WHY ARE SO MANY BLACK WOMEN SINGLE? Is Social Media, Materialism OR Black Men To Blame?
HTML-код
- Опубликовано: 14 окт 2024
- #dating #blackwoman
In our live last week we discussed some of the reasons black women struggle in dating, relationships, and marriage compared to their non black counterparts. In this clip we discuss the statistics and viewers weigh in and give their reasons why they think some black women are single.
Full video
1. The Real Reason Why So Many Black Women Are Single?
ruclips.net/user/li...
Ejima (twin) was created by Ngozi and Nnena.
We are Nigerian-American identical twins documenting bits and pieces of our everyday lives.
Follow us on Instagram at
@ngozicnwafor / ngozicnwafor
@nnena.nwafor / nnena.nwafor
Tiktok _ejima
Don't forgot to like this video and subscribe to our channel!
A lot of black men are marriage minded but most of yall call them corny
You raise a good point. In the full live we had a conversation about what being marriage minded actually entails. Thanks for watching!
Yep
@@EJIMANnenaNgozi He almost 70 years old formerly married to a poor White woman while he put down all educated BW they didn't want him because he was marginal and whined alot. While married he chased single parent WW and put BW down during work hours online like a fool only to end up with nothing!
@@EJIMANnenaNgozi _How can BM be marriage-minded when most don't have examples around them? You got married because no BW wanted you so yu married a Poor WW and chased poor single-parent WW to try to upgrade while you put all BW down. The reason why they didn't want you because you act like a little BOY rather than a MAN!. _*_Nobody wants a effeminate man who whines all the time when you didn't do anything productive with your life Maceo!_*
And men call them corny too along with being simps...stop the cap
It’s not a black issue. Men in general no longer want to get married. Husbands get the worse version of their wives, because women no longer preserve themselves. The only things men get out of marriage are expectations and risk.
lol preserve themselves meaning?!
@@EJIMANnenaNgozi No man's wife should be another man's sneaky-link, casual-f*ck, hookup, come-thru chick, one nightstand, or babymama? There's no standard for what a wife is anymore. Nothing disqualifies a woman from being a wife in today's society. And that's why marriage is dead. A wife is an un-had woman.
@@EJIMANnenaNgozi You also mentioned men not wanting to get married in college. A wife is a wife at all times, no matter her environment. She's always intentional, and that filters out unserious men. So she won't end up someone's babymama or sneakylink. You are who you prioritize being, if you weren't a wife in your youth, you're not one now. If you prioritized fun, congratulations you're a fun-girl for life.
So is a husband a husband at all times? Just curious
@@EJIMANnenaNgozi No. A man must become and prepare, a wife must preserve and prepare. All people aren’t meant to marry.
A man who gets married is being selfless. Men get married for the good of society and for their family.
Men who don't care about society stay single because being partnered doesn't benefit us.
We are single but not celibate.
It's more fun to be single for a man
Being married is work.
Well said, that’s why a lot of BM marry interracially because it benefits them, BW it’s 90% financial and a lot of heavy lifting dealing with attitude all day 😪
@@blackphoenix123 actually men who marry outside of their race for their family lineage.
If you marry somebody Asian or from another brown country. Your children will be bilingual and also have dual citizenship in another country. If you teach your children to continue to marry someone of a different country than your lineage will continue to have multiple citizenships. And learn multiple languages over the generations.
If you want your children to have better access in this country. Then marrying a Becky, will give you more access to better jobs, more investment options. Marrying a snow bunny is a status symbol that just gives you more access in this country and it also increases your ability to earn money. Which will pass down to your children. Also the genetic benefits that you get from miscegenation is two fold.
Your offspring get the ability to incorporate the best genetics from both black and white parents. The creation of the ultimate mulatto. Which is often deemed as the most beautiful human being in American society.
From female dimes to pretty boys
This will allow your children to have more options in mating.
Irregardless of what ever flaw one may have the the ones who possess these features have privileges you didn't have growing up.
An teach them to do the same as you did so your offspring can one day infiltrate the majority holders of power.
Let's take prince who was only 5 ft 3 are Shemar Moore who is now bald.
