Do you feel ready to kick out procrastination for good? I hope you enjoyed today’s episode as much as I enjoyed recording it! I’d be so grateful if you’d drop a like and subscribe for more videos like this!
Mel, I'm in my late 40's. I wish you had counseled me like this 29 years ago. I'd be where I want to be. I procrastinate because I'm so far behind where I need to be and it scares the crap out of me. It feels like I have to rush and go a million miles an hour and do a million things in order to get caught up. Caught up to where I should be in life. But I end up doing nothing most of the time. I just think about it and plan to do it later. But later never comes. Help!
Towards the end of this Podcast, I did a simple clean up of the mess in my house, ate lunch and sent a message to someone I needed advice from. This is helpful. Now I'm going to get a shower. I forgive myself for 2 hours of mindless scrolling on RUclips..but I'm glad it led me to this Podcast by Mel. Very helpful. God bless your good heart 🙏
It’s all about my ADHD. For me it’s not really about procrastination, it’s about activation. Procrastination implies that one doesn’t want to do the thing. With ADHD it isn’t about not wanting to do the thing, it’s a problem starting because of overwhelm or overthinking or transitioning from what I’m already doing.
i'm ADHD-tistic, 55, a lifelong struggler who has often habitually procrastinated around doing THE VERY THINGS THAT MAKE ME HAPPY. Maybe give Mel's talk and tools a chance and a try? They are designed to empower. 💜
@@liv2learner l have the same issue... Maybe l am not doing what l love because l am blocking myself because of stressing about procrastination on other important things... 🙄
I like to call my procrastination from stress “Analysis Paralysis “. Because that’s exactly what it feels like when I have so many thoughts I’m sorting through in my head!
There was one other time in my life that I needed to hear that voice of clarity that helps me understand WTF is going on in my life. I'm at that point again. This time you are that voice of clarity. I am mightily struggling with procrastination and as it happens so is my young daughter. We both shared moments during this podcast when we felt like we finally understood why we do what we do. I am grateful.
I am getting worse at procrastinating. And yes there is this constant burden of worries and stress on my shoulders. Too many things to do equals paralisis and avoidance. Plus I am a perfectionist, which doesn't help. Thank you Mel! 20:04
I can’t imagine how a person can have so much love to absolutely everyone of the audience and put the hard truth in such a simple cozy emotional way - so that you feel attending the most comforting and useful lesson possible with the greatest Teacher in your life
Mel Robbins, I was in tears half way into this because you hit every single nail right on the head, ticked every box, rang all the bells! I remember, years ago, I used to write to a soldier, like a pen pal and he once said that he so loved getting my letters because he felt like I was in the room, talking to him. We were just friends, nothing romantic. That's how I felt while I was watching this podcast, like you were in the room, kicking MY ass. Thank you ❤
oh-my-god! All these decades I thought I procrastinated because I was incompetent, a scatter brain, unable to focus....this is a massive relief to know the underlying ACTUAL cause of my procrastination. Looking at or thinking about the many unfinished projects I have, makes me realize that I must be, I AM, under a ton of stress. This knowledge equips me with the potential to begin to finish (or discard) those many projects and be kind to myself, forgiving me for the procrastination and take steps to begin altering this behavior. I am glad to have watched your healing trauma episode; the tools you shared in that podcast will help heal my trauma, and reduce stress....oh, the potential. Thank you Mel, I am forever grateful❤
love the idea of the “stress backpack”-to further on that thought, to handle the stress you can’t take everything out of your backpack at once, it’s too much to carry and somethings gonna fall! you have to take things out of your “backpack” one at a time to deal with them one at a time.
This is just what I needed this morning. Had forms to fill out and just pushed through the internal resistance I felt and stopped the dialogue trying to convince me not to. This will also help so much with art. THANK YOU ❤️
I'm getting better at opening these videos. The video with the anxiety doctor. I think I have watched that 4 times now. A short video about the self-high five, I didn't think I'd do it but listening made me laugh and give it a try, now I'm getting to work and realizing that I didn't do it yet, got to get to the bathroom and high five myself before I go teach (2 days into the self-high-five). My anxiety is in check when I do this, my confidence and control is significantly better. Then, I listen to this video today and before I finished the video, I finished 2 weekly reports that are supposed to be finished Wednesday (today is Tuesday afternoon). All of my preparation that I need to do before each class is already sorted out for the entire week. Now instead of having a stressful Wednesday and potentially the rest of the week. All I have to do is teach my normal classes, go back to the office and relax. It doesn't hurt to give a few more high fives throughout the day. In the evening yesterday I even caught myself saying to myself "learning to love yourself". Thank you.
I procrastinated with my Master’s program so badly, i had to add on an additional semester to finish. This cost me thousands of dollars and i was within a couple days of failing out of the program. In the end i finished, but i look back now and feel shame that i couldn’t just get it together and complete it on time. I’ve been this way my entire life and did the same thing in my bachelor’s program as well. I won’t go back to school again due to this issue.
I finished my Master's and all energy and took tests for certification, and I have procrastinated for a long time for my last test. (Years) costing me $
I feel you!! There's nothing worse than kicking your own butt because you feel like you screwed yourself!! Congratulations on getting your Masters. :))) ❤
23:32 This is so me! I loved into a town home last year that is actually one of the nicest places I've ever lived I've felt so uncomfortable here. I haven't put up one picture on the wall because, idk why. I guess I don't want to mess up the walls. But I don't feel like I belong or that I deserve this. But anything good that happens to me I self sabotage. For instance when I was younger I was approached by two different modeling scouts to model. They wanted me to come in and walk, audition and I also had an record producer to reach out to me after hearing me sing at church one day and asked me record with him. He wanted to get me started in a music business and that is one of my dreams and I turned all of them down like a crazy person 🤦🏾♀️. I feel so stupid sometimes because I let go of so much because I don't feel deserving or I feel I'm not good enough 💔 but, I know that's not true but I keep telling myself that.
