How To Find A Man When You're DESPERATE! // Traditional Dating Advice 101

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  • Опубликовано: 10 июл 2024
  • #datingadvice101 #datingadvice #howtofindaman
    GET ACCESS TO MY EXCLUSIVE CONTENT HERE: classicallyabby.substack.com
    Today I want to share 5 things to do when you're desperate to find a man! Share your thoughts down below.
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    Hey! I'm Abby, the creator of Classically Abby. I'm a wife, mama, homemaker, opera singer, and RUclipsr who is doing my best to live a classic life each and every day. If you want to know more, head over to www.classicallyabby.com/about...!
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    00:00 Introduction
    01:48 Focus On Self-Growth
    04:22 Use Dating Apps
    07:37 Ask Your Friends To Set You Up
    09:47 Visit Friends Outside Of Your Area
    12:03 Host A Party

Комментарии • 121

  • @al-bq5di
    @al-bq5di 9 месяцев назад +40

    I gave up on dating. By the 3rd date the man always wants sex. I just bought a house on my own. People tell me I'm too beautiful to give up but seriously I'm better on my own. I especially hate the "what do you bring to the table table" question. I've learned to enjoy my singleness

    • @bosco_sticks
      @bosco_sticks 9 месяцев назад +4

      Seems like a fair question to be asked. You ask others what they bring to the table too. Maybe not overtly but you have criteria

    • @tigerbear3038
      @tigerbear3038 9 месяцев назад +4

      Please don’t think that. I hear from women that they encounter these men but I’m a man and I like to take things slow. I don’t mind waiting to be intimate until we get into a relationship even if it means months

    • @AngelineProductions
      @AngelineProductions 7 месяцев назад +2

      @@tigerbear3038oh no! Months without sex, however will you survive?!

    • @AngelineProductions
      @AngelineProductions 7 месяцев назад

      @nameunavailable4435what are you doing in your marriage to foster an environment that makes your wife feel safe and loved?

    • @KpopOpinionator
      @KpopOpinionator 7 месяцев назад

      ​@nameunavailable4435wow bascially all u need is to be intimate. ?

  • @avpthegreat
    @avpthegreat 10 месяцев назад +14

    Ladies, I have arrived

  • @BasedGamerX
    @BasedGamerX 10 месяцев назад +32

    Dont take this personally, its actually a compliment, but.......
    Taking dating advice from a deeply religious tradcon who married really young is like taking blackjack advice from someone who hit the 21 on their first hand and never played again.
    Take advice on how to be and stay married from them. That advice will be rock solid.
    Edits are because i have fat thumbs and i forgot to proofread lol

    • @Blessedbyvypercc
      @Blessedbyvypercc 10 месяцев назад +2

      That’s a fair critique. Honestly my parents have been married 35 years and they still don’t know why they remained together lol their love is weird, but I can’t deny they love each other very deeply.

    • @zerosama5743
      @zerosama5743 9 месяцев назад

      Your RUclips name is Basedgamerx why would anyone take your comment seriously?

    • @mmekk123
      @mmekk123 9 месяцев назад

      @@zerosama5743They’re right and they should say it

    • @danielzza100
      @danielzza100 9 месяцев назад

      @@zerosama5743 Your RUclips name is zerosama5743 why would anyone take your comment seriously?

    • @Snappypantsdance
      @Snappypantsdance 9 месяцев назад +3

      Not exactly sure how to read your comment. A very backhanded compliment? The best person to take dating advice from is a person that married young and has stayed that way if that is what the listener also wants….

  • @theAshesofDecember1
    @theAshesofDecember1 10 месяцев назад +19

    As a guy, when I was desperate, I would mostly just rewatch the office or how I met your mother and daydream of meeting a real life pam or the mother.
    Not the best resolution method but it was also cozy in its own way

  • @thatexcalifornian6124
    @thatexcalifornian6124 10 месяцев назад +13

    I met my fiancé when my parents and his parents had us meet. I was pissed about the idea at first because I didn’t ask for it, but once I met him, my opinion changed. ❤❤❤

    • @GastNdorf
      @GastNdorf 8 месяцев назад +1

      I wish we brought that back more, my family wouldn't move a finger for me, and they're all women...

