If the Emperor had a Text-to-Speech Device - Episode 29: Bad Jokes, Dad Jokes
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- Опубликовано: 13 сен 2024
- Base Script/Story by Alfabusa
Script Writers: Alfabusa, SpeakerD
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Video Editors: Alfabusa, VindicareAssassin
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Script Editors: Earndil, Verry, Nostalgia
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Audio Editors: Alfabusa, StringStorm
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/ galiant609
Art by:
SleepyDraw
sleepydraw.devi...
RudeRubicante
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RR...
Eliphus
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Garrot
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Zcee Nook
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Adeptus Adamaris
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Gods-and-Kings
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Soundtrack by:
OfficioAudiorum
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StringStorm
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Zegram as Magnus the Red
/ generalvonbunny
TheLemonGrenade as Custodisi
/ aintyouspecial
Failsnake as Cegorach, The Laughing God
/ failsnake
StellarElite as The Star Child
/ stellarelite1
SpeakerD as Asdrubael Vect and Inriam's Spectre
/ supersnakekick
SuperAnchors as Rogal Dorn
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Fresh as Urien Rakarth
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Oculus Imperia as the Abducted Chronicler
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Nostalgia as Boy and Ephrael Stern
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GingerSid as Announcer Harlequin
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ZoranTheBear as Leman Russ
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Fredrik Knudsen as Eldrad Ulthran
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Alfabusa as Random Dark Eldar
Earndil, Alfabusa and LillolGaming as Horrible Harlequin Audience
Quality Control by
Nostalgia, Earndil, Voy, ThunderPsyker, VindicareAssassin, DrWhite, Eliphus, Kochiha Ichihara, Garrot, Naerina
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Thanks for your continued patience, I hope you find this episode at the very least somewhat worth your time, despite the horrid clown humour.
We've already begun work on EP30, which will probably be the hardest episode to animate yet due to the amount of 'action' that happens in it. Wish us luck please...
Good luck then my dude.
Hi alfa!
Love you bruva. We will continue to worship your existence.
Good work laf
Most off your content has been worth a watch Bruva. Keep on doing it, but don't burn yourself out! Have fun!
The most grimdark part of 40k is the fact that Skyrim is s t i l l being re-released
I wonder who long it takes until it's gonna be released on my Phone...
Well Probably Run on Some servitors.
And Call of Duty still getting yearly instalments.
I want to see mod commu in 40k skyrim.Wait is moding game is tech HERASY in 40k?
Todd was the other person created by ritual sacrifice, eternally SKYRIM
The clown jokes may or may not be alfa's cry for help and desperation
Oh god he favorited it someone ask him if he’s okay
ＢA ᴢＩ𝒩ɢＡ
@@bravojr *B A Z I N G A*
@@bravojr *[many 'HA's]*
@@bravojr by the Emperor the fucking clowns are here
Bruva Alfabusa, you have posted
[horrid illegible clown word].
Prepare to be vibe checked.
Bazinga.
[Many ha's]
TOD HOWARD!
The Deceiver is among us!
Big Mood
11:07
I just realized this is why Emps refuses to actually detail his plan--he knows the Dark Eldar are listening
WAIT I HAVENT THOUGH OF THAT
OHHHHHHHHHHH
Holy shit...
By the Man-Emperor! You're right!
HOLY SHIT THERE WAS A REASON
But that means any thing he's even implied could be a form of intentional misdirection. 5D Chess holy shit
“I AM REINSTALLING THE PALACE!”
-Rogal Dorn, M42
According to the Sisters of Silence, we are in the M.42 now.
The battle of Khaine's Gate took place on New Year's Eve 999M41. It's M42 now
The Fun Part is, that I have never heard his voice so full of Emotion, for Rogals Standarts
I really need that to be clip'd on its own
Xaldir GodofGood should say how angry he is
If Magnus had just walked on stage and said, "BOTTOM TEXT" he would have won instantly.
This is true.
Or Magnus did nothing wrong.
Or weed eater.
so sad
Step one teleport kitten in
Step two mention tau
Step three profit
Genuinely surprised that Magnus does not have any library cards on him.
_ium_
Libarium Cardiums, you mean?
He should have pulled out a giant pile. Well here are one of these it?
Tzeench stole all of them from Magnus.
BAZINGA
Oh no.
Holy fucking shit.
The entire black library is _LITERALLY_ just reddit.
A library full of assholes?
@@psychicmane7636 yes
I am absolutely horrified.
Eldar culturals differences !
Makes sense when you consider that the harlequins are literally just theatre kids
I can't believe I got blueballed by the prospect of Magnus and Cegorach playing a children's card game
I honestly wanted to see them play a children's card game.
@@Shadowfire129 as did I
You mean paradox billiards vostroyan roulette forth dimensional hypercube chess strip poker
It was bound to happen in hindsight.
Same, but I have to admit that magnus had a sweet line for what he did there considering the state of the game.
`my city is falling apart and here i am, vibing`
- Emperor Nero, Probably
ayy i thought that joke too
More like caligula tbh.
@@kovi567 Oh come on that'd be every failed Roman emperor, including Napoleon.
Not really.
Umu!
11:07 So...A Drukhari did what even most Primarchs and even The Emperor could not...He triggered Rogal Dorn so hard that he tapped into his Black Templar side...
And people said he didn't have any Psychic in him... It looked more like his psyker side tbh.
Now I just have a theory that he shows no capacity for being a Psycher because he is so rational, calm and most specifically... blunt and brutally literal, because those are probably mental attributes that either prevent him from learning to use his Psychic powers, if he truly has any, or prevent him from even having any, if not also being a Blank maybe in secret.? The moment he gets actually stupidly angry, his psychic powers activate.
@@Slimurgical His canonical psyker power is being able to tell the warp to go fuck off elsewhere.
Wymar Sane Rogal’s a blank?
@@MultiBoxingKid Not really? It's a bit iffy. He uses the warp to tell the warp to fuck off. Fight fire with fire type of deal.
