Could You Be Having A Mid-Life Crisis? This Might Help You.
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- Опубликовано: 8 сен 2024
- I had a midlife crisis period of several years where I made a whole bunch of life-changing decisions that worked out for the better but were pretty strange at the time. I decided to make this video to help all my subscribers (and others) who are millennials or Genx folks and have not yet hit the critical age of 47-52 years old. And to help all of those who are right now experiencing the stresses and anxieties that go along with this time in life. I also made this video for those of you who have gone through it and gotten to the other side and know that for the most part, things do improve in your outlook and your level of stress etc. I found the study in The Economist Magazine about two months ago. A midlife crisis seems to be an experience had by many many people worldwide. It appears biological to me although I don't believe that anyone has studied it from that point of view. If you are in the midst of one, I wish you to be kind to yourself and realize that this period of angst will end. If you are not yet of that age, expect it to come and you will have an easier time of it when it does. I apologize for the bad sound. I wasn't paying attention to my lav microphone and there is some distortion in this recording.
"David Hoffman. Filmmaker. Bird by my side."
Lol 😆🤣
I have an actual pet bird (Green cheek Conure - a type of parrot) that keep on my shoulder all tge time, and i will now start introducing myself with "...bird by my side" every chance i get.
I had a smile and a laugh at the end of that sentence.
@@the_original_Bilb_Ono Aw , I love Conures. So intelligent and friendly little fellas .
Cool bird👍
I went through it. I'm 61 and life is the best it has ever been. I practice gratitude and kindness everyday, ain't nothing better.
Like that practice gratitude and kindness
This is what such as RUclips should be for, to share our life's experiences, hopefully to learn from each others path through the human condition. Excellent, thank you Mr. Hoffman.
I think somewhere between 40 and 45,, that’s when you realized “shit, My life sucks and it’s all too late for me to change.” Or “ my life wasn’t suppose to be this way!!!” Or “ damn, I really should’ve work harder when my energy level was better”. Phases. That’s when depression hits like a ton of brick. 🥲
To be honest, if you took a different path, it might have been better, but it also could have been much worse.
Don't beat yourself up, there's still time to do things a little differently
I’m about to turn 40 and I feel exactly like that. Anxiety,depression,self doubt, un satisfied, regretful about what I have done and haven’t but should have done.
@@botijaism Seek God.
You send "be kind to yourself" and i started crying. I'm 34.
Beautiful. Nothing wrong with a good cry.
David Hoffman filmmaker
Hahaha... Sorry. No one saw right? XD I'm just kidding.
@@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker Talk about synchronicity ... I'm 34 too, and when David said that, I had goosebumps. Thanks.
Same, David has a reality to his words that hits home for me personally, like a social worker in the digital world who is self aware of the people he's helping.
Dang bro I’ve been an emotional wreck myself lately. I’m 45 years old and now im fighting harder than ever just to be happy. I’m got giving up any time soon. 🤨.
When I was 35 i experienced a catastrophe, was forced to move across the country. My wife and I split a year and a half later. I thought that’s as my midlife crisis. So I joked I’d only live to 70. But at 46 I started experiencing pain and fatigue and worse anxiety so I started going to the gym. At 47 I quit drinking. I started thinking more strategically about certain things. Then, on my 50th bday, one week after shut down started. I fell apart completely. Been building myself back up since March. But no drastic changes yet.
You can do it!
By which I mean to say thanks for this
Stick with David's community, a lot of folks to cheer you back to the feelings you deserve.
Hello. It’s all in your head. Everything is going to be alright. Just take care of yourself and try not to worry.
I needed to read this all I do is worry and have anxiety
Man I’m depressed now in my 30’s- I can’t imagine it getting worse. Hopefully I can turn things around.
Get it changed or addressed quickly...it goes fast...
Always have plans for the future, things to achieve that makes you feel enthusiasm. Act on enthusiasm.
@@Unconditional---love people who suffer from true depression aren't able to experience enthusiasm though...
Maybe simply going through a depressed time, although if one suffers from depression - then they aren't able to experience the same motivations, feeling, emotions, etc.
@ 53 I moved from my rental house, of 13+ years...into a mini van! I worked fulltime, had enough money...I was happy! Two years later (and two vans later) I quit my job and bought a small class B. 6 months after...I met a homeless gal, to help her?...she is now in my van #2, just to sleep and get out of the cold...till we can find her housing. I'm thankful I CAN help...
