Should You Be Ashamed Of The Booty Call?

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  • Опубликовано: 29 сен 2024
  • Use these easy-to-follow dating tips to get any man. Click Here: www.gettheguy.c...
    ***
    This week's LOVELife episode is all about booty calls. Are they okay? Should you have one? How do you communicate you want something more if you do?
    Website: howtogettheguy.com
    Facebook: / coachmatthewhussey
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Комментарии • 198

  • @dexiexo2199
    @dexiexo2199 9 лет назад +69

    "it's not 11 o'clock when he calls me, it's 10:30"😂😂😂
    booty call is a total insult, I love to humiliate the guys who do that to me LOL

    • @Vixinaful
      @Vixinaful 6 лет назад +2

      Yeeess, yess yess! I need some advice from you on this!

  • @Bloquita5
    @Bloquita5 10 лет назад +5

    Dear Matthew,
    Thank you for the abundant lessons I have learned from you. You are direct & clear. I love your style because it empowers people by bringing great discussions & insight to the table. Each & everyone one if your videos have kept me interested from the beginning to the end. I find that some of the topics you discuss, usually are discussed lightly by others but I LOVE how you dissect the topic & discuss them so beautifully. As a woman, I truly appreciate listening from a man's perspective about relationships & love. I wish my father would have had your wisdom so that he would have passed some if that wisdom to me & now I know there are great men like you out there and that is who I want for a partner. Your multiple advice have steered me away from doing something I know is not good for me & this video hit the nail on the head. Thank you Matthew & much love to you.

  • @nikkinhatvi777
    @nikkinhatvi777 10 лет назад +50

    The only reason I watch this is bc of the "boo-ee" call..... 💖💖💖💖

  • @jennakenna7252
    @jennakenna7252 9 лет назад +5

    I like this side of matt not only did he tell it like it is but he did so in plainly but in a humble way in fact he was rather sweet.!!! Maybe he was having a good day otherwise he would have been tempted to say BITCH EEK yikes don't do that in the future

  • @lowkeyvictor7174
    @lowkeyvictor7174 9 лет назад +2

    Incredibly clear!

  • @DjDiLaRa
    @DjDiLaRa 8 лет назад

    yeah, thank you :)

  • @mollydavidson9561
    @mollydavidson9561 10 лет назад

    What about type 3?????

  • @RaquelFantasia
    @RaquelFantasia 9 лет назад +35

    That's complicated when suddenly you feel like a sexual object that will always be there when he needs or when you realise you are accepting that because it feels good, you feel desired and you are less stressed in your daily life.
    Despite all pleasure you can get, receiving the best kisses you had in all your life, going to heaven several times, sleeping together, hugging each other and watching every single sunrise together, holding hands when you leave the house and say godbye ... there will be a moment that you feel empty and you want much more than that... Things have to work at night and daytime. Don't expect a future in that relationship when you just meet that guy at night and much less when he says "I don't like to sleep alone. Can we sleep together tonight?"

    • @bostenlemaire6895
      @bostenlemaire6895 7 лет назад +1

      Booty calls are about playing. Not about feeling lonely.
      When you feel lonely, the booty call is not the answer. This is a deeper problem.

  • @Melodys11
    @Melodys11 8 лет назад +16

    I LOVE and adore my bootycall. We mutually prefer to not be in a relationship, it's worked out perfect.

  • @lahdeedah87
    @lahdeedah87 10 лет назад +78

    I've been there and he's totally right. shame on me for thinking I didn't deserve better. I'm glad I got out of that situation. As soon as I did I began to find some happiness

  • @nstruebluey39
    @nstruebluey39 10 лет назад +46

    I love how the English say the word "booty call" lol but he's right.

    • @lethallines5898
      @lethallines5898 6 лет назад +1

      Sage lol it's like "boo-e" call so damn cute.

