Thinking about my experience, what I found out is that it is really hard to get men to trust you in the workplace, but once day do, they are very supportive. However, women will see other women as a threat and start making their lives hard. For the most part I have experienced that women are the enemies of other women.
but that is also a result of our gender-biased society. we are taught to see other women as adversaries, since we are little girls. it takes a huge effort on each one of us to overcome this barrier. you should try it too =)
@@alineparreira3192 I think you are a very special case .No one tells their children to hate others of the same gender,no matter you are a boy or a girl.
1. Focus on your values before you do anything that scares you 2. Be brave, have and show mental and moral strength to face danger, fear, and difficulty
So on point! Thanks so much. I was also so scared of being a leader till I became one. Ladies, you can do it..its not rocket science. Just remove the fear factor and you are good to go...don't forget to develop yourselves, that's the only way you can learn the ropes. Good luck👍
What a great talk, she is so right. How can it be that women make up 50% the population and do not have proportional representation in leadership positions? Incredible! I really hope individuals become aware and willing to encourage women to lead. Go women! You CAN do it!
nobody is going to gift you a leadership position.. most men who are leaders also happen to be founders of their company.! men invent more than women, that's why there are more male leaders
@@amelia1507 Just to make it clear I am talking about the top leadership jobs. Reason: Women are not as willing make the insane effort it takes to get there. Most men aren't either.
Excellent talk. I am a woman who never feared leading and, from a very early age, knew that the thing I wanted to do in life is lead. The issue I've found is that the kind of leadership the teams I lead need is that which helps them organize, communicate, and collaborate, (which I'd argue is the "ideal female leader"--that of "mother" to her team--makes sure the kids keep their rooms clean and get along properly) and the kind of leadership they get is militant, dictative, and distant (which is a "father" to his team role, but don't get me started on our society's daddy issued). Often the white male lead I work with will not have an understanding of what is wrong and what needs to be done (because the team lacks organization) but thinks it's his job to TELL everyone what to do, sometimes even just doing it for them because he lacks the ability to communicate what needs to be done. When I've brought my leadership skills to the team, it becomes organized, team members understand who to go to when they need what, and everyone knows what they're supposed to be doing, but I don't get recognition from the male lead. It's like he himself lacks support and guidance from his other male leads and superiors. The issue is that men are rising into these leadership roles BECAUSE of their appearance (white male = looks like a leader = must be a leader) but they don't actually know how to lead the team (due to lack of training or competition instead of collaboration with their peers) so they become insecure when their team gets the support they need from me. Mind you, it's not ALL the team needs, it could use the direction and foresight these male leads should be providing via their job description, but I end up being all they have when their "traditional leader" isn't fulfilling his responsibilities. In summary, what I'm suggesting is that the female leadership problem could be resolved by fixing our male leadership problem. We just have a leadership problem, people.
So much truth in this talk. That riddle pulled me right in from the start. Thanks for sharing your hard-earned insight and shining a huge spotlight on the leadership gap for women and men, and how we can bravely work together to confront it.
I’m tired of putting the responsibility on women - telling them to lean in. I have leaned in, and I was told to shut up. Not that directly, but it was the message. I’m nearly 15 years into my career, and this has been the repeat message from the company I worked at for nearly 10 years. Happy to report I’ve recently left, but again, women cannot solve the problem of inequality by themselves.
I am in 15%, didn't even take a moment to answer.....and didn't even realize there was a stereotype, I guess that's because our family doctor is women and in India, atleast doctors have a balanced gender ratio
8 yrs ago.. when I first got into college, I was a very hyperactive girl. I never had any problem with the girls in my class.. they loved me.. in fact they would come to my hostel room to spend time with me, work on assignments with me.. but the guys are totally different. They would say things behind my back like "she is doing all this for attention", and other worse things I can't even say here.. fast forward now I am an introvert.. afraid of talking.. Honestly, since childhood I grew up in a hostel.. I seeked love that I missed from family since I was away from them.. But I am content now with who I am.. because men are still the same way.. they won't change.. I still aspire to be in a leadership position. I will just lead the way I am now
In the riddle it's not only about mind models. It's also about language expressions. In other languages you would know that the doctor is a woman, because there is a word for that.
