This does unironically reflect some of the workings behind linguistical translations; and brings to light the fact we may not even understand the cave paintings the cavemen left behind - despite perhaps knowing part of the real truth. A surprisingly well written shitpost.
I mean we know what the graphiti in Pompei says and most of it is quite literally just just shitposting. God only knows what the cavemen were trying to depict.
Our ancestors figured out how to make paint out of birdshit while they were waiting out the winter one time, so Ugg Bog the artist started painting on the walls to impress the cave-bitches, he painted pictures of his friends with exaggerated facial features and no muscles to roast them, they all had many laughs, and he got laid that night, it was a great success! A hundred thousand years later some drunk victoran english archeologist finds it on a field trip like "by jove! what exuisite artistry by these primitives! i say! they mustve been truly honouring their primitive monkeyman gods by spending all this effort to depict them, when they ought to have been out hunting and gathering for supplies, as thats all they couldve ever had time for in the days before canned foods and muskets! Look at this ones features- it has barely any muscles and greatly exaggerated facial features, my god, could this be the earliest depiction of the plains peoples rain god!? Great scott!"
4chan appears to be a network of secretive assassin priests in service to Internet. We have discovered evidence, miraculously surviving to this day, of correspondence between two "4channers" (their shibboleth, as it was not used by others who were not indoctrinated into their priesthood). The correspondence in question, seems to indicate that the vast majority of 4channers were unable to identify each other, thus also providing protection from those who would hunt them down. We were sadly not able to discover any missions the 4channers may have embarked upon, but what can one expect from such an organisation, if not complete and utter secrecy? Perhaps more evidence can be uncovered in the future of this hidden network, but perhaps they may stay as merely a silent threat to the Anglos, who presumably were sent to assassinate those who had sinned in the eyes of Internet.
"the cult which was a seperation of the main religion had some of the main ideals in mind but was much more accursed or as the anglos called it skibidi and was considered the ohio of the internet realm and was only for the ones with nothing"
I’m afraid I don’t actually recognize the original statement that he’s making this philosophical sounding message about. The “a handsome man with shapely buttocks can steal food unpunished” isn’t ringing any bells for me. And neither is “sigma gyatt fanum tax” or however it’s reworded when he speaks of it. Can someone help me please
Imagine being a historian in 3023 and discovering countless texts used by missionaries attempting to convince people into worshiping their obscure fertility goddess "Vaporeon"
In an animated documentary series from the late 20th century, we've only captured fragments of, chronicling the life of a Japanese teenage hero named Ash Ketchum. We are introduced to an ethereal water spirit that takes the shape of the now extinct felis catus but of a blue tinge with aquatic features of some kind of fish and the back ridges of a crocodylidae. In ancient archival conversations between supposed fedora-wearing cult members that roamed the vast planes of the internet, called the "neckbeards". There was a fascination between these societal outcasts about 'smashing' the water spirit, possibly due to the connotations that the water spirit may be a form of idolatry that goes against their cult beliefs. Though in other circles, it is said by others of the neckbeard cult that there is compatibility for copulation between the water spirit and humankind. This latter assessment seems unlikely due to the fact that no fossils have yet to be discovered of the Vaporeon species and what we have gathered is derived from anecdotal evidence from the animated documentary. The neckbeards believed that its water-based anatomy and the fact that humans and Vaporeons are from the same egg group would make reproduction possible, but by all accounts, humans in the 21st century as far as we know did not lay eggs. Though further studies may be necessary to verify this claim, humans may prove to be inherently different from humans today in 3023 and could in fact lay eggs may be due to the onset of global warming conditions or radiation from the aftermath of the Third World War. If Vaporeons were proved to be water-based then human insemination would also prove fruitless given the dilution of said sperm into the orifice of these creatures. It seems to be the neckbeards may just be infatuated by lewd images drawn by artists of this age of the Vaporeon species in the same vein as the few remaining pieces of adult-themed material we've gathered of a feminine green humanoid resembling that of a rose, and a feminine brown humanoid resembling that of a leporidae that seemingly were also featured deities from the aforementioned animated documentary. These images all stem from some archaic law that the neckbeards hold dear, called Rule 34. Apparently a thousand years ago, Rule 34 was a dictate for the internet in which vulgar art would be created for the entertainment of the neckbeards, even if that means debasing public figures and deities in shameless acts, many of said images even portrayed the hero Ash Ketchum committing zoophilia. Further research must also be conducted to determine if humankind were zoophilic during this time period or if this was degenerate behavior only applicable to the neckbeards. What can be concluded is that humankind was at a psychological tipping point and degeneracy may have been an underlying cause for the subsequent great decline of the species in the 21st century. - Excerpt from "A Comprehensive Study on the Legends of Vaporeon, Ash Ketchum, and Rule 34 in the Early 21st Century" (3023) by Dr. Daeseong Kim, PhD in Internet Historiography & Digital Anthropology
@@NotDr.Evil137 Newer fragments discovered have identified some similar late anglo phrases such as "I'm out" and "It's been nice knowing ya" These phrases seem to indicate a significant period of life where the late Anglo people's seemed to become self aware and obtain a level of transcendence that culminated in the highest possible good they could accomplish in life, and was known to be a common last phrase before they marched like warriors into valhalla, taking their own future in their hands after contributing their glorious accomplishments to their god, the internet.
I like how the entirety of the English speaking world was obliterated with only relics remaining, but ancient Greek is still a thing that scholars use.
@@nightsong81 Maybe the English speakers were the "sigma gyatts" all along and the rest of the world were the ones that actually worshipped Internet, and they wrote the poem in the Anglo tongue to mock them for their heresy.
To be fair greeks sculpted stuff in stone and stone lasts very long. If one day human life as we know ends it will likelly be impossible to recover digital data.
Strangely, I come away from this interpreting "Sigma Ohio Skibidi" to mean "Those who break the moral codes of society are condemned to a life of hardship and spiritual separation." Interesting.
@@e5858 To be fair I only understand like 3 parts of it being “Ohio” “sigma” “rizzler” I think rizzler is hilarious because it definitely has some sorta entomology with onceler (the tumblr smexy man) Which to me makes sense because the onceler was literally synonymous with smexy, and rizz means like to talk up and such. So rizzler to me has some roots in 2010s tumblr, despite it being completely unrelated. Idk
When the researcher interpreted the "It's all Ohio?" Meme as the Anglo recognizing their whole civilization to be lost or cursed, that legit sent chills down my spine, and what's better, is that he's not completely wrong... Damn, Real Life has much richer lore than anything we'll ever get from AAA games before and after it all became corporate focused
@@patheticbeastsbut games lore are made with the express purpose to be made with deep meaning. Meant to have tales to learn from. Reality isn’t, it simply happens. And as many have said, “the story would be completely ridiculous, impossible even if not for it being reality. It actually happened.” We are doomed.
Now that you mentioned it, I want minininuteman to watch this whole thing and part 1 of this and give his own opinion on the possibility that we might have misinterpreted stuff from the past.
This is so well written! The linguist gets everything wrong at first, then retells a parable with the wrong words (btw i think the parable is an earlier story seen on Burial Goods, posted just a few days ago) and then somehow gets the message right, or at least makes a very serious and solid conclusion from it all.
It's not a new idea. But yes. "The wicked flee when no man pursueth: but the righteous are bold as a lion." - Proverbs 28:1 " Whoso walketh uprightly shall be saved: but he that is perverse in his ways shall fall at once." - Proverbs 28:18
Weirdly enough it’s true as well. I’ve done some bad stuff as a kid, and lived in fear of being discovered. Even for simple lies to stealing candy or something.
Or that a dangerous and often-shunned cult tried to reject their humanity, thusly associating themselves with idealized creatures and spirits with humanoid charactheristics
'Hystywryaeans of 5843 trygthryeng ta deikript mwandewrn Aenglisc aens Ithkuil aens konklusing ta teyd meadw ddraoi' -Dhylvwryttyn eyn ta 4324 ywr o anwr Ceteotzin Gongtongzhu y Gwledig.
Indeed, I have seen several fragmentary inscriptions bearing the question “It’s all Ohio?”, but in a few cases it seems there was a set response to this, a catechism of the Internet cult. The response is “Always has been”, this seems to indicate a widespread sense of societal alienation during the last days of Anglo civilisation, such that they would say their society has always been dark and cursed. This is an area which requires much greater study, as it offers a potential glimpse into Anglo views outside of the Internet orthodoxy which largely dominates our few written sources.
And it's not so incorrect eh? We've always been fighting each other as long as the world's been churning... Or "I need more boolets gyatt Ohio Skibidi"
I love how the definitions of the words and the "tale" while obviously not correct, are not entirely wrong either. Even when the culture is so far removed and all meaning lost, the over-the-top interpretations have a surprising amount of truth in them.