Wow, I have just gotten a little relief. My stress level is what is causing my procrastination. 😔 It is costing me so much. I want this weight lifted. Thanks Mel.
Started watching this today because I’m having horrible procrastination right now. I’m actually trying to get my slides done for my dissertation proposal defense. Mind you this is the second defense I’ve had to do because I had to switch my topic after Covid hit so I’m dragging my feet. I was starting to beat myself up but instead I decided to see what Mel had to say on the topic because I recall she struggled with procrastination also. Grateful for this video. Keep ‘em coming. And know that your honesty is so refreshing. Thank you!!!
I have come to realize the reasons for my own procrastination. One of the reasons is that the *thing* I am *procrastinating* about, that I *_thought_* I wanted to do, turns out that I *did not really want to do, after all.* It seems to be the case for me, time after time. That is not to say that I have not accomplished things in my life; I have. But those accomplishments are things that come without a ton of stress and heartache (admittedly, the accomplishments did take a lot of work). I've become comfortable with the way I view my procrastination, so I don't end up hating myself as much as I had in previous years.
Absolutely love this episode & especially appreciate Mel’s encouraging demeanour & down-to-earth ‘I get it, it gets me’ real talk! What’s been a game-changer for me has been accountability buddies - formal (writing group w lots of structure) & informal (quick text exchanges). If people haven’t tried the Pomodoro method, I can’t recommend checking that out enough, too, there’s a reason why grad students worship it - ha! Sending everyone best wishes for overcoming their procrastinating tendencies - you’ve got this!
I procrastinate so much, it IS a habit. Everything your caller said-that’s my life-right down to being an artist. I have so much I want to do and just can’t bring myself to do it. Saying this is a stress response is so true and something I knew before, but I’m glad you mentioned that it could stem from something deeper like a childhood trauma because I never thought it’d be from something that deep, but it makes sense. Many times I’m so stressed out that I do freeze and cannot get anything done, I try to justify not doing what needs to be done by saying I need a break and others because I’m so stressed out that I shouldn’t need to do it right now. Many times I just will waste so much time convincing myself that I shouldn’t have to because of that and maybe a part of me believes that if I hold out long enough it will just take care of itself eventually or I wont need to do it by the time I feel like coming around to needed to do it. There’s much shadow work being done here around all of this!
Mel hit the nail on the head with the stress backpack. I have put of making a phone call for weeks because of the stress and fear of the conversations outcome not the call itself...this podcast is eye opening.
Thank you for sharing the research. It’s brilliant. I’ve also watched your video on childhood trauma and how we need to teach ourselves to deal with stress. Growing up in a harsh, achievement-oriented environment I’ve got a long way to go but I’ll start being nicer to myself, big promise. I spent the last decade basically not doing what I’m supposed to so… growing out of that whilst not feeling completely exhausted will be great.
one step deeper is knowing what is causing the stress, most of the times the reason is awareness, the moment you decide i am going to look for stress you will find that the moment you started looking for what is causing all this stress it will start to disappear just like the ice melting into water and then steam and just disappearing. just like you turn on the light in a room filled with darkness. the light is awareness, the stress is darkness it does not exist, darkness is just absence of light.
thank you so much. i turned 30 a month ago, n finally FINALLYYYYYYY, i can now understand that i have a habit of procrastination. Thank you so much Mel
So when you started talking about your "bread basket", I immediately resonated. I'm 46 and definitely know my body is changing. The difference, though, is that I have no DESIRE to see anymore medical doctors. I've been to at least a dozen, had a colonoscopy and upper gi, etc. done. "Get on anti-depressants and try a low FODMAP diet" was the main advice I got. The problem in this case, is that the procrastination might stem from a lack of faith in the institutions that are failing us. I truly believe that this is a root cause for many, especially within these past 2 years.
Thank you Mel. This video was an absolute revelation. I have been so hard on myself lately and stressing about not recording guitar covers for my RUclips channel. The negative talk in my head has been self perpetuating and it always feels like I’m never good enough and I say to myself what’s the point when there are so many more talented musicians than myself? I’m finally now forgiving myself for these feelings and it feels like the burden has been lifted from my chest. Like you say in your video I was laughing at the feeling of doing this because it sounds so trivial and stupid but it really does work. I’ve tried the 5 second rule before but always fell off track but I feel like these 2 steps before are the missing ingredient and I’m now ready to pick up the guitar again and start recording. It’s such a good feeling to just forgive yourself for things that have already happened in the past. Something I’ve never really done before properly in my life until now.
❤ the first thing that came to me about procrastination was fear holding me back. And as a result, I was escaping into TV series to avoid doing anything. I have created a new program to teach people how to “Rock &Roll at Any Age” (I am 80 and doing great) but can’t seem to do what I need to market it. Thanks for your input. I will talk to my future self now!!❤❤
I've gotten here for the first time and I absolutely loved it. First of all, most of the things I think I knew in the back of my mind, but they've gotten so clearly explained that I'm absolutely fascinated. Usually when I watch even 10-minutes video, I get distracted like 5 times, but here I've listened to the whole podcast in one breath. The way you get your listener involved is unreal, big appreciation for that. I almost wanted to cry about how much I loved this, thank you
OMG..I can sooooo relate!! I am a major procrastinator with doctor appointments (for many reasons) and I have SERIOUS high blood-pressure and my resistance to taking big-pharma drugs contributes to my procrastinating. I DO eat super healthy, am active and dump tons of $$ on supplements; trying to get my BP down naturally isn't working 🤥 Plus, I MUST be going through menopause (finally..at 56) because my emotions are all over the map and my body goes from cold to hot in minutes! UGH!!! Thank you Mel for all your videos!!
