3:28 LMFAO so true, especially here in New Zealand. We don't go up to a staff member, we just walk around the aisles for like 20 minutes before finding what we were looking for
As a doordash driver I gotta tell ya we are legally not allowed to open the bag and go through it to see if everything is there, we don't have a food handling license. Delivery of a sealed container/bag doesn't require one, but actually handling food does.
I work in retail; Costco. This guy hits the nail on the head on how painful it is to work in retail/customer service and deal with stupid ass customers.
His pitch to sponsors should be "Pay me and I'll do nothing. Specifically, I'll stop talking about your company." We're all sitting here wondering how he covers his expenses because he's clearly demonetised and he hasn't mentioned a sponsor. Meanwhile every episode as 25 sponsors.
3:59 that was certainly the most awkward cleanup to come over to for the worker. They just have a broom and they see the body and they're like "uhh.. is this the mess? Nah. I dont get paid enough." And just walks away.
3:34 - Exactly, this associate gets it. You wouldn't believe how many times customers asked me stuff (specifically the same thing) where there is literally a giant sign that says it. Customers likes wasting more time finding associates than finding a product. Which I think is easier than finding an associate.
The youtuber one got me. Because every youtuber I watched as a kid went threw that all. The 15% express VPN was so funny to me because I know a youtuber that's always getting sponsored by them
I'm going to be honest here. You probably have the absolute best sense of Humour I've ever seen. And if making people laugh is your main goal, then you should be GODDAMN proud.
The retail store one was more like if retail customers were honest:"Help! I need help finding this very simple thing that is clearly marked, both by a sign hanging above my head, as well as an entire section of it!"
I came across this video and OH MY GOSH I watched barely 3mins 30secs of it and my stomach and throat are HURTING from laughing SO DAMN HARD. The humor is OUTSSTANDING. I know a few people who would absolutely laugh their butts off at this video. Excellent job with the humor. The fact you can keep a straight face the whole time makes it that much more funny. You sir need a TV show like others have said. I needed a little break to relax my stomach and my body so i can laugh a lot more.
You can fly Spirit for like $30, but your check in bag is $60 and a pop is $4 and a beer is $10, it's ridiculously easy to spend as much as a first class flight on Delta and still hate it. Thank you for flying Spirit.
These were mostly funny (and accurate), but I’m going to have to complain about the hotel one. My dad’s a platinum member at one chain, and they would literally move mountains if he asked them to. I know that doesn’t speak for all of them, but hotels are far random in quality than a Chick-fil-A or McDonalds.
Ever since I found one of your videos, I decided to watch more of them, I really love your sense of humor and this compilation is pretty amazing, keep up the good work!
Taco Bell: "Welcome to Taco Bell, sir. I'm glad you were able to make it inside while we actually had our doors unlocked so you didn't have to sit 2 hours in our drive thru line." Lando: "Thanks. Hey, I noticed your prices have gone up." Taco Bell: "Yeah, we're still having trouble getting people to buy our disgusting breakfast at 7 AM so we had to double our advertising budget and hire *more* obnoxious celebrities to sell our crap." Lando: "I'd like a Burrito Especial Combo. That's the one with 80% rice and a scoop of "beef" which is actually mostly grain filler. Right?" Taco Bell: "Great choice sir, that will be $11.43. Be sure to come back in an hour when you're inevitably hungry again after taking a massive s**t 10 minutes after finishing."
Probably insoired by his actual experiences as a customer at all these companies. It's not Straight-Faced Comedy; it's Restrained Rage expressed as Sarcasm.
This guy is a legend! He should have so much more subscribers :D My favorite video is the "How to be a millionaire" :))) I follow his advice every day, after a light 7-mile run.
OMG the RUclips parody was spot on - I am so sick and tired of 6 minute videos with 2 minutes of sponsor crap - a 30 second intro that sucks and then 2 minutes of begging to buy merch, subscribe and like - nailed it
GIVE THIS MAN HIS OWN TV SHOW! ABSOLUTELY HYSTERICAL!
You’re too kind thank you😂
He is not kind he is to right 🤣🤣
@@landokalriz you deserve your own Netflix series
@@landokalriz Netflix has an offer for you
Ur right
His straight face literally kills me
😂🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
You after seeing his face💀
@@landokalriz holy shit its yoyu
@@polakrodak8538 lmfaoo
it’s gonna kill you literally
These videos are SOO underrated! The emotionless sentences always be killing me 😂
😂dry and sarcastic is my entire life, lol
Lmao
@@landokalriz I literally talk hella sarcastic when being brutally honest and Not giving a shit
Bro reappeared, how? He was incognito.
