5 Reasons Why Men Pull Away After Getting Close 😣😥
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- Опубликовано: 2 авг 2024
- This video covers why men pull away after getting close.
Learn how to reach his heart (even if he's distant or difficult right now): www.understandhim.com/
When it comes to the topic of why men pull away, ghosting and dating advice for women, it's important to understand that men pull away even in good relationships.
In fact, most relationship advice for women doesn't really make it clear that the reason why guys pull away might not be a problem at all, it might even be a good sign for the health of your relationship.
Now granted, I'm not talking about those occasions where someone ghosted who never really was that interested in the first place. That kind of thing happens with dating and general dating tips cover this kind of thing, so that's not what I'm addressing when I talk about when men pull away in a relationship.
What's important is why he pulls away and specifically why he pulls away when everything is great.
Much of the time, things are great and there's no problem. In these cases, the answer to why do men pull away has nothing to do with you or your relationship, so the biggest thing to understand is not to take it personally and create a problem where there is none.
So why do guys pull away? Why does a guy pull away when things are going well? Why men pull away in relationships when they say nothing is wrong?
That's what we'll cover here in this video and trust me, as a relationship expert I can tell you this is must-know information!
Hope you liked the video and I hope it helps you! If you liked it, it would be really cool if you could leave a Like & Comment (it really helps me out).
Also, if you have any questions, please feel free to ask them here in the comments! I read all of them and I try to reply to as many as I'm able to as well.
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Learn how to reach his heart (even if he's distant or difficult right now): www.understandhim.com/
Hope you liked the video! Any questions, comments, thoughts? Let me know here! 😘
I have experienced this many times. The point is, we just need to accept things as they are. Whatever it is in front of you just believe and accept it. No analysing no overthinking, this will save a lot of your energy girls. Running after only makes it worse and makes a guy pulls away. I can’t emphasise it enough!!! Believe what a guy tells you or shows u! If he tells u he’s not ready or ghosting u just accept it and go on with your life! Who is meant to stay will stay or come back to you anyhow. There’s no point thinking or giving two shits bout it. Let things be as it is and you’ll be surprised to see things turned around and works in your favour! Both ways you’re doing yourself a favour!! If he’s a right one he will come back and if not then you have been working on yourself for your goals anyhow. So it’s a win win situation. Be patient and let things unfold on its own. Universe has its own way to distance you from certain people, which will only benefit you in the long run! I know it’s hard I kno it’s difficult but trust me, everything will be for your own good. Time shows everything! U will thank me I promise. Just focus on your life and move on.
Thankyou for your words..its just happen to me ...and yes i have to focus on myself..
@@jelovibes2039 just happened to me too! Yesterday I texted him and told him that when he has the space to add me to his life then contact me. I’m sooooo sad but his actions stopped matching his words. I kinda think he was falling for me quickly so, he started being totally unavailable for the last 3 weeks so, I ended it. 😭
@Arifa i can't thank you enough for your ideas. You have no idea how much courage it has given me to move on!
@@sbtmirza329 yes girl! Stay strong and know your worth. Be a high value woman. You deserve it all don’t ever settle for less than what you deserve. Good luck to you! 💝
The main reason for males to pull away is we all need love, but they ate enough, a few days later, they'll start getting hungry again
This is a good analogy
Such a strange message to women. I think we’re omitting the importance of communication. Why can’t we just have a conversation form our hearts? I think it’s too complicated and unfair that I (women) have to suppress my thoughts and emotions because he (men) is “wired like this”. I think that, In a relationship were both ends respect each other, they would be loving and genuinely reassuring to the other person, because that’s what they want, and they communicate it. Anyone in a relationship should be able to say “I am here. I’m not going anywhere”, and it comes from the heart. They are choosing every single day to be there, in a partnership. They don’t need to see each other every day (unless they’re married or living together). They have to have trust, communication and emotional maturity. I recently (literally yesterday) broke it off with someone I really wanted in my life. It hurts and I know I will be fine. I don’t have time to sit down, chill and wait for him to feel comfortable to get close again. I’m going about my day and my routine (work, gym, family, friends, etc), but I’m going to be clear towards him about my standards, as I hope he does the same. If he can’t have this conversation, he doesn’t seem to be sure of what he wants, and he’s being all wishy-washy, I’m out.
Totally agree with you 1000 percent. All it takes is to talk rather than playing guessing games and waiting.
I totally agree! Why we ignore the importance of communication. Not all cases are the same. Each one has got its own treat.
Men are not women, plain and simple. More women get dumped then men because women try to get men to talk and think like them.