  • @yvonneconybeare5923
    @yvonneconybeare5923 9 лет назад +43

    Booty call isn't limited to people you don't know very well.
    You can be in a relationship, a marriage even, even a very, very long marriage, and suddenly realize you haven't been on a date in months, or years, and/or he rarely talks to you about anything anymore unless you bring up the kids, he doesn't trust your judgement about simple things anymore, isn't really interested in your day or what you do, far more interested in the newspaper and his work than any playful subject you bring up. When you do activities together with friends, he focuses on them, and you feel ignored. You go most places without him, because he'd rather catch up on the bils, or work.
    He hasn't returned your flirting for ages, because he's been too stressed, but you get into bed together at night, catch up on the kids, and then he expects sex. And the sex is good...the only thing you do together where you feel noticed and appreciated.
    And you have to decide if it's OK for you to pass your life that way - or seek better companionship in life going forward.
    And despite everyone telling you that your relationship is the best they know, you seem so relaxed together and your kids are so great. Friends are are shocked you'd question a 20 year relationship; because everyone likes your husband - he's so friendly and kind and appears to treat you so well, as well as you treat him, and isn't that rare? If that's not a good marriage, what is?
    You might decide that booty call at any stage in your life is unacceptable. You start the conversation, and realize he's been answering you in ways Matt would call "red flags:: he's too busy to "date" and he doesn't like to sleep alone....and you realize he's just not that into you anymore. There are so many more things that are more important than doing things with you, that interest you...
    So you'll have to move on in your life, and that's neither easy, nor uncommon in marriage.
    Booty call is something one must be honest about, and root out at all stages of a relationship...I'm sad to say.

    • @paulamartinas7503
      @paulamartinas7503 7 лет назад

      Yvonne Conybeare Sorry if I ask did you ever tell him that you are going for a few days away with a woman friend for a short holiday no kids?Or that you might live in 2separate houses as you need to work on a project/he has to take over the household for a while?

    • @Ribbitplease
      @Ribbitplease 4 года назад

      I’m at the stage where I’m wondering if marriages are a must. Reading this just breaks my heart 💔

  • @sharongoodman7817
    @sharongoodman7817 9 лет назад +47

    This is so where I'm at right now. He's been honest with me but I've fallen for him and it's killing me. We're friends. We have an amazing connection in every way. But he won't commit. It feels like shit.

    • @sharongoodman7817
      @sharongoodman7817 8 лет назад +1

      In the gutter 😢

    • @sharongoodman7817
      @sharongoodman7817 8 лет назад +3

      I realised I deserve better. I told him some home truths. He didn't like it. End of!

    • @sharongoodman7817
      @sharongoodman7817 8 лет назад +18

      +Melissa Elizalde i just said he was treating me like an option and leading me on which he denied but after 6 months of going out but never meeting any of his friends I said he was just playing me. He didn't deny. He was just silent. It took me a long time to get over him. Similar has happened with someone else more recently and I'm in the same boat but I'm just about to get in my life raft and sail away from him. It's put me off giving anyone a piece of my heart again for a while. But I'm worth more. And so are you x

    • @fruityeva
      @fruityeva 4 года назад

      I'm in this situation right now.

    • @careyroberts1303
      @careyroberts1303 4 года назад

      I was there. He was honest I didn't listen. Were not together anymore and now I feel like shit. Part missing him a d part what I did to myself

  • @RoseKimberly
    @RoseKimberly 10 лет назад +15

    Such a great video. Amazing!

  • @lilithhera3716
    @lilithhera3716 8 лет назад +18

    I really liked this. I got out of a relationship and he kept saying "I don't want a relationship" and his actions said other wise I though he was just saying that and he wasn't. We got into many fights after our relationship ended cause he kept calling and wanting to talk but still kept telling me "I don't want a relationship" which caused me to rehash it every time we talked. This video made it very clear to me to listen to what he is saying and I can move on. Thank you for your advice I am a huge fan!

  • @biquettesauvage1
    @biquettesauvage1 6 лет назад +66

    I am an adult woman and single. I fall in love very rarely, because i am very indipendent, not very family oriented (had a terrible childood so family is not an ideal for me), and I can figure out to spend all my days with a person JUST if I REALLY like him, and love him. So I don't settle easily, and therefore It happens that I have long periodes where I am single. But during these periods I still miss the contact, the warmth, the sex and the interaction with a partner, so I usually have what i prefer to call a "lover" rather than a booty call (it is derogatory of something that remains a beautiful, even if temporary, human exchange). It is a strategic way to get along with my needs. I just wanted to point out that it's not for validation at all that i take a lover. It is because women have a libido as well as men, they have a sexual life, nature wants that, and that is a need. Most women don't admit they have this need because of the shame society project on female sexuality, when it is disconnected from love or motherhood. And this is sad.

    • @sztejerhmm9316
      @sztejerhmm9316 3 года назад

      Jesus, i feel very similar to you right now. I've never been in love, i hardly develop stronger feelings for a guy, but I've been in a relationship and i ended up hurting a guy, cause i just liked him, while he felt more. I've been avoiding relationships ever since cause i don't enjoy feeling guilt. Recently I've opened up to a possibilty of fwb but i have a feeling that the guy i chose for this wants a relationship, so i guess we should talk soon😶

    • @Sirhc2023
      @Sirhc2023 Год назад

      As a gay male, I rarely have sexual encounters on daily basis others do, I prefer to feel connected to the individual, this started back when I was better 7 to 9 years old when. I developed that connected bond, fast forward to my adult years I only had 4 real deep connected intimacy with different individuals started when I was 28 all the way to now I'm 44, when I hookup with other random guys it's not the same.

