The USA Is Cooked

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  • Опубликовано: 13 дек 2024

Комментарии • 461

  • @furry_studier3097
    @furry_studier3097 5 месяцев назад +636

    3 slops in 287338 seconds, pyro stood up

    • @birdyboii420
      @birdyboii420 5 месяцев назад +5

      underrated comment

    • @Dayvly
      @Dayvly 5 месяцев назад +9

      Sloped up

    • @Whenwhereeverywhere
      @Whenwhereeverywhere 5 месяцев назад

      Slunderrated slopment

    • @ChiggaTheThird
      @ChiggaTheThird 5 месяцев назад +8

      pyro finally fills the trough for us piggies

    • @si.ari.06
      @si.ari.06 5 месяцев назад

      ​@@Dayvly📈?

  • @arsehair8105
    @arsehair8105 5 месяцев назад +569

    10mins to get through 2mins of the video I can’t.

    • @mirrorhymn
      @mirrorhymn 5 месяцев назад +64

      21 minutes into the vod and he's still at the 5 minutes mark

    • @neonpunk5979
      @neonpunk5979 5 месяцев назад +76

      Bro is sidetracked more constantly than a baby on an ipad

    • @gilbert_shork3338
      @gilbert_shork3338 5 месяцев назад +11

      @@neonpunk5979 real as fuck

    • @pog7126
      @pog7126 5 месяцев назад +18

      Just watch the original video

    • @Gabriel_Ultrakill
      @Gabriel_Ultrakill 5 месяцев назад +2

      Yeah....I can't either....I'll just wait quietly for darkwood

  • @ziphy_6471
    @ziphy_6471 5 месяцев назад +468

    WHAT THE FUCK IS A KILLOMETER!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅

    • @lockerbuddy2039
      @lockerbuddy2039 5 месяцев назад +7

      Kill-O-meaters?! Queed?? Tesco???
      Tell it to me in freedom units

    • @apchistuz
      @apchistuz 5 месяцев назад +5

      1 kilometer is equal to 1093.613 American yards

    • @ziphy_6471
      @ziphy_6471 5 месяцев назад +1

      @@apchistuz GOD BLESS AMERICA ! 💥💥💥💥🦅🦅🦅🦅

    • @apchistuz
      @apchistuz 5 месяцев назад +3

      @@ziphy_6471 glad I've educated you guys

    • @ziphy_6471
      @ziphy_6471 5 месяцев назад +1

      @@apchistuz FREEDOM UNITS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • @Not_Dashy
    @Not_Dashy 5 месяцев назад +322

    London is a gmod dark rp server

  • @BrogieSmells
    @BrogieSmells 5 месяцев назад +45

    “You watch a RUclipsr for longer than 2 months crazy” *me being 24 and having watched pyro since middle school*

  • @pozhar3287
    @pozhar3287 5 месяцев назад +23

    15:51
    "vagina has more- virginia has more miles of the alopecian trail than any other state"

  • @garretthberne3035
    @garretthberne3035 5 месяцев назад +128

    Literally Place, Sweden for 60 minutes. Bro can't stop yapping.

    • @flarflecakes
      @flarflecakes 5 месяцев назад +4

      bro speedran the video

    • @hansum_AWP
      @hansum_AWP 5 месяцев назад +3

      I bet pyro gonna upload a video about "Sweden is cooked" and would yap about for about 24 hours+

    • @nationalnewschannel8241
      @nationalnewschannel8241 5 месяцев назад

      I honestly just love it when Europeans try to criticize America I’ll accept criticism when you don’t come crying to us for help after every single conflict, or look at us like it’s our job to fix any problem in the world, talk to me when you don’t have to worry about getting stabbed every time you walk down the street

    • @daxfromthediamonduniverse2025
      @daxfromthediamonduniverse2025 4 месяца назад +1

      @@hansum_AWP bro predicted it

  • @vsaucelover9660
    @vsaucelover9660 5 месяцев назад +108

    The next title is going to be "my hairline is coocked"