No workie😅
It's estrogen vs testosterone.
Thank you for giving your gluten exposure example. That really helped clarify that fear/panic feeling. Love the way your therapist had you process that out. Very helpful.
I admitted that I liked him and inmediatly he just pull away and yes I found that strange, I started thinking really hard what is happening .learning this from you let me feel so much more better thank you.
He's stressed for is own reason....which his own is also mine come to thick about it....once he start to gets easy into the relationship I'm left to a clue to my next step in the relationship......maybe he's thinking it's not real based on how fast and smooth it's going.....being too needy can be a reason for consciousness.....having doubt....he's thinking far into his future....wherefore you had to be mature enough to back off and relax so he can get his own space to consider you as a liability in the future
@@normalindsay8722 thank you for your reply and for such good advice again, blessings to you and your family
This was a great video… Especially the very end, where you said, talk yourself through calming down.
I’ve been stressing all day, and this video truly did help me. Thank you.
I’ve decided not to wait very long when a guy does this. Either show up to be present in my life or I’ll find someone else that will..🤷🏼♀️
You won't find anyone else, or at least someone you actually wanted.
You'll be on your own for the rest of life.
@@co1699yeah ok..
@@sarazink2237 4 months ago, Sara, and still alone.
I know you.
😉👍@@sarazink2237
it’s literally what i’m going through you just make it so easy to understand what’s going on, thank you
Same
What's the rush, destination unknown, don't attach or focus on being needy, desire to be chosen to feel good about yourself, doubts about the relationship if there's a deal-breaker🆘✅
Text him would explain how it works
+ 2 3 4 8 1 0 3 3 7 8 3 1 0 !!!!!!!!
currently growing through this. it’s been almost three weeks and it’s killing me😩😩
Women do this too. I feel your pain tho.
Text him would explain how it works
+ 2 3 4 8 1 0 3 3 7 8 3 1 0 !!!!!!!!
The solution is to date multiple people. It's called quantum dating. Keep a rotation, and that way you won't need to feel that way when one pulls away. You'll always have your pick and sort out the garbage in the process. Don't commit to one until they filly know ur boundaries and are the one who can respect them. You don't need to ever be played if you establish rules like this...unless you like to play games, then by all means! 😂
Sabrina, you are amazing. The man I'm seeing has taught me a lot about men...he actually will occasionally just tell me what men want and need and it almost always matches what you say. Keep up the great advice!
Thanks for sharing!!
Text him would explain how it works
+ 2 3 4 8 1 0 3 3 7 8 3 1 0 !!!!!!!!
That's great that he tells you and you believe him!
Women often hear what men have to say and then just don't believe it or think that must not be what he means 😅
This is random, and not really part of the video (although I LOVE all of your video topics and watch them all!) but I was totally experiencing those dizzy/fuzzy/about to faint or collapse feelings you were saying. I'm so glad I'm not the only one! It happened to me once when I was walking and it scared me so much. I thought I was dying! I was so afraid of it happening again and it became an anxiety for me and I would keep getting the dizzy spells when I thought about it! I was able to overcome it after some therapy as well. Just wanted to share. Our mind can really play tricks on us and we have to remember that we are in control and we WILL be ok no matter what!
Spot on Sabrina! Your advice is top notch 😊
Sabrina Alexis! Oh how I love you woman! You have given me so much needed advice and such a new perspective … not only about romantic relationships but also about myself! I simply want to say thank you for giving me “a new mode”!!! You are appreciated! ❤️
Thank you so much!!
Text him would explain how it works
+ 2 3 4 8 1 0 3 3 7 8 3 1 0 !!!!!!!!
Help we met 1 year ago on line we planned meeting he rescheduled 3 times I gave up but throughout the year he kept on texting randomly sending me holiday wishes telling me he was thinking of me we finally met and had best time ever after that we talked for about 10 days constantly for hours he said he liked me and knew things are gone work for sure .somthing personal happen he stopped talking when I reached out he said he was busy cause he had personal problems we spoke few more times I believe it was legit .I really like him what do I do now
Exactly the thing I was racking my brain with and then this video gets uploaded! Thank you!!!
Hope it helps!
Text him would explain how it works
+ 2 3 4 8 1 0 3 3 7 8 3 1 0 !!!!!!!!
Oh ....I'm not rush him to reply me. I leave him alone for 2 days then.I ask him how are you my love. And he tell me about his stressed and he said he sorry for not text me. Woooow!!! This video is really useful. Thanks 💖 something women are good at insecure .....even sometimes it's not that bad but we just think too much.