  • @bellalady2730
    @bellalady2730 7 лет назад +7

    yes this guy I met recently lied to me that he likes me I was falling in love only to find out he just wanted sex so heartbroken right now shame on him😎

  • @Bajaandblonde
    @Bajaandblonde 5 лет назад +22

    Good advice! Spot on about it all. Sometimes women do settle for this just because they want the connection like you said. Even though he says he doesn't want a relationship, us girls still stick around to see if we can change his mind. I think a part of it is the game, the chase. Girls seem to get attached, that's what hooking up and pillow talk do to us.

    • @eilenkatarinalunde2969
      @eilenkatarinalunde2969 Год назад +1

      Yes, that’s why I never get involved in this!

    • @Bogna1
      @Bogna1 Год назад +1

      @@eilenkatarinalunde2969 Clever girl 👋

  • @Chiungalla79
    @Chiungalla79 6 лет назад +10

    I usually like what Matthew Hussey says. He is a brilliant man. But there is one point I think he is wrong.
    Maybe he hasn't thought this through very well, or maybe it's more comfortable for his own lifestyle to think this way.
    If a woman tells a man that she wants a serious relationship (aka is falling in love).
    And the man tells her that she is not going to get what she wants from him.
    And he sleeps with her anyway, worsening her situation in doing so (because of all those biochemical reactions and emotions involved with sex). Then I think the man _is_ to blame.
    Yes, she needs to take responsibility for her own choices. But so does he. He takes advantage of her situation and her vulnerability. And I would never go as far as giving him a free pass for that because she could or should have said no. Because it's really really hard to say no in such situations.
    He preys on her weakness and does so with little to no concern for their wellbeing. And saying that she is doing the wrong and stupid thing and that the man was fair, is like telling a drug addicted that the drug dealer isn't doing anything wrong, but he needs to stop buying the stuff. Of course, he needs to stop buying and using those drugs, but still, the drug dealer isn't innocent.
    There are limits to free will and rationality. And this is very clear when it comes to love and other drugs.
    And having casual sex with someone who is clearly in love with you is (nearly) always a bad thing to do.
    As having casual sex with someone whom you love is (nearly) always a stupid thing to do.
    That's why both sides are to blame. The one side for their selfish behaviour, the other side for their naive behaviour.
    That said, I still think that Matthew Hussey is right about telling the woman to make rational choices. I'm 100% in line with him on this one. But that's not because those men are not to blame. It's because they are to blame, but there will always be men like this, you can't change them all, so you are better off trying to change your response to them.

    • @tijafication
      @tijafication 4 года назад

      Very well said, completely agreed.

    • @Nah-ah
      @Nah-ah 4 года назад +2

      Yes, he thought it through and I agree with him completely! The point isn’t about what the other person or man is doing to a woman, preying on her etc. If a woman called Matthew up and asked for his advice he would say move on, you deserve better because the guy is only in it for the sex. Matthew isn’t going to coach her to coach him to be upfront and honest and stop preying on her. He doesn’t coach people how not to prey on women or their weaknesses. That’s not what he does! He powers women to take control and take their power back... And that’s why I agree with what he said. You can tell someone to stop preying on another’s weakness till you’re black and blue, or you can simply be grown up and make grown up decisions to stop wasting your time. I’ve been through it myself with a booty call hook up many yrs ago. The most empowering thing that came about was realising I played a part in my own misery. Took my power back! Best thing I ever did and never looked back!

    • @Chiungalla79
      @Chiungalla79 4 года назад

      @@Nah-ah
      You didn't came close to understand what I have written. So your response makes little sense. Your loss.
      Maybe, next time, try to understand what the other person actually wrote instead of jumping to a disagreement.

  • @semt9
    @semt9 10 лет назад +14

    I'm kind of a mix of 2 and 3! I want something more but i'm also afraid of something more. It seems like being brave enough to try and have something more is the only solution to both those things...

  • @roxanamaria6925
    @roxanamaria6925 5 лет назад +6

    I literally put him off by not meeting him at 23;00 iven he said he finish work at 22:30 😀😀 I said clearly can’t make it that late . As I have to work early morning! I don’t make myself available to him when he wants .. I suggest we can meet next day as I finish early from work .. but he insisted he wanted to see me in that night .. so as much I like him ,, I have to respect myself more .and shame on him !