The funny thing is, ancient humans were shitposters just as we are now. There are tons of penis drawings and funny messages inscribed on walls. Most of them were: "___ was here" but there were other creative ones like this one viking message that was high up that literally said "this is high." Even cavemen used to make these wooden figures with enormous breasts and bottoms.
it is plausible that we, as humans may have misinterpreted ancient texts not knowing their full context as sacred when in reality they might have been used for another purpose entirely. this is a very interesting thought though, loving this series
ruclips.net/user/shortselxVmZNkjhY?si=CrU8ILZ1IWu1gd3- Forensically, it's probable that "traditionally", Bards were the ones who succeeded in the extremely unclean and physically-intensive task of kinslaying and "won a Mario-style power-up" (by having created an opportunity for themselves to become successful by sticking to their goals and focusing on proper nutrition, an opportunity which they had never HAD) for having done so. Then, they would have become theoretically capable of having an "actual" linguistic conversation with the mother of their children, as well as [dedicating their lives to] becoming the best detective in all the land by consciously pushing "forensics-centricism" "into 'discussions' about science". So in that way, The People [whose only means to communicate to each other was through the verbatim use of the words of Bards] were really non-Hun (AND non-Hun-marrying) practitioners of Trotskyism whose "'War' Deterrent" was that they were Too Traditional To Make A Sequence Of Words In Order To Form Any New "Phrase" Until A Bard Did It For Them. By the way, this nonsense is still continuing today among people who are referred to as "terrorists" and also by "Hebrews" (but everyone already knows that "Hebrews" Are That Way because of Gutenberg's "Contribution to Forensics"). Most of you are Rembrandt deniers as well, which is really funny considering that Japan is better at doing that stuff, and you don't even know where your "organization is based". So why did non-Pagan words suddenly get interpreted differently than the magical words of bards which were previously the only phrases which they used in order to communicate to one another? You know, MANY people today are interpreting such "non-pagan" texts as if they're just more of their own clan's bards. (And they're the subgroup of anti-China people who are called "terrorists" nowadays)
@@robinrehlinghaus1944 forest was considered sacred in many pagan religions. The Hunn hordes had a culture of sustainability and preserving the environment. We lost it all to time and are doomed to make the ecological disasters over and over
I love the idea of a group of solemn historians finding a bunch of insane tictok teens dancing and talking about rizz or whatever as the historians try to focus closely on what the kids are saying.
A reminder that there's still a giant block of limestone with every 9gag meme carved into it sitting underground somewhere in the Spanish desert. I fear for when our civilization comes to ruin and the internet goes down with us, this unholy block of cringe will be our most memorable legacy to future races. That is both hilarious and horrifying.
One of the best parts of this is the conflation between "Alpha" as in "Alpha male" and "Alpha" as in "generation Alpha". Two terms that have little to actually do with each other, yet use the same word to refer to different groups of people. With the original context lost, they use the word in the only way they understand thanks to surviving references. As with any good archeology-related shitpost, this highlights how little we can confidently say about our distant past, even as comparitively little as a thousand years ago. For every event known there are many that remain as mysteries, and the well-known contexts of the time fade first, because why would anyone write them down? Everybody knows them. And those ancient cultures wrote in stone. We store the majority of our records and information in a medium that is inaccessible within a couple decades, or rendered inoperable should an EMP hit (such as a solar flare).
Yeah this is like a Chinese History Textbook situation where it just says like ten thousand dead, three hundred eaten, overwhelming Han Victory. While its kind of hard to explain 5000 years of history, what really stops these from deeply recorded and such is just as what you say nobody bothers to writes it down as everybody knows it.
“Brainrot” a supposed plague sent down unto sinners their god deemed to those who deserved such a cruel fate. The process to gain such “brainrot” is unknown, but knowing it exists the Space Overlords have called all to be careful in the ruins. For fear of releasing the plague once more. We suspect that the person inflected would have their brain decay while still alive, leading to unimaginable suffering. We do not yet know what happened when the brain completely rotted as we are still delving into ruins and the ancient texts. Space Overlords require our brains to be scanned after each return, to check for any signs of decay and if so they are to be quarantined. We can not risk the Ire of a long dead god.
God, I don't know how but this is just *chef's kiss*. It fills a linguistic/archeological speculation hole in my life that I didn't know I had, but it's even better than the real thing because it is hilarious and completely devoid of the background dread of "what if this is way off the mark and we're missing some key piece of context?" We KNOW it's way off the mark (because we have all the context) and that's what makes it so good imo.
@@nightsong81 might you perhaps be the author of this journal? I was scouring the personal databases for archival of more personal findings, and I chanced upon a public playlist. I say to you, truly, that you are a man of high scholarship. May I implore your interpretation of this most ancient of ciphers, as to finally reveal deep mystery behind the religious fanaticism of the Late Anglo period? Pray tell, what could this possibly mean? "Begome Ordodog :-DD" For other ambitious uncoverers of esoteric cultures, I humbly request you to join me in furthering this delve into the divine cosmic mystery that our friend has only begun to put work into. We must strike while the iron is hot, so to speak. Do not let our compatriot's pioneering work be relagated to rumors and murmurs of maids and merchants. Who was this reclusive sage known by "Seraphim Rose" ? And of this wizard of renown, "Spyridon Bailey" ? I have only heard faint, distant echoes of these names. However, I do not know whether I have it in me to dare seek any further. The discovery of such a extended mystical corpus confounded me at first, but then, with time and understanding, shook me to my very core. The realization dawned in me as it became clear: I fear not the inexistence of the god they worship. Rather, I tremble at the thought of the existence of such a transcendent Being.
So, I'm a historian and anthropologists. Like, just got my bachelor's and am about to get my master's. This is, ironically, both incredibly accurate and completely inaccurate. It's a very accurate depiction of attempting to work only off a single source, but an inaccurate representation of contextual analysis. The mix works in favor of this poor historian in some places, and they get the ability to create some pretty solid analysis from it, but a good historian would always look for the next piece of evidence to cross-reference instead of jumping straight to their conclusions. Overall, 8/10. Sigma Ohio skibidi indeed.
For the first time I can now say that I'm proud to be of this culture even if it is a joke of misinterpretations of a hyperbolized condemnation of the youngest generation.
I'm glad I wasn't the only person who walked away from this video with a feeling of pride. I wasn't totally unhappy with the culture, per se - but this video brought perspective to even the most banal corners of our modern-day existence. And in doing so, it helped me feel at peace with them. Even the apparently meaningless parts of our society are filled with meaning and conviction, even if we don't see it. That makes me realize that the world can't be as empty as it feels sometimes. And that gives me hope for the future.
@@Drekromancer You wanna find meaning in the most banal corners of the world? Go look at the past - wartime, economic downturns, medical conditions, periods of extreme uncertainty - then go back to the present, or to the life of the most suffering person you know, and look in the eye at anyone who says, "X is pointless", and compare. If those people back then can make this comparison, we all can. We owe it to our predecessors.
As a post-apocolypse author this makes me smile from ear to ear, unironically get inspiration from these videos despite how silly the context of them is.
I had no idea what "fanum tax" actually was, and as far as I can tell, it's really just a niche expression. But I like its inclusion here with more commonly known memes/expressions. A single device could be filled with extremely niche references and, without having many other writings to compare it to, be given as much significance as the other words found within.
Dude, I never thought of it that way. I had never heard of "Fanum Tax" either. I only recognized "Rizz" in "Rizzler" (and a clever nod to "Batman"), "Ohio", and "Skibidi". I love that interpretation.
Fanum tax originated from Kai Cenat's friend, Fanum that just barges into his room to take a bit of his food. That's it. There are also Fanum tax returns, deductions, evasions, and exemptions.
I can only imagine what the historians will think what the “Backrooms” and the “Trollge” were if they ever found out about them in anciet documents, great video
Imagine, we go through this effort to translate text, figuring out these shapes thinking its ancient wording to tell the future of some alien source code stuff... Then it turns out to just be memes and s-posts some dorks in the equivalent of college were making for a project and a laugh.
This worldbuilding is incredible, so well thought out using actual religious texts for inspiration. I love the idea that future archeologists see the internet as our god, because it’s true in a way. I also love interpreting “gyatt” as the shortened name of some goddess of beautiful figure. It perhaps gives some perspective on how we could be getting actual old cultures wrong based solely on their artifacts. We don’t have the whole picture, we never will because it is lost to time. The ancient Egyptians could’ve had their own “skibidi Ohio” but we’ve interpreted it as something more serious. I have hope that life will arise from the ashes of Earth far past our near-extinction, and that they will be appalled by our language and culture. Perhaps a paper like this will in fact be written some day trying to explain our odd ways. Edit: okay I just watched the first part, and while the idea of an alien interpreting all this makes more sense, I think future humans trying to interpret the lives of their ancestors, our lives, is a very interesting take. The lives we live now are so alien in comparison to the lives of most humans in history, we might as well be aliens to the more primitive humans that will live in the future, after the dust has settled post our near-extinction. I also love the idea that our current era is very close to the end, and people dying with their phones clutched in hand is a very realistic scenario.
I remember sitting in class about art history and the professor was explaining how ancient humans believed that by painting animals on caves, they were bringing the animal into the cave quite literally. And im sitting here thinking... or they just liked painting animals? It cant really have this highly spiritual implication, right? They just liked painting animals to excersize their brains or tell stories?
@@beyondobscure Xenofiction. Motel of the Mysteries, A Canticle for Liebowitz, By the Waters of Babylon, and Body Rituals of the Nacirema are prominent examples
historians in the future are either gonna have too little information (like here) or so much information (in the cases that the archives are preserved) that it would take centuries to go through everything. as a bonus, we have s significant chance of Rick Rolling them or blasting there speakers with the most ear-renching music ever. they could also come across various specifics like Touhou and its literal thousands of derivative works, and chances are some of those derivative works would still be considered entertaining. I can imagine the leader of some future civilization setting U.N. Owen Was Her as a national anthem..
reminded me of that one mission in fallout NV where the Brotherhood is trying to decipher an archive and they just get a computer virus on their whole system
A lot of internet stuff from the 90s and early 2000s are already lost. I lean far more towards the former than latter being the likely future in regards to the preservation of knowledge that isn't in the interest of corporations and governments to "preserve".
