Citizen Soldier - If I Surrender (Official Lyric Video)
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- Опубликовано: 26 апр 2021
- There is no agony like holding on when no one knows you’re sick.
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Song produced by Julian Comeau, Mixed/Mastered by Kile Odell
©2021 Citizen Soldier. All Rights Reserved.
#CitizenSoldierBand #IfISurrender #FightTheGoodFight 
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![Citizen Soldier - If I Surrender (1 Hour Version) [Lyrics]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/FooGX3KJano/mqdefault.jpg)
to people who don't understand the lyrics: I'm so happy for you.
To people who understand the lyrics:
I'm so sorry, I also understand it, I hope it'll get better
Thanks for sharing that 💜
I agree and yeah I understand these lyrics honestly the outside world to me is nicer than the world within school where bullies lurk within every corner and feed on those who are sensitive to words but the thing we never realize at the time is that we are never truly alone! There is always someone who will understand how we feel and understand our pain to help us get through it so for those of us who know the lyrics maybe we went through that pain to be a light in someone else's darkest days! There is always a reason for everything we go through so maybe we went through our struggles in order to help others through theirs.
I understand far to well and wish I didn't.... Fuck this song brings me to my knees
@ANDREW CALHOUN at some point, you open your eyes and see the world in a new way. And then you can't get back into the box...Being human it often means becoming one. Other people, it's you, too. We're like bees, connected to each other, but forgot it :)
it won't, but thanks for the thought
Sometimes, NOTHING is really the problem. Sometimes, it's just the EXISTING part that hurts.
True...very true.
@@What-A-Shocker350 Unfortunately. I hope you are okay and it doesn't hurt too too bad. Take care
@@hannahtrevors2651 Thanks, you too.
100% true.
@@hannahjoseph3515 I'm so sorry that existence may be a pain to you right now. I know that you can grow larger than the darkness and you will be alright. Take care
"So sick of hearing, I should stay when I know I would never be missed." That broke me completly 😥😭
If you are struggling please don't hesitate to reach out to those you trst or consider seeing a therapist. You are not alone in this. Life is worth the pain we go through so stay strong. I wish you all the best
Unfortunately the world would be a better place if some of us weren't here including myself
If I can keep fighting so can all of you. I'm 55 and I'm still here.
Sure, my pain would end, but the few people that really love me would inherit it, and I don't want anyone else to feel the way I do. And it would be my fault.
Yep I live in house with my sister's n non talk to me unless I have money
The pain is real, but if it gets that extra please seek help. I do and I find my comfort after the right here with @Citizen Soldier
« When no one seems to care if I exist. There is no agony like being strong when no one knows your sick » hits me hard.
Are you doing ok?
Yh and it relates to me so much is well
@@TK-uz4ts to an extent i am not fully like i want to
me too
The fact that your songs are so scarily relatable is terrifying.
💜
Ikr
definitly agree.
True shit bro
Sometimes I wonder what happened to make these scarily relatible
Citizen soldier is the only artist keeping me alive right now, the songs remind me that I'm not the only one out there feeling this shit. Thank you.
Yep
Yes
You are not alone in your pain. You are a gift to this world. Don't let even the monsters in your head make you forget that. You are the best version of yourself always have been and always will be. Idk who you are internet stranger but just know I love you regardless of the monsters you may be facing. I love you regardless of if you feel worthy, and I love you for being you :) someone is always rooting for you whether you can see them or not.
Train Wreck, James Authur. Check it out.
Agreed . Life is a bitch sometimes!
"There is no Agony like being strong with no one knows you're sick" broke me... my eyes started leaking
I'm not crying, its just that sometimes, when I'm sad, water comes out of my eyes!
@@powerpanda9052 it's okay to cry, all emotions are fine
Hugging you all 🫂
Songs like this are better at educating people on the suffering of others than any psychology book. As someone who's struggled to understand others and at one time believed suicidal people to be weak, I appreciate the work people like you do to show people the truth about this stuff.
I used to think that suicidal people are weak because they give up, but then I found myself in a really dark place and myself had suicidal thoughts, so I changed my mind. Even simply existing with depression and other mental health disorders requires immense strength and sometimes we got to the place when it's just too much and we're too exhausted by this everyday fight with ourselves. The lyrics describe it really accurately.
The lyrics resonate with so many people. The songs really do hit you in the feels even if you're not going through that pain or hardship yourself.
I’m proud of you for learning and changing your view! I appreciate it, and the fact that you were willing to admit you were wrong means a lot. Thank you.❤️/gen /pos
Happy songs make us sad, because they remind us how much better other people have it. Sad songs make us happy, cos they remind us there are others who are like us.
Happy songs make me sad because I want to feel happy
Sad songs make me feel heared but even more sad because I know there are other people who suffer like me as well
Stay strong 🌺
Truth
Goddamn, no wonder I barely have any happy songs in my music folder.
Ancient truth and hidden wisdom come from songs that share a deep and more different perspective
@@dianavandentillaart-kool9335 and that's why i love batte songs! (especially: only survivor - vo williams)
Sending virtual hugs to those who feel like surrendering. Tomorrow is a new day to keep fighting away those demons. You got this
Sending a virtual hug back to you Sarah 💜!