  • @Btrutaltruth
    @Btrutaltruth 7 лет назад +4

    Men getting validation from telling (and most often making up) stories about how many women he had sex this week with - it's very bold sign that he is extremely low value man. Than's how women see him. Plus men who cannot build up a healthy relationship with one woman basically lacking self esteem, confidence and many other manly qualities in themselves.

  • @jadetice875
    @jadetice875 5 лет назад +3

    Personally, in the past 3 years I’ve had 2 ‘serious’ relationships. They both ended and now I want the consistent sex with someone I trust without the relationship without the commitment. I have career goals that require most of my attention, so finding a sexy man who’s great in bed would be nice without the headache. But now finding this has become a headache in itself... I know a man in particular who I want to be my ‘booty call’ but I fear that he may be too good of a man to be just a booty call, I fear I may ruin my chances with him all together by telling him I just want a booty call. Can a guy catch feelings while casually hooking up?

  • @1Skorpia
    @1Skorpia 9 лет назад +5

    I had friends that want a booty call to EVENTUALLY lead to a relationship. They think if they put time in he will see what "a good thing he has" and turn to her.Guess what he might settle for a bit..but hes on the lookout for something better. So now shes in a relationship with a cheater.

  • @grapiken7766
    @grapiken7766 10 лет назад +37

    I hate the idea of this. Casual sex is so empty. It's like masturbation but using someone else's body. The whole fuck buddy thing is horrible, like dogs on a street corner. I don't understand how people can be so physically intimate yet so disconnected at the same time.

    • @AS-pm2be
      @AS-pm2be 7 лет назад +3

      Gra Piken I know right. I mean how can they find it cool. I mean nothing works for me if there are no emotions.

  • @xmylove19
    @xmylove19 10 лет назад +15

    The way he says booty call

  • @ungphuc
    @ungphuc 8 лет назад +5

    yep yep yep! This is the truth that so many girls in America aren't taught! Also, ladies, no matter how sure you are that it's love at first sight, please never ever sleep with him on first date. The longer you can wait, the more chance you can have to get rid of potential players.

  • @MariannSierra
    @MariannSierra 10 лет назад +7

    He's spot on E-VER-Y-THING. I'm just happy I'm finally over that stage! It's important to know what you want and deserve out of a relationship.

  • @cagatayyilmazer3908
    @cagatayyilmazer3908 9 лет назад +15

    I have 4th category to add if I may; people who do not have the time for a relationship but seek out for the affection that can be presented by only a female partner. I'm not sure if this seems shallow or selfish, but I do not believe while being honest about it to the other person, trying to pretend that there is something serious while only being able to spare maybe one or two nights a week, could be considered a better option than keeping things casual. Regardless of the whoever we are, I believe everybody seeks a little bit affection and sincerity, but a relationship shouldn't be the only path to this, and if sexuality isn't considered a taboo than having such closeness with someone should not be considered as disrespect or insult to a woman.

  • @athinarivera1285
    @athinarivera1285 8 лет назад +13

    Hello women out there! This is so true don't try to make relationship out of a booty call. Just enjoy the ride!

    • @bcvc3365
      @bcvc3365 6 лет назад

      literally! lol

  • @ClassicGlamDoll
    @ClassicGlamDoll 10 лет назад +21

    How can i booty call you? Haha

  • @Lyrvana
    @Lyrvana 8 лет назад +8

    what's the difference of Friends With Benefit and Booty Call?

    • @Csizzle800
      @Csizzle800 4 года назад +1

      Lyrvana friends with benefits is you hang out too outside of sex. Booty call it’s literally you only see each other for sex only.

  • @sakuramoon5774
    @sakuramoon5774 7 лет назад +5

    Bang on when you mentioned that even though some women may be in group 1 and not necessarily looking for a relationship (right now), they are not however validated by sex... Thus, it would still be nice to receive texts in the time apart etc not just the "hit up text", eg hey what are you doing tonight, come over etc", because well, i know my standards are higher than that, i'm not there to fill in his time on his convenience. This is a problem, because one can still feel used, even if you are a woman who is the first type.

  • @queanb33
    @queanb33 10 лет назад +8

    My issue is that every guy I meet sees me as an object. Its not every once in a while, its a bunch of men in a row. Whenever I end it with a guy to move on to someone else for something serious, its practically the same guy! I even tell them I'm not looking for a booty call and when I confront them all they say is that they like me and that its not like that. What in the world am I doing wrong?

    • @mikec1945
      @mikec1945 10 лет назад +11

      Like attracts like. You have said you are seen as a sex object. So you should ask yourself. Do you act like one? Why do you think guys see you as one. "if you keep on doing what you have always done you will keep on getting what you always got''. You could observe what girls who don't get used like this and be the same as them. How do you dress, talk, act .

