3000 years in the future, The History Channel finds your room.

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  • Опубликовано: 13 май 2024
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    This week on Ancient Secret Mysteries: Of The Mysteriously Secret Ancient World, Archeologists from Hubbabard University using a state of the art drone to breach the silence of a long sealed chamber, in the region of what the natives of the 21st century once called "Orlando".
    Music:
    Lord of the Land - Kevin Macleod
    Written and Directed by:
    Frank St. John & Michael Romaniello
    Cinematography by:
    Mitchell Nance
    #wizards #comedy #sketchcomedy
  • ПриколыПриколы

Комментарии • 2,1 тыс.

  • @Wizards_with_Guns
    @Wizards_with_Guns  15 дней назад +3165

    What else will archeologists be SHOCKED to find in your room, 3000 years from now?

    • @DarthChaos77
      @DarthChaos77 15 дней назад

      The piss drawer

    • @rambler8255
      @rambler8255 15 дней назад +133

      A poster of a minecraft tree (Oak Tree)

    • @luckyvolky3041
      @luckyvolky3041 15 дней назад +45

      2 broken digimon x
      1 broken digimon 20th

    • @teachmetohowl
      @teachmetohowl 15 дней назад +101

      My overpriced school textbooks

    • @WAKStudios
      @WAKStudios 15 дней назад +180

      A furby still functioning off of it's original batteries.

  • @captainsprinkles6557
    @captainsprinkles6557 15 дней назад +5185

    I love how they completely understand what a "Busty Anime Mousepad" is but don't know what "legal trouble" when it comes to Saul means.

  • @angst_
    @angst_ 15 дней назад +13471

    This is somehow *less* fictional than some actual history channel shows.

    • @EpicGhostShadow
      @EpicGhostShadow 15 дней назад +79

      Real

    • @hollowman9410
      @hollowman9410 15 дней назад +455

      When I was a child, I was a big fan of history channel and I mostly watched them for their documentaries. I thought that "Ancient Aliens" was a show made purely for entertainment value. I thought to myself "I can understand the appeal of alternate history and pseudoscience, even though it provides basically no real knowledge". It took me a while to understand that it was not made and watched under the pretense of being fictional history.
      It happened around the same time when I realised that the entire network was compromised.

    • @hollowman9410
      @hollowman9410 15 дней назад +187

      I can't believe "finding hitler" was a real show.

    • @DeathnoteBB
      @DeathnoteBB 15 дней назад +182

      @@hollowman9410I miss when the educational channels actually had education. Now it’s all nonsense and reality tv

    • @markstewart4501
      @markstewart4501 15 дней назад +62

      The History channel, what happens when Rupert Murdoch (also owns Fox and Sun News) buys a channel and makes money making a top priority.

  • @MattFacerson
    @MattFacerson 13 дней назад +2998

    👋Hey Professional Archaeologist here, this made everyone on my crew cry tears of laughter. 10000% spot on, keep it up boys!

    • @YEY0806
      @YEY0806 11 дней назад +184

      I bet the "he was probably a king" thing was so relatable

    • @Puppy_Puppington
      @Puppy_Puppington 8 дней назад +26

      Wow. U took anthro and archeology courses? Ur a proooooo

    • @michaelweldon4613
      @michaelweldon4613 5 дней назад +30

      Obviously this is parody, but can you give us examples of things like this? Previously held beliefs in the profession that turned out to be incredibly inaccurate later down the road?

    • @Marryjanesbud
      @Marryjanesbud 4 дня назад

      @@michaelweldon4613 I can’t speak for archeology but there’s A LOT of history in our current history books that is blatantly false. For example, The American Revolution was not a revolution, it was a clandestine operation started by the French Secret Service (The Secret of the King). The French were pulling the strings, the Americans were the puppets. The records of the French Secret Service, while available since 1866, have hardly been used and Britain only opened up its secret archives regarding this war in 2004.
      Hitler was by no means the great dictator most people believed him to be. The complete collection of all laws and decrees (and who decreed them) were only finished in 2023 (started in 1982). The minutes of all meetings Hitler had from 30 January 1933 up to and including 22 April 1945 are in the archives of the US Army (Counterintelligence Corps). Most historians don’t even know they exist. Hitler gave only broad instructions and didn’t follow up on his orders. The driving force behind the Holocaust was Goebbels and Himmler. An awful lot of Hitler’s orders were never carried out.
      The details on how strategic bombardments in World War Two worked were only released in 1969 and as far as I know only a single author made use of them. The bomber-streams were mainly a PR thing and most photographs of such streams are staged.
      The War Diaries of the BEF were also only declassified in 1969. These show the Miracle of Dunkirk is a myth. The British started withdrawing on 15 May 1940 without informing the French and the Belgians. They “didn’t give way to German pressure”, they retreated towards the coast regardless of what the Germans did. The driving force was General Ironside who worked together with Chamberlain (Ironside didn’t trust Churchill). It is not even clear when Churchill was informed. The public statements were all lies, the reports to the French and Belgian High Commands were lies as well, and the maps made public were fakes. Very few authors have made use of these War Diaries and the British government delayed the publication of a book by Admiral Keyes until 1984.
      The idea most people have of the Holocaust is wrong. There were a whopping 45,000 sites all over Europe within the camp, system. As far as I know, only the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum has published works with the latest research.
      The idea people have of Stalin is wrong as well. Stalin’s private archives were only opened up in 2014 and as far as I know only a single book has been written making use of this new material.
      The problem is that it is bloody difficult to change the popular view people have of historical events. The popular view is popular because it makes the general public feel more or less good about themselves (or less bad).
      The Americans don’t want to know they were French puppets. The British don’t want to know they stabbed their Allies in the back. The people in the West don’t want to know Stalin was by no means the ruthless beast he was made out to be, nor do people want to know Hitler wielded relatively little power (the bugger was lazy as hell). People want to see Hitler ands Stalin as villains, reality doesn’t paint that picture. Europeans don’t want to know about 45,000 sites within the camp system as this means they have to admit support for the Holocaust was massive throughout Europe, they want to blame it all on Hitler and the Nazis (which is why the publications come from the US).
      Even if an historian writes a book based on the best available sources, there is absolutely no guarantee he/she will find a publisher. Going against the popular version is usually a financial disaster and publishing companies are not interested in that.
      These are just a couple of examples, plenty more alas.
      And that is the reason you need to read historical books by professionals who did their homework and used mainly primary sources. Not being very popular, such book are often expensive compared to the incorrect popular works. Always look at the sources used before you buy a book.

