She didn't beleive she was pretty or worthy for a long time - that's one of the reasons why she had an eating disorder. I'm someone who had very low self esteem, and even though people commented about aspects of my personality and looks they liked - the issue was I didn't appreciate myself. Loving yourself because you fit a cultural standard is conditional self-love, she's advising unconditional self-love. Love that comes from within, and not based on comparison.
I learned all this reading the bible and having a relationship with God. And I must say she is truly blessed to have all this understanding and knowledge. Keep up the good work girl, I just can not stop smiling when I hear someone who's been through her depression coming out more beautiful and wiser. I'm very impress indeed!
I had the same thought "saved by a man" at first too. But, in revisiting my judgement, I realized that's just a step in her journey. Don't let the fact that she had someone to help her out of darkness become your focus. You'll miss the point. And besides, I use the word 'help' bc it was ultimately her choice to save herself. And it is that way for all of us.
After reading that manifesto one feels this is the fashionable "pretty pink" female version of Jesus / Buddha :) Jam-packed solid practical wisdom in this talk. Thanks.
Wow, I had the idea to buy a journal and fill it with all the things I love (like a vision journal) a couple months ago and thought of it again last night. This is a sign 😅 I definitely have to do it now!
Magic, as ever :) I am so proud to see a fellow Wellingtonian standing up there at TED telling her story like it is. I will remember meeting you once when you were about 14, fully into your goth phase and seeing the beautiful and amazing woman you are today. So proud. Kia kaha, arohanui.
Strong, confident, uplifting - it's good to hear from someone that has faced adversity in their life and beaten it. I think you should re name as " Real Self Love " and they should have you in every school. A retreat to re connect with yourself and nature would be fantastic in New Zealand one of the most wondrous places on the planet. Keep on keeping on - Kill the detractors with your smile and bury them with your success .
Every word Gala Darlin writes, says and shares strikes a wonderful, beautiful chord with me! I only hope that women of the world out there take a queue from Gala and indulge in some Radical Self Love!
how amazingly inspirational. i want to try doing this, because I am someone who always talks about knowing her worth, but I feel like when it comes to judging myself, I'm so pessimistic. I want to be optimistic and love myself, but I also want to maintain the distinction between unconditional self-love and unfounded pride.
This is not only relevant for women - it is relevant for all beautiful human beings struggling to love themselves and each other. good work gala. Lets all embrace ourselves now.xxxxx
Thank you so much for this. Thankyou for sharing your story. We are all individuals. If we all love our selves we will learn to love each other. Serving others also brings great love and happiness. Do onto others as you would wish them to do to you. Love one another. God bless you miss.
thankyou for this! I immediately shared it with my teenage daughter who is dealing with her own issues. We are soooo going to make our own self love journals(with a group of her friends)! Again, thankyou for sharing your heart!
Such an important and inspiring talk. Thank you so much! Just wish I could have heard it louder.... had all my volume settings up at the loudest... Thanx so much for your talk.
Typically I'd say something like "but there is an unaddressed danger of too much self love"... but this is such a huge problem, that I can't bear the thought of critiquing her for this wonderful talk. In this case, bringing that up would have hurt the talk, because it is of minor importance comparatively, and she modeled healthy behavior well at the end. well done.
we are who we are because we choose to be, but underlying that choice is the interaction between us and those around us. ultimate self-worth comes from within, but a lack of it often results from feeling unloved by others. you cannot love yourself unless you love others; you cannot love others unless you love yourself. and you must be able to simultaneously recognize love one receives. perhaps recognizing that one is loved is a possible first step toward attaining true inner self-worth.
I hope she was joking when she said, "Now I can eat 2 boxes of donuts and feel great". Actually, she would not feel great. Part of self-love is feeding yourself the healthiest food you can. Food is fuel and if you eat healthy and get some exercise, you will feel great. Exercise is great for depression as well. Good talk overall.
Food is also about sensoric pleasure, taste and enjoying a meal together with friends or family. countries with the healthies relationships to food, do not necessarily eat "the healthiest" as nutrionists would analyse it but do so with the most pleasure and most socialite. Think about france and italy. And they drink wine too! You can obsess too much over healthy food, it's called orthorexia and an eating disorder just a like.
