Went through so many relapses too in the first couple of years trying to quit. All changed when I went to AA, got a sponsor and did the programme properly (going through the steps). 14 months sober now and I know I won't relapse. Try it if you want the nightmare to end...also if you want anything left of your life by the time you do get sober. I lost my flat and most of my friends and relationship. Don't wait til it gets to that point.
I was a chronic relapser for many years. Sober 15 years now, what it came down to for me, is that I am no longer willing to pay the consequences for my drinking anymore. I’m past believing that I can drink in safety somehow, because that will never happen. And if the day should come when I’m willing to pay those consequences again, I’ll probably drink. But today is not that day. And that’s what it’s all about. One day at a time.
You say there was "no trigger," but I can see that there was. It was a very clear, but subtle one: You don't seem to have a strong enough reason WHY not to drink. You need to find a very, very strong reason why. Proud of you for continuing to fight, and coming back on to make this video!
Hey. I did a year no beer in 2021. Wish I never drank again after that. It was amazing. I am now 5 weeks without a drink and glad you posted this and I found it as I’d feel the exact way as you and be kicking myself so thanks for this. It wasn’t for nothing. Piece of advice, I’d lose the “I’m an alcoholic label” it’s just words. You used to drink and now you don’t. That’s it. Best of luck 👍🏻
Man, I've been right there. It seems that our decisions are somehow aligned even across the pond, as I have somehow stumbled with you along this journey. Tomorrow is a new day. You inspire me to be better. Thank you for being you. As Mr. Rogers would say, "I like you just the way you are." We stumble and fall so that we learn to pick ourselves up. Keep up the good work, mate!
@@arvopohja7693 yeah! I’m on day 27 today, I’ve found the first week or two are the hardest but it gets easier and easier to hate alcohol. I look at it as pure hell these days
@@HaydenPettit-dx8dv great!. I hit my rock bottom six years ago and being sober ever since. For grawings i drank lot of spargling water.. i havent had urge for years now.
@@arvopohja7693 well done on six years, that’s some achievement! I always think of the actor Ben Affleck and what he said “we have to find our rock bottom and say we’re done” I relate so much. I’ve tried so much to quit before, but I think it has to get so bad that it’s either up or down
I’ve made these videos several times, wondering why I drank again. Eventually it sticks, I’d rather be making videos of being grateful to be sober. 3 years in, so far so good.
I'm completely with you. It's absolutely no help to either of us, but I really do understand you, my friend. It's very, very difficult. Day 1 for me tomorrow and off we go again. Take care, and don't beat yourself up too much.
My personal advice to someone who lives with an alcoholic who despises the idea of being labeled, do not break your own rules and boundaries, you say, this is an alcohol free living room/bedroom, the best way i could describe it is why would you drink in a school. Well you wouldnt because its a school, its your how you handle your environment your in that really sets off your determination of boundaries. I hope this helps. Ive had 6 days of no sleep helping a family member to ween off 18 cans of stel a a day for 3 weeks and we have acheived down to 0 for now in that short ammount of time, we did it because we had to strip back those boundaries that got broken by the alcoholic, what it looked like on the table in front of them, the comfort feeling got stripped away because of being convinced its comfortable and reassuring its there. Even the sound of the can popping, sounds ridiculous in a lot of peoples minds but its not to others. But when we stripped it back and introduced those rules and that discipline and boxed up that accessibility and stress. We did it. A gentle reminder to always most always set your boundaries first before you are willingly optimistic to say yes im done now its time for sobriety. Zero to hero doesnt happen overnight
Sometimes you need the dopamine hit of having something nice in a glass. Maybe a fancy glass with a seed-lip (non- alcoholic gin type thing) and tonic or a 0% sparkling wine? If it doesn’t trigger you to drink alcohol it actually can scratch that itch pretty well.
That sucks man, but please keep making these videos. I think a lot of people can relate to the “man on the street” (or man in a car?) style of delivery. Do you write down why you think you drank and try to recognise those feelings next time? I’m 666 days sober (oooh spooky!) and don’t journal or do any of that stuff but if you keep relapsing it could help?
Watched a few of your videos and comparing them to other youtubers I have seen try and quit. I think a trap I have seen a lot of people fall into is use YT as a form of get out of jail free kind of relapse documentation by seeking validation from people saying "hey it's ok, you'll make it soon." I think, as long as you're using this to document the journey and not as a form of validation (even subconsciously) then you'll be ok. Yes, it's worth nothing that set backs happen, but if there are constant relapses being validated by posting online this might almost be a crutch to fall back on to subconsciously seek approval that the transgression was in some ways ok and part of the journey. Ultimately, it's ok to drink/relapse, and starting to moderate it down each time is progress. But the all or nothing approach combined with validation by strangers online can be deleterious. The question is - are you using this forum to keep yourself accountable or is it allowing you a degree of accountability shirking?. Food for thought.
Great comment, I think sometimes the mantra of “relapse is a part of recovery” gives people permission to “slip up” when really it keeps people in a cycle. I’m not saying Adam is this person, but it’s a thought process many use to justify drinking.
Went through so many relapses too in the first couple of years trying to quit. All changed when I went to AA, got a sponsor and did the programme properly (going through the steps). 14 months sober now and I know I won't relapse. Try it if you want the nightmare to end...also if you want anything left of your life by the time you do get sober. I lost my flat and most of my friends and relationship. Don't wait til it gets to that point.
Mate, your on the right curve. The 95% of nights you aren't drinking is far more impressive, than the one night you drank.
Reducing the percentile little by little until it is no more. It can be done. We are proof of it. Bloody ego and old habits gets in the way sometimes.
