100% something I do.
Sometimes when the spiral is due to sadness, I go for a walk and I'll deliberately continue the spiral. It's about a 2-mile walk, and I'm a night walker by nature, so it's quiet out and I can talk myself through it with no distractions. Usually I'll cry a bit. I learned a few self-soothing techniques from someone who has flashbacks, like stroking your arms or singing something soothing aloud or just talking to yourself aloud. My reasoning is that:
1) Walking helps make the thoughts more linear, so even if they're still tracking downward at least I'm making progress.
2) The saddness churns up a lot of emotions. It's like a blister, I need to take care of it or else it's gonna burst under the least bit of pressure at the worst moment. And it's exhausting, but I feel better allowing myself that bit of time to feel.
3) Sad thoughts tend to stick around longer. Talking through it can help me to organize the thoughts and consider perspectives. I dunno how else to describe it, it's like giving me permission to unmask with myself.
Ohhh yes if you're struggling with rumination, I would consider reading the book Brain Lock. It is about OCD, but heavy rumination is a huge part of OCD. My therapist actually diagnosed me with OCD, before realizing it was ADHD, without the hyperactivity. The book was the only thing that helped me.
Interesting. I have ASD and OCD is a part of that criteria. I don't think you can be ASD w/o OCD. I definitely heavily ruminate. My grandma also did it and she and I both were just dx with anxiety. But I'm less anxious than many I noticed...it's very specific triggers.
But the rumination is real. I just found out it's very damaging to your brain. I also thought most people did it. Lol But not so much. Telling my husband about it helped me realize this. It was a habit every time I had a new "significant" social interaction out and about for a while after shut downs. Ghosting became a new normal before that and I'd ruminate about why that person ghosted. But that's typical with ASD. Trying to repeatedly fix a puzzle that we don't have all the pieces for. 🙈
Now I have more serious things I've been ruminating about but I've practiced the same "stop drop and roll". Either I can't fix the thing I'm ruminating about at all...or if it's possibly helpful I give myself time later when I'm less stressed and can more easily make that boundary. I tell myself to STOP (easier after finding out how damaging it is to your brain), DROP that idea (into a mental box for later), and ROLL with another activity.
Hi Lauren, any chance you could share your experience with the similarities between OCD and ADHD, or if you have any resources on it instead? I was diagnosed with OCD, but recently I've been resonating with a lot of ADHD experiences and am wondering if it's a comorbidity, or if they're just similar in a lot of aspects.
I'm glad you got the diagnosis you needed in the end!
@@heartofthechords2082 Might look at this. It's a talk presented by ADDitude Magazine about OCD and ADHD and the differences/similarities.
ruclips.net/video/-wnJeN0HIGE/видео.html
@@heartofthechords2082 so the reason for the diagnoses of OCD at the beginning is because of the rumination, and I was actually doing compulsive activities in terms of excessive organization in very specific areas of my home. However, I think this is more of a "tendency" for me, as I am generally not very organizer, am jumping from project, and generally just pretty scattered in my speech. I tend to forget words, start a sentence in my head before actually speaking (if that makes sense), etc. Also, something I found interest is my therapist says its very uncommon to have an OCD/ADHD comorbidity, however I do question it as well! I would suggest reading the Brain Lock book (OCD), and the book Driven to Distraction (ADHD), they both give many examples of people struggling with these diagnosis's, and how different it shows in different people and the steps to help yourself (medicated, or not!).
@@laurenalise3488It is very uncommon to have an OCD and ADHD diagnosis… I have OCD and I have classic symptoms of it. And I also have classic symptoms of ADHD. I think they are often cmorbid but people have such a narrow view of OCD the same way they have a narrow view of ADHD. So, people do compulsions to help manage the obsessions and control the anxiety. The underlying causes are vast. But that’s why OCD is considered a nuerodivergency because it’s most common in people who are nuerodivergence(with symptoms of ADHD, autism, dyslexia, etc). So, it could be a part of a broader issues that leads to tendencies (we’re calling OCD) that manifest differently based on if you’re ADHD, autistic or both. Because both can hyperfocus and have attention to detail. For ADHD, it could be curiosity or wondering. People with ADHD have a lot of thoughts and go down rabbit holes so it’s common they can overthink and hyperfocus on negative outcomes.