Just being a pretty boy regardless of your flaws will give you a large pool of women who will gladly throw themselves at you. Also younger women are more apt to chase after pretty boys. So even if you're in your 50s you will have women 18 and 19 pining over you.
But the genetic benefits are to your children and your descendants and your lineage. Not only do they get dual families of two different backgrounds that they can pull resources from. If they continue on with the course of miscegenation. Your future lineage will become part of the majority in this country. Was there hidden genetics invisible to others.
Here we go. The other women are perfect 🤣
Makes sense!
@@blackphoenix123 most the average and below average looking sistas marry for finances. The ones who fine fine ultimately marry when their younger to a man who has three things
maturity
life experiences
intelligence
You possessed these three things, the above average looking women will look to marry you.
i have dated 3 women with a networth of over 7 figures. still dating one now, she wants to marry me.
im what you call a pookie.
Are you guys focused on all black people, African Americans AA or or Africans? Because we date/marry differently. I'm Ghanaian and my dad always told me that my husband is not in the same classroom with me. African men tend to go younger in a wife so when African men. start college, their wives are finishing high school. That's how my classmates always dated younger women. I don't know much about African American men, but the ones I dated in my late 20's, who had just finished college (Masters), were looking but they were not in a hurry. They all got married around 33 to 35 and up when they were financially settled in a good job - which is already too late for a woman.
Same here. I am from Cameroon and it is everywhere like that in Africa.
Great point! Americans date closer to their age vs African culture where large age gaps are more common. We speak about Black people in general but understand we are not a monolith and different cultures within the black community have different experiences. I have experienced black American men move slower and take their time compared to African men.
american men are called dogs and pedos when they date younger women...
Culture matters...youre raised African and understand dynamics correctly. Our value and timing for relationship and build of a family are unique (man and woman). Woman don't have the luxury of playing with time alike a man and have to approach relationships differently.
Gbam!! that is the first structural programming error. Where you are forced to try and match with an incompatible 'peer-to-peer' agemate. So rather than being ridiculed wise men opt out and go where they will not be 'shamed' for doing whats natural. The ones that brave it, end up divorcing anyway.
Scoail media, men, and materialism all played a role in the decline of marriage.
Due to the internet giving people readily available access to blogs and other sources of banal banter; instagram, Twitter, and other sources of celebrity embelishment. People guage their lives based on other peoples online presences. "Oh, she went on 5 vacations, and he husband paid for all of that." Yaas girl, get you a man like that. " she always slays in designer, girl, get that bag!"
The guys see all this, and then they start things like red pill and passport bros. Men that would possibly take a chance on just about any woman start seeing all this bs and its information overload and analysis.
Most of the dating pool is now shallow minded individuals that have gone delulu.
That stat about married BM is consistently misunderstood.
The stat is roughly:
85% of married BM are married to BW.
NOT: 85% of BM are married to BW.
Huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuge difference.
She lightly touched on it though.
33% of bm get married....of that 33%, 85% of bm get married to bw....In addition, bm are also the most divorced male group no matter the race of woman he marries.
33% of black men get married. of that 33%, 85% of black men Mary black women the remaining 15% married non-black women however, black men are also the most divorced group no matter what race of woman they marry
One word: ATTITUDE
One word: broke
It's more than attitude
@@T.H-v4htwo words
Submissive
Obedient
@@T.H-v4hblack women don’t make more than black men so by my math you’re broke
@@T.H-v4hnope blk men are making more than bw so if BM are broke so are bw time to work together idiot
As black men progress in our careers, and our salaries increase, our dating standards increase too and most black women don't qualify.
Interesting. Good luck.
So in other words as long as you’re not progressing in your career & you’re salary is low it’s fine to date bw? If that’s the case trust your doing bw a HUGE favor. Keep getting your non bw 💯
Facts I make 6 figures myself bw have proven multiple times they are not worthy now it’s not all bw just the ones from the west…. Also at my company the brothers I work with all share the same sentiment you get to a point where you’re not going to tolerate their garbage… sadly other races of women know how to take advantage of the men they see are winning
@@jacamatrno it’s not that y’all don’t know how to act the more money a man makes the less tolerant he is to unfavorable behaviors
False and you know it. We learned years ago that BW are the fastest growing demographic of entrepreneurs. We also learned that BW are the most educated subgroup in the USA.
