5 Proven Tips For Getting Over Crippling Approach Anxiety
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- Опубликовано: 10 сен 2024
- Do you suffer from a fear of approaching women? If you feel unbelievably scared every time you even think of approaching women, then you need to read and use these simple tips.
Here's a great tip to overcome approach anxiety that I found. Think of a phrase (I use "let's go" but you can use words to that effect: here we go, showtime, let's do it, etc etc) and then every time you say that phrase, do something within three seconds. It can be something simple like checking your email or taking a sip from your drink or sending a text. Do this several times throughout the day. Before you do anything, say the phrase and then do it within 3 seconds. Then, when you go to approach a girl, say "let's go" and you're already in that mindset of instantly doing something so it's a lot easier to approach.
Also, rejection is good, because it means that the wrong girls are weeding themselves out of your garden. 99% of the time, rejection is because you don't meet the girl's criteria for a good mate. And that's fine, you won't meet every girl's criteria (unless you're going off something external like money but even then it's not going to impress everyone) but it'll work out with a few girls. It really is just a numbers game.
LemonZeppelin, is that the name of your Led Zeppelin tribute band?
I did 5 approaches and it was awesome. I did five compliment approaches and 2 of them almost cried right there, I was like have a nice day, I think I am addicted to randomly complementing stranger girls now. :D awesome video.
DOM MINGO Good stuff!
Good job, D!.....Ya have to try.. And, as you get better at your presentation, feel better about "you", you're going to have more positive results, right?...But, for guys just sittin' back, posting bullshit...They're missing the whole point of RLR's vids...We're the male of the species. ..We've got to make the first move, rightD?...I can count on one hand the times I've had a woman aggress on me before I knew them...But, the rewards are far greater than the times ya get flattened. ...You're going strong, Dude!...You get flipped, get up, try again. . And, you're a CHAMPION. ..In whatever. .You've got to turn a negative into a positive. ..And, you're doin ' it!..CONGRATULATIONS! ...Best regards, have a great day, get pussy;-)! Regards, Kirb
Go go go! Please approach. Even if she said no thank you, you brightened her day by telling her she's attractive. We'd rather get hit on once than none at all. And you might make our night. I would never say no thank you for a date or drink if a man approached me. Girls should always give guys at least one chance. So go out there and brighten someone's day. :)
Wow really? Thought I would get slapped
Thanks for the encouragement!
Black guys have no shame and approach anyone and say anything. Be like them, except be respectful and laugh it off if it doesn't go well
The girl actually cracks me up, like she's on a substance or two.
Dude i love your advice but just haveing a mute lady sitting next to you is pretty wierd. Even if she is hot.
not weird at all.. talk show host can have more than one host just sitting there and waiting for their turn... the difference here its that her turn never comes and they are sitting on a large bed.. Richard's approach is different than what is socially common but then again he is the teacher that is giving us advice on how to combat social pressure and find your own way instead of being part of the herd
@@mafnpafn - He is doing that because psychologic marketing case studies show having an attractive female increase a man's perception of value regardless if you know she is paid or not - This works in the animal kingdom by putting a stuff animal female next to a male the male gets more mates (social proof) as we all just animals..... Here is a killer tip...I'm a music producer so work with celebrities so here is a killer tactic used to control social influence/social proof...
Want your approaches to be easy or have girls you approach you? just hire two girls and a camera guy to follow you for the night and just be confident and dress stylish as hell...and watch what happens sure beats wasting the $$$ on drinks.
If she owned a liqueur store as well she would be the perfect woman.
@@songsofthecentury3909 I’d like to liq ueur store... get it? Me neither...
One think I've surely learned: women are just pieces of furniture for this guy.
as it should be, for any real alpha male.
Recommend good channels then
Good advice, but what's with the awkward call girls? They add nothing to the videos.
Agree totally
They're just trying to demonstrate value to the viewers.. Makes sense honestly, this one particularly looked very uncomfortable with herself cause she didn't know what to do
Nice to look at :)
I have a hard time just calling a girl so this is working for sure. I hear this all the time. Practice makes perfect.
Richard before starting the video: "u just sit there and be good looking"
lol
I think what most guys still don't realize is that in order to get girls on a consistent level and in a healthy way, you mainly have to core change yourself, and not try to change the women's opinion about being with you. And you DO already change yourself by every single cold approach you because you're tackling approach anxiety, which is in my opinion actually the fear of changing yourself! I think the result of longterm pickup is basically transforming you into an alpha male. Just adding some thoughts here, GG!
Well here is what happened to me a few weeks ago. I got to the club walked up the stairs and without even having talked to anybody yet I suddenly had a tongue in my mouth. I was totally flabbergasted while her hands where all over me and I mumbled something like "thanks" and walked away....hows that for anxiety?
