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DROPPING OUT OF UNIVERSITY?? | Mental Illness
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- Опубликовано: 22 окт 2019
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"I don't want to die, I want to live easier" man that hit so hard
Right?
Lol ikr?
Fuck hits the nail on the head
I don’t want to die, I want to live easier. Every time depression hits I have to remind myself of this🙃
this is so me X
That's a great way of putting it.
Thank you for this
Amazing mantra! I will remember this when times are tough 🙏🏻
This is so important
I am 72 and autistic and I have dropped out of 5 universities. But I have also graduated 4 times, so I have mixed feelings about the my journey. I just wanted to let you know that you can do whatever you like when the time seems right. Thanks for the great content; I wish you well. .
Wow that sounds like quite the journey, was it to do with the subjects or the environment? I am at university now and had to drop a subject, and I know for a fact if I were only studying that subject I would have had to drop out
@@Maria-up2yv 😔
I needed to hear this. That's very inspiring.
Wow congratulations 🙂
That's amazing! Having 4 degrees sounds really cool, and hearing that dropping out or not doing things on "time" is ok is very comforting
It's so hard when you know you can do it academically but emotionally you can't.
It makes me feel less guilty I didn't finish my masters degree because I was in a really bad place emotionally and I don't think I could have finished the course let alone handled the career I was going into (teaching)
Your videos are great.
Hey it sounds like I’m in a similar place right now as you were! How are you now? I’m struggling so much with making the decision to leave
I just dropped out of a masters after the first week. I just knew it wasn’t right for me and my mental health had declined so quickly. I was also diagnosed with ASD literally 2 weeks before starting the course… so yeah now I’m having therapy and taking care of myself! From my experience in the UK, I didn’t find the course to be suitable for me as an autistic person. It was all seminar based, so discussions, debates and giving presentations. No thank you!!! I’d have to waste all of my energy trying to survive in that environment instead of being able to focus on actually learning! X
When she said not studying or doing school makes her feel guilty and like a failure, I almost cried. That is so me!!!!
😢💔
Right but when u have to do it it's also hard and often u don't know how to be balanced and focus on everything at the same time
Me too!!!! :)
Same. Especially on days when I have no motivation.
I mean...if you can't do the work then you are indeed failing to complete the course. If you are struggling to motivate yourself to complete the work then you should re-evaluate your goals and whether or not what you are trying to accomplish is the right choice. I recently changed my courses to political science from biochemistry because I was finding that calculus is infuriating and it consumes so much of my time that I am left with little time to complete work for other courses, and little motivation. I also take time to look at other options outside the sphere of jobs that require higher education. I understand that it's technically not the fault of our generation that we are so hung up on the idea that college=success, but at the same time we are one of the least introspective generations, we lack basic critical thinking skills, and are looking to be spoon fed information that doesn't need to be correct it just needs to feel right.
I fear failure just as much if not more than the next person, but I know that it's part of life and it's how we grow as people. Don't be discouraged if university doesn't feel right, look into trades and think about what you can offer that people might find valuable.
I’m going to tell you something I wish someone told me when I took time off “I’m proud of you for dropping out and listening to your body ❤️”
I know this comment wasn't for me but thank you so much it was so hard to make the decision and everyone making me feel like shit and a failure. Thank you kind stranger for making me feel validated just crying from feeling heard at last. Thank you
It’s for anyone who needs to hear it ❤️ I’m glad I helped you feel validated ❤️ sending you love and light
Same
I think it’s wonderful you’re speaking about this! I work at a university and It’s amazing how we say eating bad, not sleeping, and just generally not taking care of our bodies is part of the “college experience.” It shouldn’t be! Proud of you for doing what’s right for you.
What a powerful post, normalizing that people shouldn’t feel like they need to go to school especially over their mental health. Thanks for sharing!! ❤️
Exactly.
I agree,mental health is more important.My granddaughter is autistic and struggles with school.When she’s on school holidays she is so much better than when she is at school😔
I agree coming from a person who had apathy through school.
I ended up taking 7 years to finish my 3 year degree.. I changed my major 3 times, switched universities, dropped out of several classes because of anxiety. I also only attended the bare minimum classes because being at uni gave me severe anxiety. I was finally able to finish only once I switched to 100% online classes. It was such a relief to finish but honestly I don't think it was worth the amount of stress it put me through.. I only finished because I felt obligated and like I was too "smart" to fail.
About to do the same, 7 years (in 2 years) for a 4 year degree with 1 major change
I am in the same page
I dropped out about 2 years ago, but in my case, it was after I essentially moved 6 times in 2 years. Eventually, I just got to a point of "why am I even doing this when I can't even be sure where I'm gonna live in 6 months?" I want to get back in school, but I just don't see the point (from a professional perspective) when 90% of what you do at work is stuff you learn on the job
@@shadowfox933 That's true, it is kind of pointless!
I took 6 years to finish my 4 year degree. I nearly quit in my last year, but I only needed to finish my thesis to graduate, so I thought why not. This was before I got my diagnosis, so that explained a LOT about my academic troubles.
my 3 year program was the worst 5 years of my life haha.
Never have I read a more relatable sentence.
Dude... I feel that lol
3 years or 5 years?