Thanks Sarah
I thank you for the virtual hug we all need to keep fighting our own story
There is no one who you have to fight. 🤔
Pls help
These songs help a lot I'm a 23-year-old who's never had a job because of how bad my depression and anxiety is and these songs show me I'm not alone
If you are struggling please don't hesitate to reach out to those you trust or consider seeing a therapist. You are not alone in this. Life is worth the pain we go through so stay strong. I wish you the best
I'm 20 (as of Thanksgiving the year 2022) and I am battered and broken and though I've had jobs I've held them for less and less time and now I can't get a job and so I'm struggling with everything. It's to the point I'm barely managing to keep my head above water. It's horrible, but I'm hoping it'll get better, as much as I doubt it. Good luck in your lifelong adventure...
(I am seeing multiple mental health professionals to anyone who may come by and recommend therapy. And yes. I have tried transferring to new ones.)
I found this song while looking for I Surrender All by Citizens. Just thought I'd let you know in case you wanted to give that song a listen as well. 😊 💛
Now, lad, it has been a year. You are 24 now! From the bottom of my heart, I hope you are doing better ❤
Can’t say that I’m quite in the situation you are(or at least we’re at the time of writing this), but I feel you there. There are a lot of reasons that I don’t really like to think about what my future will be, but this is one of the worst ones. I get good grades, I take advanced classes, but none of that will matter if I can’t pull myself together enough to seem confident enough to get someone to hire me. I am horrible with people. I’m always nervous about what is the “right” thing to say, and it’s easier with people I know, but for an interview or something… I would be stuttering like mad, pausing to think, and stopping my sentence just to reword something like ten times a minute.
Well, I’m done with my rant now. I just want to end by telling you this: I am not alone, and neither are you. We have each other, and all of the other wonderful people who commented on this video. Thank you for reading.
i had this downloaded in my phone and when i lost my partner it was literally the only song i listened to that gave me a reason to continue on with my life because i knew i wasn't the only one facing this issue..
*"we are suicidal kids/teens/adults telling other kids/teens/adults suicide isn't the answer"*
Thank you #CitizenSoldier for making this song honestly it has made *some* things easier..
stay strong people..
No matter what someone behind the screen understands your problem and cheering you on..
We are strangers but we understand
Citizen Soldier is much more than a band, they are a group of people who write songs about what people would otherwise keep quiet about. Their music helps so many people. I'm thankful for them, and I hope they never stop making works of art #CitizenSoldierArmy
🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤
Yes. I agree. Their songs helped me more than once. :)
Citizen Soldier and NF are musicians who touch and heal souls with their real music! 😔
@@tamarack1pines 100%
@@tamarack1pines indeed
"What's the point of holding on like this when no one seems to care if I exist"
I'm only halfway through the song but I'm already bursting into tears.
Sending love friend 🖤
Hugs! I know the feeling 🥺
New people come into our lives every day and 1 or 2 will make you realise exactly why it was worth holding on its called hope and faith things will become better xxx
❤
I barely made it to the first chorus before I was
I’m almost 13, and I’ve been through slot of abuse through my life, mental and a few times physically. I’ve been struggling with being suicidal for a few years my mom has fully convinced me that I shouldn’t be here so that’s great. But this song I listen to occasionally just to let my emotions out. I don’t do it much but sometimes I just need to. Thank you.
I'm sorry for what you've been through. If you are struggling please don't hesitate to reach out to those you trust or consider seeing a therapist. You are not alone in this. Life is worth the pain we go through so stay strong. I wish you the best
You are going to have a long beautiful life ahead of you. No matter what please remember that you are loved by so many people, though you may never see us face to face.
I hope you're doing ok. It's very relatable, because the first time I was suicidal was when I was 11, and now as an adult, things doesn't seem much better. Nevertheless, just want to let you know that you are not alone, something I wished I had heard from someone when I was your age.
Hope you are doing better.
Are you still there¿??.... Don't be defeated by the world.... Carry on.. you will find the treasure you seek ... .. .. . . Search for your purpose. People hurt you but it's the people that can cure you as well. Find them. Or they will come to you on their own. Just hang on .
I'm a survivor, for all those who feel low just know you are much more stronger then you realize and you have a whole family backing you up no matter if their physically with you or over the internet stay strong! 🙏🕊️
When you feel alone and broken, remember, there are people like those that make up Citizen Soldier, who understand how you feel and speak up about it like this. You aren't alone.
💜
This!
Yet we still feel so alone. 😢 But it's life right?
@@michelleedgeman9683 You've got you, and that is what matters. Stay strong.
@@user-ng3bg7qw2d Thank you! I'm trying 💕
When everyone is depressed but you just like the song.
💜
Your right about the song being nice.
@@user-zj1wd8ty5r its far from being nice its an explanation of a feeling that no one understands but you no one can see how it would be to be in that position its not just a nice tune
@@iyen-Bunny4792 Technicaly this is not true. People with high empathy (or empaths) can in fact understand feelings and positions they have never been in. Some people have this ability, but it's hard for somebody that is not an empath or with a strong sense of empathy to understand or relate that this is possible. It is true for most people that only experience makes you understand. But it just isn't true for all people alive. Some people can and do see/understand what something can/does feel like in a certain position of mindset. To a point that some empaths have committed suicide because of troubles not even their own but the pain and stress they feel is just as real. So yeah..just throwing that out there. Empaths and people with strong empathy can see and understand these things. Even withoud having lived it. It's really sad people still seem unaware or uncaring or unbelieving of the emotional range and emotional intelligence some people posses in this world. And how thats not being dramatic or attention calling or lying or being a ''senstive (like thats a bad thing) snowflake.