Female empowerment is about rediscovering the power of feminine love and creativity and her power to create life. Male's responsibility is to use his physical power to serve and protect female. Neither side is more or less powerful, and both are far more powerful together than alone.
"Get along peacefully" and "fighting for one's own right" is not two things that can coexist. As long as there is fighting, there will be victims - especially if the fighting is done with a specific group in mind. Unless all groups are taken in account, there will be no peaceful solution. Fight for EVERYBODY's equal rights, and you'll be more open to the truth, in whatever way it comes.
empowerment is realizing that following strict cultural gender roles is a choice and one is free to opt out of that blueprint if they so choose. if one identifies with the socially-proscribed status quo of their gender archetype (as male=masculine and female=feminine), that is fine. it's just as fine not to! as long as each individual feels free to make their own individual choice... including their own unique definition of what masculinity and femininity mean to them.
It is really important to love yourself, but too much love is not that great. Who cares what anyone thinks? But when you start shoving yourself in other people's faces, it's not great. Self love and humility is the best way to go.
and i see what you're saying, i'm not squashing your opinion - merely pointing out that receiving a positive boost from compliments is NOT the be-all, end-all of the self-love process. merely another method of the journey toward empowerment. self-deprecation is narcissism's mirror opposite - the middle area in-between should be the goal. no man is an island, it's okay to recognize the good others see in you - as long as one also works toward seeing it in themselves, and others, as well.
did you watch the video?, aparently you want to be a stereotype, and that's the complete opposite of what Radical Self Love is about, they value inner and outter beauty, but not the beauty you see in magazines, apreciate the fact that you're unique, and be proud that you don't look like someone else, there's not only one point of view in beauty, everyone has his own concept of beauty,be beautiful to yourself and find someone who loves you for who you are, you ARE beautiful :)
Great article, you make your point very well. I do think that women need to recognize that fashion is an art in itself and that one get take enjoyment in playing dress up from time to time. I guess my greatest bout is with women that feel they have to dress themselves up because they are reinforced by attention from others. That can be a healthy or unhealthy reason to dress yourself nicely. Here is a perfect example:
I disagree. There is no solid self, but whatever manifests in this moment, whether you want to call it self or not, it doesn't matter. Love that. Love all that this life has to offer. Every molecule. Every moment. Love those you disagree with. Love, love, love.
So the beginning of your road to radical self love was finding someone who loved you enough to support you as you worked through your issues. Having the love and support of a romantic partner is huge. Is that the ring on your finger. Happy for you but not every one is so lucky.
Very inspirational. I definitely think i'll put into action what shes said. My only issue is that II think she should be what she is trying to promote. Dying her hair plantnum blonde and wearing expensive clothing to pad your self conscious isn't exactly a person I see as confident in themselves.
Philippians 4:8-9: Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-think about such things. 9 Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me-put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.
I am "thin and pretty" but it doesn't make it easy to love myself. People have still found ways to tear me down like criticizing my prominent chin or pointing out my broad shoulders. Advertisements still make you believe unless you're an airbrushed sex object you have to value as a woman. Being pretty or ugly is subjective and relative.
Not "saved by" just made to realize she was heading in the wrong direction. That sort of thing happens sometimes. It could have been any number of things, this time it just happened to be love.
She has some great points but the main problem with here self-love philosophy is that there is no connection between loving yourself and loving others. As humans we are social creatures, and have a need not only to love but to be love by others, not only to love and be loved by yourself. And if this is true it means that we are created to give something of ourselves to others which does not follow the model of self-love but of SELFLESS-LOVE.
i'm not saying she's part of a pyramid scheme, i'm saying the same argument you're using (hey, you gotta make a living somehow!) can also be used to defend pyramid schemers and a host of other shady "professions" when you don't factor in the importance of ethics and integrity.
And certainly, you know every single male being that exists on earth and can judge even those, who treat women equally and with respect. Are you a magician?
Is it always like this that you have to go through some bad things before you can get something valuable from it :( ? I had eating disorder before as well...