    • @anubis8586
      @anubis8586 4 дня назад +26

      @@michaelweldon4613I mean this is a parody of the History Channel, not actual archeology & history.

  • @Nedmac
    @Nedmac 12 дней назад +2039

    "The trickster deity, the god of science, demigods even."
    That killed me

    • @RipplyAnemone67
      @RipplyAnemone67 3 дня назад +22

      What will they think of all the other Batman rouges

    • @carlpeterson8279
      @carlpeterson8279 3 дня назад +16

      There were at least three iron men

    • @animarium1249
      @animarium1249 2 дня назад +10

      ​@@RipplyAnemone67Cthonic deities pantheon who punish evil in their hellish realm of stones and darkness. The father, a bat, create his son from a tragedy and giving it a half human form, a robin.
      This robin later ascended and being replaced by a younger deity which embodied Price of Blood and yada yada. I think. Oh, the father married a cat, a shadow, and another demigod from distant land. Also, apparently befriended a Sun God from beyond the Sun. 😂😂😂

    • @RipplyAnemone67
      @RipplyAnemone67 2 дня назад +5

      @@animarium1249I like that idea like all the Batman villains are on one shelf so zsasz is the deity of counting with tally marks, pyg the deity of livestock, calendar man the deity of time, polka dot man the deity of color, penguin the deity of class I guess, riddler the deity of questions, mr freeze the deity of ice, firefly the deity of fire, two face the deity of duality and right and wrong, scarecrow the deity of fear, and kite man the deity of wind.

    • @animarium1249
      @animarium1249 2 дня назад +1

      @@RipplyAnemone67 I think two face is more of whim or cruel fate or impartiality before being corrupted by Chaos they call joker. Oh, ivy for nature freeze for winter.

  • @osiria6322
    @osiria6322 15 дней назад +10546

    "This sock is perfectly fossilized". Could this be the new roman concrete?

    • @Sammy-forgetaboutit-Tony
      @Sammy-forgetaboutit-Tony 15 дней назад +211

      No, that's classic example of a early version of J'ake'Crete...

    • @insanitysymphony9175
      @insanitysymphony9175 15 дней назад +115

      more like spartan concrete if ya know ya know

    • @user-pe4bv7vm2y
      @user-pe4bv7vm2y 13 дней назад +57

      @@insanitysymphony9175 I'm going to yell "THIS IS SPARTA!" next time I'm about to...

    • @xChimkin
      @xChimkin 13 дней назад +8

      lmao

    • @miloelite
      @miloelite 13 дней назад +8

      😂

  • @theartsywhale
    @theartsywhale 15 дней назад +5581

    for anybody reading this 3000 years in the future, have a nice jelque

    • @xkidgey
      @xkidgey 15 дней назад +243

      Goon long and goon hard, people of the future! May Walter and Jesse favor you eternally

    • @windy110
      @windy110 15 дней назад +61

      Thank you fellow jelqler

    • @smithwillnot
      @smithwillnot 15 дней назад +34

      For future generations, regards from Sawcon!

    • @This_is_my_spout
      @This_is_my_spout 15 дней назад +27

      Yeah jelque it up goonies

    • @bobblob23vr2
      @bobblob23vr2 15 дней назад +12

      Jelq

  • @mousermind
    @mousermind 13 дней назад +933

    Three-thousand years from now, we're still pissed about the Library of Alexandria.

    • @lexprontera8325
      @lexprontera8325 10 дней назад +20

      It's pronounced AlexAHHNdria 😄

    • @ELbabotas1
      @ELbabotas1 8 дней назад +14

      @@lexprontera8325 leviosAah

    • @devlinmcguire7543
      @devlinmcguire7543 5 дней назад +42

      Honestly FUCK that random guy who's name has been lost to time. Thousands of years in the future, and we still hate him. ... You know... like... whoever it was, anyway.

    • @alexissey4023
      @alexissey4023 4 дня назад +18

      @@devlinmcguire7543Actuallu that guy burned a temple down, not the library. And Kaz Rowe has a video about how the library didn’t really burn down.

    • @Comuniity_
      @Comuniity_ 2 дня назад +22

      ​@devlinmcguire7543 nothing was actually lost in the burning of the library of Alexanderia, everything in the library either were or had copies, when it actually burnt down it was already mostly out of use and all the most valuable texts had been moved to other libraries and what was in there like I mentioned were either copies or had copies elsewhere. If you wanna get mad about burning libraries then you have European colonizers destroying Aztec and Mayan texts, so much so we know extremely little about cultures that were alive an thriving just a few hundred years ago.

  • @denny4551
    @denny4551 11 дней назад +739

    "They had brilliant techniques of preservation, these people didn't waste a thing" line was underrated. A reference to plastics that went over a lot of people's heads

    • @King-gr3zv
      @King-gr3zv 7 дней назад +45

      Didn’t even realize that 😂 we waste almost religiously

    • @theblackoutexplorer2658
      @theblackoutexplorer2658 5 дней назад

      Plastics? Thought it was talking about the fleshlight thinking it was an actual persevered vag

    • @justinlast2lastharder749
      @justinlast2lastharder749 День назад

      Plastic is a Waste Product from refining petroleum.

    • @Darkest_matter
      @Darkest_matter День назад +2

      ​@@King-gr3zv*athiestically"

  • @ikeaforlife
    @ikeaforlife 15 дней назад +6615

    Can't wait for future civilisations to find the piss drawer

    • @EpicGhostShadow
      @EpicGhostShadow 15 дней назад +253

      That means Mom won't find it, WIN

    • @protalghulnist4126
      @protalghulnist4126 15 дней назад

      Unexpected Jenn melon

    • @Matoro342
      @Matoro342 15 дней назад +154

      What about the poop knife?

    • @FIatts
      @FIatts 15 дней назад +99

      History channel found the piss drawer 😔

    • @nicholas-dv1mg
      @nicholas-dv1mg 15 дней назад +68

      3,000 year old piss crystals

  • @danielcarroll8889
    @danielcarroll8889 15 дней назад +12201

    "That's Dobby from Harry Potter" killed me. Just brilliant

    • @MajinBuuButtercup
      @MajinBuuButtercup 15 дней назад +1274

      I really enjoy the insinuation that Harry Potter is just commonplace in their time.
      I wonder if it's their religion?

