@Pro Me The US a lot of research disagrees with you. Fathers have a huge impact on both females and males. W/O a father in the home. Males are more likely to drop out of school, not be in their children's lives and end up in jail. For girls, fathers will be a role model for future husband's and how they allow men to treat them. Children are more likely to suffer from abuse from non- related men/ women in the home. Children are also more likely to feel they are unworthy of love if the father is absent.
"Marriage is for children, not for adults. They're the primary target of rank order importance." Something my parents never understood. This is really a massive problem in Western society. People actually thinking marriage is about them.
It is true, but it is complicated because children need parents who are reasonably happy together and individually. So just being a robot that puts the child first is not enough. The child will later have relationships that mirror the relationship between the mother and father. Making sure one self and ones partner is a good functional loving unit is part of putting the child first.
I partially agree. If a couple is no longer in good terms and they are not working to solve their issues, the toxicity is absorbed by their children who are like sponges. Children need a good example of a partnership, they dont need martyrs as parents. In my eyes there are too many people married with the wrong person who would do amazing the moment they weren’t married anymore. My parents chose to stay together despite their so many incompatibility issues and their 0 willingness to solve them through therapy and I can tell you, my sister and I have no children. We dont want to transfer our traumas onto the next generation.
Sexual activity involves a trinity, the man, the woman and the child, you have to respect all three or conflicts will arise. I'm not saying I know your parents, but I suspect they ascribe to a more sterile approach to what sex is due to a perverse education given by government school, which then created a conflict with reality.
@@mariasoulastrology8169 Yea, I get that perspective as well. It really feels like a roll of the dice to be honest. Some people work out, and some people just don't want to try. Its honestly the worse when a divorce happens and the child is still developing (as I was). I think I turned out okay because I got a ton of attention from my grandparents and especially my grandfather. But not everyone has that privilege. I'm likely not even going to get married until I have a stable income- such that my spouse wouldn't even have to work a job if she didn't want to (she can if she wants optionally) so as to make things less complicated.
Warren displaying Jordan's book next to his own is such a subtle show of admiration, a very lovely gesture. Very telling of the type of person he is, caring and humble.
@@RoddyPipersCorneas thank you. I'm so very glad your father took the brunt of life on the chin for his kids, the way every man should. All I can hope is that when my kids look back on their life they can say "dad did good"
19:22 - "Anger is vulnerability masked and the moment you see your partner as angry, look at the vulnerability that created that anger - the possibility they felt rejected, the possibility they felt misunderstood...that somethings bothering them over and over again but it been ignored and every time they say what's bothering them there's a response, a disconnect that cuts them off and interrupts them before they finish their full feeling"
That reminded me also of something that stuck in my mind from Jordan's "Beyond Order", the chapter about "not hiding unwanted things in the fog": He observed that anger, and afterwards tears, can be a sort of testing how much you are willing to put up with, how much you actually care about your partner. If you can listen and press beyond the anger, beyond the tears, you get to the bottom of things (which the person who is angry or starts to cry hasn't fully articulated yet) and can start sorting them out.
If you try to deal with the vulnerability or fear that inspired the rage, you may unwittingly encourage the rage. If someone hits you and then you try to understand why and try to help that person feel less vulnerable, you will only encourage them to hit you again. You can help children this way because you are bigger and more powerful. You must not teach women or children to "understand" a man's aggressive behavior as something other than it is. You must teach them that expressing feelings that way is wrong. When you "understand" violence, you create a sense of entitlement to hurt people with words or fists or weapons. You cannot reward violence. Women have been taught to condone violence from men and to look at the fear or vulnerability and take responsibility for it since the beginning of time. Where I grew up and during those years, women were understanding and moral, and men indulged in very aggressive behaviors and were allowed to do so because they were men and they had responsibilities while their wives stayed home doing "nothing." They drank, hit their wives, beat their children, got into fights, got fired repeatedly, disappeared for weeks at a time, and we were to understand how hard it was for them and not to upset them.. This is how we allow violent behavior to control us. It is how we express our feelings that matter. Warren Farrell forgets that over and over. Fear of rejection is not a reason to hurt women, but for some reason he has always blamed women. Women are not obliged to manage the feelings of any man who approaches. Men are obliged to manage their feelings just as everyone else is. Aggression does not belong in the family. The family has to be a safe place.
@@nancynord260 I agree that you have a point there. When "to understand all" becomes "to excuse all" we're heading down a dark road. The context which my original comment referred to wasn't about physical violence but verbal anger masking disappointment in partners. I heard once somebody say that "behind every anger/violence is a hurt child", and I think that might be true in some cases, yet I also believe that is predicated on the naive assumption that men is essentially good, which always makes me a bit sceptical when I hear something like that. We should definitely be more sophisticated.
happy that Mr.Peterson has the strong Male support he has, but to all the people who criticize him: HI, still a woman, still benefiting. found better confidence through him then all the crummy marry sues in media.
I was huge fan from first sight, and I have never understood why MSM say women don't like him. What's not to like? He's a perfect gentleman. He is really really smart. He likes to talk for hours about mythology and psychology and why everything is, but he is still an excellent listener. He makes men interested in those very interesting subjects so that we can talk with them about it (yes finally!). He even makes men want to clean up after themselves, treat their partners as partners, and talk about their dreams, and how they can become better versions of themselves (he is turning them into romantic movie heroes for our benefit). He is leading by example and is the perfect son who loves and speaks highly of his mother. He is the perfect husband, who loves and is faithful to his wife and he speaks very highly of her with much love and admiration. He is the perfect father and loves his daughter and is full of admiration for her accomplishments (and he loves his son and father and speaks highly of them too). He's got an excellent sense of humour. He's very entertaining. He is handsome. He is not a wimp. WHY would any woman not like that?
@@mariasoulastrology8169 Great question. I believe the answer in part is that we're moving through an era in which women are under enormous pressure to shun and condemn male mentors and potential male partners who refuse to define themselves according to identity politics. It's a bloody shame. By freeing me from those constraints outright, Dr Peterson effectively teaches me to think critically and courageously as a woman. And the more nuanced perspective that freedom gives me allows me to move forward *together with* the males in my life and at large. Also, as someone with a male twin whom I loved dearly and always sympathized with, I've found Peterson gives voice to the catch-22s of my brother's life. That helps me heal some of the effects of my brother's trauma that I shared by virtue of being his twin.
@@sheilac5319 beautifully said! I feel his lectures pretty much saved my life (or my mind and emotions) and I think for many of the same reasons that (some) men like him. He articulated where I had been lazy or sheepish in my reasoning and life is so much better on the other side of that.
@@cassandraotroy6325 sure he is, but DR does not describe all he is, and most DR's are nothing like what he is. It is like saying a martial arts expert can walk :)
This discussion was illuminating as a child of divorce. Even as a girl/woman/female this resonated with me and the difficulties I experienced and still experience as a child of divorced parents. Especially ones that could barely communicate with one another after the split. Thanks to JP for having difficult conversations.
Maybe people who feel a great passion for each other should marry...... but some get married for the wrong reason, they feel only friendship ...like roommates. If there was never love why do they marry just to manipulate the other person?
As someone whose parents are still together I can safely say these are not issues exclusive to officially broken families. You can have the exact same dysfunctions in an intact household where psychopathology runs rampant.
@@Illlium and that's certainly not something I'm denying- if 2 lunatics were to have a kid it may even be worse than 1 lunatic but we also know the likelihood of you having 100% lunatic parents is lower if you have 2 and the outcomes for 2 parent households are better in almost every measurable way across society.
@@haghendowdy4750 The point I'm trying to make here is: just because parents are still married doesn't mean the family isn't broken. Sometimes it's actually worse when you have two people enabling and exacerbating each other's psychopathology. And I do mean both worse for the kids and for parents, although in my case it was only the kids part. Sort of like what you would experience in a dysfunctional post-divorce family where children are pawns in a game to get at each other, except the kids are always there to soak up all the garbage parents have to unload from dealing with each other.
As a single mum I was very well aware that not having a father in the home harmed my sons. The most important issue for me was to mitigate the harm as much as possible, and I would have appreciated more public information and debate on this topic. Of course it hurts when you are reminded that your divorce (lacking knowledge about choosing wisely) hurts your children, and getting reminded can trigger very sad and bad emotions and reactions, but putting the head in the sand, does not help my or others sons and daughters!!
This was a hard discussion to listen to as a single mom. My son's father has not reached a level of maturity or depth of love to fully embrace his responsibility. I am left to try to cover over his selfishness and horrible choices so that my son does not internalize all that. Then also, working endlessly to ensure our son has positive, strong men in his life. I pray the men in our culture will come to understand their vital role as monumental, sexy, & heroic!
@@heathersohappy2833 "My son's father has not reached a level of maturity or depth of love to fully embrace his responsibility" - so why in the hell do you have kids with such a man. There was a single mom in the comments complaining about the same stuff and she had 3 kids with the guy. At no point did she ever consider that maybe there was something wrong with her. So I ask you...why did you choose such a man to father your kids? What were you thinking? It is so common for women to simply blame men. Did you actually support him and help him grow or you sort of just expected him to do what you want him to do?
This couldn't have come at a better time. My son just started 1st grade. Now I have some idea of what he's up against and how to deal with it. TY for your work JBP!
Incredible. I love my husband and I love our sons. My husband and I have talked about many of these topics, and it's so good to hear some research and a lot of nuance behind our observations.
@@wyleecoyotee4252 Warren was a famous Feminist. He marched with Gloria Steinem in 70th!! He was the only man on the board of directors at NOW (National Organization of Women)!!! "Farrell initially came to prominence in the 1970s as a supporter of second wave feminism; he served on the New York City Board of the National Organization for Women (NOW). Farrell advocates for "a gender liberation movement", with "both sexes walking a mile in each other’s moccasins".[1]"
@@josephblowseph6123 A simplification, from my point of view, if I may. I have 2 adult sons, 1 grandson. I have been paying attention to the destruction of men for decades, commercials, sitcoms, movies, all disparaging even demonizing men of all ages, glorifying divorce, demonizing marriage, having children/parenthood, even if I were a mother of girls I would be paying attention to this destruction of men and boys, because as a mother, I would be hoping and praying for a man worthy of friendship and marriage for my daughters. The entire world needs men to make society workout for the best for everyone. 3rd wave feminism is the death of every civilization. There was a place for feminism when it started, it is useless even evil now. I hope women, young, single, married, gay, trans, whatever will begin to pay attention to the boy crisis and begin to love and care for our boys as if they are not "disposable". Women if you do not know about this crisis, you will fold under the pressure of the schools, and friends, propaganda from the media, and damage/fail the boys and men in your life for generations to come. Stop teaching your girls they can do anything a man can do. It's a lie!