LMAO
The woman on the left made some good points in this video.
Having that women sitting there was just fucking wierd
Nowadays we have people studying how to get girls. holly shit life is becoming competitive!
Excellent video. The instructor addresses some of the most important concepts such as (1) having a few pre-planned openers in mind (2) enhancing your public speaking skills (3) Practicing beforehand (4) having a pre-determined number of women to approach and (5) getting a "wing man" or buddy to go with you.
I realized where my "approach anxiety," stems from. When I shift from my straight path into the direction of the girls path,I have the fear of the girls "reaction" (to the fact that I'm approaching her) or in the case of the manipulative social anxiety its actually a very very, "judgemental reaction." I emphasize the word "very" because approach anxiety or social anxiety makes you perceive the girls judgment of your actions, (referring to walking in her direction) in a more exaggerated version than what the reality of her thoughts actually are. I become convinced of this exaggerated version and it creates pressure. Ive already convinced myself that 100 percent of my approach anxiety comes from my worries about her initial reaction to me approaching her and I think this is true very every guy. I think its false when suggested in videos that approach anxiety comes from fear of various outcomes during the approach, like fear of rejection, or fear of having nothing to say. the approach anxiety all comes from fear of getting judged before the approach. The reason for this is because when ur under anxiety, your not thinking that far ahead.. but u are thinking about what this girl my think if I start walking towards her.
probly should make sure you plan the practice approaches at least an hour away from home base lol, that way you don't run into any of them again in the future they might remember you and your stumbling efforts lol
I only come here cause he hire's pretty girls.
what
approach anxiety is the best part of the interaction..
Good video encouraging people to get out and conquer their anxiety by taking positive action and gaining experience.
Depression and anxiety make things difficult but I still to Want try.
why do people always recommend the mall? the mall ain't nothing but a bunch of jailbait with their moms. hella awkward..
Well women in their 20s need to get clothes somewhere too.
that female ventriloquist is talented AF
lol oh my god that girl looks very uncomfortable... looking all around with a fake expression the entire time. she looks like she's ready to get up and go. no offense to you rich, it's her problem after all. i was laughing so i had to cover that part of the screen with my hand.
LOL
yeah somebody teach her how to comfortable and confident it's not all about looks bitch
BUT IM SCARED
Involve the wing girl more, tips comimg from her will help men to understand women more
this girl is the most beautiful of your all!
interesting, but actually not very helpful tips, guys who couldn't make their first approach won't still be able to do it, this tips are very minor and do not address the core reason of approach anxiety, there actually is a video on my stream about Approach Anxiety
Well here's what happened to me once, Richard.
I was at a kind of club and there was this very beautiful girl,probably a couple of years older than me. I decided to actually make a move for once, so I went and introduced myself. It was not the best opening in the world, but it was not downright terrible or disgusting or creepy, it was just an average greeting.
well that girl 3 seconds after I introduced myself, actually *pushed* me, slowly away from her towards the exit of the club.
What the hell? How am I supposed to NOT have AA after that?
I still can't explain it, and believe me when I say that I'm not ugly. at least not THAT much.
It hurts to just think about it.
that sucks dude
probably nothing to do with you tho maybe she had a terrible day or had been hit on by someone obnoxious recently
it's a bit of a numbers game if that happens once it sticks out in your mind but 10 smooth approaches don't stick out as much because they are not as anxiety provoking
You basically have to not give a fuck about it. Either keep trying with her or just move on like nothing.
sorry to hear that happened to you - probably more a reflection on her than you - speak to more people so you get some friendly responses to balance it out
Sure it hurts but you have to keep trying.
How about his as an example: Let's say you started drawing and decide to show your work to strangers. There will be a lot of criticism, not every response being constructive and that might hurt. But if you like your drawings, chances aren't too bad that someone else does as well. Even one good response will clear your head from all the bad ones.
Long story short, keep doing it, talk to women and don't bother if you get rejected. Happens to everyone.
dahrrg
That's a pretty nice comparism. IF you really like yourself, i guess that doesn't apply to a lot of people, men and women equally.
whats up with the mute bimbos in every video.
+HEWfunkingKNEWit yeah, I have to like block her with my hand to pay attention.
Social proof haha
Beta food
DavePazz 😂😂 feminist will not be happy
Great advice! Its all about taking chances and the number of girls you approach. Eventually, you'll get laid. Thanks man. The girl next to you was kind of creepy though.
I just love how there is always a girl even if she doesn't make any sense there. xD
They're just so insecure how to look, where to look and how to behave. :D
it would be good to hear "her" opinion just after "he" stops talking
why? Who cares about some model? Its all about the alpha.
Thanks Richard. I love your videos.