    • @BlondeSancho-qb9hz
      @BlondeSancho-qb9hz 15 дней назад +569

      @@MajinBuuButtercup "In the name of the headmaster, the house elf, and the nearly headless ghost."

    • @angolomat882
      @angolomat882 15 дней назад +385

      Nah it's just a surviving story book like the siege of Troy etc. Maybe it's better that way may they think the author is a myth

    • @Dr.Funk8864
      @Dr.Funk8864 15 дней назад +75

      They just know that 3000 years in the future

    • @brugbo613
      @brugbo613 15 дней назад +214

      Fuck, was the Epic of Gilgamesh the Harry Potter of it's time?

  • @asatowolfe
    @asatowolfe 11 дней назад +531

    "A Warrior Culture" with the fursuit literally had me choking from laughing. This whole video was golden.

    • @ChupacabraRex
      @ChupacabraRex 4 дня назад +22

      "Our evidence suggests that they wore this objects into battle. it does not appear they held much significance as armour, but they appear to have fufilled the double ritual purpose of serving to honour their gods, "Robin Hood" by the great Disney Empire, the church of Mouse, and allowing them to differenciate within their ranks. But so much has been swallowed by time."

    • @asatowolfe
      @asatowolfe 4 дня назад +11

      @@ChupacabraRex "Many of these warriors were ranked for their battle prowess with what our sources indicate to be Roman Numerals. Rankings such as 'XD' and the highly coveted 'UWU' being some of the most prevalent.
      They were a proud bunch. When conversing, they would often include their ranking after significant messages to display their position in the hierarchy."

    • @ChupacabraRex
      @ChupacabraRex 4 дня назад +6

      @@asatowolfe "Another thing that has been noticed as being somewhat odd was the amount of heiroglyphic writing in their objects and clothes. Of course, our modern society is fully literary but the idea of a society so anciet being able to read and write seems strange.A propular, prevalent theory is that placing writing on ones clothes or objects signified a higher rank, with those who couldn't placing things such as LOL or LMAO, and "Griddying" as a way to imitate proper writing alongside their many idols of course, and we have been capable of seeing specifc characters repeated over an overagain. Such as "hasbro" and "Macy;s". Scholars think this is likely a magical spell, pehraps the name of some hero or god, which is repeated in order to safegaurd the wearer from harm. Some thought they may signify who made them, but the names don't appear to refer to the human maker, especially ot with how widespread they are. For this reason, the prior theorys this is the major theory and the way of life. Truly Alien.

  • @captainhowdy9297
    @captainhowdy9297 14 дней назад +156

    "this man....was clearly a king."
    *shows an ancient Croc with hella Jibbitz*
    dead

  • @williamshelton4318
    @williamshelton4318 15 дней назад +3923

    “Oh, great Saul, I call upon thee!”
    - me when I goon

    • @trublgrl
      @trublgrl 14 дней назад +107

      You're god damn right.

    • @Amber_Valentine
      @Amber_Valentine 13 дней назад +113

      "Mortals, do thou know thou have rights?"
      -Saul Almighty, Rizz-an Kam 12:9

    • @lukeevans2353
      @lukeevans2353 12 дней назад +1

      @@Amber_Valentine
      Doest thou question my saying? I say unto you, it be insignificant compared to the greatness of my presence. Yea, it be smaller than a grain of sand. I see worlds beyond imagination, yea, that the mind of man comprehendeth not the size, nor the meaning thereof. I descend among you, yet I am above you. I stretch forth my hand, and if I command the thunder and light of the heavens upon them, there it shall be!
      Edit: AI did it better
      And lo, in the midst of their discourse, one didst raise his voice, saying, "Ohhh, do not thou utter 'Oh Jimmy' in such a manner towards me. Dost thou gaze upon me with disdain? Dost thou holdeth pity within thine heart for me? Depart from my presence, for I am not of thy kin."
      Yea, even Howard, thou knowest not the reason why I declined the offer, for it is too insignificant in mine eyes. It holdeth no value, it is but a mere speck in the vast expanse of my aspirations.
      For I doth traverse realms beyond thy comprehension. Thou canst not fathom the extent of my capabilities. I standeth upon heights thou canst not reach, for I am as a deity clothed in mortal form. Behold, from my very fingertips doth spring forth lightning, a testament to the power that doth reside within me!

    • @YourLocalPlushAddict
      @YourLocalPlushAddict 11 дней назад +26

      Thy shall Aquire substance and partake in cooking with me jesilus sulius
      -Walus Walter whitey

    • @rorychivers8769
      @rorychivers8769 11 дней назад +6

      I'm sorry, what does the word "goon" mean in this context, I find it hard to keep up sometimes

  • @jacob_be_ez2374
    @jacob_be_ez2374 15 дней назад +2669

    The fur suit being described as an example of “Warrior Culture” got me good😂 This is easily my favorite video on the internet

    • @eduardostapenko6808
      @eduardostapenko6808 15 дней назад +35

      same.
      and "fursuit" is one word.

    • @AmunDeus
      @AmunDeus 14 дней назад +96

      I will never be able to look at Aztec eagle and jaguar warriors the same way again 🙃

    • @eduardostapenko6808
      @eduardostapenko6808 14 дней назад +36

      @@AmunDeus well, that were allways their warrior fursuits. but tech was no so developed as now, so it was not a fullsuit.

    • @ThePimpinator
      @ThePimpinator 7 дней назад

      🤓 ​@@eduardostapenko6808

    • @YourFBIagent118
      @YourFBIagent118 День назад

      @@AmunDeus😂😂 omg it all makes sense now.

  • @oskara1991
    @oskara1991 11 дней назад +246

    “This man was…clearly a king” that one took me out 😂

  • @asterglaceon
    @asterglaceon 11 дней назад +91

    I love the insinuation that they know exactly what anime, mousepads, and Baja blasts are

  • @disappointedfather5114
    @disappointedfather5114 15 дней назад +3229

    I like how everything is taken way out of proportion and the mundane is given theological weight, until "That's Dobby. From Harry Potter." No misunderstanding here. Because of course the one thing that would endure the test of time is freakin Harry Potter.

    • @williamshelton4318
      @williamshelton4318 15 дней назад +134

      Also the fashion sense of former Indian Prime Minister Jawaharlal Nehru.