@@amberanime actually no one in this world can truly understand another person bc everyone experiences and deals with pain differently and even with empathy u get an idea of the feeling end of story even to people who have experience the same scenario can’t understand one another they can relate yea but again pain works differently for everyone
I know I’m late to the comments, but I just want to tell anyone out there who’s struggling that you are not alone. I scrolled through many of the comments and nearly every single one was from a person who lives this song every day. I’m no exception; a little over a year ago I tried to throw it all away because I couldn’t see a future I wanted to live in. I thought that ending it would set me free, but it’s not that black and white. My sister saved my life, and my friends proved that they cared that I existed. So I’m repeating what I learned now, so that anyone who needs to see it knows.
You are not alone.
You are not broken.
You are loved. And if anyone in your life is fool enough to tell you that you’re not, then they’re wrong. You are deserving of love.
Your feelings are not a burden.
You are not worthless.
You deserve to live. Not just survive, but to LIVE. To enjoy life; to feel the wind on your face, to mean something to others and to yourself.
All is not lost.
If anyone has read this far and needs advice, resources, or just someone to listen to them, please please please comment and I’ll be more than happy to help. If you need a place to move to, I can help you find some options or at least provide the resources for you to find someplace.
I know it’s hard. It’s honestly fucking awful. And every day will be hard, until one day it isn’t quite as bad. And until that day comes, remember that there are 6,000 people who’ve commented on this video that feel the same way as you do, people who truly understand how hard it is to speak up about your pain and want to help you. If nothing else, we’re all here for you. Because we will never allow someone else to suffer silently as we have. Please, reach out. Sorry to rant on, but this is so important and if you needed to see this today then I really hope it helped and that things get better for you. 💜 ;
Hearing this after overcoming depression for years really hits different. It brings back the memory, the breakdowns, the madness. Some people won't understand how it felt, because they never experienced the feeling of not having any choice but to endure and this pushes you to the edge where you don't have any choice but to end everything. But something inside my heart, the little hope of being saved by someone is always there. Fighting while waiting for that moment where I can say that I'm finally free. Monstrous mind can really kill. But your kind words and action can make difference.
It's 12:59 am but a new Citizen Soldier song is more important
Haha thanks! 💜
Indeed
@@CitizenSoldier I was just scrolling through Spotify and I got a notification and when I saw it said Citizen Soldier I clicked immediately
Here in Cuba is 1:11 am. I feel the same.
@@reyluisrodriguez6758 Same hour than you, but I am in Canada.
I once surrenderd and kicked the chair out under myself,my best friend who i had a fight with over a girl came to my house and saw me through the window hanging,he broke my door down and saved my life and then he just grabed me and gave me the biggest hug ever and said to me you matter,i broke into tears and for 7 years now we are stil best friends
Hold on to your friend because he is a true friend 😉
I'm glad you are still here
i am glad you still here
@T H well if it helps in a way,i wil tell you that you matter aswell and i belive in you and your dream to be successful one day
@T H you are just as important as anyone else
If I could I would reach you a hand and say you are not alone, let me help carry your weight and make it a little bit lighter for you
I hope you will be succesfull in good things in life, but I hope you don't succeed in taking your own life because you are important
Stay strong, share some of your hurt, there will always be someone who hears your cries 🖤
“So sick of hearing I should stay when I know I would never be missed” why is this verse so relatable ?😭
If you are struggling don't hesitate to reach out to those you trust or consider seeing a therapist. You are not alone in this. I wish you all the best
"If you could see under my skin, You'd realize why I hold it in. Why it's a fight I don't wanna win." Those lyrics cut deep.....
That last verse hit me hard. Even the times when I was in crisis, asking for help, I was dismissed, ridiculed, and treated like a joke (even by therapists). It's hard when it seems like the only time anyone takes things seriously is when you become "the dying proof." I keep fighting, but "I just wanna lose."
Don't give up! Your Life Is long, you Will never know what will happen in the future! Don't listen to the people that don't help you when you are in a diffucult situation, listen to Who love you and if there Is nobody, you must go out and know other people, there will be in the world sobebody that can support you!
P.s. don't look at the grammar, i don't know english very well
I am always here for you
Hello I just wanna remind you you are valid and that no one has to always be OK sad backwards is das and das is good its very natural to cry for we are human hope you had a great day
thank you for not surrendering.
No don't give up.
Things have to get better
To whomever reads this
You’re here for a reason, in both ways:
-You were curious for this song because of the title or because of the artist
-You’re still here because you deserve to live and be heard, this is a comment section where everyone feels you, so you just go ahead and feel you.
They’ll be there, we’ll be here
Yo, that's some real sh*t right there, and I appreciate you because too many people don't care anymore and can't be bothered to offer their hand to someone whose drowning.