I know Mel is right. I'm seeing several triggers in my life from when I was little negative memories that locked in my belief thought patterns and even more recent ones today. I'm digging out a little bit quicker because of this video. I'm a work in progress trying to just keep working on so many projects and only starting at the tip of everything I've avoided over a lifetime of anger and recent resentment. Mel has her bread basket and some of us men have 2" and was the talk of my immediate family. At least it grows to about 6" and size only matters if you think it does or if there's a deep hole evolved. TMI, I know just saying. I'm 62 and thank God seeing this video and forgetting the past, ignoring peoples negative aditudes and letting God's holy spirit mercy, forgiveness, and wisdom give me strength to follow through with my creative passion to earn retirement money. I'm sure I am that. I am abundant and blessed. Prayers for all the world and its leaders 🙏 thanks Mel and God bless you too 🙏
Endless plans on a phone list, to do's on designing the decor inside & outside my house, myself & ways to improve, my car repairs, notes,lists,planners, buys, do, calls, texts, emails, then completely overwhelmed, freeze then as the negative bs rolls in ok switch, then meds lay down,🙏 drift to sleep. If i wake well in the afternoon feel better for a while, until the cycle begins itself again. Yes work things & even fun things that i really want to so much is pushed back. Years of deaths, major health issues with hospitalizations, financial struggle has really got me,so does another major move for me when i have never cleaned organized from 3 years ago just partially. Beside my faith this woman named mel is saving my life (dramatic?)❤️🙏 🌹
This is very helpful. This is what I needed. I know I have this habit of procrastinating beacause a lot of people believe in me but I am still disappointed to see where I am right now, left behind doing nothing... And waiting for something to change without changing anything....I will face everyday differently because of this. Thank you Mel..!
huge respect to you mam for saying the line " the word "comfortable" doesn't mean that you like it. It means that you are used to it......This line breaks so many problems I have.
OMG, I so needed this. I too have ADD, but mine procrastination is there and is based I know in fear of not succeeding, the trauma from childhood where I was many times not good enough for my mom, and overwhelm from how far behind I have gotten in some things. Tomorrow morning, over coffee, I am having a conversation with myself. Pulled out my copy of the book and rereading Chapter 11.
I lost focus on my creativity when my mom died in 2022. I tried to follow a beading pattern that I really wanted to make and I just kept struggling with it until I had to stop. I still haven't found my way back. That perceived failure has bled into all the other creative attempts since. I lost confidence in my abilities. When I am faced with an opportunity to be creative I'm held back by the fear of failure. Others know that I am capable, but I am paralyzed by the fear that I'm not anymore, or that I just got lucky.
Thank you for this episode. I have been working on something for months and every time I try to work on it, I end up getting nervous and not getting it done. The next time I attempt to work on it and if the same thing happens, I will remember these steps. You have given me the courage to get it done.
Good morning, Mel.. I’m 83, finances down the drain, have a way out.. not doing it. Your discussion in this video Re procrastinating is probably going to save my ass! Now if I could only figure out what the trigger is.. think maybe the “perfection” thing may be part of it. What more can I do to identify the trigger? Thank you for all your work!! I’m subscribed.
For past one month, I been procrastinating on finishing my videos. When even I sat to work on it, my brain goes numb and I just get distracted by other non productive stuff. I just get frozen on very idea to start my pending works. I just stair for hours and just do nothing about it. And every night go with this guilt feeling that I just wasted on more time. Its slowly eating me up since few months. Tonight I gonna break thats cycle, forgive myself and start working on what stresses me out, the pending works. Thank you Mel.
Oh my gosh,I'm massively struggling with procratination,,,,,,,mostly from ongoing sleep deprivation!!!!! Am I in denial Mel? I've been in nonstop chronic physical pain & barely sleep!!! Prior to sleep deprivation,I minimally " procrastinated"!!!!
I’m in the field of creativity, and I really connected with what Vidi asked Mel, and this episode really hit me! Thanks for sharing this! Thanks for this amazing episode! You’re the best ♥
Thank you Mel for giving us the tools to overcome this habit. It's incredible how powerful it was for me once I understood this in your video. I'll take it as a little push from my future self. I'll start today because, as you said, "Once you start, its likely you'll keep going. Thanks a lot.
Thanks for another amazing episode, Mel! And thanks again for being the only one to tell me that you love me. Some days you just need to hear it. Even if you’ve been married to someone for 20 years, and they refuse to say it anymore or feel it or show it. 💔I’m thankful for you and your words and your showing love. 🫶🏼🧡
I love Mel Robin's 💓 It's been long, this podcast truly made me feel like a part of the community. I kept researching procrastination and most of them were not as deeply addressed as you did. I am all set to go on a doing mode 💪
No one cares about you No one will do it for you No one will come to rescue you if you don't rescue yourself 😢 These are the word you once said in one of your videos and they literally changed my life and I literally started writing my dissertation and I am still on it Thank God! God bless you 🙏 insha'Allah!
FINALLY! An in depth explanation that makes complete sense AND with the solution. Thank you so much Mel! You have a subscriber and someone who will be sharing. God bless you!
listened to this twice in two days (and you're right - I shared also). I love this different perspective and it rings very true & accurate. Along with James Clear/Atomic Habits (pretty sure!), I really like the idea of the future self and just simply starting to act like (and consult) the future me I want to be...only by going ahead and behaving/doing like that person do I become that person...and build momentum by building the habits of that person. This also shines even more light on a procrastinating habit I have....to get stuck in the endless PLANNING of doing....which is so my 'normal comfort' procrastination cycle. Here I go....5 4 3 2 1, go.....
You know something I've been told a lot. People tell me "if your procrastinating it's because you don't like it and you need to do something else" Without knowing a proper response to that it feels like "You don't the know what liking something is anymore" every thought in your mind is questioned, you become lost.