For autism, the desire to control the thought, the environment or outcomes can be prominent. So, they engage in routines to ensure this or to prevent an unwanted outcome. Like ADHD, they can hyperfocus on the negative.
Also, both ADHD and autism have a tendency towards rigid thinking. Which is great for OCD. So, the natural tendencies of these disorders seem to lead to OCD tendencies even if they don’t reach the full criteria. Both hyperfocus, have rigid thinking, want to control the environment/outcomes, one may have a tendency to overthink leading to lack of certainty while one wants to ensure that certainty. And for many people, it’s a common of both.
pardon me while I watch every video on your channel and have a little cry 😂 I'm 29 and just recently diagnosed with ADHD and it basically ruined my life in a lot of ways. I barely squeaked by and managed to graduate college based purely on the mercy of professors who allowed me to retake failed tests and submit papers months late (and in one case, over a YEAR late). it's absolutely insane to me that I didn't get diagnosed earlier, but I'm trying to move forward in my life with the knowledge that I have the capability to change my life for the better now that I'm medicated and receiving therapy and treatment for my ADHD. your videos have also been wonderful and so helpful for me. thank you for doing what you do, it's deeply appreciated ❤️
Super helpful for my ADHD/OCD/trauma brain. I'm really glad you posted this. Lots of great ideas for my non-stop mind.
Not on topic but I just want to thank you Jessica for all the content you have provided to the ADHD community. I have recently been diagnosed as having ADHD. It never occurred to me that I may have this problem, when I was a child it was considered a ‘boy problem’. I only started thinking about it last year when my daughter said she thought I may be ADHD, she had been investigating it for a friend. I, of course, dismissed this as total nonsense but then my hyper focus superskill took over and began investigating it, which is when I found you! The penny slowly began to drop, and I felt so sad for my lost opportunities and failure to reach my potential. Then I thought what can i do about it now? Definitely still need help with impulse control and paying attention, not to mention housecleaning, which completely fell apart during the lockdowns. So I called my GP and was given a referral to mental health services. About a month or so ago my diagnosis was confirmed and yesterday I started my medication. It’s taken 65 years but perhaps now I can function in what is considered a normal way!
same boat here. knowing is empowering. good luck
Can I just say thank you for this channel. I'm recently diagnosed (at 52!) and so much of my behaviour that had frustrated me now makes sense. The fact that there are all of you here has instantly made me feel less of a weirdo but the amazing ideas and strategies are genuinely helpful. Much appreciation 👏
I was diagnosed earlier this year and I'm constantly annoyed by how much of neurodiverse education is geared towards children or teens. I'm in my 30's with different problems than a 9 year old at school.
I appreciate this channel so much because it seems written for the demographic I belong to 🌞🌻🤘🏻
recently diagnosed at 56. so glad that this channel was recommended to me
Inner child work has honestly been the most helpful for me, so it's good to hear you're working on it! c: I find it hard to help myself, esp when I'm in a negative spiral, but when I remember I'm neglecting the needs of my past self I can't do that to them. They're just a kid who heard these thoughts so many times from awful people, and I'm not gunna be another bully in that line. It really helps me stay motivated to handle spirals in a healthy way, even when I don't feel I "deserve it".
The timing of this video is amazing I've been dealing with some medical issues and I didn't even realize what I was experiencing was ruminating it's been almost a week straight of spiraling thoughts.
Something that helps me that I saw on Pinterest is saying true things like, "This apple is red," and then something you want to be true like, "I'm going to be okay." Idk why it helps, but it made me feel a lot better. You can do a bunch. "It's raining and I'm okay." This is a phone, and I'm going to do well on the test." It helps if you say them out loud. I haven't been diagnosed with ADHD, but these videos are super helpful for me and I'm going to talk to my doctor about it soon.
I think its also important to say that anxiety can sometimes trick you into thinking that that spiraling and negative talk is a permanent state. So having a list of things to do to change focus, and even taping it to the wall next to you is a good thing to remind you that in fact you can, and will, snap out of it.