God bless us ALL! 💓
Thank you old man now I can prepare for these crises and counter it
So nice to hear from the generation that’s been through it! I’m 49 and experiencing the lowest low. my long term relationship ended a week before covid lock down. I find myself single and aging and without the energy to date (not to mention the restrictions during covid) or the belief that i’m dateable as my face wrinkles more with each day and I feel so lost in so many ways. My 3 kids who were my priority for the last 21 years all began college so i find myself an empty nester. my means of making an income completely disappeared and i find myself penniless and with incredible doubt that i have the capacity to reinvent this aspect of my life. Perimenopause is hitting hard, causing weight gain, low energy, migraines, memory issues, general brain fog and anxiety. Damn you reproductive hormones 😒my sweet feline friend, my cat just died. it’s a lot to happen all at once. i’m exercising and meditating, eating healthy. But still, i’ve never been so low and lost. just praying for some divine spark to pick me up and show me the way
My hope, almost certainty, for you is that something will pick up. Keep your eyes and ears attuned to the possible serendipities that are around you. And they will come and offer themselves to you. Just keep thinking positive thoughts so that the universe knows what you need next.
David Hoffman filmmaker
I'm 42, thanks for the heads up Dave, all the best. 🇬🇧
I'll never understand how people who aren't mentally ill think about their teen years like it was the best decade of their life. I'm 23, I've spent the past decade of my life recovering from social anxiety disorder and clinical depression. Only in maybe the past 5 years have I felt like I've truly begun to start living. I'd like to think I got at least some of my suffering over with early, so maybe by the time I'm 55 the crisis won't hit me so hard. The way I see it, things can only move up from here.
Same here
I'm 24 but this still is good to know. Thank you
My only advice is never give up on your goals in life never put them off think you can get to that later in life. Also never compromise on what you want out of life. Only you can control what you do in life your choices. Then when you hit your 50's look back know you did your best during the time of your life when you could make a difference for rest of your life.
My life has been, one, never ending crisis. Just when I was calming, at 65, down, along comes Covid! I will survive! Happy Thanksgiving David and my David Hoffman family! Love you all! Be safe!
Hello! I’m 53, an empty nester, and married to the same wonderful man for 31 years, but I do agree that there is a shift that happens to you between 47 to 52. I had to learn that I still had value, and a whole life ahead of me. I am Thankful for a good family, and looking forward to future.😊
I feel like my mental, emotional and physical life bottomed out at 52-53. Now as I approach 58 in a few weeks, I feel much more hopeful, I'm enjoying creative hobbies, I'm enjoying life. Even with all the uncertainties of 2020 and dangers of Covid 19, my life feels better and better the further I get from "47-52". I certainly empathize with anyone still going through that low period.
I didn’t really know what a midlife crisis meant until I watched this.
I bought a motorcycle a few years ago. People saying it was a midlife crisis. I just laughed. It wasn’t and isn’t. I just can afford one now.
Now at 47 I’m in one. Don’t want to be married anymore, don’t want to be in this house at this job & some days in this life. I don’t know how to move on from this. I’m in a crisis.
David Hoffman,, I don't know alot about someone having a mid life crisis. But here is something that makes my life change each time I think of it. I'm only 39 years old and my father is 74.. Him and I are inseparable. My biggest fear is losing my father and facing the horrible void of him being gone one day... I'm sure that is a natural feeling that everyone goes through. But it's so hard to wrap my head around it.
I’m in the same situation as you are. It’s something that just has to happen one day to everyone. That’s life. There’s no way around it. Enjoy your life the best way possible because it’s over in the blink of an eye.
At 47 years old I thought about my own needs a lot then a dog named Star came into my life and everything changed. I believe it softened my midlife crisis that was erupting at the time I rescued her. I’m now 55 and have accepted getting older. Don’t like it but realize if your lucky in this life you get to be older longer than being younger. Thank you David Hoffman- filmmaker
I'm 45. I find all the reflective comments on this topic very helpful. Its great to be able to distill insight from all of your lives. Its usually so personal that being exposed to such wisdom only happens once in a while. Thank you all.
Yes! Big time! I started at 46. I'm 49 now, and hopefully it's behind me. I feel so much better now. Felt awful before
Oh man. I’m right smack in the middle of the 47-52 year old group. A lot of things are happening in my life. My daughter is getting married soon. I’ve been thinking of when I can retire comfortably. I’m turning 51 soon and i don’t want to wait until I’m 65 to retire. I have so many uncertainties that I will face in the future.