  • @stellajoy9361
    @stellajoy9361 8 месяцев назад

    I actually really like this video, which surprised me

  • @leebishop7591
    @leebishop7591 10 месяцев назад +7

    U know we don't have to be Godly, we can also respect your religion. depsite what we think, its all about support. This ungodly man might even go with you to church so u don't feel alone. but if the love is there and your not hurting or shoving your faith, a man can support u, love u and not be Godly.

  • @LonelyGamr
    @LonelyGamr 10 месяцев назад +6

    ladies, look no further 😉

  • @emmaociee
    @emmaociee 10 месяцев назад +19

    Almost 30 and just looking for a Godly man with his life together…someone who will pursue me and lead a family towards the Lord. It makes me sad that people assume that all older single ladies are shallow and have *chosen* to party and play around - or - that we have unrealistic standards!

    • @Malkav
      @Malkav 10 месяцев назад +12

      Pursue you? You're almost 30. 18 to 25 y/o gets pursued. At your age you gotta be doing the pursuing now.

    • @120Pythons
      @120Pythons 10 месяцев назад

      ​@@MalkavYou're full of shit lol.
      Beautiful women get pursued.
      You talk as if 29 is drastically older than 24 too. It is still very young. She isn't 40 with kids.

    • @Yesica1993
      @Yesica1993 10 месяцев назад

      I'm 50+ and have pretty much given up. Have never partied/played around. Nor do I have unrealistic standards. I just want a godly man. But unless God does a genuine miracle, I will die alone.

    • @stevekjr9563
      @stevekjr9563 10 месяцев назад +2

      @@Yesica1993 Define a Godly Man. The reality is that your definition likely excludes 99% of the men who would be interested in you.

    • @emmaociee
      @emmaociee 10 месяцев назад +3

      @@Malkav LOL. You and I must have different definitions of "pursue." My point is, it's a man of God's role to be the leader in a relationship. I have asked guys out and definitely shown interest, but I'm not going to continue a relationship with a passive guy who isn't actively showing interest in me. Lots of women want to boss and "mother" their spouse - that's not my thing.

  • @granitesand78
    @granitesand78 6 месяцев назад +1

    i'm a 38yo airline pilot dude who's never been married and I completely understand how one gets comfortable in singleness. I feel like so many modern chicks are nuts. Godless, politically far left, etc. But reading these comments is kinda breaking my heart. I dont use dating apps anymore. I'm constantly busy visiting friends or traveling or hobbies, I'm almost just past dating now. But I know that ultimately it would be more fulfilling to be married and have a kid.

    • @Andrew--S
      @Andrew--S Месяц назад

      I turn 38 this year. I'm also past dating. I can only take so much rejection & ghosting. Just like the 'sunk cost fallacy', at some point i am a moron for continuing to waste time, money, & energy.

  • @Blessedbyvypercc
    @Blessedbyvypercc 10 месяцев назад +8

    Honestly you did a good job on this advice. Even for ppl that don’t live a traditional lifestyle but still want to pair. It surprises me how many of your videos actually apply to people that are not trad con.

  • @ethicalcheeze1407
    @ethicalcheeze1407 9 месяцев назад +1

    This should be fun, lol

  • @shannoncolby712
    @shannoncolby712 10 месяцев назад +2

    I met my fiancé on bumble!

  • @AngelineProductions
    @AngelineProductions 7 месяцев назад +3

    It’s so weird when people confidently declare that men and women can’t be platonic friends. It’s not true, and it shows a lot of projection and bias.

  • @deannapickman4867
    @deannapickman4867 10 месяцев назад +1

    Great dating tips!
    Also, your hair looks amazing in this video!

  • @Jessistein88
    @Jessistein88 10 месяцев назад +2

    Love this! Thank you for the advice! 🙌🏼🙏🏼

  • @user-ln4gd6hx7e
    @user-ln4gd6hx7e 10 месяцев назад +1

    Female Clayton Bigsby

  • @firefirefirefirefire
    @firefirefirefirefire 10 месяцев назад

    I needed this video! I've been feeling quite pessimistic about finding someone recently despite still being very young (as in, about to graduate highschool young) but seeing the way people date nowadays has been a little offputting to me. I know there are a lot more people out there than the ones in my small little town though 😅 will try to remember this advice when I am in college/start working and am in a place where I can properly start looking for someone serious ❤ another great video Abby hope you're well :)

  • @SMW_Physicist
    @SMW_Physicist 6 месяцев назад +1

    First of all, how did this get recommended to me in the first place? Second of all, this comment section is a lot cringier than it needs to be.

