Cinematic Excrement: Episode 93 - Planet of the Apes (2001)
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- Опубликовано: 20 сен 2024
- It's a sh*thouse! A sh*thouse!
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Tim Burton is not supposed to make bad twist endings! That's M. Night Shyamalan's job!
Amazing that Roth and Heston could be professional at the workplace and not argue about politics. We can all learn from their example.
And the ape makeup in this movie still looks amazing.
The fact that one of the executives at Fox had no idea that Roddy McDowell was the co-star one of Fox's classic films is news to me, and a real shocker! Jackson made the right call in bailing out before the shit hit the fan.
Given that he was in four out of the five original films AND the TV series, it's kind of a miracle they had no idea McDowall was involved.
Oscar Stainton no doubt he went over to warner brothers to work on Batman and Robin.
The key words here, my friends, are Hollywood Executives. If you think they could find a dime, you'd better shove it up there arse first. You honestly think they spend time being aware of anything outside their own ego/mark up?
Barbara Streisand's former hairstylist is a Producer. If u don't know what that means...I can't help ya.
To the execs, movies are just a product to be shat out and make money. They don't actually watch the movies nor do they understand them. They just look at graphs, charts and market data and make all their decisions on that.
Given the oddity of this movie, I like to imagine the horses were actually the dominant species on the planet until the apes arrived. The idea of a war between intelligent horses and apes is just so bonkers that I'd actually pay money to see that. 🤣
Like Gulliver’s Travels!
Then it just turns into that bit from Futurama
Fun fact: Tim Roth turned down the role of Snape in Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone to star in this movie.
That's a good thing as I am having a hard time imagining anyone other than Alan Rickman playing the role.
Nathaniel Levesque Also, Rickman was handpicked by J.K. Rowling for the role.
Robert Treacy
His loss, Rickman's gain.
Which is weird because Rickman was twice as old as Snape was in the original books.
Good. Only Alan Rickman can play Snape. May that man rest in peace.
I loved the original 1960's version of planet of the apes, I watched it several times as a kid. I went to see this in the cinema when it came out and I was so mad, I was fuming. People kept shushing me because I was bitching about it the entire time. THE HUMANS ARE NOT SUPPOSE TO TALK!! That was a huge part of the plot! If they can talk it ruins everything!
I like how you hold your facial expressions for a period of time. They are really funny and your face is extremely expressive.
Chris stuckmann copied it
@@johnsmith-wx5fb You`ll never catch me aliiiive STUCKmaaaan!
@@afrog2666 type chris stuckmann julia.
Funny because that's the only thing I fucking hate about this guy. So boring, he does it like a billion times every episode. Do it once per ep like fucking "whatchu talkin about, Willis?" so it's still fun.
This was actually one of Heston's last film roles before he retired.
Nathaniel Levesque
And died.
He did Omega Man , And Soylent Green instead of the "Apes" sequals ,,,
He did the second movie with the knowledge that his character would be killed off & if you see that movie it's his hand that pushes the lever that triggers the bomb
I'm convinced Tim Burton created that stupid ending out of pure spite and was being sarcastic when he said he made the ending that way for the benefit of the filmmaker to take his place.
"Doctor Zaius, Doctor Zaius..."
You're thinking about that particular Simpsons episode as well, huh?
I love the legitimate theater.
This play has everything!
I said that in my head when the vid started! 🤣
oh... oh ...oh....Dr Zaius
"Dull surprise!" Wonderful use of MST3K sir.
To slightly paraphrase Christopher Walken in Batman Returns, "Tim. Shame on you." Also, don't you love it how Glenn Shadix went from being terrorized by an ape in Dunston Checks In to being one in this movie?
12:44, man Micheal Clarke Duncan is intimidating period. Only time he wasn't intimidating was in The Green Mile. Otherwise dude can be in regular clothes and be intimidating.
Well he's initially as you don't immediately know what's up with him. But then it turns around over the course of finding out about the character.
He was downright creepy in Sin City.