I understand the celiac thing! My son and I are dealing with this! So glad you are ok. But you are so right about talking yourself down!
Not sure what’s going on with my guy. He’s been distant for some reason. I’m giving him space!
Text him would explain how it works
+ 2 3 4 8 1 0 3 3 7 8 3 1 0 !!!!!!!!
Thanks for this video.Perfect timing 🙌
So glad!
I needed this to hear!! Exactly my problem! He must be so annoyed by me! THANK YOU!❤
Text him would explain how it works
+ 2 3 4 8 1 0 3 3 7 8 3 1 0 !!!!!!!!
This whole video is so spot on!!! Word for word. I should’ve known before he broke up with me
I asked him, if we are in a relationship or not... He said, he's afraid, that he cannot fulfill my needing a and he is too busy to meet me often enough. Now he's backing up, not reacting to invitations in a positive way etc. I don't know what to do now. Does he just want to have a friendship with benefits? I absolutely don't want that, because I really startet to catch feelings🙁
You should take it at face value. He doesn’t want the same things as you do. Most men are not super focused on relationships anyway
Went through this . It killed me. It’s been 4 months now n I realized he ain’t coming back. Especially after he heard I was dating someone else. He text me that he’s really happy for me. Which is nice of him to say but that sealed my fate with him
Did you chase him or cling?Was it a relationship or just dating no sex etc?
I wish I saw this 2 weeks ago before I ended things with someone LOL. I apologised and said I'm sorry and I wanted him back and he doesn't want to be back now LOL. But going to take the advice from this video and move forward! If he comes back, then great we can talk, but otherwise, things happen for a reason and I am sure I will meet someone even more incredible in the future!
Same…
This comments me enlighten me..thanks.
I bet you feel a lot different now than you did when you wrote this. Hope so.
I was so devastated that my guy pulled back when things were getting good and I essentially ended it too, but didn't want to.
Now I can see he has a Fearful Avoidant attachment style, and now I'm glad it happened because he wasn't able to meet my needs. I feel much better now.
Hey Brenda..you are beautiful and sure u will get someone better and deserve you..I've been in your part same here and I'm feeling great now..just ignore him back 😂
Thank you for this. You're awesome!
You're so welcome!
I love the polarity of the story. That is exactly the mindset I go through. On another note: thank God for gluten free foods now 😊
This is the type of advice I come to youtube for
Thank you for a wonderful information very helpful thank you
Loved your video ! Thank you Thank you Thank you 💚
+2349037866839.
Thank you Sabrina.. I’m undergoing this right now it’s nearly 1 month that he’s not texting me, so I didn’t communicate with him also and I’m planning too break up with him.
Can you do a video on how to love yourself ? I'm really struggling with that
Wow I recently got rejected several times by this guy who I obsessed over, this video is so amazing it’s a video I feel like I manifested by trying to not let my obsession overtake me. You are so beautiful and wise. Thank you so much, I love reading your emails too because I’m subscribed to your newsletter. 😘
hello it work i can't believe am with my love again after so many years_of_break-up,😭😭
+13056626016⏮⏯⏭▶💕💕💕
Change your picture and he will return
Love this ❤️
You're smart! Love this topic! ☺
Thank you!! 😊
Thanks for this..
I am experiencing it right now, it’s really hard, it almost like he has someone else, but he won’t admit, always come with excuses like work and study. I have made all the mistakes , have said break up, have said just being friends etc, I feel he doesn’t care anymore. It’s almost that I am waiting for him dumping me so I can have a closure.
You made laugh so much, you are so right!!
You nailed it girl
I am so happy that you said you had celiac, i do too and for some reason i always think no one will want to date me because i have dietary requirements and no guy would want to put up with that
Not true at all!! I gave guys plenty of reasons to not want to date me when I was younger, but having celiac wasn't one of them!
@@SabrinaBendory thank you ❤️ it’s hard to be a high value woman when you feel like you’d be a burder for the thigs that are for life and absolutely out of your control 🙄 and it’s easier to believe from someone who is in the similat situation and knows how it is
Ughhhhh. It looks like this was published the day I thought he ghosted me.
I wonder if I had seen this if it wouldn't have ended. Honestly I'm not exactly sure it ended but I've gone through the whole grieving process.
I'll watch all your videos for the next one, I guess 😒
+2349037866839.
I don’t worry about that anymore. Once I come to you & tell you that I don’t like this an you don’t change, block & delete lol #on to the next
And that’s why now, I have options now.
How much space do we give before deciding he probably isn’t coming back?