  • @MaybeTartarus
    @MaybeTartarus 5 месяцев назад +147

    only pyro can turn a 30 minute video reaction into a 1 hour reaction slop vid by yapping

    • @00pium_Mero
      @00pium_Mero 5 месяцев назад +7

      Bro speaks yappnese

    • @Im_Jakon
      @Im_Jakon 5 месяцев назад +1

      1 and a half hour reaction

    • @peartry
      @peartry 5 месяцев назад +4

      ​@@00pium_Mero he graduated from yapologetics college

    • @thatstockin
      @thatstockin 5 месяцев назад +2

      I guess you could say… he inflated the video…

    • @SpentLast
      @SpentLast 4 месяца назад

      An hour and thirty minute video mind you

  • @ajzorger93
    @ajzorger93 5 месяцев назад +74

    In northeast Ohio, we have black squirrels. Just straight up black. And they beat up the grey ones and steal their nuts. Its wild watching.

    • @KilWilShow
      @KilWilShow 5 месяцев назад +5

      This comment removed for violating community guidelines.

    • @joselazo6840
      @joselazo6840 4 месяца назад +6

      “Despite black squirrels making only 13% of the squirrel population . . .”

    • @elektr1x7881
      @elektr1x7881 2 месяца назад

      so just canadian squirrels

    • @kale_phresch_
      @kale_phresch_ 2 месяца назад

      I can confirm I am also from the area and this is true.

  • @benne.0411
    @benne.0411 5 месяцев назад +43

    skipped to 41 minutes and he's 10 minutes into the USA video

  • @SetTheSeasAblaze
    @SetTheSeasAblaze 5 месяцев назад +70

    the USA may be cooked but atleast we know how to cook without our food looking like MREs

    • @someguy4512
      @someguy4512 5 месяцев назад

      my bro your food IS an MRE, cheese burgers that can outlive the planet, and will give you heart attacks
      also tons of sugar and transfats and other chemicals, calling American food " food " is a far stretch on its own

    • @Gabriel_Ultrakill
      @Gabriel_Ultrakill 5 месяцев назад +4

      You may be cooked but at least not UK

    • @jazg275
      @jazg275 5 месяцев назад +9

      Hell yeah bruther 🇺🇸🦅🇺🇸🫡💅🏽. Beans and toast for breakky is nasty work

    • @SetTheSeasAblaze
      @SetTheSeasAblaze 5 месяцев назад +2

      @@jazg275 you know whats up

    • @nationalnewschannel8241
      @nationalnewschannel8241 5 месяцев назад +3

      I mean, we may be cooked but damn I love my rights

  • @amiralieghdamian5168
    @amiralieghdamian5168 5 месяцев назад +12

    Pyro streams feel like family guy episodes, full of cutaways

  • @slotzoffuntrue
    @slotzoffuntrue 5 месяцев назад +18

    > Is Marylander by birth
    > Maryland comes up
    > Gets excited
    > Just Baltimore again
    Why do I even bother

    • @krekpodzol4069
      @krekpodzol4069 5 месяцев назад +2

      Relatable

    • @mchamburgerslice2870
      @mchamburgerslice2870 3 месяца назад +2

      Me as a native Pittsburgher when Pennsylvania comes up and only Philly is mentioned

  • @Anonymous-to6fn
    @Anonymous-to6fn 5 месяцев назад +112

    “I don’t get why there’s no public transport in America”
    America: 3,809,525 square miles, 47 percent of which is unoccupied💀
    Let’s make this simple for you guys. American does not run on a communist system meaning the government is not nearly as well funded. States are granted the power to decide if they want public transport as that is not an option that should belong to the federal government, BUT this usually depends on federal funding depending on how rich/poor the state is. After WW2 the idea of the nuclear family and suburban living was exploding, creating a car culture as people wanted to move away from the city and live in quiet suburbs or rural areas. Public transport is not cheap since one US state is as big (if not bigger) than an average European country, therefore public transport across the country is a ridiculous idea. If you believe that your city could benefit from public transport, then it is YOUR responsibility as a functioning citizen to bring that to your local governments attention. The beauty of being an American is having the power to tell your government what YOU want from them as a citizen.