@@MoreEvilThanYahweh preserving internet material is a larger concern RN that in 2000, but it costs a lot to buy these hard drives. Tape storage will allow entire exabytes of data to be put inside small rooms
Our current age is digital so that crimes of the occult elite (the ones who run the evil cult that is essentially the primary power on earth right now) can easily erase all evidence of their countless crimes against humanity after either completion or failure and vanish into the shadows again. Surf the Kali Yuga, and never forget what they took from you.
@@MoreEvilThanYahweh in fact it’s probably in their best interest for the former to happen and to tell a sanitized and filtered version of History to the public. Hm… *wait a moment.*
can we talk about the beginning of the poem? it’s the ones who have lived a thousand years who say that life is short, and it’s the fast ones-presumably the ones who throw life away-that say life is thrown away. this isn’t just a deep interpretation of a shitpost. this is ART.
Seeing someone make such deep and philosophical from gutter tier meme speak, makes me feel better about both our own archeology, and the archeology of future generations. Asuming the human race survives the climate apocalypse: there's gonna be some inexplicable shit to interpret, and maybe it's better they derive MORE meaning from what was, than assuming it meant nothing.
I mean, it was, but the English language expression of this idea is charged with a sense of mockery, and perhaps even ridicule, that would not have been found in it's Roman counterpart.
I honestly hope for more of this as an analysis of how we speak today (if in a slightly joking manner) is interesting in more ways than I think I could say right now.
You know this made me think. The ruins of our civilization won't be anything like those of the past. Imagine the future archeologists finding massive server farms and just assuming they are temples to some god
You know, this raises a genuinely interesting question. What if, like this eccentric hyperbolic "future archeologists" portrayed in the video, current day archeologists also interpreted most things they saw on ancient relics in a way that's biased towards higher thinking and hidden messages? We subconsciously wanted the relics we found to make sense, so we pulled imaginary strings from other relics that was found previously, and made imaginary guesses on what they are supposed to be. Unless they are strictly familiar (e.g: portrayal of animals, people, carts, etc), we wouldn't ever interpret them as mere mundane items that are just "in fashion" back in the day. Ten thousand years from now, archeologists would be severely confused by the purpose of colourful glass marbles that can be found in every civilization from the entire globe, not knowing they're used for merely either decoration or simple games. Perhaps this is indeed what happened with the Roman Dodecahedron, that we're putting too much thought in what are simply toys.
FINALLY, SOMEONE EXPLAINED "GYATT". I heard that one and it made no sense to me. I knew "Rizz", but I never heard "Rizzler", though I like the "Batman" allusion.
@@ashaler__ fanum tax is referring to a streamers friend, who whenever he sees food essentially just takes a portion of it. It's essentially a food tax from this person. Fanum tax doesn't just refer to food at this point, however.
As soon as I heard "holy text," I knew exactly where this was going. I know it's a shitpost, but I love thought experiments like this. They should read this to people as they get their degree in archeology. It'd probably humble a lot of them.
"Internet, their all knowing god..." Dang, this is a documentary 😮💨 This is fantastic! I've often wondered how our age will be perceived and skewed by future archeology, much like we have undoubtedly done to those of our past.
I'm not chronically online enough/ devoted to lord Internet enough to get what "works" he's referencing if any at all. This is basically me trying to keep up withy my little brother However after observing this channel and watch the other videos in the series this makes sense. This is gold.
I'm not going to lie, the way "Sigma" is explained makes it a lot relatable and realistic. More understandable, considering I kinda depend on the expectations and satisfaction of others, I bodybuild and chase my goals, not for myself, but for others.
Imagine finding out that you've been frozen 1000 years in to the futre and have to stand in front of a room of historians and tell them that they've wastes their lives *_-the ceo of 💀_*
This is genuinely beautiful and helps to show how great wisdom was cultivated in the past: we can take even unintended lessons from poetry or stories or even circumstances and use that to better ourselves and live more moral lives.
I think this is an extremely interesting take on future historians, however, 1000 years from now is too soon. For a culture as prominent as the English speaking world it would take 2500 years at the minimum for them to become so unfamiliar.
True, but you are forgetting the secret ingredient. The society these future English-speaking humans study is in total ruins and no longer exists in any measure. The few remnants they have are mostly cell phones and such. If English had no way to tether itself to the past and dictionaries did not exist, then people who speak it would be the only authority on it, and that authority would be spread orally. It would evolve after that from THAT base, not the thousands of years and linguistic intermixings that we have in our language. For example, in RL, even an old man could identify that "Rizz" means "charisma", but these scientists did not even recognize that etymology. The context and even the syllable are used exactly the same as "charisma", and yet the word " charisma" does not exist in their vocabulary at all. That implies that the people who survived the disappearance had very simple English vocabularies.
Given how little Hollywood understands about life 100 or frequently even 50 years ago - what people actually considered hardships or wanted out of life - I bet it won't take that long at all.
The black obelisk knew all. It was served by strange birds from New Zealand, who lived in a farm much hated by the Anglo, under the leadership of a drooling canine, the Hound of X-Xod.
Even if they knew "yolo" stands for "you only live once", they'd still think similar things. "The Anglos must have believed there is no afterlife or reincarnation. It is quite a depressing message."
Ohio as many historical texts describe, as mythical settlement located somewhere in the northern parts of American wasteland continent. Some texts refer to it as populated metropoly, tho it is uncertain how people can live in this inhospitable and quite dangerous territory. On the other hand there aare other texts that also refered to other parts of the wastelland as "Ohio" Which make us to suggest that name Ohio is not a tangible physical entinty but more of metaphorical concept of eternal torture and damnation, also known as......... Hell.
The main reason we know that some art and text from more recent millenia were comedic in a sort of memetic sense is that the language and culture are well understood and somewhat relatable, i.e. the slander and public jokes in Pompeian graffiti and other clearly comedic imagery. There are so many things from time periods with so little context we think were of great importance that could have been the result of long running joke formats and we would never know. Like the "Dog walks into a bar" joke may have been hilarious to the Sumerians but we just don't have the contetand even if we did, the joke would lose it's punch.
There's a lot to dissect from this video. One thing I've learned is that humanity could be so severely misunderstood 100+ years from now. It's kind of frightening, honestly.
Yeah i think thats the point: future historians/anthropologists may misinterpret our current day society the same way current day society could misinterpret aspects of ancient society. An example is archeologists finding an odd item and thinking it served ceremonial/ritualistic purposes when in reality it may have been just a fancy child's toy.
This is absolutely beautiful. Great parody piece but also a commentary on the disconnect between our interpretations of the past and the lived reality of past people. Our grasp on what life was like in ancient times is so tenuous and this fact is rarely acknowledged by the mainstream. People think what we know of Rome, for example, is exactly true and right for the most part, but we will never have even close to the full picture.
God the thought occured to me that What if we resurrected a person of a lost culture and showed them what stories of theirs we reconstructed and they would just go: "Oh no THATS what survived?!" "Oh its incorrect. " "Totally wrong yupp." "Oh WOW you actually really improved upon it, thanks!"
This is great, even more Motel of Mysteries vibes than the last one. I think I'm officially getting old though, as I am unfamiliar with many of these terms. Happens to everyone eventually I guess
I usually don’t like to read, but I sometimes listen to stories and I have to say, if this was a book I would binge read that sh$t. All I can say is To the narrator: awesome job To the author: please make more, I’m awestruck! Great job to the both of you. If you read this like the vid and sub because he deserves it.
I love the idea that they think that we based our society around godhood, and how we were polythiestic, just like what we think of ancient greece. The fact that their is a loop of knowledge is really cool, hope to see more of this.
With each revelation found within the Alpha fragment, my thirst for knowledge grew exponentially. I became consumed by the desire to unlock more of the anglo culture's secrets, to piece together the puzzle of their civilization. Every day brought new discoveries, a symphony of words and meanings resonating through my mind. While my fellow researchers marveled at the glimpses we had into their linguistic heritage, I delved even deeper, immersing myself in the anglo narratives that these words wove. I envisioned the anglo heroes, fueled by the spirit of Yolo, venturing into untamed lands, defying death in pursuit of glory. I could almost hear their battle cries and feel their adrenaline coursing through my veins. Their vibrant tales came alive, fueled by the force of Yeet, as these anglo figures propelled themselves towards daring feats. The word embodied their courage, their unyielding pursuit of victory, leaving behind a trail of triumphant moments that defied the boundaries of time. The myth of the Rizzler captured my imagination, its enigmatic allure entwined in the fabric of anglo folklore. I painted mental pictures of this captivating figure, their mystique drawing in unsuspecting souls. The Rizzler became a symbol of the mesmerizing power inherent in beauty, a concept that transcended generations and cultures. Gach, with its dual nature as an ode to physical beauty and an oath, fascinated me. I pondered the anglos' belief that attractiveness held a divine significance, intertwining it with their expressions of devotion. It painted a picture of a society that worshipped not only gods but also the physical forms they inhabited. The connection I uncovered between "Phantom Tax" and modern language became a revelation in itself. It entrenched the realization that language exists as a living entity, evolving over time while retaining traces of its ancient origins. It was as if the anglos seized fragments of their culture and wove them into the tapestry of English, leaving us breadcrumbs to tread upon their historical footsteps. Sigma, the archetype of the nonconformist, ignited a fire within me. I yearned to understand their renegade spirits, to envision the anglos who dared to challenge the status quo. Through their eyes, I glimpsed a society where idiosyncrasy thrived, where individuality was a precious trait, and conformity was mere shackles begging to be broken. Ohio, though still a riddle awaiting unraveling, held a hauntingly captivating allure. It beckoned me like a siren's call, promising to reveal the anglos' innermost fears and struggles. I could almost taste the bitterness of their decline, the weight of their uncertainties and curses, urging me onwards to uncover the truth hidden within its enigmatic name. As the team's research intensified, the Alpha fragment began to breathe, pulsating with the lifeblood of an ancient civilization. We meticulously examined each word, each phrase, savoring the revelations they unveiled. In our pursuit, I not only felt a connection to the anglos but also to my fellow researchers, bound together by a shared sense of awe and wonder. The Alpha fragment had become more than a mere artifact. It was a portal to a bygone era, granting us a intimate glimpse into a world long buried by time. Through our tireless efforts, we honored the anglos' legacy, piecing together the fragments of their culture and preserving it for future generations. As I immersed myself in the linguistic tapestry of Alpha, a profound truth dawned upon me-I was not just decoding words, but unearthing the essence of human existence. The anglos, with their stories and expressions, provided a mirror through which I could reflect upon our shared humanity and the enduring nature of the human experience.