Navigating relationships could be daunting, irrational behaviour could be the result, motivation is needed to succeed in life🆘✅
It was great really most of these advice people don't mention the stress part
Help we met on line about a year ago we talked first day it was awesome he disappeared reached again a week later and asked me to continue talking I agreed we never met he kept on rescheduling a year later we met after randomly talking or texting we had and awesome time we continued to talk 2 more weeks somthing personal happen one day he completely pulled back and told me he had prpblems and I was bothering him too much is there hope?
The guy who I suppose I have a relationship works in a REALLY stressing work, and been in a boat for 3 months he is like a candle burning. We have 3 days without talking but the last 10 days he is not communication if I don't do it. He said he is tired but all this give me a headache. How many days has to pass before I really have to worried. But to be sincere I am a little tired. The problem is that he has to leave the boat at the end of nov and he don't receive the Letter yet. Well, I don't know. Like I said, I am tired.
Problem is he literally told me he doesn’t want to be kept that’s why he lost interest
What if he brake up with me how can I fix it
He was just here and was told me he wanted to get married, then a week later he dumps me? He said he lost interest and that he doesn’t think we work. This is the second time and I’m lost ? I felt like we were so much healthier this time. He recently joined the military and might be going on deployment really soon. We’ve been together for 3 years. I’m so down about it, can I do anything? I love him and I love myself. I just didn’t want to lose him because he taught me so much :/
update
Reason #6: You pulled away first. It's the time, when you played "hard to get" and he just moved on.
Yes... we're tired of this game.
It's now 1 month and few weeks and I have broke up with my boyfriend but I have tried to move on but I can't someone please help me cause l will go mad😢😢😢😢😢am thinking about him every now and then.
It took me basically a year to get over my last bf and just when I thought I'm finally over him, my flatmate started dating him. It was horrible. Luckily they didn't work out lol, but today I'm so over him I would be fine if it did work out between them.
Best advice I can give you is to give yourself time and try to distance yourself from him physically at least. Lean on your good friends and try to do something that makes you happy or at least smile at least once a week. I know you'll get through this girl. Just be patient 💖
I admitted that I liked him and inmediatly he just pull away and yes I found that strange, I started thinking really hard what is happening
Quality of life could be an issue,don't need to be embarrassed in public, reminds you of your own irrational behaviour🆘✅
Have you slept with him yet
Sounds you gave him something to digest and he had to go away and digest it.
I've been thinking of processing emotions like this and it makes a lot of sense - guys process things on their own so if he has a lot to deal with then he needs some space to properly digest all this food he has eaten before he receives more
Thank you 🙏🏽 😊
The only thing I want to know is how many boyfriends/girlfriends can one have in a lifetime ? I am always amazed how people are oblivious of those who have been looking to hook up for 18 years ... The person failed to get into a serious relationship with all those love interests 100 times but it's going to work with you ? Let's not be naïve
play on half speed
okay so, I know this guy for 3-4 weeks, everything is going too well, we have perfect chemistry going on, we are so close and maybe too close until everyone starts to think that we have a relationship and then he suddenly pulls away from me. I don't know what's going on because everything seems good and I just feel safe with him, I feel comfortable. Even I didn't want to pressure him to move to the official relationship, I am okay with our thing now no need to labeling our status, but still it hurts to know that he acting like this. I want to know what he is thinking but I am afraid of rejection so I choose to stay silent and focusing on myself
I guess if you don't want to hear a rejection its better to stay quiet because thats exactly what he seems to be planning
He needs both space and closeness - if things were going really well he could have been getting swept up in his things are going, and now he feels he needs to have some space for a while to collect himself and attend to other parts of his life for a while.
It's supposed to be a gradual process, with a bit of back and forth, not an irreversible closing of the distance between you two with no chance of ever increasing that at any point 😅
But pls respond to me what if we're friends for quite along time,at the last period he's just ghosting alot and right now it's been likea month without even hearing anything from him while he's online and he has nothing to do
He’s not into you girl. Could be he didn’t find value in your friendship, he noticed you liked him and he didn’t feel the same so he ghosted, he doesn’t wanna lead you on, he doesn’t vibe with you anymore. He doesn’t like you.
@@peytongomer2305 but I couldn't believe or even accept that he doesn't wanna contact anymore it's just hard,also during all the time that I was with him I was just being ma self n nice last month he was unaffected at all it's liek we talk less than b4 n just one time after abt 2 weeks I sent a snap we snap abt for minutes n then he left me again on read so I didn't send anything again
Sarah Gaib I know it must be really hard especially since you’ve been friends for ages, you could always ask him what exactly it was as communication is super important and it might help give you some closure or peace of mind. But, nonetheless, it’s still pretty clear that you should move on, find someone better because if he reciprocated your feelings, he would definitely show it (every guy shows it).