I was a chronic relapser for many years. Sober 15 years now, what it came down to for me, is that I am no longer willing to pay the consequences for my drinking anymore. I’m past believing that I can drink in safety somehow, because that will never happen. And if the day should come when I’m willing to pay those consequences again, I’ll probably drink. But today is not that day. And that’s what it’s all about. One day at a time.
You say there was "no trigger," but I can see that there was. It was a very clear, but subtle one: You don't seem to have a strong enough reason WHY not to drink. You need to find a very, very strong reason why. Proud of you for continuing to fight, and coming back on to make this video!
Don’t give up! Forgive yourself and move on
Hit the old reset button and off we go again. Every day of no drinking is better than any day of drinking
Hey. I did a year no beer in 2021. Wish I never drank again after that. It was amazing. I am now 5 weeks without a drink and glad you posted this and I found it as I’d feel the exact way as you and be kicking myself so thanks for this. It wasn’t for nothing. Piece of advice, I’d lose the “I’m an alcoholic label” it’s just words. You used to drink and now you don’t. That’s it. Best of luck 👍🏻
Man, I've been right there. It seems that our decisions are somehow aligned even across the pond, as I have somehow stumbled with you along this journey. Tomorrow is a new day. You inspire me to be better. Thank you for being you. As Mr. Rogers would say, "I like you just the way you are." We stumble and fall so that we learn to pick ourselves up. Keep up the good work, mate!
I’m on day 11 and absolutely drowning in cravings. I’ve been to the gym this morning and can’t seem to get booze off my mind. It’s a tough fight.
Sure is mate
Did you manage to cope?
@@arvopohja7693 yeah! I’m on day 27 today, I’ve found the first week or two are the hardest but it gets easier and easier to hate alcohol. I look at it as pure hell these days
@@HaydenPettit-dx8dv great!. I hit my rock bottom six years ago and being sober ever since. For grawings i drank lot of spargling water.. i havent had urge for years now.
@@arvopohja7693 well done on six years, that’s some achievement! I always think of the actor Ben Affleck and what he said “we have to find our rock bottom and say we’re done” I relate so much. I’ve tried so much to quit before, but I think it has to get so bad that it’s either up or down
I’ve made these videos several times, wondering why I drank again. Eventually it sticks, I’d rather be making videos of being grateful to be sober. 3 years in, so far so good.
I'm completely with you. It's absolutely no help to either of us, but I really do understand you, my friend. It's very, very difficult. Day 1 for me tomorrow and off we go again. Take care, and don't beat yourself up too much.
try AA, or some therapy. One day doest erase your work over month. You doing good, stay strong
Keep up the vids its a great help.
Maybe because u felt good and at your best that can also be a dangerous time for a lapse
Tomorrow is a new day!
My personal advice to someone who lives with an alcoholic who despises the idea of being labeled, do not break your own rules and boundaries, you say, this is an alcohol free living room/bedroom, the best way i could describe it is why would you drink in a school. Well you wouldnt because its a school, its your how you handle your environment your in that really sets off your determination of boundaries. I hope this helps.
Ive had 6 days of no sleep helping a family member to ween off 18 cans of stel a a day for 3 weeks and we have acheived down to 0 for now in that short ammount of time, we did it because we had to strip back those boundaries that got broken by the alcoholic, what it looked like on the table in front of them, the comfort feeling got stripped away because of being convinced its comfortable and reassuring its there. Even the sound of the can popping, sounds ridiculous in a lot of peoples minds but its not to others. But when we stripped it back and introduced those rules and that discipline and boxed up that accessibility and stress. We did it. A gentle reminder to always most always set your boundaries first before you are willingly optimistic to say yes im done now its time for sobriety. Zero to hero doesnt happen overnight
Sometimes you need the dopamine hit of having something nice in a glass. Maybe a fancy glass with a seed-lip (non- alcoholic gin type thing) and tonic or a 0% sparkling wine? If it doesn’t trigger you to drink alcohol it actually can scratch that itch pretty well.
This. still need to trip the reward switch.
hi Alan, read alcohol explained by William Porter
Keep pushing through. Read Allen Carr if you want to help long term sobriety
Alan Carr has really helped my brother who is an alcoholic quit drinking (and helped me quit smoking 20+ years ago)
That sucks man, but please keep making these videos. I think a lot of people can relate to the “man on the street” (or man in a car?) style of delivery. Do you write down why you think you drank and try to recognise those feelings next time? I’m 666 days sober (oooh spooky!) and don’t journal or do any of that stuff but if you keep relapsing it could help?
Youre funny 😂❤
Happens, you gotta smash through and just go longer next time.
Look after yourself.
Watched a few of your videos and comparing them to other youtubers I have seen try and quit. I think a trap I have seen a lot of people fall into is use YT as a form of get out of jail free kind of relapse documentation by seeking validation from people saying "hey it's ok, you'll make it soon." I think, as long as you're using this to document the journey and not as a form of validation (even subconsciously) then you'll be ok. Yes, it's worth nothing that set backs happen, but if there are constant relapses being validated by posting online this might almost be a crutch to fall back on to subconsciously seek approval that the transgression was in some ways ok and part of the journey. Ultimately, it's ok to drink/relapse, and starting to moderate it down each time is progress. But the all or nothing approach combined with validation by strangers online can be deleterious. The question is - are you using this forum to keep yourself accountable or is it allowing you a degree of accountability shirking?. Food for thought.
Great comment, I think sometimes the mantra of “relapse is a part of recovery” gives people permission to “slip up” when really it keeps people in a cycle. I’m not saying Adam is this person, but it’s a thought process many use to justify drinking.
you aint reached your rock bottom yet. thats all.
That anticipation is similar to the art of lighting a cigarette and having one or two drags only. The rest of the ciggy is not enjoyable.
go to a meeting