I was born with curly hair. On average, women who have straight hair are more likely to be hired for higher paying jobs. Now should I reinforce straight hair because I want work a professional job? No. Does straight hair get me more societal benefits? Yes. I'm sure there are plenty of ways I can update my appearance to become "who I want to be". Is that futuristic me realistic or am I idolizing someone else? Exploration is healthy, but once you've gotten the message, put down the phone.
I think women have different needs in self-esteem and self-love with societal gender roles and such. There is a need for this kind of female empowerment still with the rates of suicide, self-harm, and eating disorders. Not to mention the lack of quality female role models in everyday media and advertisements. I'm all for men and women empowerment too but I also support programs aimed for people of a specific gender or other groups (disabilities, races, etc)
Each person's value begins the same when born, then we can add or take away from our valuability with our choices in behavior. Equality is a red flag word. People do not have equal value. Would you rather have a hard worker on your crew or a lazy one? The former because her value/payoff is higher. The real point is liberation. Women need to be liberated from men/the patriarchy. The common man needs to be liberated from the ruling class. Once that stuff's done, we can talk comparative value.
I'm not going to get into an argument about who can prove they hate themselves more, all I'll say is one person's self-hate isn't lesser than just because they don't cut or starve themselves. As for having to make a living, that doesn't let her off the hook. Would you defend pyramid schemers the same way? There's a thing called INTEGRITY. If she really wanted to help her followers, she'd point them towards experts, or do the hard work to become one herself. Not half-ass it like she does.
Oh PLEASE!!! The man isn't the point is was someone that loved her enough to say "hey your behavior is unacceptable and if you want a relationship your going to have to get some help"!!! And that was how SHE got started on self love, you might have a different story.
That a surprising number of negative votes. Most can agree that fashion is for a social means (not always, but in most cases). People who see fashion as an art will dress "up" even when they are at home alone. They don't need people to be looking at their art piece to create it. If I told you an artist continues to make painting when his friends compliment/look at his work, would you say he loves making art or does he love the social validation?
This is about "ego creation". NO! Self love, is "self" revealing and is independent of social standards. This should be titled "the media sucks and makes us question ourselves as individual humans". In the vein of "self love" ... there is but 1 reality: your own each head is a world what you think is none of my business (i cannot know what you think, it will always be our own opinion of whatever we deal with). we're born alone & we die alone (screaming) your own urine is your own salvation it's called "self realization" the intensity of self knowledge is so fierce we continually seek to remove ourselves from being with ourselves, for this reason solitary confinement is so harsh and is a punishment. Self love is not an easy task. But it can be done but we shouldn't worry about it, it will come when we are ready it takes thousands of lifetimes to reach perfect affinity with the pure self
The problem I continue to have with her and women like this is the lack of understanding that not everyone is going to have a man or woman or anyone care enough about them to get them out of their issues. She does come off absolutely hypocritical 1. The whole video starts with a glammed up photo of her and 2. Her healing began because she wanted to please someone else.
her story is that she met a romantic partner and they helped her teach her how to heal and eventually learn to love herself... okay. what if i don’t have that??
her story doesn't have to be your story- I understand what you are asking- but think of it this way- her boyfriend at the time helped her- maybe SHE (this talk) can help you?
What?? This woman has Overcome many obstacles to bring about this wisdom that she lives and can recommend to people - even people like yourself Melissa. Please don't judge - learn.
I appreciate your feedback but I don't believe that she truly embodies self-love as she has recently gotten breast implants which is a sign of NOT loving oneself radically LOL. It seems to me to be hypocritical.
I'm not judging just stating a fact. If a fact proves that you are mislabeling yourself then it's socially responsible to tell the truth. It seems dishonest to me to claim self love and then get implants. Makes no sense in my opinion. I am simply stating the facts. If a young girl asked me if this person embodies self love, I'd say no. I am entitled to my opinion. But I do wonder...how does self love and then using plastic surgery to make your breasts bigger go hand in hand? Surgery is a dangerous and expensive process that could lead to many complications. I would imagine that someone who truly embodies self love would love their natural sexy breasts just the way they are!!! That's true self love.