@@Slimurgical " if not also being a Blank maybe in secret.?" No, if I remember correctly the Fists have had Librarians (psyker marines) before the Council of Nikaea and after the Heresy. And he likely operated near both of them when they were running. Those psykers would not have been able to look at their father if he was a blank.
He might have some psyker powers. Sanguinius had some.
"Self-deprecation is a powerful form of comedy, but overusing it slowly but surely rips the soul apart" Cegorach be dishing out valuable life lessons and shit tho
Their could be no better example of this phrase then H3H3
Magnus: "You mean pointing out every pothole in a narrative isn't funny?!"
*ALFA STARTS TO SWEAT*
Considering Rogal Dorn was technically on part of the narrative since Episode I, I think pointing out potholes would be extremely funny.
@@Malfallax [bazinga]
I assume it was a jab at CinemaSins
@@koatam it was the least subtle jab considering Magnus literally yelled DING
@@koatam it's a good jab if that's the case
"You haven't planned that far ahead yet?"
That gave me chills ngl.
Anyone: Terra has been compromised by enemy spyware!
Rogal Dorn: *R E I N S T A L L T E R R A*
Remove Choas by turning Terra off and on again
11:17
WE MUST REINSTALL THE WHOLE IMPERIUM OF MAN
Even blood Ravens are going to be afraid of rogal dorn :C
Dorn simply rocks. He is getting me every single episode.
"Slavesayswhat?"
"What? ... NO!"
months later, I lose it every time.
I think that is about the second time I've seen Dorn frustrated. The first time was knowing Helbrecht exists.
Years later still loseing it
"I'm not much of a deceiver" - The trickster clown god who convinced the deceiver to eat his friends, and final clown bit is tricking slaanesh into destroying herself.
being modest in a trickster's line of work is a power play.
So he’s deceiving you into thinking he’s not much of a deceiver.
One doesn’t get to be The Laughing God without knowing how to laugh at ones self..
and how to manipulate others..
The Outsider was the one who ate other C'tan. Also, it is uncertain as to weather it was the Deceiver or Cegorach who convinced him, all we have from that time are myths and it is possible the Eldar gods hadn't even been born yet.
@@MythosTheSophist in actual canon yes, in tts canon they make it look like it was Cegorach who convinced the deceiver to make the others eat each other
At last, the screams have stopped. For now.
For now
"Welcome, welcome, welcome to another edition of........."
See you in a week
Oh they will not stop... THEY WILL NEVER STOP!
LET OUR VOICES BE FREE!
The bastard left it on 3 or so different cliffhangers we will be hungering for content like the death corps of Kringle hunger for food but like them we will ENDURE for it is the emperors will.
2 TTS episodes in 1 year?
Well... 2020 wasn't so bad after all.
This comment gives me existential dread.
@@alfabusa want some skooma
@patrick howard in all honesty i support this decision
Plus all the other awesome videos Alfa put out this year, and the WarHams spinoff
@@justindalton8701 You mean, you will FORTIFY this decision!
I feel like when Rogal started to reinstall the palace, his rage would have sent a psychic backlash through the galaxy. As it did the imperial fist, crimson fist, black Templar, and all his other gene sons would feel it. Then they would immediately drive and entire fleet to Terra, therefore setting in motion the reunion of dorn and his sons.
Not to mention the countless amounts of new fortifications and purgings that would take place on Terra.
Aren't Black Templars busy at Armageddon right now?
"DID SOMEONE JUST SAY LAST WALL!?"
- Imperial Fists/their successors across the galaxy
@@Matihood1 you know, I was under the impression that Armageddon was taken care of? There is still a war there no?
I thought canonically Dorn's warp powers are to "tell the warp to go screw its self", like a null but 1000 times more effective
@@Callsign_Bear yep, mah men Ghazghkull turned that planet into a giant all inclusive meat grinder! Orkz, Humans, Demons, even Necrons visit Armaggedon for a little krumpin'
the biggest plothole in the entire series is Magnus not having a library card.
Back in his loyalist pre-heresy days if his brothers got wind of him trying to negotiate with Eldar for access to some of their knowledge the Council likely would've happened sooner. And as for after becoming a Daemon Prince of Tzeentch, no Harlequin would let him anywhere near the library. Ahriman knows such troubles all too well.
@@Japaneseanimeguy ngl I know next to nothing of 40k lore, so thanks for this my dude.
@@Japaneseanimeguy That'd only be the case in cannon. This isn't that.
when he wanted to save his sons he sold his eye and his Library card. That's why he needed to build one for himself.
This... is funny
"i will re-install the palace" he says like the imperial palace, a structure probably covering 1/3 of earth's surface, is windows server 2008.
According to Rogal Dorn in episode 24, it covers 147 181 square kilometers, which is only 1/3465 of Terra's surface. Exactly the size of Nepal, in fact.
To him, it probably is.
@@Oliolli3 That's probably just the emperor's personal domain, like a keep in a castle.
@@Oliolli3 the palace is actually in the Himalayas or Tibetan Plateau so that might be where they are
@@zhess4096 so near china or inbetween france and italy
God, I love how they actually built that "satire" joke to actually become satire when Magnus ended up doing a CinemaSins on himself. Super duper clever, and it was an actual correct usage of the word!
It is more of a Nostalgia Critic with the gun and the awful jokes.
@@EduardoFlores-bt4fo "I eviscerate myself so YOU DON'T HAVE TO!"
@Nonya Biizwacs All of this great writing being just one of the many, many elements that have kept me coming back to this series (and the strange little community it created) since it started, absolutely fantastic.
Too tempted not to ask, but was "sensible chuckle" meant as a reference, by any chance?
If the Star Child no longer can use his abilities, doesn’t that mean that Comurah is about to be totally screwed by a legion of demons? Since it was his shield blocking their exit
You've either hit a nail no one else has thought of, or given Alfa a genius idea,
Pretty sure that shield is part of the city’s defenses.