Imagine if one person from all walks of life, jobs, nationalitys and professions(e.g. engineering, physics, historians and popular figures) were to somehow appear in front of the speaker and explain the real meanings of all slang, memes and knowledge that we know it would be curious to see how the speaker reacts to it or about the truly evil people like Hitler etc
I wish people would treat our present with the respect historians have for the past. I mean - the above 'assumptions' aren't really incorrect. They merely mystify our lives in an exciting way. Have we not made new gods and rituals? People, embrace the magic!
Gyat dam the rizzler Skibidi foshizzler. Maker of the fanum tax Put us on the runback Sent me to the shadow realm Ohio got me overwhelmed. But the Alphas on they grindset Master Sigma Mindset Yeet yeet skeet skeet skibidi dop dop dop yes yes.
5] And a voice from the sky spoke to the obelisk 6] (and the voices words appeared on the surface of it in shining, golden letters) which said: 7] "A NEW HAND TOUCHES THE BEACON"
One thing that I keep remembering while watching this is that there actual surviving "shitposting" that's from Pompeii before its destruction, there are walls filled with graffiti and vandalization from the time and contain messages and drawing not to dissimilar from today normal social media, stuff like people celebrating with their friends, cartoonish drawings of local authority figures and rude imagery that are clearly just jokes to name a few. We've been at this for millennia, now we just have better technology to record our intrusive thoughts and a larger possible audience, but the spirit is the same, and it probably have always been and will always be the same. Great video, these high-quality jokes are always welcome.
Your voice is gold, listening to this reminded me a lot of some of Lovecraft´s audiobooks i´ve listened to, mainly the Mountains of Madness - you know, poking around in mysterious ancient ruins and such. Really good listen.
Part 1:
ruclips.net/video/TTcJtW45fIw/видео.html
The "Alpha Fragment":
ruclips.net/video/NddZoebtSsI/видео.html
The alpha fragment lmao
Is this technically speculative history fiction?
6:15 what is this paragraph refering to?
imagine if he finds out the 9gag buried stone obelisk
pls make more
This does unironically reflect some of the workings behind linguistical translations; and brings to light the fact we may not even understand the cave paintings the cavemen left behind - despite perhaps knowing part of the real truth.
A surprisingly well written shitpost.
I mean we know what the graphiti in Pompei says and most of it is quite literally just just shitposting. God only knows what the cavemen were trying to depict.
this is in no manner a shitpost- rather, a world built out of them. even memes decompose, and give way to new life
Our ancestors figured out how to make paint out of birdshit while they were waiting out the winter one time, so Ugg Bog the artist started painting on the walls to impress the cave-bitches, he painted pictures of his friends with exaggerated facial features and no muscles to roast them, they all had many laughs, and he got laid that night, it was a great success!
A hundred thousand years later some drunk victoran english archeologist finds it on a field trip like "by jove! what exuisite artistry by these primitives! i say! they mustve been truly honouring their primitive monkeyman gods by spending all this effort to depict them, when they ought to have been out hunting and gathering for supplies, as thats all they couldve ever had time for in the days before canned foods and muskets!
Look at this ones features- it has barely any muscles and greatly exaggerated facial features, my god, could this be the earliest depiction of the plains peoples rain god!? Great scott!"
We know what the cave drawings say.
A lot of them are genuine shitposts.
The more things change, the more they stay the same.
isn't that up there with "3+ thousand years ago, Egyptians were doing paleo/archeology on even older stuff"?
Historians in 3023 finding out what “4chan” was, and the horrific priests which it carried
4chan appears to be a network of secretive assassin priests in service to Internet.
We have discovered evidence, miraculously surviving to this day, of correspondence between two "4channers" (their shibboleth, as it was not used by others who were not indoctrinated into their priesthood). The correspondence in question, seems to indicate that the vast majority of 4channers were unable to identify each other, thus also providing protection from those who would hunt them down.
We were sadly not able to discover any missions the 4channers may have embarked upon, but what can one expect from such an organisation, if not complete and utter secrecy?
Perhaps more evidence can be uncovered in the future of this hidden network, but perhaps they may stay as merely a silent threat to the Anglos, who presumably were sent to assassinate those who had sinned in the eyes of Internet.
Ancient myth cycles found in strange occult circles from prehistory do say that false ones were betrayed by an unearthly glow suffusing their bodies.
"this text seems to suggest that 4chan was a powerful hacker, or a god of hacking"
"the cult which was a seperation of the main religion had some of the main ideals in mind but was much more accursed or as the anglos called it skibidi and was considered the ohio of the internet realm and was only for the ones with nothing"
A god of mischief and a vile trickster.
I think it’s funny how he took a completely nonsensical statement and spun it into a very grounded and coherent message
And an actually admirable piece of philosophy
The collective unconscious works in mysterious ways.
I’m afraid I don’t actually recognize the original statement that he’s making this philosophical sounding message about. The “a handsome man with shapely buttocks can steal food unpunished” isn’t ringing any bells for me. And neither is “sigma gyatt fanum tax” or however it’s reworded when he speaks of it. Can someone help me please
@@silentwolfarena9935 Follow the second link in the pinned comment. That will take you to the Alpha fragment.
@@silentwolfarena9935sticking out your gyatt for the rizzler
Imagine being a historian in 3023 and discovering countless texts used by missionaries attempting to convince people into worshiping their obscure fertility goddess "Vaporeon"
I can't believe that didn't make the final cut. Somebody get Vaporeon in there!
Did you know that in terms of
@@athos9293 shut.
Smash, next question
In an animated documentary series from the late 20th century, we've only captured fragments of, chronicling the life of a Japanese teenage hero named Ash Ketchum. We are introduced to an ethereal water spirit that takes the shape of the now extinct felis catus but of a blue tinge with aquatic features of some kind of fish and the back ridges of a crocodylidae. In ancient archival conversations between supposed fedora-wearing cult members that roamed the vast planes of the internet, called the "neckbeards". There was a fascination between these societal outcasts about 'smashing' the water spirit, possibly due to the connotations that the water spirit may be a form of idolatry that goes against their cult beliefs. Though in other circles, it is said by others of the neckbeard cult that there is compatibility for copulation between the water spirit and humankind. This latter assessment seems unlikely due to the fact that no fossils have yet to be discovered of the Vaporeon species and what we have gathered is derived from anecdotal evidence from the animated documentary. The neckbeards believed that its water-based anatomy and the fact that humans and Vaporeons are from the same egg group would make reproduction possible, but by all accounts, humans in the 21st century as far as we know did not lay eggs. Though further studies may be necessary to verify this claim, humans may prove to be inherently different from humans today in 3023 and could in fact lay eggs may be due to the onset of global warming conditions or radiation from the aftermath of the Third World War. If Vaporeons were proved to be water-based then human insemination would also prove fruitless given the dilution of said sperm into the orifice of these creatures. It seems to be the neckbeards may just be infatuated by lewd images drawn by artists of this age of the Vaporeon species in the same vein as the few remaining pieces of adult-themed material we've gathered of a feminine green humanoid resembling that of a rose, and a feminine brown humanoid resembling that of a leporidae that seemingly were also featured deities from the aforementioned animated documentary. These images all stem from some archaic law that the neckbeards hold dear, called Rule 34. Apparently a thousand years ago, Rule 34 was a dictate for the internet in which vulgar art would be created for the entertainment of the neckbeards, even if that means debasing public figures and deities in shameless acts, many of said images even portrayed the hero Ash Ketchum committing zoophilia. Further research must also be conducted to determine if humankind were zoophilic during this time period or if this was degenerate behavior only applicable to the neckbeards. What can be concluded is that humankind was at a psychological tipping point and degeneracy may have been an underlying cause for the subsequent great decline of the species in the 21st century.
- Excerpt from "A Comprehensive Study on the Legends of Vaporeon, Ash Ketchum, and Rule 34 in the Early 21st Century" (3023) by Dr. Daeseong Kim, PhD in Internet Historiography & Digital Anthropology
. . . Did I just read a piece of fucking philosophy derived from the words "rizzler gyatt fanum tax, sigma ohio skibidi."
humor made a full circle of evolution
Well, it's been a good run but I'm out 😑 It can't get any worse (starts chugging bleach)
Yessir!