Thanks David. I am younger than you and went to film school in 2003-2007. The days of Classic film making are over but the true sense to the stories will always live. Thanks for your notes.
I think so -- but there will always be some big screen films as well.
David Hoffman Filmmaker
David Hoffman yes the big screen movies and the personal RUclips’s like your channel. God bless and happy thanksgiving!
I’m there 51 and yes they is definitely a 5 year curve in the road so to speak
I think it’s more of the realization that you are 1/2 way through life and all the things you wanted to do when you were young are long gone behind you and you are facing the “end” of the road that once seemed endless
a wonderful mantra . "Be kind to yourself" . Thank you David , a great gift for any age . Blessings .
Today is my 45th birthday so this is good for me to hear.
I appreciate the short conversation on the topic! Your work is and has been amazing! Thank you for all of your hard work
yes, i am 47 and defiantly anxiety and depression hit hard, never before as bad, i have spent the last year just winging it, and am gradually moving forward, but yes, something kicks in at that age that is hard, thanks for the heads up! I think biology plays a part in it and life circumstance, but something chemical changes at this age , its seems that the mind and body are going through some watershed and the climb has become stepper, good to hear that it gets easier on the other side though!
Your testosterone is tanking. That will definitely bring anxiety and depression
Sir Hoffman, thank You for sharing your experiences, and for advices. I like you a lot, you are a very good man. Im born 1985 (35yrs old), and now i know what to do when i come to that point in my life. Once again, thank You.
Regards from Adriatic Sea - Croatia
I’m 48 right now, and I get this. I had a good friend drop dead from a heart attack last year right after he turned 47. It really affected him. I will stay vigilant. In the last few months, I feel like my energy has been sapped. I’ve fought through and kept exercising, but I can’t figure out what is wrong. This might answer it, or at least some of it. My career/job is going better than ever, but being closed in has affected me very negatively. I love getting out and interacting with clients, colleagues, etc. It has take a lot of joy out of what I do for a living.
I just read a comment about testosterone dropping and getting mental and physical problems. Look in to it. Maybe that could help you
You are a gem Sir!
Yes. Happened right in that time. Went wacky. Affairs, crazyiness. A bit lost. It ended about at 53. Now 66 , I am still married and very happy. Ups and downs but at least im not running crazy. Glad not alone in this chart. 😉
Peace to you all. Breathe!
I had a brain injury almost 2 yrs ago,felt pretty good a couple of months after. Then I hit 46 and anxiety and some depression has kicked in ! Now at 47 I wake up with pure dread get about 4 hrs of sleep a night, I cry for the littlest things , my migraines have gotten worse. It's good to that I'm not the only one going through this,. Thank you for this video it gave reassurance.
Thanks for the advice for the people currently going through it, as well as for the future. I'm only 28, but God willing, I'll make it to 50 someday. Knowing my mental health history, I have no doubt I'll struggle with this. I've always been kind of a basket case, so I hope I'll make it through.
I was 45 when I had my anxiety attack. Never had it before. Following that comes the lingering physical symptoms of anxiety. Managing it and taking one day at a time. Three years later anxiety symptoms come and go. Accepting and embracing this as part of a human nature now. Great to hear the light is brighter on the other side. Thank you for sharing David!
Ok, I'm turning 48 next year. I live with a lot of back pain/health problems but definitely deal with depression. Didn't understand it at all until a couple years ago. I would hear of people with depression and think, pull your head out of you know where and get busy working, playing or helping someone else! Boy was I wrong! I didn't even answer the phone half the time. I'm better than I was but it's still a battle. You slip into it little at a time and don't even realize! At least for me that's how it goes.
As far as the mid life charts that you showed, I had know idea! Very interesting. Perhaps I'm not completely crazy! Ha ha!
Thanks! I really enjoy your videos!
I’m sorry to hear about what you’ve gone through, bad enough chronic pain can drive anyone mad. I’m glad that you were able to gain empathy and perspective from your experience with pain and depression and I hope that you’re doing better now.
@@acardinalconsideration824 Thank you. One day at a time friend.
By the way, do you ever do stretches for your back pain? Stretches helped a lot with mine. Mine used to be really bad due to scoliosis, but stretching out the area helped tremendously.