Thank you.
thank you, William, I appreciate it, and more importantly, I appreciate you
I wish
@@sadboyofficial30e I'm here and I care. Some days I feel just like you. But I know good people are still out there. I just haven't appreciated that when I should have. I hope those people will forgive me one day. Until then, I carry on. Stay strong. You've got this.
The fact that these songs hit on the nose exactly how my depression hits. And there are thousands of you here too shows proof we aren't alone, do not let anyone invalidate you. I've finally made steps to cut these people off because they are not a part of my healing.
We all have our stories, some similar some not so similar but don't let another person's pain make you look down on yours. Because together you can help each other put it behind you. Hugs to all
Mental illness is horrible but fighting the demons and a daily takes its toll for sure. Your music hits so close to home. Thank you for putting it into words.
Do they like NOT have a great, amazing, talented song? They don't? Well of course they don't because they are great🖤
Thanks so much Kathryn 💜
Ikr
Thats so true! I love all songs from them 😁
“What’s the point of holding onto this?”
Because it will get better, I swear to you. You’ll get through.
Well said 💜
Heh, if you think about it.. There are so many people that are suffering and yet can only be understood because of the pain others as well have gone through. Banding together is the only way to survive, but as hard as it is to find others.. It's worth a try.
Often, my inner demons like to drag me into the Depths of my own sanity. Its like mentally drowning, but they keep giving you air to survive. Deeper and deeper I go, and the pressure keeps getter more intense. I don't know if I've hit rock bottom, but I'm slowly climbing out of this.
Normally, I'd agree, except I've been going through it for 10 years now. And everyday is only worse than the previous.
amen,besides no sailor was ever made by sailing through calm waters.
All the songs of Citizen Soldier are rich, rich in emotions. But this one... This one is extremely powerful. The music of the chorus and the lyrics are magnificent, powerful, and show the distress of an existence. It is in listening to Citizen Soldier that I reflect every day on the meaning of life. Of this fight. I have a thought for depressed people who "can’t take living with what’s in their head".
I am sending you strength, hope and love. Those who rarely feel pain will never know what it’s like to experience it all the time
If you have listened to this music, it is because you are survivors!
Just realised it has been just over a year and I'm still here. Last night I saved my best friend and now I'm revisiting this song. Thank you for this song. This will always hold a spot because I would have heard it if I had been successful 🖤
"There is no agony like being strong when no one knows you're sick"
That is one powerful, relatable lyric
💜
That lyric hit me hard
This is the type of music people gotta listen the lyrical music is fading I love seeing people fighting for it instead of doing mumble rap lyrical music is coming back and I’m glad to see that
Thanks! 💜
I completely agree with what your saying
@@CitizenSoldier np love the new song my favorite one gotta be if I surrender or I’m not okay
@@braxtonantkowiak6401 I don’t wanna hear about people flexing on me with their Gucci money and girls just want the song to be from the heart and this band NF etc are the people that know what we want
@@strugglewolf exactly
"So sick of hearing I should stay when I know I would never be... Missed..."
God damn... This line hits the hardest.
I know no one asked or probably cares but here we go
When I was in 2nd grade someone who helped me and I loved so much left me. My best friend though that he had to take his life to let go of all his pain. I felt, and still do, like it's my fault he did it. I couldn't save him when he saved me from the kids that would hurt me everyday. I felt this large hole inside of myself and it only got bigger. I came out to my family and they didn't, don't, accept me. I put on a huge smile but when I'm alone I break and cry every time. I cause pain onto myself so I can maybe handle what pain comes to me. It works sometimes but it just makes my want to join my friend even stronger every time. I'm scared of living but too scared to die but it hurts so much too keep living. But soon I found friends who love me for me and help me on my bad and worse days. I met them thanks to one of Citizen's Soldier's songs. I know that they give me a reason to keep living and their my new family.
And ladies and gentlemen, we have finally found the most amazing and relatable music creators.
💜
Very true!
YESSSSS
Its terrifying but yes🥺
I am suicidal and suffer from depression and I have to say this song is nothing but amazing.
Much love to you Riza 💜
@Nurain Nabilah Nazri Keep fighting, you're not alone.
Yeah.. Me too, I suffer from a lot of fake friends and not loyal friend even my best friend gone and he doesnt care about me anymore.
May God heal your heart and give you the strength to keep fighting ... I know it feels like hell .. but you are all too special to die ...
You are sensitive fragile souls, angelic and full of emotions and perfection seekers ..
And you are true warriors to bear all this .. you are a living proof of patience and strength ..
Love yourselves because you are worthy of all love ♥️
You are Loved❤️. We'll get this through. Much Love.
Sending kisses, hugs, love and support to everyone who feels like surrendering. Every new day is worth fighting away those inner monsters. You got this! ❤
Music tends to find me in the times it's needed. 💔
“If you could see all my abuse and spend a day inside my shoes, you’d realize why I wanna lose”
Mom, dad, I’m not craving attention. I’m barely hanging on and I know you think mental health isn’t real. But the nights crying myself to sleep, the endless headaches, the friends I lost by pushing them away, the loneliness, this sick feeling I can’t see the end of it otherwise than ending it... It is real. And I need you to believe for me. Just this once.
We know how it feels Laura 💜
Been there. It’s not always that damn phone. Stay strong, @Laura.