I hadn´t to "get the riddle right", since I remembered the answer from my childhood - If memory serves me correctly, I firstly read it in a book called "Metamagicum" written by Douglas Hofstadter.
*To me most guys can theoretical do dating, though they mess up practically. And it has more to do with society in general than the actual situation. Everyone seems to be under societies influence of madness and that to make everybody so stressed out. So womens behaviour is not at all the reasons why dating is hard. Still women seem to have the only power to transform society on a large enough scale and thus to take dating and the whole ways we live our lives to another level. Therefore I like to assure you women: you have all the time and space to make decide over your own life, to open up and do what you like! The universe supports you and society needs you! Especially in public leadership and as initiators lies your strength! It may not be easy to overcome the trauma of centuries of exploitation and marginalisation. Though the rewards are thousandfold for all of us! You can do it! You have the power in your decision. Connect. Do small steps. Every contribution to this task is such a big gift of your unconditional love! I thank you deeply from my heart for existing and all good you ever did. For your patience and companionship! For your individuality and for your deliberate intentions and your wisdom! YOU ARE STRONG!*
I am here because Women are destroying my view on the Women whom have been GREAT inspiration for a simple man like me. The Women who became my FOSTER mother's, the Women who are my LITERAL WONDER WOMAN. The women who stood up for me when I wasn't able. Those women I cry for , those women I would die for, those women I fight for.
The most dangerous thing for any team to have is a fearful or insecure leader. You probably shouldn't be a leader if you are feeling that way...period.
Male leaders - Vision, Aim, Plan, Apply Female leaders - Vision, Aim, Plan... waiting to be approved by the society, waiting to be accepted, waiting to be discovered, waiting, waiting, waiting...
What if they were from women? Would you be surprised still or no? You obviously have this perceived notion that it would be men with no surprise. It could've been women that made most of the negative comments.
The only issue I have with women in leadership, particularly politics, is that most (if not all) have been APPOINTED to their position instead of voted in. Look at VP Kamala Harris, NY Gov, Supreme Court Justice, etc. There will be more respect for their achievement if they are voted in or not given all out preferential treatment.
This is exactly what someone who isn't a leader would say. Your my leader when I say your my leader, and its not because I'm feeling generous. It's because it's obvious.
Did it occur to anyone that the riddle itself is gender-discriminative? The feeling of not able to operate on one's own son can happen to men too! Why is this feeling supposed to be associated only to women?
Right, if you would have told the riddle with mother was dead in the car, you would probably have thought of the surgeon as the mother, because in the current context that was the last thing introduced that made sense.
Women aren’t in leadership… it’s not that hard a riddle… women are 50% of frontline combat…. It’s not that hard a riddle… women aren’t 50% of brick layers…. It’s not that hard a riddle.
Wow, an interesting observation, I have never seen a male principal in my pre school, school, Jr college, college or pg ....but it's extremely rare to see women chairman or secretary or treasurer of organizations.....it's like women can be ceo but not the founder.....or something and it makes sense! But still a better representation than the US
How do you / How would you reconcile a " Rifle " culture 🤔 with the leadership of your gender , ., female . Is the Rifle a Corporate mission ? Is it an Industrial product ? anyway Has feminism ever thought about it ? What is the priority of the Nations on Peace and Good will amongst the Signatories ? Southern Cross ✝️ 👌
So... it is believed that every position needs to be occupied by an equal number of women and men? Why? Brick layers are 99.9% men. Why should half of them be women? I disagree with the presumption that equal numbers of men and women in leadership roles should be even the goal. If men and women are equal in every way, then why does it matter who tends to be in what leadership roles? Let the cards fall where they may.