We found meaning in gibberish
@@NotDr.Evil137
Newer fragments discovered have identified some similar late anglo phrases such as "I'm out" and "It's been nice knowing ya"
These phrases seem to indicate a significant period of life where the late Anglo people's seemed to become self aware and obtain a level of transcendence that culminated in the highest possible good they could accomplish in life, and was known to be a common last phrase before they marched like warriors into valhalla, taking their own future in their hands after contributing their glorious accomplishments to their god, the internet.
This man somehow wrote an entire archaeological mockumentary from near-untranslatable Gen Alpha slang. That’s honestly extremely impressive.
Nice
Written mockhmentaries are a new favorite of kine
Bfb fan detect
in discord, nonetheless
I like how the entirety of the English speaking world was obliterated with only relics remaining, but ancient Greek is still a thing that scholars use.
I think you're the first to notice that and comment on it. Very good catch.
@@nightsong81 Maybe the English speakers were the "sigma gyatts" all along and the rest of the world were the ones that actually worshipped Internet, and they wrote the poem in the Anglo tongue to mock them for their heresy.
I mean, Greece probably won't get nuked when ww3 starts unlike most english speaking countries so there is an actual lore reason
We're probably gonna carry forth ancient languages for a long time but leave behind the corpus of contemporary languages.
To be fair greeks sculpted stuff in stone and stone lasts very long.
If one day human life as we know ends it will likelly be impossible to recover digital data.
Strangely, I come away from this interpreting "Sigma Ohio Skibidi" to mean "Those who break the moral codes of society are condemned to a life of hardship and spiritual separation." Interesting.
I actually genuinely agree with you ❤😂🎉
+2 and confirm.
"Those who break the moral codes of society are condemned to a life in Ohio."
@@BENOTAFRAID689and skibidi
*A HANDSOME MAN WITH A SHAPELY BUTTOCKS CAN STEAL FOOD UNPUNISHED, BUT A CAREFREE MAN OUTSIDE THE LAW IS CURSED TO STRANGE PLACES AND CANNOT REST.*
Or in modern English, “Gyatt rizzler fanum tax sigma Ohio skibidi”
We should send another golden disk into space with only that written on it.
@@TheHarrisontemple
Based. I'm down with that!
@@e5858 To be fair I only understand like 3 parts of it being “Ohio” “sigma” “rizzler”
I think rizzler is hilarious because it definitely has some sorta entomology with onceler (the tumblr smexy man)
Which to me makes sense because the onceler was literally synonymous with smexy, and rizz means like to talk up and such.
So rizzler to me has some roots in 2010s tumblr, despite it being completely unrelated.
Idk
preach! preach!
When the researcher interpreted the "It's all Ohio?" Meme as the Anglo recognizing their whole civilization to be lost or cursed, that legit sent chills down my spine, and what's better, is that he's not completely wrong...
Damn, Real Life has much richer lore than anything we'll ever get from AAA games before and after it all became corporate focused
no shit Sherlock of course real life has better lore than video games omfg
@@patheticbeastsbut games lore are made with the express purpose to be made with deep meaning. Meant to have tales to learn from.
Reality isn’t, it simply happens. And as many have said, “the story would be completely ridiculous, impossible even if not for it being reality. It actually happened.”
We are doomed.
Real life lore tends to be more wild than people give it credit.
Bruh, stop making sweeping generalizations about AAA games. Elden Ring is AAA, ffs.
@@patheticbeastsCalm down lmao, you're acting like a child.
Remember people, as miniminuteman said before, "for ritualistic purposes" is archeologist for "we have have no f*cking idea what it's used for"
Sex is kind of a ritual
A lot of religious artifacts were just dildos and fap material that contemporary archeologist weren’t willing to acknowledge for what they were
@@gramferoI mean. You're not wrong.
Now that you mentioned it, I want minininuteman to watch this whole thing and part 1 of this and give his own opinion on the possibility that we might have misinterpreted stuff from the past.
More like, it doesn't have a materially practical purpose.
"A handsome man with shapely buttocks can steal food unpunished." Truer words have never been spoken.
"rizzler gyat fannum tax" indeed
@@liam8370 you know that slang has gone too far when it gives you the option to translate to english.
This is so well written! The linguist gets everything wrong at first, then retells a parable with the wrong words (btw i think the parable is an earlier story seen on Burial Goods, posted just a few days ago) and then somehow gets the message right, or at least makes a very serious and solid conclusion from it all.
Well spotted! it's a reference to the 'RIZZLER GYATT FANUM TAX SIGMA OHIO SKIBIDI' video from a couple days ago
@@burialgoods I noticed the same thing.
@@burialgoodsreference to r-what??
@@___-qj2lx Link in desc. The Alpha Fragment.
@@burialgoods on god
The proposition that justice is brought upon the guilty by their own perpetual fear of discovery is actually really interesting
It's not a new idea. But yes.
"The wicked flee when no man pursueth: but the righteous are bold as a lion." - Proverbs 28:1
" Whoso walketh uprightly shall be saved: but he that is perverse in his ways shall fall at once." - Proverbs 28:18
Weirdly enough it’s true as well.
I’ve done some bad stuff as a kid, and lived in fear of being discovered. Even for simple lies to stealing candy or something.
I agree. "Sigma ohio skibidi, indeed" becomes great philosphy
Yes, that is the basis for Dostoyevsky's novel Crime and Punishment.
interestingly simple.
Historians in 3023 trying to decrypt tolkien elvish, klingon, etc. and concluding that anglos had met aliens
Or that a dangerous and often-shunned cult tried to reject their humanity, thusly associating themselves with idealized creatures and spirits with humanoid charactheristics
'Hystywryaeans of 5843 trygthryeng ta deikript mwandewrn Aenglisc aens Ithkuil aens konklusing ta teyd meadw ddraoi'
-Dhylvwryttyn eyn ta 4324 ywr o anwr Ceteotzin Gongtongzhu y Gwledig.
@@equilibrum999xɬɢʙɣɬʰɴnɥʙnsʔθɱɢɱɱɴnʝrɴɬjʙχɱʁfʀɱɴɱʙɣɬɣxɬ ɲθɡɱɣ ɡʙχʙʔθʁɬjʙxnɥʙɴʙɥɬʙχʙ ɥnʙɴ ʙθʁzjɻχɻ zʎɬjʰxʙxbɣɱɴθɬɥɴz ɬɣɱʀmɢpɴʙŋdrçɲɬsjɮ ɬ nxʙɭθxθɣtnʀɬɥɬʁɬxθɥfçbɥʙ l sxθɭθfɣfħmʀpŋbʙʂtʂdɲɬɥsɥzjzχθθħɣɮqθʙʝrħɬħɥ θʝ ðɭf ð ɻwɻvɻlðɥɮʁɮʝθɥθxθ fɥɬʝɬ ɬʝfʝ fɱxʙħsʔ
@@equilibrum999lmfao showoff.
Like some people who believe Sumerians met with aliens. (Anunakis)
Indeed, I have seen several fragmentary inscriptions bearing the question “It’s all Ohio?”, but in a few cases it seems there was a set response to this, a catechism of the Internet cult. The response is “Always has been”, this seems to indicate a widespread sense of societal alienation during the last days of Anglo civilisation, such that they would say their society has always been dark and cursed. This is an area which requires much greater study, as it offers a potential glimpse into Anglo views outside of the Internet orthodoxy which largely dominates our few written sources.
AHAHHAAHAHA GLORIOUS
And it's not so incorrect eh? We've always been fighting each other as long as the world's been churning...
Or
"I need more boolets gyatt Ohio Skibidi"
the delivery of "Sigma Ohio Skibidi, indeed" was amazing
I actually genuinely agree with you and ❤😂🎉
it took me until "skibidi" to realize this was called "alpha" because of gen alpha slang.
I love how the definitions of the words and the "tale" while obviously not correct, are not entirely wrong either. Even when the culture is so far removed and all meaning lost, the over-the-top interpretations have a surprising amount of truth in them.
"It's all Ohio?" Is meant as humor but the interpretation would be right on the money
The funny thing is, ancient humans were shitposters just as we are now. There are tons of penis drawings and funny messages inscribed on walls. Most of them were: "___ was here" but there were other creative ones like this one viking message that was high up that literally said "this is high." Even cavemen used to make these wooden figures with enormous breasts and bottoms.
Neat fact
it is plausible that we, as humans may have misinterpreted ancient texts not knowing their full context as sacred when in reality they might have been used for another purpose entirely. this is a very interesting thought though, loving this series
archaeologists whenever something doesn't make sense: slap "ritual" on it
On the other hand, things may have been considered sacred that don't mean much to us any more
ruclips.net/user/shortselxVmZNkjhY?si=CrU8ILZ1IWu1gd3-
Forensically, it's probable that "traditionally", Bards were the ones who succeeded in the extremely unclean and physically-intensive task of kinslaying and "won a Mario-style power-up" (by having created an opportunity for themselves to become successful by sticking to their goals and focusing on proper nutrition, an opportunity which they had never HAD) for having done so. Then, they would have become theoretically capable of having an "actual" linguistic conversation with the mother of their children, as well as [dedicating their lives to] becoming the best detective in all the land by consciously pushing "forensics-centricism" "into 'discussions' about science". So in that way, The People [whose only means to communicate to each other was through the verbatim use of the words of Bards] were really non-Hun (AND non-Hun-marrying) practitioners of Trotskyism whose "'War' Deterrent" was that they were Too Traditional To Make A Sequence Of Words In Order To Form Any New "Phrase" Until A Bard Did It For Them. By the way, this nonsense is still continuing today among people who are referred to as "terrorists" and also by "Hebrews" (but everyone already knows that "Hebrews" Are That Way because of Gutenberg's "Contribution to Forensics"). Most of you are Rembrandt deniers as well, which is really funny considering that Japan is better at doing that stuff, and you don't even know where your "organization is based".
