What I Learned From Approaching 10,000 Women
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- Опубликовано: 3 июн 2021
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Pickup is a bizarre hobby but I have learned some interesting lessons. Хобби
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To your point about being comfortable getting rejected, it is like Bruce Lee said, "You must learn the art of dying."
I am 27 male, 198cm tall, atlhletic figure, doing triathlon, top 10% earner, masters from very good European university. I have always been physically attractive for women but despite all that managed to get only mediocre results (mainly being approached by women in a club without doing any work myself). I am introvert with quite intense approach anxiety thus I never approached a women. But I realized that the top girls will never approach me and I need to take action otherwise I will never be satisfied with my dating life. Started to practice cold approach this week and I must admit its so difficult. For now I just managed to approach women asking for directions and also approached some girls asking where I can find a good restaurant. My next baby step is to start showing intent during the cold approach and I find it extremely intimidating. I find your content very helpful and it gives me lot of power to continue my journey. thanks a lot and top notch work man! Greetings from Slovakia!
I like the asking for directions as an opener that may lead to a longer conversation with a girl.
Sometimes it may be better to meet women away from home than closer to home. Some women may respond better if they are helping somebody compared to meeting a guy that is from the same area just looking to meet
I think you are on the right path based on what you posted. You just need to have have a little more luck.
Your comment just debunked a lot of the bs the red pill gurus say
"It's just being good looking and chasing the bag"
Although I agree with the "women don't care about a man's struggles, the hang out in the finish line and Pick Up the winner"
No matter how much value do you have
If You don't create the opportunities to them to see that value, they won't see it
Other thing i Strongly recommend you it's in YOUR CASE, BELIEVE that looks matter a ton
Because if you're a Chad you can brainwash yourself believing that that's the only thing that women want that'll make easier approaching and easier to convey your personality when you're in set
Nazdar Matej, je to celkom funny akurat som sa "stazoval" ze na SK nie su muzi ktori taketo nieco skusaju a maju na to gule....a zrazu narazim na tvoj komentar. Odklial si?
Maybe get coaching.
Life is too short to be scared to approach. I was very shy like you but when I relaxed myself and said time is running i have to enjoy life I started approaching and getting results while having fun with it.
2 most popular quotes from girls I’ve heard
1. It was nice meeting you
2. I have to go find my friends
I feel it, change your mindset to - INJECT OR EJECT💯
High risk high reward! 😈🙌
Lmao
How did “I have a boyfriend” not make this list? Lol
“I need to go to the bathroom”
Getaway from me creep
I’m 43 and one thing I’ll say is that I massively over valued sex, and picking up when I was much younger. I should have spent far more time finding good quality friends, partying less and meeting excellent quality feminine and homely girls (there are a lot). Also, I genuinely think I should have been visiting sex workers in my 20s for several reasons, confidence, take the mystique out of women, understand the nature of reciprocity and make myself try less hard. I’m extremely confident and capable now, but wasted all my best years chasing terrible party girls who were reckless and nasty. Men need to start putting their needs first more, else they’ll end up picking up terrible girls…
You just hit your impotent age.
Me too
Homely? You meant comely, right?
Great comment, I fully agree.
I'm nitpicking, but homely doesn't mean what you think it means.
Epiphanies:
1. Even if you are just starting to approach, you will still get enough girls to make something out of, as long as you are not creepy or awkward.
2. It is ok to make your intentions clear, and that is usually the best way to go about it.
Part 2 coming soon!
This gives a lot of beginner inexperienced guys, who might think they are too short/ugly and are afraid to approach, more confidence to go out, and try to approach girls and see for themselves/test it out.
I agree
based zyzz pfp
I disagree heavily with your first epiphany
To your point, there's a vast range of rejection. I've made a fool of myself--thats rejection. But a girl having a boyfriend, being flattered by an approach is hardly a failure at all. Failure is subjective. I'll write it again failure is subjective
I did my first approach recently and you were one of the people that motivated me, thank you!