19:20 "Anger is vulnerability masked and the moment you see your partner as angry, look at the vulnerability that created that anger." I heard this quote repeated in my head for the rest of the video. I am going to try to apply this to my own thinking about how I am perceived at home.
I've consumed hours upon hours of your lectures and discussions and I think this one might be my favorite. So poignant and relevant. These issues are the wedge that is creating the schism in the west. Love how energetic and dense the talk was yet still comprehensible. You and Warren work really well together, birds of a feather.
This interview is really interesting and engaging. I would hope Jordan looks into letting his guests finish their thoughts in future interviews. I am here because of his brilliance but also want to hear the guests. ✌🏿
I am 100% with you. Jordan of course understands the thoughts of his guest. So he just jumps in due to that. Though we can follow, I would like for them to say what’s on their mind fully.
True that it would be nice to hear the guest finish his channel of thought before being cut off. Much respect to Jordan for the work he is doing, this isn't a criticism just a healthy observation.
I felt the same way, there was quite a bit of discontinuity while the guest was trying to complete his thoughts, and Jordan interjects prematurely and goes into lecture mode; and as a listener the discontinuity makes it harder to piece the points together. I adore Jordan but I think perhaps in this one Jordan just felt very passionately about family, children, marriages, gender variance, men's issues, and couldn't hold his thoughts back.
@@AaronMetallion it also doesn't help when he has read the guests book and probably knows more about what he is going to say than we do. But yeah JP shut the hell up sometimes and let the guest fully articulate his thoughts. ❤
Thank you for brining these issues to light! I teach martial arts and it's very obvious young boys are craving physical challenges, male role models, and discipline.
I also see that as a problem though. Tomorrows leaders won’t be physical leaders. We need engineers and coders and deep thinkers. I have / had the immense desire to do physical activities. So I tried to be a professional skateboarder for a decade. In the end I decided to give it up. As fun as it was, the world doesn’t benefit much from me skateboarding. Or karate chopping. Or hitting the gym. Or firing a gun. The things that made men great in the past are now becoming antiquated. Of course I still stay physically active on the side. But competition in my field of work - as the results of women now entering the field - is so fierce. I’m lucky that I’m creative and highly educated. I’m doing really well in my field because my expertise is useful. I can’t say the same for many men who’s skill set is becoming obsolete. Soon truck driving will automated, as will most manual labour. On the upside, male nerds around the world are rejoicing. They won. Many of the jocks and male bullies from school that thought they would breeze through life have fallen behind and the geeks are excelling and changing the world. Yes some men will make a great career as athletes or but it’s winner takes all in that field. Only a few can really succeed. If I have a son that wants to be a professional athlete I won’t say not to try but I will make sure he goes to college and has a really solid plan B. Ideally I’d push college as plan A and athlete as plan B. Young boys need to learn to sit still and read books or these future men are going to be in trouble. I saw a video the other day of a robot Amazon is developing that will replace human workers almost entirely. It’s terrifying. Imagine 50% or more of men are suddenly out of work. That’s going to be bad news for everyone.
I would like for us to recognize the amazing blessing it is to have Jordan producing this deeply meaningful, technical content, and contrast that with a year ago when we were all concerned for his health and recovery. So grateful! Thank you Jordan Peterson!
Listening to Warren Farrel breaks my heart... Remembering all the things that went wrong in my upbringing. Thank you, Dr Warren Farrell, for sharing your work and thoughts this definitively will be of great help on my path to recover my father from the belly of my past. Thank you, Dr Jordan B Peterson, for having these great people on your podcast.
I couldn't handle teasing going into middle school. And boy did that make life a living hell. Once i learned to not take myself so seriously it helped me socially so immensely.
@Pro Me The US They didnt have many means to avoid me. Small 9 classroom 100 student school. Also the repercussions of physical violence could have been as bad if not worse than the bullying.
Literally nothing is taught in schools. Factor any polynomials or read some Shakespeare lately? That people think putting their child in front of a chick who never did anything in her life other than school, is going to teach their kids, is just astounding to me.
@@-whackd We always taught our kids ahead of the school lessons so they would be familiar with the material before the teacher presented it. We used Schaum’s Study Guide math books starting summer before 6th grade to teach algebra, geometry, algebra 2, trigonometry. It made algebra1 freshman year a breeze. Always tried to give the kids an advantage. That was their ‘white privilege’, parents who cared.
I am a simple man(not really but "let's say, eh"), I hear intro music - I laugh and remember 80s public television I see Jordan - I feel hope I see Warren - I feel valuable I hear introductions - I tear up a bit and feel grateful I hear 2 men talk for near 3 hours - and I believe fatherly love can maybe be part of western culture again in the future I love these two men and would like to send them virtual hugs and thanks for what they are doing, you both made my life better. This conversation makes the world better
As a female, I immensely appreciate the tools for human progress you share. Understanding differing strengths can be so potent when those differing strengths can come together and complement each other. So many are looking for a sane, inspiring role model and you have been that beacon of light for so many. Take care of yourself and family, we love you unconditionally.
I would love to see a book some time soon from Jordan with a title 10 rules to how be a parent!! Please do that, it would be really helpful for a lot of people.
Sorry, but I disagree. Jordan Peterson is, no doubt, a very intelligent man, but he is human. His 5th rule, when he mentions children, would suggest that he has unresolved issues, probably stemming from his own childhood. If he wrote such a book, i believe it would damage the readers relationship to their children and so damage the children themselves.
“You are perfectly suitable as a companion but in no way should your genetic material be able to propagate itself into the next generation.” I love how Jordan explains rejection, simple but chillingly accurate.
not really, this is rejection from a collective, this needs to be rephrased(although women are collectivists), but as a single woman something better would be "You are perfectly suitable as a companion but in no way should your genetic material to propagate in my gate, I hope you find someone for you as you are not what I am looking for"
@@RickC-rs7ny he was probably talking about it at the individual level. Wouldn't be so jejune to assume that one man can be rejected by all women. It's such a good example only at the individual level. Perhaps even exacerbates the fear of rejection now he's put it like that hahaha
@@RickC-rs7ny No, that would be different message. It's not that, the guy has to find someone else. But rather, be better than what he is now. So, he has better chances at passing down his genes.
This is the best of all your interviews you've ever done. I feel like this is a manifesto to understanding your role as a parent and part of a family, and really the hard work it takes to make it work.
Only wish that husband would have stepped up his support in parenting instead of going after other women and thus abandoning our family. Now, he repeatedly makes promises to his son, but breaks them. Unfortunately, not a good role model.
@@donnawoodford6641 Same here Donna. The father of my children did everything he could to destroy me and the children were very negatively affected. We did the 50/50 (or as close to that as possible), but in my case, and I suspect in other cases where one parent is a narcissist, 50/50 is not good for the children.
It's been a while since I've listened to the JBP podcast. Dr. Peterson is sounding much healthier than he did at the beginning of Season 4. I'm happy to see the 2+ hour long form format has returned.
I and my husband are now parents of a 6 months old boy. I am watching this for the third time and soaking up all the stuff. Thank you, dr. Peterson and dr. Farell. We believe we can produce a healthy boy with some guidance and oh what specific guidance you provide. Fathers are the best
This should be teach to all generations!!!❤️❤️❤️ my goodness!! With all the crap news and documentary no one dare to look into family dynamics and look to the source of all difficulties today. All boils down to the unit of the family, parents!!l
Warren Farrell is incredible, one of the best minds regarding male-female dynamics (he deserves more fame). I always learn something new from him. At 1:57:00 he makes amazing insights- society has an image built up on how to be an attractive man, but then once achieved, you’re not really human at that point.
Thanks for poiting this out. Wow! This might be related with the "self-less" acts from shonen heros. And, oddly enough, this are japanese shows, like Naruto or BNHA. The specific example of Izuku and his determination to risk his life in order to save those in danger. The hero's call. What Dr. Warren just find out is the negative side of that trait. The extreme where we just "die" reaching the top.
PS: Fun fact, in BNHA (Boku no Hero Academia) Izuku (the hero) is going throug this phase in the manga. He's been fighting crime all day long, reaching exhastion. He's been stop by their friends now. But the key to stop that behaivor is to be more selfish. Just like Bakugo (the deuteragonist, the second protagonist who just want to figth and win)
@@InkaHacker Interesting explanation, that makes sense. Also, even though this pertains to guys, I think women have faced a similar issue in the past in that society values skinny girls (therefore they starve themselves). Though I think society is becoming more accepting of non-skinny girls (but still dismissive of unsuccessful men) But, in my opinion you can still be attractive and not fall in society's conventionally attractive ideal. While I'm not into obese girls, I would prefer a girl with some curves rather than completely skinny.
@@cococrispys Society values women that appear healthy. Today in the West, this means slim women. Elsewhere and throughout history, this would have meant curvy women.
You're contradicting yourself in the PS. Being a hero is good. Slaving for the boss is bad and not heroic. Don't mix the two. "Fighting crime all day" is honorable. If you are a victim of the crime, would you want a selfish crime-fighter?! I think not.
This is as important as the Bible so far as I can formulate a value structure that is useful. I wish I could memorize every word and properly apply it in my life, with my family and in my community. I am so grateful for this content that Dr. Jordan Peterson is producing.
Where I live there are several single mums who laugh and joke about stopping the fathers of their children from seeing them. They take delight in the hurt they cause without realising the damage that's being done to their kids.. I agree wholeheartedly with your comment, we need more people to listen to this podcast..
