Rob Delaney on grief and the loss of his son Henry - The Russell Howard Hour
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- Опубликовано: 17 янв 2019
- Russell sits down to chat with the BAFTA winning star of Catastrophe, comedian and actor Rob Delaney about grief and the loss of his son Henry.
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Russell's interview technique is excellent. No matter what the subject is or who the guest is he asks the question and lets the guest answer it fully with no interruptions. I applaud Rob's strength here. No parent should face that.
I agree. Very well put
@@mazmoin5544 Thank you. Other presenters should take note. It helps with the natural flow of the interview.
Spot-on Mag, spot-on..
He has interrupted Delaney many times
@@francaperotti5934 Compared to other TV presenters he's not that bad though. Some guests barely get 2 words and the TV presenter starts talking over them.
I know it sounds weird, but I feel honoured to listen to Rob when he speaks about Henry.
Not weird :)
Not weird at all. I feel much the same.
me too RIP Henry
Nirvana Sanctuary But you don’t feel that way about everyone only these celebrities that feel s loss in their life is far more important than anyone else. So yes it’s weird you feel that way.
Nirvana Sanctuary I don’t think it’s strange at all. His experience has a sacredness to it, and he allowed us to have a glimpse into some of the terrifying and precious moments he holds in his heart.
I love his openness, he doesn't do the typical thing of putting a brave face on, it's fucking unfair and he says so and doesn't care if people think he's self pitying. This is healthy grief. And the way he talks about his son's eyes is one of the most beautiful things I've ever heard in my life. God bless him.
Life is amazing. It's a privilege to be alive as a human. And to have other humans who love you to bits? If that's the case, your stardust is literally beyond one in a trillion in this universe.
Greg D That’s just perfect. What an amazing thought xx
emilyharwood89 You wrote my thoughts, I sobbed most of the way though this video. It’s sad but he was just amazing and how Russell didn’t just burst and hug him is beyond me. I just can’t.... :’(
Maybe you/anyone with symptoms should look into heavy metals being an underlying issue, as a lot of chronic health issues is often caused by mercury toxicity. I would really recommend anyone struggling look into the Andrew Cutler Protocol. This is the ONLY safe protocol to this date, eating things like chlorella and cilantro has made people very very sick. Please read the child recovering stories by googling «cutler success stories child» and adult here «cutler success stories adult» . And I would really recommend reading the book "The Mercury Detoxification Manual: A Guide to Mercury Chelation" By Andrew Hall Cutler, Phd, PE and Rebecca Rust Lee. But the best place to learn and get support is trough the Facebook group «Andy Cutler Chelation: Safe Mercury and Heavy Metal Detox». But whatever you do, never take/eat cilantro, chlorella, MSM, glutathione, and ALA/DMPS/DMSA that is not according to the Andrew Cutler Protocol, you can read some peoples horror stories by googling «Andy Cutler what not to do». Wish you all the best!
@@siriolsen7805 Who is this comment for? It doesn't seem to bear any relation to the video or the thread!
This is such a moving thing to watch. It's also a great example of positive masculinity.
Zee Buzz Yes!
wtf doz that even mean what kinda of man wouldnt react in this way u know some fuck up people
@@stevecooper1824 way to reiterate my point dumb ass any man thus its not good its the lest ud expect for a real human character. iv now idea wtf u think ment but like the original post i think it says more about ur views on men then reality
@@ridanann There are PLENTY of men who wouldn't react this way. in the movie Manchester by the Sea, the story depends on the fact that men tend to close off when something bad happens.
@@bee4590 consider this 1 is a move likely feeding bs sterotypes an the other is a real human being talking in front of u. the original post is condescending af if u want man to feel dont act like its rare.
As a grieving father, thank you Rob Delaney for this poignant reflection. I connected with everything you said as I remember my lost, loved Joseph.
Same here.
As a grieving mother , exactly the same here
I'm so terribly sorry each of you suffered such tremendous loss. Grief is an exquisite entity-- oddly comforting, despite being a somewhat hollow representation of boundless love. Although a deeply unwelcome interloper, grief becomes as familiar as one's own skin.