It gets better. I didn't think I would make it. It took a long time but it did get better
stay strong and i you wish all best in life and hope things get better for you in life
I believe you and know what you are going through I'm there myself but Jesus Christ is the Love we all are in a search for.or the reason for the emptiness in our lives.prayers for you and your family in every situation your facing in life. You will overcome by the blood of Jesus amen
"There is no agony like being strong when no one knows you're sick"
How does Citizen Soldier always perfectly describe the feelings that I can't put into words??
Here for you 🖤🖤🖤
Exactly, that's what I'm saying
Ruth, that's what I want to know too
You nailed it, in plain English.
I love the fact that this man's music is based around mental health. I love it all
3rd song of theirs that I have listened to. I started crying. No one ever understands but this song just told said everything I ever wanted to say. I'm 17 and haven't cried in 4 years. Thank you for making music like this.
Im 17 too, and im lying all alone rn trying not to cry, 'cause of the parents behind the door of my room
When we're young we cry so loud that everyone can hear us. But when we're order we cry in silence to not enable anyone hear us😭🤐
Citizen Soldier and their 2:00 AM bangers dude
Match made in heaven
Glad to hear that 💜
“Will anyone believe the hell of being me” is the lyric that hits home for me bc it’s hard to believe that me, a person who pretends to be happy, is struggling mentally.
Hey your just like me. I pretend to be happy at school, but I’m actually struggle with severe depression and am starting to have more suicidal thoughts.
@@alexbroadway29 Same here 😔
@Angela I know don’t you hate it! And then people end up making you feel guilty for feeling so bad even though you don’t even really know why you feel this way and you don’t even want to!
I hear you. Every time I try to say how I feel I just get shut down. At this point I don’t even bother.
@@Cheetahgirl_Studios listen we’re all exactly in the same boat. So I am proposing a free invitation for anyone who is depressed or just having emotional problems to come talk to me. People say I’m very good with emotions I’m also very calm, kind and none-judgmental so anyone can come talk to me if you feel like no one else will listen to you because I 100% will!😊😊❤️💜💖💙💛🤍
I've been listening to your songs for a month now and you really do cheer me up and make me feel better and show me I'm not alone. I live in a toxic family of neglect and selfishness that very much ignores my existence unless they want something. I suffer from many mental and physical disabilities, that most likely come from trauma and ignorance. I can't do things on my own very easily, I have to ask for things to be done for me. My family neglects these things and I am also incapable of living alone, so I'm stuck in this cycle. I deal with very deep dark thoughts and suicidal thoughts. But you so far have kept me in a bright mood and always calmed any mental breakdowns I have and I want to thank you for that! I am learning to sing myself, many musicians I listened to inspired me but due to singing badly and no second opinion from anyone besides my family, which says I sing really bad, I lost motivation, but listening to you sing motivated me to keep on going with it. Again I want to thank you, my life will probs be like this for ages in this toxic life, but at least I know it's much more brighter because of you. Thank you once again
Sorry to hear that. Stay strong, life is worth the pain we go through. I recommend reading the books "Mans search for meaning" as well as the "Power of now". They did more for me than anything else could
This sound is so wonderful. The person who is reading this comment, I wish you great success, health, love and happiness!
The thing I love about Citizen Soldier the most is how well they manage to put our deepest, most hurtful thoughts and emotions into songs we can still enjoy
💜
*"There is no agony like being strong when no one knows you're sick"*
That hits me everytime, I hear this emotional voice
Timestamp is 1:33
It’s a special kind of hell when you get so good at pretending everything is fine when nothing is, but you just can’t deal with it right now.
@@jamesharding3459 IKR? 😭😭😭
I had lost my wife and children because of my actions, those said actions were caused by grief after losing someone that i never got to reconcile with. Citizen Soldier has help me with there songs to move past this sadness and better myself. there are still demons laying in the shadows, but i feel i can move forward because of what these songs made me think of, Thank You!
Stay strong, all the best to you
Sometimes I want to surrender, but I know that would be a selfish wish for my parents and friends. I am trying to push forward but it gets harder and harder to do so to the point of a near breakdown. Thanks for this song, it helps me with expressing the maelstrom in me.
This is for the ones who need this.
My dearest friend, my sweetest love, my once never ending story, my darling stranger, i have something to tell you.
You are loved more than you could ever know, if not be the people around then by me.
You are so special in every single way, such a beautiful person, on the outside and in spirit, i thank you for being you and being here.
Even if the darkness rises to the point you can’t help yourself by wishing you could give up but please don’t!
I love you, i need you and i miss you!
Never give up so i can hold you again, even if it’s just once.
So wipe your tears and let those beautiful eyes shine again, you deserve it.
Untill we meet my dearest friend, my sweetest love, my once never ending story, my darling stranger.
Thank you. Just thank you.
😭
Hug me now. You've convinced me
"Let me fall, let me break."
Thanks but no thanks :)
oh god. that was unexpectedly deep, and hit close to home. well done, citizen soldier; i’m gonna go cry now with this on repeat.
They have this caring feeling for their fans so they write songs to help us know that we aren't alone in this fight.
Happy to hear that 💜
@@CitizenSoldier thank you for being our voice ;
@@CitizenSoldier Thank you for being our voice...your song really helped other ppl and me so...tHaNk YoU!