That's tough. I've been there. I think at first I questioned if I'd done enough to be a good friend, but in time, I had to accept that sometimes it's complicated and ultimately the decision of the other person (i.e., not every person close to the deceased needs to feel guilty about everything). Good luck.
My brother committed suicide at 18, this was over 30 years ago and it still hurts every day. The loss to society that male suicide causes is staggering as is the personal loss it causes.. Stay strong..
Very important topic. I had a sociology professor who went in retirement. In her last speach in 2018, she said that the thing she was most concerned about was the declining performances of men in the university (Netherlands). Think about that.
THANK YOU, Dr Peterson and Dr Farrell! You are godsend, this exchange of knowledge, experiences, and insights is like rain to dry ground for many marriages and families in the broken world.
It is hard to believe any two and a half hour conversation could be fascinating throughout but this truly was. As a divorced father living 400 miles from his two sons for two decades, so much of this resonated and I am so proud we maintained a close and meaningful father/son relationship throughout in the face of all of the difficulties. It is tragic to hear how politicians know the problems but won't address them due to short term political expediency. As such, this situation can only get worse. Thank you for a wonderful podcast
Thank you so much for this interview Dr. Peterson. I am in an extremely difficult point in my life where in the span of a couple of months I found who I thought was the best possible woman and said yes to her demands for us to have a children and push forward through everything very quickly. Now less than a month ago she sends a message out of the blue over text saying that she’s leaving and never coming back and gave no reason for it. (thankfully she can’t go too far because she has a 10-year-old with a very minimal malevolent man that keeps her from moving out of the area or away from me) Things were stressful and difficult of course because she’s pregnant and has a lot of those hormones going on, and also we are in our 30s and she definitely has a lot of issues that are akin to PTSD and possibly bipolar issues. I knew this going in and I am absolutely up for the challenge but she has a tendency to run away from her problems and I believe this is why it blew up in our face and I am finding it difficult not to be resentful of her giving up. But this interview maps out what I can best do myself to be the best possible father and that’s what I need to hear right now. Thank you
Well, like it or not, it's just not a good idea to get involved with a woman with a kid or kids. Yeah, sometimes it works out and the couple even has their own kids but ... There were plenty of women out there.
This is truly fascinating. I've believed for a long time that fathers get a raw deal and they're undervalued. It takes two to make a baby, it should be obvious that both parents are needed.
I thank all the men in my family for teaching me how to respond to teasing. Personally, I prefer working with men as opposed to women specifically because they can take a joke. The discussion explains so much about the behaviour I have observed in younger people.
Practically every woman I have met in my life, says that they would rather work with men, or at least a work somewhere where the majority of co-workers are men. I wonder why?
I have been around more men in my life than women. I worked with my husband in construction & yes I have laid bricks, hauled bricks & made concrete. I would not advise it for women. Men, including my brother, father & son have taught me many things that I feel all women should have knowledge of. My husband died when I was 29. My sons were 9 & 10. I continued building for awhile because we had a great group of subs. The men that I was around working taught me many things. They were always helpful, respectful, trustworthy, thoughtful with no ill intentions. I will always appreciate their loyalty. A lot of women can be tricky & most with ill intentions. I have several great girl friends of many years who I trust & love dearly that helped me unconditionally. Loyalty & truthfulness are hard to find these days. Although I am older now, I have always loved feminine things, but more comfortable in jeans, t-shirt, boots & a work belt. I also love great tools & gadgets. We all need to change roles at times to understand & teach the opposite sex the how & why of our duties at work & home. I started teaching my sons how to sort laundry, cook & clean at an early age. We can all be left in the blink of an eye. It’s far from easy, but having knowledge of important things can make it easier. Women tend to not want this knowledge & I don’t know why.
Great point at 35:05. My daughter wanted a dog. Her mom said she will help out with food but Daddy will be in charge of vet bills (even though mommy made more money than dad does). So when my daughter approached me on the topic, I told her it involves a lot of responsibility and we're not getting one until we have saved at least $3000 in the bank for a startup dog fund , and not until she can consistently demonstrate responsibility by actually fulfilling her duties (cleaning up after herself, tidying up her room, helping around the house when asked and offering to help, and taking care of her smaller pets. Her desire somewhat fizzled after a week when it started to feel it was too much work.
Dr Peterson. I listened to all of your podcasts, some of them more times than the others. Thank you for your hardwork. I may not be a proud husband but i am a very proud father and daddy. I hope one day ill be able to fix my relationship with my wife. I dont even know at which point it went the wrong way. Ill keep working on myself. Have a great day and God bless you, sir.
Wow I just like how Warren maintains eye contact. It tells pretty much about how serious is the situation and things he is considering during his intervention.
Tbh i find it strange when in an online format (zoom, skype, etc). Id rather have the person looking at my face, rather than at the camera as i find that evokes more personal interactions (assuming of course that an inperson interview is impossible).
@@antibull4869 yes I totally agree with you. Looking at the screen would seem more natural. But still his eye contact is something you don't always see.
@@antibull4869 you can set up a teleprompter so you are seeing the persons face, but your eyeline is perfectly set to be in the camera lens. @saradietchy has a good video on how to do it, it helped us when we built the set for the What Kind of Internet Do You Want? series for @openindexproto and tbh, as the person in front of the camera looking into a teleprompter and the camera lens at the same time feels really natural, almost like you are in the same room with the person you are interviewing :)
This dialectic was magnificent! I wanted to pause to do some chores, and waited for a natural place to stop, But the conversation just kept developing!
My "boy scouts" group consisted of 6-7 girls and a guy that came out as gay a couple years later xD. Too much singing I didn't participate in and too little scouting indeed. Of course, as a teenager, I blamed myself and my shyness for feeling out of place. But it's all good, you live and eventually learn.
@@LordSantiagor ya the scouts have change i started in 92 and can say that the day they allowed girls in was it’s downfall, i’m really sorry you had that experience it breaks my heart. Mr. P seems pretty good at fixing things though, certainly saved my life
@@travisvollmer2907 I'm from Spain, so my experience is unrelated to the US organization anyway. This particular Scouts group was pretty wild and I have good memories overall.
A day don´t go by where i don´t think about offing myself at least once, and my life is not even that bad. Mostly its just due to boredom/loneliness or simply having to do the horrible shit we all have to do in life, like paying bills or attending long meetings. But yeah, you are not alone, school is also where i started getting these thoughts on a regular basis.
Where do those thoughts come from? I’m always picturing a demon sitting on my shoulder, whispering evil thoughts into my mind. Maybe that’s what St. Paul meant when he wrote, “Hold every thought captive.” and “Pray without ceasing.”
That could be true, just bc a thought begins with "I" doesn't mean it comes from you. Life is a gift, please don't hurt yourself. One old friend did during covid bc he was in bad pain and it left his family devastated. Ask God to give your life meaning
Traditional media will never be able to compete with the experience o listening for two hours to this giants talking from their vital experience and wisdom.
Thank you gentlemen! For helping me better articulate what I've known my whole life. I was raised by two parents properly. Through the viewing of the video, I couldn't help but to think how lucky I am to have the parents I've been blessed with! Mr Peterson, on behalf of all men.Good looking Ghee! What an asset you are to men the world over. Cheers! 🍻
Wow! How helpful this conversation is!!! At 79, I find I can be helpful to the kids I meet. I had parents that wanted to be helpful and fair, and most times they succeeded. My ignorance and needing to learn was the hindrance. They learned also. We had great conversations after I grew up, which is ongoing. Ask my kids…
Thank you Dr. Farrell for this conversation, and for being patient with our beloved Dr. P and his propensity for impatient rejoinders. It was wonderful conversation to have been a small part of. There are no words in any language suitable to express my gratitude to you, Dr Peterson, for this and all your work.
After watching jordan petersons lectures for 3 years now. I feel that i can comprehend the chain of thought which is going through in his mind and get my mind blown.
Just the thought of 'disposable men', indeed any 'disposable creature' affects me so profoundly I'm now weeping as if my heart is about to break. My ex husband behaved deplorably towards our son and me.I didn't take any money from him when we were divorced. Nor did I allow myself to say horrid, although true, things about his father. He spent weekends with his father, and to this day we have a cordial relationship. Even a letter of apology. As a result, my son is a decent, caring father. Believe me, in the long run, it's far,far easier to divorce in a civilised way. Despite all the financial and soul destroying things that happen along the way.
Oh man the peas. This is exactly what happens with me, my husband and our son. In fact my husband taught me that when he draws the hard lines with our son, our son actually adjusts much better than I expect. So then I remind myself that my son CAN adjust when a hard line is necessary to enforce.
@@charmingperson5280 Farrell is a famous Feminist. At least he was. * He marched with Gloria Steinem in 70th!! He is the only man ever who was on board of directors at NOW (National Organization for Women).
When I was about 19 I became really preoccupied by what a father does/is and also solidified my insistence that I did not want to be asingle mom for any reason (things happen, but I didn't want to have the attitude not caring about it). I think a lot about why it's important kids have their dads and as a woman how fo identify and appreciate that without being upset that it's different from my instincts. This talk was so helpful in articulating and explains some of that. I cannot thank you both enough
I am a 65 year old white American woman. I’ve raised 2 sons and two daughter in a divorce.I “discovered” you last week. I approve of your theories wholeheartedly.
I don't think men fear rejection these days. There's certain risks involved with asking or approaching women now if you are not good looking. You get labelled as creepy or weird. Also many men just don't see the point in chasing women anymore. It's just not worth it.
anything seems to serve as sexual assault these days, its a awful mine field the dating world. Comparing the climate I grew up in to today i would not trade for a second, and i feel bad for the youth of today, so awful everything these days.
There's also decreasing opportunity costs. Having a wife/gf is now less of a social marker. The enormous increase in the accessibility of porn also reduced the costs of single life a lot.
And how is that NOT rejection? It's rejection to the nth degree. It's not just "I would never mingle my genes with yours" any more, it's "I hereby publicly mark you as unfit for reproduction, and this brand you shall wear for all other women to see". The very reason it's not worth it is because of the increased risk of total rejection.
You're also forgetting in the 21st century you jack off to the most attractive women your imagination can conjure. If you can quell the motives of testosterone of course the incentive decreases. Literally curbing your own biology.