So why did non-Pagan words suddenly get interpreted differently than the magical words of bards which were previously the only phrases which they used in order to communicate to one another? You know, MANY people today are interpreting such "non-pagan" texts as if they're just more of their own clan's bards. (And they're the subgroup of anti-China people who are called "terrorists" nowadays)
It's unlikely that we are anywhere near this bad
@@robinrehlinghaus1944 forest was considered sacred in many pagan religions. The Hunn hordes had a culture of sustainability and preserving the environment. We lost it all to time and are doomed to make the ecological disasters over and over
I love how this somehow makes an easy explanation of Gen Alpha terminology for Millennials and Boomers.
*Gen alpha terminology for all of the above
@@rafaelhines1178 noted. Comment edited.
I love the idea of a group of solemn historians finding a bunch of insane tictok teens dancing and talking about rizz or whatever as the historians try to focus closely on what the kids are saying.
Like, I can barely understand sometimes. And I keep up with the constant and wonderful change of language.
@@Popthebop Honestly, you're so real for that. I try my best, too - but it's a challenge to keep up. Now more than ever.
hell, i do that even now
Well,
Onfim's writings are a thing
They're gonna think Rick Astley is some sort of prophet that gives a form of music as a message between people called "Rickroll".
A reminder that there's still a giant block of limestone with every 9gag meme carved into it sitting underground somewhere in the Spanish desert. I fear for when our civilization comes to ruin and the internet goes down with us, this unholy block of cringe will be our most memorable legacy to future races. That is both hilarious and horrifying.
Is that a real thing?
@@balazsvarga1823 yes search for "9gag memestone"
@@balazsvarga1823yes
One of the best parts of this is the conflation between "Alpha" as in "Alpha male" and "Alpha" as in "generation Alpha". Two terms that have little to actually do with each other, yet use the same word to refer to different groups of people. With the original context lost, they use the word in the only way they understand thanks to surviving references.
As with any good archeology-related shitpost, this highlights how little we can confidently say about our distant past, even as comparitively little as a thousand years ago. For every event known there are many that remain as mysteries, and the well-known contexts of the time fade first, because why would anyone write them down? Everybody knows them. And those ancient cultures wrote in stone. We store the majority of our records and information in a medium that is inaccessible within a couple decades, or rendered inoperable should an EMP hit (such as a solar flare).
Thank you. I think you summarized a lot of what people seem to miss in this series.
Yeah this is like a Chinese History Textbook situation where it just says like ten thousand dead, three hundred eaten, overwhelming Han Victory. While its kind of hard to explain 5000 years of history, what really stops these from deeply recorded and such is just as what you say nobody bothers to writes it down as everybody knows it.
I didn't catch the conflation of the two alphas, that's neat
@@CeoMacNCheese Dam RIP to those 300 guys
"sigma ohio skibidi indeed" got me dead 🤣
Also, those descriptions of the words are the most metal descriptions I've ever heard
No way you turned gen Alpha brainrot into something this interesting. Bloody genius
There's no such thing as a bad prompt. There are only writers too scared to dream.
“Brainrot” a supposed plague sent down unto sinners their god deemed to those who deserved such a cruel fate.
The process to gain such “brainrot” is unknown, but knowing it exists the Space Overlords have called all to be careful in the ruins. For fear of releasing the plague once more.
We suspect that the person inflected would have their brain decay while still alive, leading to unimaginable suffering. We do not yet know what happened when the brain completely rotted as we are still delving into ruins and the ancient texts.
Space Overlords require our brains to be scanned after each return, to check for any signs of decay and if so they are to be quarantined.
We can not risk the Ire of a long dead god.
The method in the madness
300th like
You mean gen z
"Sigma Ohio Skibidi" indeed. (10:53)
God, I don't know how but this is just *chef's kiss*. It fills a linguistic/archeological speculation hole in my life that I didn't know I had, but it's even better than the real thing because it is hilarious and completely devoid of the background dread of "what if this is way off the mark and we're missing some key piece of context?"
We KNOW it's way off the mark (because we have all the context) and that's what makes it so good imo.
Did you see part 1? Because if you like this, you'll probably like that, too.
Yeah, I did. Didn't see the "Alpha Fragment" video until I read burialgoods' pinned comment though.
@@Eduard_Moraru Ah. Bit of a departure from the genre there, but I hope it was still enjoyable.
Yesss it's so good
@@nightsong81 might you perhaps be the author of this journal? I was scouring the personal databases for archival of more personal findings, and I chanced upon a public playlist. I say to you, truly, that you are a man of high scholarship.
May I implore your interpretation of this most ancient of ciphers, as to finally reveal deep mystery behind the religious fanaticism of the Late Anglo period?
Pray tell, what could this possibly mean?
"Begome Ordodog :-DD"
For other ambitious uncoverers of esoteric cultures, I humbly request you to join me in furthering this delve into the divine cosmic mystery that our friend has only begun to put work into. We must strike while the iron is hot, so to speak. Do not let our compatriot's pioneering work be relagated to rumors and murmurs of maids and merchants.
Who was this reclusive sage known by "Seraphim Rose" ?
And of this wizard of renown, "Spyridon Bailey" ?
I have only heard faint, distant echoes of these names. However, I do not know whether I have it in me to dare seek any further. The discovery of such a extended mystical corpus confounded me at first, but then, with time and understanding, shook me to my very core. The realization dawned in me as it became clear: I fear not the inexistence of the god they worship. Rather, I tremble at the thought of the existence of such a transcendent Being.
So, I'm a historian and anthropologists. Like, just got my bachelor's and am about to get my master's. This is, ironically, both incredibly accurate and completely inaccurate. It's a very accurate depiction of attempting to work only off a single source, but an inaccurate representation of contextual analysis. The mix works in favor of this poor historian in some places, and they get the ability to create some pretty solid analysis from it, but a good historian would always look for the next piece of evidence to cross-reference instead of jumping straight to their conclusions. Overall, 8/10. Sigma Ohio skibidi indeed.
Did you acquire your masters yet?
@@Bruh-tw8uh not yet! Still working on it
@@MathasiaJgl to you man
If we talked to someone from like Ancient Rome or something they would probably think we sound exactly like the guy in this video
For the first time I can now say that I'm proud to be of this culture even if it is a joke of misinterpretations of a hyperbolized condemnation of the youngest generation.
I'm glad I wasn't the only person who walked away from this video with a feeling of pride. I wasn't totally unhappy with the culture, per se - but this video brought perspective to even the most banal corners of our modern-day existence. And in doing so, it helped me feel at peace with them. Even the apparently meaningless parts of our society are filled with meaning and conviction, even if we don't see it. That makes me realize that the world can't be as empty as it feels sometimes. And that gives me hope for the future.
@@Drekromancer whimsical
@@Drekromancer You wanna find meaning in the most banal corners of the world? Go look at the past - wartime, economic downturns, medical conditions, periods of extreme uncertainty - then go back to the present, or to the life of the most suffering person you know, and look in the eye at anyone who says, "X is pointless", and compare. If those people back then can make this comparison, we all can. We owe it to our predecessors.
As a post-apocolypse author this makes me smile from ear to ear, unironically get inspiration from these videos despite how silly the context of them is.
I had no idea what "fanum tax" actually was, and as far as I can tell, it's really just a niche expression. But I like its inclusion here with more commonly known memes/expressions. A single device could be filled with extremely niche references and, without having many other writings to compare it to, be given as much significance as the other words found within.
Dude, I never thought of it that way. I had never heard of "Fanum Tax" either. I only recognized "Rizz" in "Rizzler" (and a clever nod to "Batman"), "Ohio", and "Skibidi". I love that interpretation.
Fanum tax originated from Kai Cenat's friend, Fanum that just barges into his room to take a bit of his food. That's it. There are also Fanum tax returns, deductions, evasions, and exemptions.
I thought it was "forum tax" which my brain somehow interpreted as an interchangeable form of "thread tax."
@@庫倫亞利克 finally, a tax that gets redditors to shut up
@@guy8248I like your funny words, magic man. But seriously, I have no idea who any of the mentioned people are and what exactly it is that they do
I can only imagine what the historians will think what the “Backrooms” and the “Trollge” were if they ever found out about them in anciet documents, great video
They would see them as descriptions and representations of the underworld
This makes me wonder how badly we may have misinterpreted ancient civilizations. What were the Egyptians and Incas REALLY up to?
Imagine, we go through this effort to translate text, figuring out these shapes thinking its ancient wording to tell the future of some alien source code stuff...
Then it turns out to just be memes and s-posts some dorks in the equivalent of college were making for a project and a laugh.
@@cronagorgon6435"Amenhotep was here" type of stuff
Maybe a "thoth" really was a highly complex communication network, much as the alleged deity Internet is today
I don't know about the Incas, but the Egyptians left libraries full of readable scrolls, so there's at least a lot of information to evaluate.
Hieroglyphs were the most elaborate shitposts of human history.