Yes he was a massive man but I heard he was an absolute joy to be around and was kind and sweet to everyone.
@@policerthought5649 LEGEND.
Fun fact: there were two drafts of this film where
One had Arnie's main character going back in time to save humanity to find a cure who gets caught up in a conflict between prehistoric humans and gorilla like hominids
- the other being a weird one where it would take elements from the book and it would've had this flintstones vibe where Ape society in this draft has its own equivalent to our own pop culture, The Simians - The Simpsons, McCoconuts - McDonald's and etc as well Zira being a Jane Goodall type character
This shit is bananas
B-A-N-A-N-A-S?
You try to get around my track
So it's not just gonna happen like that
Cause I ain't no Hollaback Girl
b.a.n.a.n.a.s
*looks at intro*
Geez Sean, that's a little harsh don't you think?
The Island of Doctor Moreau with Marlon Brando and Val Kilmer would be perfect for you to review Sean
Loved the weirdness of it.
Loved the new warning
The makeup effects in the original film are still fantastic. You really believe you're watching humanoid apes.
Human + Ape + Love = Don't do it
Isn't that the origin of AIDs?
MST3K showed that damn well.
@@dragonmaster613 what?
@vynat draco uhhhhh no
Monkey agree with OP
You're really good at those long pauses. It's never too long for me to want to skip ahead.
'The Room' references are so hot. You're tearing me apahhht, CE!!!
Dude you seriously need more attention
Pierre Boulle's La Planete des Singes(1963). The Bridge on the River Kwai(1957) is also based on his book.
Found your channel a few days ago and I love this style and humor of your reviews.
as a kid I always thought she looked like Michael Jackson...
this is the earliest I've ever been. Happy 4th of July everyone
I remember this film was the one I looked forward to the most in 2001. That and Mummy Returns. Boy was I disappointed that year.
Was just watching a marathon of "Apes" reviews, so this is perfect timing. Thanks!
HOLY FUCKING SHIT!!!!
I'VE BEEN SEARCHING THIS CHANNEL FOR YEARS!!!!!!!!!
I used to watch this guy like 7 years ago :'v
Burton woke up to the ending of a classic Twilight Zone episode and thought to himself "nailed it".
😂😂😂👍👍
The original also had Rod Serling of 'The Twilight Zone' co-writing the script along with Oscar winner and previous blacklistee Michael Wilson (who had previously adapted Pierre Boulle's other novel 'The Bridge on the River Kwai'), hence the social commentary and twist.
Also, given what Burton went through on the movie, there's a reason why then Fox head honcho Tom Rothman was so hated back in the day.
4:38 ugh, just the thought of Micheal Bay directing a planet of the apes movie is just terrifying
Everything explodes, Tyrese is saying something obvious, and for some reason some half-naked model is strutting around for eye-candy.
@Max S. Some half-naked teenage chimp girl, more likely.
I want to see you review Bratz the Movie :/ It deserves a Cinematic Excrement!!
He briefly talked about Bratz in his review of I Know Who Killed Me.
I'm honestly surprised that no one has followed up the romance plot of this film with the "Mind if I kiss the monkey?" line from Aladdin.
Maybe it's just because I grew up with the old set, and I really loved Roddy McDowell and Kim Hunter as Cornelius and Zira, but the makeup in the original films looks better to me.
Dr. Zaius Dr. Zaius.... Dr. Zaius Dr. Zaius... oh oh oh Dr. Zaius.
"What's wrong with me?"
"I think you're crazy"
"I want a second opition."
"You're also lazy"
All I can say is praise the reboot films. They are a godsend.
Some great movies don't need to be re-made. Charlton Heston's Planet of the Apes is the perfect example.
You get a like for Helena Bonobo Carter.
Dude, in the original he's smoking a cigar while inside a spacecraft . . . WTF?