I've seen a few physically unattractive (by society's standards) guys get super hot girls. But those guys were extremely confident. I'd even say they were arrogant but who knows. That was a huge epiphany for me cuz they were dating girls that were taller than them, had more money than them and were younger than them. They just had natural game.
That gave me extra motivation and do cold approaching myself. I approached a girl in the park. Maaan!! I was trembling from nervousness and I couldn't keep a simple conversation going but she gave me her number and we went on a date the next day. The date was horrible cuz I still have no idea how to behave and what do on a date. So YES!!! Women will accept to go out with you even you do a lot of things wrong. I think the simple fact that you approached her during the day by itself says a lot about you.
Keep it going you'll eventually become natural
need to hear more of this. I always presumed guys got hooked up through mutual acquaintances (friends, family, etc.) or because of their social status. since approaching women isn't taught exclusively, those of us who didn't have a privileged upbringing are basically clueless.
Quick update! I’ve been going out and doing cold approach for three months now. I’ve got a lot of numbers and hooked up a couple of times. Every girl is an opportunity to learn something new. It’s all about consistency guys. Keep asking g girls out and eventually you’ll get to a point where many of them will agree.
Confidence comes from doing things even if you don't want to.
@@pablopesantez1273 👏 🙌 👏 🙌
One of the best channels on pick up
Thanks for the straightforward, sensible realistic information. 👍
Entitlement + Confidence +Self Amusement= Charisma and Charm
💯🤑
Love your candid honesty dude.
Love your style of videos that are not over the top. Super relatable in certain regards, and overall just a nice, relaxed honest conversation!
DOG... PEANUT BUTTER... PRESENT TO THE MOMENT
🙈
Your first lesson was probably my biggest takeaway when I had gone to Vegas for our bootcamp and is something that I need to hold on to. That attractive woman I approach will like me and be interested in me. All I have to do is learn to lead and maintain their interest.
Very good talk! Clear words, well understandable on the point.
I know enough about game to know that this is completely authentic and real. I love it!
Excellent info. Be strong men. SMILE on the approach.
This was really eye opening, thank you so much
I appreciate you. Its good getting advice that is both relevant and classy.
😂😂😂Getting kicked out of bars for being awkward!! That's fuckin levels right there
I've approached maybe over 100. You do sometimes get bad reactions. I've been told to "Fuck off" maybe twice? Once I offered my hand to shake after the name exchange and the girl said her hand was dirty and refused (she was waiting for a train). One girl was terrified (we were in a supermarket) and started walking backwards. The most common bad reaction will be they'll not say anything at all and just walk away, not acknowledge you. You also do have to keep in mind that women also are the most likely to have something called borderline personality disorder, you don't want that in your life. There are crazy women out there, you can't always tell by how they look. But, as a rough guide, numerous piercings, tattoo's and dyed hair indicate someone who possibly isn't stable.
the borderline part is absolutely funny. Without a doubt people will belive you when you say "some men out there are just crazy" … but say the same thing about women? No, believe women, no matter what.
The clean cut pretty ones are the most unstable and crazy!
lol the last part is genuinely funny, ever dated a PK?
And you missed out the good ones just because of your perception about girls in general
Don't ever marry a blonde unless the hair is natural. Every guy I know who married the blonde got divorced.
I can relate to this indirect stuff...... This was really helpful
10:47, I definitely agree with that. I wonder where that originated from? Nevertheless, very informative information, thank you A.J., and also looking forward to part 2!
Bro you keepin it real shout out to you G
Bro, this video is amazing. It 100% shows reality.
I am a very attractive man. Have been told that all my life. When I was young, girls were chasing me all the time. By the time I got to about 14 or something, I 'lost' all my powers.
All girls still found me very attractive, and many girls even opened me, but as soon as I started talking etc, my insecurities and lack of game were shining out and I could see the attraction fade away. Do you have any idea how bad it feels when girls only like you up until the moment you actually make contact? That was my experience for many years.
After learning game, this changed a lot and although I need to work on many things still, I am now able to actually make things happen.
Looks matter. They definitely do, but they get you only so far. For me it was easy to get noticed, that is the power of looks, but if you can't go on after that, then looks don't matter anymore. That is my message to guys thinking looks and status etc is all women care about. It is not.
