I've never necessarily had a PROBLEM with eye contact like many autistic people do, I don't find it uncomfortable like they describe. However, I do find that I'm just sort of disinterested in eye contact, and also that I stare into space sometimes to focus on what someone is saying (especially if they're explaining something). I often look around their face, either at anything interesting - especially any distinct parts of their makeup, I find - or at their mouth because that's what moves when talking, you know?
For a long time I thought that I couldn’t be autistic because I liked small talk but then in therapy one day I was talking about how I felt like I nailed a conversation with a barista and realized that I treat it as a performance and as an actor I only liked small talk because it was an easy script 😂
This just made me crack up because i realized after reading it, that I like small talk for the same reason!! It is SO exciting when I have a perfectly executed social interaction, and I never put together that I love it because it’s like acting a part for a moment
thats such a good way to put it!! ive always hated small talk, its like being called up on stage and improvising, and for someone who's shy this becomes even more difficult. but after a LOT of masking and learning from other people/movies, ive finally become more confident and my performances have improved, and i've grown to enjoy it 😎
Autism is so varied and I hate how people have a very strict idea of what it is and dismiss other autistics that experience the world in a completely different way of what this idea is
When people find out I’m autistic they think I’m lying cause I’m too normal. No I’m just masking.... just cause I’m not non vocal or have a noticeable stim doesn’t mean I’m not autistic. I’ll trust the doctor thanks
I used to enjoy writing perfectly small and straight letters at school. It helped me focus and feel good, I saw it as pretty and so mine. My tutors would tell me to write bigger and so... I started writing big fat letters like a toddler.
My husband and I watched this together. He is in the process of trying to get his professional diagnosis. Every few minutes he would pause the video and expand on his viewpoints and felt validated.
This doc helped my son improve and get over autism with his herbs His name is Dr Oyalo on channel My sons speech and behavior/social skill has improved perfectly using his herbs
Except that words aren’t the only form of human communication so those of us who are able to interpret body language and facial expressions aren’t the ones who are wrong. Plus, there isn’t anything infantile about other modes of behavior besides speech. That just sounds like sour grapes from someone who can’t process and adapt to such modes. In other words, don’t dump on other people’s ways of communicating if you don’t want to be dumped on.
I say this all the time. Also, NTs think they can tell what people are thinking/feeling by looking at them, but sadly their track record is not great. Seen so many hate each other because of false assumptions about what each other "meant" by X or Y. Maybe ask and listen. Just a thought.
@@saruhhhh your comment sounds a bit snide, but i'll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume it's a genuine question. the answer is no, it's not nearly that simple. something like 90% of human communication occurs through what we call "microexpressions." these are very small, VERY subtle hints toward someone's feelings that most neurotypical people process & understand without even realizing!! these microexpressions allow for complicated nonverbal messages such as passive aggression. these microexpressions are a form of communication that a lot of autistic people don't just innately grasp- to a neurotypical person, it might be "obvious" that their coworker is quietly peeved based on a couple of offhand comments; an autistic person might struggle to read into subtle nonverbal cues and just take the coworker's words at face value. (i.e. if he says he's "not mad at all" but his tiny microexpressions suggest otherwise, a neurotypical person vs an autistic person will probably interpret his message differently.) honestly, even if you ONLY interact with neurotypical people EVER (which would be hard to believe), good communication can only benefit. if you're upset with someone, communicate that in a mature, straightforward way, and you'll save yourself (and everyone around you) a lot of grief.
broooo. The excessive eye contact. It's great in class because my teachers like that I'm paying attention, but unfortunately I'm paying so much visual attention that I process nothing they're saying. Also, I have family and partners who constantly ask me to stop staring them down when we're supposed to be having a casual conversation/hang out.
I do that because I’m trying so hard to pay attention or more like make it seem as though I am paying attention so that I don’t seem rude so while I can remember things easily in ways , not always during convos as most of my focus is taken up to attempt to pay attention and seem engaged rather than panicky and awkward.
Once I was thinking about eye contact so much that I started staring and my math teacher actually asked if I was ok. I was like “yep I’m fine :,D” and just stopped looking at her face at all for the rest of the conversation.
Nobody never seems to be comfortable with my intense staring of looking to the periphery of my visual field when speaking to them. I do it out of respect. Because to me staring too much or too intensley can be like the perceptive reaction of a dog or chimpanzee that is considered a threatening jesture. I feel animal like mostly. Not human so much.
Repetitive and restrictive behaviors: getting Disney plus and scrolling through all the programs and movies for hours and hours to make a complete watchlist of everything you want to see, without actually ever watching any of said programs/movies.
Haha when I visit my mother-in-law we always watch movies together. We have wildly different tastes, so picking a movie can take hours (if we even succeed), but I found that just scrolling through the movies is entertainment enough. I like to just look at them. Sometimes I imagine myself watching them. Rarely do though
It's really funny to me what you said about reading face expressions or mimics. So i am seventeen and was diagnosed with asd (my official diagnosis was asperger's but... yknw) about 8 months ago. And so when I was growing up, I was so frustated with not understanding faces that I spent years uncounsciously learning what every single little face movement meant which means that now, i can read social meaning in every slight movement and deduct what the person is thinking. I am more skilled at understing other people's emotions than NT because I've had to learn it. But now, people often get freaked out by just how much i can get in their head. They think i'm a wizard with telepathic abilities and honestly, i'm not mad about it.
i understand you because that’s what happened to me but i use psychology to understand people’s behaviour. i studied in high school and i’m still doing it on my own and it helped me understand people instead of being completely lost
this!! i studied body language and mimicked facial expressions in the mirror to understand people better. now i’m uncannily good at recognising patterns in people and making assumptions of their emotions and thoughts bcus of that. it freaks ppl out sometimes
I’ve done this too and I suspect that I have asd but my mum always says, ‘no you don’t because you are so good at reading emotions’ but that’s only because I’ve tried to teach myself! Omg, and I’m not even that good, it’s only with people I know that do certain things when they are having a certain emotion.
I think one of the things that I've been really caught up in in my journey of a potential autism diagnosis is the friend thing. I want friends. I crave friends. I want a girl group. I want to be in a group of girls who all hangs out and are all touchy and give big hugs and cuddle and watch movies and are all the cliches of TV and movies but I struggle SO MUCH. I don't know how to talk to people. I hyperfocus and annoy people. Being touched drives me nuts if I'm not comfortable with you, and then I assume all physical touch is romantic because the only person who ever touches me is my boyfriend. But I want to be social, and I want to be neurotypical and I want to have those "normal" friendships, but my brain just won't let me. Anyone else on the spectrum feel this way?
Being touched drives me nuts cause I am asexual and autistic anyone touching me makes me angry my family won't understand , but if I am emotionally close then I touch them alot ,wtf
okay u just described me perfectly!! ahh and this makes me more enthusiastic about masking so i do it a lot and dedicate so much energy towards friends because i enjoy it so much. so if i ever run out of energy or something changes/goes wrong, im in big trouble - i will keep trying to push myself to make everyone comfortable and not worry about me because i still want to be there, but internally so frustrated with myself, being like why cant my brain just let me enjoy myself
This! Because in most my research it’s labeled as “oh you hate this or you hate that if you’re autistic” and it’s more like I don’t hate it. I want to be involved in it desperately and I like the idea of being able to do it but I just can’t and I’m horrible at it but I want to.
I use to be so ashamed of myself for doing this but, I often live my life through tv shows, books films etc. So I will pretend to a character when I do anything for example walking my dog I always imagine I'm this other tv book or film character doing it. I always have. I can spend hours in my own head just imagining how they would live there lives. Just found out it has a name "maladaptive daydreaming"
SAME! i repeat watch a select few tv shows bcs i live in those worlds and feel like they’re my friends/family. makes me feel safe. i go about my day talking to them in my head
I'm autistic and obsessed with ethnicities, language families, etc... it gives me a feeling of understanding the human social structure. I feel like a part of a big family since I like everyone have an ethnic background lol
ooo this makes me so happy to see because i thought i was really weird for being obsessed with these! and i feel the same way (the familial part of it)
This is making me feel like I should go get tested for autism, just so I'd know. It would explain a lot. A LOT. I had to "learn" so much about how to interact with people in a "normal" way. I feel like most of my social skills were from people explaining to me how humans worked. I'm good at it, but it was never natural for me.
Same here! Most of my social skills came from SO much research/observation on the people around me like my family, classmates, and especially the shows. I’d copy their reactions and non verbal cues and practice them when I’m alone. I’d sit for hours listening to music while imagining like 30 different paths to one scenario and figure out which ones the most “natural.” I’m good at faking the conversation flow now, but it didn’t come without really hard work. I don’t want to self diagnose tho so I’ve never told this to anyone else before.
its also important to know that its not just social struggles. its also delayed walking, speach problems a a kid, sensory issues, not playing pretend and instead of playing with your toys you just brush their hair, snuff them or line them up, having obsessions with objects or subjects, needing a routine and if it changes it causes information processing overload, having trouble from going from one task to the other smoothly etc. it has to be from birth all the way up until now to be diagnosed because if its only something that developed later in life its possibly most likely anxiety or a form of ptsd. I really hope you get the answers youre looking for. i really do. i wish you all the best and i hope this information helps in some way
For me in a a social gathering I’ll take in the situation and decide which mood, smile, voice fits but after the event I feel exhausted from having to match what is socially acceptable
@@SoraByers Same. And my cousin has nice clothes that she wears to church and school and comfy clothes she wears elsewhere... I'm like "What?!" why do you have to wear different things at different places?
It's like having to wear uniform for school because it's a "formal setting". I've always been annoyed at how most Americans can wear their own clothes to school, like why should we have to dress up to go somewhere I don't even want to be in the first place lol
I think I was about 14 the first time I heard people say that they act differently in different contexts, which I found very weird and confusing and my initial reaction was that they were "fake" for essentially putting on different acts depending on the situation. Turns out that's basically what you're supposed to do and I'm the weird one for always being the same 🙃
My special interests have always involved different medical conditions, disabilities, or mental disorders. I became obsessed with autism before I was diagnosed lol. I think these topics were relatable to me since I always felt different from the “typical” person. So I liked the learn about other ways people’s bodies and brains could work differently
Does that mean it’s possible to be diagnosed with autism, or at leas autism spectrum disorder, later on in life? Because I’ve always shown symptoms of it and they started growing more and more prominent when I began puberty I think and I’ve been wondering if I really am neurotypical or not.
Same haha. I have had a lot of qualities of autism my whole life and I've always wondered if I could be autistic. But then again, it may just be anxiety and OCD (I'm diagnosed with both). Idk its so confusing.
I feel like I definitely have autism but unfortunately everyone in my life thinks that I don’t because they don’t understand how good I am at masking. I can match anyone’s personality almost immediately and I also have ALOT of the same things that you have. I have anxiety, depression and ADHD. I also am sensitive to loud noises and as a kid I wouldn’t even flush the toilet or use the blow dryer. I also HATE small talk, I don’t even know how to do it. It’s really hard for me and doesn’t come naturally at all. I’m very content not having many friends at all. I constantly question my entire existence and I just feel that I think differently from most people.
@@OzCroc hi! That’s actually a very exclusionary and privileged view :) autism diagnoses can be incredibly difficult to get and completely inaccessible for some people, e.g. due to incredibly long waiting lists in countries with free healthcare (think it’s 3 years where I live) and extortionate prices for an assessment (it’s an entire month of my salary where I live and HEllo people have bills and rent to pay). Self-diagnoses (provided they are done with a LOT of research to back them up) have to be valid for as long as clinical diagnosis is inaccessible.