1. It is TEDx - not as vetted as TED and 2. I think for someone with a self-mutilation history, one should forgive her a few minor "sins" :) She isn't a perfect wise saint, and it is a great positive that she now pampers herself enough to get a cosmetic surgery (from that past). Although I agree that if she were even stronger and perfectly accepting of herself she might not have bothered about appearance at all, but it's a "useful good enough versus impossible perfect" situation.
I just think people need to be fair and give guys a brake sometimes. You get tired of having to make a lot of money, be cool, be macho, then also be sensitive to female needs but at the same time, try your best to date or marry the hottest girl possible. All the while you are wanting sex so bad because of the testosterone. You are shunned and considered a loser if you can't get a girl even though you bust your ass trying. If you are too nice to a girl she will friend you and no sex or love.
If you are too mean, some women get turned off. You have to have just the right balance or douche baggery. The Jersey shore guys seemed to have mastered it. Women will say that's not what they want but they will sleep with guys like that every time and leave decent guys in the dust unless they are really ugly, then they have accept a nice guy.
This is the first I've heard of Gala being called a fraud and I've been reading her free blog for years. She's great and so motivating. But I shouldn't be surprised, every woman I've followed online has been called a fraud at least once, somewhere. But interestingly that doesn't seem to happen to the men I follow. We, as a society, need to stop doing this. So I'm calling you out first.
I'm extremely disappointed that TED is inviting such a lower caliber of people like gala darling. She is Not an expert in this field, not even close, she's just learned how to generate a huge fanbase. If she did some research, she'd know that the self-esteem movement is old news. Studies are finding that it is Not the key to happiness. People with high self-esteem don't necessarily love themselves more, they just have bigger egos, which is BAD. Self-compassion is a more balanced approach.
While I absolutely adore this message, wouldn't it benefit more than just women? Society places impossible standards on everyone, everyone can have issues with their body and confidence; men, women, trans people, people who don't know what the crap they are, aren't they all special people who deserve to love themselves? Women have problems in society, of course, but to say that we're the only ones with problems or the even the ones with the worst problems, is, in my opinion, highly debatable.
![Blox Fruits Dragon Rework Update [Full Stream]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/EqDAp8udhm0/mqdefault.jpg)
Gala Darling has just become my most favourite person on earth. Young girls especially need to hear her message.
She didn't beleive she was pretty or worthy for a long time - that's one of the reasons why she had an eating disorder. I'm someone who had very low self esteem, and even though people commented about aspects of my personality and looks they liked - the issue was I didn't appreciate myself. Loving yourself because you fit a cultural standard is conditional self-love, she's advising unconditional self-love. Love that comes from within, and not based on comparison.
i honestly and truly adore this woman. i just want the world to take on radical self love...its changed my life.
I learned all this reading the bible and having a relationship with God. And I must say she is truly blessed to have all this understanding and knowledge. Keep up the good work girl, I just can not stop smiling when I hear someone who's been through her depression coming out more beautiful and wiser. I'm very impress indeed!
I had the same thought "saved by a man" at first too. But, in revisiting my judgement, I realized that's just a step in her journey. Don't let the fact that she had someone to help her out of darkness become your focus. You'll miss the point. And besides, I use the word 'help' bc it was ultimately her choice to save herself. And it is that way for all of us.
After reading that manifesto one feels this is the fashionable "pretty pink" female version of Jesus / Buddha :) Jam-packed solid practical wisdom in this talk. Thanks.
Wow, I had the idea to buy a journal and fill it with all the things I love (like a vision journal) a couple months ago and thought of it again last night. This is a sign 😅 I definitely have to do it now!
this lady is amazing and a true inspiration!!!
LOVED your talk and hearing your story, Gala Darling - Radical Self Love -- you're a fabulous role model.
Magic, as ever :) I am so proud to see a fellow Wellingtonian standing up there at TED telling her story like it is. I will remember meeting you once when you were about 14, fully into your goth phase and seeing the beautiful and amazing woman you are today. So proud. Kia kaha, arohanui.