    • @GiveMeMyLunchMoney
      @GiveMeMyLunchMoney 15 дней назад +25

      Well duh, after the election of the immortal God emperor, Magius, it is mandatory to read it in your wizard literature class.

    • @sunbirth4795
      @sunbirth4795 15 дней назад +24

      It would figure, unfortunately

    • @SeanWinters
      @SeanWinters 15 дней назад +81

      This sounds like an affirmation of the scriptural significance of harry Potter
      "Of course, beyond all things, the holy text of the chamber of secrets remains!"

    • @miloelite
      @miloelite 13 дней назад +1

      😂

  • @kojikarasake6969
    @kojikarasake6969 15 дней назад +1268

    "They would invoke him or call upon Saul's name in dire need" I'm dying 💀💀

  • @lancemedley7740
    @lancemedley7740 14 дней назад +275

    They just ignore the dead guy at 0:56 lol 😂

    • @thetman0068
      @thetman0068 3 дня назад +27

      Gooned too hard. RIP 🪦

    • @uuytk
      @uuytk 3 дня назад +9

      Half life 2 Fast Zombie corpse jumpscare

    • @VictorJoseph-lu2rs
      @VictorJoseph-lu2rs 21 час назад

      ​@@thetman0068Stayed hard for daddy Tate

  • @prmoseley
    @prmoseley 13 дней назад +54

    "That's Dobby from Harry Potter." That line killed me

  • @LittleNGaming
    @LittleNGaming 15 дней назад +2561

    Omg, I graduated from Hubbubard Uni! Really great to see my school get representation on the news. GO BLEAGLES!

    • @Idkpleasejustletmechangeit
      @Idkpleasejustletmechangeit 15 дней назад +67

      I hate Hubbubard Uni. I went to Hurdurburgur.

    • @LittleNGaming
      @LittleNGaming 15 дней назад +161

      @@Idkpleasejustletmechangeit just mad your giddleball team lost EVERY game against ours.

    • @Idkpleasejustletmechangeit
      @Idkpleasejustletmechangeit 15 дней назад +35

      @@LittleNGaming you're just saying that because your founder killed Grargl the school florl!

    • @yourguykhonshu3972
      @yourguykhonshu3972 15 дней назад

      Your university isn't even that prestigious. Tired of you hedera helix league kids thinking you're all that just because your parents paid enough cyber credits to get you in.

    • @microwave221
      @microwave221 15 дней назад +56

      My ex used to go to Hurdurburgur, did they still have the spaghetti gardens when you were there, or was that after the Fountain Day?

  • @azathoththe3rd
    @azathoththe3rd 15 дней назад +643

    I love the fact that not everything is completely lost the time. They still know what Harry Potter and anime mouse pads are

    • @hafirenggayuda
      @hafirenggayuda 11 дней назад +41

      Harry Potter and Anime mouse pads are eternal!

    • @quadratic7578
      @quadratic7578 10 дней назад +51

      Im surprised they didn't call it fertility goddess

    • @itwillbe-itwillnotbe-itis
      @itwillbe-itwillnotbe-itis 10 дней назад +14

      They don't understand the house they entered but they remember dobby

  • @Hunter-im3tg
    @Hunter-im3tg 10 дней назад +41

    I love that even after 3000 years from now the library of Alexandria was not forgotten

  • @brightlight3520
    @brightlight3520 11 дней назад +130

    "Their entire class system was centered around the hording of symbolic totems or trinkets"
    He's not wrong!

  • @resmues
    @resmues 15 дней назад +2122

    "AI prompt artist's rendering" LOL absolute legends, you never miss!

    • @heathbrideau6640
      @heathbrideau6640 15 дней назад +67

      I can't tell if this is a man carrying thing reference or not

    • @LunarOverdrive
      @LunarOverdrive 15 дней назад +67

      @@heathbrideau6640 He never references, the absolute man.

    • @heathbrideau6640
      @heathbrideau6640 15 дней назад +32

      @@LunarOverdrive They never gun, the absolute wizards!

    • @ryanmccampbell7
      @ryanmccampbell7 15 дней назад +16

      The funny thing is I'm 90% certain several of the other shots were also AI generated

    • @Chicky_Lumps
      @Chicky_Lumps 15 дней назад +29

      ​@@ryanmccampbell7 More like 100% certain, but in a weird way this is one of the few cases where it fits the surrounding stupidity.

  • @straight-up479
    @straight-up479 15 дней назад +999

    This makes me think about how if archaeologists could figure out the types of chemicals we all keep under our sink without knowing what their purpose was, they’d think we were making bombs

    • @mitochondria6247
      @mitochondria6247 14 дней назад +108

      Saying 'they'd think' implies they're wrong

    • @TheRealRusDaddy
      @TheRealRusDaddy 13 дней назад +34

      Thing is you gotta figure out which chemicals you need when you want to make one

    • @dustinbrueggemann1875
      @dustinbrueggemann1875 11 дней назад +50

      @@TheRealRusDaddy The trick to mixing cleaning chemicals is to be yourself and have fun with it

    • @serteshsardrakal2272
      @serteshsardrakal2272 9 дней назад +20

      "A society that casually committed warcrimes on itself!"- history channel 3k years in the future

    • @lityerambidextrous3668
      @lityerambidextrous3668 8 дней назад +1

      You’re not?

  • @johng92
    @johng92 13 дней назад +33

    Name: Maurine Biologist
    Occupation: Children’s Author
    That bit sealed the deal for me.

  • @CannedNoodles
    @CannedNoodles 11 дней назад +28

    The fact that the baja blast cup and busty mousepad are casually mentioned implies they are nothing out-of-the-ordinary in the future

  • @abbycross90210
    @abbycross90210 15 дней назад +1078

    This 100% reminded me of one of my favorite books from ages ago (1979). It's called "Motel of the Mysteries" by David Macaulay. It's not a novel or anything, just a big, hilarious book with drawn pictures about 2000 years in the future when archaeologists find an old, shitty buried motel. There's a picture of a skeleton on his motel bed, who was obviously watching TV when he died. But the archaeologists surmise it's a sacred burial chamber, the TV was an altar, etc. The pictures of the guys in the bathroom killed me. One of them dons the toilet seat around his neck, convinced it was part of an ancient burial rite. Too funny. Loved it.