  • @strawbabbie
    @strawbabbie 10 месяцев назад +4

    lowkey a good video from you. bravo

  • @Nick-oh3ex
    @Nick-oh3ex 8 месяцев назад +3

    This was exceptionally boring

  • @alahad
    @alahad 10 месяцев назад +5

    Helloo desperate women that clicked on this video! hmu

    • @ivst4r
      @ivst4r 10 месяцев назад

      U rlly thought that would work huh

    • @alahad
      @alahad 10 месяцев назад

      @@ivst4r nahhh

    • @ivst4r
      @ivst4r 10 месяцев назад

      @@alahad how pathetic. Embarrassing for u 😭

  • @themoog924
    @themoog924 10 месяцев назад +4

    Is this coming from a Jewish perspective?

  • @notmytruthTHEtruth
    @notmytruthTHEtruth 10 месяцев назад +2

    Desperate women I'm your remedy 😎

  • @Seadog7981
    @Seadog7981 10 месяцев назад +9

    Brett looks different.

  • @meydiaengka
    @meydiaengka 7 месяцев назад

    I want a love that lasts a lifetime, the kind of love I saw my father gave my mom 😢❤

  • @loversRule
    @loversRule 9 месяцев назад

    No one knows the rout to Hamunaptra!!!

  • @sevengauge89
    @sevengauge89 10 месяцев назад +2

    Shout out to Benny Shaperio lol

  • @youngtrout4950
    @youngtrout4950 10 месяцев назад +3

    Arranged marriage is very effective

    • @Snappypantsdance
      @Snappypantsdance 9 месяцев назад +2

      Lol, it sounds so wrong and backward, but I actually agree:).

    • @svn5994
      @svn5994 2 месяца назад

      Quite the opposite

  • @JoeyJ0J0
    @JoeyJ0J0 10 месяцев назад +2

    Just ask the guy out yourself, also shave, bathe and be nice

  • @SDguy3030
    @SDguy3030 10 месяцев назад +6

    No way women are desperate in this age of dating.

    • @sjoelle3335
      @sjoelle3335 10 месяцев назад +15

      Women are not desperate for a hookup in this age of dating.If they are desperate, it is for a husband. I am an older millennial woman and not married. I have 22 year old men trying to pick me up.I’m not unattractive, but I’m not a supermodel by any measure. Finding a man is not hard, finding a husband seems impossible.

    • @firefirefirefirefire
      @firefirefirefirefire 10 месяцев назад +2

      Quality over quantity mate

  • @reckless7226
    @reckless7226 10 месяцев назад +8

    Wrong mam
    200 years ago women didn’t get to choose who they ended up with
    Even 50 years ago women were just barely starting to be able to choose who they ended up with

    • @aaronreeve1414
      @aaronreeve1414 9 месяцев назад +2

      Men in arranged marriages don’t get to choose who they end up with either. Stop acting like women deserve Bonus Victim Points.

    • @tigerbear3038
      @tigerbear3038 9 месяцев назад +4

      Lol. If women didn’t get to choose then why was there a need throughout history for men to impress women ?

    • @AngelineProductions
      @AngelineProductions 7 месяцев назад +1

      That literally historically innaccurate 😂

  • @cocoa3202
    @cocoa3202 10 месяцев назад +9

    PLS LIKE THIS SO ABBY SEE IT Abby I'm not here to hate you and reading this comment I'm about to make, you probably think I am. And this doesn't relate to your current video but I do have a genuine question I would like for you either to respond to or make part of a video. You say that abortion is murdering a living thing, but then isn't that saying cancer and viruses should still live in your body, cause theres bacteria and cells that are alive in there. Isn't that murdering a living thing? And my second question is how is a fetus a baby, after what a couple weeks or months? And you say that its not their body but it is something living in their body so doesn't that make them have a choice? I'm not here to hate, but I would genuinely like to know your response. Also last question. What are your thoughts on LGBTQ? Sorry if its bad english, its my second language.

