I remember being a kid watching this episode when it premiered in 1998. My mouth dropped to the floor when they killed Cordelia so early into her “wish”. That was a dope twist. Nothing tops Ms.Calendar’s abrupt death but this was still a shocker.
Giles' last line to Anya is what stings me the most. He sounds so broken, so sad, we have no idea what this world's Giles has been through. He sounds outright desperate as he declares, "Because it has to be."
I think Buffy of "The Wish" represents one of the three common fates of The Slayer. Kendra, the found potential, trained from infancy to be a by-the-book weapon. Faith, the nihilist, seduced by the power and darkness of being the Slayer. Finally, and probably most common, Buffy. Thrown into a waking nightmare at 15, torn away from friends, family and a life in the sun. She fights alone, she dies before she's 18, and she dies with a look of peace on her face. Her nightmare is over.
Great review. So many amazing Buffy and Angel episodes to cover if you'd like to do more. I love Charmed more as well but Buffy/Angel has a special space in my heart as well.
The Wish was probably the only Cordelia-Centric episode that kills her halfway in the episode. It's kinda Ironic that she's the first one to die considering future episodes of Angel...
There actually is an official running tally regarding the amount of times Giles is knocked unconscious over on the channel Passion of the Nerd. Would love to see Dopplegangland (one of Joss’ personal fave episodes apparently) be the subject of one of your reviews! Also The Zeppo omg please bless us with a breakdown of your thoughts on The Zeppo lol
If you're a fan of these types of episodes, the second, third and fourth seasons of Doctor Who's revival series culminate in the stellar 'Turn Left', which tackles the same concept in a very powerful way.
Buffy: Why don't I just put a stake through her heart? Giles: She's not a vampire. Buffy: Yeah? Well, you'd be surprised how many things that'll kill. Possibly my favorite Buffy line of the series.
When you think about the metaphorical parts of Buffy that Xander, Willow, and Giles represent, it makes the episode even more interesting. Buffy in the Wishverse is all mind, but her heart and spirit have died. Giles is still fighting but Willow and Xander have succumbed to evil. I actually think evil Xander was pretty scary. The way he cups Willow’s head as they murder Cordelia? Cold as ice.
I would imagine the person who rejected Anya kicked herself when that role eventually became a regular. I've always wondered who it was. Can't wait to see more Buffy and Charmed videos.
It is truly an amazing episode....and Vampire Willow is actually a huge part of the reason that Doppelgangland (the later episode that features her again) is MY favorite. Willow was always my favorite character and getting to watch Alyson Hannigan really stretch her acting muscles as Vamp and Normal Willow and Normal Willow pretending to be Vamp Willow is just way too much fun. Plus the episode has some really hilarious scenes and dialogue.
"whenever I want to get on my 'Willow was actually bi' soapbox"--OMG THANK YOU. I have long felt like the only person on earth who hated the bi erasure of "nope, Willow's 100% gay now, she switched forever, no men ever again"--as if that's how it works... 🙄And frankly, since they debated it, Xander being bi would've been braver in the first place. I'm straight, so I have no horse in this race; I just thought that was incredibly f--ked.
I hope you cover some episodes featuring Angelus. He's quite possibly my favourite villain in the Buffyverse. It's so entertaining just watching him be an unrepentant evil bastard, especially in Angel. Season 4 might not have been the best but imo his return was definitely a highlight of it.
i was obsessed with this scene too, i love the way the master went down the stairs, small details like that mean the world to me because it showed his personality and the slow motion, the music thats playing over it, i remember the first time i saw it. magical.
Although you prefer Charmed, I hope you post a deep dive into SURPRISE/INNOCENCE, PASSION, and BECOMING of Buffy’s Season 2. The most riveting episodes of the season.
@@BetterWithBob YES!!! My favorite two moments are the last 5 minutes of Part 1(Kendra/Drusilla battle and Buffy hallway run scene) and Part 2(Buffy/Angel fight). Greatest nights of television ever! (Not just in 1998 lol)
I think it depends on which Charmed AU episode you compare this to, which one pulled it off better. Morality Bites will always have a special place in my heart, and certain scenes from it live rent-free in my head.