    • @applesyrupgaming
      @applesyrupgaming 14 дней назад +21

      i remember that book

    • @MissionSilo
      @MissionSilo 13 дней назад +2

      Hilarious

    • @erindizmo
      @erindizmo 12 дней назад +10

      I absolutely love that book! I bought another copy a couple years back. Don't regret it at all.

    • @bernardocoto8519
      @bernardocoto8519 11 дней назад +49

      When archaelogists find something they are clueless about they just label it "ritual artifact with posible religious meaning".

    • @shan4680
      @shan4680 11 дней назад +1

      I was thinking of just that when watching this!

  • @elecmagpulse7385
    @elecmagpulse7385 15 дней назад +487

    2:45 It’s theorized that these battle suits were reserved for only those of great wealth.

    • @eduardostapenko6808
      @eduardostapenko6808 15 дней назад +36

      100%

    • @pixel7071
      @pixel7071 12 дней назад +69

      as a poor furry I can confirm, only those of highest riches could afford such battle outfits

    • @Wilson_Does_Stuff
      @Wilson_Does_Stuff 10 дней назад +23

      However, these battle suits had also come at an additional cost, as the wearer would typically begin to loose their mind, or so we are beginning to believe , due to the fact that people of these battle suits would often times loose connection with friends and relatives, most commonly observed within father figures. We speculate that this could be a result of mental insanity, but we can only speculate for now.
      We also believe that a cause for the insanity could be due to that the wearer’s brains might become of how these suits very closely resembled animals, but again, this is purely speculation.

    • @eduardostapenko6808
      @eduardostapenko6808 10 дней назад +11

      @@Wilson_Does_Stuff sounds wery accurate... did you tried it on, or something?!

    • @Wilson_Does_Stuff
      @Wilson_Does_Stuff 9 дней назад +4

      @@eduardostapenko6808 no

  • @SpencyRockMC
    @SpencyRockMC 14 дней назад +116

    I wrote a script for a college course a few months ago with an almost identical premise because I was specifically inspired by your tone. Imagine my surprise when I found this on my recommended today.
    “Archeologists 3000 years in the future explore ruins in Florida, mistaking modern phenomena as culture and religion” perfectly summarizes both scripts, so it’s cool to see the different directions we took. Incredible work as per usual!

    • @hiepdoshin7846
      @hiepdoshin7846 6 дней назад +3

      What was the direction you took?

    • @SpencyRockMC
      @SpencyRockMC 8 часов назад

      @@hiepdoshin7846 This was the prompt I submitted to my professor:
      "Archeologists thousands of years into the future are digging through the ruins of the once great civilization known as Boca Raton, where they find the written question “Why did the chicken cross the road?” Believing it to be some kind of prophecy, they take their discoveries to the masses, where the question is tested by scientists and discussed by philosophers. When they discover the answer is “to get to the other side”, a portal to another dimension opens up near the planet, and a futuristic race of chicken people emerge to wipe out this civilization for knowing too much, just as they did to the last one."
      A lot of the comedic heightening relied on referencing the evolution of modern trends. There was even one thing that just stayed the same and everyone knew about still, like their Dobby situation. I had the main premise rely on making an unfunny joke funny through an absurd level of importance, but their main premise relied on the documentary aspect of their skit.

  • @swahilimaster
    @swahilimaster 11 дней назад +11

    "These people didn't waste a thing" absolutely killed me.

  • @K4g4m1
    @K4g4m1 15 дней назад +764

    The spoof is so good it feels like watching the real thing.

    • @samwilson6316
      @samwilson6316 15 дней назад +24

      Fr what if our ancestors were able to take a glimpse into what our perspective was about them, they'd have a laugh too 😂

    • @femmesammy8768
      @femmesammy8768 14 дней назад +5

      Fr tho this was like equally interesting as it was funny

    • @CONGTHEGUERILLA
      @CONGTHEGUERILLA 10 дней назад +2

      Ik it’s so goon!!!

  • @gorenbk
    @gorenbk 15 дней назад +881

    they just seem like they arent that more advanced than us but like to look down on us lol

    • @AnomieDomine
      @AnomieDomine 15 дней назад +30

      I'm proud of you. Good job

    • @pizza-pi
      @pizza-pi 14 дней назад +15

      @@AnomieDomine do you think they'll ever unlock the hidden mystery

    • @dogfight2018
      @dogfight2018 14 дней назад +48

      The same could possibly be argued for how we look at different peoples of history, honestly.

    • @tuttosalve8352
      @tuttosalve8352 14 дней назад +63

      That’s 100% what’s going on, we do that now! Ancient people weren’t very dissimilar they just did things differently. Oh what because everything in our world has right angles and is made of plastic we’re ‘advanced’?

    • @gorenbk
      @gorenbk 14 дней назад

      @@tuttosalve8352 honestly idk much history except recent history (19th-20th century), idk much about that

  • @Dr.Quarex
    @Dr.Quarex 8 дней назад +17

    "This man was clearly a king" is what truly landed the killing blow and I am now dead, thank you

  • @kmanthecoolest9304
    @kmanthecoolest9304 8 дней назад +15

    2:58 "Theres Dobby, From Harry Potter" This kills me 😂

  • @echodff
    @echodff 15 дней назад +269

    This bit could go on for 100 episodes and still not get old

    • @ho0t0w1
      @ho0t0w1 13 дней назад +3

      @WizardsWithGuns I *_TRIPLE_* DOG DARE YAAAA!!!

    • @crunchyapples596
      @crunchyapples596 11 дней назад

      It's amazing how they can do that.

  • @pureradiants888
    @pureradiants888 15 дней назад +426

    God I love this. The “canned meat” fleshlight got me

    • @stephhhie17
      @stephhhie17 14 дней назад +2

      What is the flower?

    • @GeeDoggy123
      @GeeDoggy123 14 дней назад +5

      Im also here to inquire about the rose.

    • @SaltyMaud
      @SaltyMaud 14 дней назад +19

      @@stephhhie17 Suction vibe for women.

    • @stephhhie17
      @stephhhie17 14 дней назад +6

      @@SaltyMaud Thank you, although that raises the question, what was it doing in this room if it is for women?