@@DoNotTestMe Yeah no. I understand that getting a diagnosis is hard, but there's no point in saying you have autism on the internet unless you actually have it. So many people don't understand what being autistic is actually like and go off stereotypes and it's frustrating as someone who is actually autistic.
I think I played pretty typically as a kid, but as an adult one of my favorite ways to feel accomplished/soothed during times of trouble is to "nest." This can look like tidying the space around me, trying to set the atmosphere in different ways like lighting or scent, and figuring out how to utilize a space the best way for me.
I can feel the satisfaction through the screen that she feels from reading those lines. Exactly what she felt and struggled with her whole life, and the validation in form of a real, acknowledged fucking diagnosis on paper that says "you are NOT 'lazy' or deliberately sabotaging your life just to piss people off after all".. it feels good even second hand. I'm glad you got the diagnosis, many lives messed up because they never find out or very late.
I love when you ask if different social situations have context, this actually got me thinking about my personal method of masking, by sophomore year in high school I would spend a month or two observing a group of people I had begun spending time with, creating a sort of separate mask for each group. I would watch them interact like a scientist might watch a group of animals, then I would increase my interaction because I was determined to be normal and have friends and be acceptable, the advantage was I seemed sort of like a social butterfly, the disadvantage was that if people from two or more groups were suddenly in the same place my brain would short-circuit and I would stop being vocal. The other one that caught my attention, I had totally forgotten that sometimes as a kid I would build with legos or k'nex, other times I couldn't handle the jumble of colors and shapes in one box so I would sit down and spend hours sorting by shape, size, and color. K'nex were my favorites because the different shapes and lengths were color-coordinated.
My psychology peeps have danced around the word autism because I’ve already been diagnosed with Tourette’s and anxiety, but I’ve been reading and writing since I was three, have been obsessed with poetry and biology- since I was three, and I cannot STAND eye contact, tags, loud noises, bright lights, and denim 🤮 I know it’s bad to self diagnose, but I’ve shown all the signs and asked my therapist about it and she’s just kinda glossed over the topic- like, dude, being diagnosed with autism doesn’t suddenly make me autistic, it means I’ve already been autistic and I can get help for it now? Also, it’s not a swear word??? This has been my TED talk please come again
self-diagnosing isn’t really bad if you do your research vs reading a website on the internet and call yourself in a certain way. for what i saw, the autistic community is very open to people who discovered they are autistic with self-diagnosed, especially women, because most of the times the symptoms aren’t seen by caregivers and they only get an official diagnosis in adulthood. i recommend you doing lots of research, through videos, community, documentaries and books and when you’re sure about it and have financial stability to pay for the diagnosis then go for it. at least that’s what i’m doing now. but don’t give up on yourself, you are the only one who can understand yourself better!
bro SAME my therapist told me i dont look autistic anf just swapped it under the rug. i wrote a whole A4 sheet paper (which was so full i wrote to the edge) why im weird, what symptoms i had etc. you have to change your therapist for the better trust me (said the some gal from the net lol)🥲
Another person here to reassure you that it's okay to self diagnose if you've done the research. Like you said, a piece of a paper does not make you autistic, you'd already have to be autistic. Even then, it's okay to be wrong. You need to do what you can to find the help you need in this limited world, and not self diagnosing is, a lot of the time, more detrimental than leaving it alone and putting it on the back burner. I'm currently self diagnosed and have been for a few months now, it's taken me since I first discovered that I may be autistic 10 years ago to finally admit to myself I have it. and the way I've bloomed has been phenomenal, and that's /just/ from self diagnosing. I'm hoping to find a psychologist that will listen to me, I'm making a binder full of all of the stories I have from childhood (and adulthood) that pertain to the DSM5, I highly recommend you try that too. I hope you find a psychologist that will listen to you too!
I have two younger autistic brothers and they both have different forms of it. My youngest brother is really intelligent and you would be shocked at the things he knows, his biggest problem is he can struggle to express his intelligence and can get easily frustrated when he cant get it out. I used to and still sit and be patient with him and let him tell me in his own time and he has taught me more about certain subjects than I ever learn in school.
I’m not autistic but I was so surprised when I found out that people actually played with their toys. I just set mine up and then didn’t touch them. EVER. My American girl dolls stayed in the exact same place and didn’t move unless I decided to reorganize everything.
Hi paige. I love your content but english is not my first language so it takes me a lot of time to translate the videos. I would highly appreciate it if you could enable me and many people around the globe to watch your videos with auto translated subtitles. Thank you for creating a more inclusive world
Not all aspies are alike. U mentioned "small talk". I actually dont mind small talk cuz after a while, it gets a bit lonely when nobody wants to talk to you. Makes no sense yes, but id rather force myself to chat and say dumb things than not saying anything at all. As you get older, you pay more attention to what not to say and what to say as well so you dont upset anybody
@@lacvna. i jus feel sometimes us aspies have to go outside our comfort zones...its difficult! But if u want to get anywhere in life, u gotta go a bit outside the box
I wasn’t diagnosed with formerly known Aspergers Syndrome until I was 24 because I was one of the rare boys who was able to mask my traits by observing other people. The older I got the less traits I showed, so it got harder to diagnose me since I appeared and acted neurotypical. Nowadays, I believe autism is a strength and I use it to my own advantage when it comes to achieving my ambitious goals in life. Going to be 35 in 2 months and I believe if I knew what I know now and how my mind works, then I would’ve achieved my best life right now, but I strongly believe it isn’t too late to live the lifestyle and become who god made you to be! 😇🙏
Glad to know you are in Canada ! I’m in the works of finally getting a diagnoses at 23 years old. I’ve been diagnosed with all sorts of anxiety disorders, depression, eating disorders, OCD. Finally found my people and can understand my self better. Unfortunate since they didn’t diagnose under 18 it costs around 3000$ to get a diagnoses and that’s with a year waitlist
I'm in a similar boat. I'm in the UK and have just been diagnosed with dyspraxia and dyslexia (as a mature student. It was a nightmare just trying to get the GP to agree to help), and currently can't afford and autism assessment it's so fustraiting. Then even after apply for an assessment it can take years for the diagnosis
Can’t I just go to my regular psychiatrist for a diagnosis? Does the psychiatrist have to refer a person to a different program for assessment? Is diagnosis a different specialty within psychiatry that my psychiatrist who prescribes my medications might not have? I’m in Ontario.
I used to take those Buzzfeed quizzes where you had to identify what emotions people were feeling just based of their eyes over and over again until I got 100% so I could understand faces and thought it was totally normal 😂 so now I can identify people’s emotions based on their eyes and change my eyes to express emotions better which is great during quarantine and we’re all wearing masks lmao
I was diagnosed at age 4 in the early 90s at the time it was called asperger’s syndrome. Girls get diagnosed later than boys because they mask and develop social skills faster than boys. My experience being autistic is having a long term memory, average IQ, hyper focus, zone in and out, sensitive to bright lights, loud noises, and stimming.
Stimmin, no eye contact , hate people , hate eveytging , always angry, but obsess over one thing , eat one type of food , light sensitivity , not liking people who disagree etc
OMG WAIT I WAS OBSESSED WITH ANATOMY AS A KID!!! I had this little anatomy textbook that I got when I was 8 and I wouldn't go anywhere without it for probably a year or two. I read it cover to cover and back again and memorized several pages of it. My parents didn't even have to give me The Talk cause I just learned about it scientifically. And then growing up I never understood why other kids thought certain body stuff was weird or gross cause I was just like "uhh it's science"
Hey Paige! I'm a pediatrician from Canada (I went to McMaster too!) Great job explaining the diagnosis of autism :) This is a great video for young people who want to understnad what autism is and the spectrum of it, and you do a great job normalizing talking about it! So nice to see young patients who get involved in their health and advocate/spread awareness.
This reminded me of watching my son grow from a toddler into a child, and it really made me smile, recalling how awesome it has been to get to know him. You have a gorgeous brain.
i finally got my parents to understand that i could have adhd or be autistic, but it’s hard because my parents’ understanding of being neurodivergent is based on stereotypes and stuff that was outdated years ago. it doesn’t help that my dad and brother are both autistic and fit the stereotypes, so they think that autistic people only act like them. i feel like i’ve subconsciously spent my entire life changing my behavior to be socially acceptable and so i seem neurotypical, but i feel like doing that has been draining me for years and i just want to be understood and seen as the person that i am. but i’m also scared to try and get a diagnosis because i think that the doctors won’t believe me and they’ll think that i’m just trying to excuse my bad grades or something. i wish that the adults in my life paid more attention to me as a child, and then maybe i would’ve been diagnosed sooner
oh wow that seems scary :( well whenever im in doubt i make a list, perhaps you can do the same? prepare for every argument and stereotype they they could throw at you, discuss why they are right or wrong, and show them how serious you are about this. if worse comes to worse, you could even just hold out till youre old enough to get diagnosed yourself?
my parents never even questioned it. and i am too scared to mention it because they might think i am being narcissistic. i used to think they were unpredictable with their reactions but uh i think i’m learning maybe they aren’t the problem… but i am also mad because when i was nine i used to be so awful with social everything and instead of maybe taking me to a therapist they wanted to send me to boarding school. i never realized that something could really be wrong and now that i see it i feel indignant that instead of trying to understand and get help they wanted to send me away. to be fair i was always throwing tantrums for oddly specific reasons and i just was socially that one weirdo. now i am an extrovert with a ton of friends but deep down i feel like the same person.
idk if im autistic or not, but even if i am, i dont think theyll accept it. cuz media only shows abt stupid boys (with all f-'s) who likes nothing but trains, and they are nice to everyone, not like "PFFT, HE STUPID" in public, but they just think of it as an offensive term and i honestly thought ppl would get offended too. now ik its not offensive, just dont see them that all they are :) edit: my parents are supportive, dont take this the wrong way pls
Your sunglasses story made me break out crying. It’s exactly what I went through when I was 12. I really appreciate your videos, thank you 🖖🏽 Discovering that I’m autistic these past years has been lifting a big weight off my chest and healing my heart.
S O When i was like 5 or 6 years old, a close friend that was a psiquiatrist told my mum: "Hey, your girl here, have many aspects and behaviors that could show that she might be autistic" And my mum didn't do shit about it (Don't be mean with my mum, we live in a country that still thinks Psicologists are not necesary) So I can relate to a lot of those things, and very very very very hard..? So Idk if im or im not autistic Im kinda having a breakdown Edit: i watched Toy Story 2 like 32 times in one day when i was like 9 to memorice it and i can recite it too
this is literally me by instead of someone telling my mum she already knew as one of our family friends has it but she didn't bother either she told me a few months ago when i talked to her about it and she was like oh i wasn't concerned enough about it
if you’re an adult try getting an official diagnosis by yourself when you’re financially stable enough to pay for it, if you’re a minor then wait to be an adult and in the meantime do your research so you can enter this community. good luck
This is the video that put me on the path to discovering I am autistic. 6 months ago, I had no idea all the difficulties I've had my whole life were due to being autistic. It ALL makes sense now! Thank you so much Paige, this video change my life for the better!