This was a great analysis, and... many thanks. I've been struggling with my NaNoWriMo project, and I realise now that the perfect villain for my hero should be Willow Rosenberg, or someone similar. And that episodes like The Wish and Becoming should be a key focus on the nature and pathfor how things progress. I always knew that things were personal for my hero, and that she had been friends at one point with said villain. I know the catalyst, what sets them on their different paths. Now I get what her friend becomes, and that my hero has to lose everything as a teenager, so she can start to find herself and who she is. Thanks for the video, it was great.
*Growing up Charmed was always my favourite show but the last few years that has changed to Buffy. I only really like seasons 1-3 of Charmed and season 4 is ok. so it came down to Buffy having more seasons that were better*
Definitely my favorite episode along with Dopplerland :) I like the episodes because they really show you like as a fan if you think about it Buffy got lucky when she killed the master if it wasn't for that window I think he would have killed her on the roof... story-wise I think it's kind of dumb how easily he did die though even though he is a sire of uber vampires. according to the comics... we know he's part of the Uber vampire race but it's kind of stupid that the master was never mention in the final season even though that is his origin story. Re-watching The Buffy series I can definitely tell that the creator of the show he was a good writer but he had trouble with story transition early on in his career because he didn't have that problem when he did the right end and creation of Marvel Agents of s.h.i.e.l.d.
Are you planning on making a video about the episode "Normal Again"? I'd so very much love to hear your thoughts on that one. Love your Buffy - and Charmed - videos, makes my dark soul sing beloved 90s tunes.
I re-watched this episode recently and I keep coming back to the same question: why would any humans in Sunnydale remain??? If the Hellmouth was wide open and the vamps were running around scooping up people for nourishment, then why stay? Sure, no one would buy their houses, but you have to consider the desire to live!
I think they hand wave that Sunnydale has really low property values which is why people keep living there lol. But since Anya created the universe she had to do lots of tweaking with real world logic
I take issue with being disappointed Cordelia didn’t have “character development” in this episode. Don’t you think she deserves to seethe a little longer? He really fucked her up
I think you can see in this episode in vampires Willow and Xander how Whedon was still undecided on which one he was going to make come out as gay. Despite them being presented as a couple, there's definite undertones of queer coding in the way they play their vampirised characters that make me think Whedon had at least discussed the possibility with them. Xander enjoys that scene of Willow torturing Angel just a slight bit more than it just being about Willow. And the way he caresses the bar on the cage as he's wstching is quite suggestive.
I don't hate Xander, but he can be a sanctimonious asshole that thinks he has the moral high ground. The way he treated Buffy after her return in season 3 was infuriating and the others didn't really treat her well either... On another note, for me the most annoying character was Dawn.
Willow was mostly definitely 100% gay having past opposite sex relationships is common with gay, she even says in season 5 episode 11 "well, hello, gay now"
That's called bi erasure. We saw Willow blissfully in bed with Oz AND making out with Xander; it's not like in real life where we don't see how people are in private. Then suddenly we're sweeping it all under the rug. That's not how life works. Not how sexuality works. Not how anything works. At best, the writing was INCREDIBLY poor because they'd decided too late between her and Xander that she was going to be the gay one (they were debating that during the first season.) I love this show, but I'm still not gonna pretend it didn't engage in bi erasure. Not wanting to seem like they were "watering down" Willow's sexuality doesn't excuse it.
@WynneL it's not bi erasure willow isn't bisexual she is gay this is stated several times in the show and joss wedon is on record stating that willow is gay from day one joss wanted to making either xander or willow gay and decided it should be willow, just because willow had "blissful" relations with guys doesn't mean she is bisexual,
@Atomic_Acorn969 but if a female has relationships with boys/men then come out as a lesbian/gay then they are gay as is the case with willow in season 4 she discovered she wasn't into men but only into women its very clearly stated in the show
I hate the episode where Joyce becomes the leader of an Anti-Slayer, Anti-Magic cult. (Gingerbread). It's one of the worst episodes in the show, and is overly frustrating to watch.
I don't mind it too much, probably because it was one of the first episodes I saw (I watched a few Season 1 episodes and then properly started from Season 3). I do love Willow's "come fill me with your black naughty evil" bit and Buffy impaling the monster by accident ("did I get it?")
@@BetterWithBob I'll admit the "did I get it?!" ending was good, and the whole episode isn't without SOME merit. Bad Buffy episodes are still better than a fair amount of television.