You getting frustrated about the RUclips task you were trying to do and using that new technique in real time was so relatable I almost wanted to cry. Thank you for keeping that in to show us we’re not alone ❤️
I had a CBT coach who said I should try to project my "astral self" outside my body, stand behind me and put my hands on my shoulders. I imagine my outside self consoling my body, while thinking of the most beautiful, peaceful place I've ever been (my mothers house in the mountains of Ireland helps). It's the most effective solution to self-destructive, addictive thoughts that I've experienced. Recently I've been trying to be kind to myself and not beat myself up over uncontrollable rumination because I often curse my mind for constantly finding my thoughts on unhelpful and damaging monologues in my mind..it's a work in progress :)
This was a horrendous problem in the past for me. It is so much better than it was, although I can still "go there." Here's what has helped me most consistently: Nature walks, meditation, getting engaged in a project or activity, physical activity that breaks a sweat. I know everybody is different.
Your videos are unfailingly well researched. I like how your expert recommended connecting with your body and engaging in what you're doing. That rings true. Thank you for helping all of us. We all struggle and knowing we face some of the same struggles makes me feel less alone. I'm sure this is true for others, as well.
This was me literally yesterday 😭😂🤣 it's worse before my PMS. It was negative but I literally just wrote in journal every thing that came into my mind to let it out and it helped but this is great information. Thank you fellow brains 🧠
Me too! I find writing out ALLLLL of my worst fears about whatever I'm ruminating on helps me so much. I might be upset/hurting as I'm starting out, but every time resolution and insight and peace comes to me.
I agree! It's definitely worse depending on my hormones that day, ughh. HUGS!
I have also noticed there are certain topics that I ruminate on at times. If I feel the pattern repeating I can ‘zoom out’ of that thought to see the bigger pattern at play. It doesn’t stop it but it helps me to know that soon it will be over and I can detach from it while it is here.
@@elisabethpatterson9417 I love my hormones for giving me the ability to create and nurture my daughters, but oh my, they sure are jerks!
I ruminate in negative self talk so I often ask myself "what would your best friend or your mom have to say about that?" It really helps put things in perspective and Douses the flames that can burn out of control when ruminating
What seems to help me depends on the type of rumniation, but one thing almost always helps: imagining my negative thoughts and bad memories as RUclips videos on my home screen and choosing not to watch them....mentally clicking "do not recommend channel" and using my brain's search bar to search for fun and positive memories...or if I'm overthinking a situation, I write down what it is, to what extent I can control it, and some action steps I can take...it helps to externalize worry and to put it into perspective. Many people say you have to drop down into your body but it doesn't work for me usually...I find more cognitive techniques are useful to me.
A question like this is hard to answer because it depends on what's causing the rumination. The rumination will continue until the thing causing it is handled, or you find another coping mechanism for it. If you can find out what it is and do something about it, that is always the best option. However, if you don't know what it is or can't do anything about the source, distraction usually helps until you find a better coping mechanism.
Source - first-hand experience, so take with a grain of salt.
Yes! Change or Accept it and have the wisdom to know the difference! Excellent points!
I can't tell you how helpful and validating it is to see another person, especially someone I like and admire, having a bad brain day! Thank you for being so open!
In my old office before I relocated, I had a second table. It was for meeting with employees, but I found that if I just moved myself to that table and worked from there, facing a different direction in my office, it would stop the spin and I could focus. It's like I broke that cycle. It also worked on the really bad "squirrel" days. We also had a walking track and sometimes I'd go there, similar to Pete's advice, just to get moving. My new work location doesn't have either of these options and might explain why I'm struggling more. (back to watching, I wasn't done but I'd forget my thought if I waited)
Really appreciate you showing your real-time struggles in this one! I know it's not nice in the moment, but it's so validating seeing others experience and work through similar negative thought spirals - helps me gain some perspective on when I'm in a similar state. Recently I've been struggling with my thoughts becoming hyperfixated on one subject, and the subsequent frustration I feel over not being able to focus on something else I actually want to be doing. I've hardly got any work done today because my mind has been SO fixated on this one area of interest and keeps going back to it, even though I don't even care that much for it and don't think it'll add value to my life. I end up wasting time on these random hyperfixations and feeling bad about myself, and really need to learn to detach from those thoughts and re-anchor and re-engage in what I actually want to be doing.
Thank you for this. a doctor recent told me I probably don't have ADHD and it's more likely anxiety. One of many things I've been thinking in circles about, he's very wrong. I'm a big fan of taking emotion walks to help me figure it out. sometimes it's like walking beside the demon. Sometimes it's like the demon is standing in front of you every step, but it helps! Either to sort of work through what I'm constantly thinking about or to redirect my thoughts so now Instead of thinking about whatever the thing is, I'm thinking about how pretty it is outside
Ha! As if diagnoses stopped at just one thing! How nice would that be? "Ope, can't have ADHD anymore because you've got anxiety now."