This is all very nice until you are a woman in leadership and realize that the space, if not ready and open to diversity and women leadership, THE SYSTEM will make it quite impossible for you to thrive. Not everything can be center on the individual.
Prabhupada: Well, according to Vedic conception woman is never offered leadership. But experience has shown that woman’s leadership has not been successful.
God, it's so boring listening to her. It is all full of story telling and so few actual information coming across. The interesting part starts at 8:28. before that the first 8 and something minutes are summarized as follows: "Women fare better in simulations of leadership in a controlled environment, but if asked about their leadership skills men are more sure of themselves."
That's not to say that she's only speaking to women. But she's just speaking in a way that is natural to her. Speaking conversationally or using stories let's people mentally place themselves there and lets them think about about it could effect them.
Women are not meant to lead. Well I don't think a teenager can lead even though he might seemed to be responsible. Her trying to convince me is the same is her telling me she can live for 1000 years.
Thinking about my experience, what I found out is that it is really hard to get men to trust you in the workplace, but once day do, they are very supportive. However, women will see other women as a threat and start making their lives hard. For the most part I have experienced that women are the enemies of other women.
but that is also a result of our gender-biased society. we are taught to see other women as adversaries, since we are little girls. it takes a huge effort on each one of us to overcome this barrier. you should try it too =)
@@alineparreira3192
Who taught you that?
@@alineparreira3192 I think you are a very special case .No one tells their children to hate others of the same gender,no matter you are a boy or a girl.
@@alineparreira3192 nobody teaches their duaghters to hate other women. Women just do that. You cant blame that on men
@@marrs5151 We can. Many men indeed do that. They bring conflict between women to make their place.
1. Focus on your values before you do anything that scares you
2. Be brave, have and show mental and moral strength to face danger, fear, and difficulty
Hello dear, please i want us to be good friends if you dont mind
I love learning about women leadership. Anyone else?
D Moreno-Guzman I do too I think it’s quite interesting
yes
Tomboys.
So on point! Thanks so much. I was also so scared of being a leader till I became one. Ladies, you can do it..its not rocket science. Just remove the fear factor and you are good to go...don't forget to develop yourselves, that's the only way you can learn the ropes. Good luck👍
What a great talk, she is so right. How can it be that women make up 50% the population and do not have proportional representation in leadership positions? Incredible! I really hope individuals become aware and willing to encourage women to lead. Go women! You CAN do it!
nobody is going to gift you a leadership position.. most men who are leaders also happen to be founders of their company.! men invent more than women, that's why there are more male leaders
Because many women are not leadership material.
@@BarrySlisk May I ask why you think that is, though?
@@amelia1507
Just to make it clear I am talking about the top leadership jobs.
Reason: Women are not as willing make the insane effort it takes to get there. Most men aren't either.
this is the most condescending bs
Excellent talk. I am a woman who never feared leading and, from a very early age, knew that the thing I wanted to do in life is lead. The issue I've found is that the kind of leadership the teams I lead need is that which helps them organize, communicate, and collaborate, (which I'd argue is the "ideal female leader"--that of "mother" to her team--makes sure the kids keep their rooms clean and get along properly) and the kind of leadership they get is militant, dictative, and distant (which is a "father" to his team role, but don't get me started on our society's daddy issued). Often the white male lead I work with will not have an understanding of what is wrong and what needs to be done (because the team lacks organization) but thinks it's his job to TELL everyone what to do, sometimes even just doing it for them because he lacks the ability to communicate what needs to be done. When I've brought my leadership skills to the team, it becomes organized, team members understand who to go to when they need what, and everyone knows what they're supposed to be doing, but I don't get recognition from the male lead. It's like he himself lacks support and guidance from his other male leads and superiors. The issue is that men are rising into these leadership roles BECAUSE of their appearance (white male = looks like a leader = must be a leader) but they don't actually know how to lead the team (due to lack of training or competition instead of collaboration with their peers) so they become insecure when their team gets the support they need from me. Mind you, it's not ALL the team needs, it could use the direction and foresight these male leads should be providing via their job description, but I end up being all they have when their "traditional leader" isn't fulfilling his responsibilities. In summary, what I'm suggesting is that the female leadership problem could be resolved by fixing our male leadership problem. We just have a leadership problem, people.