Wow. I saw this on my recommend feed, decided to give it a go, and SO glad I did. First of all, I was diagnosed with the syndrome formerly known as Aspergers (now ASD) exactly 10 years ago. Alot of questions were answered at that point for sure. Despite the term alteration, I still consider myself an "Aspie". And, I still seem to be discovering quirks of mine that fall under the autism umbrella. Your presentation here was absolutely brilliant. I love your spunk, charm, manner of speaking..not to mention humor. About people/ friends..well... I couldn't handle a bunch of friendships either. Not only am I lousy at multi-tasking, the same goes for multi-people-ing hehe (NO offense to all the wonderful, sweet, kind folks out there! It's me not them! Well, certain people can be scum too) . I don't have actual physical friends, and while I enjoy my solitude, I definitely wouldn't mind one or two close companions to spend time etc. Being introverted, shy, unemployed and living with family..aren't exactly conducive to forging genuine friendship. I have my share of virtual pals (thank you internet)..and I suppose it's tiding me over until I establish my actual "niche" in life. I (and my family) have found out that waiting lists for state services/programs do indeed make you wait. lol Also since my autism co-exists with anxiety.. that leads to more issues, affecting stuff such as driving..which I don't do at all. Anxiety on top of autism can be similar to gas on a fire. ( am on medication, which does take the edge off the real bad days) But this covid social distancing thing..I may have a market cornered on that LOL. But yeah, I too prefer structure, routine.. I get easily overwhelmed, am prone to sensory overload, have difficulty processing spoken words sometimes, also not the most coordinated (or fastest) person on the planet. Due to my age, there are still those who insist autism magically goes away once you hit adulthood. There's the myth that we lack empathy. Another thing that needs to be dispelled. Empathy is something I don't lack. So you're a math whiz, I cannot say the same for me :) Ask me to spell something or locate a country and I probably won't let you down. Well I better let my rambling stop before I break the comment section! geez. if this is read, thanks so much. Looks like your sub counter is going up one :)
that’s why i grew up having a special interest for psychology and i still have it. it’s the only way for me to understand why people behave in a certain way and make sense out of it. otherwise i would be completely lost. thanks for explaining the criteria and talking about your experience. i discovered i’m autistic a year ago but i still have to get an official diagnosis (money problems). i hope in the near future i could finally get one 🤞🏻
Do you also use for example MBTI, big five or alike to help understand how people think? I was obsessed with MBTI for years to better understand people and their motivations. A whole new world opened up. Still one of the tools I keep in my back pocket. ☺️
Most of my special interests over the years and to this day have been involved with understanding people and myself. History, mythology, sociology, psychology, neurology, brain chemistry and the mechanisms of actions of certain medications.
That bit about not needing a lot of friends struck home with me. I can count my close friends on one hand. I've come to realize that the Neurotypical need to have lots of friends is (to them) a reflection of their own self worth. The more friends they have, the better they feel about themselves. Personally I believe in quality over quantity. I'd rather have 3 really good friends that I understand and who understand me than 30 friends I barely know and who never contact one another.
I'm neurotypical, hate small talk and don't need a lot of friends I'm just really introverted lol. I am also pretty sensitive to sound and struggle socially. How you differentiate autism from introversion?
I know there are topics you are not supposed to discuss while someone is eating. But they seem to be different for everyone! People are so complicated, when I am around some that I don't know super well, I just never talk. Not a quality fix, but you can't say something wrong that way... Great video, I hope you'll do many more! I really like your voice :D
neurotypicals somehow all know those imaginary social rules without even having to try, judge me because i dont magically know too, but never explain them when i break them. so stuff neurotypicals, ill act however i want lmao
I study psychology and have read the DSM-5 criteria hundreds of times, yet I always had difficulties differentiating between autism and adhd if someone just said the word. Yeah, after thinking about it I could tell what is what, but I did have difficulties. After watching your video everything is much clearer - thank you
I have read these over and over and over again both for uni and to understand myself better. but I've learned so much more about myself only by you reading and giving examples! Thank you!
I got diagnosed about a month ago (I’m 20) and I am obsessed with Economics. Just figured it was a special interest but your comment on having humanities based special interest to understand people better makes so much sense!
One of my best friends of a decade has autism. Five years into our relationship, he told me he has "slight autism". I always figured he was a little weird which is great, I am a little weird (with ADHD). I have always attributed some of his social interactions with "autism" but never really understood what autism was. He and I don't really talk much about our brains and how they function differently than neuro-typical brains and are fine friends just as we are. Thanks for this video. It helps me understand a bit more.
my best friend was recently diagnosed with autism and this video is an invaluable resource. i always had trouble understanding the way autism affects processing of situations and scared that i could unintentionally make her uncomfortable or feel hurt by things she doesn't even realise could appear cold to non-autistic people but this has really helped me... thank you so much for spreading information! hopefully i can be a more accomodating and informed support to her ♡
not that i’m holding back tears at work because MEEEE. i used to have an unhealthy obsession with taking our dishwasher detergent liquid that was lemon scented and just HUFF that stuff.
I was 15 when I got my diagnosis too!!! Also thank you soooo much! Your Chanel has helped me so much. I can’t even explain how much you helped me throughout my autism journey ♥️♥️♥️
I'd honestly love to watch a video of tips for romantic relationships. Like, friendships are hard and long term relationships just feel so strange to maintain sometimes. Would love to hear your experiences?
The connectivity theory in the brain is the most eye opening thing I have ever heard. It makes so much sense why the music part of my brain is so strong.
My mother is a retired special ed teacher. I have been volunteering at the Special Olympics with her since I was a small child, and I have been coaching for Special Olympics Missouri since I was in my early 20s. I have seen a lot of truly debilitating disabilities in my day. I've seen a lot of disabled people who are INSPIRATIONS... and I've seen a lot that are in fact so unfortunate and live lives of such sorrow, difficulty, and otherness that it's hard to draw inspiration at all... I do my best to not pity them, but some people's circumstances are just so dependent, so limited, so underequipped... and they live lives of nonstop confusion and difficulty all day every day... and they KNOW that not only do they not get to make most decisions for themselves now... but they NEVER WILL. They will NEVER leave this state of utter subordination and need, and it's simply impossible (as an able-minded, able-bodied person) not to pity them and feel PROFOUNDLY sorry for them. Now I look at you... a pretty, charismatic, healthy, influential, young, privileged, wealthy, independent, blonde haired, bright blue eyed, white woman with "1.1 million followers" on a competitive platform (Competing in social media is a highly complex endeavor that is well beyond the abilities of most able-minded people, even in your age group)... and your first thought is to highlight your disability? Because you don't like a hair on your nose? Got news for you. You are NOT disabled. There are ZERO truly disabled people in this world that can do what you do. You are COSPLAYING as a disabled person. Go to the Special Olympics sometime, and you'll see what disabled is! Spoiler Alert: It doesn't look like... "I don't like stray hairs on my body" I, personally think your diagnosis (If it ever happened at all) was a means to an end for parents or a teacher that wanted to medicate you. I've seen it happen literally hundreds of times. If you think that a disabled person can be capable of the competent management of your image, persona, social networking, and monetization/promotional use of these things... you have no reverence for the institution of disability. You... are about as able as they come, and it sickens me that you would assume this "mentall illness" victim role as a tool to bolster your points. This is disgusting. Truly. You are APPROPRIATING "mental illness" while you DRAW BENEFITS from your clear able-mindedness.
@@belladanger6907 Even if she's really autistic (which I doubt) it's CLEARLY not severe enough to be woven into her identity. Put it this way. I have enough Native American blood (Mestizo) to qualify for grants and even share in a reservation, but I claim neither of these rights... and I identify as white. Why? Because I have NOT suffered as a minority (even though I technically qualify). My mother is white enough that I don't appear outwardly Native American or Hispanic. Only one person my entire life has ever identified me as Native American from my appearance, and it was a stage makeup person. They said, "Hey, you have high cheekbones. You're Native American, aren't you?" I suppose that's the kind of thing a makeup person might notice more than most, but in any case, that's the extent of my Native American identity. One person in my entire life has been able to identify me as such. So COULD I say I'm Native American, and would it technically be true? Yes... but it's also disrespectful of people with REAL or OUTWARDLY OBVIOUS ties to the race if I were to co-opt the identity without a meaningful share in the hardships that come with it. So take a look at this girl. If she's autistic, she is BARELY on the spectrum. It is DISRESPECTFUL to real victims of the disorder for her to identify as such and claim victimhood status. I have known dozens of non-verbals with autism. Plenty autistic retarded. Plenty with facial ticks. Plenty with eating disorders. Plenty with communication deficiencies. I have seen every inch of this "spectrum" and let me tell you something... She does NOT have a meaningful share of the hardships that come with autism. Her claiming the victim status that comes with autism is frankly disgusting. It's narcissism. It's irreverence for those who are REALLY affected. This is like getting your tonsils removed and calling yourself an amputee. She is WAAAAY too functional on too many axes to be calling herself autistic... and then she pulls a piece of hair off her nose and she's like, "See... there's my autism flaring up again" FFS... you want a disrespectful depiction of autism, congratulations... there it is. The one disrespecting autism is the one who gets an annoying hair somewhere on her body and calls it autism. I can't even think of anything more deprecating of autistic people than to invoke the work autism for something so trivial.
I'm so happy I found your channel, my younger brother is autistic and this really helps me to understand autism and most importantly my little brother.
this makes me want to get a professional diagnosis cause i relate to a lot of these but i don’t want to self diagnose. alsoooo i’m a new subscriber. thank you for your educational content🥺
Thank you so much for this video! I'm neurotypical and never really knew what autism was. That might sound silly, but what I mean to say is that most of the conversations/information I would encounter about autism (yes, even the internet!) always felt like they were incredibly stereotypical, not from autistic individuals, or they were very medical but difficult to understand for people that were not familiar with medical jargon. People have always condensed it as being "abnormal" or "weird" as if that's helpful at all to understand what goes on in the mind of someone who is autistic, or to understand why there's a spectrum at all for it. This was so illuminating and easy to understand, and quite frankly, an amazing resource. Just hearing you describe what it is alone makes it so clear how ableist the language and conversation about autism typically is-- so many explanations and resources are completely devoid of the nuance you provided. Anyway. All this to say, this was wonderful and I hope it reaches anyone who has ever had any questions about this condition!
I’m 18, I found out I’m autistic this past summer, apparently I got diagnosed when I was 3, and I really just didn’t know, I found out because of a show my family was watching and being just like the young autistic kid, I brought this up to my mother and she expressed that I’m not a lot like that kid, but that I am autistic. Because of my personal brain functions, I struggle with most social interactions, I also quickly attach to people but struggle to express that. I relate to your story and appreciate you so much, you’re awesome and I only learned of your existence from Kristina’s video, I’m so grateful for someone like you... because you’re someone like me, and so... yeah... I don’t know, point is, same, and you’re awesome. Though I care a lot about making friends personally, though I’m quite sh*t at it, and because of my mental struggles I also can’t maintain them. But yeah, so, also love your top, it’s very cute.
My biggest special interest is in psychology, specifically mental disorders. I’ve always loved reading about different ways the brain can work and comparing it to neurotypical brains to see how they are different. I think it’s my way of rationalizing how my brain is different. I could talk for hours about different brain disorders. So I started learning about autism along with this, because I needed another brain condition to learn about. Every time I’d read something, I’d be like “oh cool I’m like that too”. I did this for years and not ONCE did I think “hm maybe I have autism” until I went through online quizzes that were like “how autistic are you” (btw don’t always trust those they’re dumb. It just got the gears turning in my head). Now I have to talk to my therapist to see how I could go about getting a diagnosis, because I absolutely have autism😅
I have known my son was autistic since he was one. But because people have a certain idea of how autism is supposed to be or look they also would get upset as if I was telling them something was wrong with him. People constantly argued with me and told me I was wrong and that he would "grow out of it" and to "leave it alone". I have never once looked at it as a negative. I just wanted to make sure I got him the help he needed and was understood as soon as possible. Especially wanted to make sure his grandparents understood him because they spend a lot of time with him. A lot of people thought he was just acting out about little things and being a "brat" and I wanted to make sure they understood the difference and approached him with the patience and care he needed. I was indeed right and he is amazing in every way. A literal gift. The fact that people want to cure autism or view it as such a negative thing is baffling. I wouldn't change him for the world. Yes, he is different but he is so so special and a person above all.