This worldbuilding is incredible, so well thought out using actual religious texts for inspiration. I love the idea that future archeologists see the internet as our god, because it’s true in a way. I also love interpreting “gyatt” as the shortened name of some goddess of beautiful figure. It perhaps gives some perspective on how we could be getting actual old cultures wrong based solely on their artifacts. We don’t have the whole picture, we never will because it is lost to time. The ancient Egyptians could’ve had their own “skibidi Ohio” but we’ve interpreted it as something more serious. I have hope that life will arise from the ashes of Earth far past our near-extinction, and that they will be appalled by our language and culture. Perhaps a paper like this will in fact be written some day trying to explain our odd ways.
Edit: okay I just watched the first part, and while the idea of an alien interpreting all this makes more sense, I think future humans trying to interpret the lives of their ancestors, our lives, is a very interesting take. The lives we live now are so alien in comparison to the lives of most humans in history, we might as well be aliens to the more primitive humans that will live in the future, after the dust has settled post our near-extinction. I also love the idea that our current era is very close to the end, and people dying with their phones clutched in hand is a very realistic scenario.
Another historical masterpiece for the decade to come
I remember sitting in class about art history and the professor was explaining how ancient humans believed that by painting animals on caves, they were bringing the animal into the cave quite literally. And im sitting here thinking... or they just liked painting animals? It cant really have this highly spiritual implication, right? They just liked painting animals to excersize their brains or tell stories?
i fucking love this genre of story
if anyone knows what htis genre is called or something like it let everyone here know it must be told
@@beyondobscure Xenofiction. Motel of the Mysteries, A Canticle for Liebowitz, By the Waters of Babylon, and Body Rituals of the Nacirema are prominent examples
Archaeology fiction? @@beyondobscure
yay@@Bacxaber
fr
1:21 - I like how *YOLO* is basically akin to an existential battle cry
historians in the future are either gonna have too little information (like here) or so much information (in the cases that the archives are preserved) that it would take centuries to go through everything. as a bonus, we have s significant chance of Rick Rolling them or blasting there speakers with the most ear-renching music ever.
they could also come across various specifics like Touhou and its literal thousands of derivative works, and chances are some of those derivative works would still be considered entertaining. I can imagine the leader of some future civilization setting U.N. Owen Was Her as a national anthem..
reminded me of that one mission in fallout NV where the Brotherhood is trying to decipher an archive and they just get a computer virus on their whole system
A lot of internet stuff from the 90s and early 2000s are already lost. I lean far more towards the former than latter being the likely future in regards to the preservation of knowledge that isn't in the interest of corporations and governments to "preserve".
@@MoreEvilThanYahweh preserving internet material is a larger concern RN that in 2000, but it costs a lot to buy these hard drives.
Tape storage will allow entire exabytes of data to be put inside small rooms
Our current age is digital so that crimes of the occult elite (the ones who run the evil cult that is essentially the primary power on earth right now) can easily erase all evidence of their countless crimes against humanity after either completion or failure and vanish into the shadows again.
Surf the Kali Yuga, and never forget what they took from you.
@@MoreEvilThanYahweh in fact it’s probably in their best interest for the former to happen and to tell a sanitized and filtered version of History to the public.
Hm… *wait a moment.*
can we talk about the beginning of the poem? it’s the ones who have lived a thousand years who say that life is short, and it’s the fast ones-presumably the ones who throw life away-that say life is thrown away. this isn’t just a deep interpretation of a shitpost. this is ART.
Anthropology like this always tells you more about the researcher's culture than about the subject's
Seeing someone make such deep and philosophical from gutter tier meme speak, makes me feel better about both our own archeology, and the archeology of future generations. Asuming the human race survives the climate apocalypse: there's gonna be some inexplicable shit to interpret, and maybe it's better they derive MORE meaning from what was, than assuming it meant nothing.
What you say to others reflects who you are.
I FUCKING STARTED ROLLING AT "Gyattam Dataz"
Now imagine them finding Voyager and other deep space artifacts and realizing that their very own translations might be wrong through the golden disks
the disk would most likely be translatable to them because it was written without any slang but instead, English
Why is the final message interpreted from such a nonsense sentence genuinely such a devout message that lines up perfectly with our world.
this has planted an idea in my head that "Alea iacta est" might have just been the roman's version of "Yolo"
That’s a good point!
I mean, it was, but the English language expression of this idea is charged with a sense of mockery, and perhaps even ridicule, that would not have been found in it's Roman counterpart.
The die has been cast
I mean, the translation here is basically "memento mori"
vivamus moriendum est
could def be defined as YOLO
This was freaking amazing. Also, frighteningly accurate when referring to internet as god. I think many people unwittingly worship it in that way.
I honestly hope for more of this as an analysis of how we speak today (if in a slightly joking manner) is interesting in more ways than I think I could say right now.
*manner *than
@@fuel-pcbox Fixed
@@JakobatHeart Dude stfu, I didn't even notice that they fixed their spelling.
You know this made me think. The ruins of our civilization won't be anything like those of the past. Imagine the future archeologists finding massive server farms and just assuming they are temples to some god
The newest season of Futurama is weird.
Can't wait to see how this continues!
Minor diety?
Clearly this person is unfamiliar with the true extent of the rizzler's power.
Genuinely learning about modern slangs here
Same. I only knew "Rizz", "Ohio", and "Skibidi" myself. What about you?
I knew... yolo and yeet :´ )
fanum tax the only one i didn't know lmao
@@-.-...---7
Apparently, "Fanum Tax" is actually very niche. The only people that use it are people that watch the guy's Tiktok skits.
I only know yolo and ohio, and I didnt even know ohio is a slang.
This made me think of skibidi toilet being the only remaining sign of human life
This is like getting the right answer with the wrong method
Failing upwards.
“Grandpa I don’t wanna hear about the sussy skibidi Ohio sigma that did the grimace shake challenge”
Thank you for this.
It finally makes sense.
I also double checked with my nephew.
It's accurate.
Honestly, surprisingly insightful for "sigma skibbi ohio"
You know, this raises a genuinely interesting question. What if, like this eccentric hyperbolic "future archeologists" portrayed in the video, current day archeologists also interpreted most things they saw on ancient relics in a way that's biased towards higher thinking and hidden messages? We subconsciously wanted the relics we found to make sense, so we pulled imaginary strings from other relics that was found previously, and made imaginary guesses on what they are supposed to be. Unless they are strictly familiar (e.g: portrayal of animals, people, carts, etc), we wouldn't ever interpret them as mere mundane items that are just "in fashion" back in the day.
Ten thousand years from now, archeologists would be severely confused by the purpose of colourful glass marbles that can be found in every civilization from the entire globe, not knowing they're used for merely either decoration or simple games. Perhaps this is indeed what happened with the Roman Dodecahedron, that we're putting too much thought in what are simply toys.
would unironically spend money to read a whole book series on this
I would unironicly read a book with this as it's plot
You can check out "A canticle for Liebowitz" for a less funny take on this concept
FINALLY, SOMEONE EXPLAINED "GYATT". I heard that one and it made no sense to me.
I knew "Rizz", but I never heard "Rizzler", though I like the "Batman" allusion.
Btw, the word you were looking for at the end was "allusion". Similar but very different
The truth is in elusion.
@@georgiykireev9678
Shoot. I know better than that. Thank you for pointing that out.
i still have little clue what "fanum tax" is, but this video is the first source that actually explained it
@@ashaler__ fanum tax is referring to a streamers friend, who whenever he sees food essentially just takes a portion of it. It's essentially a food tax from this person. Fanum tax doesn't just refer to food at this point, however.
As soon as I heard "holy text," I knew exactly where this was going.
I know it's a shitpost, but I love thought experiments like this. They should read this to people as they get their degree in archeology. It'd probably humble a lot of them.
“🤔👆is easier for a glizzy to pass through ohio uneaten, then for an alpha to enter pizza tower ong.”
Matpat 19 : 24
"Internet, their all knowing god..."
Dang, this is a documentary 😮💨
This is fantastic! I've often wondered how our age will be perceived and skewed by future archeology, much like we have undoubtedly done to those of our past.
I'm not chronically online enough/ devoted to lord Internet enough to get what "works" he's referencing if any at all. This is basically me trying to keep up withy my little brother
However after observing this channel and watch the other videos in the series this makes sense.
This is gold.
I'm not going to lie, the way "Sigma" is explained makes it a lot relatable and realistic. More understandable, considering I kinda depend on the expectations and satisfaction of others, I bodybuild and chase my goals, not for myself, but for others.
This is absolutely incredible I would pay to see a full documentary about this.
Absolutely incredible work.
Imagine finding out that you've been frozen 1000 years in to the futre and have to stand in front of a room of historians and tell them that they've wastes their lives
*_-the ceo of 💀_*
This is genuinely beautiful and helps to show how great wisdom was cultivated in the past: we can take even unintended lessons from poetry or stories or even circumstances and use that to better ourselves and live more moral lives.
A Rizzler’s Gyatt can fanum tax while a Sigma is Yeeted to Ohio
Writing this felt like my brain was leaking from my ears.
I think this is an extremely interesting take on future historians, however, 1000 years from now is too soon. For a culture as prominent as the English speaking world it would take 2500 years at the minimum for them to become so unfamiliar.
I think this is implying that the historians are part of an alien civilization that found a decimated humanity a thousand years from now.
True, but you are forgetting the secret ingredient. The society these future English-speaking humans study is in total ruins and no longer exists in any measure. The few remnants they have are mostly cell phones and such. If English had no way to tether itself to the past and dictionaries did not exist, then people who speak it would be the only authority on it, and that authority would be spread orally. It would evolve after that from THAT base, not the thousands of years and linguistic intermixings that we have in our language.