Loved this talk. Love her! Thank you Gala for having the courage to love yourself and share with us!!
great speech. one thing personally I realized that compliments from other people had no effect on me because I couldn't feel it within.
Strong, confident, uplifting - it's good to hear from someone that has faced adversity in their life and beaten it.
I think you should re name as " Real Self Love " and they should have you in every school.
A retreat to re connect with yourself and nature would be fantastic in New Zealand one of the most wondrous places on the planet.
Keep on keeping on -
Kill the detractors with your smile and bury them with your success .
Wow 2023 came across this right before tapping to her high vibes...this is incredible!💗💫🙌🏽 Love this!!
Ooh, love these tips, Gala Darling! And your EFT sessions are brilliant. Thanks for being such a bright neon pink shining star! You rock!
Every word Gala Darlin writes, says and shares strikes a wonderful, beautiful chord with me! I only hope that women of the world out there take a queue from Gala and indulge in some Radical Self Love!
how amazingly inspirational. i want to try doing this, because I am someone who always talks about knowing her worth, but I feel like when it comes to judging myself, I'm so pessimistic. I want to be optimistic and love myself, but I also want to maintain the distinction between unconditional self-love and unfounded pride.
This is not only relevant for women - it is relevant for all beautiful human beings struggling to love themselves and each other. good work gala. Lets all embrace ourselves now.xxxxx
Thank you so much for this. Thankyou for sharing your story. We are all individuals. If we all love our selves we will learn to love each other. Serving others also brings great love and happiness. Do onto others as you would wish them to do to you. Love one another. God bless you miss.
GALA YOU ARE TRULY A REALLY INSPIRING PERSON. THIS IS A REALLY UNDERRATED VIDEO. ANYONE COULD BENEFIT FROM THIS. THANK YOU 💖
thankyou for this! I immediately shared it with my teenage daughter who is dealing with her own issues. We are soooo going to make our own self love journals(with a group of her friends)! Again, thankyou for sharing your heart!
Such an important and inspiring talk. Thank you so much! Just wish I could have heard it louder.... had all my volume settings up at the loudest... Thanx so much for your talk.
Larimar Blu headphones 😬
what a wonderful lady with a wonderful message. this is awesome! I totally agree on the subject of tabloids/ gossip magazines
Typically I'd say something like "but there is an unaddressed danger of too much self love"...
but this is such a huge problem, that I can't bear the thought of critiquing her for this wonderful talk. In this case, bringing that up would have hurt the talk, because it is of minor importance comparatively, and she modeled healthy behavior well at the end.
well done.
Beautiful message for every woman! Thank you!
Loved listening to your story, and will follow the manifesto. Now. And. Forever. Thanks!
Thank you so much for the video. Thanks to Erin Henry to introduce this video to me.
we are who we are because we choose to be, but underlying that choice is the interaction between us and those around us. ultimate self-worth comes from within, but a lack of it often results from feeling unloved by others. you cannot love yourself unless you love others; you cannot love others unless you love yourself. and you must be able to simultaneously recognize love one receives. perhaps recognizing that one is loved is a possible first step toward attaining true inner self-worth.
What a fabulous woman!! You're wonderful Gala! Hugs from Montpellier, France!
Just watching and hearing this makes me feel better inside!!!
I hope she was joking when she said, "Now I can eat 2 boxes of donuts and feel great". Actually, she would not feel great. Part of self-love is feeding yourself the healthiest food you can. Food is fuel and if you eat healthy and get some exercise, you will feel great. Exercise is great for depression as well. Good talk overall.
She eats pretty damn well, she's just talking about the feelings of guilt etc
Food is also about sensoric pleasure, taste and enjoying a meal together with friends or family. countries with the healthies relationships to food, do not necessarily eat "the healthiest" as nutrionists would analyse it but do so with the most pleasure and most socialite. Think about france and italy. And they drink wine too! You can obsess too much over healthy food, it's called orthorexia and an eating disorder just a like.
How would you know she wouldn't feel great lmao you aren't her...
Female empowerment is about rediscovering the power of feminine love and creativity and her power to create life. Male's responsibility is to use his physical power to serve and protect female. Neither side is more or less powerful, and both are far more powerful together than alone.