Loss rips a chasm in the soul which we then slowly fill with love, regret, laughter, anger, tenderness, bitterness, & finally, begrudging acceptance.
We can & should frequent that cavernous shrine yet resist the desire to set up permanent residence.
I fervently hope each of you finds comfort in treasured memories & ultimately, acceptance.
rrbaggett7 alright calm down you’re not ghandi
So sorry for you loss
This is one of the most raw, poignant, and heartbreaking interviews I’ve ever watched. Thank you for being willing to share your pain in hopes of helping others who might be going through something similar.
Absolutely what I wanted to say
"Grief is the price we pay for love" - Rowan Williams
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
Fuck 😞
Damn you 😭😭😭😭😭
Wow that beautiful.
His dream of his late son leaving message to baby brother in their mother's womb. I just can't...
Summer Sunnyville amazing, such a beautiful dream.
Yeahh I managed to get through most of this, but that part broke the dam ;-;
Havent gotten to that part yet. But this comment made me tear up.
Props to the audience as well for being quiet at the right times...
"And now when I hold my other children, I feel - I physically feel - that they are like, stardust that has temporarily assembled into human form, and will one day disassemble and become something else."
Nothing like earth-shattering loss to really hone in on what is important in the world.
I wasnt prepared for this video when i clicked on it.
Curtis Metcalf me neither..
Curtis Metcalf I'm currently holding my son and refusing to let go!! My heart just hurts.
Same
E Po wish I could hold mine but they are too far away.
Im in a tube right now and just barely holding my tears back
Shout out to My Nigerian Aunties out there , being fully expressive of their emotions
There should be no stigma to grief, or mental health really.
I lost my cousin (we are a very close family) eight years ago to mugging (he was stabbed in the heart )and I'm still not right. I never recovered from that. The unexpected death of someone close to you will change you forever... Rest in peace brother
@@theouerthi I liked your comment out of solidarity. I know it must look weird in your notifications.
@@captainhoratiobungleiii7147 thank you it's alright I understand... it's nice to feel acknowledged.
going home I'm sorry for your loss. I'm always reminded of this quote "It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all". It is unfair that you lost him so soon, but like Rob said hopefully one day you'll be able to think of him and it won't bring you sadness, only joy that you've known even if was for a short amount of time.
Shoutout to his wife, she must have suffered so much
Very impressed by Rob Delaney.
He is incredibly good at simply talking - his voice is warm and relaxing, and he sounds like he actually means every single word he says, which makes them even more meaningful. Then you look at what he is talking about, and it is unbelievable he can be so composed for the whole time. So much respect to him.
I have been dealing with grief too, but even if I am doing relatively fine now, I would never be able to be so open about it.
There is no recipe for how to face grief, everybody has to find their own way, but having somebody like Rob sharing his story and feelings is going to be an incentive for all of us to keep going. We can all do it.
Thank you Rob.
Beautiful words from you. I lost my son the same way as Rob. I also share my grief with people. I would be so happy if someone would say this things to me. Where I come from people are not good in talking about things like these and they are always quiet or say an extremely stupid thing.
This is so god damn good. Not only Rob Delaney being able to speak openly about this subject but also how excellent Russel Howard is as an interviewer.
"He was so fun to be with." That's such a raw sentiment even though it seems so simple.
This should be shown to all the internet trolls who attack "celebrities" online with nasty comments because they think they know them. I had seen Delaney's tv show and saw him in Deadpool 2 and thought what a great year he was having and what a funny guy he was, but I had no idea about his personal life and what he was going through until now. Everyone has problems, big and small, that we don't know anything about, so maybe think about that before you decide to attack some one just because you didn't like their movie, tv show or song. Thank you Rob for sharing and I'm so sorry you and your family have to go through this. Thank you Russell for a great interview.
stardust comment is just profound esp coming from Rob. do feel sad for his sons passing. but really nice he try to help others with their grieving
Still remember fun we had on the ward Henry! Still thinking of you sweet lil boy. Hugs from a student nurse
I really appreciated this! It really hit home for me.