I feel this 100% except I peaked at at 12... Thats when looks matter less for women and you better have real social skills and know how to tell a story
... well said Man! I also had (still have work in honing these skills, lol) the same issue, looks but no game, maybe cause I've been really shy most of my life, plus I felt awkward cold talking to girls out of the blue, now I'm a lot more open and approach ppl more, but this has also been the "story of my life" so the message to all is to get outta your shell and even have an alter ego, if possible (even a bit arrogant in the game), and prepare yourself mentally to go get after it, become that better version of yourself man and the sky is the limit!... Work on "Believing in yourself!" and everything else should fall into place!... 💯👊🤠
yes i know how bad it feels, im autistic and a model, i never got sucsess and im in my mid 40s , never had a gf, and now its too late, im one of the few guys that know your pain, now i blame myself for not aproaching even when i had an easy chance because id been rejected by women that liked me before, i hate myself and the pain is overtaking my life
@@mcpartridgeboy I understand what you're feeling. But there is a way out of all misery. You can either choose to still go for it and do game etc, or you can choose to let it go. When you let it go and just focus on other things in your life consciously, you will find that you actually never needed girls that much. I mean, I know you would want to, just as I did, but I also really wanted a Ford Mustang. I never got that too. Remember that the more you give something thought, the stronger the feelings attached to it become. So when you decide to stop caring about what happens with you and girls, you will let go of the emotions with it as well. Most of our emotions are formed by how we look at problems, so when you stop viewing it as a problem, you stop feeling bad about it. That is what I learned myself. Right now I really do not care if I end up alone or not. I actually even view being alone the preferred outcome since I am introverted and realllyyyy enjoy my alone time. Hope this helps
@@SuperDaxos thanks, it did help a little but i still feel awful, its hard to forgive myself and i cant sleep because im thinking all the time, its too late for me anyway im nearly 50 now.
Really great explanation, bravooo.
Thanks Avery I’ve been watching your videos and did my first two approaches today. They both had a boyfriend but even so I can tell I made there day by going up and telling them they looked cute.
Well done, thanks for the insight.
Nice video quality man
Man, talking from my experience your 100 % right about everything. And that core belief about ones unattractiveness hits home
Crazy to see your videos and also seen you real life while I was in Vegas. AG is legit at going out, saw him by himself in Vegas
@Nicholas H 😂😂 how'd you come to that conclusion player
❤ Hello‼️ Beautiful woman here! Tall, blonde, curvy.😘 I'm a doctor who cares for the hearts and minds of the US military! I served, too! Handsome? Great guy? I'm right here! No need to speak to thousands of women. Just this woman! Wish me a happy birthday 🎂! 🥰
Happy birthday 🎉
@@MiddleAgedAdventurer Thank you!!! 😁😁😁
weird jennifer
@@Kitties-of-Doom That's right. Where do we send our personal info and credit card number, eh?
@@mtlicq 😆😆😆
Damn solid video! It’s great to hear the perspective of your clients.
this is good advice for people who isent really open to new people
Thanks for sharing 💗💕🔥
Love dis content 👌
@MYSTIC soz I don't understand what you mean
Excellent video
The weird thing is there are no shortcuts
My guy with the camera cuts 🎉
Yo, I can't afford a bootcamp, but how much would it cost for you to look at and critique some infield footage of me?
I'm gonna try to be more vulnerable to see how it works, 'cause I've always had the impression that being directed is not more than a quick way to get their ego inflated. Thank you for bringing something different.
Good insights. Remember that a lot of women will feel flattered you found them desirable enough to risk the pain of rejection.
I disagree with #2. I see no advantage in telling a brand new girl that you think she’s attractive, especially to a beautiful woman. She hears that all the time, and it makes you no different than 1,000 other guys she’s met this year. If you feel the need to compliment her - compliment her ideas, or career, or charm - anything BUT her looks.
This
exactly
Yes, not her *looks*, but compliment things she *choose* like how she did her hair or something *specific* about her look/outfit you find flatters her. It says you like the way she looks because of who she is, not what she is.