It kind of makes sense if you think of the evil as trying to take out its biggest threat (?? I'm inspired by all of the analysis I've read). Wasn't it described as an infection? (It's a shame to be annoyed with an episode ... I guess that's why I'm commenting.)
Per LGBTQ rules, Willow is a lesbian because she identifies as one. Per experience, her relationship with Oz DOESN'T read like "I'm doing this because it's what normal people do, but I'm not sure I'm into it" like most relationships lesbian's have with guys first - especially when vamp Willow put the thought into her head that she's kinda gay. He Who Is Hated said he didn't make her bisexual because he wanted to explore the gay character in an unambiguous way. So we're entitled to believe Willow is bi, but we can't say it to her face! :)
@@Kayjee17 Thing is, I'm not living in her universe. If Willow was my friend she'd be gay and I'd gladly accept her truth. But since I watched the show from the perspective of an omniscient viewer of her private life, and I saw her lying happily in bed with a man not looking at all uncomfortable but rather like her world was in the right place, I will reject the bi erasure/lesbian retconning forever.
Too bad some metoo bulldust had to taint this show as well. This world would be so much nicer if idiots had never started to retroactively accuse others of vague, unsubstantiated balderdash presented as being a lot worse than it actually was, charitably assuming it was true to begin with. Whedon was never accused of committing anything illegal or even strictly immoral. Carpenter said he was a dick to her, big freakin' whoop, and Trachtenberg said he was not allowed to be alone with her, which was never authoritatively confirmed by anyone, and is vague as fcuk. Knowing what a dork Whedon is he probably said some adult jokes when she was around which ruffled some feathers but I'd be willing to bet good money he never did anything improper to her.
More like 'it's disappointing that the show I like has a creator that is now more known for being an asshole to his cast members.' Telling one of your stars to 'have an abortion, or get fired' is unbelievably gross. I don't understand how anyone could honestly chalk this up to 'Oh, girls are so sensitive. Why can't they take a joke?'
I remember being a kid watching this episode when it premiered in 1998. My mouth dropped to the floor when they killed Cordelia so early into her “wish”. That was a dope twist.
Nothing tops Ms.Calendar’s abrupt death but this was still a shocker.
Yeah it was a neat way to show there was no plot armour in this universe.
@@BetterWithBob well said!
Giles' last line to Anya is what stings me the most. He sounds so broken, so sad, we have no idea what this world's Giles has been through. He sounds outright desperate as he declares, "Because it has to be."
One of my favorite lines and favorite scenes in the entire show
@@XenoZeal Right with you there. It has the impact of an emotional nuke.
Another great analysis! I can believe that comedic actors make great villains, possibly cause behind comedy there can be pain.
I think I remember reading somewhere from someone that there was a fine line between horror and comedy so...
I think Buffy of "The Wish" represents one of the three common fates of The Slayer.
Kendra, the found potential, trained from infancy to be a by-the-book weapon.
Faith, the nihilist, seduced by the power and darkness of being the Slayer.
Finally, and probably most common, Buffy. Thrown into a waking nightmare at 15, torn away from friends, family and a life in the sun. She fights alone, she dies before she's 18, and she dies with a look of peace on her face. Her nightmare is over.
I was a lit major and never put any of this together! I apparently don't put much thought into my "favorite" series ...
Great review. So many amazing Buffy and Angel episodes to cover if you'd like to do more. I love Charmed more as well but Buffy/Angel has a special space in my heart as well.
The Wish was probably the only Cordelia-Centric episode that kills her halfway in the episode. It's kinda Ironic that she's the first one to die considering future episodes of Angel...
And in like the next episode she makes the joke to Giles "one day you might wake up in a coma" and that's how she goes in the end.
@@BetterWithBob oh yeah forgot about that foreshadowing
There actually is an official running tally regarding the amount of times Giles is knocked unconscious over on the channel Passion of the Nerd. Would love to see Dopplegangland (one of Joss’ personal fave episodes apparently) be the subject of one of your reviews! Also The Zeppo omg please bless us with a breakdown of your thoughts on The Zeppo lol
If you're a fan of these types of episodes, the second, third and fourth seasons of Doctor Who's revival series culminate in the stellar 'Turn Left', which tackles the same concept in a very powerful way.
Buffy: Why don't I just put a stake through her heart?
Giles: She's not a vampire.