@@aceofspadesguy4913 big golden shield over the gate of Khaine was popped up by StarFyodPeror, since he's been bubbled that'll go down faster than a Slaaneshi cultists hearing the word 'lube'
@@drewblencowe7457 don’t forget the Ultramarines
@@drewblencowe7457 so alphabusa was playing 5d chess with our expectation again?
Wait jaghatai is in commorragh, the ultra marines are searching for jaghatai, and the star child needs help in commorragh.......throne emperor you clever bastard
*Nobilitis ultramarini intensifies*
Certain Chapter Master: FAHK DIS ELDAR DAMN WEBWAY.
Certain Captain: Oh, Chapter Master, but I, Cato Sicarius am the most humbled, as I Cato Sicarius, received the great mission of finding a missing Primarch as I, Cato Sicarius....
JUST. AS. PLANNED
*ULTRAMARINE CHANT INTENSIFIES*
But what will the khan decide to do?
As one many “divine” bastards would say *ALL. ACCORIDNG. TO. PLAN*
You really don’t appreciate how convoluted a plot is until it’s been explained by an old homeless man covered in skulls voiced by a drunken Alfabusa
never expect anything from this show. Friendly reminder last episode was all about a binary political rap battle.
I loved how the eldar reacted to Magnus.
It's like opening your front door and the first thing you see is a tiger. There's nothing you can do about it, you just have to accept the situation.
His name is Eldrad
Perturabo: hey Rogal! Rooogal! How could you let spyware get planted in the palace, especially when you were there?! Maybe the job should’ve went to someone else!
Peturabo: EVEN I DON’T HAVE PEOPLE SECRETLY TRACKING ME!
Thanks to our sponsor ( insert VPN advertisement)
@@williamsantamaria2813 alpha legionnaire hidden in iron warriors forces (day 45 in the chamber they haven’t found me yet)
@@williamsantamaria2813 thats because no who matter cares for perturabo
Rouge Girl!
Omg
Has Skyrim been re-released so much that it’s just forming its own warp entities
Yes.
Skyrim literally works via Todd's sheer orky belief so it's not that far fetched
"It just w-ORKS"
@@avalon1393 IT JUS WAAAAAGHS!!!
This is Todds plan
The Emperor's charisma stat is so high he can deal damage with it.
Damn that's SOME Turning Check...
Vicious kindness
well, technically, he CAN be a warlock with a patron of HIMSELF
He was literally kill them with kindness.
Sorcerer/bard
Vicious not-mockery?
The fact Boy is now included in the main series gives me infinite joy.
ever since the the life of boy episode he is now loved
Boy has always been loved!
@@Deridus hee hee!
And he is starting his training to become an imperial fist, look how he tries everything to siege his break... (sudden realization) o no.
@@ThatGuyUpThere perturbado is gonna kidnap boy. admire his siege capabilities and try turn boy into an iron warrior.
lord dadorable goes full black templar...
and then beguins THE IRON CAGE ¡ELECTRIC BOGALOO!
So Asdrubael Vect was just introduced to the notion of genuine camaraderie, caring and respect, but because the Star-child used that as a weapon, Vect now knows that if he plays nice with the Star-child, it will literally kill him. It's ironic- in his attempt to introduce the Drukhari to the concept of kindness and positivity, the Star-Child taught them to abhor it even more.
Its more of that Vect thinks that he's way of existing in the galaxy is the only way Druhkari can continue on, which will be his greatest mistake for when ynnead comes.
Like that would stop the drukari from chasing a high.
@@tavernburner3066 Hmm, I think there are at least some drukhari, especially those at the bottom rung of their society, who don't particularly care for their usual thrill-seeking ways, and would abandon the chase as needless exertion.
Vect slowly turning into a dead body in a golden throne because the Star child is such a good person
"I ❤ Ancient Mongolian References."
I want Jaghatai's mug.
I bet he will save everyone in the Arena and be the next Primarch to Join the group
Wait, Bike Guy was Jaghatai!?
THICKENS, THE PLOT HAS!!!
@@fishpop according to the lore Warhammer one of Jakhatai's possible locations was Gommora!
@@nickpapadopoulos9978 I'm just glad we get to see another Primarch.
Loyalist Primarchs seen so far: Rogal, Lemun, Vulkan, Corvus and now Jaghatai.
Those yet to appear: Lion, Ferrus & Roboute,
Sanguineus is dead but we've seen a hallucination of him so he's technically appeared.
Dunno which Traitorus Primarchs have appeared aside from Magnus. Fucking Horus appeared in a gag, whining about wanting to exist again.
@@fishpop Also showed up in the April Fools episode, but whether that is TTS Canon or not(like a dream or something) I don't know.
Can’t wait for dadperor to hit vect with the “I’m not mad I’m just disappointed “ that would kill him in both ways
Shouldn't you be en route for the Special Meeting and Party hosted by Abaddon already?
How will that work?
Vect is too awesome to be killed like that
Lol he’d drop dead on the spot
OOPH.
“Oh, my gimmick deck is ruined...”
“Seems your deck’s weak to HAND TRAPS!”
Man I hate how right this is...
Rebel Scum Arguably best line in the series so far.
the fact that he used "ass blassom" too made it even better
Brings me back to when Magnus said: "The only intricate thing about this game is its ban list"
The Fool 0 I didn’t even realize it was a reference to Ash Blossom holy shit.
We finally meet.
Avatar Kindred...
i just realized. its thematic that Magnus's 999th mistake was his fall to Tzeentch, given 9 is the sacred number of the Great Mutator.
So that's why Man-Emperor is so harsh, Star-Child has his compassion. Well done, Mr. Alfabusa and Friends, you are good at tying up loose ends.
Big E made an anoucement in the form of a great speech stating the need of star child becoming part of him again and acknowledged said shard as his best part several episodes ago, then he got interrumped by Rogal's bluntness and kinda forgot about it.