@@nattieriri a 3 year program that took them 5 years to complete, which is a mood lol
@@poslv9029 thank you 🙏🏽
"Former Gifted Kid Syndrome" is a big part of my life too.. I lowkey gave up on my GPA even though I keep withdrawing and going back... but it sucks because being smart and having good grades used to be a huge part of my self-esteem. I hope you're feeling better nowadays. 🙏💕
Ugh, MEEE! I definitely felt like a failure for not keeping up in uni. Dropping out was ultimately the best decision, though
Wow I feel this so much. I was "the smart one" in my family, first in my family to go to college, and I grew up always being told that I was so smart and I was going to be a huge success. And then reality hit. It took me 3 tries to finish my bachelor's and I got kicked out of my Master's program for failing a course after having a mental breakdown. I was told I could return to school after a year but it's been like a year and a half and I can't get myself to go back. I also lost my job months ago and can't find another one. I feel like the world's biggest failure. It doesn't matter that I have mental health issues and trauma and abuse that I haven't dealt with. It just feels like I messed up. I feel so far detached now from that "smart kid" that I was and I don't even recognize that as me anymore. Like you said, being smart and getting good grades was so much a part of who I was and now I don't even know who I am. It hurts.
@@pansexualsatan I feel this incredibly hard. How old are you? I know that I used to have a ton of anxiety over it but the more I've pushed forward on my own path and found things to be proud of for myself, the more I've been able to let my child-self go, the one that felt ashamed of anything less than perfection. There's more to life than academic success - hobbies, relationships, and simply the day to day of being an adult. I found after about four years of living and working on my own (I'm 23 now) that I feel more like a complete person, and I have less need to compare myself to others because I know my journey is unique and I have confidence in myself. I'm going back to school this fall, but for a job I have learned that i want, not some arbitrary "hard" program to prove my self worth to others.
Edit: not to mention that adults seem to constantly push finding your "dream job" and although there are exceptions I don't really thinks those exist. You just have to find what fits your personality.. but no matter what, it's probably not fun. Otherwise people wouldn't need to be paid for it. Lol
@@pansexualsatan wtf, this feels like it's written by me, I completed 4 yes degree in 6 years cause I hated college so much, I made some loyal friends but made lots of enemies so much that I want to kill all of them , it sucks being autistic , I am 24 and have been kicked out of 2 sales job at 20 years
Yep. Also 6 years into my 4 year course.
Graduated high school in top 3% of graduating scores.
Now I’m recovering from crap grades and sitting in the below average range. Go me.
I’m about to graduate, but every single day in university felt like hell. It’s a traumatizing experience for me, and I feel like a loser when all the uni friends around are so comfortable at school.
I didn’t have the opportunity to just drop out for my sanity, my university didn’t allow dropping out nor did my parents. I got my thesis done, but I’m a mess right now.
You're doing great 💜 you deserve all the success in the world I hope you're proud of yourself for pulling through!
Same, I'm currently in my last year of university and my migraine has worsen, I'm tired all the time and my memory is crap, the only good thing is that i have good teachers.
My husband just went through this. It gets better. Take care of yourself in the next season.
My sister is facing same problem 😔 I don't know what to do .. at the same time I fear of my sister dropping out from University 😭😭
I feel the same. I am almost done but I feel I need to getaway from college or dropped out.
I’m 33, suspect I’m on the spectrum, and have dropped out of university twice and had 10 or so different jobs over the last 15 years. We all have different journeys and some of them look pretty twisty turny . Keep doing what’s best for you :)
Life is larger than any school and any job. Whatever we do we will end up underground in the end. It's really crucial to look after ourselves and prioritise health over ANYTHING else.
I have never found anyone to relate to so much. This is exactly what I’m going through right now and I don’t know what to do.
If I could go back and coach myself through college and university I would be in a much different place. The lessons that I would give myself and that may help you would be to; Therapy, listen to your body, plan to do all the adventures at age 60 and consider everything before that "preparation", your mind is a muscle that needs exercise and rest. Imagine the person you want to be at age 60: the skills you have, the circles you are in, etc and then do all that is necessary to get there.
yesss I'm at a breaking point right now. I'm thinking of dropping out. my mental health has prob never been worse and I reaaly think I have ASD
@@margarida.larchae take care of your mind, be kind to yourself, it's not a race it's a ride.
I have been at the same point 10 years ago...university in mechanical engineering...first year was ok but the last too year was too much and like you said in my head there’s one way to do it...if it’s 4 years you have to make it in 4 years. In the end it was really painful and stressful. I complete 75% of my university in 5 years and after that I drop out. I was stressful when I drop out but so much relief at the same and at that time I started to make my own decision. My parents didn’t really understand what I was dealing with during my study and was always pushing me to finish my university. It’s been a huge change for me but know I feel more happy and less stressful. I had to move from 515km from my parents home to feel more better and started to make my own choices ! Two year ago I bought a home with my girlfriend and give me confidence to be able to do my own thing. Last year I found out that I have autism and made a lot of sens with my past. Sorry for my English I’m french canadian!
Same ... I feel like I’m constantly burned out and usually I can push through it and go on (but with things like hygiene, chores, cleaning etc lacking), but I’ve completely broken down twice before and had to go to the hospital, and I just can feel the third time coming on. But I really don’t want to drop out though; I really like my studies, everything’s perfect about it, but it’s just ... too much. The thing I’m worrying about though is, what can I do next? If I can’t even do something I love, will I be able to do something I hate, long-term?
She looked so much happier after she talked to her academic advisor and dropping out became real... that’s how you know it’s the right thing to do.