Buffy: Yeah? Well, you'd be surprised how many things that'll kill.
Possibly my favorite Buffy line of the series.
It's a doozy alright lol
@@BetterWithBob Any thoughts on digging into Xena: Warrior Princess? Seems like a show that would follow well behind Buffy & Charmed.
When you think about the metaphorical parts of Buffy that Xander, Willow, and Giles represent, it makes the episode even more interesting. Buffy in the Wishverse is all mind, but her heart and spirit have died. Giles is still fighting but Willow and Xander have succumbed to evil.
I actually think evil Xander was pretty scary. The way he cups Willow’s head as they murder Cordelia? Cold as ice.
I'm glad that Anya became a series regular after this episode I really liked her but I hated what happened to her in the series finale
Yeah supposedly Emma Caulfield volunteered to be killed that way, but then was disappointed at how anticlimactic it was
@@BetterWithBob yeah she did asked to be killed off because at the time nobody knew if the show would get renewed
Another banger of an analysis. I love this channel!
Why thank you :)
I would imagine the person who rejected Anya kicked herself when that role eventually became a regular. I've always wondered who it was.
Can't wait to see more Buffy and Charmed videos.
It is truly an amazing episode....and Vampire Willow is actually a huge part of the reason that Doppelgangland (the later episode that features her again) is MY favorite. Willow was always my favorite character and getting to watch Alyson Hannigan really stretch her acting muscles as Vamp and Normal Willow and Normal Willow pretending to be Vamp Willow is just way too much fun. Plus the episode has some really hilarious scenes and dialogue.
"whenever I want to get on my 'Willow was actually bi' soapbox"--OMG THANK YOU. I have long felt like the only person on earth who hated the bi erasure of "nope, Willow's 100% gay now, she switched forever, no men ever again"--as if that's how it works... 🙄And frankly, since they debated it, Xander being bi would've been braver in the first place.
I'm straight, so I have no horse in this race; I just thought that was incredibly f--ked.
I hope you cover some episodes featuring Angelus. He's quite possibly my favourite villain in the Buffyverse. It's so entertaining just watching him be an unrepentant evil bastard, especially in Angel. Season 4 might not have been the best but imo his return was definitely a highlight of it.
Becoming most likely, since it's an epic finale :)
I loved him as a villain. However he did seem less evil in Angel as compared to in Buffy. That’s my only grievance
@@s.haynes6759 true it just didnt feel like Angelus to me
This episode is truly one of the best in the series to me it was an interesting episode
i was obsessed with this scene too, i love the way the master went down the stairs, small details like that mean the world to me because it showed his personality and the slow motion, the music thats playing over it, i remember the first time i saw it. magical.
Oh yeah, happily taking on a Slayer head on and knowing he'll win because he has this empire around him. It's so subtle but brilliant
Wish was the first episode I ever episode saw from buffy.
This is one of my favorite episodes!
This was great bob ! Thank you
Thanks for watching 🙂
Although you prefer Charmed, I hope you post a deep dive into
SURPRISE/INNOCENCE, PASSION, and BECOMING of Buffy’s Season 2.
The most riveting episodes of the season.
Becoming is one of my favourites for sure - especially part one with all the flashbacks :)
@@BetterWithBob YES!!! My favorite two moments are the last 5 minutes of Part 1(Kendra/Drusilla battle and Buffy hallway run scene) and Part 2(Buffy/Angel fight). Greatest nights of television ever! (Not just in 1998 lol)
I would watch a video on every single episode - Bring it!!
I'll probably be doing one for the Halloween episode soon
@@BetterWithBob 😃
Before I watch, YESS!!! I've been waiting for you to do this! Thanks 🙏🙏🙏!!!
Hopefully worth the wait hehehehe
This is so good! Please do more from Buffy 🙂
I'll have on Halloween sometime in October :)
I think it depends on which Charmed AU episode you compare this to, which one pulled it off better. Morality Bites will always have a special place in my heart, and certain scenes from it live rent-free in my head.
I suppose I consider Morality Bites more of a bad future than an alternate reality
@@BetterWithBob Touché.
Vampire Willow is so damn cool!
Have you ever thought about comparing the villains from say Charmed, Buffy or even Angel? I think that would be interesting to see.