I was born in 1981 to two parents in Baltimore City. I have seen everything being discussed in this conversation firsthand. I don't think ppl outside of inner cities realize how quickly society can deteriorate. My neighborhood was amazing in 1988 and was a warzone by 1998. Fathers matter. Good men are the only ones that can keep the bad men away.
This is some good stuff. Eye opening. Also wanted to say I love how Dr Peterson always references Peter Pan and Pinocchio. I would expect him to have a Peter Pan painting somewhere in his home. Dr Peterson you are awesome. Never change.
Prepared all my life to learn and pass on culture/heritage, knowledge, wisdom, and understanding. Turns out there's a lack of willing recipients or the time to find it.
Did anyone else notice jordans expression and fast lift of the eye brows after he says ‘New York Times’ during his introduction of the guest at the start of the video? 🤣 oh boy. Had to laugh. Just love this guy and his openness.
@@markdouglas1601 nahh that's for sure a look of contempt, watch it again. You may disagree which is okay, but to me it was fairly blatant lol. Brief expression but one of negative emotion.
Here's what I believe to be true, Jordan Peterson is reading the résumé that the guest has provided and approved. Jordan Peterson has stated that he allows his guests on his podcast freedom to edit in or out certain things that they might not be happy with. But, that he likes the free flow of conversation to occur with as much naturalness as possible. You may be correct, because there was definitely a body language movement of 'raising the eyebrows' right after saying "The New York Times," along with a slight pause. What's more interesting to me, is in light of the slanderous article in the New York Times recently mischaracterizing Peterson, that he didn't make any explicit sarcastic comments, which we know he is inclined to do. So if anything, it shows his ability to have restraint and to focus on the guest and introducing the guest in a way that facilitates getting to the material versus some other agenda.
As an educator, I really appreciate this interview. No matter what educators do, we cannot replace strong, joint parenting. Boys get their self-confidence from male role models. How can we expect them to excel when there is no motivation? At the same time, though, it is better to not have a father if the father is abusive, addicted to a substance, or manipulative. These really destroy our young boys.
Unfortunately for me and my brother my dad has some of those qualities to a certain degree (even though he wasn’t addicted to drugs he was addicted to cigarettes) and I say unfortunately because I could see a lot of those qualities in myself and my brother, but the difference between us and him is that neither one of us are addicted to anything and although our tempers are pretty bad it has never reached to the point of abusing others like it did with my dad. Interestingly enough The difference between your brother inside he doesn’t seem to notice that he has those qualities, I am the other hand even though I do notice those qualities and I do try to work on them they always seem to come out. I bet of a sweet note me being a woman i’m always concerned that the whole woman marrying men who are like their fathers May end up being true in my case. Anyways sorry for unloading all of this on you.
@@Illlium not true. Most psychopaths are males, most dark triads are males. Looks at the brain scan results of the Game Theory, where most females have dopamine spikes when both players cooperate while most males have dopamine spikes when they cheat and get away with it. Also, females tend to be more agreeable which means they are more likely to be manipulated. Men love to project their own flaws into women.
would you rather be stuck in a dead end warehouse job or be dead and never have to be a failure again.... good thing family court decided i am worthless
Thank you for this much needed conversation! I am a single mother of four sons and I can only agree with your thoughts. Boys need their fathers , no matter what has happened before. Moms and dads are responsible to have a forgiving heart to each other, especially after divorce. I know what I am talking about and I am glad we took the chance. If we as women don’t honor the men and their special purpose, we will not get our freedom from any form of oppression or misuse, we are longing for. Though One thing as a Christian, I do not agree: marriage is not only for the children, marriage is a divine covenant with God and therefore even holds much more accountability to it. Genesis 1 and 2 is beautifully describing it , even better in the original Hebrew.
I am almost two years divorced, this episode makes me sad and worried. I will pray to be a better Dad... God help all us single Dad's who suffer the pain and loneliness of being discarded by our spouses and even our children. My only answer is seeking God by establishing a relationship with Jesus for healing, direction, and loving acceptance of our situations. God help us because society needs father's dad's papa's......
@@allen4758 God bless you brother, God is great and able to move mountains in our lives as long as we stay connected to his love guidance and spirit... A daily reprieve on the insanity we dwell in based on that connection to our higher power. Blessings unto you and yours Allen.
Dr. Peterson I love that you are having the podcast. In doing so you are introducing us to other great thinkers and this has been very useful for me. I'm a psychology undergrad which makes your discussions all the more interesting. I'm Jamaican and I'm a male just in case you use the comments to better understand your audience. It's so amazing that people all over the world can see this, youtube is indeed a revolutionary piece of technology. I wonder what's the long-term impact of it especially for those who use it constructively/ for intellectual development instead of just watching pranks. I'm also high right now(on weed), but don't worry I'm keeping my brain and my room clean.
Thank you!! The father of my children abandoned them, leaving them troubled and vulnerable, dis-regulated and inclined to control or to be controlled. As a parent I am working on myself so that by example I can show them that it’s never too late to change and evolve.
@@robertstephens796 please seek a therapist. Every single comment you have made is a criticism towards women commentators. This despite both Peterson and Williams pleading that single mothers need the help of (good) men.
I learn so much from JP. As a little kid I told my parents exactly what these gentleman were saying. When mom and dad slandered each other in front of me after a nasty divorce they were slandering me. They never respected my pleas for them to stop. I'm 14 years into a good marriage to a great man and 4 children and it's good to hear how important he is to our kids in ways that are hard to explain (teasing, rough housing, etc).
Hearing him list the problems facing boys made me start to cry. I have a nephew whose father isn't in his life. I want to call him and tell him I love him.
As a father I feel a lot more important after listening to this.
I love that!
I feel we were always important but sometimes never realize how important.
@Pro Me The US maybe for you. good luck with that.
@@paulh1802 you were always important!
@Pro Me The US a lot of research disagrees with you. Fathers have a huge impact on both females and males. W/O a father in the home. Males are more likely to drop out of school, not be in their children's lives and end up in jail. For girls, fathers will be a role model for future husband's and how they allow men to treat them. Children are more likely to suffer from abuse from non- related men/ women in the home. Children are also more likely to feel they are unworthy of love if the father is absent.
I love how the guest has his book and JP’s book facing the camera
@@dsmogor hum?
Not his first rodeo. ;)
It's done so you can't possibly forget who your listening to, right?
Very considerate indeed
A sign of respect, I think. Really classy too.
"Marriage is for children, not for adults. They're the primary target of rank order importance."
Something my parents never understood.
This is really a massive problem in Western society. People actually thinking marriage is about them.
It is true, but it is complicated because children need parents who are reasonably happy together and individually. So just being a robot that puts the child first is not enough. The child will later have relationships that mirror the relationship between the mother and father. Making sure one self and ones partner is a good functional loving unit is part of putting the child first.
I partially agree. If a couple is no longer in good terms and they are not working to solve their issues, the toxicity is absorbed by their children who are like sponges. Children need a good example of a partnership, they dont need martyrs as parents. In my eyes there are too many people married with the wrong person who would do amazing the moment they weren’t married anymore. My parents chose to stay together despite their so many incompatibility issues and their 0 willingness to solve them through therapy and I can tell you, my sister and I have no children. We dont want to transfer our traumas onto the next generation.
Sexual activity involves a trinity, the man, the woman and the child, you have to respect all three or conflicts will arise. I'm not saying I know your parents, but I suspect they ascribe to a more sterile approach to what sex is due to a perverse education given by government school, which then created a conflict with reality.
Exactly!
@@mariasoulastrology8169 Yea, I get that perspective as well.
It really feels like a roll of the dice to be honest. Some people work out, and some people just don't want to try.
Its honestly the worse when a divorce happens and the child is still developing (as I was). I think I turned out okay because I got a ton of attention from my grandparents and especially my grandfather. But not everyone has that privilege.
I'm likely not even going to get married until I have a stable income- such that my spouse wouldn't even have to work a job if she didn't want to (she can if she wants optionally) so as to make things less complicated.
Warren displaying Jordan's book next to his own is such a subtle show of admiration, a very lovely gesture. Very telling of the type of person he is, caring and humble.
Discipline delays of gratification is. Success in the long run.
Please talk to Dr Farrell at least once a month. Every time you do, my sons’ lives get better. Thank you both!!!!
As a single father of 3 I am extremely grateful for this video
hold fast young man.
The work you're doing to be the best father you can will echo through time
@@RoddyPipersCorneas thank you. I'm so very glad your father took the brunt of life on the chin for his kids, the way every man should. All I can hope is that when my kids look back on their life they can say "dad did good"
Stay strong! Being a good father is the most important thing you can do in life. And make sure your kids have female role models as well
@@tteot1wph thank you. I'm looking for a good female role model. My sister has been stepping up in that regard, for the kids thankfully
19:22 - "Anger is vulnerability masked and the moment you see your partner as angry, look at the vulnerability that created that anger - the possibility they felt rejected, the possibility they felt misunderstood...that somethings bothering them over and over again but it been ignored and every time they say what's bothering them there's a response, a disconnect that cuts them off and interrupts them before they finish their full feeling"
As an asian definitely was an eye opener because I always believed parents' anger issues was a part of asian culture
That reminded me also of something that stuck in my mind from Jordan's "Beyond Order", the chapter about "not hiding unwanted things in the fog": He observed that anger, and afterwards tears, can be a sort of testing how much you are willing to put up with, how much you actually care about your partner. If you can listen and press beyond the anger, beyond the tears, you get to the bottom of things (which the person who is angry or starts to cry hasn't fully articulated yet) and can start sorting them out.
Very reason i broke off with my best friend 2 weeks ago.