@paigelayle Some of the stuff you mentioned in this video & hearing your personal experiences is stuff I relate to 100%! One thing kinda relating to the box thing for me is popping bubble wrap. Although I'm very hypersensitive to loud noises like this, it's was super fun for me! Also, I'm really glad to see you doing more RUclips videos about autism this year. I can't wait to see even more in the future. 😊💜👏
so, i’m 24, i’ve always knew that i was “different” from others, i’ve never been properly diagnosed, but lately i’ve been learning about autism because i thought “well maybe”, so i was kind of in denial i guess, because i know self diagnose it’s not great, so i wanted to learn about it before coming to a psychologist and be like “i am autistic”, but seeing this video, the way she explains it and everything she talks about i relate so much, maybe not exactly everything but a lot of things, seeing this i realized that there’s a high probability that me and my niece are autistic, and i’m so thankful for this information, this gave me direction and maybe an answer of why am i the way i am, all of my struggle in life finally has an answer, i will go to a psychologist as soon as i can to get a proper diagnosis but this already helped me so much!! 💗💗
Hello! I’m trying to self diagnose myself because I think I might have autism of some kind. I’m still learning and I follow another RUclipsr. This video was so interesting and I can’t wait to learn more. Thank you!
U can do some more reading as well and take online assessment. My suggestion is first u should list out your autism traits so that u dont get mixed up with other’s stories! dont go to hard on you! I did suspect myself as autism just by watching Paige tiktok post on autism in famale(i don’t remember the title). luckily I did get my diagnosed. Good luck to u. If u have a chance and opportunity go for official diagnosis with that u can also receive help :D
@@sarah3412 can you explain the process of getting a diagnosis? because i suspect i have autism and adhd and i’m currently doing some research on it to just be as sure as possible but i just want to see if i’m right and to get some closure and answers (and also for my mom to stop calling me crazy)
@@rllyrhiya i cannot speak about how to be diagnosed in general. But i can share my experience. But here it is too public. 😅😅 maybe u can find me on Twitter? Dm me @mainvocaltrash
I am so happy that i have found your channel! I feel almost exactly the same way as you about relationships and people used to make me feel horrible for that, as if i was a bad sociopath. You managed to put my feelings into words an helped me to feel better about myself, and i am really grateful for that!
I love how she said she went in to and thought they would say she had depression, anxiety and OCD. I have been diagnosed with depression anxiety OCD and an "odd personality". Hmmm? 🤔
I'm sat here like.... oh. The thing about having special interest in history, or memorising a whole film script, or eating a whole tomato, or cutting the labels out of all my clothes... I am FLOORED. Because that's me too! You are perhaps the most relatable youtuber I've ever come across, which is strange for me because until recently I thought I might have ADHD. This time about five months ago I didn't even think I was ND, but I'm getting more sure all the time. Perhaps my ADHD assessment may point me in a different direction, if this video is anything to go by. Thank you xx
This makes so much as to why I've always been interested in philosophy, psychology and history. Reading the statistics in psychology helps me make sense of a lot.
I can't even begin to explain how much this has helped. My daughter is 11 years old and was tested at the age of 5 when she was held back a year from kindergarden for testing. She was not diagnosed at the time and was told she just had developmental delays. I have been fighting to have her retested for almost 2 years now and they are beginning her re testing this spring as there is a long wait list here (We live in a remote location). Going through the DSM-5 for ASD and every single category I can name numerous things that they would call "deficits" but I don't like using that word as deficit makes me think it's something wrong with her. So many things you spoke about when talking about your own traits and experiences I began to laugh and at times cry because that's exactly my daughter! As a mom who is trying her best to fight and advocate for her daughter, THANK YOU! You made so many things so much clearer and assured me I am on the right track for whats best for my little girl
The more I watch this the more I wonder if I'm on the autistic spectrum. This was way more informative than any article online. Amazing video. Thanks for sharing!
I would like to thank you for your vulnerable videos. My 11 year old son is autistic. I always wondered if I was till I had him. If he was "high functioning autistic" then there was no way I was too... until I saw your videos that were posted on facebook... I was assessed three weeks ago and received my diagnosis of ADHD, ASD, OCD, and Chronic Anxiety. I found out that my fibromyalgia may not even be fibromyalgia but more so that I carry my anxiety so strongly in my physical body that it causes widespread pain. I thought you had to be a super clean person to be OCD. Nope! So much of my life makes sense now! I feel like we are similar though in the sense that I too am too autistic to fit in with NT people and too high functioning to fit in with Autistic people. Your video changed my whole perspective of myself. I am so grateful that you are willing to be so vulnerable.
My parents tell me to look at a person while I talk or I'm being talked to so many times, and I really try, but I end up staring weirdly and without noticing, I'm staring at the floor again.
I really, really appreciate this! I'm AFAB/fem and was diagnosed with autism at 8 years old, but my parents didn't think autism was a real thing, so I didn't ever get to hang out with other autists growing up This is so well explained and so relatable! I have not come out to my partner about being autistic yet because I **hate** the stereotypes and assumptions... Though I do describe symptoms and challenges as I go through them... but if I ever do decide to tell him the name of the "disorder" I refer to without ever saying them name, I will totally show him this video first because I feel like it's the explanation that most fits who I am... even down to the eye makeup! I used to do my eyeshadow just like yours is in this video!!! Anyways, I wish there had been someone like you I shared a class with when I was in school... we probably would have never talked since I pretty much only spoke to students if they came up and talked to me first, but at least I would have seemed less like the one weird alien in school! lol In some of the stuff you were saying, you seemed to be describing "scripting" which in this context is when an autistic person plans what they are going to do, say and feel before doing it... I wondered if you knew that term, because I found it super helpful when I learned it :) There are a bunch of awesome autism groups on Facebook... I highly recommend joining some since they have a lot of terminology that applies to us Cheers! & Thanks for representing us so well!
I'm really glad that I found this video. I wasn't diagnosed with ADHD until I was 22 and at the time I wanted my Dr to assess for autism. He told me that 'I didn't have it because I'm too good at making eye contact/talking', and this is right after I told him that I've been an actor for 10 years. I also dealt with a lot of emotional abuse growing up and now that I'm doing better at processing that constant childhood trauma I'm noticing ways that I display autism now and remembering ways that I used to display it as a kid. I'm definitely going to write down some notes and personal experiences to talk with my doctor about it at my next session.
Also, with the facial expressions thing, did it take anyone else a VERY long time to learn what the different emojis meant? I still have trouble and simply avoid using the ones that I'm unsure of
OH MY GOD i love the fact that you’re so positive and energetic and watching your videos actually make my mood improve a lot, so even i had no interest in autism before NOW IM TOTALLY INTERESTED AND IM GONNA WATCH ALL OF YOUR VIDEOS GIRL YOU’RE AMAZING
Thank you for this video! I relate to the sensory issues and strict routine aspects of autism, but I don't think I'm autistic because I can understand social norms and nonverbal cues. However, sometimes I have issues making friends, or I feel like an outsider in group settings, and many people have described me as "very particular". My sensory issues and need for consistency heavily impact my life and well-being, but I haven't found the correct label for what is going on. I know that my experiences are valid and that I don't need a label to confirm that I'm neurodivergent. Still, I'm wondering if anyone has similar experiences, and if so, what are you diagnosed with (if anything)?
Before I realized I was autistic, I related to every single aspect of it except the social cue stuff. I put off diagnosing myself with it for years because of that, until I looked a bit deeper and realized I was actually just really good at understanding that stuff because I’d put SO MUCH effort into trying to learn it, since it didn’t initially come naturally to me. It often does now, but that’s only after years of practice and analysis and fixation on it. I’d had the mask on for so many years that I’d even fooled myself. But when I realized that social stuff just comes naturally to allistic people and doesn’t actually require all the work it did for me, I knew I was autistic. Idk if you relate to any of that at all; if not, it’s possible you have some combination of other disorders, like OCD and SPD (sensory processing disorder).
I’ve found your channel and love it... my daughter has autism but we’re in the process of getting a referral. I’m finding your videos really helpful to understand what she’s going through! 🤍💜🤍
I either stare at the floor when talking to people or stare directly into their soul. There is no in between.
YES
Same same same
I've never necessarily had a PROBLEM with eye contact like many autistic people do, I don't find it uncomfortable like they describe. However, I do find that I'm just sort of disinterested in eye contact, and also that I stare into space sometimes to focus on what someone is saying (especially if they're explaining something). I often look around their face, either at anything interesting - especially any distinct parts of their makeup, I find - or at their mouth because that's what moves when talking, you know?
@kirb e OMG THIS
My baby boy does this . Then sometimes he looks at you and it’s like he doesn’t see you.
For a long time I thought that I couldn’t be autistic because I liked small talk but then in therapy one day I was talking about how I felt like I nailed a conversation with a barista and realized that I treat it as a performance and as an actor I only liked small talk because it was an easy script 😂
This just made me crack up because i realized after reading it, that I like small talk for the same reason!! It is SO exciting when I have a perfectly executed social interaction, and I never put together that I love it because it’s like acting a part for a moment
thats such a good way to put it!! ive always hated small talk, its like being called up on stage and improvising, and for someone who's shy this becomes even more difficult. but after a LOT of masking and learning from other people/movies, ive finally become more confident and my performances have improved, and i've grown to enjoy it 😎
Wow, that's so on Point! I treat it the same! 😁
omg me
That just made SO much sense to me
Autism is so varied and I hate how people have a very strict idea of what it is and dismiss other autistics that experience the world in a completely different way of what this idea is
When people find out I’m autistic they think I’m lying cause I’m too normal. No I’m just masking.... just cause I’m not non vocal or have a noticeable stim doesn’t mean I’m not autistic. I’ll trust the doctor thanks
My mom told me that she doesn’t believe that I have autism because I don’t outwardly display the traits of it and I just- 🙄
Ikr like I have a family friend and his brother has it, people think he doesn’t have it coz he’s “too normal”
Yes such diversity in autistic experience even when so much similarity
@Philip Nguyen why "cure" something that isn't a problem?
Yes I want to see you reciting the Barbie movie
like an audiobook 🥺
Kinda want to see her stare right at the camera and recite it.
I would genuinely watch that whole video
Yes.
Omg she should so do this! Maybe on a Live or as a milestone marker, like after hitting a specific number of subs!
I was told to make eye contact then reprimanded for staring.
🤣🤣
LOL 😆
I used to enjoy writing perfectly small and straight letters at school. It helped me focus and feel good, I saw it as pretty and so mine. My tutors would tell me to write bigger and so... I started writing big fat letters like a toddler.
narcissists
Oh my god! I thought i was the only one! 😂
My husband and I watched this together. He is in the process of trying to get his professional diagnosis. Every few minutes he would pause the video and expand on his viewpoints and felt validated.
That’s beautiful
Haha I just did the exact same thing! Hope he’s gotten a lot further in his process now!!
This doc helped my son improve and get over autism with his herbs
His name is Dr Oyalo on channel
My sons speech and behavior/social skill has improved perfectly using his herbs
"you can just *tell me* how you're feeling *LIKE AN ADULT"* im WHEEZING, tell em girl
That line was genius and explains so much about my life....
Except that words aren’t the only form of human communication so those of us who are able to interpret body language and facial expressions aren’t the ones who are wrong. Plus, there isn’t anything infantile about other modes of behavior besides speech. That just sounds like sour grapes from someone who can’t process and adapt to such modes. In other words, don’t dump on other people’s ways of communicating if you don’t want to be dumped on.
