#1 in our Top Ten List of Signs You are in a Toxic Relationship
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- Опубликовано: 18 окт 2024
- www.drdenisedar... The number ONE signs that you are in a toxic relationship is when the other person routinely defines your intentions, character, thoughts, feelings, and perceptions. When you try to express what you actually think or feel, or what your intentions are his response is to DEFINE YOU YET AGAIN!
“You always have to have the last word”
“You are trying to start an argument”
“You NEVER listen”
The narcissistic abuser is generally quite insistent that they are right and you are wrong, even when there is no way this person can know what is going on inside you. They take every opportunity to increase your dependency on them by "reminding" you that you need them to take care of you and keep you straight as to what is going on inside you. Emotional abuse can make it hard to stay connected to your wise inner voice simply because the abusive partner is drowning out that voice and the wisdom that comes with it. Learning to trust yourself again is an important part of recovery from narcissistic emotional abuse. Download the complete Top Ten List at my website www.drdenisedar...
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Please watch and tune in every Friday for the next installment of the Ask Dr. Denise Series: "When Will I Learn to Trust Again Narcissistic Abuse?"
• When Will I Learn to T...
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I get told I'm a "liar" because he thinks I tell him things, then the next day I "change my mind." Took me so long to realize he just never listened.
I am a separate, whole, wonderful person. Thank you 🌸💮🌸🏵️
Well.... it’s confirmed.... I’m in a toxic relationship! All signs fit in their own unique way!
He was forever saying "I know what your thinking I've been with you long enough I know Arline. Or he would say your lying I know when your lying I know you better than you do
That sounds sadly familiar; I can't tell you how many people tell me this almost verbatim. I've often said that it seems like there might be an abuser's manual because what they say is so eerily similar from one to the next.
It was good to go thru all of these video posts now that I have been completely away from all this insidious abuse.
Reflecting back with insightful educated knowledgeable eyes, demonstrates just how far I’ve come.
I could never express my sincere gratitude to all who helped me, but I think they know.
They are happy for me!!!
Thank you for your videos!!! 💙
Can say now that I been in a toxic relationship. For years an thought that argument.was not alright until.really saw the signs that he is never going too change..
I didnt see alot of ding, ding dings on these 10. Mine were his lack of respect, his irresponsiblity, his lieng, cheating, stealing his grandiosity, his manipulation, his raging, his mirroring me, and his flying monkeees.
My husband would say "if only you were Mormon, or only if you'd see if from my point of view" while discussing my character "flaws"
He tells me that my feelings are not hurt. That i have no reason to be hurt. Omg he hides and avoids me. Never spends time with my daughter
My partner always accuses me of trying to start a fight. She says I must love fighting. Every time I bring up a concern that I have. I have also said things to her like, "no, I know that isn't what you meant, you were implying this..." when I feel like I am being gaslighted. Can you expand on these two types of dynamics?
Thank you for this series. Was in my recommendations tonight and the timing was perfect. From 10 to 1 I could check off what just went down simply because I wanted to talk about an set of emails from earlier in the day. 3 hours and lots of corrections and boundary crossing later, began the series.
I've known since 3 months in that it was toxic. Ended it, just you find at 39, after a decade infertile, I was pregnant. It's nearly 5 years later because I want to protect our daughter, and because my health crashed after her birth and I've lived under the roofs he provided under so many conditions while I couldn't support myself and my now two kids (had a new teenager at the start also).
Right now I'm in school but he moved us 2 hours from my family and I've not made any friends here. I've wondered what to do. Our girl will be 4 in December and I know her spunky spirit will bring out his wrath eventually.
Thank you. Thank you so much. ❤
OMG!!!!!!! I heard so many time you just like drama, you always love blaming people!
I perceived this as the ex accusing me of being dishonest
+Kathy Brady Oh yes, that back and forth when the other insists that you are not being “truthful” about what you think, feel, remember, believe etc. and you insisting what you know is your truth. Projecting perhaps? He lies and so accuses you of lying?
THIS!!!
Yep.
Trouble is, when my ex narcissist husband was lying to me and I knew it, I would tell him that what he said he was doing/wanted/thought wasn't x but y. So I would do this myself as a defence. It's very, very difficult not to go down the reactive abuse road.
+Karn I know what you mean and yet after a while it becomes clear that your protests are just fuel for the fire and don’t go anywhere productive. If you are still in the relationship it’s important to validate yourself...just not to the abuser. You can validate yourself and simply say STOP. There is no need to explain yourself.
Yes I agree here. Dr Dart, watching your videos, I feel like I do something wrong whenever I would ‘react’ to my husbands lies and deceit and rationalizing and projection of all his years and years of cheating and entitlement mentality. I’d meekly call him out and it would sound like I was telling him what he was really thinking and feeling. I was trying to figure out a man that would never reveal himself to me. Does that make me abusive?? I don’t think I was!!
I’ve since STOPPED and moved out and moved on. But your comments give me pause, I feel off balance, as though I’ve done something wrong when I was defending my borders and calling him on his lies.
I love this series. Completely accurate and so incredibly helpful. Please share your email ID if possible.