Iv been doing this with my website. It took me 3 weeks to finally pick and purchase the hosting. I started creating my website and I got to this place where I'm just stuck, not sure what should go where, what colors should go where, I can seem to get a decent photo of myself and I put working on it off all day long. I'll do it after I vacuum the living room, then the dinning rug, end up doing the upstairs, then I'm cleaning the kids room the playroom, throwing dirty cloths downstairs when I come down stairs now I should probably take those to the basement to get washed, oh I mise well throw a load in the washer, I come up stairs oh I need to clean the kitchen counters, I'll start the dish washer, well when I'm done cleaning up I'll sit down and work on the website. But it's just a never ending cycle I NEVER stop cleaning its exhausting I clean when I'm stressed
OMG Mel *** Thank you a million times for this Amazing Podcast 👍😃: A real wake up call for me: even at 66. Read a 100 books etc on procrastination, but YOU just hit it straight on the nail head for me…. Thank you ,for always keeping it simple to inspire Me to make a difference in my and thousands of people around our Universe 😘🙏; I Love-all that you teach us 💖🎉😀: Thank you forYOU 💃❣️: Love from Copenhagen Denmark 🇩🇰,
I am proscastinating while seeing proscastination videos at work I am very good and speedy with house tasks like cleaning, cooking etc but I procastinate so much and everyday with my office work
I was 32 going threw change an had to have a complete thyroid removal and lost two vocal cords in the process of the surgery. If I had Not delayed it I wouldn't have got the cancer.. Please Mel we love you don't put your health off.
It's amazing how easy it has become to put labels on everything we do in life. I wish you'd talk about how caustic labeling is to an individual's psyche... and how the ways we focus on those labels limit our true potential.
I needed this! I have been procrastinating to finish watching it, because that would have been the solution right there. Still needed to escape. I have just managed to pull my husband back from a divorce. This is my last chance. Due to this disease that is so entrenched, my husband ran out of hope. I need to get it right. One thing I have realized is I must have been stressed all my life. Time to take control. Time to face the 5 minute rule head on!
Thanks for this episode! I could so relate to Vida’s testimonial. I put off writing because I figure no one is going to appreciate it anyway. Major imposter syndrome.
I'm trying to think about what Im stressed about and all I'm stressed about is the thing I'm procrastinating on. I want and need to loose weight. Everytime I try I fail almost instantly. It's like I think about how Im gonna do it and all the things I want and need to do to achieve it but as soon as I start I'm miserable and end up giving up. It's like I can't bare to be out of my comfort zome
Try keto or gluten free! See if it helps,carbs,sugar and alcohol all put on weight! Also if you eat meat try mock meat once or twice a week to help cut down on animal fats!! Cardio a few times a week!Good luck
The thing is.. in a way I agree that I'm avoiding stress in a way but I'm in such denial of what connection the two things have. When I procrastinate its always "I'll do it in an hour.. in an hour and a half" "oh but this is just so much more comforting to do." Of course, I want to do this project but at the same time in this moment I couldn't care less about it. I don't procrastinate my hobbies I procrastinate things like schoolwork and its eating me alive. I sit a week before an exam working on the topic but I get bored not even 10 minutes later and just turn on netflix and all of a sudden its the night before the exam and I'm studying a 50 page topic with two cups of coffee next to me. Am I just lazy? Because if I'm being realistic, I don't care about these topics enough for me to consider its stress. And then even if I do that gives me the comfort of not doing something, I blame it on everyone but myself. I blame the stress. I make it my excuse. What's wrong with me?
Hi Mel. This is my first ever comment on your channel. I just want to tell you that I've been successfully wake up sharp at 6.45AM for the past one week. It was challenging to do it soon after the alarm but I did 54321 and it got me to get up. I am proud to say I didn't fail at it. I hope I can do better using 54321 for my business journey. And Mel, thank you.
I totally get it. We procrastinate about paying the bills because we can't face the fact that we owe more than we make. That thought leads us into a tailspin of anxiety and self doubt and the fact that we need to confront some things like why we are afraid to go look for a job. Or why are we afraid to kick the boyfriend out who is spending my money on the stuff he convinced me he had to have, like the car he needed so he could go out and get a job, which he hasn't done yet and I am afraid to confront him. So I totally get it. Thank you Mel!!!
Do you feel ready to kick out procrastination for good? I hope you enjoyed today’s episode as much as I enjoyed recording it! I’d be so grateful if you’d drop a like and subscribe for more videos like this!
Mel, I'm in my late 40's. I wish you had counseled me like this 29 years ago. I'd be where I want to be. I procrastinate because I'm so far behind where I need to be and it scares the crap out of me. It feels like I have to rush and go a million miles an hour and do a million things in order to get caught up. Caught up to where I should be in life. But I end up doing nothing most of the time. I just think about it and plan to do it later. But later never comes. Help!
Damn, this was a good one.
That line “It’s like feeling shitty has become a comfortable feeling”. BINGO, that’s exactly it!!!
Towards the end of this Podcast, I did a simple clean up of the mess in my house, ate lunch and sent a message to someone I needed advice from. This is helpful. Now I'm going to get a shower. I forgive myself for 2 hours of mindless scrolling on RUclips..but I'm glad it led me to this Podcast by Mel. Very helpful. God bless your good heart 🙏
"Procrastination is the attempt to feel better in this moment.
Procrastination is a response to stress." 💯
It’s all about my ADHD. For me it’s not really about procrastination, it’s about activation. Procrastination implies that one doesn’t want to do the thing. With ADHD it isn’t about not wanting to do the thing, it’s a problem starting because of overwhelm or overthinking or transitioning from what I’m already doing.
i'm ADHD-tistic, 55, a lifelong struggler who has often habitually procrastinated around doing THE VERY THINGS THAT MAKE ME HAPPY. Maybe give Mel's talk and tools a chance and a try? They are designed to empower. 💜
My son with ADHD complains about the same thing.
Adult with ADHD here and I feel you. It’s debilitating for me
Yes! Its always been my issue. I've recently discovered executive function and how this is a significant part of my ADHD Proscrastination.