I love how this band sings about mental struggles rather than anything else
Something that we need more of.
Man i be surviving for years and only found out about you guys last year. i now have a community i belong ❤
These guys need a award or something for best music of 2021.
Seriously it's so underrated it fking hurts.
Appreciate you so much 🖤
2023 and still true words
Brb gonna go cry. I'm bawling. I feel undeserving of all the support I receive from my family because I know someone always has it worse and I always feel guilty for what I have, because I feel I don't have it as bad as others. I always feel like a fake, a burden. These songs help me understand myself and my thoughts better. Everyone out there, remember your meds. Drink water, and stay safe.
Much love to you 💜
Just because there may be someone who has more pain doesn't mean yours are less. Be proud of yourself for keep going
@@CitizenSoldier thank you 💕
@@thuychung8411 thank you for your kind words, they really mean a lot. Have a great day. 🌻
I feel the same way but it’s better to admit what’s hurting you than to let it consume you and turn into something worse
Why do these songs have to resonate so hard for me
I have been around a long time heard so much music but never such a real language that speaks to the hearts of so many damaged people, emotions are what we are no-one becomes a better version of themselves by denying how deep we feel.
If you are struggling please don't hesitate to reach out to those you trust or consider seeing a therapist. You are not alone in this. Life is worth the pain we go through so stay strong. I wish you the best
Even if you don't think anybody cares I know there are people like me who still cares about all of you out there! ❤️✨ Thank you all for being here you're all amazing! ^^
Thank you friend! Appreciate you 🖤
@@CitizenSoldier No problem! I also appreciate you, your music is very helpful to many of us!
Your right there faith their music has helped me so much
This song speaks to me ive been feeling this for 4 days counting today
My husband died by suicide 11/09/2020 and I've been struggling to forgive him. Thank you for this song, even as painful as it is. I love you Nic Shelton. I always will.
Hey I just read your post by chance I love this band they are so relatable its unreal. I didn't loose someone to suicide but I have been where you are ina different story. I feel your pain as I read. I'm so sorry from your loss...your are not alone by your pain or your thoughts. There is always someone who would listen . I don't know you but you can talk to me I'd you ever need . I feel alone all the time my world is crumbling everyday and I struggle to find hope to see how can I get through this. I'm a woman who feels ...lost. completely n utterly hopeless. Never give up someone always cares
Your a strong woman. Soon, you’ll meet your husband in heaven! 😇
I'm so sorry for your loss...I wish I could have saved your husband despite never knowing him I love writing poetry and it tends to be darker poetry whether it's inspired by a song or something that's deep inside as I tend to find it hard telling someone face to face about how I feel. Especially when my dad says that it's because I don't pray enough or I don't trust God enough or I don't read the bible enough not to mention a "friend" told me I was choosing to have depression and I need to snap out of it. Poetry and writing is the only place I can go to tell how I'm feeling and I have my poems on my blog, my quotev and wattpad accounts. People have told me they have felt the same pain of it. That it touched them deeply. I wish my poems could have reached him. Again I'm so sorry for your loss and I wish I could give you a hug.
@@ARC-0606 VIRTUAL HUGG! ༼ つ ◕◡◕ ༽つ
You should never do anything without knowing the possible outcomes
Surrendering to the “monsters inside” will not fix the hurt. True peace comes when we surrender our everything to God. It is only then that we can experience healing.
Their songs hit different. Sometimes we dont know whats wrong. but something makes us feel this way. Known or not. Keep fighting everyone, you will get friends eventually if you dont rn.
Simple...
I see Citizen Soldier
I click
Agreed👍
Haha thanks for the support 💜
Oh absolutely!!
Same
Love them
"Will anyone believe the hell of being me before I decide to be the dying proof."
That hits hard.
Yes it does. You can live without living and die without dying that's it ...
Its true. I ask myself that question every day
This line perfectly describes my inner thoughts. I'm deciding to commit suicide to give proof to society of the demotivation society throws at us.
definitely I know it's horrible horrible but sometimes I've wanted to prove it do you believe how sick I am now 😞
how are you doing? has things gotten better at all 💙 hope you're doing okay and still here fighting I am but I'm tired 😞
It does and unfortunately I’m having thoughts of becoming that dying proof…
With each passing day, with each song I listen to, I become more and more a fan of this magnificent band. Thank you just for existing
I have spent my life seeking music with meaning. Songs I can relate to. I never thought I'd hear these words in a song. I never thought I'd hear Anyone understand my life. I'm actually crying from this. It's literally my life in a song. I just want to be more than a shadow in the background. This song means so much to me now. Thank you
I know that no one asked for this, but here goes.
When I was a young teen, I started to feel like I was nothing but a disappointment to my parents. I was so convinced that what I felt was true, that I decided to drive a steak knife through my heart. But, before I could do what I felt had to be done, I had what I can only describe as a vision of my parents finding me after I had gone. I stopped and told them how I was feeling and what I had almost done; they were devastated. After that day, I swore to hold on for them, and to never let them see me like that again. And here I am, nearly a decade later, feeling the weight of my oath every single day; wanting nothing more than to surrender.
Thank you, Citizen Soldier for giving a voice to my pain, and the pain of so many others.
Send you a Hug... ❤️(っ.❛ ᴗ ❛.)っ..