    • @queanb33
      @queanb33 10 лет назад +2

      You're right and its been something I've been working on. I don't think theres anything wrong with the way I dress accept maybe wearing crop tops every once in a while. Once I heard someone say "I meet no one but me" and that hit home. I've been on this for months and little by little I'm figuring things out. Thanks I appreciate the advice

    • @Vixinaful
      @Vixinaful 6 лет назад

      I know...Same here.

  • @Fufue_13
    @Fufue_13 9 лет назад +6

    Love love love this episode! And I agree with u 100z. Know what you want, state what you want.. Women if you and your "guy"agree it's only about sex, DO NOT catch feelings. If you're starting to feel some type of way..let him know, if he's not on the same page. Leave! it's all about always knowing where you stand and being HONESTLY happy and comfortable with it. Simple..that makes a perfect "booty call".

    • @bostenlemaire6895
      @bostenlemaire6895 7 лет назад

      I would recommend actively seeking out a partner and putting yourself out there. It's the best way to not catch feelings for your booty call.

  • @mssummerrose1
    @mssummerrose1 8 лет назад +8

    this should be said so more often: be honest and take the truth

  • @teighamcewen1951
    @teighamcewen1951 7 лет назад +3

    how about the women who give the booty calls and not just receives?

  • @rafaelnadalismyboo
    @rafaelnadalismyboo 10 лет назад +9

    Boo-ey cawl. LOL

  • @msreinevilla
    @msreinevilla 10 лет назад +4

    THIS IS WHAT IVE BEEN LOOKING FOR! Questions answered for me!

  • @kuronekoojo4793
    @kuronekoojo4793 9 лет назад +4

    I learned from this video that, I have to LISTEN to the guy for warning signs. Thanks, Matt!

  • @Amateur_Pianist_472
    @Amateur_Pianist_472 10 лет назад +3

    I had a friend with benefits. One big problem is that we've gotten so incredibly close that we're now besties. We both keep failing at finding a partner and recently he got rejected and came to me saying he missed me and feels close to me. Sure we're close friends but it's gotten to the point where I want to be either normal friends or partners. Don't have to be lovers just partners. It's been eight months. I also miss him because I need my best friend. I've just had enough and just want one or the other, not in between.

    • @jennakenna7252
      @jennakenna7252 9 лет назад

      He could be saying that just for sex after all u guys were never a couple so wt hes really saying is booty call in a guys way lol

    • @Amateur_Pianist_472
      @Amateur_Pianist_472 9 лет назад +2

      I know his position a lot better now and he knows saying stuff doesn't get sex it was always simply if I was horny or not. he freaks out if we do anything mildly physical cuz he now thinks what he did to me was wrong. he wanted to be normal friends so we are. he asks me for my company and isn't after sex and even stops himself if we do something mild. we still are close but sex has caused issues to the friendship so idk what will happen.

    • @caroletimpson-wiltowski3731
      @caroletimpson-wiltowski3731 9 лет назад +1

      Amy Lorenzo Sex can destroy a friendship. Good for him to treat you respectfully now. Sounds like you want to be more than just good friends though? Are you being fair to yourself to keep seeing him? Are you preventing yourself seeing other fellas whilst spending time with him? No matter how close or amazing a relationship you have with him, are you better off not seeing him for a while?

  • @neraknerak1
    @neraknerak1 9 лет назад +5

    Thank you, you're a dating genius!

  • @ShoroukA
    @ShoroukA 10 лет назад +8

    AMEN!

  • @heartquaked
    @heartquaked 10 лет назад +4

    It's amazing how passionate you are about relationship advice. Thanks for your videos!!

  • @dr.mindful2345
    @dr.mindful2345 3 года назад +2

    I needed to hear this. I stopped being a booty call and finally moved on.

  • @SmilesMalone
    @SmilesMalone 10 лет назад +3

    Is this just an online show? Or is it an actual radio show? If the latter, what radio station is this on and when does it air? I'd love to listen in!

  • @loveish22
    @loveish22 6 лет назад +2

    But every guy say that they don’t want a relationship and I’ll find out later they got a girlfriend

  • @WordDrink
    @WordDrink 9 лет назад +13

    Thank you Matt. That made me feel a whole lot better. With the previous guy, I got out the moment he started talking about how he didn't want a relationship, but with the last guy, he was leading me on and I thought he was serious about me, but I got out when I found out he was lying BIG time about a lot of things. But this video taught me not to feel bad about it, that it was his wrong to lead me on, and that I shouldn't beat myself about it. Thanks! I'm only glad I took a chance and I'm ready to take another :)

  • @ceptikartupelji2110
    @ceptikartupelji2110 9 лет назад +14

    'Women don't validate themselves through sex the way guys do.' Bullshit. Matt, if only you heard how we girls talk amongst ourselves when you guys are not around... I think you are rarely wrong about things, Matt, rarely, but this time you are.