I think at his time - 25 years ago - it was that age...today the “mid-life” crisis for better or worse, is closer to 60. We are “younger” longer so that’s good, and we certainly aren’t living to 120, but my experience is that it has to do with the need to accept mortality. It happens later. He does get to where it’s actually 55, and I agree it started at 55 and ended at 61ish. The “crisis” doesn’t happen overnight and it isn’t dealt with overnight. It is the acceptance that our time here is finite and we are dealing with it later than we did 25 years ago, and we are enjoying life longer and our youth isn’t washed up at 36 for women and 40 for men, thank God. 👍🏻💪🏻🙏🏻
Well, for most women it's menopause time. For people of both genders it's the age when many are losing parents, or caring for elderly, infirm parents. If there are children, they'll likely be at 'that age' (early to mid teens) when the parent starts to get a sense of losing closeness, if they're being typical teenagers! Lots of factors. Some would factor-in the 'male menopause', swearing that it's as real as the female transition. Very interesting vid, as always.
If I'm having a midlife crisis now at age 69....well, I guess I oughta perk up since I'll live to be 140. 😎
Thanks for another worthwhile video. You are a valuable human being David.
49 years old guy almost 50. I always thought that I would be more successful financially and otherwise by this age. Thanks for this video it’s nice for all of us to know we’re not crazy or alone.
I sincerely have been thinking I'm going crazy with emotions. Never felt this way in my life before. I'm actually 46 and start feeling something at 44. Thank you for this video. 🙂
This is terrifying. I'm 25 now, and I've spent my life anxious, depressed, and generally overwhelmed. I was raised by my grandparents, who were both very ill throughout my entire childhood, leaving them completely unavailable as parental figures. In 9th grade, my grandmother passed away, and in 10th, my grandfather followed.
I had to quit school, work, and lied about my age to get into an apartment. After a while, I started using drugs, and hitch hiked around the entire united states from the time I was 18, to about 23. Now, I struggle to put my life together in any meaningful way, and see the youth that I've been leaning on for support slipping away. I don't want to die, but I'm seriously concerned about my ability to continue throughout this life, especially with the challenges that come with being in your 30s and 40s.
Although this video was helpful, I feel more afraid about the struggle ahead than I did before, and don't know what to do.
Luckily, I'm sober, still young, and happen to live in one of the most resource filled spots in the country, so change is still possible. I'm just worried that I'll miss the last of my opportunites to improve because I'm so far behind, and obsessively preoccupied with catching up. It's like the song Time, by Pink Floyd. Haha. No one told you when to run, you missed the starting gunNn *guitar solo*.
Don't look back, stay sober work often and be wise with your money
take one day or even one hour at a time.
Don't waste anymore of your health on drugs. I know it's something you did as a coping strategy I understand. I don't want you to treat yourself like garbage. I can't give you the answer( mainly bc I'm at a midlife crisis 40)
lost years never to return. But I will say the crisis is our inner pain and giving ourselves permission to live..live for ourselves. I started to look up the word addiction and try to link it w some other thoughts..in my crisis ( which I cry a lot uncontrollably) I came to the conclusion addiction killed my only sister..it was from her past trauma ( fentanyl OD 8 years ago) she left behind a child ...I did a horrible job w her child and mine bc I spent all those years trying to save my mom( drug addict since I can remember) and dragged my kids through all the evil and drama trying to save grandma. So one thing I took away this week ( bc I'm just crushed and feel robbed in my soul) is addiction killed my sister.. addiction will kill me...am I on drugs? No. drink ?smoke? No all these 20 years no. But I addicted myself to people,pride( I'm strong I can fight,I can save them) I addicted myself to me being something to everybody.. so the results is when they get buried a piece of me is buried w them and I die over and over. Often I just wanted to sit amongst the graves bc I felt like a grave yard inside. I never was my own person..I was conditioned by my family to serve my mom. ( Also took care of her mom and for awhile my mother inlaw) when I was a teen I lived on the streets of downtown Portland no one cared for me many times I could have died myself..over the past year I really wanted some women to just lift me up ( it's never going to happen). parents love is our first dignity ..I never got that so you allow yourself to mistreat yourself by different means.. some socially acceptable ways to mistreat yourself is serving everybody else and neglecting yourself to the point of permanent types of damage. Socially unacceptable would be drugs.. or starving yourself ..you can visually detect that so it's not so acceptable...so you won't be so approved.. yet all those ways kill people, all of them are types of addiction. Addiction is a coping strategy to take care of trauma. I'm just now trying to address severe grief. At some point you might have to also. Grief you didn't have a childhood, grief of the Lost Time, grief of the time you maybe lost out on jobs or relationships they're all types of loss..we often don't acknowledge them. But I'm here to warn you I'm 40 and it will all come back to you and it will be a ton of bricks. Because besides that you'll also have the stigma associated with your age. Take it one step at a time NOW building up your dignity and yourself NOW. If you didn't have a parent to help you with your health or teach you how to take care of your body ...start doing it NOW I don't care what age you are .