University and the trauma that came with it, nearly killed me. It left me completely burnt out and even less confident than when i began my journey. in the end it wasnt worth it, but my aspie brain told me there was only one way to do thing. Uni was a life line out of poverty and trauma. It is great that you made that difficult decision. I hope it worked out:)
I feel like I’ve let everyone down. I moved to a really good university. I haven’t even started the course yet but I’m already dropping out. I’ve been in student halls for 13 days and have already had 2 suicide attempts, one which resulted in me almost dying and spending a night in hospital attached to syringes and machines. Last night I tried to hang myself but survival instincts kicked in and I just couldn’t let myself do it while having an opportunity to save myself. Bipolar is awful, I literally can’t have a normal life like everyone else my age. I am transferring to a university much closer to home, surrounded by family and all the support in the world. I’m also taking up a different course as I’m not in the right frame of mind for such an intense and emotionally challenging career. I just needed to rant to people who understand. Good luck
I'm so happy for you. Well done for loving yourself, this world won't do it for you. Also, I think you're fortunate to be able to seek help with your family. You know, not everyone is trying to hang themselves, not everyone has bipolar, so DON'T YOU DARE compare yourself to people who are doing their course easily. Focus on healing first, my love. I'm so proud of you for carrying on. So well done.
I felt like i was reading myself here istg. Last year i moved to a very good uni... 14 days and an attempt later i ended up back home lol. This year im going to a local college. Less prestige and less opportunity but i need the comfort
as a college drop out my family still doesn't fully understand that it saved my life
You will figure it out eventually! I'm 31 and finally dropped out for good. 3 different colleges, 5 or 6 attempts over nearly 15 years. So many withdrawals and failed classes that I retook. I'm so much happier now that I've made my peace with not having a degree. My quality of life was always terrible when I was in school, and the ableism was wiiilllld. Don't let anyone devalue you because you make choices that are different than what they think you should.
Yeah, man, I tried to stay in school and push through my depression. Wasted a lot of money. Get out swiftly and cleanly, be on good terms and financially stable, and focus on health. Get a dog. School isn't going anywhere.
Jesus Loves you, don't give up. He makes all things new.
@@aboundinggrace7029 I'm an atheist, but thanks anyhow.
Haha I got a dog but I’m still in college (I’m a junior) and the depression honestly has gotten worse. I thought having a dog would make me happy 24/7 which it kind of did but it’s been a year and I still have life problems and feel even more depressed than before I got my dog because back then at least I had him to look forward to 😂
@@gracerideshorses7309 Honestly, he does make the depression worse when I don't take care of him as much as I could. It was a gamble. He's super lovely though so pros and cons, not a fix tho ;-;
@@gracerideshorses7309 same, I have 4 dogs, 1 cat and i take care of my neighbor's dogs too, I'm still depressed but they comfort me a lot, sometimes I ask my mom to let them inside so I can dine with them and cease my anxiety, or I go out to the garden repeatedly and pet them or play with them, one of my dogs is really intuitive and knows how I'm feeling so she always tries to be there with me, in the morning she enters my room so I can pet her, the morning are made of anxiety for me.
Mental illness and university don't mix well. I'm 46 and graduated from university 25 years ago. I enjoyed my time there, but the social side was hell. As you say, you're not dropping out never to return, you're taking time out to improve your mental health. I hope your mental health improves and if you want to return to university, you can and do.
I can completely empathize with how difficult this must’ve been for you being the valedictorian of your high school. I had to leave my program after tormenting myself far too long. I eventually went back and was so proud to finish my program but it was the most difficult thing in my entire life. So proud of you for doing what’s best for Paige.
I dropped out 3 times in 2 different universities due to severe depression. I wish I'd known earlier that education doesn't have to define your life.
same:(
Paige- as a person who dropped out during my sophomore year in college, please know that I believe you made the right choice for yourself. Try not to beat yourself up, there is life without a degree and you have so much time to figure this out. I turned 28 this month, and have managed to find success and happiness over the last 9 years without a degree. If I had never left, I wouldn't have found my true calling. I wish you all the success in the world! ❤️
I dropped out of graduate school this past semester for really similar reasons. It made me tearful watching this video, both because I related to it so much, and also because I’m happy for the decision I made and the decision you are currently making. It was incredibly hard to do, but I feel like it was the right thing for me. With that in mind, I truly applaud your decision. It took a lot of strength to do, I’m sure, but you recognized that’s what you needed. I’m sure that a lot of people are benefiting/will benefit from your words - from all your videos, but this one especially. Looking inward, disregarding the “standard,” and doing what, in the long run, is best for you and all aspects of your life - that’s an incredibly motivational thing to do. You can’t pour from an empty cup, and it makes me happy that you’re going to take some time to fill your cup back up again. You’re going to go so far in life.
I dropped out two years ago! Best thing I’ve done. You can build a platform through RUclips and Instagram. Your going to so far! I personally have asperbergers.
I think for alot of us its best to figure out a way to work from home and generate income from our special interests
May I ask what you are doing now instead of school? I am autistic and i feel like college isn't the place for me however i feel too guilty and scared to drop out
@@Goodegg97 I got really lucky and connected up to people that are huge in the business world. I have a job that i would be doing regardless of school. If you have a vision of going to school to become a doctor or you have a specific field you want to be in for the next 40-50 years go for it. I am not wired to go to school. I like taking risk and getting outside of my comfort zone rather than studying or cramming for a test.