    • @user-df2fl1pj6q
      @user-df2fl1pj6q 14 дней назад +8

      So, vaginas don't exist in the future? But the editors blurred it because we in this reality obviously know what it is, but if this is from their perspective, why would they blur it if they thought it was meat? Maybe they knew idk

  • @Aaron-fh6hd
    @Aaron-fh6hd 13 дней назад +12

    The delivery of "Perhaps... Greater than the library of Alexandria." Is incredibly spor on.

  • @tomallan477
    @tomallan477 13 дней назад +9

    I like the idea that the characters of the joker, rick Sanchez, and iron man have all been lost to time, but the history channel still exists.

  • @smilemore7431
    @smilemore7431 15 дней назад +239

    When they described the “idols of faith” I was fully expecting some horrible anime figurines in jars.
    “We assumed the glass casing around the idols was to protect them, but recent discoveries of fluid inside the glass suggests this was a ritual, a sacrifice of some kind to these beings. Truly a fascinating culture.”

    • @capperbuns
      @capperbuns 8 дней назад

      "we believe it to be a fertility ritual, by offering liquids to the idol they were able to get higher odds of reproduction"

    • @ChupacabraRex
      @ChupacabraRex 4 дня назад +9

      Nah, they'll come across a video of a barbecue and think "This appears to have been a sacrifice to "Uncle Sam", a mythical patron dieity of folk hero of the precosuour state in th great missisipian river."

    • @bearturtle6058
      @bearturtle6058 2 дня назад +1

      Would be funny if they were Elden Ring figurines, and the Malenia figure has sticky fluids on it.

  • @handbanana4899
    @handbanana4899 15 дней назад +326

    Based on how the History Channel's Vikings ended up, I 100% expect the History Channel to end up filming 5 people screwing in my room and claiming it to be a historically accurate reenactment of a typical lazy Tuesday afternoon for me.

    • @zacharyphilbeck8650
      @zacharyphilbeck8650 8 дней назад +1

      Viking’s kind of sucked. First two seasons were really good but it was clear there was heavy political bias

    • @handbanana4899
      @handbanana4899 8 дней назад +6

      @@zacharyphilbeck8650 Man I can't even coherently remember what happened after the first two seasons. It all just kind of devolves into a montage of treachery, symbolism and hallucinations.

    • @user-kj1ko7ub5g
      @user-kj1ko7ub5g 3 дня назад

      if they did this in my room they would find the bones and the video would be unsuitable for youtube

  • @Dominion69420
    @Dominion69420 13 дней назад +14

    Fun fact: theres a massive chiseled monolith filled with 2012-2014 memes buried somewhere in the deserts of the western US for future civilizations to find

    • @Derpmandang10
      @Derpmandang10 4 дня назад

      4chan managed to finally get someone to pour something that would cause it to be damaged so no go.

    • @Thedarkbunnyrabbit
      @Thedarkbunnyrabbit День назад +1

      @@Derpmandang10 This is extremely unlikely. Even if they successfully found it, they could not have poured enough to actually destroy it. It was debunked.

  • @lord_scrubington
    @lord_scrubington 12 дней назад +8

    3000 years into the future, and video transmission from their rover is still 720p

  • @carchub
    @carchub 15 дней назад +424

    “Have a nice Jelq”
    Thanks brother I will now

  • @duaamuaa
    @duaamuaa 15 дней назад +383

    The cinematography in this is insane omg

  • @tinyengineshed34
    @tinyengineshed34 8 дней назад +5

    2:46 honestly that warrior fursuit thing looks cool as fuck

  • @Coloradorivr
    @Coloradorivr 10 дней назад +10

    I like how there is implications that somehow, Harry Potter still remains prominent in the human zeitgeist 3k years into the future.

    • @stewagner
      @stewagner День назад +1

      I'd guess it is more seen like the Illiad by homer or some other piece of ancient literature. If any book is preserved this long it is HP, it has millions of copies sold

  • @ryanconner2600
    @ryanconner2600 15 дней назад +411

    The ancient texts often spoke of the forbidden love that Larry and Pickle Rick shared. So glad to see them immortalized.

    • @doughboywhine
      @doughboywhine 15 дней назад +8

      I need a poster of that asap

    • @millenniumhandandshrimp2610
      @millenniumhandandshrimp2610 15 дней назад

      It is said that Pickle Rick was once a mortal man, but that he transformed himself in order to escape a harrowing ritual called "therapy".
      We know scant little about this "therapy", only that it is written that many a man would rather cast himself off a bridge than undergo it.

  • @chuckwagon3718
    @chuckwagon3718 15 дней назад +323

    "Maurine Biologist: Children's teacher" really got me

  • @Earth_To_Humanity
    @Earth_To_Humanity 3 дня назад +2

    0:54 "The researchers have uncovered a scroll, what may be a diploma of high academic acheivment" I DIED LOL 😂🤣

  • @StoopidMonkey0
    @StoopidMonkey0 10 дней назад +10

    Dude the final scene at 3:50 with Walter and the vape got me. That's my exact vape.

    • @knexfan100
      @knexfan100 2 дня назад

      The GeekVape Ageis.... solid mod, insane that a Chinese company is practically carrying the quality box mods industry after the FDA's corruption put quality american mod companies out of business.
      Autism aside: What's your setup if you don't mind me asking?

  • @highmike8379
    @highmike8379 15 дней назад +227

    the modern world doesn't deserve this channel.

  • @aecynthetic
    @aecynthetic 5 дней назад +4

    This is both hilarious while also instilling in me the dread of dying not to see how the future actually ends up

  • @Nen_niN
    @Nen_niN 11 часов назад +1

    "Göl'bunki Tumbo" being considered aptly named is also hilarious. Every thing here is just golden

  • @hyenapaine
    @hyenapaine 15 дней назад +74

    "This sock is perfectly fossilized" LOL

  • @hoeton3
    @hoeton3 15 дней назад +418

    Good thing they didn't find his search history 💀

    • @Tiberium10332
      @Tiberium10332 15 дней назад +25

      I was afraid they would use black light and still find evidence.

    • @ch-53esuperstallion76
      @ch-53esuperstallion76 13 дней назад +3

      @@Tiberium10332oh please no

    • @amadeosendiulo2137
      @amadeosendiulo2137 8 дней назад

      They'd just be like: they offered their semen to a fertility goddess.

    • @who-ny5oe
      @who-ny5oe 4 дня назад

      Porn?