@@lill_sweets3271 Thank you.
@@Lupus_119 Your Welcome...❤️
@Gemmariah Beadle you're not wrong to feel that way.. but please don't do something like that sweetheart.. hang in there, and don't listen to the mean Evil voices ok? You are not worthless! You are an amazing beautiful person! Who has so much potential! I Know that you'll be Amazing more than you already are❤️😊
I'm so sorry.. plz Know that you are a very wonderful amazing person! I'm sorry that the pain you're feeling... I'm sending you a virtual Hug 😊 hand in there it'll get better ok? ❤️😊
I'm glad this song came out, at the right time. Im not anxious anymore. Wish me luck tommorow! ✌ And never give up
Good luck tomorrow! you got this 💜
Good luck!! Sending prayers 🙏😊
Good luck!
good luck 🍀
Having one of those nights. Weeks really, but your music helps. It's a comfort I can depend on. Helps me feel less alone
If every day is a struggle just remember even if you dont notice there is always someone there for you. Just reach out and grab a lifeline. Sending hugs and love to whoever needs it ❤✌️
Thanku❤
Idk how RUclips does it..... Last night, I was in a really bad place. I broke down and was looking for a way out. This came on my recommended this morning. to anyone who needs to hear it, I love you. You are worth saving. You have made it through 100% of your worst days and you are not alone. Things will get better
That's God he knows what we need
I think God did it buddy, I was going through the same thing, and then I chose to live just like you even though it was hard, I was feeling so unloved, and The next day as I was going about my day someone I thought I knew added me on snapchat, I added him back. And right now that’s a reminder that God has my plans, He has yours too, and to me it sounds like this song was part of it, nothing is impossible for God and that includes even random things, Sorry for preaching this was the only way I knew how to respond
@@myagirl1997 Don’t apologize God has saved me countless times from turning off the lights and it’s encouraging to read comments like yours
ruclips.net/video/BPHQWzIA0no/видео.html
Thank you ❤️
,,just let me die” as a person that was suffering from depression until now that one hits really hard. Thank you for being voice for all of us❤️ Your songs always feel like they say what I could never describe with words. So thank you again. Stay safe everyone
You too friend 🖤
It's so good to hear this song and realizing you once related to that and now you can hear it with a smile knowing it's behind you , a little reminder of how strong you are. I wish i knew this song when back then .
I just want to say that having “You’re not praying enough.” in the speech bubble is so good. My family’s religion has only been a point of making me feel not enough so I’m so happy to see that other people have felt the same.
I take you mean praying not paying. though for sure money related problems play a huge part in suicide as well. Not only selfesteem issues. Some people feel good about themselves, but dont have the means to thrive in a competitive money focused world and they opt out because living is just to expensive or being forced into working is whats causing the depression, not your thoughts about yourself. The amount of people I know who feel their quality of life would improve if they could LIVE their lifes instead of being forced to go to their jobs 5 days a week is really telling. And the amount of people who feel trapped in a system they feel is sick or doesnt work and thats what pushed them to suicide attempts or thoughts.. like no amount of ''your amazing and worth it'' pep talks are going to help here because this group is already aware of that. Their problem is with how the world works, not themselves. This side of suicide gets ignored to often and almost always put on the person instead of the system. Like the person was Ill or needed help. No this person needed a healthy working world. The system kills people as much if not more then mental disorders do. Add to that that most self esteem issues are ALSO because of the system.. and well.. time to change the system instead of tackling the problem on an individual bases. Unless the system changes, suicide will not only stay, the numbers will keep on growing. Praying and theraphy will both fail. They do already. The problem is bigger then anything that can be resolved with talking to somebody.
@@amberanime you’re right. Whoops. It’s praying now.
Been told that many times. Or compared to other people who have it worse yet they’re thriving. I don’t care about those other people, they aren’t me!
I broke at 'when no one knows you're sick'. At my worst point all my friends thought I was fine...
It's sad how easily a mask can be faked though. If you've been down the road long enough the easier it becomes.
🖤🖤🖤
I've fought my monsters for 43 years, I surrendered once, it did not set me free, it took me lower than i could ever imagine. For everyone out there fighting, never give up, you are not alone. However lonely it may feel, there is always someone who loves you. Virtual hugs to you all. Life is good, let's do this ❤
In my past, I was always a volcano ready to explode on any little thing that triggered the rage I had bottled up for 7 years from 8-15 when I was child abused by my birth mom and her boyfriend that I was scared of letting it go cause I felt that if I let it go, who was I? I felt that I would've been nothing but a burden...until one night Jesus Christ saved me and told me to let it go, he said I'm here for you and I will bear your hurts, your pain, and your rage and hate just let it go. And since then it has been 9 years since then and when I hear songs like this, it makes me appreciate how precious life is, and how we loose sight that every human being has a purpose here on earth as the children of God who made us in his own image that we are born to make a life here on earth that He has graciously giving us that we are to bring glory to him and his name by our choices in life. Glory to God Almighty. Hallelujah x10.
A wise man once said:
It's better to survive the pain than to give into the hate and pain because if you do then you will lose all that you gained and will gain
That is debatable
What’s the point in surviving the pain, when you’re just gonna lose anyway, regardless of how much you’ve gain. We’re all bound to die and lose eventually, so there really isn’t any point anymore
The point of surviving the pian is the not about avoiding the inevitable end but the live to see those who will care the next day
Bro If you're gonna name yourself after an anime character at least make that character your profile picture.