For example, in RL, even an old man could identify that "Rizz" means "charisma", but these scientists did not even recognize that etymology. The context and even the syllable are used exactly the same as "charisma", and yet the word " charisma" does not exist in their vocabulary at all. That implies that the people who survived the disappearance had very simple English vocabularies.
Given how little Hollywood understands about life 100 or frequently even 50 years ago - what people actually considered hardships or wanted out of life - I bet it won't take that long at all.
@@capability-snobin fairness there’s difference between academic and pop culture understanding.
Imagine future historian stumbling upon the SCP wiki.
subscribed because i watched part 1 and forgot the series existed lol
seriously a masterpiece, brethren
may the algorithm be with you
In regards to your first sentence: Same, lol
"may the algorithm be with you" could be mistaken for ai overlord or something
The black obelisk knew all. It was served by strange birds from New Zealand, who lived in a farm much hated by the Anglo, under the leadership of a drooling canine, the Hound of X-Xod.
Wow learning the etymology of “fanum” was a genuine revelation
Even if they knew "yolo" stands for "you only live once", they'd still think similar things.
"The Anglos must have believed there is no afterlife or reincarnation. It is quite a depressing message."
Ohio as many historical texts describe, as mythical settlement located somewhere in the northern parts of American wasteland continent. Some texts refer to it as populated metropoly, tho it is uncertain how people can live in this inhospitable and quite dangerous territory. On the other hand there aare other texts that also refered to other parts of the wastelland as "Ohio" Which make us to suggest that name Ohio is not a tangible physical entinty but more of metaphorical concept of eternal torture and damnation, also known as......... Hell.
I love the "A rizzler with a fat gyatt fanux tax, but a sigma ohio skibidi." So motivational 😭🙏
future historians may come across this in the future, which is probably gonna causes some SERIOUS confusion
The main reason we know that some art and text from more recent millenia were comedic in a sort of memetic sense is that the language and culture are well understood and somewhat relatable, i.e. the slander and public jokes in Pompeian graffiti and other clearly comedic imagery.
There are so many things from time periods with so little context we think were of great importance that could have been the result of long running joke formats and we would never know. Like the "Dog walks into a bar" joke may have been hilarious to the Sumerians but we just don't have the contetand even if we did, the joke would lose it's punch.
There's a lot to dissect from this video. One thing I've learned is that humanity could be so severely misunderstood 100+ years from now. It's kind of frightening, honestly.
Ah yes, 2023+100=3023
Math indeed.
@@Dis_Dis My point still stands.
@@fogsster The same way a person with crutches can stand. Just barely.
Yeah i think thats the point: future historians/anthropologists may misinterpret our current day society the same way current day society could misinterpret aspects of ancient society. An example is archeologists finding an odd item and thinking it served ceremonial/ritualistic purposes when in reality it may have been just a fancy child's toy.
This is absolutely beautiful. Great parody piece but also a commentary on the disconnect between our interpretations of the past and the lived reality of past people. Our grasp on what life was like in ancient times is so tenuous and this fact is rarely acknowledged by the mainstream. People think what we know of Rome, for example, is exactly true and right for the most part, but we will never have even close to the full picture.
God the thought occured to me that
What if we resurrected a person of a lost culture and showed them what stories of theirs we reconstructed and they would just go:
"Oh no THATS what survived?!"
"Oh its incorrect. "
"Totally wrong yupp."
"Oh WOW you actually really improved upon it, thanks!"
I genuenly NEED this historian's interpretation of all of the "amogus" shit that went on some years ago
This is great, even more Motel of Mysteries vibes than the last one.
I think I'm officially getting old though, as I am unfamiliar with many of these terms. Happens to everyone eventually I guess
You and me both buddy
@@burialgoodsI really like this, good shit
gyatt, fanum tax, and skibibi toilet are all sub-culture things more than sources of mainstream entertainment, if that helps at all.
I usually don’t like to read, but I sometimes listen to stories and I have to say, if this was a book I would binge read that sh$t. All I can say is
To the narrator: awesome job
To the author: please make more, I’m awestruck!
Great job to the both of you. If you read this like the vid and sub because he deserves it.
More will probably be made eventually, as inspiration arrives. Check out part 1 and the "Alpha Fragment" if you haven't yet!
I love the idea that they think that we based our society around godhood, and how we were polythiestic, just like what we think of ancient greece. The fact that their is a loop of knowledge is really cool, hope to see more of this.
With each revelation found within the Alpha fragment, my thirst for knowledge grew exponentially. I became consumed by the desire to unlock more of the anglo culture's secrets, to piece together the puzzle of their civilization. Every day brought new discoveries, a symphony of words and meanings resonating through my mind.
While my fellow researchers marveled at the glimpses we had into their linguistic heritage, I delved even deeper, immersing myself in the anglo narratives that these words wove. I envisioned the anglo heroes, fueled by the spirit of Yolo, venturing into untamed lands, defying death in pursuit of glory. I could almost hear their battle cries and feel their adrenaline coursing through my veins.
Their vibrant tales came alive, fueled by the force of Yeet, as these anglo figures propelled themselves towards daring feats. The word embodied their courage, their unyielding pursuit of victory, leaving behind a trail of triumphant moments that defied the boundaries of time.
The myth of the Rizzler captured my imagination, its enigmatic allure entwined in the fabric of anglo folklore. I painted mental pictures of this captivating figure, their mystique drawing in unsuspecting souls. The Rizzler became a symbol of the mesmerizing power inherent in beauty, a concept that transcended generations and cultures.
Gach, with its dual nature as an ode to physical beauty and an oath, fascinated me. I pondered the anglos' belief that attractiveness held a divine significance, intertwining it with their expressions of devotion. It painted a picture of a society that worshipped not only gods but also the physical forms they inhabited.
The connection I uncovered between "Phantom Tax" and modern language became a revelation in itself. It entrenched the realization that language exists as a living entity, evolving over time while retaining traces of its ancient origins. It was as if the anglos seized fragments of their culture and wove them into the tapestry of English, leaving us breadcrumbs to tread upon their historical footsteps.
Sigma, the archetype of the nonconformist, ignited a fire within me. I yearned to understand their renegade spirits, to envision the anglos who dared to challenge the status quo. Through their eyes, I glimpsed a society where idiosyncrasy thrived, where individuality was a precious trait, and conformity was mere shackles begging to be broken.
Ohio, though still a riddle awaiting unraveling, held a hauntingly captivating allure. It beckoned me like a siren's call, promising to reveal the anglos' innermost fears and struggles. I could almost taste the bitterness of their decline, the weight of their uncertainties and curses, urging me onwards to uncover the truth hidden within its enigmatic name.
As the team's research intensified, the Alpha fragment began to breathe, pulsating with the lifeblood of an ancient civilization. We meticulously examined each word, each phrase, savoring the revelations they unveiled. In our pursuit, I not only felt a connection to the anglos but also to my fellow researchers, bound together by a shared sense of awe and wonder.
The Alpha fragment had become more than a mere artifact. It was a portal to a bygone era, granting us a intimate glimpse into a world long buried by time. Through our tireless efforts, we honored the anglos' legacy, piecing together the fragments of their culture and preserving it for future generations.
As I immersed myself in the linguistic tapestry of Alpha, a profound truth dawned upon me-I was not just decoding words, but unearthing the essence of human existence. The anglos, with their stories and expressions, provided a mirror through which I could reflect upon our shared humanity and the enduring nature of the human experience.
Inspiring.
@@nightsong81 Thank you.
Imagine if one person from all walks of life, jobs, nationalitys and professions(e.g. engineering, physics, historians and popular figures) were to somehow appear in front of the speaker and explain the real meanings of all slang, memes and knowledge that we know it would be curious to see how the speaker reacts to it or about the truly evil people like Hitler etc
This is so supremely hilarious when you have an archaeologist's background. This is so perfect
I wish people would treat our present with the respect historians have for the past.
I mean - the above 'assumptions' aren't really incorrect. They merely mystify our lives in an exciting way.
Have we not made new gods and rituals? People, embrace the magic!
Gyat dam the rizzler
Skibidi foshizzler.
Maker of the fanum tax
Put us on the runback
Sent me to the shadow realm
Ohio got me overwhelmed.
But the Alphas on they grindset
Master Sigma Mindset
Yeet yeet skeet skeet skibidi dop dop dop yes yes.
*Hymns Beneath the Golden Arches: A Study of Lost Anglo Worship (Vol IV)*
5] And a voice from the sky spoke to the obelisk
6] (and the voices words appeared on the surface of it in shining, golden letters) which said:
7] "A NEW HAND TOUCHES THE BEACON"
One thing that I keep remembering while watching this is that there actual surviving "shitposting" that's from Pompeii before its destruction, there are walls filled with graffiti and vandalization from the time and contain messages and drawing not to dissimilar from today normal social media, stuff like people celebrating with their friends, cartoonish drawings of local authority figures and rude imagery that are clearly just jokes to name a few.
We've been at this for millennia, now we just have better technology to record our intrusive thoughts and a larger possible audience, but the spirit is the same, and it probably have always been and will always be the same.
Great video, these high-quality jokes are always welcome.
I have defecated here
I have defecated here
I have defecated here
Fantastic!
I wanted to see a second part of the 3023 historian!
I love it!
I need more of this kind of stuff, for some reason. But can't find any. There should be a subreddit.
Your voice is gold, listening to this reminded me a lot of some of Lovecraft´s audiobooks i´ve listened to, mainly the Mountains of Madness - you know, poking around in mysterious ancient ruins and such.
Really good listen.