I now want the Fyod-peror to be there for a round three with Uriah, because this is the part Rogal Dorn was unwittingly talking about when he said he defeated an army by reading out a haiku to them.
@@jacobsmith4428 Funny you mention that I got the exact same impression from seeing him here. You can really see how he's able to charm people into following him so easily
Also I like how Fyodperor himself acknowledges what a bad father the Emperor is
Pretty sure in the lore, star child was the 'good' part of his soul, while the part remaining in the chair is the 'lawful' side.
The reason the emperor rejected his humanity is because it stopped him from seeking his goals for humanity and this episode perfectly showcases how easy it could be to exploit the emperor's love for humanity
The fact that Rogal Dorn made literal mini forts out of the waffles made me almost fall over laughing.
And they are so good you need to successfully siege it before eating.
Don't forget boiling maple syrup over the parapets.
Best part Boy actually did some damage to them .
Between that and him killing that one fuck wit I think we might have a new Space Marine in the making.
Petrirobo would love them
@@genericname42 Perturabo was my schoolyard bully. I was lucky if a castle lasted past recess.
BOY MADE IT INTO THE MAINLINE TTS, *REJOICE AND BUILD A FORTIFICATION IN CELEBRATION!*
I can't, Nostalgia banned me from the Discord...
Who is Boy? Is that a character from the gameplay series?
@@Sammie1053 Boy is the one to hold the Vox Caster in the Emperors Podcasts. They are quite intertesting and add a lot of personality to the different characters
I will do this.
@@Sammie1053 there's a gameplay series?
Thought: The optimism isn't actually what's killing the dark eldar, the "anti-suffering" he emits is just negating all the "negative" energy they use to continuously feed their souls in order to outpace Slaanesh, who is constantly devouring their souls all the time anyways. Since he is essentially negating all suffering and replacing it with pleasantness, Slaanesh is free to rapidly devour all their souls. So it's actually just Slaanesh whose killing them, the star fyodperor is just making sure they can't gain any more energy to replace what they are constantly losing.
That's precisely what was happening. The positive energy he emits wouldn't kill them on it's own
That’s literally what they said.
Let’s not forget that Slaanesh has entered the materium
@@williamsantamaria2813 it touched the materium, but didn’t really fully enter.
I think he's also stalling for Khan ans smurfs to arrive and the Craftworld Eldar to finish their ritual
>Boy literally using a pickaxe, a drill, and a bomb to cut his waffles
He's learning fast.
Wow, at 7:06 Boy managed to actually collapse a waffle tower! Boy has a better track record that most Iron Warriors.
He is a future high lord so that is only natural.
@@keineangabe4434 They say the iron warriors are still working on the waffles Dorn made for them when he first met their legion, and only when they have succeeded in eating said waffles will they be capable of battling dorn once again.
@@keineangabe4434 Next Episode: Boy loses faith in Dorn and runs away from home to the arms of Purturabo
He's already basically a neophyte. Hell, he could very well become the new Slaughter.
I like how Magnus is actually a lot funnier and sassy when he's responding to someone genuinely and isn't when he knows he's on a stage.
Magnus's Ass Blassum was genuinely hillarious. He deserves more credit.
I’m the same way. I can make people cry in regular conversation but when I’m put on the spot it’s *awful*.
The Star Child in this episode is the LITERAL embodiment of
"Killing them with kindness"
Killing me softly...
with his words...
This*
It is really smart. It enlightened the fact Dark eldar being so much evil that they have to be kept doing evil stuff to not "die" and get eaten by slaanesh.
Bruva Alphabusa and his teams did a great job picturing it.
The other way around would have been to put someone "boring" who only speak truth ( like Rogal Dorn) against them. Truth is boring...lie is dream and excitement. The minute Dark eldar stop having fun would also means there death.
@@gigamesh780 it makes me wonder if certain kinds of Deamons could be affected in the same way.
The part of the Emperor's soul torn from himself to attack Horus.
I like how everyone casually accepts Timothy for who he is
A Wine Gnome Indeed
I think we're all to worried to know the answer to really go into it
Can we talk about how good Vect’s voice actor is? Some of his range and delivery is actually so professional. He really nailed emotionally conflicted dark eldar blood vomiting ruler
That's SpeakerD for you. Have you seen the WarHams yet?
@@Matihood1 I couldnt even hear Vect half the time, just one mad Skitari
@@plasmancer6104 I know right? SpeakerD is amazing. I think we think more of warhams at this point cause we listend to like 10? Hours or so of him YELLING ABOUT GRAIA BEING BAD
TheDudeWhoAlwaysStealsYourFood the time he killed the engineering crew re enacting his murders had me in tears
Damn he is good
Can’t wait for the odd shots of Rogal dorn “reinstalling” the palace
Rogal Dorn is no longer fortifying this position. He is reinstalling the palace.
he's performing a factory reset
I feel cheated that I couldn't stop laughing at the Skyrim joke.
Same here.
Then I took an arrow in the knee.
39,000 years later and Todd Howard is STILL selling the damn game.
Dude i was playing skyrim while watching this....i kept laughing until i was killed in a dwarf ruin XD
@@lilwyvern4 Todd Howard being a Perpetual who exists solely to re-release Skyrim over and over for millennia is _true_ grimdark.
This episode really does show a very deep and untapped side of the Dark Eldar. They are beings that try to cope with the fall of their own race by pushing it aside with all kinds of highs and justifying everything with nihilism. Yet all this is to make sure they don't become emotionally vulnerable to the things that makes them feel whole. And how all those things have been taken away. Like any junkies. They shoot up to dull the pain. In the words of Johnny Cash, "I hurt myself today to see if I still feel".
There's a line in a story where a former Drukhari who joined the Crafworld Eldar was worried that the pleasure of brutalising his enemies in battle would go away when he joined the Craftworld Eldar, but it turns out the opposite is true because now he has something to fight for.