I say this all the time. Also, NTs think they can tell what people are thinking/feeling by looking at them, but sadly their track record is not great. Seen so many hate each other because of false assumptions about what each other "meant" by X or Y. Maybe ask and listen. Just a thought.
@@saruhhhh your comment sounds a bit snide, but i'll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume it's a genuine question. the answer is no, it's not nearly that simple. something like 90% of human communication occurs through what we call "microexpressions." these are very small, VERY subtle hints toward someone's feelings that most neurotypical people process & understand without even realizing!! these microexpressions allow for complicated nonverbal messages such as passive aggression. these microexpressions are a form of communication that a lot of autistic people don't just innately grasp- to a neurotypical person, it might be "obvious" that their coworker is quietly peeved based on a couple of offhand comments; an autistic person might struggle to read into subtle nonverbal cues and just take the coworker's words at face value. (i.e. if he says he's "not mad at all" but his tiny microexpressions suggest otherwise, a neurotypical person vs an autistic person will probably interpret his message differently.)
honestly, even if you ONLY interact with neurotypical people EVER (which would be hard to believe), good communication can only benefit. if you're upset with someone, communicate that in a mature, straightforward way, and you'll save yourself (and everyone around you) a lot of grief.
@@kimberlyrobinson3992 you sound like someone who's never experienced the long-term effects of good straightforward communication 😂😂
broooo. The excessive eye contact. It's great in class because my teachers like that I'm paying attention, but unfortunately I'm paying so much visual attention that I process nothing they're saying. Also, I have family and partners who constantly ask me to stop staring them down when we're supposed to be having a casual conversation/hang out.
Paying so much visual attention that you process nothing they are saying. Wow thats something I never had the words for!
I do that because I’m trying so hard to pay attention or more like make it seem as though I am paying attention so that I don’t seem rude so while I can remember things easily in ways , not always during convos as most of my focus is taken up to attempt to pay attention and seem engaged rather than panicky and awkward.
Once I was thinking about eye contact so much that I started staring and my math teacher actually asked if I was ok. I was like “yep I’m fine :,D” and just stopped looking at her face at all for the rest of the conversation.
@@healthyfitfun same here
Nobody never seems to be comfortable with my intense staring of looking to the periphery of my visual field when speaking to them. I do it out of respect. Because to me staring too much or too intensley can be like the perceptive reaction of a dog or chimpanzee that is considered a threatening jesture. I feel animal like mostly. Not human so much.
Repetitive and restrictive behaviors: getting Disney plus and scrolling through all the programs and movies for hours and hours to make a complete watchlist of everything you want to see, without actually ever watching any of said programs/movies.
I do this too but all my streaming services
mecore
Wait I thought that was normal, I do that with RUclips a lot
Is this not normal 😅 I do this regularly
Haha when I visit my mother-in-law we always watch movies together. We have wildly different tastes, so picking a movie can take hours (if we even succeed), but I found that just scrolling through the movies is entertainment enough. I like to just look at them. Sometimes I imagine myself watching them. Rarely do though
It's really funny to me what you said about reading face expressions or mimics. So i am seventeen and was diagnosed with asd (my official diagnosis was asperger's but... yknw) about 8 months ago. And so when I was growing up, I was so frustated with not understanding faces that I spent years uncounsciously learning what every single little face movement meant which means that now, i can read social meaning in every slight movement and deduct what the person is thinking. I am more skilled at understing other people's emotions than NT because I've had to learn it. But now, people often get freaked out by just how much i can get in their head.
They think i'm a wizard with telepathic abilities and honestly, i'm not mad about it.
I'm 16 and I struggle to accept myself with autism. My parents don't fully understand either and its rlly mentally draining
i understand you because that’s what happened to me but i use psychology to understand people’s behaviour. i studied in high school and i’m still doing it on my own and it helped me understand people instead of being completely lost
this!! i studied body language and mimicked facial expressions in the mirror to understand people better. now i’m uncannily good at recognising patterns in people and making assumptions of their emotions and thoughts bcus of that. it freaks ppl out sometimes
I’ve done this too and I suspect that I have asd but my mum always says, ‘no you don’t because you are so good at reading emotions’ but that’s only because I’ve tried to teach myself! Omg, and I’m not even that good, it’s only with people I know that do certain things when they are having a certain emotion.
This is ME!!!!!
I think one of the things that I've been really caught up in in my journey of a potential autism diagnosis is the friend thing. I want friends. I crave friends. I want a girl group. I want to be in a group of girls who all hangs out and are all touchy and give big hugs and cuddle and watch movies and are all the cliches of TV and movies but I struggle SO MUCH. I don't know how to talk to people. I hyperfocus and annoy people. Being touched drives me nuts if I'm not comfortable with you, and then I assume all physical touch is romantic because the only person who ever touches me is my boyfriend. But I want to be social, and I want to be neurotypical and I want to have those "normal" friendships, but my brain just won't let me. Anyone else on the spectrum feel this way?
I’ve been struggling to understand how I feel and what I’m struggling with, but I completely agree with everything you said
Being touched drives me nuts cause I am asexual and autistic anyone touching me makes me angry my family won't understand , but if I am emotionally close then I touch them alot ,wtf
okay u just described me perfectly!! ahh and this makes me more enthusiastic about masking so i do it a lot and dedicate so much energy towards friends because i enjoy it so much. so if i ever run out of energy or something changes/goes wrong, im in big trouble - i will keep trying to push myself to make everyone comfortable and not worry about me because i still want to be there, but internally so frustrated with myself, being like why cant my brain just let me enjoy myself
This! Because in most my research it’s labeled as “oh you hate this or you hate that if you’re autistic” and it’s more like I don’t hate it. I want to be involved in it desperately and I like the idea of being able to do it but I just can’t and I’m horrible at it but I want to.
I can be your friend 🥺❤️❤️
I use to be so ashamed of myself for doing this but, I often live my life through tv shows, books films etc. So I will pretend to a character when I do anything for example walking my dog I always imagine I'm this other tv book or film character doing it. I always have. I can spend hours in my own head just imagining how they would live there lives.
Just found out it has a name "maladaptive daydreaming"
ME TOO OH MY GOD
@@pfftxoxo1502 I'm so glad I'm not the only one :)
OMG, I forgot how I used to do that!
SAME! i repeat watch a select few tv shows bcs i live in those worlds and feel like they’re my friends/family. makes me feel safe. i go about my day talking to them in my head
NO WAY I DO THIS TOO
Me : Man I wanna be her friend, she seems fun
Paige: I DONT NEED ANY MORE FRIENDS
😅
I'm autistic and obsessed with ethnicities, language families, etc... it gives me a feeling of understanding the human social structure. I feel like a part of a big family since I like everyone have an ethnic background lol
We are all descended from Adam and Eve. Only one Race...the Human race.
@@garseetr please don't push you beliefs on people, everyone has their own way of living life
@@garseetr WHAT ABOUT NASCAR?
ooo this makes me so happy to see because i thought i was really weird for being obsessed with these! and i feel the same way (the familial part of it)
As for language families, if you haven't already, you might wanna get yourself into Linguistics - the science/anatomy of language.
This is making me feel like I should go get tested for autism, just so I'd know. It would explain a lot. A LOT. I had to "learn" so much about how to interact with people in a "normal" way. I feel like most of my social skills were from people explaining to me how humans worked. I'm good at it, but it was never natural for me.
Same here! Most of my social skills came from SO much research/observation on the people around me like my family, classmates, and especially the shows. I’d copy their reactions and non verbal cues and practice them when I’m alone. I’d sit for hours listening to music while imagining like 30 different paths to one scenario and figure out which ones the most “natural.” I’m good at faking the conversation flow now, but it didn’t come without really hard work. I don’t want to self diagnose tho so I’ve never told this to anyone else before.
its also important to know that its not just social struggles. its also delayed walking, speach problems a a kid, sensory issues, not playing pretend and instead of playing with your toys you just brush their hair, snuff them or line them up, having obsessions with objects or subjects, needing a routine and if it changes it causes information processing overload, having trouble from going from one task to the other smoothly etc. it has to be from birth all the way up until now to be diagnosed because if its only something that developed later in life its possibly most likely anxiety or a form of ptsd. I really hope you get the answers youre looking for. i really do. i wish you all the best and i hope this information helps in some way
Same. I've related to a BUNCH of stuff she was talking about. And not just now but my WHOLE LIFE. And I think my 4yo may be on the spectrum.
I’ll probably never get diagnosed but your RUclips channel brings me comfort
You are so valid!
Same. I think I may be on the spectrum and also now my 4yo daughter.
“Boxes were the shit” * Paige and cats agreeing * 👩🏼🤝😼
For me in a a social gathering I’ll take in the situation and decide which mood, smile, voice fits but after the event I feel exhausted from having to match what is socially acceptable
and it can take anywhere between hours and days to recover
Wait what
I didn’t know that was a thing
This is an adapted introvert’s trait. You are an introvert and social interactions drain you but you “learnt” how to behave socially.
“Do social gatherings have context?” The story of my life
I never understood why I had to dress up for church as a child and still don't
@@SoraByers Same. And my cousin has nice clothes that she wears to church and school and comfy clothes she wears elsewhere... I'm like "What?!" why do you have to wear different things at different places?
It's like having to wear uniform for school because it's a "formal setting". I've always been annoyed at how most Americans can wear their own clothes to school, like why should we have to dress up to go somewhere I don't even want to be in the first place lol
It depends on the church. At many churches, they revel in being quite casual, in terms of dress.
I think I was about 14 the first time I heard people say that they act differently in different contexts, which I found very weird and confusing and my initial reaction was that they were "fake" for essentially putting on different acts depending on the situation. Turns out that's basically what you're supposed to do and I'm the weird one for always being the same 🙃
My special interests have always involved different medical conditions, disabilities, or mental disorders. I became obsessed with autism before I was diagnosed lol. I think these topics were relatable to me since I always felt different from the “typical” person. So I liked the learn about other ways people’s bodies and brains could work differently
samee
Exactly, but I’m not diagnosed and I’m scared I’m overreacting
@@thechillipizza155 same. But I’m trying to write a list to my psychologist to try and get tested atm
Does that mean it’s possible to be diagnosed with autism, or at leas autism spectrum disorder, later on in life? Because I’ve always shown symptoms of it and they started growing more and more prominent when I began puberty I think and I’ve been wondering if I really am neurotypical or not.
Same haha. I have had a lot of qualities of autism my whole life and I've always wondered if I could be autistic. But then again, it may just be anxiety and OCD (I'm diagnosed with both). Idk its so confusing.
I feel like I definitely have autism but unfortunately everyone in my life thinks that I don’t because they don’t understand how good I am at masking. I can match anyone’s personality almost immediately and I also have ALOT of the same things that you have. I have anxiety, depression and ADHD. I also am sensitive to loud noises and as a kid I wouldn’t even flush the toilet or use the blow dryer. I also HATE small talk, I don’t even know how to do it. It’s really hard for me and doesn’t come naturally at all. I’m very content not having many friends at all. I constantly question my entire existence and I just feel that I think differently from most people.
Don't claim to have autism without a diagnosis.
@@OzCroc don’t tell me what to do.
@@OzCroc hi! That’s actually a very exclusionary and privileged view :) autism diagnoses can be incredibly difficult to get and completely inaccessible for some people, e.g. due to incredibly long waiting lists in countries with free healthcare (think it’s 3 years where I live) and extortionate prices for an assessment (it’s an entire month of my salary where I live and HEllo people have bills and rent to pay).
Self-diagnoses (provided they are done with a LOT of research to back them up) have to be valid for as long as clinical diagnosis is inaccessible.