If your parent told you you couldn't do anything or are stupid ..NOW you need to go past fear and do the things that scare you. I'm in a really grief filled place now, but I wish you all the life. and I hope you can think about a future now and don't tell yourself you can't. You have a right to a life..it starts was setting boundaries ( I never did) and treating yourself better. We can compare ourselves to other people who had families ..and that only makes things worse. I did it for years and was jealous.It just made me have more pain and anger inside. Please just find your talents and let them grow. It's hard to have direction when no one was directing you in the first place. And it's hard to care when you weren't feeling all the Care in the first place. This can be a confusing life..but I know you have so much ahead of you. Please try to enjoy it. Get away from the toxic people, the people that demand your servitude. And take up your glass and work to fill it yourself. Wish you the best please take care.
At first the regrets set in. One day you learn to live with and accept those decisions and realize that you did the best you could. There’s no way of knowing that if you took the other path, that things would be any better or worse. Enter into the next phase, which is that of embracement. Don’t just accept your life and the decisions that got you there. Begin to fully appreciate everything you have and don’t have. Embrace your situation as if you wouldn’t have it any other way.
Thanks for taking the time to address this, something that is obviously an actual issue. Us men, and in my generation (genX, I'm 46) we are demonized by academia and the media. I personally deal with may of the same issues that you highlighted, and I'm getting out of my head and embracing many of the things that truly made me happy in my earlier days.
Thanks for the upload, homie
Thank you for trying to help people. Me, I just turned 60, and I felt a lot of weird feelings about that, but I am trying to adjust. It would REALLY be helpful, wouldn’t it, to speak to all of the 14-year old boys, but I don’t believe they’d listen (even though they SHOULD) I guess that’s just how it is.
I'm 23.... why does it feel like i've been through everything he said should happen at 47
Social media I guess and the way bad news has infiltrated our every waking second.
Thats normal, youre supposed to feel this way in your 20s. Youre figuring out life, and have little experience with it. I feel the same way, but its not a midlife crisis, its just life. Everyone goes through it, but not everyone comes out of it. Id suggest reading and learning as much as you can about life and how to make the best of it, how to view it and perceive it. That helped me deal with it, but it does still linger.
Same and I am 18
Speaking as someone who’s only 23 myself, it’s because we don’t have enough perspective yet. I’ve dealt with a good amount of death anxiety/existential anxiety by this point, but the looming reality of death and the ephemeral nature of existence will only become more and more clear the older we get. One of the most constructive things we can do is become as accepting of the inevitability of death as soon as we possibly can, the sooner the better.
We live in a though period, despite the pandemic. Social media, for example, wants to sell us happiness, but, when we lay our heads in our beds, we don´t see that coming. I can blame it for a lot of anxiety people are having
I'm 53, recently bought a black trans am, married a 27yo, started bungy jumping.
Nothing to see here ! : / ....
You're vids are pure poetry, big thank you to the genuine humanitarian in
you David Hoffman : ) .
Thank you. I know I'm not alone; and I'm normal. My mother said to me, as if it were a pimple or a crappy day, "You're just having a midlife crisis." Hearing someone say it's hard helps me know she was minimizing what is the world to me.
(child of a boomer, here: Having your feelings minimized and being told how to feel all my life caused me to suffer from Enmeshment Trauma. I've had to learn who I am in my mid 40s rather than in my teens/20s)
Plus, an added stress for women at that age is entering menopause and the many. many changes that go along with that. Like you said, be kind to yourself and it all gets better with age. I'm turning 60 this Saturday so feel qualified to say that. :-)
I call it MENTAL PAUSE. Both gals and guys! Happy 60!
@@luciehanson6250 Mental pause for sure and thanks! :-)
Happy 60th birthday on Saturday, MrsC48 :D
Best wishes from me in Australia...Cj
.
@@klyvemurray Thank you so much CJ! :-)
Psychedelics, meditation, and exploration of mind, body, and soul may help to curb or prevent altogether a midlife crisis. Listen to your own inner voice regarding who you are and what life means to you, not the voice of others! Peace and love!
Hehehe, timely. I'm 45 and have always worked and had a great worth ethic. I quit my job last year, kind of office spaced it, and am thinking of moving from the east coast, to LA where my best friend lives. It would feel bad moving away from my family. I'm Major Depressive. Veteran. Live alone. Find it hard to get out of bed. Need to do something before it gets worse.