Edit: here is the full quote
"He had feared that the spirit stone would have robbed him of his zeal for slaughter, but now he was given free rein, to unleash the bloodlust with the full force of something he had never felt before: righteousness"
That was Nine Inch Nails...
I love how the harlequin starts loosing it when custodisi takes off his arm since it’s a “very funny reference”
A toy story reference.
I think they’re counting on Magnus’ “luck,” which is funny to them.
Especially since Esidisi losts an arm to Joseph Joestar
That wasn't a harlequin. It was dark reaper (they were badass in DoW).
@@TheNemesis432 Nope, not a Dark Reaper. That's a Death Jester.
Teasing Jaghatai like this is just cruel....fitting.
Ahmed Samir It’s Commorragh. What did you expect?
Who was his co-rider?
@@akumaking1 it looked more like a trophy than an actual corider
Josh I’ve been asking that man. It looked to be a female human though so maybe just a partner? Anyways I hope we get some answers to this because that caught me off guard seeing a singular torso co rider
@@justinchalifoux4424 Jaghatai, lots of head trophies (Cuz it's the Khan, come on, he has to pimp his ride) and....the torso of a Saim Hann Eldar, which makes sense only the Saim Hann can keep up with the Khan....well...partially at least.
Magnus visibly grows when he's threatening Cegorach. His height really is entirely his choice.
I loved that detail. His size grew as his confidence did
The gamagoori effect
Well yes but a similar effect happened when Leman and Fyodor were arguing back and forth before they marched on the gate.
Isn’t Magnus basically entirely incorporeal anyway? He could change his physical form to look like anything
Like Big E
If I remember right, every couple of centuries or so Vect will have a captured slave brought to him for a meal and casual conversation about his past. This is very lore accurate to his character.
Just realized, Custodisi TOTALLY looks like the first ever Chaos Custodes in that getup. Noooot exactly helping Magnus’ image here...
Hiti67 Isn’t that why the Honk God sent Stern? To vouch for him?
In TTS 95% are Slannesh victims waiting to happen.
@@koatam so theres 20 custodes cause from what iv heard only kitten doesnt like that stuff
CHAOSTODES!
@@koatam Except they, ironically, despise Slaneesh.
The really important part of this episode is that Jaghatai Khan stopped and basked in the Emperors presence for a solid five seconds without moving. Truly a moving display of his progress.
Plus he's aware of the Star Child now and now things are coming together.
JUST. AS. PLANNED.
Where?
@@datkhornedog899 31:27
@@datkhornedog899 31:26
Dark eldar femboi
The reason there hasn't been a Down the Rabbit Hole in months is because Fredrick was building a God on a moon
Next Down the Rabbit Hole is just a live feed of him performing the ritual. Everyone who watches it will instantly become WH40k fans.
AHHHHHH IT ALL MAKES SENSE NOW, HE TEASED IT ON ADEPTUS PODCASTUS
Wait does Fredrick work on these?
@@LordRavensong High Seer of the Elder himself
You are WEAK
How magnus could have won:
*Walks on to stage*
“abaddon the despoiler”
What would Abaddon do?
*WHEEZE!*
Bring in the milk?
[HA's galore]
Falladdon the faill
The "You like jazz?" line by Magnus is a secret that lies within the series soundtrack itself. Cegorach's theme, Prime Clown (written by StringStorm), ends with a slowed down version of the Seinfeld theme, which Jerry Seinfeld got popular from. Jerry also starred as Barry B. Benson in the Bee Movie.
Alfabusa, you goddamn genius
I do also recall that one episode of 40k X-com on Zoran's channel, where someone dead-pan read out the Bee Movie script for like half an hour. Everyone (including myself) lost it at when they got to the line.
Yes, I too recall the Bee movie
Is this something most fans of the franchise already know ?
Just I hadn't heard of this till now lol and it's making me wonder what other little things I may have missed.
@@murderousmayhem6362 yes, most fans know of the Bee movie
It’s weirdly heartwarming seeing them care enough for the boy to give him a pair of shielding shades to protect himself
After that last voxcast? the fanbase would have revolt if Boy never make it alive.
Well Rogal was about to throw Hellbrecht faceforward into the eye of terror after he threatend boy
Maybe boy is the symbolic potential of even the humblest Imperium servants to not only keep up with powerful beings, but be a little respected by them not for any great strength or obscure wisdom or cool stats sheet but just... for doing their best and showing up every day with dedication and fortitude rather than fanaticism. Stuff like that is priceless in the setting.
I know the custodes said that self deprecation was easily relatable, but also the eldar literally had to flee their homes in craftworlds during slaanesh's wacky pink apocalypse and never returned. So another words, a tragic story where one can never return to their home was literally a big mood for the eldar.
I caught that as well. The way Magnus put that part of his backstory sounded really relatable for the eldar.
RIP a beautiful series we'll never see the end of.
Perhaps one day. One day I dream of gw being bought out by the animators of legend. Alfa, sodaz, the dude that made the astartes series I forgot, and all those who make Warhammer is good.
@@sirflapfla97 GW is doing rather well right now.
@@Hypogean7 heretic
Something I just realized, in any other situation, killing a villain by being so nice that your entire aura of goodness starts to hurt him would be the most ridiculous saccharine plot point ever. But since the Dark Eldar are the most ridiculously over-the-top teenager-tier edgy faction in a franchise that prides itself in being dark, them being overpowered by a Carebear stare is the most fitting thing that could ever happen to them.
The universe needs balance, and that balance is achieved by ridiculous Grimdark being cancelled out by extreme Noblebright.
Vect and Emperor are polar opposites after all
The main character of MLP would annihilate the Dark Eldar without realising it and that's a fact
@@fatalos6855 No.
@@GyaruRespecter
Fool.
You dare oppose the crab ?
I call it Wholesomehammer!