Perhaps the ending could be explained in this way: General Thade, knowing the truth about the Apes and the humans and having witnessed the tech first hand, wanted revenge so he found Whalberg's original ship, got it working again, and headed for the time portal. In the same way that the space station crashed centuries before Marky Mark did, Thade's trip through the portal results in him arriving on Earth centuries before Mark's return to his own time period. Thade then took steps to make the apes the dominate species of the planet while killing or subjugating the humans. Mark then returns to an altered version of his time period.
I feel that Estella Warren would have made a better protagonist. Yes, I know she nominated with a Razzie for Worst Actress, but I think she could've made a better lead.
In fact, here is how I would do it: Daena, who Warren plays is the protagonist
Limbo(Paul Giamatti) could be her sidekick and Thade could be the villain.
Still, this movie is Burton's first collaboration with Helena Bonham Carter and started a relationship with her and had her later on Big Fish as 2 characters.
I'll shower this movie in coconut cream pies.
I see this comment is edited, meqning you felt it was important not only that you should say this, but that you should express yourself as clearly and as accurately as possible, and I have to ask... why?
Love the new warning, and no thanks on that offer
The technology was there. LOTR The 2 Towers was released the following year, which features Gollum. And Jar-Jar Binks was in TPM two years prior in 1999.
Those characters were mostly skin and muscle. Animating hair or fur was still in its infancy.
Monsters Inc. was probably the first to pioneer that technology during that time and a full digital environment was maybe much easier than live action one.
I’m ashamed to admit this but I saw this movie in theaters and really liked it. I was 30yrs old and should’ve known better but the power of Marky Mark knew no boundaries…🐵🙈🙉🙊
I hate the trope of "Villian has the hots for token female character". It makes no sense storywise, it always plays out the same way, and it never works ever!
Did anyone else notice Estella Warren's main line - repeated several times - was saying "Are you hurt?" or "You're hurt" to Mark Wahlberg's character? We had a running joke that she couldn't remember anything longer ("Do you require medical assistance?" "Are you injured?") so they just gave her that.
We need to get a graphic novel adaptation of the planned but
cancelled Planet of the Apes remake: *"Return Of The Apes"* that was
written by Terry Hayes & Oliver Stone (the executive producer) and would have starred Arnold Schwarzenegger.
If we can get a graphic novel
based on *"Twilight Zone"* creator Rod Serling's original script for the first POTA film, why can't we get one based on the unmade *"Return Of The Apes"?*
It kind of bothers me when people get sarcastic about spoiler alerts for older movies. It doesn’t matter how old the movie, there will always be someone who’s seeing it for the first time. The proliferation of movie reaction channels is the prime example of this.
8:36 has to be the best freeze-frame for anything I've seen in a while.
I'm glad you changed the warning screen at the beginning! It always bothered me a bit but not enough to ever actually complain- but I think this one is much better than the "are you OFFENDED????" sort of tone that was being struck with the first intro. Anyways, love your work!
Adam Rifkin's idea (1988): An alternate sequel to the first film, set decades later, where the Apes have a Romanesque civilization and use humans as slave labor. Duke, a son of Taylor played by either Tom Cruise or Charlie Sheen would lead a human revolt.
Peter Jackson's idea (1989): Similar to the above, but with the Ape civilization being analogous to The Renaissance and The Hero being a half human, half ape hybrid that a da Vinci-like old chimp played by Roddy McDowall would hide from the Orangutan Inquisition.
Terry Hayes' script, based on an outline by Oliver Stone (1994): A gritty reboot with little to nothing in common with the films or the novel, where a scientist played by Arnold Schwarzenegger travels back in time to 1 Million B.C. to find the cure of a plague that is decimating mankind and finds himself in the middle of a war between primitive humans and far more advanced, gorilla-like hominids. It got as far as to get a $100 million budget confirmed and Phillip Noyce attached as director before being cancelled when Hayes refused to introduce more comedy.
Sam Hamm's script, in collaboration with Chris Columbus (1995): A closer movie to Pierre Boulle's novel, where Schwarzenegger would play an astronaut instead, and the apes lived indeed in a different planet and had a highly-advanced civilization. Almost all of it, however, would be either taken from once advanced ancient humans from the same planet that had wiped themselves out in a war in the distant past, or from TV transmisions from Earth that the orangutans had caught in secret before introducing all the advancements featured as if they were their own inventions, in order to justify their privileged status.