Simultaneously we learned BM cost the economy of the United States of America $50 BILLION a year because of their underemployment and unemployment.
34% of blk man are married by 40
28% of blk women are married by 40
And yet bw have all these kids
Yup. By the 66% of unmarried men. Some married ones too
@@EJIMANnenaNgozi 46% of Black men aged 15-49 had a child, compared to 61% of Black women.
Most black women in American have always worked
You read the stats black men are married more meaning more marriage minded.. asking why to questions that have been answered by KS 3 years ago is not gonna change anything… black women overall do not present well to the black men they want. The question that you should ask is how are nonblack women finding black men to marry that you can’t find?? Are they hiding in plain sight?
Most black men marry black women then they do get married. Ultimately I do believe that non black women don't tolerate the baby mama rubbish that black women do. They set a higher standard and black men are forced to step up. At the end of the day you teach people how to treat you. Thanks for watching!
It's the ideology of the AMERICAN black woman! The Entitlement, the margin of safety they operate from is dangerous!
The Black man's toxic mentality and his self-destructive behaviors are more dangerous than anything in the Black community. Black men are 1000% responsible for destroying their own image and culture with rapp music, hip hop and the thug attitude, drugs, crime, and Black on Black homicides. The damage is irreparable.
Can you explain further?
Both sides are entitled sir. BK men are commanding submission, 50/50 and women take on the bulk of the home obligations.. HOW IS ANY OF THIS FAIR?
WOMEN have. Right to not want to settle for men that are not viable mates and many Bk men are not viable for marriage.
Working together in our community is always called "settling." every other culture works together. On top of that there are less men than women which goes even further in the black community so statistically speaking, every woman is not entitled to a man. I wish we would just work together especially in these times. One hand washes the other. Yes you may have home obligations just as your partner may have obligations to provide for the home, ensure you're protected, handle the things most women don't think about (car maintenance, fixing things around the house, etc. We have roles that naturally complement one another. Unless ladies now plan to go see what's downstairs when something goes bump in the night. I think we should learn to get along@@melizzamelizza
The issue is that in the black community “working together” usually looks like a woman taking care of a grown man. Its unacceptable. Building is great but theirs a fine line between that and being opportunistic.
54% bm childless n unmarried, 35% married with kids, so that leaves 10-12% with out of wedlock kids..while 61% bw have kids n some with biracial kids out of wedlock, so that leaves 39% without kids..so even if bm wanted to get married, there isn't enough childless women for 54% childless n unmarried bm..🙄🙄🫡🫡
I think it is an issue that black women have children without requiring marriage. Even I had a child out of wedlock but my child's father married me a couple months after our child's birth. More men need to also marry the woman that they impregnate.
Yesss this is it! Stats are nice but we cant blame women alone for being unmarried. Men getting them pregnant but not marrying them(if they desire it) are part of the issue!
@EJIMANnenaNgozi Lol Stats aren't just "nice". Stats paint a clear picture using logic & objectivity. If 54% of Blk Men are CHILDLESS 35% married and 61% of Blk women are having all of the children (even with non-Blk men)
This means Blk women are choosing a very small population of Blk men to have sex & children with. The small 10-12% of Blk men (Pookies, Ray-Rays, Drug dealers, scammer) are the deadbeats you must hold "THOSE" men accountable. Stop spreading this negative propaganda against Blk men, Most of us Blk men (54%) who did the responsible thing and waited until we started careers and businesses. Your frustrations should be directed to ask why these women constantly seem to pick bottom class losers
@@EJIMANnenaNgoziSo you want the combined 89% of Blk men to take blame for what a small pool of deadbeat 10-12% of Blk men did? That's is completely illogical & unfair.
@EJIMANnenaNgozi 80% of blk women w/kids are baby mamas who let 20% of blk men knock them up w/no ring. Single blk women are the problem. Stats dont lie.
Then I can’t find a women without kids… that a big turn off
Idk where your looking most women I know don’t have kids!
Depends on your age.