@@DoNotTestMe Yeah no. I understand that getting a diagnosis is hard, but there's no point in saying you have autism on the internet unless you actually have it. So many people don't understand what being autistic is actually like and go off stereotypes and it's frustrating as someone who is actually autistic.
@@OzCroc please prove to everyone that you have an actual diagnosis, since you've made yourself minister of who is autistic and why
I think I played pretty typically as a kid, but as an adult one of my favorite ways to feel accomplished/soothed during times of trouble is to "nest." This can look like tidying the space around me, trying to set the atmosphere in different ways like lighting or scent, and figuring out how to utilize a space the best way for me.
I can feel the satisfaction through the screen that she feels from reading those lines. Exactly what she felt and struggled with her whole life, and the validation in form of a real, acknowledged fucking diagnosis on paper that says "you are NOT 'lazy' or deliberately sabotaging your life just to piss people off after all".. it feels good even second hand. I'm glad you got the diagnosis, many lives messed up because they never find out or very late.
I love when you ask if different social situations have context, this actually got me thinking about my personal method of masking, by sophomore year in high school I would spend a month or two observing a group of people I had begun spending time with, creating a sort of separate mask for each group. I would watch them interact like a scientist might watch a group of animals, then I would increase my interaction because I was determined to be normal and have friends and be acceptable, the advantage was I seemed sort of like a social butterfly, the disadvantage was that if people from two or more groups were suddenly in the same place my brain would short-circuit and I would stop being vocal.
The other one that caught my attention, I had totally forgotten that sometimes as a kid I would build with legos or k'nex, other times I couldn't handle the jumble of colors and shapes in one box so I would sit down and spend hours sorting by shape, size, and color. K'nex were my favorites because the different shapes and lengths were color-coordinated.
My psychology peeps have danced around the word autism because I’ve already been diagnosed with Tourette’s and anxiety, but I’ve been reading and writing since I was three, have been obsessed with poetry and biology- since I was three, and I cannot STAND eye contact, tags, loud noises, bright lights, and denim 🤮
I know it’s bad to self diagnose, but I’ve shown all the signs and asked my therapist about it and she’s just kinda glossed over the topic- like, dude, being diagnosed with autism doesn’t suddenly make me autistic, it means I’ve already been autistic and I can get help for it now? Also, it’s not a swear word???
This has been my TED talk please come again
self-diagnosing isn’t really bad if you do your research vs reading a website on the internet and call yourself in a certain way. for what i saw, the autistic community is very open to people who discovered they are autistic with self-diagnosed, especially women, because most of the times the symptoms aren’t seen by caregivers and they only get an official diagnosis in adulthood.
i recommend you doing lots of research, through videos, community, documentaries and books and when you’re sure about it and have financial stability to pay for the diagnosis then go for it. at least that’s what i’m doing now. but don’t give up on yourself, you are the only one who can understand yourself better!
you should literally tell your therapist that second paragraph, like especially the last part.
That last paragraph though ✊😌
bro SAME my therapist told me i dont look autistic anf just swapped it under the rug. i wrote a whole A4 sheet paper (which was so full i wrote to the edge) why im weird, what symptoms i had etc.
you have to change your therapist for the better trust me (said the some gal from the net lol)🥲
Another person here to reassure you that it's okay to self diagnose if you've done the research. Like you said, a piece of a paper does not make you autistic, you'd already have to be autistic. Even then, it's okay to be wrong. You need to do what you can to find the help you need in this limited world, and not self diagnosing is, a lot of the time, more detrimental than leaving it alone and putting it on the back burner. I'm currently self diagnosed and have been for a few months now, it's taken me since I first discovered that I may be autistic 10 years ago to finally admit to myself I have it. and the way I've bloomed has been phenomenal, and that's /just/ from self diagnosing. I'm hoping to find a psychologist that will listen to me, I'm making a binder full of all of the stories I have from childhood (and adulthood) that pertain to the DSM5, I highly recommend you try that too. I hope you find a psychologist that will listen to you too!
I have two younger autistic brothers and they both have different forms of it. My youngest brother is really intelligent and you would be shocked at the things he knows, his biggest problem is he can struggle to express his intelligence and can get easily frustrated when he cant get it out. I used to and still sit and be patient with him and let him tell me in his own time and he has taught me more about certain subjects than I ever learn in school.
I’m not autistic but I was so surprised when I found out that people actually played with their toys. I just set mine up and then didn’t touch them. EVER. My American girl dolls stayed in the exact same place and didn’t move unless I decided to reorganize everything.
“I have like 3 friends and that’s more then enough” haha, I felt that one.
Hi paige. I love your content but english is not my first language so it takes me a lot of time to translate the videos. I would highly appreciate it if you could enable me and many people around the globe to watch your videos with auto translated subtitles. Thank you for creating a more inclusive world
i hated math i was never good at it yet when i was a child i always loved drawing i had my own cartoony unrealistic style, singing as well.
Not all aspies are alike. U mentioned "small talk". I actually dont mind small talk cuz after a while, it gets a bit lonely when nobody wants to talk to you. Makes no sense yes, but id rather force myself to chat and say dumb things than not saying anything at all. As you get older, you pay more attention to what not to say and what to say as well so you dont upset anybody
Same I don't mind it too much.
@@Lynn-ip9sh 👍. Depends also on the day and how im feeling
small talk is ok to an extent. but if im spending more than an hour with someone i either want more than small talk or nothing at all
@@lacvna. i agree!!
@@lacvna. i jus feel sometimes us aspies have to go outside our comfort zones...its difficult! But if u want to get anywhere in life, u gotta go a bit outside the box
I wasn’t diagnosed with formerly known Aspergers Syndrome until I was 24 because I was one of the rare boys who was able to mask my traits by observing other people. The older I got the less traits I showed, so it got harder to diagnose me since I appeared and acted neurotypical. Nowadays, I believe autism is a strength and I use it to my own advantage when it comes to achieving my ambitious goals in life. Going to be 35 in 2 months and I believe if I knew what I know now and how my mind works, then I would’ve achieved my best life right now, but I strongly believe it isn’t too late to live the lifestyle and become who god made you to be! 😇🙏
Ayyy similar situation here!
Can we talk ? Is there any way I can contact you ?
Fully agreed 😊
“Boxes were the SHIT” - top 10 best lines😂😂
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAAAA
oh but they WERE
Glad to know you are in Canada ! I’m in the works of finally getting a diagnoses at 23 years old. I’ve been diagnosed with all sorts of anxiety disorders, depression, eating disorders, OCD. Finally found my people and can understand my self better. Unfortunate since they didn’t diagnose under 18 it costs around 3000$ to get a diagnoses and that’s with a year waitlist
I'm in a similar boat. I'm in the UK and have just been diagnosed with dyspraxia and dyslexia (as a mature student. It was a nightmare just trying to get the GP to agree to help), and currently can't afford and autism assessment it's so fustraiting. Then even after apply for an assessment it can take years for the diagnosis
Can’t I just go to my regular psychiatrist for a diagnosis? Does the psychiatrist have to refer a person to a different program for assessment? Is diagnosis a different specialty within psychiatry that my psychiatrist who prescribes my medications might not have? I’m in Ontario.
I am about 300 km south of Abbotsford in the state capital of Washington. I am currently on the wait list in Tacoma
I used to take those Buzzfeed quizzes where you had to identify what emotions people were feeling just based of their eyes over and over again until I got 100% so I could understand faces and thought it was totally normal 😂 so now I can identify people’s emotions based on their eyes and change my eyes to express emotions better which is great during quarantine and we’re all wearing masks lmao
I feel like I should start taking these quizzes now 😂
Wait, you can change your eyes to express emotions? And other people change their eyes to express emotion?
@@cinnabonbon yes! Ever heard of smiling eyes? That's probably easier to spot
@@cinnabonbon Many cultures use them in text emoticons, and they wouldn't do that for no reason.
"I don't want to put in the effort to talk to you and hang out with you" bruh I felt that.
I was diagnosed at age 4 in the early 90s at the time it was called asperger’s syndrome. Girls get diagnosed later than boys because they mask and develop social skills faster than boys. My experience being autistic is having a long term memory, average IQ, hyper focus, zone in and out, sensitive to bright lights, loud noises, and stimming.
Stimmin, no eye contact , hate people , hate eveytging , always angry, but obsess over one thing , eat one type of food , light sensitivity , not liking people who disagree etc
I came from tiktok, I was really happy to see you made a channel! THANK YOU for doing these videos!
OMG WAIT I WAS OBSESSED WITH ANATOMY AS A KID!!! I had this little anatomy textbook that I got when I was 8 and I wouldn't go anywhere without it for probably a year or two. I read it cover to cover and back again and memorized several pages of it. My parents didn't even have to give me The Talk cause I just learned about it scientifically. And then growing up I never understood why other kids thought certain body stuff was weird or gross cause I was just like "uhh it's science"
When she said "to find out what's wrong with me" I felt that too well
Hey Paige! I'm a pediatrician from Canada (I went to McMaster too!) Great job explaining the diagnosis of autism :) This is a great video for young people who want to understnad what autism is and the spectrum of it, and you do a great job normalizing talking about it! So nice to see young patients who get involved in their health and advocate/spread awareness.
This reminded me of watching my son grow from a toddler into a child, and it really made me smile, recalling how awesome it has been to get to know him. You have a gorgeous brain.
i finally got my parents to understand that i could have adhd or be autistic, but it’s hard because my parents’ understanding of being neurodivergent is based on stereotypes and stuff that was outdated years ago. it doesn’t help that my dad and brother are both autistic and fit the stereotypes, so they think that autistic people only act like them. i feel like i’ve subconsciously spent my entire life changing my behavior to be socially acceptable and so i seem neurotypical, but i feel like doing that has been draining me for years and i just want to be understood and seen as the person that i am.
but i’m also scared to try and get a diagnosis because i think that the doctors won’t believe me and they’ll think that i’m just trying to excuse my bad grades or something. i wish that the adults in my life paid more attention to me as a child, and then maybe i would’ve been diagnosed sooner
oh wow that seems scary :( well whenever im in doubt i make a list, perhaps you can do the same? prepare for every argument and stereotype they they could throw at you, discuss why they are right or wrong, and show them how serious you are about this. if worse comes to worse, you could even just hold out till youre old enough to get diagnosed yourself?
my parents never even questioned it. and i am too scared to mention it because they might think i am being narcissistic. i used to think they were unpredictable with their reactions but uh i think i’m learning maybe they aren’t the problem… but i am also mad because when i was nine i used to be so awful with social everything and instead of maybe taking me to a therapist they wanted to send me to boarding school. i never realized that something could really be wrong and now that i see it i feel indignant that instead of trying to understand and get help they wanted to send me away. to be fair i was always throwing tantrums for oddly specific reasons and i just was socially that one weirdo. now i am an extrovert with a ton of friends but deep down i feel like the same person.
idk if im autistic or not, but even if i am, i dont think theyll accept it. cuz media only shows abt stupid boys (with all f-'s) who likes nothing but trains, and they are nice to everyone, not like "PFFT, HE STUPID" in public, but they just think of it as an offensive term and i honestly thought ppl would get offended too. now ik its not offensive, just dont see them that all they are :)
edit: my parents are supportive, dont take this the wrong way pls
"you can just tell me with your words how you're feeling.. like an adult!" SO relatable
Your sunglasses story made me break out crying. It’s exactly what I went through when I was 12. I really appreciate your videos, thank you 🖖🏽 Discovering that I’m autistic these past years has been lifting a big weight off my chest and healing my heart.