@@liv2learner l have the same issue... Maybe l am not doing what l love because l am blocking myself because of stressing about procrastination on other important things... 🙄
Keeping promises to yourself builds self-worth. ❤️
I like to call my procrastination from stress “Analysis Paralysis “. Because that’s exactly what it feels like when I have so many thoughts I’m sorting through in my head!
There was one other time in my life that I needed to hear that voice of clarity that helps me understand WTF is going on in my life. I'm at that point again. This time you are that voice of clarity. I am mightily struggling with procrastination and as it happens so is my young daughter. We both shared moments during this podcast when we felt like we finally understood why we do what we do. I am grateful.
I am getting worse at procrastinating. And yes there is this constant burden of worries and stress on my shoulders. Too many things to do equals paralisis and avoidance. Plus I am a perfectionist, which doesn't help. Thank you Mel! 20:04
Same....paralysis, avoidance and perfectionism ☹️
I can’t imagine how a person can have so much love to absolutely everyone of the audience and put the hard truth in such a simple cozy emotional way - so that you feel attending the most comforting and useful lesson possible with the greatest Teacher in your life
Mel Robbins, I was in tears half way into this because you hit every single nail right on the head, ticked every box, rang all the bells! I remember, years ago, I used to write to a soldier, like a pen pal and he once said that he so loved getting my letters because he felt like I was in the room, talking to him. We were just friends, nothing romantic. That's how I felt while I was watching this podcast, like you were in the room, kicking MY ass. Thank you ❤
oh-my-god! All these decades I thought I procrastinated because I was incompetent, a scatter brain, unable to focus....this is a massive relief to know the underlying ACTUAL cause of my procrastination. Looking at or thinking about the many unfinished projects I have, makes me realize that I must be, I AM, under a ton of stress. This knowledge equips me with the potential to begin to finish (or discard) those many projects and be kind to myself, forgiving me for the procrastination and take steps to begin altering this behavior. I am glad to have watched your healing trauma episode; the tools you shared in that podcast will help heal my trauma, and reduce stress....oh, the potential. Thank you Mel, I am forever grateful❤
love the idea of the “stress backpack”-to further on that thought, to handle the stress you can’t take everything out of your backpack at once, it’s too much to carry and somethings gonna fall! you have to take things out of your “backpack” one at a time to deal with them one at a time.
This is just what I needed this morning. Had forms to fill out and just pushed through the internal resistance I felt and stopped the dialogue trying to convince me not to. This will also help so much with art. THANK YOU ❤️
I'm getting better at opening these videos. The video with the anxiety doctor. I think I have watched that 4 times now. A short video about the self-high five, I didn't think I'd do it but listening made me laugh and give it a try, now I'm getting to work and realizing that I didn't do it yet, got to get to the bathroom and high five myself before I go teach (2 days into the self-high-five). My anxiety is in check when I do this, my confidence and control is significantly better. Then, I listen to this video today and before I finished the video, I finished 2 weekly reports that are supposed to be finished Wednesday (today is Tuesday afternoon). All of my preparation that I need to do before each class is already sorted out for the entire week. Now instead of having a stressful Wednesday and potentially the rest of the week. All I have to do is teach my normal classes, go back to the office and relax. It doesn't hurt to give a few more high fives throughout the day. In the evening yesterday I even caught myself saying to myself "learning to love yourself".
Thank you.
I procrastinated with my Master’s program so badly, i had to add on an additional semester to finish. This cost me thousands of dollars and i was within a couple days of failing out of the program. In the end i finished, but i look back now and feel shame that i couldn’t just get it together and complete it on time.
I’ve been this way my entire life and did the same thing in my bachelor’s program as well. I won’t go back to school again due to this issue.
I finished my Master's and all energy and took tests for certification, and I have procrastinated for a long time for my last test. (Years) costing me $
I feel you!! There's nothing worse than kicking your own butt because you feel like you screwed yourself!! Congratulations on getting your Masters. :))) ❤
I have been procrastinating since 12...and it's absolutely stressful
Congratulations on completing your masters...can't tell you how much I can relate....the shame I have felt and the fear it has put in me
Thank you, Mel. Everything you are saying is so on point.
I love you, Mel. You hit the spot every time. You're amazing. I listen to your videos every morning. And I always get an aha moment. ♥️♥️♥️♥️
Thank you Mel, I made notes and will print it out so I can learn the method, also for daily reminder 🌸🥰
23:32 This is so me! I loved into a town home last year that is actually one of the nicest places I've ever lived I've felt so uncomfortable here. I haven't put up one picture on the wall because, idk why. I guess I don't want to mess up the walls. But I don't feel like I belong or that I deserve this. But anything good that happens to me I self sabotage. For instance when I was younger I was approached by two different modeling scouts to model. They wanted me to come in and walk, audition and I also had an record producer to reach out to me after hearing me sing at church one day and asked me record with him. He wanted to get me started in a music business and that is one of my dreams and I turned all of them down like a crazy person 🤦🏾♀️. I feel so stupid sometimes because I let go of so much because I don't feel deserving or I feel I'm not good enough 💔 but, I know that's not true but I keep telling myself that.
Wow, I have just gotten a little relief. My stress level is what is causing my procrastination. 😔 It is costing me so much. I want this weight lifted. Thanks Mel.
Started watching this today because I’m having horrible procrastination right now. I’m actually trying to get my slides done for my dissertation proposal defense. Mind you this is the second defense I’ve had to do because I had to switch my topic after Covid hit so I’m dragging my feet. I was starting to beat myself up but instead I decided to see what Mel had to say on the topic because I recall she struggled with procrastination also. Grateful for this video. Keep ‘em coming. And know that your honesty is so refreshing. Thank you!!!
I have come to realize the reasons for my own procrastination. One of the reasons is that the *thing* I am *procrastinating* about, that I *_thought_* I wanted to do, turns out that I *did not really want to do, after all.* It seems to be the case for me, time after time. That is not to say that I have not accomplished things in my life; I have. But those accomplishments are things that come without a ton of stress and heartache (admittedly, the accomplishments did take a lot of work). I've become comfortable with the way I view my procrastination, so I don't end up hating myself as much as I had in previous years.