James Cameron's idea (1996): An Alternate History of the original saga, where the orangutans had been overthrown by the chimpanzees prior to Taylor's arrival and developed as a result a more advanced civilization. It would begin with original footage from the first film before introducing a second astronaut landing years later, and culminate with the new protagonist meeting Taylor (played by Charlton Heston, of course), now the old founder and leader of a tribe of intelligent humans.
I’m embarrassed to admit that I have never thought about the origins of the horses in this movie...I wonder what else I’m not seeing...
"Where did the horses come from? ...Are you suggesting an animal identical to the horses evolved on this planet? Because that's a hell of a coincidence." Dude, I'm not disagreeing with you, but the theory of evolution is all literally one big coincidence.
I like that you spoil the original movie in your initial description, then mark the twist as a spoiler.
Love your videos though. You have an excellent screen presence.
how many space movies is that dude in? he was in Armageddon and Apollo 13
There is a severe lack of Johnny Depp unaliving Helena Carter.
Thank you for the MST3K clip!
I never liked these movies growing up. I do like the prequels though.
Edit... Hanging with Dr. Z is a genius RUclips channel.
You damn dirty human. I was patiently waiting for that explanation to why the calendar knew it was in the future. Laughing my f u c k i n g a s s off ,.....,. You really did get me on that one,. Bro I love your channel man how are you not a f****** million subscribers seriously
I always figured that it WAS Earth all along, just like in the original. But where Charlton Heston travelled to a future Earth, Walberg and the other scientists travelled to the PAST.
This changed the Earth’s history. As the apes on the spaceship were trained to be intelligent, it was APES who became the dominant species.
So when Walberg travels back to his own time at the end of the movie, he discovers that apes have continued to be the dominant species, and it was him and his team who altered the time line.
His computer can read star configurations and know the year. The question is, in a world without time travel, why are the computers programmed to constantly be taking the date from star positions?
Your history and review reminds me of Phelous and you are a very funny reviewer with a snarky and Deadpool rocks attitude.
I love all your videos that end with "...suck it!"
Dragon Skunk so everything except his "No Holds Barred" review?
Bsword640 and his review of Kirk Cameron's Saving Christmas
What's this? A Cinematic Excrement video released BEFORE the hours of slumber? What sorcery IS This!?
I just revolted in horror of what a Michael bay planet of the apes movie would look like thank god that didn’t happen (shudders)
Isn't there a nice elevator shaft he can fall down?
"Apebraham" Lincoln was hilarious!
Half of me is kind of heartbroken that McDowall died before he could come back to the series, half of me is glad he escaped being in this garbage. :/
That remarkably working ship was built by Honda
Hey Sean - if you haven't done the Point Break remake, I'd love to see you tear that movie a new one... 😉
Sure, Fox made a right call not greenlighting a sequel to this...but one of them apparently suffered enough of a blow to the head to green light one to Fan4stic?!! X(
The idiot you can thank for greenlighting Fant4stic is Tom Rothman. Look up Midnights Edge's video Deadpool a history of fox mismanagement. You'll hate the jack off afterwards.
Thank you for monkey/ape pedantry
Congrats,you're my new hero,just found you,dont hate the player,hate the player late to the game.
I wonder if any youtube critic will ever review Freddy Got Fingered. Nostalgia Critic, Fanboy Flicks, Stuckman, the Flick Pick, and so on nobody has the balls to review it.
Venom NBK That film is perhaps the closest thing to unreviewable that we will ever see in film history. That's how bad it is.
Nostalgia Chick did it.
Balloon Sage only with help from Oancitizens.
Doesn't that make watching someone actually review it all the more enticing? THINK OF THE VIEW COUNT!
Plus It's probably the easiest movie to review since nobody on earth will defend it. You could have the review just be 20 minutes of a guy reacting to each horrible scene in different ways and that would be more than sufficient.