Sounds like you're struggling with both. Hope treatment is helping.
@@tinkeramma. Wow how convenient that would be! I'm seeing a different doctor soon, fingers crossed this one will understand you can have more than one issue
@@mikaylacraghead9660 So glad you're off to a different doctor! Hoping for some good quality helping.
Thank you for this video! Have tried to free myself from rumination about an event that happened a week ago. Comment at @9:25 helped me a long. Sending thanks to the poster as well, Sharron Roe!
Thank you for these videos. I was diagnosed a few months ago. Your videos help me realize I’m not alone.
my favorite method for stopping rumination in its early stages is literally to tell my brain "Hey! Drop It" like when you want a dog to stop holding something in their mouth. works like a charm
Getting lost in the spiral especially when I have more important things to do is one of my daily problems. This episode gave me a lot of ideas to deal with that. Thanks a lot! And to think that it was just based on the responses of the community and not a fully researched topic reminded me once again that I'm not alone in this and there are so many people who could relate and give effective advice. I'm so glad to have found this community.
Reminders are key to my mental health and productivity at 69-years-old. I can help a grandson and his parents through ADHD by referring to you. Thanks!
You're welcome!! Thank you so much for such a sweet comment and for supporting what we do! And we're honoured that you find our content good enough to share with family who might be struggling. 🧡
I put myself in a verbal feedback loop. Usually “grace is ok” or if i get into a thought spiral cause a plan or something has changed, ill verbally go through my schedule and reassure myself its ok and the change isnt a big deal.
Literally felt that in my SOUL when you said you suddenly thought "Im not a real RUclipsr" because you werent able to do what you were trying to fast enough That kind of stuff throws me so off and everything comes to a screeching hault. I totally get wanting to cry. I hate it for you but Im glad Im not alone.I know its incorrect logically which makes me feel worse. So thankful for you sharing.
I also found it so interesting when you spoke about the creative thought process can also be creative and making up scenarios. I went to art as an escape and found myself spiraling into anger I never associated that creative thinking maybe the opposite of what I need to do if I'm spiraling. Thank you for sharing I think that if I am going to do something creative it needs to be more structured where I have a start a middle and an ending This could be a healthier way for me to do this. As always you are amazing help to the community and thank you everyone else here that is supporting each other and so thankful to be a part of this community.
I have ADHD myself & it has helped me to identify my reactions to certain triggers.. I have extensive responses to things I think are not in alignment with my values!
What is triggering you to cause the rhumination?
Fix that…root cause
Or a situation that we feel we could have handled better-boundaries & communication of wants/needs
wow this popped up at the PERFECT time! been kinda stuck in a ruminative cycle which has been burning me out even more using up all the energy that could be used for other purposes, THANK YOU!!!
edit : my best analogy would be an endless treadmill of thoughts lol
Another video with incredible advice and seriously relatable content. Ruminating is something I struggle with the worst so I was very excited to see this pop up. Your videos have done so much to help me. I'd known there was wonky stuff going on with my brain for a long time, but stumbling across your content was a game changer. Suddenly so many things in my life, so many things my brain does made sense for the very first time. Now, at 37, I'm finally going to get evaluated for ADHD, among other things. You are an amazing human, thank you so much for everything you do.
This whole thing reminds me so much of “turtles all the way out” by John Green which is a book on ocd. I haven’t found a way to stop ruminating yet and that’s why I think this video will come in handy, but I guess what kind of works for me is listening to loud music, going for a run and writing what’s on my mind at that exact moment on paper. Hope this helps and absolutely love your videos.
Do you know they’re FILMING this book as a movie right now????? I follow Green on TikTok and they’re in production!! I can’t wait!
I was just trying to explain this concept to someone and they were not understanding. It’s so nice to know I’m not alone!! It especially happens when I’m going through something stressful or repetitive, usually in a new situation or responsibility. Thank you for this!
I figure my thoughts are there for a reason and I’d best acknowledge them properly to let them go or they’ll crop back up no matter what. Putting them down in dot point form usually helps. Sometimes that means texting a person to apologise and explain myself whilst letting them know I love and value them. Depends what you’re ruminating on at the end of the day.
