Oh how I've always longed for a relationship like what you two described. I tried for 12 years with my wife but she just wouldn't open up about sex. I couldn't even hold her hand. She was too embarrassed to even say the word "sex" out loud - so doing these kinds of steps was impossible in our situation. We tried so many things. Counseling, seeking advice from pastors, doctors, etc. Unfortunately after 3 kids there was nothing left between the two of us, though I tried to do so much for her in every way you can imagine. Trying to make her interested in a relationship with me again. Just wanted her to actually care about me in some way, any way, ya know? She'd get so excited about every little thing the kids or pets would do, but nothing I did seemed to matter. In the end, she was just done and bored with me and left. Now, sadly, I can't have this kind of God-designed relationship at all. And my heart breaks. If I find someone else it would be considered a sin to marry and have an intimate relationship with them, because I'd be sinning against God due to that woman not being my original wife. At least that's my understanding of scripture. And I want God first and foremost above all else. So I'm kinda stuck having to live a celibate life from here on out. Just kinda sucks, ya know? 🤷♂️ 😥
From my understanding of the scriptures and a study I listened to if you have tried reconciliation until you're sure she won't come back because of her hardness of heart than she has neglected the marriage. I don't know that God would require you to stay single. That's only from listening to a study a pastor did on it, obviously you would have to have your own conviction. But hardness of heart is one reason Moses allowed divorce in the old covenant so... I'm sorry to hear your story though. Way too many stories like that our there. May God bless you for loving your wife and trying to make it work through all that.
Thank you both so much for sharing the most intimate parts of your life. It means so much to us out here feeling alone in our struggles. Your fierce marriage podcast has helped me and my husband so much. He understands me better now because of things Selena has explained about women that I didn't know how to explain about myself! Thank you for always pointing back the God. You are both a blessing❤
Thank you so much for your kindness and encouraging words. I sent this to my husband who is leaving us after 18 yrs together bc I can’t party like he wants to. When I became a mother it changed me I had to grow up and be a parent and he didn’t like that. Thank you so much for your guidance and kindness. God bless you and your beautiful family
This was so enlightening! My wife and I have been struggling with having a healthy and consistent sex life, and we don't even have kids yet. I think this will help us articulate, understand, and support each other so much better. Thank you for the encouragement and suggestions!
Absolutely, and we're glad it's proving helpful. Communication is the BIGGEST thing couples need to work through in this area: when to communicate, the freedom to share openly, being loving throughout, and revisiting the conversation regularly. Keep going, Clay!
I really love this conversation because it’s not just realistic-it’s optimistic. With 4 kids between 10 -1 years old, this is an honest perspective. I also love The Office reference because that show was my true first love before my husband lol
Wow I just found out today there's now a RUclips channel. 🙌 this is super exciting!!! I'm so glad u guys talk about these things. My husband and I might be expecting out first kid rn. Tbh 😄 Gbu guys & ur fam
Thankyou guys for you wisdom that you bring to the subject of sex and all the other topics you cover. Weve found it a struggle too with young ones 9 and 10 and then big ones 18, 22, 24 they are up all night! Lock on the door for us, it can still feel weird to know they are awake too and if they try the door handle they are old enough to join up the dots 😵🤯🤣
It's ok for your children to know you have a healthy intimate life. It may help them in their marriage to know that. Obviously try to dull noises and all that cause it can be a bit weird! My 8 year old has already asked some very embarrassing questions, but we do all we can to make it private, but still have a healthy intimate life. A child should know that intimacy in marriage is important and a priority. It isn't going to hurt a child to know their married parents are intimate in that way at some point. They are very good at connecting dots though 😂
Oh how I've always longed for a relationship like what you two described. I tried for 12 years with my wife but she just wouldn't open up about sex. I couldn't even hold her hand. She was too embarrassed to even say the word "sex" out loud - so doing these kinds of steps was impossible in our situation. We tried so many things. Counseling, seeking advice from pastors, doctors, etc. Unfortunately after 3 kids there was nothing left between the two of us, though I tried to do so much for her in every way you can imagine. Trying to make her interested in a relationship with me again. Just wanted her to actually care about me in some way, any way, ya know? She'd get so excited about every little thing the kids or pets would do, but nothing I did seemed to matter. In the end, she was just done and bored with me and left.