    • @cocoa3202
      @cocoa3202 10 месяцев назад +4

      @@user-eo6rk4nu2o but its not a human.... look at the definition of the word fetus

    • @beesilly
      @beesilly 9 месяцев назад

      ​@@cocoa3202fetus is unborn offspring. What is an unborn offspring of a human other than a human? Is it an alien? A dog? A cat? No it is a human.

    • @juanarang7801
      @juanarang7801 9 месяцев назад

      @@cocoa3202what definition? The one that fits your views? Listen I am still pro abortion but that argument is the most inhumane anyone can imagine. You really think that an embryo is bacteria, that a fetus is not human. Then why would be human a persons paralyzed or with mentally incapacitating conditions or newborns which still don’t have reasoning? They are a burden to us all, we should simply get rid of all of them.

    • @pwqshiiv.
      @pwqshiiv. 9 месяцев назад

      Real

    • @WorldofTanks48
      @WorldofTanks48 9 месяцев назад +3

      ​@@cocoa3202 But that is the whole point, she thinks that it is a human life, and so do I. This is why we think that it's murder. There are quite a few definitions of a fetus, but this topic is way too politicised to know the truth at this point.

  • @Andrew--S
    @Andrew--S 10 месяцев назад +4

    Men who are single for so long get comfortable and don't want to risk losing what they've earned.
    In my late 20's i had 5 ex's and flings contact me out of the blue all within 6 weeks of each other. It seemed like too much of a coincidence. At lunch with one of them she asked me a bunch of questions about my opinion on marriage in the 21st century. I realized what was happening. These women were getting desperate. It disgusted me because i wasn't good enough for them in my early 20's but now they are running out of options so i'm good enough in their late 20's.
    I will not be a woman's last option.
    Also the Sunk Cost Fallacy applies to dating. I will not waste one more minute or one more dollar on dating. I'm 37 years old. It's been very obvious for a long time that i will be forever single. I'm not getting fooled into paying for another dinner just to get ghosted.
    Do not wait until your 30's to find a partner.
    Don't ignore the majority of men. Their attention doesn't last forever.

    • @al-bq5di
      @al-bq5di 9 месяцев назад +12

      You don't sound like a keeper anyway

    • @AngelineProductions
      @AngelineProductions 7 месяцев назад

      Loser

    • @joeysmith3475
      @joeysmith3475 Месяц назад

      I hope you find a woman you can love

    • @Andrew--S
      @Andrew--S Месяц назад

      @@joeysmith3475 Nah. The time for that is long over. I turn 38 this year. I'm not going to waste anymore time just to get ghosted & rejected.
      Men do not have an unlimited will to wait years until women suddenly realize they are not going to get a man that fits their long checklist then go running back to the men they rejected years ago. Men know the game and are refusing to play.
      I refuse to be a woman's last option. I'd rather be single than get leftovers.

    • @joeysmith3475
      @joeysmith3475 Месяц назад

      @@Andrew--S You don't have to be someone's second choice. At the very least you should be able to attract women who you're meeting for the first time.
      I hope you don't close your heart. I know there's a lot of terrible women out there but the right one is worth it.

  • @carlesls
    @carlesls 10 месяцев назад +7

    Terrible advice.

  • @openbob6656
    @openbob6656 10 месяцев назад +6

    looking for HOT PETITE FERTILE DESPERATE girlfriend

    • @ivst4r
      @ivst4r 10 месяцев назад +6

      Cringe

    • @melissam597
      @melissam597 10 месяцев назад +5

      Maybe don't say "fertile"

    • @openbob6656
      @openbob6656 10 месяцев назад +1

      @@melissam597 why? it is a legitimate requirement :D no barren women allowed if you want to become a father in the future and have kids.

    • @Snappypantsdance
      @Snappypantsdance 9 месяцев назад

      Hot, petite, fertile
      Really translated-
      Slutty and gold-digger in reality.
      Maybe change your list…?

    • @dianadoraen7864
      @dianadoraen7864 9 месяцев назад +1

      🤢🤢🤢

  • @JohnSmithIlIlIlIl
    @JohnSmithIlIlIlIl 10 месяцев назад +9

    My biggest advice for lonely women is LOWER YOUR STANDARDS. This is OkCupid talking, not just me.
    If you're over 30, you are statistically NOT going to find a handsome, 6-figure+ income, 6ft+ guy whose in peak shape.
    Those guys are 10/10s and statistics show that those 10/10 guys ONLY date 22-year-old women.
    ...You might as well buy lottery tickets.