@@landokalrizme too when I’m brutally honest but comical when I joke around
Timestamps:
- 0:00 Subway
- 0:36 Chipotle
- 1:28 Apple (2030)
- 2:21 Whole Foods
- 3:04 Retail Stores
- 4:00 Starbucks
- 4:46 Costco
- 5:39 Arby’s
- 6:29 Click-fli-A
- 7:17 Banks
- 8:21 Hotels
- 9:05 McDonald’s
- 10:00 DoorDash
- 10:43 Waffle House
- 11:15 Spirit Airlines
- 12:04 RUclipsrs be like
I can't even comment on the KFC that I work at.
The mcdonald's one XD
No one asked
@@tirubachiniechetty51 no one cares +i don't care
@@Poland3500 do I look like I care
4:46 As a Costco employee. I can definitely find this perfectly accurate. 😂
😂😂
cool
Expect for the shirt because it have to be a collar shirt at my Costco
@@sonicboom2468 same for mine but we don’t care about the color
Does every costco look near the same on the inside
The fact that this man can keep a straight face is amazing. I laugh every time 😂 keep it up!
😂thanks man Preciate it❤
Facts
*Bet that there’s been over 10 shots of him lauaghing but never showed it.*
@@landokalrizI’m shocked you have bloopers
That takes so much skill and talent, I'd be laughing my ass off if I tried to do this lmfaoo😂😂😂
“We have plenty of employees to help you with that… but none of them will help you with that.” 😂 got me
I'm so glad you chose to make this into a compilation. Thank you for this!
Thank you for watching man❤
That point about nobody asks to find shit in Retail Food stores is so on point. 🤣🤣🤣
3:28 LMFAO so true, especially here in New Zealand. We don't go up to a staff member, we just walk around the aisles for like 20 minutes before finding what we were looking for
As a doordash driver I gotta tell ya we are legally not allowed to open the bag and go through it to see if everything is there, we don't have a food handling license. Delivery of a sealed container/bag doesn't require one, but actually handling food does.
“We only sell our meat by the cow” that got me 💀
I work in retail; Costco. This guy hits the nail on the head on how painful it is to work in retail/customer service and deal with stupid ass customers.
this man is singlehandedly exposing so many companies.
if a rebellion starts on any of these companies i think Lando will be the one leading it
5:40 THE WHOLE ARBY SCENCE OMG I ALMOST DIED 😂😂 KEEP ON THE GOOD WORK!:)
Me too!!!!!🤣🤣
Arby’s we don’t have the fucking meats
The Chick-fil-A is pretty accurate also love your content!
Thank you bro❤
My pleasure
Bros using a Nintendo switch
Really hope you get big soon. Your content is so original and hilarious
IKR
My family cannot afford Taxing Tim Ryan
Thank you😅❤
3:05 I do indeed work at Kroger and that is exactly what goes through my mind when people ask me where something is in the store
“I’m gonna eat it regardless”
I feel like that’s why food companies keep getting away with crap. 😂
Yeah consumers are idiots
Lando's straight face is the absolute human version of the😐emoji. Absolutely hilarious 🤣
His pitch to sponsors should be "Pay me and I'll do nothing. Specifically, I'll stop talking about your company." We're all sitting here wondering how he covers his expenses because he's clearly demonetised and he hasn't mentioned a sponsor. Meanwhile every episode as 25 sponsors.
"Get out of my car or I will kill us both"
Jesus that went from a 2 to a 10 very quick XD
Your skits are so funny and seem so rude but you’re so wholesome in the comments. You deserve more.
Thanks my dude I appreciate it🙏🏼
'Name and FUCKING ADDRESS please" that killed me 💀
As a McDonald's worker, this is 100% accurate
😂
How do you not laugh doing this, this content is gold
😂that’s my dry sarcasm at work, and thank you🙏🏼
@@landokalriz Np bro
It's not funny. It's the truth.
Disgusting society we have.
I found him through shorts and now i m addicted to his content.. keep up the great work mate
Thanks watching man i appreciate you🙏🏼🙏🏼
Messi the goat 🐐
🇮🇷🇮🇶
The retail worker skit is so accurate in regards to what customers do.