I relater so much!
This is the best TedTalk I've come across. Well done speaker. Amazing job. This is soulful content.
So much truth in this talk. That riddle pulled me right in from the start. Thanks for sharing your hard-earned insight and shining a huge spotlight on the leadership gap for women and men, and how we can bravely work together to confront it.
there is no leadership gap between women and men when you include mothers as leaders, there is nothing brave about being uninformed and miss-directed
I have learned a lot through TED Talks and found them truly interesting but this presentation was by far the best. Congratulations!
Perfect.. Women are the pillars of the society and corporate culture. Loved your talk.
what about men ??
So wanting to step outside the box and fly.
Enjoying these talks
I’m tired of putting the responsibility on women - telling them to lean in. I have leaned in, and I was told to shut up. Not that directly, but it was the message. I’m nearly 15 years into my career, and this has been the repeat message from the company I worked at for nearly 10 years. Happy to report I’ve recently left, but again, women cannot solve the problem of inequality by themselves.
yess
Most female bosses and biz owners I’ve seen only hire other women so what’s the complaining about?
true so much off leaning in we have to do ...
Yes.
We need women like you. Appreciated Alexis🎉
Thank you so much! You are a true inspiration. I loved this Ted talk❤️
Focus on your values, really great advice.
I am in 15%, didn't even take a moment to answer.....and didn't even realize there was a stereotype, I guess that's because our family doctor is women and in India, atleast doctors have a balanced gender ratio
Outstanding! Alexis - you are brilliant.
Holy sh!$. I have no words, thank you for this 🙏💕
I got the riddle right immediately.. why is it so hard ?
Like she said most don’t some do I got it wrong😂
What a great talk....loved every bit of it.
8 yrs ago.. when I first got into college, I was a very hyperactive girl. I never had any problem with the girls in my class.. they loved me.. in fact they would come to my hostel room to spend time with me, work on assignments with me.. but the guys are totally different. They would say things behind my back like "she is doing all this for attention", and other worse things I can't even say here.. fast forward now I am an introvert.. afraid of talking..
Honestly, since childhood I grew up in a hostel.. I seeked love that I missed from family since I was away from them..
But I am content now with who I am.. because men are still the same way.. they won't change.. I still aspire to be in a leadership position. I will just lead the way I am now
In the riddle it's not only about mind models. It's also about language expressions. In other languages you would know that the doctor is a woman, because there is a word for that.
Hello dear, please i want us to be good friends if you dont mind
I was watching this for a debate but I learned much more than expected 😄
So you lost the debate...
This is such a great talk!
I've asked this riddle to active hospital patients as a way to pass their time. Only 1 person ever got it.
I hadn´t to "get the riddle right", since I remembered the answer from my childhood - If memory serves me correctly, I firstly read it in a book called "Metamagicum" written by Douglas Hofstadter.
Great 17 minutes!
Excellent speech.
Thanks a lot.
🙏🙏
*To me most guys can theoretical do dating, though they mess up practically. And it has more to do with society in general than the actual situation. Everyone seems to be under societies influence of madness and that to make everybody so stressed out. So womens behaviour is not at all the reasons why dating is hard. Still women seem to have the only power to transform society on a large enough scale and thus to take dating and the whole ways we live our lives to another level. Therefore I like to assure you women: you have all the time and space to make decide over your own life, to open up and do what you like! The universe supports you and society needs you! Especially in public leadership and as initiators lies your strength! It may not be easy to overcome the trauma of centuries of exploitation and marginalisation. Though the rewards are thousandfold for all of us! You can do it! You have the power in your decision. Connect. Do small steps. Every contribution to this task is such a big gift of your unconditional love! I thank you deeply from my heart for existing and all good you ever did. For your patience and companionship! For your individuality and for your deliberate intentions and your wisdom! YOU ARE STRONG!*
The Leader of you is the ruleset to bring the plan... ..