But bro I love your channel and I’ve watched so many dating channels and you’re probably one of the best coz of your amazing psychology... but thing is what if we’re not in your country how am supposed to learn from you? Anyway you can start posting short tips and advice or lessons that you do with your clients? Anyway I can be a master but don’t live in your country and possible cannot do boot camps with you?
Thank u for sharing
hey man u should do a highpass filter on the audio cause theres a loud bass hum
The idea of approaching asking for direction 3 strange girls everyday to have courage furthering the conversation excite me, the idea of possible motivate me
Testifyyyyyy myyyy brothaaaa
Did you learn that indirect is the best game?
I love the honesty and authenticity of this guy👏👌
I don't know if this is typical but I've also felt like after one day of going for numbers sometimes it's good to just go out and flirt and not close on purpose just to sort of test reactions without any actual purpose other than to relax and socialize. I think guys who get too into PUA can sometimes become too about it and it can become a chore
Facts
I agree,I went to a mall yesterday and socialised with most of the people working at the different stores,men and women,I feel my social skills increased by a lot .I noticed a couple of females making direct eye contact with me and touching or playing with their hair right at the exact moment we looked at each other,I didn't ask their numbers or approached them though cause I wasn't interested in them but yeah the whole pua mentality I am not a huge fan of,I want to be myself and improve myself as much as possible and only go and approach women that I find hot or attractive, couple of days ago I saw this pretty good looking female at Marshalls but I was damn hesitant to approach cause of being unsure what she would have said,she only looked at me twice from a distance,it was 2 quick side glances no smiles,not sure if she the serious or shy type either,I think those are tricky to read.
SAM DARNOLD with the TD man.. that anxiety video made me a fan, every coach I liked and found valuable info had a come up story tay with his bad looks as a kid overbite an Kyle with his lost parents your anxiety.. Im no coach an got no plans but believe in my potential I got a story as well as you guys.. LOL That marvel spoke to me that’s me we all got a story like I said, what’s our plan crumble another year or stay in the fight you vs you battle your anxiety fears doubts hesitation. Approach approach and socialize. Have fun love socializing go for the love and fun for socializing meeting new people . Forget being perfect an getting the number. Blessed for your vid’s thank you for your struggles and wisdom.
Main rule I learned: don't take rejection personally. For whatever reason, you are not what she's looking for. It's not that your game is bad, or you're unattractive, or whatever. You're just not her type. Move on & keep your chin up.
or simply she's already set, not in the market anymore even if you're her type
10 thousand women!?? Stop the cap! 🤦🏼♂️
you're so wise bro
I’ve approached 100’s of women over the past month and I’ve had them laughing and even had my friends watch the whole thing. I’ve noticed it’s extremely easy to get a phone number and what seems like a really good interaction. However, out of the last 50 #’s I’ve gotten I’ve only had maybe 4 actually text back. At this point I’m really kind of baffled.
This is weird, were I have different Situation
Hey dude curious if you've been able to diagnose the issue yet?
The method is giving them YOUR number, this means whenever you actually get a text you know they are into you and all the ones that don’t message you, then whatever.
Curious question , roughly what age were the women you were approaching?
This is facts. I get hella numbers and no text backs at times, or the texts don’t lead to anything. Still you gotta keep trying I’m starting to realize. Mostly because all it takes is one to change shit. So just keep going
still doing the free coaching call? I don't see it
When did you first think that you’d had the knowledge and experience to be a dating coach? How long into your journey of approaching? Love the content bro!
Their friends and other guys started to ask them for advice and coaching
He says that if you put your intentions out there it's better, but in my experience showing your attraction makes women turn away :(
I wish I could see my self from another person's point of view when they first meet me and see what what what I could be doing wrong
I was a decent pickup artist in the 1970s. Everything I learned was by trial and error. I was a Pharmaceutical sales rep for 11 years and talked to women all day, every day. The easiest pickups I had were the girls who were BIPOLAR and in their manic mood. They were insanely horny and it was completely obvious to me. The number one thing I learned was the same thing all professional actors learn and that is to be completely ignorant of the camera. I have zero stage fright. I am now 71 and have been divorced for a year. All of my skills are still there.