@@yowatdafuq4977 I'm trying to go to med school right now, I'll be honest this scares me a little > < can I ask you why you dropped out Solomon?
Definitely listen to your gut!!! I stuck it out and was so f’in miserable....!!! Senior year I had three to four panic attacks a day. Awful, crazy!!!!
I went to the same school as you and I don't know what its like now but the mental health support used to be absolutely atrocious. I remember not being granted an extension on my essays after my bf passed away AND I was in the middle of pressing charges against someone. They absolutely did not care
Good for you! This must of been so difficult. I was diagnosed with adhd during college and had a really bad time dealing with it. It’s so wise to step away when it’s affecting your will to live. I like your perspective in this video.
Thanks for being so authentic and sharing your journey! You are so right - pausing school (or deciding to stop) doesn’t put your life on hold! Love this message!
Thank you that your channel exists. I've been searching for content about this subject - from someone who is being informative rather than emotional.
I finished my BSc in 6 years after struggling my way through but too stubborn to stop something I had started. I'm 31 and was literally diagnosed with ASD today (yes, in the middle of a pandemic on top of everything else). I wonder what I would have done at your age had I been diagnosed earlier in my life. I don't know what this news means for my life going forward but self-knowledge is power I guess...Keep listening to yourself.
I have autism( aspergers ) and i am in 6th year and have 10 exams left our exams happen only twice a year and now theres this pandemic i have dropped out cause i cant do this anymore
So proud of you Morgan! Very inspirational. Thank you (:
I have to take additional year to complete my BA in English coz of personal issues I had to deal with in the former semesters and I had to withdraw 2 semesters.
It's looking like it's going to be 6 years for me, but I failed some stuff, and had to drop some classes. I changed degrees slightly. One of my profs is really good and he's been open about his struggles with depression and anxiety, which is nice that someone at least relates to part of it. I'm hoping to see a psychologist about autism, as the one I saw after first year said that it could be ADHD or autism, as I have a chronic illness that often comes with ADHD type of stuff.
@@Traumatised311 I ❤️ your name!
I am also afflicted with Aspergers.
I graduated from a Pennsylvania State school in 2006, with a B.S. in Industrial Technology. I graduated High School In the spring of 1999; Started college in the fall.... that was the long way of explaining that I took 7 years to get a 4 year degree...
RUclips, and the Algorithm brought me here; I’m 40, Dyslexic, Autistic.
I spent *YEARS* contemplating suicide; and now that there is this flood of information and other Aspergers autistics speaking up - I’m glad I didn’t go the route of making a permanent mistake, to try and fix temporary problems!!
11 months ago I stopped drinking alcohol; after basically 20 years of daily heavy “Alcoholic” abuse.
(I think) I was using alcohol to mask my stimming habits?!?!?
Thanks to RUclips, in addition to learning more about almost anything, I make playlists of songs. And I am constantly adding any post that remotely sparks interest, to my “Watch later” play list. I put (1) EarPod in, and alternate from Music when i am “getting Shit Done” and news posts, when I have the time to google the endless barrage of questions my mind constantly is creating. (I highly recommend a band called: *AIM TO HEAD* and a particular playlist of theirs called HAVOC; it just relaxes me - but I doubt anyone would call it “relaxing music”.
This is about the EXACT time I brought my son home from college but only in 2020. I told him it is just a bump in the road. He started a few classes from home. We wrapped our arms around him and are figuring it out. It will be ok.
You're a lovely parent
Hi Paige, I'm proud of you for being so brave in posting this. I think a lot of people need to hear how it's NORMAL to have these kind of issues. First step in solving these issues is acknowledging. Next step is acceptance. Finally last step is doing something about it. Wish you best of luck! Don't give up!
As a neurodiverse person myself (ADHD) I can completely relate to this! I actually had to take a break from last semester due to needing a mental health break. I’ve been in school since 2015, earned my Associates at my own pace and now I’m halfway finished with my Bachelors. It’s taking me a while but I’ve found that I do best when I take less credits. Slow and steady wins the race :)
I know this is a year old, but it’s good to see. I’m almost 35, realizing now that I’m likely autistic and have adhd, and pushing through college, through abuses and trauma, was one of the worst things I did. Though graduating despite all that is still one of my proudest achievements. It took me years to heal, and when I first returned home I couldn’t function for months. Then more stuff happened and ultimately I became too sick to work and needed multiple surgeries, I couldn’t do anything but try to heal, but some of my health I may never regain. I just want to encourage everyone to take care of themselves.
I am sad it happened to you. I am also probably on spectrum and have SEVERE social anxiety and struggle with connecting to people.
Thank you for uploading this, it's exactly what I needed to see. I am taking a pause on my uni course because I have just been burnt out and depressed and I just need a break, but I have been feeling awful about it because I just feel like I'm running away from my problems, when I'm not, I'm trying to fix my problems and get better, so thank you! x
Paige! I found your videos on TT. I work with elementary special ed students, on the spectrum, and who have suffered trauma. You are AMAZING! I finally figured out to look for you elsewhere, so I can share your experiences with some of my students. The short, informational and personal experience videos you post on TT are fana-freaking-tastic. Please, please, PLEASE do more of those here where they are accessible to a wider audience! I don't feel comfortable sharing TT with the little kids, if you know what I mean;) Your message is SO FREAKING IMPORTANT!!!! I really hope you read this. I haven't watched this video yet; I was so excited to find you here, but I'll watch in a minute; but honestly, I think it's probably good you dropped out of college. You have clearly found a calling here, with the video inspiration you create. Thank you for your efforts. Thank you for your knowledge. Thank you for the risk you take posting these videos. You are def a terrific motivational speaker, and I believe if you pursue such a path, speaking to the community about neuro-difference, you will be a hugely positive force for understanding and acceptance. You don't need college; you need a course in public speaking and speech writing. Thank you thank you thank you! (I know this is weird; I hope I didn't put you off; there's a distinct possibility that my toes are dipped in the spectral pool... but I'm old now, and they didn't worry about such things when I was a kid.)