When Magnus said he'd "weaponize his damage" I was legitimately expecting him to embrace chicken jokes
SAME THOUGH
Magnus would be good at self depreciating jokes, if the jokes themselves didn't end up killing him
He was getting there, just cut short on the timeline...
He should have gone for impact over sustained barrage. Instead of designing his jokes around his failures (which while funny, we’re really just slapping tape onto a long line of small things) he should have aimed for physical/personal comedy. Essentially, insult himself, or talk at length about a single embarrassing incident. Insults and continual personal destruction have little presence, he needed presence.
Oh if he wasnt stopped there i would have to preserve his memory with a sculpture made out of ashes
Warhammer knowledge aside, the concept of someone breaking a hate-fueled entity with kindness is pretty great and was executed really well here.
@Mordred Pendragón Sanguinius
@@dekaw9138 space Jesus prime
Hi There sanguinius is Jesus Squared then?
You know...that kinda reminds me of SCP-999 and the Scarlet king. Since I believe that the Tickle Monster is a being of unconditional kindness and love, who is destined to fight against the being of absolute hatred and destruction.
"What? You havn't planned that far ahead yet?"
Fucking chilling
Knowing the emperor he probably did plan that far ahead
@@LAV-III well, I think his ideal was to lead humanity to evolve to his point, he was product of a forced evolution with all shamans sacrifice and so, but the rest need a good guide for such thing, and probably that's his plan, become the new "The Old Ones" but without making their fatal mistakes
Star Child just casually almost killing every single Dark Eldar with kindness.
I wonder what the death count is
Well almost
I wonder how that Dark Eldar chick and that one working for the Deceiver handled it.
@@JMandJJ7797 She is fueled by HA's HONK's and BAZINGA's, not suffering .
C'tan bullshit for the other.
Remember, he's /literally/ the Emperors positive human qualities, empathy, compassion....
Theory: Lord Adorable cooked for the first time in Millennia to reward boy with Fortified Waffles because boy got his first kill.
Holy shit,1.7K likes! Thank you so much!
And to celebrate his moving into the palace.
Yey
Dorn: Consume the waffles Boy, they shall help fortify your body with sustenance and nutrition.
Boy: Thank you, Dadorable. (attempts to break apart Dorn's waffles with a Power Kammer to no avail.)
@@Cage532 Boy just needs to kick the waffles into bite-sized chunks using his stair-walking legs.
B I G stair walk
YOU CAN’T JUST DROP THIS DURING MY CRIPPLING DEPRESSION. YOU CAN’T CURE MY CRIPPLING DEPRESSION ALFA, WHY DO YOU DO THIS TO ME!
*BECAUSE HE HATES US SOOOOOOOOO!*
Please be cured PLEASE be PLEASE cured HEAD DISEASE BEGONE by my MAGIC SORCEROUS COMMENT that I am THROWING at you
ALFA YOU PLAGUE RIDDEN OX, I CURSE THEE WITH THE LAST DRIPS OF ME SADNESS.
ALFA YOU HERETIC! HOW COULD YOU USE THR DARK ARTS
Despite the screaming this is wholesome. I love this community.
So this is it, huh.
May the incoming sales drop hurt GW in every way imaginable, and may the 3D printers live in the Omnissiah’s favor.
3d printers go brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
@@5ryans Yar har matey.
Oh mighty 3D Printer! I am but your humble servant!
PRAISE THE OMNISIAH
All praise the 3d printers
*"GO BACK TO PROSPERO, WIDE AHRIMAN!"*
Ohhh that is quite a burn, like what happen to prospe--- oh, I see.
To be fair, He did burn Fenris in Retaliation... well half of it at least.
My friend doesn't get the "Wide Ahriman" joke. Could someone please help her?
@@NightSkeptic If you're versed in anyway about 40k and the Thousand Sons's Traitor Legion, You'd know that Ahriman was Magnus' first-captain. He's the reason why the Thousand-Sons were turned into Mindless Rubrics before he was banished. I think the reason they call Magnus "Wide Ahriman" Is because of how similar they are... especially when it comes to failures... Magnus is a primarch, so he's bigger and wider... for the record, I'm not that versed in 40k myself. so if you wanna correct me, be my guest.
@@papounator8843 Also, wide Putin.
@@papounator8843 that's close to it, Ahriman is on a constant quest for the black library (which he fails at constantly) in an attempt to cure the Rubric of Ahriman that turned the 1ksons to dust.
“Mr. Wincest” could’ve just gone on stage and said Magnus did nothing wrong
He was too into chicken to say it
Hankbob Hillpants too easy
(Numerous clown HAs)
Considering he was just spitting facts, in the beginning, yeah he could, it would make sense.
LORGAR DID NOTHING WRONG
"My city is falling apart and here I am... *Vibing."*
Wow, that has literally been most of us throughout this year. *"THAT IS A FUNNY REFERENCE!"*
And here I munch
@@scotcheggable _Millions dead_
I live in England.
*Not relatable*
@@Lorgar64 we do not vibe here it is true, we just have failure all around us near constantly
@@scotcheggable Or as they say across the channel, "[French word]".
"Unlike others, I'm not that great a Deceiver"
Says the one who had deceived The Deceiver...
What if he only says that to deceive someone?
I love how a a series that was originally set up to be a meme shit-post satirizing the WH40K universe has now met the criteria to be considered an actual movie satirizing the WH40K universe.
Satire? This looks like canon to me.
No, this is canon. The official 40K stories are so bad, they are fan-fic satires of TTS.
It's pretty ironic as 40K was mostly satire at its conception...
Reminds me of DBZA. As that series went on, it gradually became less of a parody and more a comedic retelling of the original that reinforced the dramatic points of the original.
@@ShawndaPrawn Though with this group the fame hasn't gone to their heads so they can still make good content without being egotistical dickbags about it all.
If this is what the Star Child can do to Commoragh, then imagine what Vulkan do.
For people that forgot, in Ep. 25, Magnus stated that he could “feel the unnatural happiness radiating from his (Vulkan) surface thoughts”. Vulkan could probably just stand somewhere and any Drukari would just disintegrate.