If you try to deal with the vulnerability or fear that inspired the rage, you may unwittingly encourage the rage. If someone hits you and then you try to understand why and try to help that person feel less vulnerable, you will only encourage them to hit you again. You can help children this way because you are bigger and more powerful. You must not teach women or children to "understand" a man's aggressive behavior as something other than it is. You must teach them that expressing feelings that way is wrong. When you "understand" violence, you create a sense of entitlement to hurt people with words or fists or weapons. You cannot reward violence. Women have been taught to condone violence from men and to look at the fear or vulnerability and take responsibility for it since the beginning of time. Where I grew up and during those years, women were understanding and moral, and men indulged in very aggressive behaviors and were allowed to do so because they were men and they had responsibilities while their wives stayed home doing "nothing." They drank, hit their wives, beat their children, got into fights, got fired repeatedly, disappeared for weeks at a time, and we were to understand how hard it was for them and not to upset them.. This is how we allow violent behavior to control us. It is how we express our feelings that matter. Warren Farrell forgets that over and over. Fear of rejection is not a reason to hurt women, but for some reason he has always blamed women. Women are not obliged to manage the feelings of any man who approaches. Men are obliged to manage their feelings just as everyone else is. Aggression does not belong in the family. The family has to be a safe place.
@@nancynord260 I agree that you have a point there. When "to understand all" becomes "to excuse all" we're heading down a dark road. The context which my original comment referred to wasn't about physical violence but verbal anger masking disappointment in partners.
I heard once somebody say that "behind every anger/violence is a hurt child", and I think that might be true in some cases, yet I also believe that is predicated on the naive assumption that men is essentially good, which always makes me a bit sceptical when I hear something like that. We should definitely be more sophisticated.
happy that Mr.Peterson has the strong Male support he has, but to all the people who criticize him: HI, still a woman, still benefiting. found better confidence through him then all the crummy marry sues in media.
I was huge fan from first sight, and I have never understood why MSM say women don't like him. What's not to like? He's a perfect gentleman. He is really really smart. He likes to talk for hours about mythology and psychology and why everything is, but he is still an excellent listener. He makes men interested in those very interesting subjects so that we can talk with them about it (yes finally!). He even makes men want to clean up after themselves, treat their partners as partners, and talk about their dreams, and how they can become better versions of themselves (he is turning them into romantic movie heroes for our benefit). He is leading by example and is the perfect son who loves and speaks highly of his mother. He is the perfect husband, who loves and is faithful to his wife and he speaks very highly of her with much love and admiration. He is the perfect father and loves his daughter and is full of admiration for her accomplishments (and he loves his son and father and speaks highly of them too). He's got an excellent sense of humour. He's very entertaining. He is handsome. He is not a wimp. WHY would any woman not like that?
@@mariasoulastrology8169 Great question. I believe the answer in part is that we're moving through an era in which women are under enormous pressure to shun and condemn male mentors and potential male partners who refuse to define themselves according to identity politics. It's a bloody shame.
By freeing me from those constraints outright, Dr Peterson effectively teaches me to think critically and courageously as a woman. And the more nuanced perspective that freedom gives me allows me to move forward *together with* the males in my life and at large.
Also, as someone with a male twin whom I loved dearly and always sympathized with, I've found Peterson gives voice to the catch-22s of my brother's life. That helps me heal some of the effects of my brother's trauma that I shared by virtue of being his twin.
@@sheilac5319 beautifully said! I feel his lectures pretty much saved my life (or my mind and emotions) and I think for many of the same reasons that (some) men like him. He articulated where I had been lazy or sheepish in my reasoning and life is so much better on the other side of that.
Almost perfectly stated. Except that he's DR peterson ;)
@@cassandraotroy6325 sure he is, but DR does not describe all he is, and most DR's are nothing like what he is. It is like saying a martial arts expert can walk :)
This discussion was illuminating as a child of divorce. Even as a girl/woman/female this resonated with me and the difficulties I experienced and still experience as a child of divorced parents. Especially ones that could barely communicate with one another after the split. Thanks to JP for having difficult conversations.
Guy here with divorced parents and there was so much to unpack here.
Maybe people who feel a great passion for each other should marry...... but some get married for the wrong reason, they feel only friendship ...like roommates. If there was never love why do they marry just to manipulate the other person?
As someone whose parents are still together I can safely say these are not issues exclusive to officially broken families. You can have the exact same dysfunctions in an intact household where psychopathology runs rampant.
@@Illlium and that's certainly not something I'm denying- if 2 lunatics were to have a kid it may even be worse than 1 lunatic but we also know the likelihood of you having 100% lunatic parents is lower if you have 2 and the outcomes for 2 parent households are better in almost every measurable way across society.
@@haghendowdy4750 The point I'm trying to make here is: just because parents are still married doesn't mean the family isn't broken. Sometimes it's actually worse when you have two people enabling and exacerbating each other's psychopathology. And I do mean both worse for the kids and for parents, although in my case it was only the kids part. Sort of like what you would experience in a dysfunctional post-divorce family where children are pawns in a game to get at each other, except the kids are always there to soak up all the garbage parents have to unload from dealing with each other.
As a single mum I was very well aware that not having a father in the home harmed my sons. The most important issue for me was to mitigate the harm as much as possible, and I would have appreciated more public information and debate on this topic. Of course it hurts when you are reminded that your divorce (lacking knowledge about choosing wisely) hurts your children, and getting reminded can trigger very sad and bad emotions and reactions, but putting the head in the sand, does not help my or others sons and daughters!!
Well what did you do for then see their father? Much?
This was a hard discussion to listen to as a single mom. My son's father has not reached a level of maturity or depth of love to fully embrace his responsibility. I am left to try to cover over his selfishness and horrible choices so that my son does not internalize all that. Then also, working endlessly to ensure our son has positive, strong men in his life. I pray the men in our culture will come to understand their vital role as monumental, sexy, & heroic!
@@heathersohappy2833 "My son's father has not reached a level of maturity or depth of love to fully embrace his responsibility" - so why in the hell do you have kids with such a man. There was a single mom in the comments complaining about the same stuff and she had 3 kids with the guy. At no point did she ever consider that maybe there was something wrong with her. So I ask you...why did you choose such a man to father your kids? What were you thinking? It is so common for women to simply blame men. Did you actually support him and help him grow or you sort of just expected him to do what you want him to do?
This couldn't have come at a better time. My son just started 1st grade. Now I have some idea of what he's up against and how to deal with it. TY for your work JBP!
You watched the entire thing in twenty minutes?
@@ziyaaddhorat I'm listening to it, he dives right in the deep end from the beginning.
@@johnekopy Anything of substance or is it the usual babble?
@@ziyaaddhorat he does the usual long introduction, but then they get right into a lot of statistics and reasons boys are struggling.
I agree completely man. How could that intro not grab you as a father of young men.
Incredible. I love my husband and I love our sons. My husband and I have talked about many of these topics, and it's so good to hear some research and a lot of nuance behind our observations.
@@josephblowseph6123 Thank you for sharing about the book!
Watch the red pill documentary by cassie jaye warren was a part of it. It will teach you a lot about what rights your sons dont have.
There's so much specific data .. it's wonderful
@@wyleecoyotee4252
Warren was a famous Feminist.
He marched with Gloria Steinem in 70th!!
He was the only man on the board of directors at NOW (National Organization of Women)!!!
"Farrell initially came to prominence in the 1970s as a supporter of second wave feminism; he served on the New York City Board of the National Organization for Women (NOW). Farrell advocates for "a gender liberation movement", with "both sexes walking a mile in each other’s moccasins".[1]"
@@josephblowseph6123 A simplification, from my point of view, if I may. I have 2 adult sons, 1 grandson. I have been paying attention to the destruction of men for decades, commercials, sitcoms, movies, all disparaging even demonizing men of all ages, glorifying divorce, demonizing marriage, having children/parenthood, even if I were a mother of girls I would be paying attention to this destruction of men and boys, because as a mother, I would be hoping and praying for a man worthy of friendship and marriage for my daughters. The entire world needs men to make society workout for the best for everyone. 3rd wave feminism is the death of every civilization. There was a place for feminism when it started, it is useless even evil now. I hope women, young, single, married, gay, trans, whatever will begin to pay attention to the boy crisis and begin to love and care for our boys as if they are not "disposable". Women if you do not know about this crisis, you will fold under the pressure of the schools, and friends, propaganda from the media, and damage/fail the boys and men in your life for generations to come. Stop teaching your girls they can do anything a man can do. It's a lie!
19:20 "Anger is vulnerability masked and the moment you see your partner as angry, look at the vulnerability that created that anger."
I heard this quote repeated in my head for the rest of the video. I am going to try to apply this to my own thinking about how I am perceived at home.
I've consumed hours upon hours of your lectures and discussions and I think this one might be my favorite. So poignant and relevant. These issues are the wedge that is creating the schism in the west. Love how energetic and dense the talk was yet still comprehensible. You and Warren work really well together, birds of a feather.
This interview is really interesting and engaging. I would hope Jordan looks into letting his guests finish their thoughts in future interviews. I am here because of his brilliance but also want to hear the guests. ✌🏿
I am 100% with you. Jordan of course understands the thoughts of his guest. So he just jumps in due to that. Though we can follow, I would like for them to say what’s on their mind fully.
Yeah totally!
True that it would be nice to hear the guest finish his channel of thought before being cut off. Much respect to Jordan for the work he is doing, this isn't a criticism just a healthy observation.
I felt the same way, there was quite a bit of discontinuity while the guest was trying to complete his thoughts, and Jordan interjects prematurely and goes into lecture mode; and as a listener the discontinuity makes it harder to piece the points together. I adore Jordan but I think perhaps in this one Jordan just felt very passionately about family, children, marriages, gender variance, men's issues, and couldn't hold his thoughts back.
@@AaronMetallion it also doesn't help when he has read the guests book and probably knows more about what he is going to say than we do. But yeah JP shut the hell up sometimes and let the guest fully articulate his thoughts. ❤
Thank you for brining these issues to light! I teach martial arts and it's very obvious young boys are craving physical challenges, male role models, and discipline.
Martial arts trainers are a godsend for parents. Sometimes they are sent to a gym exactly the reasons you outlined.
Very grateful my son in law is taking the eldest granddaughter to judo. I'm hoping all 3 will be able to do it (3 girls).
I also see that as a problem though. Tomorrows leaders won’t be physical leaders. We need engineers and coders and deep thinkers. I have / had the immense desire to do physical activities. So I tried to be a professional skateboarder for a decade. In the end I decided to give it up. As fun as it was, the world doesn’t benefit much from me skateboarding. Or karate chopping. Or hitting the gym. Or firing a gun.