I lost my brother last September to suicide. It was a few (hot) days before he was discovered. My father, who volunteers as an emt, was able to hold his hand as they zipped him into the bag. I can't even imagine what that was like for him. My city wouldn't even do the autopsy because of the level of decay, they had to send him to the capital. It was a no casket funeral...
One of the hardest parts for me is dealing with other people. In part because I hate the "idk what I'd do if I lost my sibling." It feels selfish. Like, this isn't about you!...but then I feel selfish...yes, I know I should be in counseling.
I have dealt with loss before, my mother, a decade earlier. But that was illness, I had expected it for 16 years....plenty of time to come to terms....prepare myself, as it were...
If it's someone who knew him, I can jump to a funny story. But I'm lost when it's someone who never knew him. All I can think is "it's ok, it was his choice."
So, hearing a healthier take on this warmed my heart. I have to be more patient with them and take the opportunity to tell them about my genius brother! Who taught me algebra before I knew my times tables. Who taught me to use and maintain my computer. Who taught me game strategy. Who had to be told twice not to start fires inside buildings... Who retired at 40 and started a home business selling board games. My brother who taught me to love my inner geek! My brother, who will never be able to say "I'm so glad I'm here."
Sorry to hear about your loss. Its never easy dealing with these things and there's no shame in grieving properly and crying when you need to, and talking about it whenever you want to. It took me a long time to get over my father's death and it always felt like everyone else just wanted to get on with their lives whereas I couldn't stop crying and thinking about him. It can help to speak to trained people as well who can give you the time to air how you feel. Hope this helps in some small way.
I relate to so much of this. Thanks for wording what I couldn't.
Thank you for sharing this and sorry for your loss. I lost a family member to suicide and something that helped was someone pointing out that it is no different to dying from a physical disease. I have had suicidal feelings and they were absolutely right, your brain is not functioning normally. I don't know if that is in any way comforting to you, but I hope it is. Counselling is great. I sometimes think it should be mandatory for everyone!
Sorry to hear that, I lost my brother to suicide as well. It was over a decade ago, and now as an adult it's nice to be able to just remember what a cool person he was. At the time all you can really think about is the suicide when you think about them. For years we just didn't really talk about him because it was too painful, and it's nice that that's different now. The pain it causes your family is not really possible to describe but in the end he experienced a lot, he left a huge impression on the world and it's so much better for his life to have happened the way that it did than for it to have never happened at all. And when you're removed from having any control over the situation that ends up being the only way you can look at it really. I wish I was older so I could have been there for him but I wasn't & nothing will change that. I think once you accept that it's easier because you can remember the good with the bad & not just feel shame and guilt.
Much love to you xxx
I'm glad Russell let him speak so candidly about this. That's the unspoken thing here. Rob could have just come on and sold his TV show or whatever, but they obviously agreed to talk about his feelings about the son that he lost. Qudos.
Genuine tears streaming down my face. I can empathise with Rob; I lost my brother to cancer six years ago, it was his birthday on Monday and I miss him like mad everyday.
Sorry for your loss.
I don't know how anyone could dislike this video.
Trolls gunna troll
I think they might be disliking the subject matter and what poor Rob is going through, rather than ‘disliking’ the video as such. I hope that’s the case anyway.
@@candyhiggins20 That's a logical and insightful reply. On RUclips, which almost never happens
Unfortunatelly I experienced the exact same thing as Rob. I was crying so much when listenning and I completely understand and feel everything he said. My boy passed away a year ago from neuroblastoma, he was 3 years and 5 months old. He was fighting for one year and 5 months.
He loved halloween and christmas.
I miss you and love you my boy forever!
Polona I’m so sorry for your loss
Polona I am so sad that you lost your beautiful boy. How wonderful that his sweet soul landed with a mama who cared for him and loves him and cherishes his memory.
What a powerful interview. I can feel the absolute love he has and had for his son and the absolute pain he is in now.