Absolutely love this episode & especially appreciate Mel’s encouraging demeanour & down-to-earth ‘I get it, it gets me’ real talk! What’s been a game-changer for me has been accountability buddies - formal (writing group w lots of structure) & informal (quick text exchanges). If people haven’t tried the Pomodoro method, I can’t recommend checking that out enough, too, there’s a reason why grad students worship it - ha! Sending everyone best wishes for overcoming their procrastinating tendencies - you’ve got this!
I procrastinate so much, it IS a habit. Everything your caller said-that’s my life-right down to being an artist. I have so much I want to do and just can’t bring myself to do it.
Saying this is a stress response is so true and something I knew before, but I’m glad you mentioned that it could stem from something deeper like a childhood trauma because I never thought it’d be from something that deep, but it makes sense.
Many times I’m so stressed out that I do freeze and cannot get anything done, I try to justify not doing what needs to be done by saying I need a break and others because I’m so stressed out that I shouldn’t need to do it right now. Many times I just will waste so much time convincing myself that I shouldn’t have to because of that and maybe a part of me believes that if I hold out long enough it will just take care of itself eventually or I wont need to do it by the time I feel like coming around to needed to do it.
There’s much shadow work being done here around all of this!
Mel hit the nail on the head with the stress backpack. I have put of making a phone call for weeks because of the stress and fear of the conversations outcome not the call itself...this podcast is eye opening.
Thank you for sharing the research. It’s brilliant. I’ve also watched your video on childhood trauma and how we need to teach ourselves to deal with stress.
Growing up in a harsh, achievement-oriented environment I’ve got a long way to go but I’ll start being nicer to myself, big promise.
I spent the last decade basically not doing what I’m supposed to so… growing out of that whilst not feeling completely exhausted will be great.
one step deeper is knowing what is causing the stress, most of the times the reason is awareness, the moment you decide i am going to look for stress you will find that the moment you started looking for what is causing all this stress it will start to disappear just like the ice melting into water and then steam and just disappearing. just like you turn on the light in a room filled with darkness. the light is awareness, the stress is darkness it does not exist, darkness is just absence of light.
thank you so much. i turned 30 a month ago, n finally FINALLYYYYYYY, i can now understand that i have a habit of procrastination. Thank you so much Mel
So when you started talking about your "bread basket", I immediately resonated. I'm 46 and definitely know my body is changing. The difference, though, is that I have no DESIRE to see anymore medical doctors. I've been to at least a dozen, had a colonoscopy and upper gi, etc. done. "Get on anti-depressants and try a low FODMAP diet" was the main advice I got. The problem in this case, is that the procrastination might stem from a lack of faith in the institutions that are failing us. I truly believe that this is a root cause for many, especially within these past 2 years.
Yes, there’s something psychological in the changes in the country that we hear very day
1.forgive yourself
2.understand why you are stressing out
3.ask yourself “what is your future you want you to do"
4.use 5 second rule
Thank you Mel. This video was an absolute revelation. I have been so hard on myself lately and stressing about not recording guitar covers for my RUclips channel. The negative talk in my head has been self perpetuating and it always feels like I’m never good enough and I say to myself what’s the point when there are so many more talented musicians than myself? I’m finally now forgiving myself for these feelings and it feels like the burden has been lifted from my chest. Like you say in your video I was laughing at the feeling of doing this because it sounds so trivial and stupid but it really does work. I’ve tried the 5 second rule before but always fell off track but I feel like these 2 steps before are the missing ingredient and I’m now ready to pick up the guitar again and start recording. It’s such a good feeling to just forgive yourself for things that have already happened in the past. Something I’ve never really done before properly in my life until now.
Procrastination is the thief of time! So insightful Mel👍🏻💖
❤ the first thing that came to me about procrastination was fear holding me back. And as a result, I was escaping into TV series to avoid doing anything. I have created a new program to teach people how to “Rock &Roll at Any Age” (I am 80 and doing great) but can’t seem to do what I need to market it. Thanks for your input. I will talk to my future self now!!❤❤
I've gotten here for the first time and I absolutely loved it. First of all, most of the things I think I knew in the back of my mind, but they've gotten so clearly explained that I'm absolutely fascinated. Usually when I watch even 10-minutes video, I get distracted like 5 times, but here I've listened to the whole podcast in one breath. The way you get your listener involved is unreal, big appreciation for that. I almost wanted to cry about how much I loved this, thank you
I love listening to your podcast. It’s truly motivating me to get back into my routines. Thank you!
OMG..I can sooooo relate!! I am a major procrastinator with doctor appointments (for many reasons) and I have SERIOUS high blood-pressure and my resistance to taking big-pharma drugs contributes to my procrastinating. I DO eat super healthy, am active and dump tons of $$ on supplements; trying to get my BP down naturally isn't working 🤥 Plus, I MUST be going through menopause (finally..at 56) because my emotions are all over the map and my body goes from cold to hot in minutes! UGH!!! Thank you Mel for all your videos!!
I know Mel is right. I'm seeing several triggers in my life from when I was little negative memories that locked in my belief thought patterns and even more recent ones today. I'm digging out a little bit quicker because of this video. I'm a work in progress trying to just keep working on so many projects and only starting at the tip of everything I've avoided over a lifetime of anger and recent resentment. Mel has her bread basket and some of us men have 2" and was the talk of my immediate family. At least it grows to about 6" and size only matters if you think it does or if there's a deep hole evolved. TMI, I know just saying. I'm 62 and thank God seeing this video and forgetting the past, ignoring peoples negative aditudes and letting God's holy spirit mercy, forgiveness, and wisdom give me strength to follow through with my creative passion to earn retirement money. I'm sure I am that. I am abundant and blessed. Prayers for all the world and its leaders 🙏 thanks Mel and God bless you too 🙏
Endless plans on a phone list, to do's on designing the decor inside & outside my house, myself & ways to improve, my car repairs, notes,lists,planners, buys, do, calls, texts, emails, then completely overwhelmed, freeze then as the negative bs rolls in ok switch, then meds lay down,🙏 drift to sleep. If i wake well in the afternoon feel better for a while, until the cycle begins itself again. Yes work things & even fun things that i really want to so much is pushed back. Years of deaths, major health issues with hospitalizations, financial struggle has really got me,so does another major move for me when i have never cleaned organized from 3 years ago just partially.