@@clarkebooth905 yeah but that's just cool with a combo
If you are reading this your are valid and you are loved. Your not alone in your fight. Dont give up!
I am alone
Thank you, this comment is helpful. This support is what people need, and you're giving it. Thank you
These songs absolutely touch my heart mind and soul in a way that music never has. truly beautiful music 👏🏻
This is the one song I can listen to on loop for hours and enjoy every second of it.
"Let me die cuz I cant take what's living in my head"
Felt that man.
Same…
Same
Same
Same here
One of the reasons I'm s*icidal right there. The first one being, "No one would care if I was gone." The second one being, "I want to end my suffering."
This song is making me cry because everything I have bottled up in the past weeks is being said through the song. I cant stop the tears. I just wished my family saw the real me and don't judge me for being sick. Also, I love, love the song. 💜
Sending love 🖤
Jesus sees you & loves you the way you are but he can heal you if you ask & believe!
Don't worry you can make it through this no matter what happens you can always over come the hardships in life. No matter what people may say there are always those who love you and care for you, keep going strong and never give up as I know you can make it through anything
Sending love to all who see this. You are loved! Hold on! You've got this!!!!!
You guys tell how some many feel. The constant words within your music is a burden invisible and not wanted. We all feel this but your music helps us see it's not just us and we aren't alone. Thank you
I’m praying for you and everyone who listens to this song. I’m not really one to talk, but your life will get better and people care for you. You are important to someone out there, even if they live halfway across the world. You matter. Don’t give up.
💜
I’m sorry but I read the end part as you don’t matter. Give up 😭✋ but Thankyou for your words, I hope you are doing well too!
@@tired.5123 Of course! Thank you 😊, you too!
When ever I’m close to giving up I come back to this song, my darkest days never seem to go away no matter what I do and sick of being told just get over it or I’m putting it on for attention, to anyone out there that is struggling as well your not alone although the world might not understand your amazing and there are those of us that see your bright shining light keep your chin up I love you all x
This is the only artist that sings what i cant express and put into words. I hope they keep devoloping and writing amazing songs like this 🖤🖤🖤
I wish I could show someone this song without them asking if I'm okay
Well, if you're not you can always just send "I'm not okay"
I know, I feel like that with a lot of the music I listen to as well ☺
💜
I think the scariest part about depression. Especially clinical depression. Is that its scarier when you don't have a reason to be feeling down. A lot of times its some sort of external force that may be able to be combatted. But when its a chemical imbalance. It's terrifying when you physically can not explain why you wanna do harm to yourself.
So true. I have a thyroid condition, and everyone who has thyroid issues knows just how much it ban mess you up mentally if your numbers are off. Just recently, my hormones were so imbalanced that I was basically texting the crisis textline every other day and legitimately thought I was gonna die before the medication change kicked in because I was so suicidal. When you have a chemical imbalance, you don't even need a reason to be depressed. It's all your body messing with your brain and telling you to be sad when really you shouldn't be.
Or the times you may not want to harm yourself but just cease existing. Just that you have no drive for anything. Even the things that you normally find fun and enjoy now just leave you feeling numb.
@@marcuswanha9723 So true. I know that feeling way too well.
My brother and I both grew up in an abusive home and we had the monsters in us. But we fought it and got better. He was living a good life, always fought the voices to end it all. He struggled his whole life with one thing after another and yet he still provided for his family and loved his children more than our father ever loved us. A tragic motorcycle accident that was deemed no one was at fault, he was probably tired and didn't see the turn signal and even at speed limit couldn't stop in time when he realized they were turning. An accident took him from us. But not the monster he fought his whole life to keep at bay
And here I am, after two years. I managed to defeat all the demons, to win the most important battle, the battle for life. For all those who are still fighting, I am sending you all the strength and love in the world ❤
This might just be my new favorite Citizen Soldier song
Same
Whoa! Glad to hear that 💜
Yea I have heard this the first time and it was already well on its way to the top. I have now listened to it probably 10 times in the last 3 hours and I have to say its at the top, the way they have done this song was so perfect
Once again Citizen Soldie made a song everyone needs to hear❤
Thanks 💜
Literally every song by these guys is a lyrical embodiment of depression and being someone who occasionally goes through it I couldn't love these guys more
I don't know who needs to hear this but Psalm 91 says,even if everything around you gets destroyed,even when life itself seems hopeless and all for not,you'll keep standing, for Jesus died for us carrying and already having payed for are sins,with his own flesh and blood you'll make it 🙏🏾
beautiful song. I have a new friend who I realized was suicidal so ive been as supportive as possible and its taken a while but he's finally said he's feeling a lot better. I'm not the only reason he's okay but I refused to sit back and see him stuck in that darkness and not do anything. I'm so happy he's doing even a little better.
Glad to hear he’s doing better. Appreciate you Evelyn 💜
Your lucky you still have your friend, I recently figured out my friend committed suicide which hurt so much. make sure you don’t let go of your friends.
It’s like he took a walk in my shoes this song expresses exactly how I feel
Much love to you William 💜