“I think the saddest people always try their hardest to make people happy because they know what it’s like to feel absolutely worthless and they don’t want anyone else to feel like that.” - Robin Williams
Rob strikes me as someone with this mindset. It's something I see a lot with comedians :(
Agreed. Grief and witty, comedic, "no fs given" observations seem to go hand in hand. Something about grief, about "experiencing what's behind the veil," allows you to let go and not care about norms or decorum anymore and just say what needs to be said.
I know this love pain Rob carries, I tragically lost my adored 20yr old son, Kyle, 18 months ago.
I’m incredibly inspired and proud of him for speaking so honestly about how deep this pain is, how he kept himself together is admirable.
His dream that Henry left the new sibling a message is so intense in beauty...it will take your breath. God Bless Henry...& his beautiful family💙
I’ve always found Rob to be absolutely hilarious, but Christ do I have a new level of respect for him after watching that interview.
as a father.... this broke me
The Slow Swimmers Band me too - these things are horrible no matter who you are but as a parent it just seems to hit you tenfold
Thank you for this interview. I lost my beautiful 20 year old daughter two years ago. Rob you so eloquently described the feelings of grief. Even though we are all on our own grief journey, I have learned that there are so many commonalities for grieving parents. I am so sorry for the loss of your precious Henry. Thank-you for sharing your grief so openly.
Tania Whelan so sorry for your loss
She was my age damn so young sorry for ur loss
Those we love don't go away,
they walk beside us every day.
Unseen, unheard, but always near,
still loved, still missed and very dear.......
The insights that Rob Delany shares are truly profound, and man, kudos to Russell Howard for handling a tough subject brilliantly and allowing him to speak. Wow.
“Even if Beatrice worked at pizza express”. Apparently she went there at least once with her father
This interviewer is amazing! If this interview was done on American Television it would have been conpletly ruined!
Well now I don't think I'm ever going to stop crying
I am amazed how well Rob is able to articulate his grief....and this Russell Howard guy - what a fantastic interviewer.
I like how the interviewer isn't being rude and too personal, like not pushing it like most interviewers. Got my respect from a guy from
Canada.
I just had to hug my little brother and feel his warmth.
Hearing Rob talk about his children, especially Henry, made me feel slightly uncomfortable at first. But it's just that level of love is so rarely spoken about. I love the way he sort of looks off to the side, he's not saying it to anyone, he just has to say it abd it's beautiful. It takes a brave soul to bare themselves like that. Stunning sir, stunning.
Rob giving others permission to talk about their grief in the way that he does is the most powerful expression of emotions about loss I have seen. He must be applauded for doing this and helping others when he is clearly so grief-stricken himself. What a lovely dad he is.
Absolutely stupendous video! Kudos to Russell for conducting one of the most considerate and caring interviews I’ve ever seen. Kudos to Rob for having the strength to open up his personal world and pain to the whole world and telling it like it is!
I've been awake about 5 minutes, made a bowl of cereal, popped youtube on and I. AM. BAWLING. This beautiful beautiful man, god bless you and your family.
What kind of cereal?
This man is so much stronger than he believes he is.
His mannerisms talking about his son are so beautiful. Literally has me welling up.
Fan of these two as comedians and entertainers, but never really was too fussed with Russell's interviewing abilities. He has outdone himself and he has converted me. What an excellent and honest conversation. Wishing them both success and happiness in the future.
Watched this with my newborn sleeping on my chest. What a wonderful Dad. 😭
This should basically be required viewing for anyone's significant loss.
Grief is evidence that you have loved.
The sheer strength to articulate this immense grief without breaking down, to me, is superhuman. What a strong man he is. Beautiful and useful for everyone. Thanks for a glimpse into genuine strength of heart.
I liked the bit where Rob was talking tenderly about the death of his son and Wish played their shitty jingle and tried to sell me stuff.
That's just heart breaking. Wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy.
This man is still deeply hurting and covers it with comedy. As a father and human, that also covers his pain with comedy - this genuinely brought me to tears. I wish I could embrace this guy and give him love.
we never stop hurting.