I just dropped out of college recently. I'm getting my autism assessment done on September 3rd. I'm not doing well and I hope I've found out why I am the way I am. Thank you for sharing your experience. I can really relate.
Paige, I’m so proud of you. I’m autistic, and can for sure relate that it seems like everything has to be black and white. And it’s a challenge too not have things go to plan. I love how you are so transparent with everyone. Sending love girl, and you have made life better for so many autistic girls. It’s amazing having someone to relate too. Your life has so much worth !
I put off taking time to work on my mental health for 3 years for the same reason. I eventually was forced to take a semester off when I sank into alcoholism and lost my financial aid due to my grades slipping. If you need to take time off, do it. Otherwise you’ll end up with someone else making that choice for you.
wow ... it was like you were literally describing my own drop out experience . like spot on . whats even crazier is that it was the same time last year , literally the same month , that i had to do the same thing in order to heal from a lot of shit i had been ignoring to the point that i became extremely depressed/drained and suicidal ... starting flunking my classes and lost more than one job, etc . I know that this is a bold statement but i truly feel like i know what you had to go through mentally and emotionally , much love to you ! i know how difficult it was to be in that position in life and even tho i dont know you im proud of you for doing what you had to do to begin healing
New to your videos and I just want to say you’ve helped me so much in my journey to discovering my ASD diagnosis and also finding my true self.
As many women and girls do, I masked my entire childhood and adolescence, it wasn’t until starting therapy for depression and anxiety stemming from PTSD and researching ASD in girls and women did I realize that I am autistic and the lack of diagnosis and proper support during my childhood caused my trauma.
I still have a LONG ways to go, but everyday I feel I step more and more into who I truly am, thank you for helping me and others on this journey of self discovery.
PS: girl your eyelashes are gorgeous! You’re just gorgeous in general but your eyelashes really caught my eye!
Take care
Good on you. I’m severely depressed, but I just keep working on assignments to stay afloat :(
I love that little laugh when you said you were going to do it, I feel like that was such an autistic 'I'm breaking the rules' laugh. I do that every single time I do something that you're 'not supposed to do'
Omg! I dropped out of UC Berkeley because of mental health and was in denial for a very long time. 12 years later I have a very good job that pays very well, we bought our home 3 years ago in Southern California (where it’s stupid expensive), it’s been tough but somewhere somehow things worked themselves out. I realize this is a video posted a year ago, so I hope you’re feeling better.
The 4 year path is not right for everyone! I went into my first school intending to do the 4 years. It was a lot more rigorous and demanding than my high school, and I had only been diagnosed with ADHD since my junior year. I struggled much harder than I ever had in my life. I got D's in a few classes. Still, I pushed through a year and a half because a lot of other people were dropping out or transferring and I didn't want to give up. But by the end of my first semester sophomore year, I realized it no longer felt like home and I was only there for my friends. My roommate that semester transferred out at the same time and they left about a week before I did. That time alone gave me a lot of time to think. I ended up transferring to a local community college back home. Because the schedules were different, I had a full month off. That still didn't stop me from being burned out most of that first semester. I had a few bad grades again, but I ended up re-taking one of the courses later on and doing much better. I graduated from the community college after 2 1/2 years, then went on to a different 4-year for two years to finish my undergrad. Finally, I spent 3 years on grad school (2 years of classes and the final one was my internship & masters project). I started college in fall 2009 and got my Masters degree in May 2018. I'm glad I allowed myself to refocus my efforts instead of pushing through the stress. I believe that if I had fully quit during some of those moments I questioned myself, I would have had a very hard time going back to school later on. But that's just my brain and my experience! Listening to your brain and your body is one of the most important things you can do.
The more I watch your videos the more I realize that I relate to you a lot. I dropped out of a university before I even had my first day of class. I was also having problems with my mental health and wanting to live. I got the help that I needed, but I didn’t enroll in school again and decided to just take a break for now and honestly I don't know if I'll ever do school again. I’m glad you did what was best for your mental health even though it might have been hard. I'm so glad I found your page and I'm able to follow you on your journey ❤️
this video make my cry, there is nothing i can do to help you, but my heart is with you. Get well, the most important thing is health, and mental health is a much more powerfull thing than people imagine
i love you and admire your courage
I almost dropped out in 4th year. Had a manic episode and called my mom at 3am crying about how I’m leaving for Ireland.
I ended up finishing my degree but I was a manic and depressive yo-yo. I dropped out of my honours to be able to finish on time.
Thank you for expressing your struggles. 💕
I honestly love hearing someone speak so openly about suicide and not wanting to be here anymore. On another video where you talked about your mom asking you one day if you wanted to/may take your own life, it reminded me of when my mom asked me the same thing and it was the first step on my journey to improving my mental health. It's so important not to shy away from these topics! Bringing up suicide to someone you think may be suicidal will not push them towards it, but may save their life! You're not putting suicidal thoughts in their head, as they're already there
Hang in there Paige. It doesn’t have to be permanent. I dropped out for three years - and ended up going back after I was in the right place to do it. Do the right thing for yourself!