Don't forget to blend..🇺🇸
Such an inspirational and motivating talk.
Thank you ❤
I would like to learn more, where can I find such studies/papers/etc.?
I am here because Women are destroying my view on the Women whom have been GREAT inspiration for a simple man like me. The Women who became my FOSTER mother's, the Women who are my LITERAL WONDER WOMAN. The women who stood up for me when I wasn't able.
Those women I cry for , those women I would die for, those women I fight for.
Great inspiration
Thank you, Alexis! It is such inspiring speech!
Hello dear, please i want us to be good friends if you dont mind
Simply inspiring!
Thanks so much
The most dangerous thing for any team to have is a fearful or insecure leader. You probably shouldn't be a leader if you are feeling that way...period.
Male leaders - Vision, Aim, Plan, Apply
Female leaders - Vision, Aim, Plan... waiting to be approved by the society, waiting to be accepted, waiting to be discovered, waiting, waiting, waiting...
Support women
You are so inspiring
what did her inability to accept a leadership accolade as a child on an all female team have to do with men?
Absolutely nothing, but her perception
She did explain this. Women fear because of stereotypes in the patriachal society highly enabled by men. Stop being close so minded.
i believe her coach was a man.
Loved it!
Hello dear, please i want us to be good friends if you dont mind
I am jumping up and down
Not surprised that majority of the negative comments on here are from men...many of you completely missed the point.
What if they were from women? Would you be surprised still or no? You obviously have this perceived notion that it would be men with no surprise. It could've been women that made most of the negative comments.
how can we miss a point when there wasn't one?
U right u right
I need a challenge of training 10 young persons with another person male. Let's see the impacts our trainees have at the end of the training.
The answer to your surgeon riddle is that the surgeon was the sons dad. Let that sink in- we have stereotypes about homesexual parents too.
Madison Vaughn watched for class on 4/28/2020 at 1:04am CST
Hello dear, please i want us to be good friends if you dont mind
Strange, I got it right immediately. Why?
I dont think a woman she be in charge nor do I think a man I say the right Person should be incharge
The only issue I have with women in leadership, particularly politics, is that most (if not all) have been APPOINTED to their position instead of voted in. Look at VP Kamala Harris, NY Gov, Supreme Court Justice, etc. There will be more respect for their achievement if they are voted in or not given all out preferential treatment.
Kamala was a district attorney and a senator. I think you need to be voted for those too.
@@ashleytanner06 Perhaps but not for VP.
E. Morrell for class 4.28.20 11:10
I got the riddle wrong!
You got leadership wrong. A leader hears arguments to inform an opinion, correlates it with facts, and sets a direction. Then direct the employees.
Thomas Miller watched 4/30/2020 at 8:27am
2:35 dude was on some serious thought process 😜😜
This is exactly what someone who isn't a leader would say. Your my leader when I say your my leader, and its not because I'm feeling generous. It's because it's obvious.
Is the university study available for me to read?
Please Mr. Shark, don't eat me! I have a family; eat them instead!
❤
Did it occur to anyone that the riddle itself is gender-discriminative? The feeling of not able to operate on one's own son can happen to men too! Why is this feeling supposed to be associated only to women?
its unethical/bad practice to operate on family. Too close to make objective decisions. Nothing to do with her being female or feelings
Right, if you would have told the riddle with mother was dead in the car, you would probably have thought of the surgeon as the mother, because in the current context that was the last thing introduced that made sense.
Or that the surgeon was indeed his dad . Why discriminate against homosexuals parenting.