    • @SamFromItalia
      @SamFromItalia 5 месяцев назад +18

      Individual cities have public transport because making any solid nation wide public transit would cost an ungodly amount of money.

    • @georgec9384
      @georgec9384 5 месяцев назад +18

      @@SamFromItaliapublic transport sucks in cities too tbh. If they made at least city wide public transport good no country can talk

    • @wheezer6695
      @wheezer6695 5 месяцев назад +6

      ​@@georgec9384The amount of urine and feces I've had waft into my nostrils on Trimet makes me hate public transpo

    • @snibbels-dr8ov
      @snibbels-dr8ov 5 месяцев назад +19

      richest nation in the world, casually spends trillions on space and military be like: THERES NO WAY WE CAN PUT SOME METAL ON THE GROUND WTF!!?!?!

    • @AaronJohnson-rs1vm
      @AaronJohnson-rs1vm 5 месяцев назад +4

      @@snibbels-dr8ovit’s easier to make some rockets then it is to place millions of tons of metal across millions of sq Miles

  • @GARGANTUAN_JAME
    @GARGANTUAN_JAME 5 месяцев назад +10

    Challenge for the 9 adult pyro veiwers: Take a shot every time he makes an unironic pop culture/tiktok/videogame reference

    • @thefan3618
      @thefan3618 5 месяцев назад +1

      You forgot that he has no adult viewers

    • @appleseinvater
      @appleseinvater 5 месяцев назад +3

      Nah I will die and shit myself

  • @52deepwoken52
    @52deepwoken52 5 месяцев назад +45

    Pyrocynical resorted to putting women on the thumbnail to increase engagement

    • @cykablyat7107
      @cykablyat7107 5 месяцев назад +6

      That’s the original thumbnail

    • @PullaWheellllll
      @PullaWheellllll 5 месяцев назад

      ​@@cykablyat7107Oh worked for me regardless!

  • @godinsurance4434
    @godinsurance4434 5 месяцев назад +4

    every time pyro holds his remote up to his face, i keep thinking he’s taking a hit from his pen

  • @mchamburgerslice2870
    @mchamburgerslice2870 3 месяца назад +1

    >Pennsylvania comes up
    >me being a Pittsburgh resident since birth getting excited
    >only Philly mentioned

  • @DrunkenMalkavian
    @DrunkenMalkavian 5 месяцев назад +7

    Spills coke all over his stuff - "lOoK wHaT yOu MaDe Me Do!"

  • @艾
    @艾 5 месяцев назад +3

    1 frame of money and he opens a new tab and starts a rant about it

  • @weedjesus5587
    @weedjesus5587 5 месяцев назад +3

    growing up in orlando i can confirm florida is just an online gta server with mods. like walking down the street you get used to the fent fold and the meth mania

  • @heinz5452
    @heinz5452 5 месяцев назад +3

    its actually crazy how pyro stretches a 30 minute video in almost an hour and a half fucking insane

  • @GodsBadAssBlade
    @GodsBadAssBlade 4 месяца назад +1

    as an american i highly dont recommend for you to hike here unless its a very well known and upkept route. otherwise youre way more likely to be mauled to death by something or get lost with no hope of recovery

  • @kaworunagisa69
    @kaworunagisa69 5 месяцев назад +7

    30 minute video turned into one and a half hour video

  • @dolliermakes9602
    @dolliermakes9602 5 месяцев назад +1

    Someone from Indiana here! Gary isn't the only terrifying thing we got here. The number of gruesome murders we have happened here is INSANE. Yet people only ever talk about the corn.

  • @a.jlewissonicski5278
    @a.jlewissonicski5278 5 месяцев назад +2

    32:11 Me when I see a sponsor hosted by your favorite RUclipsr.