That’s similar to childless bw can’t find a bm without kids, most bm 35+ have kids
@@EJIMANnenaNgoziThat’s called an anecdotal opinion so called “most educated”.. MOST black women statistically have more children than black men.
@@jacamatrThat’s wrong.. most black men BY 35+ have kids.. different meanings. Less than 40% of black men have children and 25% of those are married with children. Thats why there’s a 80-20 rule of thumb because the remaining 15-20% are who black women sleep with without commitment
Stability matters because everyone in my orbit is married or close to getting married and they’re all gainfully employed
And black!
As a black man I just want peace...
We want peace as well. The issue is when some men say they want "peace" it can mean a woman with no voice, opinions etc. Someone who wont hold them accountable. I have an issue with that.
@@EJIMANnenaNgozi once you understand what peace means to us, you will have your answer
It's not about being single. It's about rearing children outside of marriage. This is a problem. Rather you are legally married, or spiritual marriage(meaning that woman receives her dowers)
Are you assuming single mothers dont desire marriage?
Nailed it. Out of wedlock birth rate is the issue.
@@EJIMANnenaNgoziThey don't. A lot of black sisters have this strange idea that kids are easy and marriage is hard. We are the only culture on Earth that thinks that. The truth is, it is kind of the other way around. Not saying marriage is easy, but it's a LOT easier than raising kids.
I get your point. Having a child is the biggest decision I a woman can make. The fear some of our sisters have is a result of trauma. Some women look at being married as bondage, suffering, slavery etc. We need more positive examples of black marriage besides celebrities.
If we all agree that the family structure was better then… the question is what’s changed that regulation?
1-Feminism?
2- cheating men?
3-cheating women ?
4-corporate America ?
5-broke men/ pookies/ ray rays?
6-independent don’t need no men?
7-cultural shift ?
& why?
Great question. Most likely a combination of all the things you listed. Part two video coming soon!
We keep having these think tanks about what we are doing/thinking vs what white, Indian, people are doing and the reasons why we can't. I encourage everyone to actually ask a White or Asian person "When did you get married", "Is that age common in your culture, did you feel financially stable, what actions do you feel you took to pursue marriage, did your family and community encourage it". Take notes!!!!! Keep what you think will be helpful and throw out the rest.
People keep saying Asians South Asians and Middle Easterners are getting married out of college and I’m like are any of you people actually friends with or even talk to some of these people. A lot of the getting married after college crowd are people who just came here for school. The majority of American born folks for all demographics are having a hard time coupling up. You guys watch too much tv and don’t spend time with people who don’t look like you
Well if most of you ungrateful loser immigrants moved back to your original homelands America would be a lot better. We will close the borders when Trump is elected, then you peasant fleeing foriegners won't talk so tough then.
We have enough data in the last 70 years tracking the decline of the blk marriage rate which is historically the worst in America.
Kinda related: You notice how we can speak on blackness with very little references to whiteness and no negativity towards whiteness.
In contrast(no pun intended) it seems when they speak on whiteness, blackness is usually the focus and its always negative, it almost seems like the purpose is to oppose blackness.🤔
Wth how is us when women be have 3 bd
Because men choose who becomes a mother. Bm need to learn how to discriminate with their sperm 🤷🏽♂️
Who gave them the babies?!
@EJIMANnenaNgozi the 15% of men.
Interesting
@@EJIMANnenaNgozi if you are unaware, it's 70% of black women having children out of wedlock with 15% of black men. The majority should always take the blame over the minority, especially when the data proves it.
Which black group are you all referring to? Because the stats would all be different.
In regards to Dr. Claude Anderson, he work is a must read and study wherein he speaks about all black people but primarily foundational black americans.
I have a request. At 26:55 you nicely addressed a statement about black women being independent. You explained why. But we have been explaining why for decades with the same results. So can you have a discussion about what we as black women could do differently, or will we just keep waiting for men to adapt to us? Cause they are not. This valid excuse pacifies us for a moment, but we keep coming back to this question "Why are black women single?"
Blk women are single bec most blk women refuse to give blk men what they want.... Most men in general want cooperation, feminine energy, peace, submission, and beauty. In return a masculine man will die to defend you and his kids.