The things that made men great in the past are now becoming antiquated.
Of course I still stay physically active on the side. But competition in my field of work - as the results of women now entering the field - is so fierce.
I’m lucky that I’m creative and highly educated. I’m doing really well in my field because my expertise is useful. I can’t say the same for many men who’s skill set is becoming obsolete. Soon truck driving will automated, as will most manual labour.
On the upside, male nerds around the world are rejoicing. They won. Many of the jocks and male bullies from school that thought they would breeze through life have fallen behind and the geeks are excelling and changing the world.
Yes some men will make a great career as athletes or but it’s winner takes all in that field. Only a few can really succeed.
If I have a son that wants to be a professional athlete I won’t say not to try but I will make sure he goes to college and has a really solid plan B. Ideally I’d push college as plan A and athlete as plan B.
Young boys need to learn to sit still and read books or these future men are going to be in trouble.
I saw a video the other day of a robot Amazon is developing that will replace human workers almost entirely. It’s terrifying. Imagine 50% or more of men are suddenly out of work. That’s going to be bad news for everyone.
@@scottcantdance804 Yup! Modern 20 year old males have sperm counts equivalent to 80 year old men!
@@jakubhladik5898 I believe in being well-rounded.... We all need physical exercise as well as mental.
19:20
"Anger is vulnerability's mask"
Damn. Ive never looked at it that way.
Agreed, that’s something I’m gonna think about a lot now that I heard it.
Was looking for this comment before I pointed it out. Heavy statement.
This is easy to spot from animals or if u have a small dog that gets scared easy, they bark and act aggressive when in fact scared
The ferocity in his eyebrows kept me thoroughly and wholeheartedly engaged.
U were terrified 😨
🤣🤣 right?
Ha ha I also noted the intense eyebrows commanding my attention.
Thanks for promoting positive masculinity. Thanks for the dad vibes. Thanks for helping a guy focus on what his heart hopes for.
I would like for us to recognize the amazing blessing it is to have Jordan producing this deeply meaningful, technical content, and contrast that with a year ago when we were all concerned for his health and recovery. So grateful! Thank you Jordan Peterson!
Listening to Warren Farrel breaks my heart... Remembering all the things that went wrong in my upbringing. Thank you, Dr Warren Farrell, for sharing your work and thoughts this definitively will be of great help on my path to recover my father from the belly of my past. Thank you, Dr Jordan B Peterson, for having these great people on your podcast.
I couldn't handle teasing going into middle school. And boy did that make life a living hell. Once i learned to not take myself so seriously it helped me socially so immensely.
Listening to JBP I realised I was wrong in high school, not my peers - boy, that was a handful. :D
@Pro Me The US I attempted to stand up for myself plenty. But when it's one against 20 it only goes so far.
@Pro Me The US I doubt it. I was small for my age and probably would have just gotten the shit kicked out of me.
@Pro Me The US They didnt have many means to avoid me. Small 9 classroom 100 student school. Also the repercussions of physical violence could have been as bad if not worse than the bullying.
@@theninjaofmusic some people can't avoid being picked on.
If this stuff was being taught in schools instead of CRT, perhaps we could save the next generation and this nation.
Will never happen. The purposely want a low t genderless population!
We'll have to fix it ourselves.
Yes, indeed
Literally nothing is taught in schools. Factor any polynomials or read some Shakespeare lately? That people think putting their child in front of a chick who never did anything in her life other than school, is going to teach their kids, is just astounding to me.
@@-whackd We always taught our kids ahead of the school lessons so they would be familiar with the material before the teacher presented it. We used Schaum’s Study Guide math books starting summer before 6th grade to teach algebra, geometry, algebra 2, trigonometry. It made algebra1 freshman year a breeze. Always tried to give the kids an advantage. That was their ‘white privilege’, parents who cared.
I am a simple man(not really but "let's say, eh"),
I hear intro music - I laugh and remember 80s public television
I see Jordan - I feel hope
I see Warren - I feel valuable
I hear introductions - I tear up a bit and feel grateful
I hear 2 men talk for near 3 hours - and I believe fatherly love can maybe be part of western culture again in the future
I love these two men and would like to send them virtual hugs and thanks for what they are doing, you both made my life better. This conversation makes the world better
"(not really but "let's say, eh")" , ha you got me
As a female, I immensely appreciate the tools for human progress you share. Understanding differing strengths can be so potent when those differing strengths can come together and complement each other. So many are looking for a sane, inspiring role model and you have been that beacon of light for so many. Take care of yourself and family, we love you unconditionally.
Jordan looks fully on top of his game again!
Such great news
No way. He's better but still fighting through misery. The more I learn about his ailments, the more horrific.
Is it weird that I'm a 30 year old man I'm learning to reparent myself from watching this video? lol
nope, not at all :)
@@Thalasaur I have the same issue ? Which part of this lecture did they cover that ??
Nah, a lot of people weren't taught some of these lessons, myself included.
41! 😊
Not wierd at all. You are psychologically cleaning your room.
It's funny how much more I've learned on RUclips than I ever did in school. Excellent discussion 👏
I was about to blindly agree, but then thought about how my ed gave me the foundation to grasp the discussion, and to listen for 2.5 hours.
I would love to see a book some time soon from Jordan with a title 10 rules to how be a parent!! Please do that, it would be really helpful for a lot of people.
What a good idea
Oh my goodness yes please
@Paraskevas Politis, have a look at Dr. Gabor Mate's talks. Its been eyeopening for me as a father of 2.
@@birdie92k absolutely I will thaks for the advice.
Sorry, but I disagree. Jordan Peterson is, no doubt, a very intelligent man, but he is human. His 5th rule, when he mentions children, would suggest that he has unresolved issues, probably stemming from his own childhood. If he wrote such a book, i believe it would damage the readers relationship to their children and so damage the children themselves.
“You are perfectly suitable as a companion but in no way should your genetic material be able to propagate itself into the next generation.” I love how Jordan explains rejection, simple but chillingly accurate.
not really, this is rejection from a collective, this needs to be rephrased(although women are collectivists), but as a single woman something better would be "You are perfectly suitable as a companion but in no way should your genetic material to propagate in my gate, I hope you find someone for you as you are not what I am looking for"
@@RickC-rs7ny Basically the same sentiment, only a touch more hopeful
@@RickC-rs7ny he was probably talking about it at the individual level. Wouldn't be so jejune to assume that one man can be rejected by all women. It's such a good example only at the individual level. Perhaps even exacerbates the fear of rejection now he's put it like that hahaha
@@RickC-rs7ny No, that would be different message.
It's not that, the guy has to find someone else. But rather, be better than what he is now.
So, he has better chances at passing down his genes.
@@anand2138 10/10
This is the best of all your interviews you've ever done. I feel like this is a manifesto to understanding your role as a parent and part of a family, and really the hard work it takes to make it work.
@UCDWHy-X5lo7xmzXZbuxG1cQ huh? That’s your take away from this 2 and a half hour interview? Good grief. 🤦🏻♂️
@Pro Me The US define "man" ?
Peterson yes, always great, Farrell's flat and nervous talking, not so much.
Only wish that husband would have stepped up his support in parenting instead of going after other women and thus abandoning our family. Now, he repeatedly makes promises to his son, but breaks them. Unfortunately, not a good role model.
@@donnawoodford6641 Same here Donna. The father of my children did everything he could to destroy me and the children were very negatively affected. We did the 50/50 (or as close to that as possible), but in my case, and I suspect in other cases where one parent is a narcissist, 50/50 is not good for the children.
Now this is an amazing podcast. I've had to watch it in segments with a notebook on hand....
Put your notes here
That's how knowledge is gained.
Same here.
Leaving a comment in case you post your notes
Good stuff.👍
It's been a while since I've listened to the JBP podcast. Dr. Peterson is sounding much healthier than he did at the beginning of Season 4. I'm happy to see the 2+ hour long form format has returned.
I and my husband are now parents of a 6 months old boy. I am watching this for the third time and soaking up all the stuff. Thank you, dr. Peterson and dr. Farell. We believe we can produce a healthy boy with some guidance and oh what specific guidance you provide. Fathers are the best
This should be teach to all generations!!!❤️❤️❤️ my goodness!! With all the crap news and documentary no one dare to look into family dynamics and look to the source of all difficulties today. All boils down to the unit of the family, parents!!l
Warren Farrell is incredible, one of the best minds regarding male-female dynamics (he deserves more fame). I always learn something new from him. At 1:57:00 he makes amazing insights- society has an image built up on how to be an attractive man, but then once achieved, you’re not really human at that point.
Thanks for poiting this out. Wow! This might be related with the "self-less" acts from shonen heros. And, oddly enough, this are japanese shows, like Naruto or BNHA. The specific example of Izuku and his determination to risk his life in order to save those in danger. The hero's call.
What Dr. Warren just find out is the negative side of that trait. The extreme where we just "die" reaching the top.
PS: Fun fact, in BNHA (Boku no Hero Academia) Izuku (the hero) is going throug this phase in the manga. He's been fighting crime all day long, reaching exhastion. He's been stop by their friends now. But the key to stop that behaivor is to be more selfish. Just like Bakugo (the deuteragonist, the second protagonist who just want to figth and win)
@@InkaHacker Interesting explanation, that makes sense.
Also, even though this pertains to guys, I think women have faced a similar issue in the past in that society values skinny girls (therefore they starve themselves). Though I think society is becoming more accepting of non-skinny girls (but still dismissive of unsuccessful men)
But, in my opinion you can still be attractive and not fall in society's conventionally attractive ideal. While I'm not into obese girls, I would prefer a girl with some curves rather than completely skinny.
@@cococrispys
Society values women that appear healthy.
Today in the West, this means slim women.
Elsewhere and throughout history, this would have meant curvy women.
@@benwhiley9680 there is curvy and there is fat, the bodyshaming bullshit is mostly pointed towards 75pounds overweight women
You're contradicting yourself in the PS. Being a hero is good. Slaving for the boss is bad and not heroic. Don't mix the two. "Fighting crime all day" is honorable. If you are a victim of the crime, would you want a selfish crime-fighter?! I think not.