Interesting idea
This was a great analysis, and... many thanks. I've been struggling with my NaNoWriMo project, and I realise now that the perfect villain for my hero should be Willow Rosenberg, or someone similar. And that episodes like The Wish and Becoming should be a key focus on the nature and pathfor how things progress.
I always knew that things were personal for my hero, and that she had been friends at one point with said villain. I know the catalyst, what sets them on their different paths. Now I get what her friend becomes, and that my hero has to lose everything as a teenager, so she can start to find herself and who she is.
Thanks for the video, it was great.
*Growing up Charmed was always my favourite show but the last few years that has changed to Buffy. I only really like seasons 1-3 of Charmed and season 4 is ok. so it came down to Buffy having more seasons that were better*
I’m still excited to see your take on the 2012 version of Carrie The Musical. Love this video too though. 😆❤️
So far I love the opening song but I haven't checked out the rest 😂
@@BetterWithBob Well I hope you do soon, there are so many changes in it you won’t believe it.😂
my favorite episode ❤
One of my favorites 🙂
Definitely my favorite episode along with Dopplerland :) I like the episodes because they really show you like as a fan if you think about it Buffy got lucky when she killed the master if it wasn't for that window I think he would have killed her on the roof... story-wise I think it's kind of dumb how easily he did die though even though he is a sire of uber vampires. according to the comics... we know he's part of the Uber vampire race but it's kind of stupid that the master was never mention in the final season even though that is his origin story. Re-watching The Buffy series I can definitely tell that the creator of the show he was a good writer but he had trouble with story transition early on in his career because he didn't have that problem when he did the right end and creation of Marvel Agents of s.h.i.e.l.d.
Ahhhh Buffy. The GOAT of all supernatural shows.
Which Charmed being num 3 and Angel num 2 😳
Yeah I am in the "Willow is bi"-camp, while she mostly dated women in the latter seasons!
Are you planning on making a video about the episode "Normal Again"? I'd so very much love to hear your thoughts on that one. Love your Buffy - and Charmed - videos, makes my dark soul sing beloved 90s tunes.
I hadn't considered it but sure we never know ;)
I re-watched this episode recently and I keep coming back to the same question: why would any humans in Sunnydale remain??? If the Hellmouth was wide open and the vamps were running around scooping up people for nourishment, then why stay? Sure, no one would buy their houses, but you have to consider the desire to live!
I think they hand wave that Sunnydale has really low property values which is why people keep living there lol. But since Anya created the universe she had to do lots of tweaking with real world logic
Please do more Buffy episodes maybe the one with the Native American stuff mainly just cause I love Spikes reaction to that guy turning into a bear.
Oh and that's also the only time Angel and Anya share a scene
I watched them both
Are you also going to do a video for “Centennial Charmed” ? Love the vids 👏🏼
Not wild about that episode so we'll see lol
@@BetterWithBob me either.
@@BetterWithBob its one of my favs for probably all the wrong reasons 😂
I take issue with being disappointed Cordelia didn’t have “character development” in this episode. Don’t you think she deserves to seethe a little longer? He really fucked her up
I absolutely hate Xander 😡🤬
I would love to see you do bad girls I love my girl faith
I do have a small fun fact about that ep alright
@@BetterWithBob I think I know what your talking about but yeah it will be cool if you did it
I think you can see in this episode in vampires Willow and Xander how Whedon was still undecided on which one he was going to make come out as gay. Despite them being presented as a couple, there's definite undertones of queer coding in the way they play their vampirised characters that make me think Whedon had at least discussed the possibility with them.
Xander enjoys that scene of Willow torturing Angel just a slight bit more than it just being about Willow. And the way he caresses the bar on the cage as he's wstching is quite suggestive.
Love it.
What on earth would make someone like Charmed more than Buffy? I mean I think it’s kinda fun but objectively bad?
Anya is the best and I hate Zander for what he did to her
I liked centienal charmed but to each his own
Hehe I go into detail in my Cole Problem video on why
Vampire willow is a major reason I have an unhealthy attraction to toxic women 😂
I don't hate Xander, but he can be a sanctimonious asshole that thinks he has the moral high ground. The way he treated Buffy after her return in season 3 was infuriating and the others didn't really treat her well either...
On another note, for me the most annoying character was Dawn.