Did you move? How is it going?
@@ecantu2600 Exactly how I was a year ago headspace wise. Still thinking about Cali, but my parents are old and it's hard to move so far away. 🥺 Still needing a change but lost. Thanks for asking. ❤️
Had mine at 50.
Sold the big home in SF moved to NYC. Gave away the car. Got rid of 90% of my stuff.
Life got better.
Considering how horrific and depressing my teens, 20s and 30s were, I cant see it getting much worse. I've actually felt a sight uptick in the last year or so. But thanks to nothing specific.
About to turn 21. After severe depression for most of the last decade I'd like to think I'm working through some of my midlife crisis now
I got you, bro. I'm not even 25 yet, and I already have midlife crisis :(
Things will get better, just keep trying bro ❤
@@zNblack00 at 21 & 25 your both still young. You have your whole lives ahead of you. I’m 43 but still feel there’s lots ahead in life. Don’t spend the best decade of your life feeling negative. Go and travel. thats what I did at 21. I spent 18 months travelling around Asia, Australia and New Zealand and it was the best thing I ever did. Now I’m married with kids but at least I can look back and say I had a small adventure in my life, and you should do the same👍
@@matty6848 how did you afford to do that?
@@Bomber411 work hard and save up. Then when your over there, there are plenty of seasonal jobs working on farms, fruit picking and construction, but you must get a work visa or a green card equivalent. But you can only stay in each job for 3 months at a time. As long as you get a temporary work visa you’ll find plenty of work, especially in Australia and New Zealand.&
Thanks David
Mine happened around 35-39 when I lost my good job and then fell out of social favor. Lost my only love. A very dark and hard time. I feel alot better and at peace with it now
Thanks David for putting all this into perspective. I’m 54 and a few years ago I got the itch to move back to my home city in the country. I’ve not made it there yet but the itch won’t go away. Blessings to you and your family for this Thanksgiving holiday. Let us truly give thanks to our Creator for the things we often take advantage of. If you have shelter, food and electricity you are wealthy. But if you have grandkids you are blessed and highly favored of The Lord!!!!!
Wow. Thanks Cool Dave i needed that..im 45 and im noticing the changes. If i make it through and get to where you are I'll be great.😊
I'm glad it's not just me. I'm 51 and having a lot of not so good days.
Thank you David.
I always look forward to your videos.
Such a great variety of people and topics.
I just turned 41. I've hit professional goals and am feeling better than ever overall. Happy with where life is
That introduction...heh, I really like this guy. It doesn't hurt that he's done all this excellent work over the years either.
Thank you Chuck. I like your comment.
David Hoffman filmmaker
I feel like I’ve had a few midlife crisis over the last two years. Too much is going on and I made being a mother the center of my identity. Now my kids are older I’m lost lol but I knew this was coming and I’m married to an amazing man. We both have things we want to do and I’ll get over it. Life isn’t over at 40.
I will be 52 in May of 2021 I can tell you without a doubt the last 3 years I have noticed significant changes in my life mostly related to health but also mental changes as well. I just can't remember things like I used to I catch myself all the time talking and forgetting a name sometimes someone I see all the time. I dismiss it to not getting enough sleep that's not always the case. Just don't learn as fast as I used to maybe something is wrong who knows. Things didn't work out like I wished they had lot of that has to do with not setting my goals in life and working to achieve them. Always think be time to do something but that time goes by so fast doors close on that part of your life.
I turn 45 this year. The last couple of years have been dreadful. Some of it's through bad choices, but it genuinely feels as if I'm being deliberately punished by a nefarious force. I'm paranoid, anxious and uncertain about the future.
I moved out of state in 2021, sold home, left adult children and family behind. I turned 47 last year 2022 and been unemployed ever since. I can feel my husband is getting fed up with me, and that hurts even more. Feeling so lonely and so utterly lost in life. Writing this while sitting at the park taking a breather, crying my eyes out. 47 you’re so right about that age, thank you for sharing your experience, it helps to know I’m not going crazy.
Thank you for the kind words, Dan it I’m 46 and looks like it hit me a little early I’ve been feeling lack of motivation and loss of interest and joy of the simple things that used to be fun, on top of that I think I’m burned at work . I honestly don’t know how to get out I’m planning of semi-retire next year hopefully that will work.
At least know I know I’m not the only one going thru this and I hope all you guys find out of this.