I am disabled and stuck in a nursing home right now. I get stuck in thoughts about what I might have done to avoid the current mess or if my plans to leave will ever come to fruition etc. I find it useful to remind myself I don't have a time machine and can't effect the past or even the future. And then I go on RUclips and watch your videos. Thank you for them!
Thank you for not cutting out your frustration and anchoring and spiraling. Also, you're 100% a real youtuber, and that by no means means that you have to be the expert at everything youtube, that is what your team is for after all :D
I have the demon she is always active. So I let myself finish the scenario but then will say, "Nay" and will shake my head and moving on. Those scenarios can keep spiraling and I know they are the past bugging me and then I will go into my RPGing mode and go character mode and it knocks me to a scenario that I can play out online but then when it's done then I can move on.
Your channel has been a light for me. I have ADHD the combined type that includes hyperactivity. With anxiety and depression and autism my brain doesn't always want to shut off and it's hard so your channel speaks to me in a way that says I am not alone. My husband will watch your channel because then feels that he knows me better and has a greater understanding for some of the demons that lurk. I am forever grateful to your channel.
Your an amazing girl who's helps me keep my head.ive been diagnosed with ADHD as a child and stopped the meds at 16 and and now at 40 because I asked for them back it's a nightmare.10 week I've been waiting for a doctor and still nothing.top girl and respect for doing the videos xx
I'm going through the same thing now at 34! Was on the medication in my early 20's, got off of them because I felt like they weren't right for me at the time, moved to a different state, and now it's like I'm having to get diagnosed all over again there have been so many hoops to jump through!
This is an issue with the entire mental health industry. It even affects physical conditions. It boils down to; they don't trust anyone other themselves to make a diagnosis, so any previous diagnosis is ignored as if it never existed. To make it worse, the laws on what qualifies as a diagnosis is actually different state to state meaning you can get a valid diagnosis in one state then move to a state where you are no longer able to get a diagnosis due to the law not your medical condition.
I'm so sorry to hear your doctor hasn't been helping you ☹ So many don't really understand the struggle
Ugh, I feel this. Went 6 months with an ADHD center, and they keep analyzing me forever. I switched doctors twice after that and finally found a RNP who specializes in psychiatric illnesses - put me on meds immediately, helped me keep my job - I still have other issues but don't keep waiting, unless you have no choice - you've got this!
2 things for me: social interaction & working out
Something about the satisfaction of a good conversation with a stranger or loved one combined with a positive workout changes my day completely.
I should take my own advice haha
I've often had issues with rumination/thought spirals as well. Indeed, thinking your way out of it typically doesn't work.
One of the things that works quite well for me is using the Wim Hof breathing method. Look it up on youtube, there's this guided video where you breathe deep in and out for 30 times and then hold your breath (for a couple of minutes, it's crazy how long you're able to do this). You do this 3 times in a row. Whenever my brain is overflowing with thoughts, doing this seems to 'reset' my brain as it just pushes you out of the thoughts you're having (and breathing exercises are great to calm down anxiety too!).
Another great trick (although it isn't really fun) is taking an ice cold shower. Just start with a nice regular warm shower, then put your hand on the temperature controller and in one quick movement push it to the coldest setting and then just take it. Doesn't need to be long, just 30 seconds is enough. Your brain will go into full fight or flight mode, and at that point it's almost impossible to continue ruminating. Your brain is just overwhelmed by the cold feeling and you'll come out of the shower feeling fully 'reset' and whatever you were ruminating about feels like a distant thing.
These two tricks work the best for me, so give it a try and see if it helps :)
I turn on music, and turn up the volume to a level where it almost hurts.... and then slowly turning downm and just enjoy the music when its at a good level again. It sort of resets my mindset and the enjoy it
Sometimes I'll completely stop what I'm doing and cuddle my dog. It's a good way to reset my mind when I'm stuck on certain thoughts. Sometimes it's hard to unglue myself, but once I recognize that I'm ruminating, I have to physically change what I'm doing in that moment as if the bloodflow from moving cleanses my motivations. A lot of introspection required.
To stay on a task I distract my brain by listening to a podcast while I am doing that task. I'm an artist and listening to a podcast while I'm drawing helps to keep me focused. Even my husband watching tv in the background helps because it keeps my thoughts from wondering.