    • @Aliciae411
      @Aliciae411 10 месяцев назад +12

      Honestly women of any age have an endless amount of men to choose from. This idea that being over 30 means you can’t find somebody that you like is wrong. The idea that all women want a super rich, crazy tall 10/10 guy is just not true. Obviously some people are extremely picky like that but not most.

    • @JohnSmithIlIlIlIl
      @JohnSmithIlIlIlIl 10 месяцев назад +1

      @@Aliciae411 It's OkCupid's statistics that women on online dating sites have ridiculously high standards.
      90%+ of Women across all dating sites go after the top 1% - 2% of men.
      On the other hand, Men in general, aside from that top 1%- 2%, are hardly picky at all! (This is both OkCupid's statistics and from what I've seen IRL.)
      I've seen a diverse variety of women of all shapes and sizes land fairly average looking to somewhat attractive guys.
      They just needed to give up on that 6ft, 6 figure income ideal.

    • @Andrew--S
      @Andrew--S 10 месяцев назад +1

      @@Aliciae411 Men over age 30 who have been single for a majority of their adult life get comfortable being single. They also get jaded or figure they aren't good enough. No man wants to be suckered into another date that goes nowhere. Men do not have an unlimited budget or unlimited time to waste.
      Men and women who wait until age 30 to find a partner are playing life on hard mode. Why play on hard mode when you can play on easy mode? Start looking for a partner early.

    • @Aliciae411
      @Aliciae411 10 месяцев назад +1

      @@JohnSmithIlIlIlIl honestly I can’t believe that’s true. 90% of women only wanting 6 figure, tall etc. is a crazy statistic and you’d be silly to believe it. I’d wonder how the app gathered that data and whether it is simply women don’t swipe right on so many men and that translates to them being pickier. Women have to be more selective with who they choose so they’re not inundated with unwanted messages and attention. This kind of false statistic is what certain male influencers will spout to support their hateful views of women. All this does is hurt men and women.
      Dating apps don’t even display a persons income on their profile. Women are not much different to men with what they’re looking for in a partner.
      I just looked up data from an app I had used and only 18% of women ranked appearance as most important. Personality came out as the most important aspect of wanting to date somebody. Interests and being emotionally available next and height, job and wealth last with only 2% of women saying those are most important. Obviously most men and women when looking for a partner are most interested in getting along with them, someone who is their best friend with shared interests and personality matches.
      Maybe you’re in a different country to mine and that makes a difference.
      It’s true that men will swipe on anyone though, it makes you uncertain because they’re not really interested in you specifically to start they’ll just take whatever they can get to begin with.
      Maybe it’s not women who are picky but men who are desperate.

    • @Aliciae411
      @Aliciae411 10 месяцев назад +4

      @@Andrew--S you assume men and women are not looking until then.

  • @carlesls
    @carlesls 10 месяцев назад +3

    To catland ladies.

  • @TreyParkersBitch
    @TreyParkersBitch 10 месяцев назад +13

    I know without watching this is terrible advice

    • @Snappypantsdance
      @Snappypantsdance 9 месяцев назад +3

      Well, I’ve been married 25 years and I agree with her….
      How long have you been married?

    • @TreyParkersBitch
      @TreyParkersBitch 9 месяцев назад

      @@Snappypantsdance I’m actually not married. I’m a single, angry feminist in my mid-40’s and I live alone in my overpriced 1 bedroom apartment with my four cats. I have to work 60+ hours a week just to afford the rent for this over priced dump, all because I insisted I have a career. Any free time I have is spent drinking bottles of wine and watching reruns of Sex and the City, while sulking and feeling sorry for myself all alone with my cats. I guess I should’ve listened to Classically Abby.

    • @svn5994
      @svn5994 2 месяца назад

      @@Snappypantsdance Ah yes agreeing with a tradcon woman. Great advice.

    • @Andrew--S
      @Andrew--S Месяц назад

      @@Snappypantsdance Dating today is nothing like 25 years ago.