The Nostalgia Chick did.
Saw this one during my birthday weekend - just after JURASSIC PARK III and before catching PEARL HARBOR during its last run in theaters (real crappy cinematic trifecta, if you ask me).
I honestly think I can work out a sequel, or at least a reboot of a reboot. Then again that is what I wanna do with my life (write screen plays and direct) so of course my mind is always thinking: I could have written and directed it better.
Great job, as usual. I was a bit worried that you'll go overboard with history of the series, cough x-men origins cough, but it was actually interesting.
How long do we have to wait for next riffed excrement?
10:36 why I hate Karli morganthal in falcon and winter soldier because her one expression is this
So, the space scientists in this are the equivalent of the Soviet space program?
The Soviets were happy to send Laika (and other animals) into orbit without any chance of them returning.
Tim Burton: "Movies are like candy, they don't need to have a point"
Wait! That was Michael Clark Duncan as the gorilla officer? How did I never notice...
I still didn't get the ending, even after 16 years.
In the book, the ape society is an advanced, futuristic one. The director of the original movie wanted this premise but the budget didn’t allow it. I was hoping that a remake would take the opportunity to present the ape society as in the book.
I love your new warning disclaimer! XD
My favourite part of this movie is the chimp lands the ship perfectly, but Marky Mark crashes, twice
I totally disagree with the dismissal of Conquest of the Planet of the Apes as "not so good" and think it is the most ambitious of the entire original series. The weakest in my opinion is Beneath which has some promising ideas but the cast is somewhat bland,especially the lead human actor. The sole reason to watch the Tim Burton version is for the ape make-up. Yes, the effects of the original films look primitive by today's standards but it was pretty amazing back when they were released. It's the stories and characters which make those films classics, even the much disliked Battle. The Burton film is typical of his brand of filmmaking and values style over substance. It does take its ending from the novel but filmed in such a terrible and heavy handed manner that you cannot help but laugh at it.
Oh oh, you missed it -- using the obligatory insert shot from _Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom_ of the hyperaroused priest chanting "Kali-ma, KALI-MA!"
(I guess the concept of _dust_ is baffling to _the World of the "Future"_ )
Also, speaking of "future," who's with me in thinking that General Thade's memorial inscription should have its word "FOREVER" misspelled as "EOREVER," just as the present Lincoln Memorial inscription had/has its word "FUTURE" misspelled as "EUTURE"?
( _Hah!_ Worth the price of admission).
Am I the only one who thinks the plot of 'Rise of the Planet of the Apes' is similar to Mojo Jojo's evil plan in 'The PowerPuff Girls Movie'?
aldo curiel Nope. I've seen comparisons have been drawn by at least one other person.
Grady Childs block buster buster?
Bill Engelhuber yes
Yes. I guess PPG movie predicted that.
A Volkswagen Bug would still work.
Sean really has potential with his channel. He can make reactions about not just movies... videogames too.
Because he kinda looks geeky gamer D&D player, you know
You should really make videos about videogames
Hey Sean? They have both horses and horse-like creatures in Star Wars on several planets. So....there's a chance.
The apes themselves spread the word about him to other ape communities which made its way to the humans that heard the apes talking about it.
Fun fact: Tim Burton has a phobia of chimpanzees.
Nice new setup and review as always, Sean. I'm betting Starship Troopers 3 the next review.
Happy Fourth of July to All! :D
Cinematic excrement! LOL ............(i actually subscribed just because of the channel name)
Your next review involves an animal that has a tendency to explode? My first guess was Starship Troopers 3, now I'm betting that it's Jaws 3 or 4, since the shark is always blown up, or maybe it's Sharknado 4 (just an assumption, I still haven't seen it).
Wait, did I miss something? You talk about the horses, but, more importantly, where do the *humans* come from? If it's a completely different planet and the humans from the 1st ship were killed by the apes, then how are there other humans a couple of millenia later?
8:13 An ape sitting on the iron throne??