This is as important as the Bible so far as I can formulate a value structure that is useful. I wish I could memorize every word and properly apply it in my life, with my family and in my community. I am so grateful for this content that Dr. Jordan Peterson is producing.
Where I live there are several single mums who laugh and joke about stopping the fathers of their children from seeing them. They take delight in the hurt they cause without realising the damage that's being done to their kids.. I agree wholeheartedly with your comment, we need more people to listen to this podcast..
34:04 Dads deal more with reality than with feelings. Dads deal in consequences.
Problems start when they dish out consequences for moms' feelings.
35-year old fish: "Where have all the good bicycles gone?"
"You don't exhaust me, you energize me"
Ditto.
My teenage boys have lost two teenage friends that were male to suicide in the last 3 years. Heart breaking.
That's tough. I've been there. I think at first I questioned if I'd done enough to be a good friend, but in time, I had to accept that sometimes it's complicated and ultimately the decision of the other person (i.e., not every person close to the deceased needs to feel guilty about everything). Good luck.
Omg. Your comment stopped me in my tracks. Heart breaking.
My brother committed suicide at 18, this was over 30 years ago and it still hurts every day. The loss to society that male suicide causes is staggering as is the personal loss it causes.. Stay strong..
I had many friends commit suicide in high school. Tragic
Wow Kari, deep. Thanks for sharing how your heart’s broken. Boy commits suicide, Kari most effected.
Possibly one of the greatest conversations i have ever heard.
Thank you Kyle. Please elaborate, so I know what is most helpful in the future.
@@warrenfarrell2755 You're not warren farrell
Very important topic. I had a sociology professor who went in retirement. In her last speach in 2018, she said that the thing she was most concerned about was the declining performances of men in the university (Netherlands). Think about that.
That's nice of her. My community college had a sociology department head who refused to use the word "human" ..
@@cdougans I understand
@Friedrich Nietzsche Utrecht, Trudie Knijn
THANK YOU, Dr Peterson and Dr Farrell! You are godsend, this exchange of knowledge, experiences, and insights is like rain to dry ground for many marriages and families in the broken world.
It is hard to believe any two and a half hour conversation could be fascinating throughout but this truly was. As a divorced father living 400 miles from his two sons for two decades, so much of this resonated and I am so proud we maintained a close and meaningful father/son relationship throughout in the face of all of the difficulties. It is tragic to hear how politicians know the problems but won't address them due to short term political expediency. As such, this situation can only get worse. Thank you for a wonderful podcast
Thank you so much for this interview Dr. Peterson.
I am in an extremely difficult point in my life where in the span of a couple of months I found who I thought was the best possible woman and said yes to her demands for us to have a children and push forward through everything very quickly.
Now less than a month ago she sends a message out of the blue over text saying that she’s leaving and never coming back and gave no reason for it. (thankfully she can’t go too far because she has a 10-year-old with a very minimal malevolent man that keeps her from moving out of the area or away from me)
Things were stressful and difficult of course because she’s pregnant and has a lot of those hormones going on, and also we are in our 30s and she definitely has a lot of issues that are akin to PTSD and possibly bipolar issues. I knew this going in and I am absolutely up for the challenge but she has a tendency to run away from her problems and I believe this is why it blew up in our face and I am finding it difficult not to be resentful of her giving up.
But this interview maps out what I can best do myself to be the best possible father and that’s what I need to hear right now.
Thank you
Good luck, accept responsibility and look after yourself.
Good luck!
The tldr for young men is 'don't put your dick in crazy'.
I agree with Richard and dont make that mistake again.
Well, like it or not, it's just not a good idea to get involved with a woman with a kid or kids. Yeah, sometimes it works out and the couple even has their own kids but ...
There were plenty of women out there.
2 of my favourite thinkers speaking together for 2h40 let's go
Dr Peterson, it would be impossible to express how much your work has done for me. I'll just say thank you.
This is truly fascinating. I've believed for a long time that fathers get a raw deal and they're undervalued. It takes two to make a baby, it should be obvious that both parents are needed.
If only I could of listened to this when I was 17 to 18..
I thank all the men in my family for teaching me how to respond to teasing. Personally, I prefer working with men as opposed to women specifically because they can take a joke. The discussion explains so much about the behaviour I have observed in younger people.
Practically every woman I have met in my life, says that they would rather work with men, or at least a work somewhere where the majority of co-workers are men. I wonder why?
I have been around more men in my life than women. I worked with my husband in construction & yes I have laid bricks, hauled bricks & made concrete. I would not advise it for women.
Men, including my brother, father & son have taught me many things that I feel all women should have knowledge of.
My husband died when I was 29. My sons were 9 & 10. I continued building for awhile because we had a great group of subs. The men that I was around working taught me many things. They were always helpful, respectful, trustworthy, thoughtful with no ill intentions. I will always appreciate their loyalty.
A lot of women can be tricky & most with ill intentions. I have several great girl friends of many years who I trust & love dearly that helped me unconditionally. Loyalty & truthfulness are hard to find these days.
Although I am older now, I have always loved feminine things, but more comfortable in jeans, t-shirt, boots & a work belt. I also love great tools & gadgets.
We all need to change roles at times to understand & teach the opposite sex the how & why of our duties at work & home. I started teaching my sons how to sort laundry, cook & clean at an early age.
We can all be left in the blink of an eye. It’s far from easy, but having knowledge of important things can make it easier. Women tend to not want this knowledge & I don’t know why.
“Anger is vulnerability, masked”
If only it was that simple
This was really, really good.
Great point at 35:05. My daughter wanted a dog. Her mom said she will help out with food but Daddy will be in charge of vet bills (even though mommy made more money than dad does). So when my daughter approached me on the topic, I told her it involves a lot of responsibility and we're not getting one until we have saved at least $3000 in the bank for a startup dog fund , and not until she can consistently demonstrate responsibility by actually fulfilling her duties (cleaning up after herself, tidying up her room, helping around the house when asked and offering to help, and taking care of her smaller pets. Her desire somewhat fizzled after a week when it started to feel it was too much work.
Dr Peterson. I listened to all of your podcasts, some of them more times than the others. Thank you for your hardwork. I may not be a proud husband but i am a very proud father and daddy. I hope one day ill be able to fix my relationship with my wife. I dont even know at which point it went the wrong way. Ill keep working on myself. Have a great day and God bless you, sir.
Wow I just like how Warren maintains eye contact. It tells pretty much about how serious is the situation and things he is considering during his intervention.
Tbh i find it strange when in an online format (zoom, skype, etc). Id rather have the person looking at my face, rather than at the camera as i find that evokes more personal interactions (assuming of course that an inperson interview is impossible).
@@antibull4869 yes I totally agree with you. Looking at the screen would seem more natural. But still his eye contact is something you don't always see.
@@antibull4869 you can set up a teleprompter so you are seeing the persons face, but your eyeline is perfectly set to be in the camera lens. @saradietchy has a good video on how to do it, it helped us when we built the set for the What Kind of Internet Do You Want? series for @openindexproto and tbh, as the person in front of the camera looking into a teleprompter and the camera lens at the same time feels really natural, almost like you are in the same room with the person you are interviewing :)
This dialectic was magnificent! I wanted to pause to do some chores, and waited for a natural place to stop, But the conversation just kept developing!
I grew up without a father and did cub scouts and Webelos and it helped tremendously
My "boy scouts" group consisted of 6-7 girls and a guy that came out as gay a couple years later xD. Too much singing I didn't participate in and too little scouting indeed.
Of course, as a teenager, I blamed myself and my shyness for feeling out of place. But it's all good, you live and eventually learn.
@@LordSantiagor ya the scouts have change i started in 92 and can say that the day they allowed girls in was it’s downfall, i’m really sorry you had that experience it breaks my heart. Mr. P seems pretty good at fixing things though, certainly saved my life
@@travisvollmer2907 I'm from Spain, so my experience is unrelated to the US organization anyway.
This particular Scouts group was pretty wild and I have good memories overall.
Dear Mr. Jordan Peterson, how can you not fall into tears? Tks.
This is the single best and relevant talk I've heard as a men's coach AND father of 2 sons thus far. Thank you so much guys!
The suicide rate in our boys is heartbreaking. I began having suicidal thoughts in elementary school. Thank you for speaking on this issue.
A day don´t go by where i don´t think about offing myself at least once, and my life is not even that bad. Mostly its just due to boredom/loneliness or simply having to do the horrible shit we all have to do in life, like paying bills or attending long meetings. But yeah, you are not alone, school is also where i started getting these thoughts on a regular basis.
Where do those thoughts come from? I’m always picturing a demon sitting on my shoulder, whispering evil thoughts into my mind. Maybe that’s what St. Paul meant when he wrote, “Hold every thought captive.” and “Pray without ceasing.”
That could be true, just bc a thought begins with "I" doesn't mean it comes from you. Life is a gift, please don't hurt yourself. One old friend did during covid bc he was in bad pain and it left his family devastated. Ask God to give your life meaning
How lucky are we to be able to hear this conversation. Mind Boggling how far mankind has come
glad to see the two of you together again, discussing important issues that will probably improve the lives of many. Keep it up!
Man I love your user name!!
Traditional media will never be able to compete with the experience o listening for two hours to this giants talking from their vital experience and wisdom.
Thank you gentlemen! For helping me better articulate what I've known my whole life. I was raised by two parents properly. Through the viewing of the video, I couldn't help but to think how lucky I am to have the parents I've been blessed with! Mr Peterson, on behalf of all men.Good looking Ghee! What an asset you are to men the world over. Cheers! 🍻
Excellent point about the role of anger. Geez, imagine having a friend that smart to have these kind of conversations with
This was truly a great conversation, I learnt so much, Its like free therapy
Wow! How helpful this conversation is!!! At 79, I find I can be helpful to the kids I meet. I had parents that wanted to be helpful and fair, and most times they succeeded. My ignorance and needing to learn was the hindrance. They learned also. We had great conversations after I grew up, which is ongoing. Ask my kids…
BRILLIANT!
Thank you Dr. Farrell for this conversation, and for being patient with our beloved Dr. P and his propensity for impatient rejoinders.