    • @daliwood12
      @daliwood12 8 лет назад +4

      Agreed, Cepti... especially middle aged women and/or even modern women of all ages who have gotten past the slut shaming mindset, definitely like bragging about having multiple guys on a string and unabashedly enjoying sex with multiple partners (in succession or at the same time). And women can be more graphic than men at recounting their sexual tales... no detail is spared! Lol. You know what they say... men multiple their past, sexual partners by three and women divide them by three... regardless, both sexes are getting down & dirty!!! I agree with Matt about the convos that need to happen in the context of booty call situations. His advice never lacks thorough thinking or practical solutions.

    • @FreeSpirit47
      @FreeSpirit47 8 лет назад

      +b dal Generalization is always incorrect. People of any age, race, or any other category have many different, varying attitudes about everything. The only time people should be put into a box is when they are dead.

    • @daliwood12
      @daliwood12 8 лет назад +3

      +Brenda B I didn't say ALL of anyone. I was citing examples of certain types that debunk the generalizations that Matt was making about women and men.

    • @nthabimphayi1504
      @nthabimphayi1504 8 лет назад

      I totally agree with you.

    • @teresilas6659
      @teresilas6659 8 лет назад +1

      You'd be suprised. I brag. I tell my guy mates over pints at the pub. it's alg :)

  • @Vixinaful
    @Vixinaful 6 лет назад +2

    Am I the only one who gets fukn PISSED? A guy who sees me as a sexdoll good for nothing else, gets me pissed! Devaluing me like that? I'm an intelligent, funny and beautiful woman who deserves better, damn it! They can try all they want with me but they're getting NOWHERE with that shait!

    • @aryastark3148
      @aryastark3148 5 лет назад +1

      A guy might also think you're an intelligent, funny and beautiful woman, but doesn't want a relationship for a number of different reasons. I've had guys who think I'm fantastic as a person but don't want to be in a relationship, and vice versa. It's not so cut and dry as someone not appreciating the rest of you vs full-on wanting to make a life together.

  • @gmusica711fm
    @gmusica711fm 10 лет назад +3

    He's the first type of person, I'm the second, and we're both a little of the third type...Oh boy.

  • @biswita
    @biswita 7 лет назад +1

    Matt is absolutely right...I had a married man make the booty call and I asked him to get an escort service, I was not bitter merely matter of fact. Such guys want free fun not pay for sex

  • @jen4yahwehsal176
    @jen4yahwehsal176 2 года назад +1

    I'm a widow I'm lonely still grieving the death of my husband and he took full advantage of it to make things worse I developed feelings for him I'm praying to stop..I was a housewife for 27 yrs I am so ashamed

  • @strethy
    @strethy 6 лет назад +1

    Also can we talk about guys who only call at night just for dirty talk but aren't interested in talking to you normally as a person..

  • @jayzelleboyce9965
    @jayzelleboyce9965 7 лет назад +2

    What about the girl who enjoys booty calls and just wants to chill and be open for sex and just be friends and no pressure... Strings... But no pressure

  • @y2m3e.45
    @y2m3e.45 7 лет назад +2

    can't tell you how much I appreciate this video. it literally made me decide on the spot what I need to do. thank you so much :)

  • @kaleeforrester
    @kaleeforrester 10 лет назад +1

    i wish i would have been smarter about relationships in college, and/or thought about the stuff you said in this video. I feel like this would have saved me a lot of heartache then (and obviously now).
    Thanks Matthew :)

  • @silvanaramirez9941
    @silvanaramirez9941 5 лет назад +2

    It’s adorable the way Matthew says “booty” :)

  • @stephanie4336
    @stephanie4336 7 лет назад +2

    wish there was a way to private message a question

  • @Sweetlady1916
    @Sweetlady1916 10 лет назад +2

    Honest and empowering message! Best advice I've heard in a long time regarding dating.

  • @miraesperitu1808
    @miraesperitu1808 8 лет назад +1

    so true..wish i watched this vid before..i was in that situation before but am out now...

  • @sudeshnabhattacharya1706
    @sudeshnabhattacharya1706 8 лет назад +1

    What if something like that happens to a girl within marriage and as per his wish and not her consent. And then the guy files for a divorce. How do u tackle that?