"Get along peacefully" and "fighting for one's own right" is not two things that can coexist. As long as there is fighting, there will be victims - especially if the fighting is done with a specific group in mind. Unless all groups are taken in account, there will be no peaceful solution. Fight for EVERYBODY's equal rights, and you'll be more open to the truth, in whatever way it comes.
Turning something basic like radical self love (free free free) into a big money making business. I need to get in on this, please teach me.
There are lots of opportunities for motivational speakers as they can be very inspiring and life changing- I'm sure you can find a program somewhere.
I'm so happy this is finally posted!! I go to CMU but I couldn't be there
I really like the part where you recited the self radical love manifesto
empowerment is realizing that following strict cultural gender roles is a choice and one is free to opt out of that blueprint if they so choose. if one identifies with the socially-proscribed status quo of their gender archetype (as male=masculine and female=feminine), that is fine. it's just as fine not to! as long as each individual feels free to make their own individual choice... including their own unique definition of what masculinity and femininity mean to them.
Men can definitely participate in empowerment. Many men have done so for me, and I for them.
It is really important to love yourself, but too much love is not that great. Who cares what anyone thinks? But when you start shoving yourself in other people's faces, it's not great. Self love and humility is the best way to go.
and i see what you're saying, i'm not squashing your opinion - merely pointing out that receiving a positive boost from compliments is NOT the be-all, end-all of the self-love process. merely another method of the journey toward empowerment. self-deprecation is narcissism's mirror opposite - the middle area in-between should be the goal. no man is an island, it's okay to recognize the good others see in you - as long as one also works toward seeing it in themselves, and others, as well.
Beautifully spoken.
You are so inspiring, Gala; I was close to tears :)
This is such a wonderful video. Thank you, Gala! :)
Great! Have me food for thought I really feel inspired.
did you watch the video?, aparently you want to be a stereotype, and that's the complete opposite of what Radical Self Love is about, they value inner and outter beauty, but not the beauty you see in magazines, apreciate the fact that you're unique, and be proud that you don't look like someone else, there's not only one point of view in beauty, everyone has his own concept of beauty,be beautiful to yourself and find someone who loves you for who you are, you ARE beautiful :)
Great article, you make your point very well. I do think that women need to recognize that fashion is an art in itself and that one get take enjoyment in playing dress up from time to time. I guess my greatest bout is with women that feel they have to dress themselves up because they are reinforced by attention from others. That can be a healthy or unhealthy reason to dress yourself nicely.
Here is a perfect example:
I disagree. There is no solid self, but whatever manifests in this moment, whether you want to call it self or not, it doesn't matter. Love that. Love all that this life has to offer. Every molecule. Every moment. Love those you disagree with. Love, love, love.
Thanks Gala I'll look for it.
self does not mean ego or body-you. Self means sole. self esteem means respect the sole not you.
also, writing down in a book all the compliments people give you. that is just relying on others to dictate your self worth - or lack thereof.
love it..I will start my own raical love!! Thanks
So the beginning of your road to radical self love was finding someone who loved you enough to support you as you worked through your issues. Having the love and support of a romantic partner is huge. Is that the ring on your finger. Happy for you but not every one is so lucky.
Very inspirational. I definitely think i'll put into action what shes said. My only issue is that II think she should be what she is trying to promote. Dying her hair plantnum blonde and wearing expensive clothing to pad your self conscious isn't exactly a person I see as confident in themselves.
Why shouldn't she be able to dye her hair and wear whatever she wants?
Just went looking for it, but I had a hard time finding it. What is the title for it?
Philippians 4:8-9: Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-think about such things. 9 Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me-put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.
I would prefer a gift voucher from a hardware store than a boquet of 💐
Luv it! with love from NZ.
I am "thin and pretty" but it doesn't make it easy to love myself. People have still found ways to tear me down like criticizing my prominent chin or pointing out my broad shoulders. Advertisements still make you believe unless you're an airbrushed sex object you have to value as a woman. Being pretty or ugly is subjective and relative.
she's so amazing
Not "saved by" just made to realize she was heading in the wrong direction. That sort of thing happens sometimes. It could have been any number of things, this time it just happened to be love.