I also have an extreme difficulty if someone is talking to me understanding and following the conversation. My body actually learned how to stay focused to the conversation by fidgeting. I bounce my leg or move my arms while they are talking. In school I would doodle and it actually helped me follow along because it keeps that part of my brain that likes to wonder busy I guess. Lol
Thank you again for these videos. I never knew how much ADHD effects my body as well as my mind and your channel really helps me to understand and helps explain it to my mom who doesn't really get it either. So truly from the bottom of my heart thank you. I'm 36 and I only learned about a year ago that I have ADHD. I've always been diagnosed with anxiety, and depression and yes those do come with ADHD but it's the ADHD that causes a lot of it. So finally getting the treatment I need, I am finally coming to know myself and that is something because honestly I never really cared about myself. I didn't even know my own sense of style and who I am as a person. You have helped me figure that out and that means the world to me.
Oh yes suffered this a lot over the years. It rarely happens now, to the point it shocks me when it does. I recommend a base of Growth Mindset, learn it until it takes no effort. Then for people generally lost in life and not too overly-sensitive with major issues to deal with, Mark Manson.
If people have life issues to deal with that might qualify as Psychiatric / Psychological issues, I recommend Uncommon Knowledge UK on RUclips. The video on Inferiority Complex is very good and helped me absolutely burst my own after two or three watches.
I will never be the most physically attractive, wealthy, athletic or intelligent. Those types of people are extreme outliers. What I can do, is be my best self, a journey of constant self-improvement, and not *care* that I'm not the most handsome, rich, fastest or brainiest.
This then ironically, sets me up to be more attractive, confident, healthier, and try harder to learn!
I have had doctors try to convince me this symptom was so many other things. Not one specialist I've seen over the years, and there's been a lot of them, ever told me about rumination or even the emotional side of ADHD. I've been fighting through this thinking I was just really messed up or had a bad attitude. I lived my entire life not knowing about so much of this being the same core issue I could actually do something about in my head. I never knew, and it made life so much harder. I spent the last few years crying through 2 hour long proctored exams trying so hard to keep it together and managing to pass through sheer willpower and determination. I didn't understand that it wasn't just stress. This changes so much for me, and it leaves an emptiness in my gut knowing how much could have been different. Thank you.
Be Physical: Actual hard labor of any kind. During yesterday’s spiral🌀 I did some hole-digging, dirt-moving and wood-chopping. It got me to refocus on other tasks I wanted to accomplish.
The physicality of doing a menial but taxing activity immediately creates different thoughts.🌿
Dr. K gave some great advice: "Your attention follows your perception." If you change your sensory inputs by listening to something else or looking at something else, your attention will follow
Dude, this is really on topic for me right now. Thanks for putting this out I personally try to remove myself from where I'm ruminating, or I hit something very very hard(I currently blacksmith but I've done martial arts), the physical stimulation is helpful to break the line of thought.
My solution to most ADHD problems is "write it down for later." Rumination/thought spirals aren't a problem to cope with, but something to aspire to. Find ways to get the ideas out!
Remember things are harder when you have to perform, so you don't just have to know how to navigate youtube, you have to navigate youtube, look happy, and be entertaining.
Edit: I've also been imagining talking to you about doing more research in using technology with people with adhd. I just have a lot of faith in you, your energy and the community you built, so if you're second guessing yourself, think about what you do well and adapt the task to work with that.
I had suspicion I had ADHD, but last week my psychologist told me I had it and it is such a relief, I am not longer "just weird", have been subscibed to your channel for over half a year now, keep up the good work. I love you (not in a romantic sense, just that you are awesome and you helped me a lot even before I knew for sure my diagnosis)
Such a great video! My thought spiral has been very severe lately, this was a well-timed video. For me, Parts work/IFS therapy has been really helpful. Similar to inner child work. Hugely healing.
Oh hey I've done some of that - the therapist I was seeing (waiting to see her again, on a list) introduced me to that and it's been an eye-opener!