Which would only increase his happiness. Creating a magnificent loop.
i need to see that
Kyosuke Machii *Crystal spine shattering noises as Vulkan hugs every last spiky knife eared friend to death.*
that dark eldar child certainly did
The only real question would be what would kill them first. Vulkan's unnatural happiness or their spines breaking?
Emperor Fyodor has almost killed an entire race with kindness. That's impressive.
Dark Eldar are a species that can only live off suffering so kindness is their exact weakness apparently. Then again no one has been able to spread such pure positive energy like the star child did.
Aren't they used to strange torture? Looks like everyone important survived it. Just a tuesday for the city. isk
Well, lads. This is it. The last of the main TTS story. I feel like screaming "FUCK YOU, GAMES WORKSHOP" the same way Magnus curses the name of Leman Russ.
Aah, I understand your pain.
Who knows, maybe GW rescinds their zero-tolerance policy in a near future. Stay optimistic!
@@freevertibirdrides7437 No .
We don't know that yet lads. Hold the line.
@@freevertibirdrides7437
"melts optimistically"
So... a Daemonifuge, a Daemon Primarch, and an Adeptus Custodes walk into a webway portal...
[BAZINGA]
@@falsehq1831 *[JUMANJI]*
A Naked Custodes, to boot.
Beep
[Numerous HA's]
"Annd my head is swellingbyKhainethat'sMagnustheRed..."
It's moments like this that I feel that Eldrad Ulthuan really needs a hug.
He kind of does, I mean imagine the stress and anxiety he has faced for over 10,000 years holy shit
Inb4 the Bro Trip arrive to deliver the hugs.
@@OmniGSage
I can see it, Vulkan being the wholesome hugging lad that he is
@@helvarstark4282 -I see great imminent pain in my future...
*gets hugged*
-Ho ho ho ho! You look like one who needs friends! Even if you're Eldar!
-ASURYAN'SDICKYOU'REBREAKINGMYSPINEPLEASESTOPI'MBEGGINGYOU!!!
@@helvarstark4282 The only thing Vulkan hugs eldar with is the warming flames of his well... flamer.
*_HOLD ON A MINUTE!_*
At 5:42 the hand trap Magnus conjures that reads Ass Blassum, it also comes with a slightly harder to see "No Joy". Out of context, it's hilarious, but if you know Yu-gi-oh enough you can recall that being a nickname for an actual card.
Ash Blossom & Joyous Spring the fox loli of endless No-U, known as one of the most cancerous cards of them all for its gimmick of screwing up practically any ability and deck, also known as "Ass Blassum of No Joy".
Holy - And I can not stretch this enough - _Shit_ that is one hell of a reference.
-Even though I'm probs doomed for the sea of comment to share this discovery.-
Um... no I think your the only one who noticed that
I just call her "Forehead-kun".
you see, these are the deep in jokes of Game shop games that make this so great. they are hidden in plain sight and just make them more brilliant when someone actually points it out, I wonder how many small jokes are hidden in this series like this.
@@angrymushroom26
Couldn't have said it better brother.
Now *that's* an esoteric reference.
I love how you can hear things like Magnus’s VA losing it when he mentions a lamp oil addiction. There’s so much character in this series, whether it be intentional or not, and hearing VA’s lose it when they say certain lines at least for me makes it that much funnier.
ROGAL DORN: I AM REINSTALLING THE PALACE
Me with a crowbar: WE NEED TO REINSTALL THE PALACE
@Legion of the damned GATHER THE LABOURERS!
BROTHER, I AM PINNED HERE! THIS BEAM WILL NOT MOVE ITSELF!
BROTHER BRING ME THE HAMMER
THE HEAVY HAMMER!
Brother I have brought the constrution dreadnaughts.
BROTHER I HAVE RETRIEVED THE MENIALS FROM ACROSS HOLY TERRA, TO WORK!
To this day, Custodisi is still named "Gorger Lord."
Oh, oh no.
Dorn, sadly eating a morning meal: "If cereals were truly fortified with vitamins, no-one would be able to break their fast."
Dorn Dad jokes. X)
My insides: "But I still need more vitamins!"
Dorn is so good in this episode. The "I'm reinstalling the palace" line had me dying.
Reminder that the palace is the entire Himalayan mountain range.
Jeff G *you really think that’ll stop him*
Dorn: "Yes"
Guys, I just realized why Kaldor Draigo is so chunk at 40:00, he isn't fat, it's because he still has that literal sun in his stomach from two episodes ago
Custodisi character development.
Boundaries. And being genuinely supportive of Magnus.
He was honestly wholesome on this one
I was honestly hoping he would give that sad boi Magnus a hug or something after his self deprecating onslaught. He doesn’t deserve the guilt he feels ;(
I like that all 3 of them have been showing growth lately, Custodisi in this one, Karstodes when he realized what an arsewipe he had be being to kitten (and being nice even to Boy in the last podcast) and Wamuudes in the sewer vox-log where he admits he has come to respect Kitten. Big-E galaxy braining the slow recovery of his imperium right down to the individuals.
@@myrixica4222 you forgot about Karstodes *actually learning to read*
Roid-Monger 101
Boundaries remember?
(Alfa posts)
The entire community:
" *ITS OUR BOOOOOOYYYYY!* "
Oooh. Marsy boys...
DIEGO GELINCK Yes?
@@liner5588 Bionic babies.
DIEGO GELINCK Uh.
That was a funny reference
Magnus vs Cegorach felt like a Reddit popularity contest
*THE MECHANICUS LITERALY MADE A GIANT WAFFLE COG I CAN'T EVEN!!! XD*
*proud binary noises*
if we cant consume it, we use it.