This is a fair point. However some of these reasons arent a direct result of what black women are or arent doing. But we have a part two video coming soon. Thanks for watching!
Too far gone now …arrange marriages…BGS and SWP broke it down years ago.
Interesting
I'm 47 I don't want a wife
If I was looking for a wife she would be under the age of 24. No one over 30 for anything but a situationship.
Boy bye 😂😂
@@Ngozin1😅😅😅
@@Ngozin1 my ex wife was 18 when she approached me and I was 30. Black American men want younger wives with no kids and under 145lbs...
We like older thick women for situationships not marriage.
Question how many average non millionaire women who got but big like Nicki Minaj that are married. Kim Kardashian and cardi b all these women were under 145lbs but they butt was fake.
The women with the real big booty are heavy in the weight department and they rarely married unless they famous.
The married women in my family are slim
the numbers you use are so weird. Where are you pulling them from lol
Are you not Nigerian? By now, in nigeria, you would be a grandmother. The Western world gave you too much freedom. Na craze de worry una
Grandmother? Your not well. Biko go sleep 🤣
@EJIMANnenaNgozi but na truth na . Feminism only exists in the west ooo .naija no send that nonsense oo
😴
Good content ladies- i think late 20s, early 30s is a fine time to marry - my wife was 33 and i was 30 - she was a virgin, and an IT consultant and i ran a fixed income and derivatives trading desk. It was the perfect time for us- people got married younger back in the days because they pumped out 5+ kids, but who is really doing that now? Marrieds are doing 2 to 3 tops.
You/wife are the Exception. A women should never wait to late 20s-30s to marry.
@@Ahmed-uu9ro look up " statista" then "Estimated median age of Americans at their first wedding in the United States from 2021, by race and origin" enter all of in in your search and you will see you are wrong
Why not? I think that is perfect.
Makes sense! You did not mind her being older? I think 25 and older is good.
@@EJIMANnenaNgozi funny thing is, when you are in the "courting groove " you don't even notice age. You just see a pleasing to the eyes person, who likes you and is pleasant to be around. She didn't even understand what I did for a living- ours is a relationship founded on laughter
What’s the purpose of dating? Companionship, while passing time? Enjoying each other’s company? Only one issue with that: a man brings skills that have compounded over time to the dating market. With time his skills sharpen, and that will make him more desirable. A woman is mostly valuable for her youth and beauty, and sense of peace and being of a stable mind while in a relationship. The more the time passes, the more she looses majority of these values. My main point is that dating is extremely selfish and unfavorable to the woman. She is spending time with the man she loves anyways, why not establish a more concrete partnership from the very beginning. I think we should adopt the Muslim way of dating, I think it might be the superior way of dating.
What is the Muslim way of dating?
They dont date, they court. It is short and straight to the point, the point being threading the fabrics of the community through building healthy families and the ummah. Both families, that of the girl and the guy, are involved, so the process is much more honest and true, compared to "dating". If the guy likes the girl, and vice versa, the guy is vetted by the men of the girl's family, then proper ceremonies are had, and the couple come together. Their rates of broken families are almost none existent. Their women have reported to be much happier and healthier than women of the west, and honestly you dont have to wait for them to report that, I've taken school courses with muslim women, and just from small conversations and interactions you can tell they are of much healthier psychological health than the western girl.
Theyre single due to no fault other than their own. They want to be Boss babes, Divestors, Decentering men, Independent etc. Its By choice.
And that is not true I’m only date to find a wife.. just the women are just way to fast to be a wife
To be real .. u going to feel like I’m disrespecting y’all if I just talk about the thing women will do on the 1st night
If the women are fast the men being fast is also an issue. Men think the double standard favors them but at the end it impacts both genders negatively.
Also on the college subject how do WW and Asian women who college focuses are statistically more advanced then those of black women focuses how are they able to do both with harder work??
Unless you attend an hbcu they also have more options
@@EJIMANnenaNgozi All races of women attend college more than the men so a similar ratio of men are available to them so that doesn’t matter
cause most of you gals are more of a pain to deal than staying single. 💯
become an asset to a man's life; not a liability
Thanks for watching 😃
46% of Black men aged 15-49 had a child, compared to 61% of Black women.