You just saved everyone who was so lost trying to understand what was happening - the middle of anything is always the worst place to be -its like winning a silver medal
I think I've been having a mid life crisis my whole life. I'm only 39 but feel the end is near. A person can only handle so much eh... It's exhausting. Love me some David Hoffman though - our light in the dark.🔥🕯️
I am 36. Going through one right now. I prefer to think of it as a transition.
I am so happy I clicked on this thumbnail! Your no-nonsense delivery style, coupled with some data charts, really hit the spot! I am 55 and have always been a happy, optimistic person but this past year I have been questioning 'my whole life' and all the choices I've made up to this point. You hit the nail on the head with the list of symptoms (although mine are thankfully not severe, more in the 'downhearted' category and constant rumination about what's next). Covid hasn't helped any of us navigating 'mid-life' issues, either b/c isolation is literally doctor recommended! You brought tears to my eyes but you made me smile, as well. I know 'this, too, shall pass!' :)
Thank you for your comment. If your resources allow, I would sure appreciate your using the THANKS button under any of my videos including the one you have commented on. It is something new that RUclips is beta testing and would mean a great deal for my continuing efforts.
David Hoffman filmmaker
holy cow. this is good to know. I'm right there in the middle. about 1000 more bad days to go.
But on another note this is so kind for me rn. Im starting a new job and have to do evaluations starting tomorrow. Im a nervous wreck. I have to be my own best friend and be kind to myself. With this new job Im hoping i can have a new start. Wish me luck! Thank you for the kind reminders
Good luck.
David Hoffman filmmaker
Thank you.
I am 51, I have had a crisis every decade, life sucks, however it could be worst, love your material David, thanks, back to my crisis......
Thanks for the advice. Good to see the bird by your side. We need to be as kind to ourselves as we are to others. I also like the advice from the movie Zorba the Greek." You need a little madness". A little madness sometimes helps in a mad world.
I'll be 47 in July. My wife ran off with my best friend, my best buddy dog died, I'm disabled and facing figuring out how to live with my 2 boys on very little income after selling my nice suburban house I've worked so hard for. I'd say this ride might be a wild ride! Even with all of the doom, I somehow feel an excitement about a new future. It seems that when people have nothing to look forward to, they become quite depressed. I can sympathize with my peers.
My sympathies to you. That's a lot to have on your plate. I'm also disabled. Poor but reasonably happy. I have a roof over my head, food to eat, clothing to wear. A decent car to drive. I'm involved in my church, I read the Bible, (helps to understand the world now) pray. It's good that you have your kids to focus on. You will make it through this. I'm been through some tough things. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. It's true that we have to be kind to ourselves. May I make a suggestion... Whatever money that you got from the sale of your house... put it into another house if you can. And take advantage of programs for the disabled and financially handicapped. No shame, friend.
@@marysmith861 * thanks Mary! Best wishes for you, also!
Thx for this much insight in the human state of mind period that I'm experiencing right now. My own thoughts were going back to my puberty years as a teenager. I had to go through that period unknowingly of hormons and how these things seem to work. In fact this period in my life, this mid-life crisis is also a period that I have to go through, with all the symptoms you mentioned. But is good to know , what is happening. There should be more about it in the media, so people know!! Thx for sharing your experience mr. Hoffman!!
You are welcome Phil.
I'm 42. Thank you for the heads up. Better than going in blind. Subscribed.
Thanks for subscribing.
David Hoffman Filmmaker
I am going through it right now, I am 39 and have experienced it for the last 2-3 years. It is horrific. I haven't listened to the video yet, but just reading the blurb helped. For a little more context as I am aware I am a little young to experience it, I have my own business, have been through a lot of adversity, I used to have myself down as bullet proof both mentally and physically - well that is clearly not the case right now! So I will sit and listen to the video....
David Hoffman is the realest
45 years old now last couple years been getting real bad. I’m trying my best. Last two months have been exceptionally hard. I’m not giving up on myself. Thank you for your video.
You always know how to bring joy to any kind of day David. God bless you for all you share with us.
Thank you for your comment. If your resources allow, I would sure appreciate your using the THANKS button under any of my videos including the one you have commented on. It is something new that RUclips is beta testing and would mean a great deal for my continuing efforts.
David Hoffman filmmaker
Thanks for this post and making people aware. It always helps knowing you're not the first or only one.
It’s hard to be kind to yourself, it’s uh uncomfortable. But I’ll take your words to heart David!
I'm so glad I found this video!!!! I've just turned 53 and OMG I've been feeling this way, absolutely lost, still can't shake it now but maybe I can accept it now.