👌🏻
That's very interesting, I think it's great advice and I get the feeling that you really know what you are talking about too!
Thanks for sharing.
#True “zero stage fright”
Any possible chance you can do a month long boot camp? Feel like a weekend won't be enough to gain enough experience
I sometimes do two week bootcamps but rarely a full month.
The Journey is the destination😎
Focus on the approach not the outcome💯
@@tonyxivanov totally agree. In my personal experience getting only rejections lead a friend of mine to totally quit approaching, another one to take long pauses and has eroded a lot of my motivation
@@tonyxivanov it's true
BUT you have to suffer that stage if you want to reach the next one
I think for me it took me more or less like 2 months of sucking when I started to then get my first instant date and a kiss
(I started just approaching 5 girls per day every day)
But yeah those first months/ first approaches are very depressing tbh
@@tonyxivanov that is a very unique mindset, I look forward to hearing more about your wins and future successes🙌
@@Trump-A-Bad-MF Momentum + Massive Action = Results
Well done bro!
KEEP IT UP! 🤩🔥🔥🔥💯
Good video thanks.
To be fair being tall helps u fairly since heightism is so bad. But we still rock on don't we🤘 Nice video btw.
Did you decide in a new date for the release of your course?
I’m waiting to announce it until everything is uploaded to ensure it goes smoothly - most likely in one to two weeks
This kid's gunna be just fine...
Sir a women was in to me ar that time I don't know game and after some time another guy in my area stole my girl he has some practical experience with girls. Now 8am trying to study game by following Todd's channel your channel single guy etc 8am also reading Neil strass game after that I will read rules of game mystery method etc I have got enough leverage sir what can I do either to Attract the same girl or move forward sometimes I feel to go and beat up that guy. Sad story man
PLEASE, elaborate more on the part of being more direct, you did it well, but I feel like you can dive into specific scenarios and situations.
I have switched my game because I was once TOO direct, giving away my intentions right off the bat... once I decided to be more indirect, it was harder for me to transition to being direct, and I think this is where my error lies, where either the women sense TOO much interest at first or not enough interest(when I'm being "indirect").
I'm quite sure, that when you verbally open direct, it's more of a non verbal level when it comes to showing too much intent.
So from my experience you can absolutely open a set direct like i really find you attractive when conveying the correct things non verbally. Even then that's not too much intent, but the right amount
Yeah it can be tricky at times,some women like it when you are direct and others like indirect.
You learned that it's over for you bro.
Wow you're the real deal
This is a great video because it is uplifting and gives confidence. The black and red pill videos are super dark, manipulative, and depressing. This video show a much better way to move forward in life.
How old are you AG! 10,000 is a big accomplishment (I'm at 1500-2000). Awesome lessons!
How many were successful lays?
@@codingsingh4156 By focusing on the lays, you're missing the big picture of what cold approach is about. Connecting with women and improving your social skills.
How do you possibly have time for anything else. Also where do you go to find that men attractive women to approach. I'll be lucky if I find one or two a day
He does pick up coaching ... live, in front of his students, too. Thats how.
This is very true.
I think the "making your intentions clear" being creepy comes from anime. You see guys like master Roshi get called pervert and never get action then you have the aloof quiet kid with a harem of babes orbitting him.
I’m 40 years old man. But sometimes I feel a bit older when I make street approach. Because some cases girls that I approach says they’re only 17 years old and that’s makes me quite weird. I can’t believe what was going on . How they realise my age. So I’m not sure better be leaving street approach because of my age 😢
if i got to put a tittle to this video, it would be REVELATIONS.
I wonder how much time took a guy destroy completly this Limiting Beliefs ?? is about an average time lapse for everyone ... or every guy needs different times ??
It's a numbers game.😂
Hi Avery , maybe you will explain this later , what differenciate 5 pillars of success and God mode ?
I mean God mode it's like an update , or somethings complementary ?