Beside my faith this woman named mel is saving my life (dramatic?)❤️🙏 🌹
I appreciate your effort in making this video! it was incredibly helpful for me.👍
This is very helpful. This is what I needed. I know I have this habit of procrastinating beacause a lot of people believe in me but I am still disappointed to see where I am right now, left behind doing nothing... And waiting for something to change without changing anything....I will face everyday differently because of this. Thank you Mel..!
huge respect to you mam for saying the line " the word "comfortable" doesn't mean that you like it. It means that you are used to it......This line breaks so many problems I have.
This one was awesome!! I sent it to my daughter and I think it’s really going to resonate with her! Thank you Mel.
OMG, I so needed this. I too have ADD, but mine procrastination is there and is based I know in fear of not succeeding, the trauma from childhood where I was many times not good enough for my mom, and overwhelm from how far behind I have gotten in some things. Tomorrow morning, over coffee, I am having a conversation with myself. Pulled out my copy of the book and rereading Chapter 11.
You are the BEST 😍. I have ADD , procrastination habit , stress .. but I always listen to your videos
I lost focus on my creativity when my mom died in 2022.
I tried to follow a beading pattern that I really wanted to make and I just kept struggling with it until I had to stop. I still haven't found my way back. That perceived failure has bled into all the other creative attempts since. I lost confidence in my abilities. When I am faced with an opportunity to be creative I'm held back by the fear of failure.
Others know that I am capable, but I am paralyzed by the fear that I'm not anymore, or that I just got lucky.
Thank you so much it helped alot
I had a really bad day and this podcast just made me believe in myself and start again❤
Thank you for this episode. I have been working on something for months and every time I try to work on it, I end up getting nervous and not getting it done. The next time I attempt to work on it and if the same thing happens, I will remember these steps. You have given me the courage to get it done.
Good morning, Mel..
I’m 83, finances down the drain, have a way out.. not doing it. Your discussion in this video Re procrastinating is probably going to save my ass! Now if I could only figure out what the trigger is.. think maybe the “perfection” thing may be part of it. What more can I do to identify the trigger?
Thank you for all your work!! I’m subscribed.
For past one month, I been procrastinating on finishing my videos. When even I sat to work on it, my brain goes numb and I just get distracted by other non productive stuff. I just get frozen on very idea to start my pending works. I just stair for hours and just do nothing about it. And every night go with this guilt feeling that I just wasted on more time. Its slowly eating me up since few months. Tonight I gonna break thats cycle, forgive myself and start working on what stresses me out, the pending works. Thank you Mel.
Oh my gosh,I'm massively struggling with procratination,,,,,,,mostly from ongoing sleep deprivation!!!!! Am I in denial Mel? I've been in nonstop chronic physical pain & barely sleep!!! Prior to sleep deprivation,I minimally " procrastinated"!!!!
I’m in the field of creativity, and I really connected with what Vidi asked Mel, and this episode really hit me! Thanks for sharing this! Thanks for this amazing episode! You’re the best ♥
So clear!.. great podcast on this subject.Thank you!💯
I just discovered Mel and thing she's awesome, good stuff.
SPOT ON! THANK YOU! Hugs from New York.
Thank you Mel for giving us the tools to overcome this habit. It's incredible how powerful it was for me once I understood this in your video. I'll take it as a little push from my future self. I'll start today because, as you said, "Once you start, its likely you'll keep going.
Thanks a lot.
Thank you for your work and share it means a lot to help overcome the shit position we're stucked in 🙌
This really helped me understand procrastination more! I’m on my way to being an Action-taker! Thanks for the tips!❤
I am crying rn. Thank you for your help Mel.. From now on, I'll do the 5 steps.
Thanks for another amazing episode, Mel! And thanks again for being the only one to tell me that you love me. Some days you just need to hear it. Even if you’ve been married to someone for 20 years, and they refuse to say it anymore or feel it or show it. 💔I’m thankful for you and your words and your showing love. 🫶🏼🧡
I love Mel Robin's 💓 It's been long, this podcast truly made me feel like a part of the community. I kept researching procrastination and most of them were not as deeply addressed as you did.
I am all set to go on a doing mode 💪
No one cares about you
No one will do it for you
No one will come to rescue you if you don't rescue yourself 😢
These are the word you once said in one of your videos and they literally changed my life and I literally started writing my dissertation and I am still on it
Thank God!
God bless you 🙏 insha'Allah!
FINALLY! An in depth explanation that makes complete sense AND with the solution. Thank you so much Mel! You have a subscriber and someone who will be sharing. God bless you!
Thank you for this podcast. It helps me a lot with beating by procrastination habit.
listened to this twice in two days (and you're right - I shared also). I love this different perspective and it rings very true & accurate. Along with James Clear/Atomic Habits (pretty sure!), I really like the idea of the future self and just simply starting to act like (and consult) the future me I want to be...only by going ahead and behaving/doing like that person do I become that person...and build momentum by building the habits of that person. This also shines even more light on a procrastinating habit I have....to get stuck in the endless PLANNING of doing....which is so my 'normal comfort' procrastination cycle. Here I go....5 4 3 2 1, go.....
Mel you know me so well. THIS is what I need to work on. 😢😢😢😢
Voice of clarity. Inspires me everytime. Thank you. An Irish fan!
Thank you so much Mel ,I need that now..