Thank you for such a compassionate video David and stay well ❤️
Christian; Thank you for your comment. If your resources allow, I would sure appreciate your using the THANKS button under any of my videos including the one you have commented on. It is something new that RUclips is beta testing and would mean a great deal for my continuing efforts.
David Hoffman filmmaker
@@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker Of course sir, I would be delighted and also I would be terribly interested in other videos from you. I can genuinely say your video made my day and took a huge weight off my shoulders; again, thank you. Stay well and continue the good work : )
Thank you David for all the fine work you have done and all you will do. You are an inspiration. 💐
G'day David, at 46 in a couple of weeks I am now armed with the facts and awareness is priceless, I'll not be scratching my head wondering what the heck is wrong with me and I have you to thank... I love your work especially this piece hahaha...
Happy Days and God Bless 🙏
Craig aka Digga..
Thank you brother.
🌻David Hoffman always enjoy your videos 🌟Listening from Mass USA🌟Hello everyone on chat 🦋
I'm on the cusp of entering the beginning of that. Thank you for your encouraging and kind words to being kind to ourselves.
Circumstances in my life are forcing a major change in my living situation, but I'm excited and nervous about it.
Interesting, I thought I had a midlife crisis, but did not realize it until 10 years afterward. I remember I felt like I had missed out on something. Especially the expensive sports car. LOL Oh well, I believe I've decided for the most part aged 65 and after is the best.
Thank you so much for this video
You're such a kind sweet man... I'm 64 and my time has been going on for the last 6 year. But I feel a change coming....
I truly want to thank you for reminding me to be kind to myself.
Your words and integrity speak volumes!!! 🙏❤
Thank you for your comment. If your resources allow, I would sure appreciate your using the THANKS button under any of my videos including the one you have commented on. It is something new that RUclips is beta testing and would mean a great deal for my continuing efforts.
David Hoffman filmmaker
Wow a simple search of what I’m feeling in life at the moment and POW here it is. I am 49 years old and have been feeling miserable in life. I have a great wife good kids nothing really to complain about but feel so so shitty! This is the light at the end of the tunnel for me. And to know I’m not alone makes a lot of difference to me. My wife probably hates me right about now. Thanks for the video sir!!
I am sad for you. It sounds like you are depressed. They can do things about that and I have seen them do them for some of my coworkers. I do hope that the daylight comes to you and lightens up the heavy things you feel.
David Hoffman filmmaker
@@DavidHoffmanFilmmaker I will pull through. Thanks
I just turned 46 today & have been going through this crisis for past few years even though I have traveled and done some exciting things. I am planning on moving from Midwest to another part to the county because It may help me come out of my crisis sooner. thank you for this video.
David Hoffman is a GREAT man!
Thank you. I am feeling this very much and am 52. So successful economically but feel so negative about myself and lonely secluded. Life feel sometimes sucks. Not sure what to do. I was in tears in your last few comments. Trying !
It happens to all of us. I’m 50 yr Old and went through much of it in my 40s. The light at the end of the tunnel is as such.. at first the regrets set in. Later, you learn how to manage those feelings of regret and somehow come to an “acceptance” of “this is how things turned out, and it’s meant to be this way”... When things begin to turn around and really get better is when you transition out of the “acceptance” phase and into a phase of “embracement” - where you now have learned to truly “embrace” all that has been given to you or not given to you and you begin to find ways to live a life that uses and make the best of what circumstances were handled to you. I know it sounds cliche but moving into this phase has helped me tremendously. For me, it was being single at 40, never married, no children, etc. I eventually came to the mindset that I was going to wake up every day appreciating my time given to improve myself and make the best body - physically, emotionally and mentally for myself. I also found it helpful for me to volunteer at a senior living facility, and a homeless shelter. You’ll find it helps to take your mind off of your issues by helping others cope with theirs.
David, will you make a video discussing if you've ever desired to venture into making full length movies in Hollywood? Why or why not? Your channel is one of my favorites. Thank you for all your work.
Great talk, David. Be kind to yourself is so important. Have a wonderful Thanksgiving day everyone! Hang in there. We can do it.
Hi David Iam 46 soon to be 47 hope things don't get to much harder, the last 4 yrs have been trying to say the least. I thank you for your insight. I live up in Hope Maine hopefully I can say hello to you some day your videos are gold and you seem like a friendly hearted person God bless my friend!
Thank you Daniel.
David Hoffman filmmaker