  • @rulthlessrudy
    @rulthlessrudy 4 дня назад +2

    Glad the knowledge of Dobby, Harry Potter, Busty Anime Mousepads, and Baja Blast will stay timeless

  • @notaulgoodman9732
    @notaulgoodman9732 13 дней назад +5

    This unironically reminded me so much of the history documentaries I watched as a kid. Immediately reminded of the smell I imagined the mummies and chambers to be.

  • @persici2725
    @persici2725 15 дней назад +169

    Göl'Bunki Tumbo sounds like "Göbekli tepe" recited from distant memory while drunk

    • @millenniumhandandshrimp2610
      @millenniumhandandshrimp2610 15 дней назад +7

      Inspiring profile picture.

    • @user-df2fl1pj6q
      @user-df2fl1pj6q 14 дней назад +2

      Ahh, nice history channel reference, I thought it sounded ancient aliens like

    • @exosproudmamabear558
      @exosproudmamabear558 13 дней назад +3

      Except Göbekli tepe is in Turkey and turkey is not an island. Well oceans may sink but I refuse to believe a goober from Turkey having enough money to buy all of those merches and do not have any tea or Turkish coffee packs lying around somewhere.

    • @berwynsigns4115
      @berwynsigns4115 9 дней назад +1

      ​@@exosproudmamabear558ok but if it was a distant memory recited while drunk u might not remember that

    • @exosproudmamabear558
      @exosproudmamabear558 9 дней назад +1

      @@berwynsigns4115 I mean yeah I was talking about this place being in Göbekli tepe instead of the person who named this being shitfaced drunk so you are right.

  • @earthfireinfinity
    @earthfireinfinity 15 дней назад +80

    3:00 i like how this implies that of all things, harry potter is still the same after 3000 years

    • @EricT01
      @EricT01 9 дней назад +12

      I mean we know about the Odyssey and Epic of Gilgamesh to this day.

    • @sasstsuma1467
      @sasstsuma1467 8 дней назад

      Maybe it'll be our civilization's Iliad

    • @bait5257
      @bait5257 7 дней назад

      ​@@EricT01f

  • @FindTheFun
    @FindTheFun 11 дней назад +6

    The ADHD overkill of .5 second video clips and computer noises in the intro was depressingly accurate.

  • @TheCol111
    @TheCol111 10 дней назад +3

    First 30 seconds, already feeling myself sink into my chair and my mind go blank, getting prepared to consume bad documentary slop, you've done a good job recreating the history channel feel.

  • @juk9131
    @juk9131 15 дней назад +157

    I love the fact that they still know about Harry potter

    • @exosproudmamabear558
      @exosproudmamabear558 13 дней назад +11

      They probably found the full book because it is so wide spread. The anime part was most interesting since anime is a digital form and they lost almost every digital form so where did they learn it was anime?

    • @hafirenggayuda
      @hafirenggayuda 11 дней назад +5

      I think the anime culture survive in the far future, but they probably greatly misinterpreted it

    • @user-xx7kl7sr6i
      @user-xx7kl7sr6i 9 дней назад

      ​@@exosproudmamabear558
      Surviving merch
      There's unironical weebs out there with Doomsday bunkers and instead of classic literature they just have manga and anime and videogames lol.

  • @jacebagley3025
    @jacebagley3025 15 дней назад +290

    gooning is SO 2023, everyone i know is busy munting. I do it every weekend

    • @Wizards_with_Guns
      @Wizards_with_Guns  15 дней назад +118

      it’s the new meta

    • @FriedNoodlee
      @FriedNoodlee 15 дней назад +37

      mods plz nerf munting, totally ruins the community goon sesh

    • @GiveMeMyLunchMoney
      @GiveMeMyLunchMoney 15 дней назад +5

      Nu-uh! Getting red is what's totally trundular right now!

    • @doughboywhine
      @doughboywhine 15 дней назад +13

      munting is out already. If you were trendy you would be tlichling instead

    • @Dark_Peace
      @Dark_Peace 15 дней назад +11

      Noooo I'm in my early twenties and I don't understand new young people's lingo
      I don't want to be old !

  • @user-yc9cs3bc3i
    @user-yc9cs3bc3i 9 дней назад +2

    I came in here expecting for an actual history channel look on how people 3000 years from now would view my room, I am pleasantly surprised and not disappointed in the slightest.

  • @MrMaddfish
    @MrMaddfish 5 дней назад +2

    This videos absolutely deserves a fucken award for being a work of art
    There language was so complex
    "Goon session in progress"
    😂

  • @alexgrey7972
    @alexgrey7972 15 дней назад +62

    Dobbi is timeless

  • @blakewhite3131
    @blakewhite3131 15 дней назад +86

    Ive never seen a minion in a maga hat and that visual brought me to tears thats fucking terrible i love it

    • @blakewhite3131
      @blakewhite3131 15 дней назад

      NOT THE FLESHLIGHT F U C K

    • @CatSurfer
      @CatSurfer 15 дней назад +6

      ​@@blakewhite3131It's just canned meat

    • @blakewhite3131
      @blakewhite3131 15 дней назад +2

      @@CatSurfer you're right, I know nothing of these ancient peoples

  • @fahmiismail4939
    @fahmiismail4939 10 дней назад +3

    I love how of all the artifacts, Dobby from Harry Potter was still recognizable.

  • @TheDennys21
    @TheDennys21 9 дней назад +2

    "These people didn't waste a thing."
    Haha that couldn't be further from the truth.

  • @teachmetohowl
    @teachmetohowl 15 дней назад +173

    The possibility that people may actually evaluate our era like this one day just puts this video on another level

    • @queball685
      @queball685 15 дней назад +28

      I do wonder how the advent of the internet will change historical research thousands of years from now. Every aspect of humanity is now recorded in an insane amount of detail, but at the same time, to trawl through and make sense of all that information would just be overwhelming.

    • @buffobison3099
      @buffobison3099 15 дней назад

      @@queball685a lot of the internet is already deteriorating over time (especially with links), like most of history the loss of the majority of human information is unavoidable. Honestly probably for the best

    • @fivebrosstopmos
      @fivebrosstopmos 15 дней назад +30

      ​@@queball685Really I think our digital media is too fragile to last.

    • @MilkLavenderTea-fn8jw
      @MilkLavenderTea-fn8jw 15 дней назад +10

      ​@@queball685digital stuff doesnt live well and people historically take little to no care of physical ones with little expection(and those go through dozens of edits)

    • @basileusbasil4041
      @basileusbasil4041 15 дней назад +6

      @@queball685 the entire internet needs to be meticulously maintained.