  • @KingTalion
    @KingTalion 5 месяцев назад +14

    Mall: >:(
    Mall, Sweden: :0

  • @TheCutiePatrol
    @TheCutiePatrol 4 месяца назад +1

    "my coke just spilled everywhere"
    looks closer
    "yeah, it just went everywhere"
    leans a little further
    "yep, it went everywhere"
    pulls out items from under the desk
    "defiantly gone everywhere"
    yeah, most people would have cleaned it the second it happens, not pyro, he needs confirmation thats its gone everywhere lol.

  • @StrigaSlayer
    @StrigaSlayer Месяц назад +1

    as a baltimorian the accent is real

  • @ChiggaTheThird
    @ChiggaTheThird 5 месяцев назад +32

    it was funny until furry_studier3097 commented 💢

  • @boring_incarnate
    @boring_incarnate 4 месяца назад

    "I love Florida."
    Bro is gonna be DarkViper of GTA 6.

  • @chest_athletics
    @chest_athletics 2 месяца назад +1

    Fun fact new hampshire drivers/passengers don't need to wear there seatblet. They live by there moto. "Live free or die"

  • @exppalt2269
    @exppalt2269 5 месяцев назад +6

    Three times the original video length? Should've kept the video playing and left the room until the video ended

  • @艾
    @艾 5 месяцев назад +2

    "aren't u guys cash only"
    "yeah"
    "so he paid by debit card"
    bro what am i watching, this is actual brainrot

  • @TrevorLahey_69
    @TrevorLahey_69 5 месяцев назад +5

    The thing about living in Iowa is you get some peace and fucking quiet.

  • @greg5805
    @greg5805 5 месяцев назад +2

    1:46 soyden mentioned

  • @IJNAoba9-25-26
    @IJNAoba9-25-26 5 месяцев назад +2

    Only Pyro could stretch a 30 min video to an Hour and a half

  • @KuleGuy27
    @KuleGuy27 5 месяцев назад +2

    48:34 - BLADEE MENTIONED

  • @ramaleu7181
    @ramaleu7181 5 месяцев назад +2

    Love the thumbnail change

  • @idkyoursoul3609
    @idkyoursoul3609 5 месяцев назад

    as someone who goes to university in lawrence kansas its amazing. i never would think pyro would ever talk about kansas

  • @DoNotCallMyBrother
    @DoNotCallMyBrother 5 месяцев назад

    I90 & I80 are so beautiful across the country. All the planes go directly across America never over or out the way to see things.

  • @pspfilms7505
    @pspfilms7505 5 месяцев назад +2

    10:10 Nobody sent that in chat 💀

  • @jokequad8
    @jokequad8 4 месяца назад +1

    Pyro "Vaping" 35:05
    I KNOW ITS NOT A VAPE

  • @Johncenasuncle
    @Johncenasuncle 25 дней назад +1

    I grew up always seeing Amish people in their buggies thinking shit was normal lmao people go to them to buy fresh goods

  • @tnrstnrstnrs
    @tnrstnrstnrs 5 месяцев назад +1

    Pyrocynical's HAIRLINE is cooked

  • @trollingtroll3810
    @trollingtroll3810 5 месяцев назад +18

    i love dinosaurs 🦕

    • @You-Know-Youre-Right
      @You-Know-Youre-Right 5 месяцев назад

      I love dinosaur vore/inflation

    • @misuni9105
      @misuni9105 5 месяцев назад +2

      @@You-Know-Youre-Right ur not pyro lil bro

  • @appleseinvater
    @appleseinvater 5 месяцев назад +1

    45:04 so basically pizza marinara ain't no way they claiming it to be their own creation

  • @艾
    @艾 5 месяцев назад

    the only guy who can manage to absolutely slaughter a 30m video and make it 3x longer

  • @Scarecr0wn
    @Scarecr0wn 2 месяца назад

    The duality of Pyro slop.
    Seeing Dakota: This looks good, what´s with the hate?
    Seeing Iceland: Wtf do they have anything else than cliffs