The message in the womb only Henry could know... oh my goodness I don't know if I've ever heard anything as beautiful and tragic... so sorry this happened to you Rob, and all the grieving parents out there... love and light to you all
I usually avoid sad things, but for some reason this video was really beautiful and captivating
Pure love..."words mean nothing"
Everyone needs to be be able to express their grief like this, hats off to Mr Delaney for speaking in such an open, honest way and to Russell Howard for letting him talk, powerful stuff
Rob is very eloquent, I appreciate his speaking out about his experience with grief and love, this is so beautiful
This is heartbreaking but I found myself smiling the whole way through, especially when he was taking about Henry’s hair ❤️
Thank you so much Rob. I can't begin to understand how hard it was for you to talk to Russell about Henry in such a public forum. It has to be one of the most incredibly touching moments I have ever seen on television. All my love. Phil x
He shows the most real and honest expression of grief. Even comedy can be a magnificent tool for healing.
The feeling like a complete alien thing, that's exactly right. My dad passed when I was 9 and that feeling is the real kicker. All loss hurts, but even when it dims it's strange how life-adjacent you continue to feel.
9:53 this is so spot on. I wish everyone knew this. Friends would always apologise for mentioning the person but I feel sader when they don't as feels like everyone's forgotten about them except me
I am at 4 years after losing my 31-year-old son (suicide) and this is so true. The worst thing a parent can go through after losing a child is thinking people forgot him because no one will speak about him. I get it, it is hard to talk about and you don't want to upset the parent, but we are already upset and talking about our children helps even when it hurts.
I am amazed at his quiet strength, I strive to be there one day.
This really does make you realise how fragile life is....I can’t even imagine how Rob is so easily able to just convey his emotions without breaking down....I’d be a mess
Thank you for this Rob. 3 years today since I lost my daughter. I didn't have to chance to meet her, she was stillborn, but you summed up everything I have felt since then so much better than I could.
My girl is 4 months off being 3 I cannot comprehend her not being around she is the light of the world, the happiness and silliness and love of existence. This interview is so incredible Rob is powerful in his grief and love and vocalising emotions and Russell being a comedian interviewing on such a serious subject with respect and love.
Men sharing their vulnerability is everything the world needs.
Russell is one of the best interviewers - he lets his guests talk and answer everything as fully as they want. Rob Delany's raw discussion of grief was incredible and touching, and he's such a good role model for men who feel they can't express their emotions without being well received. And the veil he discusses - its one of the big things I noted with my depression from a few years ago (from grief as well) that you see the "real world". Hit home.
Oh this interview is one of the better things on the internet. So sorry he had to go through this, AND so grateful he chose to share so vulnerably. What a hero.
Absolutely heartbreaking 😞 I don't know how Russell got through without being an emotional mess, I know I couldn't have done it. Rest in peace little one x
Very very sad news about his son
Its not really " news" is it. It happened a year ago
I'm surprised that he didn't break down in tears, if i had been through that i would have not lasted.
Toby Smith after the period of shock you learn to accept it, there’s no more tears left.
Super off topic but Tobi Smith is my sisters name. Everyone assumes she's a guy and spells it like you with a y.
It depends what stage of grief he's at. You don't always cry talking about death. My dad and step mum died within 3 weeks of each other at the end of last year and I've not really cried yet, I tell people about it and don't cry, everybody reacts differently to grief, there's no set pattern, no 'proper' way to grieve.
Wow. This was not the interview I thought it would be. Profoundly heartbreaking.
He is so eloquent about his grief that it is therapeutic. Wish him and his family all the happiness in the world.
Holy shit this was powerful, I was glued to his every word, I hope it helps people going through a similar thing. Well done Rob x
thank you for this i am a grieving father whom is struggling with the fact of losing my son Tyler in Aug 17, Your words are so uplifting my heart go's out to you and your family i feel your pain and understand that horrible side of life happens but as i have learned they will always live within us but thank you for your words its nice but not knowing that i am not along in the grieving we feel in our lose of a child
These are the kind of interviews people need to see. They’re real and could really help someone.