Regards
I was shy as shit but I got approached by a decent amount of girls in high school and college. Some weren’t my type and I ended being the one to reject a couple advances. My shy guys, there’s hope. The woman I’m now married to actually approached me. I’ve done approaches in the past and some of them paid off, but generally I just did my thing, went about my day, pursued interests, and they came to me (or we bumped into each other mutually during said activity, in some cases). If you want to pursue, then do it, but there’s more than one way to go about it, especially if you’re not oblivious to women’s flirts.
If I have no job and live out of my Ford explorer is there any point in approaching woman? Cus I've counted myself out since I've been in this position.
Hypothetically you could make that work but you have higher priorities. Get some money man, that's what you should focus on 24 hours a day for now
Avery have you ever met a girl that you basically felt she was out of your league when you were younger or just somebody you werent prepared to date but then talked to her again later after you had more confidence or experience?
Yeah there was a high school crush who I pulled years later. Turned out she wasn’t nearly as special as I thought
@@aghayden That's interesting because I noticed that the more I was around certain girls after I met them they weren't as nice as I originally thought. That is why it isn't good for guys to look at a certain girl as a prize. If she knows a guy really likes her she probably won't be that interested in him. If tried to tell certain guys this to no luck.
The best part of this video is 3:10. I couldn’t agree more
The people who say getting laid doesn’t matter are usually the guys who are just rationalizing the fact that they can’t get laid.
11:13 you got that belief from the culture we live in 100%. We came up in a time period of hyper realism on the internet and it makes us have these subconscious beliefs
I have slept with around 300 women, male late 30s. I have come to similar conclusions. To the point where I no longer care about getting laid or dating, this is a deep down feeling now and it is very freeing. I just do what I want nowadays no pressure on myself to do things. I love shitting myself up nowadays with climbing and martial arts
This guy has just put so many things into words I have experienced especially about the excuses guys make. Doesn’t really even matter how you look as a dude. It’s about confidence which come from trying and accepting the fact not all girls will like you and some will
I view approaching as not rejection avoidance. There is no true rejection because in reality we are looking for a girl who likes us so if a girl does not like you that is not the girl for you onto the next one
I agree also once you have approached enough chicks I prefer to go indirect now it’s more fun makes it more challenging
god damn goals asf 4 me
do you guys think it's awkward for a 30 years old guy start approaching random women, to me feels like they will find me creepy, primary age i want to attract is 22-27 because younger than that i find childish
u dont should approach, not bc of your age.. but it doesnt work very well.. a woman spot a men they like withing micro seconds, they already spotted u before u spotter her, they very very sharp.. most men dont know this... A woman does alway the invitation, the are checking u out, want to create a eye contact, or the best thing the smile at you.. if u dont get these signs, do not approach.. or u have to have a very good reason to do.. and have luck.. go to bars, or do group meetings.. that the best way if u are average looking.. And your age doesnt matter, dont be insecure, your age only matters for a girl if u are creating that problem..
I am surprised it took that long and that many.
This might be a stupid question but should I lie about my age? Like I'm almost 30 but I look like I'm still in high school
No, I have before and dated a hot law student, caught feelings told her how old I actually was, guess what she dumped me . Just be honest
Yeah if you look super young , no issue . They do it all the time besides we can identify as anything in 2024. Man woman cat whatever .
Well I had a lot more success with the indirect method than with the direct one. I guess it depends, some have more success with one method, others with a different one.
Direct approach can seem like a player.
Mark my words: this guy is the next Richard La Ruina.
YES VERY NICE! Your interpretation is extremely fascinating! Let me ask you something, your name is Rod, but do you like to party?🥳
First lesson at 4:20
Great insights. 1. Getting laid will not make you happy and fix all all problems. (Maybe this will reduce some pressure for some approaching). 2. Being expressive is lot more memorable. 3. It is a numbers game. Btw, your shirt is cool. 😃
I love it
ty
he sounds real
He approached 10,000 women and was rejected by 11,000.
Sick burn
What is that deep void that you have? I'm curious
Probably God