  • @user-sl1wt1dv4y
    @user-sl1wt1dv4y 15 дней назад +48

    The "Li-Saul al Gaib" is too humble

  • @mcsone_
    @mcsone_ 9 дней назад +9

    0:17 bruh the dot is pointing at exactly where i live nah wtf 😭😭😭

  • @pajamapantsjack5874
    @pajamapantsjack5874 13 дней назад +5

    “Have a nice jelk” is something I say to my buds everyday, they got that on point in the future

  • @ShiddySushi
    @ShiddySushi 15 дней назад +74

    It took me too long to realize this wasn't the actual History Channel. It was the actual video evidence that proved it to me.

  • @nomoretwitterhandles
    @nomoretwitterhandles 15 дней назад +40

    "Rinona Wider" showing up as a name on screen absolutely killed me. Great video!

    • @tmage23
      @tmage23 15 дней назад

      Possibly influenced by the Spiffing Brit's "Reanu Keeves"

    • @nomoretwitterhandles
      @nomoretwitterhandles 14 дней назад

      @@tmage23 Perhaps! Though that's not something I've heard of beforehand, and I sometimes switch the first letters of people's names myself lol. Regardless of whether or not it was inspired, it was still pretty hilarious to me!

    • @ash_11117
      @ash_11117 11 дней назад

      @@nomoretwitterhandlesyes, it’s called a spoonerism

  • @Postal268
    @Postal268 13 дней назад +4

    This RUclips channel is an ancient treasure that must be preserved for 3000 years

  • @CreativeCultureOfficial
    @CreativeCultureOfficial 11 дней назад +3

    I’m so high I thought this was a real episode

  • @joffles6516
    @joffles6516 15 дней назад +48

    2:53 the fact that I have that exact poster hung up right next to me rn made me die laughing

    • @deep_bob-wk6nh
      @deep_bob-wk6nh 15 дней назад +15

      Soo you too pray to the Great Saul in your times of need?

    • @amadeosendiulo2137
      @amadeosendiulo2137 8 дней назад +2

      Better call Saul 🛐

    • @isaiah3491
      @isaiah3491 6 дней назад

      @@deep_bob-wk6nhthis is a common misconception he’s actually just a prophet.

    • @ChuiPasVraimentMoi
      @ChuiPasVraimentMoi 8 часов назад

      ​@@amadeosendiulo2137the esperanto guy right?

  • @gameguild2396
    @gameguild2396 15 дней назад +31

    They're gonna open pandora's box if my room was perfectly sealed for 3000 years. The stuff that's already growing in it does not need that kind of preservation.

    • @thesalvager3020
      @thesalvager3020 15 дней назад

      Ancient fungi and bacteria long since thought extinct that the immune system of the 31st century is not able to fight off.

  • @dabeastfromdaweast9788
    @dabeastfromdaweast9788 14 дней назад +3

    This channel is so criminally underrated

  • @guilhermecunha2969
    @guilhermecunha2969 13 дней назад +3

    3000 yrs in the future and Dobby still recognizable

  • @Ajee02
    @Ajee02 15 дней назад +54

    NAAAAAH THAT "BATTLE SUIT" DAWGGG 💀💀💀💀💀

  • @EpicGhostShadow
    @EpicGhostShadow 15 дней назад +22

    I need this as a series

    • @lunabourke3923
      @lunabourke3923 15 дней назад +1

      The series Time Trumpet is something you might enjoy then, it was made around 2007, and is set about thirty years later and looks back at the immediete future of the time it was made. You can find it on RUclips.

    • @EpicGhostShadow
      @EpicGhostShadow 15 дней назад +1

      @@lunabourke3923 bet, thank you!

    • @EpicGhostShadow
      @EpicGhostShadow 18 часов назад +1

      @@lunabourke3923 I watched the first two episodes and that shit made me giggle, couldn't get super into it but I wanted to thank you for the suggestion!!

  • @diabolusabinfernum3461
    @diabolusabinfernum3461 8 дней назад +1

    This is makes me wanna leave cryptic messages and stuff in my room and imagine how future historians would interpret meanings where there are none.

  • @trash-heap3989
    @trash-heap3989 9 дней назад +1

    This was such a brilliant sketch! A great disection of our current time into a comedic archeological documentary.
    Funny work, I loved the "ruins", and other prop work, and the statue of Heisenberg in a hazard suit holding a bong was a great end.

  • @daleksec01
    @daleksec01 15 дней назад +26

    “Have a nice Jelk” is something I’m going to try to say once a day now.

  • @sammykat2hb
    @sammykat2hb 15 дней назад +12

    There are SO many easter eggs in this. The map at the beginning showing the Googisney Wastes and Amazulu Desert did me in

  • @closeben
    @closeben 12 дней назад +2

    the production quality of this video is top-tier. you guys are absolute wizards.

  • @tylerdouglass7270
    @tylerdouglass7270 13 дней назад +3

    RUclips recommendations did a solid job for once showing me this gem.

  • @-desertpackrat
    @-desertpackrat 15 дней назад +17

    I think about this every time people find a random ancient item and make theories about it.

  • @curllum
    @curllum 15 дней назад +19

    “They seem to have… lubricated their socks in order to perhaps keep their feet clean or smooth as they traversed this rough landscape. It seems time, however, has stiffened this one”

  • @christopher2684
    @christopher2684 10 дней назад +2

    I suspect this is wildly more accurate than we imagine.

  • @conninator2000
    @conninator2000 9 дней назад +2

    "As ancient asteonaut theorists contend, this room was most likely made with the help of.... aliens..."

  • @ethsalart6466
    @ethsalart6466 15 дней назад +15

    WAIT THIS NEEDS A PART TWO THIS IS SO FUNNY

    • @eduardostapenko6808
      @eduardostapenko6808 15 дней назад +2

      indeed.
      i'm especially interested in those battlesuits.

  • @imanflexington1677
    @imanflexington1677 15 дней назад +24

    "This sock is perfectly fossilized"

  • @Dmanthepowerful
    @Dmanthepowerful 4 дня назад +1

    Love this video. The only thing it’s missing is enough advertisements and recaps to make it a 40 minute episode

  • @lukyansilver2771
    @lukyansilver2771 13 дней назад +3

    please make this a series this is a work of genius