@@peytongomer2305 actually today I'll take the courage to send a msg like "hey, I've been noticed that the last time we talk was since a long time ago,ru ok? Just curious" on sc cuz I've been overthinking alot abt him n also I wanna get peace in ma mind so if he acted same I'll never ever send him a msg again
Sarah Gaib good idea! Feel free to tell me how it goes :)
I'm single for the first time since getting my Celiac diagnosis in 2016. It's such an issue and makes me feel so insecure. I'm fine in every other area, but I'm like, how do I tell him I can't kiss him because he just ate pasta? lol
Hahahaha darn girl ...the guy who likes u won't care, he will change his meals lol
Are you still married Sabrina? I see a different last name😊
Awesome advice.Sabrina!!
Yes! This is my married last name. I used to use my first and middle name.
Yeah, but how much space? How much time? Two weeks or a month of no contact because a guy needs space or needs to work through his issues is a lot.
Agreed. I'm already at the 2wk mark 🙄
@@natalieeeeeeeeeee97 don't wait on any man. That is one thing I have learned. He can catch up with you on the road to destiny. From what my guy friends have told me and from what I have seen, when a man is silent for that long, the relationship is usually done with. Cause unless his mom or someone very close to him died, or unless you're the thorn in his side, he's gonna want you close because you bring peace of mind to him.
@@ruru9400 yeah he's going through a lot of personal issues at the moment with his family, job etc and it seems like he shut out almost everyone, including me
Which is annoying because things were going really well (or so I thought) prior to that
@@natalieeeeeeeeeee97 it's a personal choice, and I would give some time for him to be alone and check in every once and a while, but in my mind I would have a deadline for that. I'm more independent, so if a man gives me too much time alone, I have a tendency to focus more on my career and myself and will forget about the relationship. And at that point that is when I will end things because it's no longer beneficial for my peace of mind. So if you are getting to a point where you don't feel comfortable with how things are, then it's time to have a conversation with him about how his behavior is making you feel (rejected, alone, etc etc). We all go through stress and process things differently. Even if he doesn't want to talk about what he's going through, shitting you out of his life for an extended amount of time is a red flag. Men treat us by what we allow.
@@ruru9400 I agree, two weeks was already too much in my mind. I sent a long text saying thank you for your time and that I enjoyed the 9mo that we spent together, hope things go well for you, and left it at that. I'd like him to come back (honestly best bf I've ever had, which makes this even worse) but it's too stressful waiting with no idea when things will be "normal" again
Heya Sabrina. I need help with something that’s maybe out of your preview, but none of your colleagues cover this. I am a widow. How do I address this with the men I date? It’s just an awkward topic and I could use your help. Further, I bet I’m not alone. Thanks for all you do and for considering my question/comment. 💖
❤❤❤
Why don't you just ask him? Us men are direct with our statements.
Well they should be who they are from the beginning if your really a frog stop pretending to be a prince and you won’t have to worry about measuring up
We lie to bang... not get married.
Do you have an email address?? I'd appreciate your response. Thanks.
Because they keep disrespecting us or flaking
Exactly I let her go
.....yea ... they also pull away because they lied the entire time and was married... lol thats usually the reason
Chose someone other than a cheater.
Met this guy month later we started having really flirty chats and phone calls. One day after having one we went about our day and I thought everything was fine but then he sent me a voice memo talking about how he wants to be careful and wants to protect me and how its important to guard our hearts and how he doesn't want me to start developing feelings for him before hes even there. I replied after thinking about what to say and I responded later on and told him I agree and that its ultimately my job to protect my heart and guard myself and that im not in my feelings and im not in that place yet and I expressed how I appreciated that he valued protecting me. After that deep conversation he said im glad were on the same page and he thanked me for taking the time to respond and right after that he withdrew everything. I moved on with our conversation bc I didn't wanna make it awkward so I texted him something casual and he left me on read and now he barely responds which isn't like him he isn't texting me or calling like he used to and now he left me on read again and I know were in the talking stages but dang after the guard your heart conversation hes totally withdrawn and barely talks to me. I felt like I did something wrong or said something wrong and I reached out and he said nothing is weird but that hes been handling some stuff going on in his business etc but its not like him to not maintain contact with me even if its sporadic but now I feel like he doesn't wanna talk to me bc hes not interested :( help me what do I do
I guess now you are seeing the true him, and i would tell you trust your guts