  • @ayaanwarsan
    @ayaanwarsan 5 лет назад +1

    I've never wanted a British white guy this much 😂❤️

  • @evakristiansen8335
    @evakristiansen8335 4 года назад +1

    wow this is so weird. Usually I really agree with Matthew but not this time. I have a very close friend and we love each other but are not right as a relationship. From time to time if we are both single, and we feel like it, we have sex. I know this is rare, but we have made it work for more than 5 years now. When one of us is in a relationship the flirting goes completely away and we respect the boundaries that comes with a relationship. I still feel love, and we see in each others eyes that we just want the best for each other no matter what.

    • @leeleeleeleeamanda
      @leeleeleeleeamanda 4 года назад

      I think this kinda case is very rare...He is just saying in the most situations.

    • @manan-543
      @manan-543 4 года назад

      @@leeleeleeleeamanda basically friends with benefits

  • @lorraine8306
    @lorraine8306 3 года назад

    Men will take what's on offer and women will look for the fix-er-upper.
    None harbour mature relationship building blocks.

  • @ziyou3494
    @ziyou3494 11 месяцев назад

    Nothing will stop them from calling but you don't have to answer.

  • @rainbow9987
    @rainbow9987 2 года назад

    Should be ashamed? It depends I think it’s perspective. It depends how you view the person. I think If I find him hot and he sow me as a booty call , I will be hurt. If I found him ugly or average I would not give a fuck.

  • @Betterboundariesnowteensupport

    Its just a bid for quick connection the booty call. Its the ultimate I find your outside hot or as most people find most people hot its I cant get anything else. Or the players I asked they stopped believing in love they got burnt by their first love and vowed never to give their heart again.

  • @anitakimsingh4896
    @anitakimsingh4896 Год назад

    Am unfortunately number 3 as divorced and single plus I would find hard to have relationship I have a son who I look after and only goes dads not much . I don't have family or really any friends in the state I am living due to I only came to state due my ex husband when me was married otherwise I would stay in my home state . I kind like the man I sleep with but we only be like this due am 13 years older than him , culture and reglious reasons , his parents would never approve of me . In his culture unfortunately am like used car no body would want to buy . Due the fact am divorced and I can't change the culture been like that from the start even if I was same culture still same thing , double standard if a man was divorced he get remarried to a woman who never been married but if women been divorced she pretty much stays that way she might get lucky. I know very nice lady who been trying have relationship and even on religious site still gets men just wanting a booty call only due to fact she is divorced. I just hate it when the man hookup with always turns around says I wish you was younger and never been married or divorced he keeps saying that why ? I can't change my age for anything. Why he keeps my bathrobe under his pillow when I went take it home he like no the way said no was kind strange when I asked why he said smells like me. I don't mind if keeps it only cheap. Then last week he took my jumper home to wear . He sick at moment and been keeping me updated. He even said sorry he sick. As normally hookup at least 3 or 2 times a week unless I've gone on holidays. Then he has wait to I return.

  • @LittleSister1981
    @LittleSister1981 7 лет назад +1

    I've been there and done that..🙈I'm glad that I ended it sooner rather than later..I deserve sooo much more than that!

  • @kirkegaming9542
    @kirkegaming9542 Год назад

    I recently got used. Had a date and we were super into each other, we just chilled at her place and then stuff happened. She asked to see me again for another date and then she just went dead. I feel used and now more than ever i dont trust women.

  • @ResilientWon
    @ResilientWon 8 лет назад +1

    So on point. More people NEED to hear this!

  • @ASummersStudio10
    @ASummersStudio10 10 лет назад +1

    To the core...This is true and honest.

  • @uncannyvally7022
    @uncannyvally7022 6 лет назад

    Am I the only one on here that thinks that the booty call isn’t that bad a thing?? LOL

  • @shafalipatel4050
    @shafalipatel4050 6 лет назад

    Just had a booty call from a male friend but thanks to your advice before and your advice now im not falling for it anymore. If he cant invest inme normally then im only gonna be normal! Youre a star!!

  • @saramoreno6642
    @saramoreno6642 4 года назад

    Women should not be ashamed if they only want a booty-call. Don't settle for a relationship just because you crave connection, get in a relationship if you ACTUALLY like that person, but if you are not emotionally avalable nor like that person to have an actual relationship, then don't slut shame yourselves for only wanting sex.