85% of black men only marry black women.
But men are more picky when it comes to marriage oppose to just having sxxx.
They say a man will sleep with anything, but he won't marry just any woman.
Also other factors play a part.
Income and career paths
Education level
Body build or fitness
Attraction level or looks
Options in women
These factors all play a part as to what type of woman a black will marry. The more he has going on the more picky he will be as it pertains to a wife.
The Men who want marriage have a preference of what they want in a wife a lot of Sistas start seeking a husband when they are no longer what men want in a wife
Wow interesting analysis. Goes to the point we made in yesterdays live. Ultimately men are the gatekeepers or marriage/relationships.
@@EJIMANnenaNgozi yes right and women are gate keepers to sxxxx.
We as men do what we need to do to get lots of free sxx from different women.
Good smelling cologne
Nice shoes
Semi formal clothing
Fresh haircut
Well groomed beard
Reading so we can speak intellectually
Weight lifting for muscles
Honing our social skills and being articulate
We don't do all these things for marriage. We do it just to have multiple and consistent sxxx partners.
We learn real quick what women want in a man to go to bed with. So we become that. Otherwise we would be incels who don't be getting none. We do what women want to give that kitty up
Women who get married do what men want in a woman.
What do men want in a wife?
What do men look for in a wife?
How can you serve him and make him happy?
When I wanted to sleep with lots of women. I asked similar questions.
1. The guys who get all the girls to sleep with them what do all have in common.
2. What type of guy do women chase for sxxx,
3. How can I please a woman in the bedroom and make her happy with the D.
When I sat down and used introspection I discovered the answer was clear as day based on my own personal experiences any one offs or accidental success to effort on my part.
The major thing I did was ask a myriad of women similar questions about the type of guys they threw the box at right away and why. They all have similar commonalities. And I applied them to my GAME.
No offense ladies but this is why Timothy 2:12 was written so sayeth the lord
delaying? they have a long history of not getting married at all.......
The elephant in the room
Know Some thinking I’m hating but not
But imma keep it 💯
Need to see how 🇺🇸gay agenda has up ended relationships 👍
Ex I know plenty of sistas who tell me or have told me and ❤ telling me - I have gay BM friends 😮
Funny because and I have to scratch my head cause -they single asf
40 year old Black man here. Having been married once, I think maybe we should start exploring polyamory, and yes, that means the men allow the women too as well. I find that both men and women are finding it difficult to find the person who they actually desire on a visceral level and the person who is good. I married a woman who I was not that attracted to but she was a "good" woman. She was college educated, had a good career, and no children and wore her natural hair. Till this day she is a good woman but we were not compatible, particularly sexually and in the physical chemistry category. We did not produce any children from that marriage. However, I think both men and women are finding it hard to find all in one person. I have had some women who have fucked me very well. But they had serious trauma and major red flags that would not make them suitable for marriage.
This is why black women take so much heat for their standards but I actually agree with them now. If that person doesn't turn you on then it's just not going to work. Black women have stopped settling and now men are starting to stop settling as well. We want someone who is stable, emotionally, mature and sexy. Back in the old days it was all about finances now, not so much, women can take care of themselves and so can men. We're either going to have multiple people become composite to be the complete partners we want or we're just going to end up single because we don't want to settle for a sexless marriage with a good man or woman or have a baby by someone you're very attracted to but not willing to settle with.
most men settle for a women they are not that attracted to..especially white guys!..Have you seen their wives. That shit is not envious. They end up divorcing them too.
@@MojoeHart it was an arranged marriage
@@MojoeHart you can believe what you want. That picture is obviously not me lol
Sounds like you were the problem
@@brianfreckles8542 I'm sure I'm part of it!
These two are wrong on every single point they’re discussing smh.
😂😂😂
Seems like you enjoying it with all your comments
Look for 7:16 someone in that 35-41 ! 🤷🏾♂️
Talk and beg to much.
_A lot of older BM are just as broke as younger BM; many are not established. Older BM dupp younger BW who have nothing and they find out have 1-2 babies and they leave older BM who have nothign to offer!