I like how he has the Asti in the intro; that's exactly what I use! lol
did i just hear SHOCK THERAPY!?
I have been an actor (amateur & professional) for 8 years. I still get scared AF of approaching - being good at public speaking/being in front of people does not help me much.
I think it's because when you're doing most forms of public speaking, acting, performance you're in front of an audience who has *chosen* to be there. But, when you're in a café or something, talking to someone out of the blue can be scary, because you feel like you're imposing and such. I also get scared of telling girls they look nice because I'm afraid some crazed feminist will see what I'm doing & get mad at me.
I think really the solution is what you say at the end: "shock therapy" - just get out there and fucking traumatize yourself by approaching more women than you believed you possibly could.
Yet, I've done way more than the five cold-approaches you recommend, & it isn't getting much easier. *sigh*
Keep movin'
Is that the queens bedroom????
This model is so awkward. She has no idea where to look or focus. It's very distracting.
she's probably russian or eastern european and doesn't speak english that well.
I wasn't joking. Rich has found that his fav girls are model type girls from eastern europe / russia (excellent choice btw). I believe he lives in russia currently.
I think the winner of the coin-toss should go first, not the loser. Same result, better mindset.
I actualy enjoy the approach.
that's great! Most guys really don't, so you have an advantage!
How do you enjoy it?
Lrdvltr Well, it's exciting. You get adrenaline. And it's a fun experience atleast for me. Shutting down youre emotions can help with it. Also loosing stress would.
Eriks Liepins I should learn to try that. It's the hardest thing for me; I just want to meet people and express myself.
***** Thank you very much for your advice. I will try this for sure!
Ok, someone explain to me, what was the role of that girl awkwardly sitting there not knowing how the hell to spend her time?! She probably didn't even understand English and was just there because this guy thinks sticking pretty girls into anything would work. It was so distracting that I ended up opening up a new tab to just hear the talk. Reminds me of cigarette companies having girls in their ads. Just because the topic is girls, doesn't mean there should be one present there at any cost.
She's probably thinking "When does he want me to give him the topless hand job he paid me for?"
consider it done
Her cheeks must be so tired from all that smiling.
Do you have a website where I can find your videos, books and else? Besides there is a doubt I have about your speech at the 21 Convention in 2010 (emotional, motivational & personality traits) and I can't find a way to clear it out.
Excellent, and very succinct, advice!
What do you recommend for people that are shy or have anxiety and get even more nervous after they get rejected the first time?
you guys should have a chick flick playing on an ipad placed above the camera so the models stay centered and more proffesional. great advice!
something i might have to try out thanks rich
That android next to him was creeping me out. She really doesn't want to be there does she, must be getting paid lots
Thnks Richard... These really helped me!!!
thanks! that was really helpful.
I have a random question though. Why is that girl just sitting there next to you doing nothing??
She looks like she's thinking "This isn't where I parked my car...".
Hey, that's Anya from the first Super Seducer game....at least I think that was her name, from what I remember.
Yes, well spotted!
yeah Rich, come on now... the girl tilting her head and all. I'm approaching tomorrow though as long as there's no snowing/raining!
Does anyone here know who this girl is in the video?
Hey Richard. I dont know if you normaly answer question, but i have one. Its about something that has personally been a small problem for me and really kicks my anxiety into high gear and has ruined alot of potential phone numbers for me. Its about approaching a group of women with your focus set to one of the girls, but when you start talking to her and her alone her friends starts to get sort of "deffensive". When i approach a group of girls i of course introduce myself to everyone and maybe crack a joke or something just to sort of interact with all of them. But i usually have my eyes set on one of the girls and i start to focus more on her after a while. This is where ive noticed several times that her friends becomes really deffensive of their friend. They might grab a hold of her and tell you "sorry but shes with me", or anything that signals that they want you gone. How do you deal with a situation like this?
If the girl likes you enough, yo will see that she starts to ignore her friends and they will realise that she likes you and leave you alone. If it's not quite strong enough, they might pull her away. In some situations when the girls are very protective, but she wants to talk to you, all you can do is try and win the friends over, or go for a faster close and tell her you don't want to take her from her friends so you should meet 1on1 sometime.
damn i am so shy that i was even stared by a girl and was nearly approached by her ! but i couldn't say anything ..! damn that hurt me as fuck that day
Feel the pain, remember it next time. 3 second rule. Lock eye contact, 3...2...approach. Don't give your brain time to talk you out of it.
Didn't learn as much from that one
Finally where have you been? Looking forward to this.
Btw, can we send mail to you? need your advice.
thanks Richard
Isn't she the girl from the second level, Anna/Anya/Anja? She has an amazing face/smile.