Now, sadly, I can't have this kind of God-designed relationship at all. And my heart breaks. If I find someone else it would be considered a sin to marry and have an intimate relationship with them, because I'd be sinning against God due to that woman not being my original wife. At least that's my understanding of scripture. And I want God first and foremost above all else. So I'm kinda stuck having to live a celibate life from here on out. Just kinda sucks, ya know? 🤷♂️ 😥
From my understanding of the scriptures and a study I listened to if you have tried reconciliation until you're sure she won't come back because of her hardness of heart than she has neglected the marriage. I don't know that God would require you to stay single. That's only from listening to a study a pastor did on it, obviously you would have to have your own conviction. But hardness of heart is one reason Moses allowed divorce in the old covenant so... I'm sorry to hear your story though. Way too many stories like that our there. May God bless you for loving your wife and trying to make it work through all that.
@@christys.3912 Thank you for that.
Always love how y’all bring everything back to The Bible!! Have been listening to your podcast for a few years and always enjoy them!
We'll continue to do just that! By God's grace... thx for listening all these years and for watching here!
Looks like I’m lucky number one for this new episode! Thanks ahead of time keep up the good work👍👍
Awesome, and thanks Tyler!
Thank you both so much for sharing the most intimate parts of your life. It means so much to us out here feeling alone in our struggles. Your fierce marriage podcast has helped me and my husband so much. He understands me better now because of things Selena has explained about women that I didn't know how to explain about myself! Thank you for always pointing back the God. You are both a blessing❤
Thank you so much for your kindness and encouraging words. I sent this to my husband who is leaving us after 18 yrs together bc I can’t party like he wants to. When I became a mother it changed me I had to grow up and be a parent and he didn’t like that. Thank you so much for your guidance and kindness. God bless you and your beautiful family
So sorry to hear this, Patricia. I (Ryan) hope his heart is softened and he stays to fight alongside you for your marriage.
This was so enlightening! My wife and I have been struggling with having a healthy and consistent sex life, and we don't even have kids yet. I think this will help us articulate, understand, and support each other so much better. Thank you for the encouragement and suggestions!
Absolutely, and we're glad it's proving helpful. Communication is the BIGGEST thing couples need to work through in this area: when to communicate, the freedom to share openly, being loving throughout, and revisiting the conversation regularly. Keep going, Clay!
I really love this conversation because it’s not just realistic-it’s optimistic. With 4 kids between 10 -1 years old, this is an honest perspective.
I also love The Office reference because that show was my true first love before my husband lol
Wow I just found out today there's now a RUclips channel. 🙌 this is super exciting!!! I'm so glad u guys talk about these things. My husband and I might be expecting out first kid rn. Tbh 😄 Gbu guys & ur fam
Thanks for all you guys do!
Our pleasure!
Thankyou guys for you wisdom that you bring to the subject of sex and all the other topics you cover. Weve found it a struggle too with young ones 9 and 10 and then big ones 18, 22, 24 they are up all night! Lock on the door for us, it can still feel weird to know they are awake too and if they try the door handle they are old enough to join up the dots 😵🤯🤣
It's ok for your children to know you have a healthy intimate life. It may help them in their marriage to know that. Obviously try to dull noises and all that cause it can be a bit weird! My 8 year old has already asked some very embarrassing questions, but we do all we can to make it private, but still have a healthy intimate life. A child should know that intimacy in marriage is important and a priority. It isn't going to hurt a child to know their married parents are intimate in that way at some point. They are very good at connecting dots though 😂
I try to talk to my husband about my desire/need for sexual intimacy but it gets him fristrated
Women value kids more than spouse. That's the problem. Women idolize kids.
What's wrong with you?
Nothing wrong with me it's the truth. Women are in marriage to have kids.