It was wonderful conversation to have been a small part of. There are no words in any language suitable to express my gratitude to you, Dr Peterson, for this and all your work.
After watching jordan petersons lectures for 3 years now. I feel that i can comprehend the chain of thought which is going through in his mind and get my mind blown.
What do you mean?
Looking forward to Jordon Peterson interviewing Dr. Douglas Frank and his algorithm. Solzhenitsyn said it best, "Live not by Lies."
Just the thought of 'disposable men', indeed any 'disposable creature' affects me so profoundly I'm now weeping as if my heart is about to break. My ex husband behaved deplorably towards our son and me.I didn't take any money from him when we were divorced. Nor did I allow myself to say horrid, although true, things about his father. He spent weekends with his father, and to this day we have a cordial relationship. Even a letter of apology. As a result, my son is a decent, caring father. Believe me, in the long run, it's far,far easier to divorce in a civilised way. Despite all the financial and soul destroying things that happen along the way.
Currently caught in the crisis. Stay strong, friends. ❤
Oh man the peas. This is exactly what happens with me, my husband and our son. In fact my husband taught me that when he draws the hard lines with our son, our son actually adjusts much better than I expect. So then I remind myself that my son CAN adjust when a hard line is necessary to enforce.
My life has forever been altered by your words, Thank you jordan peterson
Nice to see Dr. Farrell here!
Nice not to see Dr. Fauci here!
@@charmingperson5280 😂
@@charmingperson5280
Farrell is a famous Feminist.
At least he was.
* He marched with Gloria Steinem in 70th!!
He is the only man ever who was on board of directors at NOW (National Organization for Women).
This is one of the most insightful discussions I have ever seen.
This is such an amazing conversation! I'm glad it was over 2.5 hours
When I was about 19 I became really preoccupied by what a father does/is and also solidified my insistence that I did not want to be asingle mom for any reason (things happen, but I didn't want to have the attitude not caring about it). I think a lot about why it's important kids have their dads and as a woman how fo identify and appreciate that without being upset that it's different from my instincts. This talk was so helpful in articulating and explains some of that. I cannot thank you both enough
I am a 65 year old white American woman. I’ve raised 2 sons and two daughter in a divorce.I “discovered” you last week. I approve of your theories wholeheartedly.
I don't think men fear rejection these days. There's certain risks involved with asking or approaching women now if you are not good looking. You get labelled as creepy or weird. Also many men just don't see the point in chasing women anymore. It's just not worth it.
anything seems to serve as sexual assault these days, its a awful mine field the dating world. Comparing the climate I grew up in to today i would not trade for a second, and i feel bad for the youth of today, so awful everything these days.
There's also decreasing opportunity costs. Having a wife/gf is now less of a social marker. The enormous increase in the accessibility of porn also reduced the costs of single life a lot.
And how is that NOT rejection? It's rejection to the nth degree. It's not just "I would never mingle my genes with yours" any more, it's "I hereby publicly mark you as unfit for reproduction, and this brand you shall wear for all other women to see".
The very reason it's not worth it is because of the increased risk of total rejection.
You're also forgetting in the 21st century you jack off to the most attractive women your imagination can conjure.
If you can quell the motives of testosterone of course the incentive decreases. Literally curbing your own biology.
@@chc9011 Its pretty much the same thing, but being insulted/labeled would probably hurt more than just being rejecting.
This is one of the best discussions I have ever seen.
Matthew 13:12 "He that has much, much more will be given; he that has little, even what he has will be taken from him"
Warren Farrell put Jordan's book on background. What a wholesome guy
I was born in 1981 to two parents in Baltimore City. I have seen everything being discussed in this conversation firsthand. I don't think ppl outside of inner cities realize how quickly society can deteriorate. My neighborhood was amazing in 1988 and was a warzone by 1998. Fathers matter. Good men are the only ones that can keep the bad men away.
This is some good stuff. Eye opening. Also wanted to say I love how Dr Peterson always references Peter Pan and Pinocchio. I would expect him to have a Peter Pan painting somewhere in his home. Dr Peterson you are awesome. Never change.
I've never seen someone interrupted more times in my entire life lol I love Jordan but come on man he didn't let him finish talking one single time 😂
I definitely plan to buy this man's books. So impressed with him (and with Peterson, too, obviously).
* this straight, of Christian background, white man's 🤗📕
The Boy Crisis is superb and heartbreaking in equal measure
Prepared all my life to learn and pass on culture/heritage, knowledge, wisdom, and understanding.
Turns out there's a lack of willing recipients or the time to find it.
Did anyone else notice jordans expression and fast lift of the eye brows after he says ‘New York Times’ during his introduction of the guest at the start of the video? 🤣 oh boy. Had to laugh. Just love this guy and his openness.
Mark...if you're intellectually honest and don't care for agenda-driven lies, then you too would have an issue with NYTimes.
@@markdouglas1601 nahh that's for sure a look of contempt, watch it again. You may disagree which is okay, but to me it was fairly blatant lol. Brief expression but one of negative emotion.
@@markdouglas1601 NYT wrote a disgusting hit piece against Jordan and Mikaela.
Here's what I believe to be true, Jordan Peterson is reading the résumé that the guest has provided and approved. Jordan Peterson has stated that he allows his guests on his podcast freedom to edit in or out certain things that they might not be happy with. But, that he likes the free flow of conversation to occur with as much naturalness as possible.
You may be correct, because there was definitely a body language movement of 'raising the eyebrows' right after saying "The New York Times," along with a slight pause. What's more interesting to me, is in light of the slanderous article in the New York Times recently mischaracterizing Peterson, that he didn't make any explicit sarcastic comments, which we know he is inclined to do.
So if anything, it shows his ability to have restraint and to focus on the guest and introducing the guest in a way that facilitates getting to the material versus some other agenda.
@@stevebutler812 Great reply! I feel that too.
As an educator, I really appreciate this interview. No matter what educators do, we cannot replace strong, joint parenting. Boys get their self-confidence from male role models. How can we expect them to excel when there is no motivation? At the same time, though, it is better to not have a father if the father is abusive, addicted to a substance, or manipulative. These really destroy our young boys.
Unfortunately for me and my brother my dad has some of those qualities to a certain degree (even though he wasn’t addicted to drugs he was addicted to cigarettes) and I say unfortunately because I could see a lot of those qualities in myself and my brother, but the difference between us and him is that neither one of us are addicted to anything and although our tempers are pretty bad it has never reached to the point of abusing others like it did with my dad. Interestingly enough The difference between your brother inside he doesn’t seem to notice that he has those qualities, I am the other hand even though I do notice those qualities and I do try to work on them they always seem to come out. I bet of a sweet note me being a woman i’m always concerned that the whole woman marrying men who are like their fathers May end up being true in my case.
Anyways sorry for unloading all of this on you.
Manipulation comes mostly from females, especially emotional manipulation. Abuse is about 50/50, women just can't hit as hard.
@@Illlium not true.
Most psychopaths are males, most dark triads are males. Looks at the brain scan results of the Game Theory, where most females have dopamine spikes when both players cooperate while most males have dopamine spikes when they cheat and get away with it. Also, females tend to be more agreeable which means they are more likely to be manipulated.
Men love to project their own flaws into women.
Ah yes boys falling behind in school and committing suicide at an alarming rate, what a patriarchy we live in.
would you rather be stuck in a dead end warehouse job or be dead and never have to be a failure again.... good thing family court decided i am worthless
Right?
Indeed we do. Things need to change for the sake of us all.
Thank you for this much needed conversation! I am a single mother of four sons and I can only agree with your thoughts. Boys need their fathers , no matter what has happened before. Moms and dads are responsible to have a forgiving heart to each other, especially after divorce. I know what I am talking about and I am glad we took the chance. If we as women don’t honor the men and their special purpose, we will not get our freedom from any form of oppression or misuse, we are longing for.
Though One thing as a Christian, I do not agree: marriage is not only for the children, marriage is a divine covenant with God and therefore even holds much more accountability to it. Genesis 1 and 2 is beautifully describing it , even better in the original Hebrew.
I am almost two years divorced, this episode makes me sad and worried. I will pray to be a better Dad... God help all us single Dad's who suffer the pain and loneliness of being discarded by our spouses and even our children.
My only answer is seeking God by establishing a relationship with Jesus for healing, direction, and loving acceptance of our situations.
God help us because society needs father's dad's papa's......
@@allen4758 God bless you brother, God is great and able to move mountains in our lives as long as we stay connected to his love guidance and spirit... A daily reprieve on the insanity we dwell in based on that connection to our higher power. Blessings unto you and yours Allen.
Dr. Peterson I love that you are having the podcast. In doing so you are introducing us to other great thinkers and this has been very useful for me. I'm a psychology undergrad which makes your discussions all the more interesting. I'm Jamaican and I'm a male just in case you use the comments to better understand your audience. It's so amazing that people all over the world can see this, youtube is indeed a revolutionary piece of technology. I wonder what's the long-term impact of it especially for those who use it constructively/ for intellectual development instead of just watching pranks. I'm also high right now(on weed), but don't worry I'm keeping my brain and my room clean.
Fighting the good fight, the men and boys who are left behind
Thank you!! The father of my children abandoned them, leaving them troubled and vulnerable, dis-regulated and inclined to control or to be controlled. As a parent I am working on myself so that by example I can show them that it’s never too late to change and evolve.
Abandoned or pressured out?
@@robertstephens796 please seek a therapist. Every single comment you have made is a criticism towards women commentators. This despite both Peterson and Williams pleading that single mothers need the help of (good) men.
One of the most genuine and fearless exploration of such a vital topic. Discussions like these are the way forward.
I learn so much from JP. As a little kid I told my parents exactly what these gentleman were saying. When mom and dad slandered each other in front of me after a nasty divorce they were slandering me. They never respected my pleas for them to stop.
I'm 14 years into a good marriage to a great man and 4 children and it's good to hear how important he is to our kids in ways that are hard to explain (teasing, rough housing, etc).
Hearing him list the problems facing boys made me start to cry. I have a nephew whose father isn't in his life. I want to call him and tell him I love him.
You really should call him. There is so much good a person like you could provide.