Women aren’t in leadership… it’s not that hard a riddle… women are 50% of frontline combat…. It’s not that hard a riddle… women aren’t 50% of brick layers…. It’s not that hard a riddle.
Wow, an interesting observation, I have never seen a male principal in my pre school, school, Jr college, college or pg ....but it's extremely rare to see women chairman or secretary or treasurer of organizations.....it's like women can be ceo but not the founder.....or something and it makes sense!
But still a better representation than the US
@@Alaskanman not all men are like that......
@@Alaskanman 🤣ok bro
@@Alaskanman chastity belt meaning?
How do you / How would you reconcile a " Rifle " culture 🤔 with the leadership of your gender , ., female . Is the Rifle a Corporate mission ? Is it an Industrial product ? anyway Has feminism ever thought about it ? What is the priority of the Nations on Peace and Good will amongst the Signatories ? Southern Cross ✝️ 👌
I don't understand. That's not a riddle.
I watch a lot of outlander though, so...lol. And my mom was an ER nurse.
So... it is believed that every position needs to be occupied by an equal number of women and men? Why?
Brick layers are 99.9% men. Why should half of them be women?
I disagree with the presumption that equal numbers of men and women in leadership roles should be even the goal.
If men and women are equal in every way, then why does it matter who tends to be in what leadership roles? Let the cards fall where they may.
bruh... do you know how population works?
If it were Asian audiences it would be very silent at the end
We are all equally but we are very different men and women accept that fact and cooperate
👏👏👏👏👏
Why is she shouting?
This is all very nice until you are a woman in leadership and realize that the space, if not ready and open to diversity and women leadership, THE SYSTEM will make it quite impossible for you to thrive. Not everything can be center on the individual.
Prabhupada: Well, according to Vedic conception woman is never offered leadership. But experience has shown that woman’s leadership has not been successful.
Leadership depend on one's experience not gender..
really that starting riddle is old as the queen
Yet so many still get it wrong :-(
very good talk, but too much politics.
A topic being controversial doesn’t make it automatically political
1:00 Well, even a male doctor refused to operate on his wife!
我真的哭了，就在那些女生都还没进入社会没真正体验过男权社会的时候，就已经自我怀疑了。我们到底什么时候才能给予女性自己更多的鼓励和正向的教育，而不是作为父母就开始让女孩去做那些更安全稳定的被人领导的工作呢？因为那样不等于他们就会体验幸福。委屈的顺从什么时候能换来幸福。请问？从我们开始吧，改变这样的沟通方式和内容吧。
*Quero*
ok now women have a lot to do with..let them get it done …
>Women
>Leadership
Pick one.
>Ur mom
It's perverse
Bro
I’m super sexist. Thought the boy had a daddy and a father
😂😂😂😂😂😅😅😅😊 cap!!!
I would like to do Zoom call with you
Why do people at Ted speaks so fast? They don't allow information to sink in at any time. That's not a good speech.
I listened to this Ted Talk on 2X speed and still understood that she was full of hot air and delusions.
Does the bible agree with women in leadership positions over men?
God, it's so boring listening to her. It is all full of story telling and so few actual information coming across.
The interesting part starts at 8:28.
before that the first 8 and something minutes are summarized as follows:
"Women fare better in simulations of leadership in a controlled environment, but if asked about their leadership skills men are more sure of themselves."
Though I have to admit, from that point on it was quite entertaining.
Probably because this is geared toward women and a lot of women follow and understand the meaning stories very well
@@dharmahopkins4388 Sure, but I thought she wanted to show how women would lead and not how women would lead only other women.
That's not to say that she's only speaking to women. But she's just speaking in a way that is natural to her. Speaking conversationally or using stories let's people mentally place themselves there and lets them think about about it could effect them.
Sh'es speaking to Women.
Women are not meant to lead. Well I don't think a teenager can lead even though he might seemed to be responsible. Her trying to convince me is the same is her telling me she can live for 1000 years.