I found her annoying at first but she redeemed herself in Season 7 for me
i love vamp xander here tho
Tell me what we know about Joss Whedon. I know what's been claimed about Joss Whedon but please enlighten me about what we know about him.
I hope you do more Buffy episodes.
Had never come... Not: had never came... Bad grammar
Choosing Charmed over Buffy is blasphemy! Charmed was such a mess mid-season.
Willow was mostly definitely 100% gay having past opposite sex relationships is common with gay, she even says in season 5 episode 11 "well, hello, gay now"
That's called bi erasure. We saw Willow blissfully in bed with Oz AND making out with Xander; it's not like in real life where we don't see how people are in private. Then suddenly we're sweeping it all under the rug. That's not how life works. Not how sexuality works. Not how anything works. At best, the writing was INCREDIBLY poor because they'd decided too late between her and Xander that she was going to be the gay one (they were debating that during the first season.)
I love this show, but I'm still not gonna pretend it didn't engage in bi erasure. Not wanting to seem like they were "watering down" Willow's sexuality doesn't excuse it.
@WynneL it's not bi erasure willow isn't bisexual she is gay this is stated several times in the show and joss wedon is on record stating that willow is gay from day one joss wanted to making either xander or willow gay and decided it should be willow, just because willow had "blissful" relations with guys doesn't mean she is bisexual,
@@ziejackson6236 "stated" ≠ "shown"
If someone enjoys both genders, they are bi/pan whether they admit it or not. Sorry!
@Atomic_Acorn969 but if a female has relationships with boys/men then come out as a lesbian/gay then they are gay as is the case with willow in season 4 she discovered she wasn't into men but only into women its very clearly stated in the show
I hate the episode where Joyce becomes the leader of an Anti-Slayer, Anti-Magic cult. (Gingerbread). It's one of the worst episodes in the show, and is overly frustrating to watch.
I don't mind it too much, probably because it was one of the first episodes I saw (I watched a few Season 1 episodes and then properly started from Season 3). I do love Willow's "come fill me with your black naughty evil" bit and Buffy impaling the monster by accident ("did I get it?")
@@BetterWithBob I'll admit the "did I get it?!" ending was good, and the whole episode isn't without SOME merit. Bad Buffy episodes are still better than a fair amount of television.
It kind of makes sense if you think of the evil as trying to take out its biggest threat (?? I'm inspired by all of the analysis I've read). Wasn't it described as an infection? (It's a shame to be annoyed with an episode ... I guess that's why I'm commenting.)
willow is a lesbian period xx
I picked quite the hill to die on 😂🤣
Per LGBTQ rules, Willow is a lesbian because she identifies as one. Per experience, her relationship with Oz DOESN'T read like "I'm doing this because it's what normal people do, but I'm not sure I'm into it" like most relationships lesbian's have with guys first - especially when vamp Willow put the thought into her head that she's kinda gay. He Who Is Hated said he didn't make her bisexual because he wanted to explore the gay character in an unambiguous way.
So we're entitled to believe Willow is bi, but we can't say it to her face! :)
@@BetterWithBob I with you on that hill and have been so since the show and will continue to do so until the end.
@@Kayjee17 Thing is, I'm not living in her universe. If Willow was my friend she'd be gay and I'd gladly accept her truth.
But since I watched the show from the perspective of an omniscient viewer of her private life, and I saw her lying happily in bed with a man not looking at all uncomfortable but rather like her world was in the right place, I will reject the bi erasure/lesbian retconning forever.
Too bad some metoo bulldust had to taint this show as well. This world would be so much nicer if idiots had never started to retroactively accuse others of vague, unsubstantiated balderdash presented as being a lot worse than it actually was, charitably assuming it was true to begin with. Whedon was never accused of committing anything illegal or even strictly immoral. Carpenter said he was a dick to her, big freakin' whoop, and Trachtenberg said he was not allowed to be alone with her, which was never authoritatively confirmed by anyone, and is vague as fcuk. Knowing what a dork Whedon is he probably said some adult jokes when she was around which ruffled some feathers but I'd be willing to bet good money he never did anything improper to her.
More like 'it's disappointing that the show I like has a creator that is now more known for being an asshole to his cast members.'
Telling one of your stars to 'have an abortion, or get fired' is unbelievably gross. I don't understand how anyone could honestly chalk this up to 'Oh, girls are so sensitive. Why can't they take a joke?'