  • @lonibennett6124
    @lonibennett6124 3 года назад

    Pretty much tells me by his lack of consistency after I hook up😬I have been this guys booty call and him mine for 20 years I’m just now starting to catch feelings but I don’t know if they’re real or not because my husband passed away not even a year ago🙏

  • @sudeshnabhattacharya1706
    @sudeshnabhattacharya1706 8 лет назад

    When you like tea.. someone whom you love , makes your favorite tea, can they pour the tea down your throat when you are sleeping?..Why can't men be educated about this universally. This also applies to you know what. So following the English tea principle, when you cannot forcibly make some one to have a cup of tea ,can you. And what if they don't like to gulp down the hot tea for someone who never had tea before. You know what I mean. I am so embarrassed to bring this up.

  • @mobiwobi4740
    @mobiwobi4740 2 года назад

    You are just amazing. Thanks for all your life transformative advice.

  • @leslielelaind4997
    @leslielelaind4997 3 года назад

    I’ve been with mine for five years and I love him🤷🏽‍♀️idc

  • @kaciemichelledevaney8299
    @kaciemichelledevaney8299 5 лет назад

    I would say there is a number 4 too and you kind of touch on it but not really. Women or men, mid 30s who are getting out of a long and toxic relationship or marriage who want to have fun, feel sexy again, get emotional validation from the opposite sex telling them how amazing they are, beautiful, hot, (even when they know it's not going anywhere long term.) I think for this particular group the booty call as you say or casual hookup can be extremely healthy and therapeutic.

  • @andreal4347
    @andreal4347 10 лет назад

    But, if you have a booty call, won't you be considered a girl of low value instead of high value?

  • @bcvc3365
    @bcvc3365 6 лет назад

    and if you're dealing with a category 3 person, you shouldn't think that you can change them or waste your time in the hopes those walls will come down. Be a willing participant, celebrate life, and know that it's just a fling that could end at any moment. Learn to let go.

  • @gabriellet307
    @gabriellet307 7 лет назад

    Nothing to do with the video but the link you provided to get the emails isn't working. I've checked my junk folder and it isn't in there. I've sent it/set it up 3 times but it still isn't working

  • @crose55082
    @crose55082 4 года назад

    I don't want a relationship and he doesn't want one either. All though he just said he doesn't know where he wants to take us. He has also called me a shoulder to cry on, I called him out on that and I thought we were friends. He told me he values a shoulder to cry on more than friends. I get mixed messages from him.

  • @adp5839
    @adp5839 7 лет назад

    Just what I needed to hear...if you can't get him, enjoy him! As long as your head is straight. Thanks Matt

  • @amiramahgoub
    @amiramahgoub Год назад

    My X already gave me BIG red flag. So I moved on and I'm fine with that. #👍

    • @amiramahgoub
      @amiramahgoub Год назад

      Men are so freaking crazy and cheap! They just keep coming and asking for the same thing!! To be honest with you Matt, I don't see gentlemen anymore.😱

  • @balmoralballetto
    @balmoralballetto 8 лет назад

    Thank you Matthew it's black and white and I appreciate this advice but I feel my situation is grey! I wrote to you about this for our Valentines date! I love all your wonderful advice and want to let you know that you rock! Mary

  • @Saskiamq
    @Saskiamq 10 лет назад

    No booty call at all… are doing sports because you have bruise on your left temple… don't play to hard.😏

  • @komalchaudhari2046
    @komalchaudhari2046 5 лет назад

    U are just the most amazing guy, i have seen so far, to the point, and u explain in such a way, that just clears our head, love from india...

  • @samanthaabrahams7376
    @samanthaabrahams7376 8 лет назад +1

    This !!! 😩😩💔💔😢😢

  • @LadySilverWolfe
    @LadySilverWolfe 10 лет назад

    Very good points! I really appreciate your videos. Keep up the good work! :)

  • @snootyzulu
    @snootyzulu 8 лет назад +1

    good advice.

  • @jeanievong7287
    @jeanievong7287 4 года назад

    This guy said we should start causal but treated it like a booty call and it was painful. I never knew it would turn out like that. I decide to leave

  • @re-createyourdiet6370
    @re-createyourdiet6370 8 лет назад +1

    Goddddd that was so good

  • @yitongliu9852
    @yitongliu9852 5 лет назад

    So fucking right, I wish I could see this earlier

  • @TheMakeupballerina
    @TheMakeupballerina 10 лет назад

    He is a 3, and I am the 2 because of that :) Thank you so much for the Video, you really helped me!

  • @orianbazov
    @orianbazov 10 лет назад

    matthew i learn so much from you and your wisdom . i thank god for you..................:)

  • @sophiasweets4697
    @sophiasweets4697 10 лет назад

    AMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!! To all that is said , was said and have been said in this video Matthew! I Believe!

  • @alexavasile1970
    @alexavasile1970 7 лет назад

    Got to argue with that, my booty call became my boyfriend.