  • @Auxiliary542
    @Auxiliary542 5 месяцев назад +27

    0 views in 7 minutes? Bro slopped off

  • @pathless4114
    @pathless4114 5 месяцев назад

    This video is practically a Pyro Place Sweden compilation

  • @itsyaboybats
    @itsyaboybats 5 месяцев назад +1

    The thumbnails in accurate she doesn't even have a double chin

  • @FregoliFent
    @FregoliFent 5 месяцев назад

    12:36 ain't nothing like an ice cold death grips song to engage me in the video

  • @LunarPurin
    @LunarPurin 4 месяца назад

    I love how the day after Pyro posted this, The Boys Season 4 got up to proper speed.

  • @cumber3631
    @cumber3631 5 месяцев назад +1

    the one time he acknowledged an ULTRAKILL question he gets distracted by a dono, L dono

  • @XzMondayNightzX
    @XzMondayNightzX 5 месяцев назад +2

    Where's the pause counter / timestamp guy? He's got his work cut out for this one.

  • @canidae.t33th
    @canidae.t33th 5 месяцев назад

    as a georgian i can confirm that all georgian horses are fented up at all times. mine is a tweaker

  • @bruhh9947
    @bruhh9947 5 месяцев назад +2

    U ain't slick Pyro for changing video title

  • @metro10-
    @metro10- 5 месяцев назад +6

    This man changes thumbnails every second.

  • @orlandowhitford4677
    @orlandowhitford4677 5 месяцев назад

    "go to the bathroom!!!!!!!"
    "no~"

  • @crow9582
    @crow9582 5 месяцев назад +1

    Whoever the editor is that decided to change the thumbnail, I thank you for your service and bravery for showing the ugly truth about Pyro

  • @DamjanKomadinic
    @DamjanKomadinic 5 месяцев назад +3

    restarting the daily asking of borderlands 2 (day 1)

  • @spongedog0013
    @spongedog0013 5 месяцев назад +2

    Blud is a professional yapper

  • @your_cult_leader3374
    @your_cult_leader3374 3 месяца назад

    pyro trying not to bring up something fart related on live challenge: impossible

  • @haydnkeller8237
    @haydnkeller8237 4 месяца назад

    Pyro. I’m from Pennsylvania and I can confirm Philly cheese steaks are Indeed cinema.

  • @iCarlysmom
    @iCarlysmom 5 месяцев назад

    pyro adding a single extra letter in the title 4 videos ago is INSANE

  • @Tobiemoss
    @Tobiemoss 5 месяцев назад

    Detroit gave us Juan Atkins, Kelli Hand, Eddie Fowlkes, Derrick May, Jeff Mills, Kevin Saunderson, Blake Baxter, Drexciya, Mike Banks, James Pennington, Robert Hood, Octave One, Carl Craig, Theo Parrish, Terrence Parker, Stacey Pullen, DJ Bone.

  • @Godboozer
    @Godboozer 5 месяцев назад

    The Rhode Island segment is ridiculously accurate

  • @BigSamWin
    @BigSamWin 5 месяцев назад

    If pyro asks if you have discord the correct response is ALWAYS “no”

  • @oofooflemon
    @oofooflemon 4 месяца назад +1

    place america: 😡😡😖😖😱😱😰😰😨😨
    place sweden: 🙀🙀😸😸😹 🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩

  • @krymsonuchiha14
    @krymsonuchiha14 5 месяцев назад

    As someone from the US trying to immigrate to the UK permanently, i couldnt wait to get to the PA part since im from there. And I can confirm philly cheesesteaks ARE AMAZING

    • @krymsonuchiha14
      @krymsonuchiha14 5 месяцев назад

      Also i dont think i went west enough to be appauled of my birth state.... BUT WHY DID THEY NOT MENTION ROCKY????😅