This video really hit me hard; I can relate to those feelings of depression and feeling guilty for not being able to do something that you feel like is almost required of you (like finishing school). I also went off to university literally 2 weeks after graduating high school just to get out of my parent's house, which wasn't a great place to be (to say the least). I had so many mental health issues and trauma that I never addressed. My parents didn't believe in therapy. I was self harming and made multiple attempts on my life. I ended up self medicating with hard drugs. I dropped out after 2 years and eventually was able to finish my degree online a few years after that. But even that took me 2 tries because I got pregnant at 23 and couldn't manage school and a new baby. After I finished undergrad, I went to grad school. Had a mental breakdown in year 2 of that, failed a course, got dropped from the program, was told I could return after a year. Now a little over a year has passed and I am constantly beating myself up because I know I should be trying to get back into school but I can't and I don't feel ready and I'm terrified. I'm not autistic but I have pretty bad mental health issues and a lot of trauma that I still haven't dealt with, including years of abuse. I'm also a single parent. And I always blame myself and I sink into these deep pits of depression that I can't seem to crawl out of for months and months. I honestly only hold on because of my son and I don't think I'd be alive if not for him; he's all that matters to me in the world. I am sober and in therapy for a few months now. I think it's so important to get the help you need and do what is best for your own health and your own sanity. Everyone's journey looks different and that is not a bad thing. I know this is an old video but I just found your channel and I saw this and I felt compelled to comment because I've been going through deep depression for months now and it's hard sometimes just to keep going. Sorry this comment is so long. I've just subscribed and I'm going to go watch the rest of your videos. Hope you're doing well! Take care of yourself, stay safe and healthy. Much love!
Good on you for putting this up, really brave. I believe in you.
I am literally in the exact same place at the moment, I'm dropping out of uni as well because I don't want to be here. This is insane. Thank you for sharing this video paige!
I can already see that weight dropping from your shoulders after you dropped out. Seeing this from the perspective of knowing future you gives me hope.
Just thought I’d let you know that I literally last week I got my autism diagnosis and you’ve inspired me so much in getting through school and stuff because I can see you’re a successful young woman. I’m glad you are doing what you want to do. I hope to be like you one day
Hello Paige! I recently found your RUclips Channel! I turn 26 this year and I was diagnosed with Autism at 7 years old. I have checked out a few of your videos and I don't feel so alone anymore as well as I feel less like an Alien! Your videos have helped me alot and made me see alot of traits I didnt know I even had! This is one of my fav RUclips Channels! Thanks for all you do and being yourself!!!! Also in the school area my grades were okay but I struggled so much with them... I had a hard time keeping up and focusing and some of my teachers didnt seem to even care! I graduated from High School in 2014 and I have wanted to go to college or Uni but I have huge seperarion anxiety and I cant afford it at all. I have so many things Id try to study for if I could find a way to do college.
I was in this exact situation trust, i just dropped out of uni last month and it’s like a weight was lifted from my shoulders. Now it’s time to worry about wtf im gunna do to afford a life lol 🤡
Uni was defo not the one for me tho i can say that. I also went because it’s the done thing and i wasnt ready to get a job after highschool. Best of luck to you x
I wish I could have seen this video while I was still studying at the university,
instead I got a severe autistic-burn-out without knowing I was on the spectrum at that time,
I was forced to go back home and got into a psychotic episode
it's never been the same since. Looking back at it now, I wish I could have had the strength to drop out before losing my mind and crashing hard like I did. It wasn't healthy at all and it took me a long time to recover! You did the right thing!
Also, I’m so proud of you 🥰 mental health is important!!
It's ok if you're unable to "fix" it quickly. It took me decades to realize I'm also learning just how broken everyone else is.
God's original design for you is to accomplish something only YOU can. Find out who you are.. your innate (born with) gifts, your unique personality, your deepest passions/desires and find where those meet.
I mentioned decades... stil discovering myself... still learning... but now I'm making a difference.
Hey paige. Really wish the best for your mental health. Its really true that life could get really stressful sometimes and we cant avoid that fact. I may not be much but i would be here for you at your trying times we're gonna make it through the path of healing. 🙌🙏
This is literally how college went for me, I graduated high school in 2016 and waited to go to college until fall 2019 because I was certain I was a ‘bad’ student. Then I did great in the first 2 quarters of my freshman year, then COVID hit and I did sort of ok in the 3rd quarter online, but after that it was a huge downward spiral in terms of my motivation and mental health. I took 2 quarters off after fall 2020 started, then I came back in fall 2021, thinking I was ready to return, despite having a sudden traumatic family event occur over the summer. So the same thing happened again, and I put myself in a second leave of absence because financial aid won’t cover me at this school anymore until they approve petitions from me, but they need to see that my mental health has improved drastically (turned out I have depression, anxiety, and Other Trauma or Stressor Related Disorder, on top of the diagnoses I got when I was 8 years old: ASD and ADHD). The reason that’s important is I can’t just take a class at a time, I’m only covered with financial aid if I take a full course load (and I can’t afford school without it). so in the meantime I’ve been just going to therapy and working. I don’t know if I’ll come back to the college I’ve been going to because I moved with my bf who is finishing college here in 2 months so we will move out of this area, and I don’t know what to do after that because the area we would move to doesn’t have the same programs for my major to do what i want to do (Japanese and Asian studies). So the future is uncertain but I can’t worry that much about it rn
It’s easier to finish school when you’re younger. But none of that matters if it’s going to destroy you. Your health is paramount. Mental health included. So do that. Don’t look back. You can get back to school some other time.