3:59 that was certainly the most awkward cleanup to come over to for the worker. They just have a broom and they see the body and they're like "uhh.. is this the mess? Nah. I dont get paid enough." And just walks away.
Dude that pokemon Go in the "follow me on everything" part was too pro
The Chick-Fil-A one is no joke. I once went there for lunch and the drive-thru line was all the way to the shoulder of the highway.
The f me jokes always get me😂. This guy is amazing keep up the amazing comedy😂
Thank youu🙌🏼
Every time this man leaves me dying from laughter
In the Chick-Fil-A video, he is carrying a freaking Nintendo Switch as a tablet. Now that is some improvisation! 😆
Customer: "Im guessing the McRib is gone?"
McDonalds: "Yes, only when you're here"
😅
3:34 - Exactly, this associate gets it. You wouldn't believe how many times customers asked me stuff (specifically the same thing) where there is literally a giant sign that says it. Customers likes wasting more time finding associates than finding a product. Which I think is easier than finding an associate.
1:06 it’s funny how the customer automatically knows that it’s a no when he makes that face 😂😂😂
If UPS was honest, "Our delivery drivers never close their driver doors."
"And I don't suppose the ice cream machine still works?" That's a stupid fucking question sir.😂😂😂
This dude deserves his own TV show and much more I love your videos.
The fact you can do all this with a straight face is just absolute Chad-tier 😂
The youtuber one got me. Because every youtuber I watched as a kid went threw that all. The 15% express VPN was so funny to me because I know a youtuber that's always getting sponsored by them
THIS MAN HAS MASTERED COMEDY
😂😂no such thing my friend
"that's the wrong name and you spelt the wrong name wrong" 😂
I'm going to be honest here. You probably have the absolute best sense of Humour I've ever seen. And if making people laugh is your main goal, then you should be GODDAMN proud.
Dude your too kind🙏🏼🙏🏼
The retail store one was more like if retail customers were honest:"Help! I need help finding this very simple thing that is clearly marked, both by a sign hanging above my head, as well as an entire section of it!"
BRO I HAVE NEVER LAUGHED SO HARD!🤣🤣
😂😂
@@landokalrizme too especially when you bleep out the swear words
This man is fricking hilarious. I can't😂
😂😂
“NAME AND FUCKING ADDRESS” 😂😂
I came across this video and OH MY GOSH I watched barely 3mins 30secs of it and my stomach and throat are HURTING from laughing SO DAMN HARD. The humor is OUTSSTANDING. I know a few people who would absolutely laugh their butts off at this video. Excellent job with the humor. The fact you can keep a straight face the whole time makes it that much more funny. You sir need a TV show like others have said. I needed a little break to relax my stomach and my body so i can laugh a lot more.
I really enjoy your videos, they make me laugh daily 😂❤
Glad to hear it😊
5:09 Selling meat by the cow lmao
I love how for chick-fil-a he is holding a switch
best content ever, please do about introvert in schools
Thanks man❤
@@landokalriz don't mention it,wish you all best of luck in life
This dude roasted every company, and i respect the hell out of him for it
You can fly Spirit for like $30, but your check in bag is $60 and a pop is $4 and a beer is $10, it's ridiculously easy to spend as much as a first class flight on Delta and still hate it. Thank you for flying Spirit.
To this day, the "If Apple was honest" is the funniest to me.
These were mostly funny (and accurate), but I’m going to have to complain about the hotel one. My dad’s a platinum member at one chain, and they would literally move mountains if he asked them to. I know that doesn’t speak for all of them, but hotels are far random in quality than a Chick-fil-A or McDonalds.
Your sarcasm is on next level bro 😂
Found your shorts recently now I'm addicted to these 😅🤣🤣
😂thanks man🙏🏼
@@landokalrizme too
"We don't believe in saving money, sir" My favorite
My dad got mad because of how loud I was laughing, one of the best videos I'VE seen!
GIVE THIS GUY A WHOLE MOVIE OR PARODIES ITS TOO PERFECT MY GUY AND ITS TRUE
Ever since I found one of your videos, I decided to watch more of them, I really love your sense of humor and this compilation is pretty amazing, keep up the good work!
Thanks bro I appreciate it!