S O
When i was like 5 or 6 years old, a close friend that was a psiquiatrist told my mum: "Hey, your girl here, have many aspects and behaviors that could show that she might be autistic"
And my mum didn't do shit about it
(Don't be mean with my mum, we live in a country that still thinks Psicologists are not necesary)
So
I can relate to a lot of those things, and very very very very hard..?
So
Idk if im or im not autistic
Im kinda having a breakdown
Edit: i watched Toy Story 2 like 32 times in one day when i was like 9 to memorice it and i can recite it too
this is literally me by instead of someone telling my mum she already knew as one of our family friends has it but she didn't bother either she told me a few months ago when i talked to her about it and she was like oh i wasn't concerned enough about it
Same happened to me. I watched the Dark Knight around 100 times when I was 14, and I can recite the whole 2 hours 32 min of the movie haha
if you’re an adult try getting an official diagnosis by yourself when you’re financially stable enough to pay for it, if you’re a minor then wait to be an adult and in the meantime do your research so you can enter this community. good luck
This is the video that put me on the path to discovering I am autistic.
6 months ago, I had no idea all the difficulties I've had my whole life were due to being autistic. It ALL makes sense now!
Thank you so much Paige, this video change my life for the better!
Wow. I saw this on my recommend feed, decided to give it a go, and SO glad I did. First of all, I was diagnosed with the syndrome formerly known as Aspergers (now ASD) exactly 10 years ago. Alot of questions were answered at that point for sure. Despite the term alteration, I still consider myself an "Aspie". And, I still seem to be discovering quirks of mine that fall under the autism umbrella. Your presentation here was absolutely brilliant. I love your spunk, charm, manner of speaking..not to mention humor. About people/ friends..well... I couldn't handle a bunch of friendships either. Not only am I lousy at multi-tasking, the same goes for multi-people-ing hehe (NO offense to all the wonderful, sweet, kind folks out there! It's me not them! Well, certain people can be scum too) . I don't have actual physical friends, and while I enjoy my solitude, I definitely wouldn't mind one or two close companions to spend time etc. Being introverted, shy, unemployed and living with family..aren't exactly conducive to forging genuine friendship. I have my share of virtual pals (thank you internet)..and I suppose it's tiding me over until I establish my actual "niche" in life. I (and my family) have found out that waiting lists for state services/programs do indeed make you wait. lol Also since my autism co-exists with anxiety.. that leads to more issues, affecting stuff such as driving..which I don't do at all. Anxiety on top of autism can be similar to gas on a fire. ( am on medication, which does take the edge off the real bad days) But this covid social distancing thing..I may have a market cornered on that LOL. But yeah, I too prefer structure, routine.. I get easily overwhelmed, am prone to sensory overload, have difficulty processing spoken words sometimes, also not the most coordinated (or fastest) person on the planet. Due to my age, there are still those who insist autism magically goes away once you hit adulthood. There's the myth that we lack empathy. Another thing that needs to be dispelled. Empathy is something I don't lack. So you're a math whiz, I cannot say the same for me :) Ask me to spell something or locate a country and I probably won't let you down. Well I better let my rambling stop before I break the comment section! geez. if this is read, thanks so much. Looks like your sub counter is going up one :)
that’s why i grew up having a special interest for psychology and i still have it. it’s the only way for me to understand why people behave in a certain way and make sense out of it. otherwise i would be completely lost.
thanks for explaining the criteria and talking about your experience. i discovered i’m autistic a year ago but i still have to get an official diagnosis (money problems). i hope in the near future i could finally get one 🤞🏻
Do you also use for example MBTI, big five or alike to help understand how people think? I was obsessed with MBTI for years to better understand people and their motivations. A whole new world opened up. Still one of the tools I keep in my back pocket. ☺️
Most of my special interests over the years and to this day have been involved with understanding people and myself. History, mythology, sociology, psychology, neurology, brain chemistry and the mechanisms of actions of certain medications.
That bit about not needing a lot of friends struck home with me. I can count my close friends on one hand. I've come to realize that the Neurotypical need to have lots of friends is (to them) a reflection of their own self worth. The more friends they have, the better they feel about themselves. Personally I believe in quality over quantity. I'd rather have 3 really good friends that I understand and who understand me than 30 friends I barely know and who never contact one another.
I'm neurotypical, hate small talk and don't need a lot of friends I'm just really introverted lol. I am also pretty sensitive to sound and struggle socially. How you differentiate autism from introversion?
I know there are topics you are not supposed to discuss while someone is eating. But they seem to be different for everyone! People are so complicated, when I am around some that I don't know super well, I just never talk. Not a quality fix, but you can't say something wrong that way...
Great video, I hope you'll do many more! I really like your voice :D
I have a son who is autistic. My daughter is on the list for evaluation and I relate to SO MUCH of this! Thank you.
"Deficits in normal social communication." i.e. doesn't act exactly the way everyone else wants them to.
neurotypicals somehow all know those imaginary social rules without even having to try, judge me because i dont magically know too, but never explain them when i break them. so stuff neurotypicals, ill act however i want lmao
I study psychology and have read the DSM-5 criteria hundreds of times, yet I always had difficulties differentiating between autism and adhd if someone just said the word. Yeah, after thinking about it I could tell what is what, but I did have difficulties. After watching your video everything is much clearer - thank you
I have read these over and over and over again both for uni and to understand myself better. but I've learned so much more about myself only by you reading and giving examples! Thank you!
I got diagnosed with ASD when I was 8 and no one ever explained it to me properly so this helps a lot
I got diagnosed about a month ago (I’m 20) and I am obsessed with Economics. Just figured it was a special interest but your comment on having humanities based special interest to understand people better makes so much sense!
One of my best friends of a decade has autism. Five years into our relationship, he told me he has "slight autism". I always figured he was a little weird which is great, I am a little weird (with ADHD). I have always attributed some of his social interactions with "autism" but never really understood what autism was. He and I don't really talk much about our brains and how they function differently than neuro-typical brains and are fine friends just as we are.
Thanks for this video. It helps me understand a bit more.
ASD here. This was really really good. I am preparing to speak publicly about autism and your video really helps. Thank you. What you do is amazing :)
"i don't want to make friends, i don't care." perfect, that is exactly the type of friend i'm interested in :) i hate 'maintaining friendships'.
my best friend was recently diagnosed with autism and this video is an invaluable resource. i always had trouble understanding the way autism affects processing of situations and scared that i could unintentionally make her uncomfortable or feel hurt by things she doesn't even realise could appear cold to non-autistic people but this has really helped me... thank you so much for spreading information! hopefully i can be a more accomodating and informed support to her ♡
not that i’m holding back tears at work because MEEEE. i used to have an unhealthy obsession with taking our dishwasher detergent liquid that was lemon scented and just HUFF that stuff.
I was 15 when I got my diagnosis too!!! Also thank you soooo much! Your Chanel has helped me so much. I can’t even explain how much you helped me throughout my autism journey ♥️♥️♥️
I'd honestly love to watch a video of tips for romantic relationships. Like, friendships are hard and long term relationships just feel so strange to maintain sometimes. Would love to hear your experiences?
The connectivity theory in the brain is the most eye opening thing I have ever heard. It makes so much sense why the music part of my brain is so strong.
My mother is a retired special ed teacher. I have been volunteering at the Special Olympics with her since I was a small child, and I have been coaching for Special Olympics Missouri since I was in my early 20s.
I have seen a lot of truly debilitating disabilities in my day. I've seen a lot of disabled people who are INSPIRATIONS... and I've seen a lot that are in fact so unfortunate and live lives of such sorrow, difficulty, and otherness that it's hard to draw inspiration at all... I do my best to not pity them, but some people's circumstances are just so dependent, so limited, so underequipped... and they live lives of nonstop confusion and difficulty all day every day... and they KNOW that not only do they not get to make most decisions for themselves now... but they NEVER WILL.
They will NEVER leave this state of utter subordination and need, and it's simply impossible (as an able-minded, able-bodied person) not to pity them and feel PROFOUNDLY sorry for them.
Now I look at you... a pretty, charismatic, healthy, influential, young, privileged, wealthy, independent, blonde haired, bright blue eyed, white woman with "1.1 million followers" on a competitive platform (Competing in social media is a highly complex endeavor that is well beyond the abilities of most able-minded people, even in your age group)... and your first thought is to highlight your disability? Because you don't like a hair on your nose?
Got news for you. You are NOT disabled. There are ZERO truly disabled people in this world that can do what you do. You are COSPLAYING as a disabled person.
Go to the Special Olympics sometime, and you'll see what disabled is!
Spoiler Alert: It doesn't look like... "I don't like stray hairs on my body"
I, personally think your diagnosis (If it ever happened at all) was a means to an end for parents or a teacher that wanted to medicate you. I've seen it happen literally hundreds of times. If you think that a disabled person can be capable of the competent management of your image, persona, social networking, and monetization/promotional use of these things... you have no reverence for the institution of disability. You... are about as able as they come, and it sickens me that you would assume this "mentall illness" victim role as a tool to bolster your points.
This is disgusting. Truly. You are APPROPRIATING "mental illness" while you DRAW BENEFITS from your clear able-mindedness.
Alot of autistic people seem perfectly normal but I'm sure she struggles
@@belladanger6907
Even if she's really autistic (which I doubt) it's CLEARLY not severe enough to be woven into her identity.
Put it this way. I have enough Native American blood (Mestizo) to qualify for grants and even share in a reservation, but I claim neither of these rights... and I identify as white. Why? Because I have NOT suffered as a minority (even though I technically qualify). My mother is white enough that I don't appear outwardly Native American or Hispanic.
Only one person my entire life has ever identified me as Native American from my appearance, and it was a stage makeup person. They said, "Hey, you have high cheekbones. You're Native American, aren't you?" I suppose that's the kind of thing a makeup person might notice more than most, but in any case, that's the extent of my Native American identity. One person in my entire life has been able to identify me as such.
So COULD I say I'm Native American, and would it technically be true? Yes... but it's also disrespectful of people with REAL or OUTWARDLY OBVIOUS ties to the race if I were to co-opt the identity without a meaningful share in the hardships that come with it.
So take a look at this girl. If she's autistic, she is BARELY on the spectrum. It is DISRESPECTFUL to real victims of the disorder for her to identify as such and claim victimhood status. I have known dozens of non-verbals with autism. Plenty autistic retarded. Plenty with facial ticks. Plenty with eating disorders. Plenty with communication deficiencies. I have seen every inch of this "spectrum" and let me tell you something...
She does NOT have a meaningful share of the hardships that come with autism. Her claiming the victim status that comes with autism is frankly disgusting. It's narcissism. It's irreverence for those who are REALLY affected.
This is like getting your tonsils removed and calling yourself an amputee.
She is WAAAAY too functional on too many axes to be calling herself autistic... and then she pulls a piece of hair off her nose and she's like, "See... there's my autism flaring up again"
FFS... you want a disrespectful depiction of autism, congratulations... there it is. The one disrespecting autism is the one who gets an annoying hair somewhere on her body and calls it autism. I can't even think of anything more deprecating of autistic people than to invoke the work autism for something so trivial.
@@classyassmothafucka8890 no I get it I'm just saying it makes shit hard lol and yeah I'm Mexican but I look white so I don't really know about it
As someone who works with Autistic children, your videos are incredibly helpful and i appreciate everything you do. Love ya girl
"I think when I was younger I was taught that this is what you have to do, so this is what I'm going to frickin do." Yes!