I was never diagnosed with autism, (I have severe depression and that's my only diagnosis). I'm 21 now...I dropped out of uni two times already, now I am back at uni in uk for the third time, (to a completely new major). I thought it would make a change as I left my country to study here. But nothing changed. And with every video of you that I watch, I see more of me in you. I'm so happy that you are happy now!
I completely get the "failure" thing. I want to have an education cause that's the only trait you get credit for right?(I still don't know what the answer is) . My family were never hard on me, like never! But I am hard on myself all the time, so yeah...I guess I'm trying to say that I get you and you're not alone
Do you feel like the world or society is fast paced or just pushing you along? I do
Dragging me along more like it
Thank you for this video. Made me feel relieved from the choices I made, that I knew they were the right ones for me, but I felt so judged by others because of them. Is good to find somebody that get it, how difficult life can be...
I am austistic and dropping out of university or college is the best thing you can do to yourself
Solomon D'Or it’s been 2 weeks...hope your explorations have been fruitful :)
Really? How? I'm goin throught bad period cus of this
@@yowatdafuq4977 mental problems?! I dunno! But the only thing I deduce this year is that Uni is not made for me! I know that the reaction of my parents was 🥺 but I dont like how my uni life is and the problem is that i dunno wht to do if i drop out!
@@yowatdafuq4977 I'm from Spain
I had to drop out of college for the sake of my mental health, I'm in the fortunate position where I can re-evaluate what I want to do with my life, I've too much pride to not want to do good and give back to society, I'll find my way, I've learned lessons, I've broken and pieced myself back together, I feel no guilt or shame, the only way is up now. I'm gonna watch this video later but everyone please know that shame and guilt does no good, try and be happy and kind that's what the world needs.
This was amazing! So proud of you! Stalked your Instagram a bit and it looks like you’re doing so much better and look so happy!! Certainly gives hope to people who are struggling! There’s a silver lining yet!
❤ I've been struggling with my mental health too and I think you've made a good decision for yourself
This is a year old and I've seen more recent videos, so first, I'm so glad you got through this and made it to where you are.
2nd, you're amazing for sharing your struggles and for following your heart and instincts to do what's best for you. It's your life--gotta do what's best for you. Self-care is vital.
3rd, I hope more people can understand that University is not the only option in life. For so long kids are taught that college is everything but it's not. For some careers it's necessary but definitely not for all.
I never went away for school. I got my Associates at a community college while living at home. Took 4.5 years cause I worked and took my time. (My mom died a few years later. Didn't know it was going to happen, but boy am I glad I had those extra years that I would not have had if I was away.)
Then I did a 10 month program in graphic design, fell in love with it, and have spent the past 15+ years pursuing that passion and interest. Luckily for me, that career journey has many paths. I'm both self-taught and have taken classes from different places whenever I needed to learn a specific skill. In my profession, (now as Senior UX/UI designer) you need to keep educating yourself and evolving. Some workplaces require a degree but many don't (the reasonable and less biased companies don't.)
I still have not completed a Bachelor's degree and at this point I'd be lying if it wasn't partly to prove a point. The other part is there is always some other kind of training or certification that seems more relevant.
But to anyone out there considering applying for or dropping out of college, please remember one thing. College should not be a destination or a goal, it is one possible path to a goal (depending on what your goal is.) And your goal should be based on what you want to do with your life. If when you reach college age you still aren't sure (which is totally expected) then do whatever is the cheapest to try things out and find out what you want to do with your life. Don't invest tens of thousands of dollars to experiment and find yourself. I guarantee you there are cheaper and more meaningful wats to do that without the years of college debt. Take care of yourselves, your wellbeings, and your journeys. And always think outside the box.
Can't believe this is your first video you're really natural
She has a good following on tiktok
Thank you so much for sharing Paige. I am so glad you made the decision to drop out of university. As someone that has diagnoses, just different ones, I also have struggled a lot with doing what is "normal" like going straight from grade school to university. You matter more than school and you can always decide to continue on later. Loved this video!
Did anyone else see the orb in the upper lefthand corner of the video at 2:01-2:03?
You’re protected, Paige 💗 I hope you’re feeling way better these days
It sounds like you're finding yourself. That's a good thing.
Self teaching is often best way to go.
im autistic and i didnt end up going to college when i graduated high school in 2019. im currently enrolled in a vocational school and im studying equine science and management (horses). its honestly the best decision ive ever made. idk what im gonna do once this school year is over (its a 2 year program) but we'll cross that bridge when we get to it lol. rn im just happy to have found something i love with my entire soul. 😌💖
I follow you on TikTok and you have helped me so much. I’m an autistic woman and you were capable of explaining things I want to explain to people and can’t manage to. Thank you so much for raising awareness. I couldn’t message you on TikTok so it goes here...thank you for being you! You have helped me.
I had to drop out of college because of my PTSD. I took time to heal and now, years later, am going back to get a degree in social work to help other people who suffer like I did. Take care of yourself first! You are so strong and valuable to this world.
Man... I wish I had this video 5years ago. Instead my parents pressured me into getting into different educations.