Forgiveness is the key word for me..
Thank you give us amazing solutions to solve procrastination habit . Thank you mam again. And love you.
thank you so much this really helped a lot and you really look like Dove Cameron
You know something I've been told a lot.
People tell me "if your procrastinating it's because you don't like it and you need to do something else" Without knowing a proper response to that it feels like "You don't the know what liking something is anymore" every thought in your mind is questioned, you become lost.
this lady has been a god sent for me thank you for existing Mel
Life-changing info! Thanks Mel
Thank you Mel! Your the best life coach on the internet.
Thank you for shedding light on this coping mechanism 🙏thank you for your service 🩵🦋
You are amazing Mel. I Love you 😊
Iv been doing this with my website. It took me 3 weeks to finally pick and purchase the hosting. I started creating my website and I got to this place where I'm just stuck, not sure what should go where, what colors should go where, I can seem to get a decent photo of myself and I put working on it off all day long. I'll do it after I vacuum the living room, then the dinning rug, end up doing the upstairs, then I'm cleaning the kids room the playroom, throwing dirty cloths downstairs when I come down stairs now I should probably take those to the basement to get washed, oh I mise well throw a load in the washer, I come up stairs oh I need to clean the kitchen counters, I'll start the dish washer, well when I'm done cleaning up I'll sit down and work on the website. But it's just a never ending cycle I NEVER stop cleaning its exhausting I clean when I'm stressed
Thank you for all you do!!! I’m have a major habit of procrastinating and being a perfectionist. 9w1 much??? ❤❤❤
Same here!
OMG Mel *** Thank you a million times for this Amazing Podcast 👍😃: A real wake up call for me: even at 66. Read a 100 books etc on procrastination, but YOU just hit it straight on the nail head for me…. Thank you ,for always keeping it simple to inspire Me to make a difference in my and thousands of people around our Universe 😘🙏; I Love-all that you teach us 💖🎉😀: Thank you forYOU 💃❣️: Love from Copenhagen Denmark 🇩🇰,
Thank you for this❤ I finally got around to watching it😅 will try these
Thank you, thank you!!! You described myself so vividly, I had to pick my jaw from the floor!!
I am proscastinating while seeing proscastination videos at work
I am very good and speedy with house tasks like cleaning, cooking etc but I procastinate so much and everyday with my office work
I was 32 going threw change an had to have a complete thyroid removal and lost two vocal cords in the process of the surgery. If I had Not delayed it I wouldn't have got the cancer.. Please Mel we love you don't put your health off.
OMG! You were right, Mel!!! This one is huge!!! I felt like you were talking to me the whole time, amazing! Thank you ❤
It's amazing how easy it has become to put labels on everything we do in life. I wish you'd talk about how caustic labeling is to an individual's psyche... and how the ways we focus on those labels limit our true potential.
NEEDED THIS FOR SURE THANK YOU MEL
I needed this! I have been procrastinating to finish watching it, because that would have been the solution right there. Still needed to escape. I have just managed to pull my husband back from a divorce. This is my last chance. Due to this disease that is so entrenched, my husband ran out of hope.
I need to get it right. One thing I have realized is I must have been stressed all my life. Time to take control. Time to face the 5 minute rule head on!
Thanks for this episode! I could so relate to Vida’s testimonial. I put off writing because I figure no one is going to appreciate it anyway. Major imposter syndrome.
minute 40:07 strike so hard OMG! thank you!
Dear 🙏🙏 Dr. Mel Robbins. Thank you so much for the in-depth lessons that have been given. GB 😇😇
I'm trying to think about what Im stressed about and all I'm stressed about is the thing I'm procrastinating on. I want and need to loose weight. Everytime I try I fail almost instantly. It's like I think about how Im gonna do it and all the things I want and need to do to achieve it but as soon as I start I'm miserable and end up giving up. It's like I can't bare to be out of my comfort zome
Try keto or gluten free! See if it helps,carbs,sugar and alcohol all put on weight! Also if you eat meat try mock meat once or twice a week to help cut down on animal fats!! Cardio a few times a week!Good luck
The thing is.. in a way I agree that I'm avoiding stress in a way but I'm in such denial of what connection the two things have. When I procrastinate its always "I'll do it in an hour.. in an hour and a half" "oh but this is just so much more comforting to do." Of course, I want to do this project but at the same time in this moment I couldn't care less about it. I don't procrastinate my hobbies I procrastinate things like schoolwork and its eating me alive. I sit a week before an exam working on the topic but I get bored not even 10 minutes later and just turn on netflix and all of a sudden its the night before the exam and I'm studying a 50 page topic with two cups of coffee next to me. Am I just lazy? Because if I'm being realistic, I don't care about these topics enough for me to consider its stress. And then even if I do that gives me the comfort of not doing something, I blame it on everyone but myself. I blame the stress. I make it my excuse. What's wrong with me?
Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU for this episode! Holy wow! My daughter and I needed to hear this today ❤
Hi Mel. This is my first ever comment on your channel. I just want to tell you that I've been successfully wake up sharp at 6.45AM for the past one week. It was challenging to do it soon after the alarm but I did 54321 and it got me to get up. I am proud to say I didn't fail at it. I hope I can do better using 54321 for my business journey. And Mel, thank you.
Thank you Mel for wonderful podcast.
Thank you Mel!!! I have needed to hear this my whole life🫶🙏
Thank you for nice message
Thanks for sharing your Awesomeness, Mel. Best wishes!
I totally get it. We procrastinate about paying the bills because we can't face the fact that we owe more than we make. That thought leads us into a tailspin of anxiety and self doubt and the fact that we need to confront some things like why we are afraid to go look for a job. Or why are we afraid to kick the boyfriend out who is spending my money on the stuff he convinced me he had to have, like the car he needed so he could go out and get a job, which he hasn't done yet and I am afraid to confront him. So I totally get it. Thank you Mel!!!
Thanks a lot for this very informative video.