Yes it is!
what a setting
thank you❤
must be so awkward for the women to just sit there and not say anything. just... lookin around. sometimes at the camera. sometimes at him. sometimes making a little smile. sometimes making some other facial expression. just sitting there being pretty. its just weird man. i watched this whole vid and have no clue waht you were taalking about because of her. what is the point
Is there a mail where send some questions with more info?
That girl look so Swedish!
May be I dont get it but please can anyone explain to me what is all this dating thing about? What I mean is that it looks to me like giving Viagra to men who dont want to fuck. If he doesn't want to fuck and you give him viagra, you are unnaturally forcing him into sex against his will, just like farmers do to their cattle to increase the number of livestock. But if he does want to fuck, then you don't need to give him any viagra. I think the same must be with dating, isn't it? If you really want to pickup women and mean it with all your heart and mind, you dont need any motivation or even techniques for that, because your natural desire will guide you and empower you. But if you dont wish it in your subconscious for various reasons, then imposing pickup techniques and tricks on you will again be against your true core, just like with viagra example. What do you think guys?
I've been speaking with a woman since late January. We've made out a few times and see each other on a weekly basis. I've been slowly becoming more and more aggressive as time goes on, but I still don't want to over do it. We haven't even broken through the barrier of crossing friends, yet I have met both her mother and her sister.
She really isn't over her ex, he broke up with her nearly 9 months ago, but I believe they're still in contact. She gets nervous about the idea of dating and she seemingly doesn't like to make commitments to arrangements more than a day in advance.
I know some of her friends know about me, but I'm no where close to being known as even a potential boyfriend.
Any advice on how to move through this barrier?
Good video. But please cut out the random girls if they are not adding to the conversation.
thing is I have a social anxiety
Start working out 3-5 times per week ! If you can't at gym, start doing bodyweight exercises. Stay consistent and this quote worked for me:
"When you feel like quitting think about why you started."
BeBe AndreW working our for 6 months before that (after summer) whole year
I used to too! I forced myself to do a TEFL course, salsa classes, acting workshop, and met up with local PUA guys. Now I'm comfortable in front of big crowds, on live TV, and of course talking to girls. Do some scary things and it'll get better. Good luck!
***** I think it's great you comment in response to a lot of people
Boss
I am 40 and look 32 ish I want a girl like that am i dr3eaming?
It is only a dream if you think it is.
I like her tips more lol
does a real man really have "crippling approach anxiety"???
Yeah. We've trained big tough army guys with AA, successful businessmen, MMA fighters. Guys who are very manly...but they still have it.
okay lol
Well I was about to comment on the girl but I guess I'm not the only one to notice that. It seems like you're kind of treating her as a prop there and not a person. At least introduce her and have her say something.
Shes fine.
why a handsome young, tall, non bald, slim man is talking about approach anxiety? oh! maybe he can tell us he was shy in the childhood and now that "big" problem is over and has a lot of succes with women... is this video a joke??? and wtf is doing the mute and bored girl near him??
Why is there just some girl sat next to you doing nothing bored AF
INXS?
love the awkward looking girls sat there saying nothing
Did anyone catch Richard Laruna come out the closet @ 3:45 I didn't know dude was gay. Yathinkyaknowaguy#
Demarco Williams lol no dude, that was talking about when I did a 1on1 training and i did meet a guy (to train him) lol
No.... Just no.
Hahaha he said approach the guy
Bad advice, if you tell someone that it sounds like you've got an agenda, "You are stylish"!
Who's the eye broccoli?
....... ohhhhhhhhh just kidding that girl is extremely attractive
Is it just me or do the girls he has next to them always look really dense lol
ummm whats with the mute lady?
am seriously annoyed with the eye candy if you are going to be in the video contribute dammit
Did she really just sit there silently for 7 minutes???
Why is the woman sitting there ?! Is she an “object “? Ffs .
No!
Its a classic marketing ploy - put a hot girl next to the speaker, to increase his supposed "credibility", and get her to look and smile at him to increase attractiveness. The idea being that guys will "buy" into the advice subliminally! .. all down to selling the brand and increasing sales!!.. But when its this blatant, it has the opposite effect!!
The CityGuy wow you are so smart. So making an attractive scene for a clip is not the aim, it's all about selling. And me doing a big fucking PITCH at the end of the video wouldn't be a better way of generating sales than all the subtle stuff you are talking about. Of course.
I put this on and stepped away to multitask. The content allowed it to resonate through my home.
what is that girl job just sit ? 😂
It is just marketing / clickbait. So they know that he is not fully full of shit.
the girl looks like a robot, looks like she doesnt really know how to act haha
ty for video
Why is that woman there? Is she everyones idea of hot? With all that makeup too. Dam.
that girl looks so awkward ! hahaha
she has great leggs
Nice blond, she still at school?
hard to pay attention lel ;D
HELP
Only if you teach me french