I'm way late on this, but I'm proud of you for doing what you needed to. I almost killed myself forcing my way through college. I had to be hospitalized, and I ended up signing myself out even though they wanted me to stay but I was panicking about the coursework I was missing. Can attest that it doesn't get better if you don't work on it.
I really hope that this decision helped you.
Keep being true to yourself Paige, you got this!! Sending prayers your way! 💛
I honestly can't express how much this video means to me. I was in such a similar situation around the same time and even seeing this retroactively feels so good. Gonna rewatch this video when I feel down.
I’m at a very similar point in my life right now. Just got out of inpatient, and started my semester this week-and I’m already feeling anxious and miserable in class. It’s just got worse and worse over the years, and my doctors recommended I at least take the semester off… But I am in a financial situation where if I leave school now (and lose my scholarship bc of that), I might not be able to get my degree at all. Suppose this is a vent comment more than anything 😅 Just want to say, thank you for this video. It’s given me a lot to think about, and it helps knowing I’m not alone.
My kid’s only a high school freshman, but we talk about college and I had to reassure them several times that a four year degree away at school is not the only way to do life well.
I did the same at 19. I didn't fit in and the pressure was just too much. I cried all the time and I just couldn't cope. I thought the people were cruel (and they were) but I think they also thought I was strange. I took some time. Moved home. Went to the gym and swimming every morning and had a nice lunch and read. I worked a part time job. It was all hard I didn't want to do anything but I am intelligent and I knew that allowing myself to spiral would be a bad thing for me.
Later, I went to another university and studied law and taxation. I made a couple of friends. I generally had a quiet time, continued to work part time, went home often. I'm 33 now and a chartered Tax adviser. My journey has been slower than some, and often has difficult times. I've recently established that I have asd and adhd and that'll explains so many struggles over my life and why I never felt like I fit in.
I watched the video you did more recently with your mum and she could have been talking about me too. Thanks for creating the videos. You'll go far whatever you do. And just 'being' is OK too. Simple pleasures are often the happiest times. Take care x
PS. I literally have no memory now of dropping out of university,like who I spoke to or what I had to do, my brain has erased it!
I would love to see more videos from you.
I dropped out too a few years ago... I´m still fighting. It felt like the end of the world and sometimes it still does... but well... maybe the world needs to be kinder to people... we shouldn´t have to feel that way. I thought I could change and help but the world and people in it proved me wrong. So now I´m kind of lost. I hope you have a better experience and that you feel better now.
I go to the same university, and am finally taking a semester off after the worst academic year of my life 😅 I'll go back to finish, but I'll be sane next time (instead of living in absolute mental agony lol)
Its always been hard for me to understand depression and anxiety because its something i just dont struggle with, and ive alway thought that people with depression can just choose to be happy, but the more people i know that commits suicide or just never gets better the more i understand its actually basically uncurable. Hopefully your videos can help a soul or two, and most importantly may it help you get better, Miss Paige
This video is so important. I applaud you for all your efforts to share honestly and help end stigma for a variety of conditions. Such a mature and vital message for everyone.
I’m so glad you dropped out. I kept going in (from as far as I can tell) a somewhat similar situation and I so easily might not have made it through, but my brain was like no, you can’t drop out, you can’t fail, you must continue suffering even if it kills you. You have to prioritise your health, college will be there later. I finished my degree but I’m still a total mess, as I didn’t have the option of mental health support at that time and it’s so important ❤️
I graduated with my master's back in 2017, and gave it everything I had and then some. Since then, I have been struggling to find work and have used the Internet to learn coding such as Python and SQL. I have even taken some certification courses in attempts to gain employment. I recently dropped out of a master's in data science program and am probably about to drop out of a two-year software development program as well. The fact is, I feel like I attained the skills necessary to gain a job with my degree and what I have been self-teaching myself through the Internet. I am beyond burnt out on due dates for assignments and dealing with instructors who do not know how to teach. I just simply want to find an entry level job and learn the skills on the job. I've had enough of the stresses that come with the college life. I may go for a couple more certifications, but I think it's time to focus on finding a job and put this academic stuff behind me! Besides, I learn more through RUclips videos than I have with any programming instructor. Then again, once I do find employment, I will probably try and finish my software development degree one class at at time as it will probably be easier given that I will be gaining skills on the job.
You inspire me so so much. Mental health is far more important than education. Take care of yourself, get back on your feet, do therapy and heal. And once you’re ready, do whatever you feel is right. This video is helping to normalize mental illness and needing to take a break from schooling so you can come back at your best! University isn’t for everyone. Thank you for sharing your story. Your transparency is inspiring ❤️
I regret not dropping out of university. I now do something that is not to do with the career I planned, but I love what I do right now. University is pointless if you ask me, you just sit there and learn stuff that won’t change your life from a person who has probably not contributed anything to the industry. I just found it disinteresting but I felt forced to go by my family to prove I was smart.
I could definitely have done with your spirit and wisdom in 2016.
Omg girl you are so strong, I love your personality! I wish you all the best, I'm on my year off right now and idk if I'm going back to my law school I did that because I was feeling so depressed but right now I'm worried that I ruined my life 🤷🏻♀️🤦🏼♀️ but being at home helps me so much
I dropped out of school twice. Still no 4 year degree, but maybe someday 😊 or maybe not. Who knows!
Also, it’s funny watching this old video vs new videos and the difference in masking levels 😅