Great video. Thank you very much. ❤x
I agree, and thanks for saying so!
I'm all for female empowerment, but I really wish there were more role models and advocates for men on the issue of self-esteem and self-love.
agree- but int doesn't take away from this talk
She has some great points but the main problem with here self-love philosophy is that there is no connection between loving yourself and loving others. As humans we are social creatures, and have a need not only to love but to be love by others, not only to love and be loved by yourself. And if this is true it means that we are created to give something of ourselves to others which does not follow the model of self-love but of SELFLESS-LOVE.
love you Gala!
She's from New Zealand but has been living in NYC for years.
i'm not saying she's part of a pyramid scheme, i'm saying the same argument you're using (hey, you gotta make a living somehow!) can also be used to defend pyramid schemers and a host of other shady "professions" when you don't factor in the importance of ethics and integrity.
why didn't you recommend EFT if you credit it with healing you from your eating disorder?
thank you for sharing!
And certainly, you know every single male being that exists on earth and can judge even those, who treat women equally and with respect. Are you a magician?
Is it always like this that you have to go through some bad things before you can get something valuable from it :( ? I had eating disorder before as well...
There's no need for her to have radical self love when I would GLADLY give her all the loving she wants.
Love her.
I was born with curly hair. On average, women who have straight hair are more likely to be hired for higher paying jobs. Now should I reinforce straight hair because I want work a professional job? No.
Does straight hair get me more societal benefits? Yes. I'm sure there are plenty of ways I can update my appearance to become "who I want to be". Is that futuristic me realistic or am I idolizing someone else? Exploration is healthy, but once you've gotten the message, put down the phone.
Love Gala
Amazing quote from the Buddha
I think women have different needs in self-esteem and self-love with societal gender roles and such. There is a need for this kind of female empowerment still with the rates of suicide, self-harm, and eating disorders. Not to mention the lack of quality female role models in everyday media and advertisements. I'm all for men and women empowerment too but I also support programs aimed for people of a specific gender or other groups (disabilities, races, etc)
powerful.
Try the Good Men Project!
Each person's value begins the same when born, then we can add or take away from our valuability with our choices in behavior.
Equality is a red flag word. People do not have equal value. Would you rather have a hard worker on your crew or a lazy one? The former because her value/payoff is higher.
The real point is liberation. Women need to be liberated from men/the patriarchy. The common man needs to be liberated from the ruling class.
Once that stuff's done, we can talk comparative value.
I'm not going to get into an argument about who can prove they hate themselves more, all I'll say is one person's self-hate isn't lesser than just because they don't cut or starve themselves. As for having to make a living, that doesn't let her off the hook. Would you defend pyramid schemers the same way? There's a thing called INTEGRITY. If she really wanted to help her followers, she'd point them towards experts, or do the hard work to become one herself. Not half-ass it like she does.
10:53 YES! Judgement is poison.
Oh PLEASE!!! The man isn't the point is was someone that loved her enough to say "hey your behavior is unacceptable and if you want a relationship your going to have to get some help"!!! And that was how SHE got started on self love, you might have a different story.
That a surprising number of negative votes. Most can agree that fashion is for a social means (not always, but in most cases).
People who see fashion as an art will dress "up" even when they are at home alone. They don't need people to be looking at their art piece to create it.
If I told you an artist continues to make painting when his friends compliment/look at his work, would you say he loves making art or does he love the social validation?
This is about "ego creation".
NO!
Self love, is "self" revealing and is independent of social standards. This should be titled "the media sucks and makes us question ourselves as individual humans".