This was hilarious, and so darn spot-on! Fantastic job! I could see something like this being in Family Guy! 🤣
6:36 bro holding a nintendo switch lmao
Real companies trying to sue this man right now
I WAS LITERALLY SEARCHING FOR A COMPILATION OF YOUR VIDEOS LIKE 3 DAYS AGO AND YOU DROPPED THIS.
THANK YOU.
😂thanks for watching!
@@landokalriz no no, thank YOU.
His videos are better than what Hollywood can produce. At least it’s a million times better than Hollywood comedy
Please do Dunkin donuts, Auntie Anne's , uber Wal-Mart or target next time. You are so funny .
I work in retail this is too freaking accurate
Taco Bell: "Welcome to Taco Bell, sir. I'm glad you were able to make it inside while we actually had our doors unlocked so you didn't have to sit 2 hours in our drive thru line."
Lando: "Thanks. Hey, I noticed your prices have gone up."
Taco Bell: "Yeah, we're still having trouble getting people to buy our disgusting breakfast at 7 AM so we had to double our advertising budget and hire *more* obnoxious celebrities to sell our crap."
Lando: "I'd like a Burrito Especial Combo. That's the one with 80% rice and a scoop of "beef" which is actually mostly grain filler. Right?"
Taco Bell: "Great choice sir, that will be $11.43. Be sure to come back in an hour when you're inevitably hungry again after taking a massive s**t 10 minutes after finishing."
The RUclipsrs one is SO accurate. The only thing that would make it better is if the sponsor was Established Titles...
😂 the idea that chik fil a sends employees 7 miles down the road 😂
Probably depends on how long the drive through line is... oh, yeah, he touched on that one too.
I literally can’t take the strait face. How does he do it. I love a good laugh. lol. Great job
Probably insoired by his actual experiences as a customer at all these companies. It's not Straight-Faced Comedy; it's Restrained Rage expressed as Sarcasm.
10:58 "Just kidding, sir, no one has teeth here."
Meanwhile...Lando Kalriz, with his well-maintained chompers
" Is the ice cream machine still not working?"
" Now that's a stupid fucking question."
Truth at its's finest! 😂
MAN THE STARBUCKS ONE!!!!!!!🤣🤣
its crazy because our macdonalds here in south africa NEVER HAS ICE CREAM too
0:01 me eating a foot long turkey pepperoni with cheese:🤣🤣
F*** me with steak please 😂 also I don’t know how this guy doesn’t break down laughing 😂
This guy is a legend! He should have so much more subscribers :D My favorite video is the "How to be a millionaire" :))) I follow his advice every day, after a light 7-mile run.
😂😂you’ll be a billionaire before ya know it
"That's the wrong name and you spelt the wrong name wrong" they do be doing that billshit i ain't gon cap
Waffle house looking not open was relatable af 😂
i have never experienced either of that (except the youtuber part i guess), ifeel left out. still enjoyable to watch though. :)
4:34 what’s your name, uhh Chris, perfect this right, that’s the wrong name and you spelled the wrong name wrong, whatever I tried 😂 lol
Do you wash your hands?
No sir, we don't wash anything here😭😭🤣🤣
The Costco one Jesus christ I’m dying💀💀
😂😂
I never knew how passive aggressive someone could be until I watched this video
bro you are so funny keep doing what you are doing and you will go places
Thank you 😆
OMG the RUclips parody was spot on - I am so sick and tired of 6 minute videos with 2 minutes of sponsor crap - a 30 second intro that sucks and then 2 minutes of begging to buy merch, subscribe and like - nailed it
2:33 Free-range apples lmao
The mcdonalds guy was so respectful while giving no f*cks
Hilarious 😂 very good content and 100% relatable
This is why I like RUclips shorts, some shorts creators that make these humorous skits make the platform reminiscent of old Vine and that's awesome
any chip bag is 90% air 0:08
Bro the subway one killed me and these are so funny man companies really be like this😂😂😢😂😂😂😅
THIS MADE ME ALMOST PEE MYSELF! LMFAO! THIS MAN DESERVES 10 MILLION SUBSCRIBERS!
OMG You are absolutely brilliant. I'm about to watch your entire back catalogue until I can no longer see. I might have to skip work and everything.😂
6:59, He uses a nintendo switch lol
You are my favorite creator! Thank you for the endless laughs! Keep it up!