  • @hitslabproductions
    @hitslabproductions 5 месяцев назад

    Its insane how many times he paused, THE VIDEO IS TRIPLE THE SIZE PYRO

  • @DistortedDebaser
    @DistortedDebaser 4 месяца назад

    Why does the kid shitting himself sound like Cartman lmao

  • @tametalks6102
    @tametalks6102 5 месяцев назад

    as an Illinois resident corn fent and bean is accurate

  • @thatonerandomdoggo164
    @thatonerandomdoggo164 5 месяцев назад +1

    "that is some wizard of Oz shit" pyro, guess where that movie starts

  • @achmodinivswe9500
    @achmodinivswe9500 5 месяцев назад +1

    37:35 he sounds like Eric Cartman

  • @heckgrey8563
    @heckgrey8563 5 месяцев назад

    I feel like a dog watching this, patiently waiting for the main vid to resume playing like a treat, and suffering through the yapping
    1:3 content react ratio, bit of an endurance run, this one
    63333 views in 21 hours, viewers are cooked

  • @jokequad8
    @jokequad8 4 месяца назад

    Thought that was Casso 39:33
    I DONT WATCH HIM, BUT HIS CHILL

  • @YAH2121
    @YAH2121 5 месяцев назад

    take a drink everytime he pauses, but at least hes actually reacting

  • @jibbmuffly2416
    @jibbmuffly2416 5 месяцев назад

    As an iowan I can confirm that nothing interesting has happened here since 2008 when we had a bit of a flood

  • @Brusedlemon
    @Brusedlemon Месяц назад +1

    the darkwood book is lowkey sad rip book
    \

  • @dyingscarlet
    @dyingscarlet 5 месяцев назад +1

    max0r editing

  • @myxa3842
    @myxa3842 Месяц назад +1

    47:47

  • @Brick_Soup
    @Brick_Soup 3 месяца назад

    As someone who lives in Illinois I can confirm 99% is corn

  • @kevinchavez7701
    @kevinchavez7701 5 месяцев назад

    30 minute video turned into an hour video, incredible

  • @JakeWhoArtASnake
    @JakeWhoArtASnake 5 месяцев назад

    Only Pyro could triple the length of a video

  • @cooltrumpet0839
    @cooltrumpet0839 4 месяца назад

    pyros hairline is cooked

  • @jacksmix7123
    @jacksmix7123 5 месяцев назад +1

    FREEdom but has the most expensive Medical bills in the world

  • @sahajdeep_sandhu
    @sahajdeep_sandhu 2 месяца назад

    Pyronical looks more and more like XQC' son everyday 💀

  • @Invalid1711
    @Invalid1711 5 месяцев назад +1

    Why does jeff bezos laugh like the evil rick and morty meme

  • @Theboyfromjupiter
    @Theboyfromjupiter 5 месяцев назад

    Only Slop Pyro can almost TRIPLE the length of a 30 minute video

  • @yeth797
    @yeth797 5 месяцев назад

    Pyrocynical glazing sweden until he comes to skåne

  • @wake_up_wake_up
    @wake_up_wake_up 5 месяцев назад

    Second title second thumbnail bro felof the algorithm

  • @MoobOgler
    @MoobOgler 5 месяцев назад +2

    As someone from Indiana, it deserves an F

  • @catlovergaming5427
    @catlovergaming5427 5 месяцев назад

    child left behind at 15:52

  • @daddihannah8469
    @daddihannah8469 Месяц назад +1

    NORTH CAROLINA RISE UP

  • @polarbaloon
    @polarbaloon 4 месяца назад

    The guy who made skibidi toilet is actually of Russian origin, he's just a resident in Georgia

  • @PerfectedVenus_Monsoon
    @PerfectedVenus_Monsoon 3 месяца назад

    As a South Carolinian, we are exactly like the PS5; we have nothing to offer.

  • @sosa2153
    @sosa2153 4 месяца назад

    2014 pyro: making fun of reaction channels
    2024 pyro: reaction channel