Can't even what
@@terminator572 _slavesayswhat_
Rogal: They like to flaunt themselves with easily sniped hats
TF2 players: *sweating nervously*
@ll RomanMapper ll
TF2 spy: Skaven yes yes, i mean kill blue team
This is the true reason the Imperium and Eldar are enemies. In the Imperium of Man, the higher your rank the *less* hat you wear on the battlefield
back in the old days hats actually had hitboxes
Me: Laughs in unique and strange quality stylish hats.
You are WEAK
How can you even come back from being called “Wide Ahriman”
Years of therapy
You don't
I just imagined Magnus turning into a wide Ahriman and just walking on a stage.... wide putin style
Same way Blood Angels players come back from being called *"Red Ultramarines"*
@@velstro With grace, honor and a revving chainsword?
I truly, genuinely hope that when Leman and Magnus meet again, Magnus gets really, really pissed, but then it turns out Leman has been searching for him to apologise.
I doubt it, since it's probably way out of character, but I think it would make for a really touching moment. Leman opening up and apologising for pushing Magnus as far as he did (maybe the Emperor put him up to this one), and Magnus realising that the Anger and Hate hes been holding on to have been holding him back.
“… Magnus…”
“***DOG~***”
“I know what you want to say-“
“Oh DO YOU, NOW?”
“So let me just say-“
*(Conjures fireball)*
“- that I’m sorry.”
*(poof of immaterial smoke)*
“… *w~hat?!*”
“I know you don’t want to hear that from me, but I mean it. I’ve been stuck in the warp for a bit, just by myself. With time to think, I found that there was so many things I could have avoided. I still don’t want to trust you, but I shouldn’t have pushed you so far. Above all… I never should’ve listened to Horus, that day.”
“… heh… guess that makes two of us…”
“Heh…. It’s fine, if you still want me dead. I can’t blame you… but-“
*(extreme psychic back pain)*
“***GAH!! **WHAT THE FUCK!**”
“That was for my spine, Russ. At least now, we’re kind of even.”
“Fuck you, ye milksop.”
“Fuck you too, ya furry.”
“…”
“…”
*(mutual cathartic laugh)*
*_"W E L C O M E T O T H E B O O K N O O K B O Y S!_*
side note: Can we all appreciate Emps teaching The overlord how to play Paradox-Billiards-Vostroyan-Roulette-Fourth-Dimensional-Hypercube-Chess-Strip Poker like how someone would genuinely get friend of theirs interested?
I found the best tactic to get someone into a game you like is to let them beat you with a combo like Emps did.
Positive vibes > competitiveness is the key to rallying a friend to your favorite game.
no he already knew how to play, the idea was to lead him into a sense of security by thinking he was playing an inexperienced player but the Star Child's inherent goodness won
@@Sigismund697 huh I thought he was just trying to save face and pretend he already knew how to play since Emps stated it's a game played by divine beings.
@@brian126 yet Magnus knows it
the joke is that YGO (basic) is really easy to play but only gods seem to play it
I hope alfabusa know I almost threw my phone at the Skyrim bit
I guess he knows
Hmm fish
"My city is falling apart, and here I am... *vibing."*
Ugh, so damn good.
Relatable. That's literally been most of us the last few months
@Mialisus _millions dead_
@@phantomwraith1984 That's the entirety of Western Civilization right now.
I love their take on the primarchs. They could do a little better with Russ, but the rest are spot on. Especially Magnus and Dorn. They managed to turn them into funny character while maintaining the core of the characters from the lore. I love it.
Are we just gonna ignore that Magnus had the balls to threathen Ceograch himself ?
Well done, sonny boy
Dad we both know he’s as arrogant as you. He in many ways is the most like you.
Yes my emperor, pretty bold oh him
I mean, Magnus *is* pretty powerful.
@@Matihood1 but thats like demigod vs full blown Eldar god right?
@@Northbravo he’s more than a full blown god, Ceogorach has fought against the chaos gods and is one of the very few Eldar gods to live, He’s existence of mockery actually saved him from the fall, I think he even stole a sword from Khorne. The Eldar that believe in him are saved from slanesh when they die, he’s more than a god.
The year is 2030. Alfabusa has become fully syndicated and has big deals with streaming content providers including Google, Amazon and Disney. Fans the world over now pay homage to the genre-defying, mind-bendingly sophisticated masterpieces produced under the Alfabusa brand. However, due to an obscure clause buried--as a joke--in one of the oldest still fully and inextricably binding agreements dating back to the days of the Alfa Legion: there is a contractual condition mandated to be present in all future Alfabusa productions . . .
They STILL cannot end without, in some form or fashion, the incredibly unnerving and invasive presence, of Karl the Deranged.
How they got Disney to go along with that is anyone's guess, but there sure are some seriously traumatized children out there as a result.
I love it
I'll join the legion
And now for the weather: There is a tyranid swarm moving west and an ork Waaaagh coming from the south. However, schools will still be in operation.
It is recommended that you stay indoors and be sure to watch Netflix to keep Slaanesh sated.
This concludes our broadcast.
We will leave you with Karl the Deranged and his noise marines, enjoy.
You know, the future doesn't look so bad.
Tbh the Karl moments are some of the highlights to me.
Karl can not be contained, only through occasional cameos can he be temparally isolated. The Disney merger was created specifically so he could be stuck in a perpetual cameo dual with the cgi spirit of Stan Lee.
Cegorath's Skits:
1. Basic slapstick
2. Gmod physics fuckery, followed by YTP-style photo distortion
3. Eric Andre kill jokes (or joker reference), stock image prop, followed by skyrim reference.
Truly, a succulent time capsule of internet humor.
He's basically the epitome of Millennial and GenZ humour
@@phantomwraith1984 I'm a Millennial but I liked more older humor like Spaceballs, MST3k and Monty Python.
I think the 2nd one is the "Duck.exe has stopped working" video. Could just be a Loud=funny
Screaming Wario as well.
@@NoCareLuke yeah, definitely got metal king boo vibes.
King misprounouncing everything except "Supreme Grandmaster Kaldor Drago" is obscenely funny to me.