I'm so happy I found your channel, my younger brother is autistic and this really helps me to understand autism and most importantly my little brother.
this makes me want to get a professional diagnosis cause i relate to a lot of these but i don’t want to self diagnose.
alsoooo i’m a new subscriber. thank you for your educational content🥺
Thank you so much for this video! I'm neurotypical and never really knew what autism was. That might sound silly, but what I mean to say is that most of the conversations/information I would encounter about autism (yes, even the internet!) always felt like they were incredibly stereotypical, not from autistic individuals, or they were very medical but difficult to understand for people that were not familiar with medical jargon. People have always condensed it as being "abnormal" or "weird" as if that's helpful at all to understand what goes on in the mind of someone who is autistic, or to understand why there's a spectrum at all for it. This was so illuminating and easy to understand, and quite frankly, an amazing resource. Just hearing you describe what it is alone makes it so clear how ableist the language and conversation about autism typically is-- so many explanations and resources are completely devoid of the nuance you provided. Anyway. All this to say, this was wonderful and I hope it reaches anyone who has ever had any questions about this condition!
I can’t tell you enough, of how much I appreciate your videos 💜 you’re absolutely amazing ! And making a change
I’m 18, I found out I’m autistic this past summer, apparently I got diagnosed when I was 3, and I really just didn’t know, I found out because of a show my family was watching and being just like the young autistic kid, I brought this up to my mother and she expressed that I’m not a lot like that kid, but that I am autistic. Because of my personal brain functions, I struggle with most social interactions, I also quickly attach to people but struggle to express that. I relate to your story and appreciate you so much, you’re awesome and I only learned of your existence from Kristina’s video, I’m so grateful for someone like you... because you’re someone like me, and so... yeah... I don’t know, point is, same, and you’re awesome.
Though I care a lot about making friends personally, though I’m quite sh*t at it, and because of my mental struggles I also can’t maintain them. But yeah, so, also love your top, it’s very cute.
My biggest special interest is in psychology, specifically mental disorders. I’ve always loved reading about different ways the brain can work and comparing it to neurotypical brains to see how they are different. I think it’s my way of rationalizing how my brain is different. I could talk for hours about different brain disorders. So I started learning about autism along with this, because I needed another brain condition to learn about. Every time I’d read something, I’d be like “oh cool I’m like that too”. I did this for years and not ONCE did I think “hm maybe I have autism” until I went through online quizzes that were like “how autistic are you” (btw don’t always trust those they’re dumb. It just got the gears turning in my head). Now I have to talk to my therapist to see how I could go about getting a diagnosis, because I absolutely have autism😅
I have known my son was autistic since he was one. But because people have a certain idea of how autism is supposed to be or look they also would get upset as if I was telling them something was wrong with him. People constantly argued with me and told me I was wrong and that he would "grow out of it" and to "leave it alone". I have never once looked at it as a negative. I just wanted to make sure I got him the help he needed and was understood as soon as possible. Especially wanted to make sure his grandparents understood him because they spend a lot of time with him. A lot of people thought he was just acting out about little things and being a "brat" and I wanted to make sure they understood the difference and approached him with the patience and care he needed. I was indeed right and he is amazing in every way. A literal gift. The fact that people want to cure autism or view it as such a negative thing is baffling. I wouldn't change him for the world. Yes, he is different but he is so so special and a person above all.
@paigelayle Some of the stuff you mentioned in this video & hearing your personal experiences is stuff I relate to 100%! One thing kinda relating to the box thing for me is popping bubble wrap. Although I'm very hypersensitive to loud noises like this, it's was super fun for me! Also, I'm really glad to see you doing more RUclips videos about autism this year. I can't wait to see even more in the future. 😊💜👏
so, i’m 24, i’ve always knew that i was “different” from others, i’ve never been properly diagnosed, but lately i’ve been learning about autism because i thought “well maybe”, so i was kind of in denial i guess, because i know self diagnose it’s not great, so i wanted to learn about it before coming to a psychologist and be like “i am autistic”, but seeing this video, the way she explains it and everything she talks about i relate so much, maybe not exactly everything but a lot of things, seeing this i realized that there’s a high probability that me and my niece are autistic, and i’m so thankful for this information, this gave me direction and maybe an answer of why am i the way i am, all of my struggle in life finally has an answer, i will go to a psychologist as soon as i can to get a proper diagnosis but this already helped me so much!! 💗💗
Hello! I’m trying to self diagnose myself because I think I might have autism of some kind. I’m still learning and I follow another RUclipsr. This video was so interesting and I can’t wait to learn more. Thank you!
U can do some more reading as well and take online assessment. My suggestion is first u should list out your autism traits so that u dont get mixed up with other’s stories! dont go to hard on you! I did suspect myself as autism just by watching Paige tiktok post on autism in famale(i don’t remember the title). luckily I did get my diagnosed. Good luck to u. If u have a chance and opportunity go for official diagnosis with that u can also receive help :D
@@sarah3412 can you explain the process of getting a diagnosis? because i suspect i have autism and adhd and i’m currently doing some research on it to just be as sure as possible but i just want to see if i’m right and to get some closure and answers (and also for my mom to stop calling me crazy)
@@rllyrhiya i cannot speak about how to be diagnosed in general. But i can share my experience. But here it is too public. 😅😅 maybe u can find me on Twitter? Dm me @mainvocaltrash
I am so happy that i have found your channel! I feel almost exactly the same way as you about relationships and people used to make me feel horrible for that, as if i was a bad sociopath. You managed to put my feelings into words an helped me to feel better about myself, and i am really grateful for that!
I love how she said she went in to and thought they would say she had depression, anxiety and OCD. I have been diagnosed with depression anxiety OCD and an "odd personality". Hmmm? 🤔
I'm sat here like.... oh. The thing about having special interest in history, or memorising a whole film script, or eating a whole tomato, or cutting the labels out of all my clothes... I am FLOORED. Because that's me too! You are perhaps the most relatable youtuber I've ever come across, which is strange for me because until recently I thought I might have ADHD. This time about five months ago I didn't even think I was ND, but I'm getting more sure all the time. Perhaps my ADHD assessment may point me in a different direction, if this video is anything to go by. Thank you xx
You’re so beautiful 😍 and your voice is like a Disney Princess 🥺
This makes so much as to why I've always been interested in philosophy, psychology and history. Reading the statistics in psychology helps me make sense of a lot.
I Love How, Spectrums Understand Spectrums. "On The Same Paige"
I can't even begin to explain how much this has helped. My daughter is 11 years old and was tested at the age of 5 when she was held back a year from kindergarden for testing. She was not diagnosed at the time and was told she just had developmental delays. I have been fighting to have her retested for almost 2 years now and they are beginning her re testing this spring as there is a long wait list here (We live in a remote location). Going through the DSM-5 for ASD and every single category I can name numerous things that they would call "deficits" but I don't like using that word as deficit makes me think it's something wrong with her. So many things you spoke about when talking about your own traits and experiences I began to laugh and at times cry because that's exactly my daughter! As a mom who is trying her best to fight and advocate for her daughter, THANK YOU! You made so many things so much clearer and assured me I am on the right track for whats best for my little girl
wait this is starting to be a little,,,,, TOO relatable
The more I watch this the more I wonder if I'm on the autistic spectrum. This was way more informative than any article online. Amazing video. Thanks for sharing!
Seen psychologists since I was a kid and they thought I had autism.but refused to get me tested. I relate to alot of this actually
I would like to thank you for your vulnerable videos. My 11 year old son is autistic. I always wondered if I was till I had him. If he was "high functioning autistic" then there was no way I was too... until I saw your videos that were posted on facebook...
I was assessed three weeks ago and received my diagnosis of ADHD, ASD, OCD, and Chronic Anxiety. I found out that my fibromyalgia may not even be fibromyalgia but more so that I carry my anxiety so strongly in my physical body that it causes widespread pain. I thought you had to be a super clean person to be OCD. Nope! So much of my life makes sense now! I feel like we are similar though in the sense that I too am too autistic to fit in with NT people and too high functioning to fit in with Autistic people. Your video changed my whole perspective of myself.
I am so grateful that you are willing to be so vulnerable.
My parents tell me to look at a person while I talk or I'm being talked to so many times, and I really try, but I end up staring weirdly and without noticing, I'm staring at the floor again.
I really, really appreciate this! I'm AFAB/fem and was diagnosed with autism at 8 years old, but my parents didn't think autism was a real thing, so I didn't ever get to hang out with other autists growing up
This is so well explained and so relatable!
I have not come out to my partner about being autistic yet because I **hate** the stereotypes and assumptions... Though I do describe symptoms and challenges as I go through them... but if I ever do decide to tell him the name of the "disorder" I refer to without ever saying them name, I will totally show him this video first because I feel like it's the explanation that most fits who I am... even down to the eye makeup! I used to do my eyeshadow just like yours is in this video!!!
Anyways, I wish there had been someone like you I shared a class with when I was in school... we probably would have never talked since I pretty much only spoke to students if they came up and talked to me first, but at least I would have seemed less like the one weird alien in school! lol
In some of the stuff you were saying, you seemed to be describing "scripting" which in this context is when an autistic person plans what they are going to do, say and feel before doing it... I wondered if you knew that term, because I found it super helpful when I learned it :)
There are a bunch of awesome autism groups on Facebook... I highly recommend joining some since they have a lot of terminology that applies to us
Cheers! & Thanks for representing us so well!
“I’m just so cool on my own I don’t even need friends” HAHA ME
so happy to see an autistic girl out here talking about autism and have people listen! Thank you for everything you do for our community!
thanks for the reupload, i watched until the cutoff in the original video lol
I'm really glad that I found this video. I wasn't diagnosed with ADHD until I was 22 and at the time I wanted my Dr to assess for autism. He told me that 'I didn't have it because I'm too good at making eye contact/talking', and this is right after I told him that I've been an actor for 10 years. I also dealt with a lot of emotional abuse growing up and now that I'm doing better at processing that constant childhood trauma I'm noticing ways that I display autism now and remembering ways that I used to display it as a kid. I'm definitely going to write down some notes and personal experiences to talk with my doctor about it at my next session.
Also, with the facial expressions thing, did it take anyone else a VERY long time to learn what the different emojis meant? I still have trouble and simply avoid using the ones that I'm unsure of
OH MY GOD i love the fact that you’re so positive and energetic and watching your videos actually make my mood improve a lot, so even i had no interest in autism before NOW IM TOTALLY INTERESTED AND IM GONNA WATCH ALL OF YOUR VIDEOS GIRL YOU’RE AMAZING
Thank you for this video! I relate to the sensory issues and strict routine aspects of autism, but I don't think I'm autistic because I can understand social norms and nonverbal cues. However, sometimes I have issues making friends, or I feel like an outsider in group settings, and many people have described me as "very particular". My sensory issues and need for consistency heavily impact my life and well-being, but I haven't found the correct label for what is going on. I know that my experiences are valid and that I don't need a label to confirm that I'm neurodivergent. Still, I'm wondering if anyone has similar experiences, and if so, what are you diagnosed with (if anything)?
Before I realized I was autistic, I related to every single aspect of it except the social cue stuff. I put off diagnosing myself with it for years because of that, until I looked a bit deeper and realized I was actually just really good at understanding that stuff because I’d put SO MUCH effort into trying to learn it, since it didn’t initially come naturally to me. It often does now, but that’s only after years of practice and analysis and fixation on it. I’d had the mask on for so many years that I’d even fooled myself. But when I realized that social stuff just comes naturally to allistic people and doesn’t actually require all the work it did for me, I knew I was autistic.
Idk if you relate to any of that at all; if not, it’s possible you have some combination of other disorders, like OCD and SPD (sensory processing disorder).
I’ve found your channel and love it... my daughter has autism but we’re in the process of getting a referral.
I’m finding your videos really helpful to understand what she’s going through! 🤍💜🤍