I recommend the anchor you mentioned. When the person is ruminating, I liken it to your inner child feeling ignored about thier concerns. So they persistently try to engage you. But if you stop, validate the inner voice by taking the time to understand why it is speaking out....put a plan in place to address it in a more appropriate way/time...then find a way to reconnect to the current activity..then the ruminating reduces. I've been doing this for years. As long as you go back and revisit it as promised, the brain rewires over time
Had a breakthrough, the last time I had a nasty thought spiral I recalled all the other thought spirals I had, and that its conclusion was that I could thought spiral myself into permanent damage, I flipped the concept. I could spiral up. The same thought spiral structure can push me into excitement and appreciation.
I was also walking when this process shifted.
Weird but somewhat related question: Does anyone else here sometimes notice that they ruminate about good things that happened in the past? It's almost like I'd be mildly addicted to that memory to see if I could squeeze a little more happiness from it.
I call it "going on a nostalgia run" :)
I love re-living my happiest memories and go back to them often. It’s one of my favorite things to do.
Yes! I noticed that when I have good thoughts it's even harder for me to fall asleep. Because I don't want to put the effort in to stop them as much. A few weeks ago I was "daydreaming" in bed with positive thought-spirals about what I could do with my life, work wise. Checked my clock around 2 and then 5am. 😅 Only at 5am I really made the effort to fall asleep. Fortunately I did not have to get up early. This was not about the past, but positive thoughts at least. And I do have those positive ruminatings about the past, like a nostalia film loop on repeat.
Maybe a good thing your mind drawing you back to what was happy and valuable. Maybe as a way to find similar experiences again?
One of the biggest things for me is to concentrate on breathing. My wife used to complain that I sigh a lot, but it’s usually me just backing off of the thoughts, taking several deep breaths, and concentrating on the breaths only until I am no longer seized up by the anxiety of past mistakes. She has since learned why I do it and understands it.
I really like this format where you take feed back from the community and discuss it :)
Watching this while having a thought spiral about how I can’t drive because I get so distracted and freaked out behind the wheel. Hopefully this gets me out of it
This was an episode that I wasn't particularly expecting to connect with, and then hit home like gangbusters. I would love to hear a follow up on this in six months or so -- what worked for you, Jessica, but also what other members of the community picked up and found helpful.
I love that you mentioned the task and default mode network! That’s something a lot of ‘life hacks’ don’t seem to cover. When I’m trying to give advice to friends based on what I learned in therapy, it helps to explain to them the science of what’s happening in the brain instead of just ‘splash your face with water’ which seems useless and cheesy on its own, I say ‘splash your face to activate the swim reflex and your parasympathetic nervous system’ and it clicks better!
As a person with other issues with ADHD , I use Tapping a lot because I believe ruminating is the brain problem solving which for me-is usually emotionally based and so the time it takes to rid the emotion or neutralize it. I-usually get relief and grow as well by retraining my brain.
I have many other tools incase that doesn’t work ❤️
I love the new videos. The way you’re including the brain hiccups is so relatable. Sometimes I don’t even know what my brain just did and time goes by without me realizing. I used to freak out and get mad at myself. Now I just tell myself it’s okay and that I am doing my best. My best is great and I am amazing!
Not sure if this is the same kind of rumination, but usually when I keep coming back to something in my head it's because I feel like I'm not properly prepared for something (happening in the future), so I find it really helpful to just go through it in my head so that the next time I think of it I can just shove it away, knowing I've already thought it through.
I honestly come and watch your videos. I don’t know why but no matter what I’m going through Your videos seem to be exactly what I seem to be experiencing at that exact moment in life, Which doesn’t completely remove The ruminating part I have but it definitely helps me rationalize it and not feel alone fucking crazy. My love and appreciation for you is off the charts I sincerely mean that.
My problem with rumination is that I can often easily distract myself from it, but once I go back to the task that started it, the spiral starts again.
I so relate to your stream of consciousness thing around 6:50. That was awesome lol.
Can you please do an episode about how adhd for women, especially during the luteal phase, can affect all of the things that are adhd/emotional regulation/rumination. I know PMDD is very common with adhd women and I would love your take on it.
Luteal phase? PMDD? What are those? 😳
@@BoysLoveUnrated A phase of menstruation where the egg has dropped but menses hasn't begun. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Luteal_phase
Not sure about PMDD myself.
Pmdd is premenstrual dysphoric disorder a severe version of PMT pre menstrual tension. Pmdd can cause suicidality or psychosis. It's really hard to live with I believe it's more common in ADHD / ASD