This is great! This. Is the definition of courage, humility and authenticity! Thank you Russel and Rob for helping us navigating around grief and how to stay by people who grief! ;)
Beautiful. What a brilliant Dad and an exceptional man.
I love that every comment I have read on here is positive. I hope Rob Delaney continues to get more of a platform for his honesty, eloquent insight and compassion. A powerful role model, sorely needed by so many.
I come back and watch this sometimes. What a strong man, I hope he finds peace one day
I watched this interview with tears in my eyes, i can’t imagine the level of pain and grief this man has been through. To see him being so positive today is a great message to all people who have suffered a loss in their lives.
What a strong man. Speaks from the heart ❤️
My 2 sons died in 2011 in the same MVA that involved my whole family. It was sudden and devastating. I could listen to you and UNDERSTAND what you're trying to convey. It meant a lot to me. Thank you.
I’m breaking down ... wow. The authenticity and emotion and grief in every word ... oh man
wow, that was painful and beautiful at the same time
I wish everyone could watch this. Phenomenal honesty and wisdom.
This made my heart sore/soar
His love for his child is beautiful. I wish to have his strength and grace.
This is honestly the best interview I've ever seen. His approach to life after losing his child is so beautiful, and has changed the way I view losing a loved one. I'm so glad I got to see this. Thank you.
Please don't tell me I've grieved enough and I need to move on.
I'm not TRYING to stay in this hole of grief. But I'm missing a part of my soul because the landscape of my life has changed. The mountain that was my child has been leveled and excavated away. Just let me be angry and robbed and bitter on some days and on others let me be happy without making me feel bad for laughing at a joke because I promise, my child is still in the front of my head but sharing the laugh. Grief doesn't have an expiration date. It ebbs and flows. Someday I'm not a bitter, angry shrew and then on other days seeing the orange Gerber daisies makes me sob in the grocery because it was her favorite. Grief is like a stalker, you never know when it's going to come out of the shadows and level you.
Thank you to Rob for sharing his story. His book is amazing and I cried and raged and laughed because it was so honest and he understands. So thank you so much!
Bookmarked this.
I now know where to come when my little, simple life feels shitty.
My eyes are leaking everywhere!!!.
HE'S SO RIGHT THERE ARE NO WORDS
Why did I go on youtube tonight? Why did I enter in "Rob Delaney"? Why is anything? This horrible thing happened so Mr. Delaney could talk and show us the depth that love can go, how strong we can be, to look at people differently. Tragedy is coming for all of us. Nobody can really escape it, but we can help each other. Thanks for speaking so beautifully, and filling this whole room and turning everyone's room who watched this, into love. We ALL care. We are all a little more on touch with what is really real, and what matters now. I wish you even more strength and blessing and love if you ever need it, Mr. Delaney. Thanks you so much.
The world is fucked up when you hear a loving father talk about his loved baby son like Rob just did…. Oh my word…. Absolutely heartbreaking… stay strong…. He is stardust again 😢
I have a huge lump in my throat as I listen to this
My chest is also hurting too. Gosh I find the pain unimaginable.
I just watched this, even though 5 years ago, and I'm absolutely wrecked. This hits so differently when you have a son. Rob is such a kickass individual to be able to share something so horrendous and yet talk candidly. I seriously applaud this guy for laying it all out there. Catastrophe was such an awesome show too.
A brilliant and a very powerful interview. Rob is a brilliant actor/comedian and after seeing this very emotional interview a true great father and human being. I for one just hugged my 3 sons tight and told them that I loved them. An inspirational video for those so unforunate to have lost a loved one.
My cousin died aged 6 from leukemia in 1971 and my Uncle and Auntie have never forgotten or fully gotten over it. He had a younger brother and twin sisters in-utero(my cousins) and every year, on the anniversary of his death, they post a remembrance on Facebook.
One of the best interviews Ive ever listened too..
This is just so incredibly powerful. It's almost too much to watch. I'm grateful for this.