In the vein of "self love"
... there is but 1 reality: your own
each head is a world
what you think is none of my business
(i cannot know what you think, it will always be our own opinion of whatever we deal with).
we're born alone & we die alone (screaming)
your own urine is your own salvation
it's called "self realization"
the intensity of self knowledge is so fierce we continually seek to remove ourselves from being with ourselves, for this reason solitary confinement is so harsh and is a punishment. Self love is not an easy task. But it can be done but we shouldn't worry about it, it will come when we are ready it takes thousands of lifetimes to reach perfect affinity with the pure self
so true
The problem I continue to have with her and women like this is the lack of understanding that not everyone is going to have a man or woman or anyone care enough about them to get them out of their issues. She does come off absolutely hypocritical 1. The whole video starts with a glammed up photo of her and 2. Her healing began because she wanted to please someone else.
her story is that she met a romantic partner and they helped her teach her how to heal and eventually learn to love herself... okay. what if i don’t have that??
You have ur story urself, example : you have You, and you have this acknowledgment, its a great start
her story doesn't have to be your story- I understand what you are asking- but think of it this way- her boyfriend at the time helped her- maybe SHE (this talk) can help you?
why is this directed at women instead of people in general?
I am in . RADICAL SELF LOVE
Way to go kiwi girl.....arohanui :))
I love women but I am sick of everyone in the media feeling sorry for women when they have it so much better than men.
This TED talk reminds me not to trust TED for always picking wise people for their platform. I must always check the person's background.
What?? This woman has Overcome many obstacles to bring about this wisdom that she lives and can recommend to people - even people like yourself Melissa. Please don't judge - learn.
I appreciate your feedback but I don't believe that she truly embodies self-love as she has recently gotten breast implants which is a sign of NOT loving oneself radically LOL. It seems to me to be hypocritical.
I'm not judging just stating a fact. If a fact proves that you are mislabeling yourself then it's socially responsible to tell the truth. It seems dishonest to me to claim self love and then get implants. Makes no sense in my opinion. I am simply stating the facts. If a young girl asked me if this person embodies self love, I'd say no. I am entitled to my opinion. But I do wonder...how does self love and then using plastic surgery to make your breasts bigger go hand in hand? Surgery is a dangerous and expensive process that could lead to many complications. I would imagine that someone who truly embodies self love would love their natural sexy breasts just the way they are!!! That's true self love.
1. It is TEDx - not as vetted as TED and 2. I think for someone with a self-mutilation history, one should forgive her a few minor "sins" :) She isn't a perfect wise saint, and it is a great positive that she now pampers herself enough to get a cosmetic surgery (from that past). Although I agree that if she were even stronger and perfectly accepting of herself she might not have bothered about appearance at all, but it's a "useful good enough versus impossible perfect" situation.
I just think people need to be fair and give guys a brake sometimes. You get tired of having to make a lot of money, be cool, be macho, then also be sensitive to female needs but at the same time, try your best to date or marry the hottest girl possible. All the while you are wanting sex so bad because of the testosterone. You are shunned and considered a loser if you can't get a girl even though you bust your ass trying. If you are too nice to a girl she will friend you and no sex or love.
If you are too mean, some women get turned off. You have to have just the right balance or douche baggery. The Jersey shore guys seemed to have mastered it. Women will say that's not what they want but they will sleep with guys like that every time and leave decent guys in the dust unless they are really ugly, then they have accept a nice guy.
This is the first I've heard of Gala being called a fraud and I've been reading her free blog for years. She's great and so motivating. But I shouldn't be surprised, every woman I've followed online has been called a fraud at least once, somewhere. But interestingly that doesn't seem to happen to the men I follow. We, as a society, need to stop doing this. So I'm calling you out first.
I'm extremely disappointed that TED is inviting such a lower caliber of people like gala darling. She is Not an expert in this field, not even close, she's just learned how to generate a huge fanbase. If she did some research, she'd know that the self-esteem movement is old news. Studies are finding that it is Not the key to happiness. People with high self-esteem don't necessarily love themselves more, they just have bigger egos, which is BAD. Self-compassion is a more balanced approach.
While I absolutely adore this message, wouldn't it benefit more than just women? Society places impossible standards on everyone, everyone can have issues with their body and confidence; men, women, trans people, people who don't know what the crap they are, aren't they all special people who deserve to love themselves? Women have problems in society, of course, but to say that we're the only ones with problems or the even the ones with the worst problems, is, in my opinion, highly debatable.
AriadneBelle b
there you go with the negativity, ahhh
RSD Brad